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The Best

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“Welcome back,” Patty calls in the least welcoming voice possible when he hears the hotel room door slam shut. He’s laid out on the bed, scrolling aimlessly through his phone.

TK drops his jacket on the back of the desk chair with a huff. He looks rumpled, his hair messed up in the way that it is when girls get their hands all in it. “Hey,” he says, giving Patty a pointed look that’s impossible to decipher.

“Well?” he prompts. “How was it?”

They have a thing, kind of. Well, it’s weird. It’s not like TK is the kind of guy who brags about the girls he gets, really. He’s a pretty nice guy. But Patty is his best friend, and it’s different to tell him about stuff than it would be to tell like, a group or something like that. He figures maybe it’s because Patty doesn’t get a lot of action, maybe he likes to live vicariously through TK’s hook-ups. Patty could get some easy if he wanted, but he usually acts like he’d rather stay at home or in the hotel room. Whatever.

TK kicks his shoes off and flops down onto the end of the bed. “Honestly, it was kinda weird.” He watches Patty’s face twitch, trying to feign indifference while pushing down his curiosity. He pushes his hair out of his face and slowly rolls over to plug his phone into its charger on the side table. Gottem, TK thinks.

“What do you mean?” Patty says, ceding to his own interest. “What, she wanted to tie you up or something?”

“No, God,” TK laughs, elbowing Patty in the shoulder as he army crawls up the bed, getting up in his grill on purpose. “It’s weird but like, I swear, the handjob was better than the actual sex.”

Patty rolls his eyes. “Shut the fuck up.”

“No, I’m serious!” He flops his head down on the pillow and closes his eyes.

He’s so close that Patty can still smell it on him, the stale sex sweat and the citrus-floral scent of perfume that rubbed off on TK’s skin. The thought of TK zipping up after he finished at some girl’s place and walking straight back to Patty’s bed sends some kind of fucked up electricity through his blood.

“Okay then,” he sighs, wishing he had more patience in this stupid game, “how.”

“Well,” TK grins. “I mean it was pretty normal at first, she was hot, she was wearing like this dark green lace thing.”

“Matching top and bottoms?”

“Yeah, well, the bra was connected to the panties with straps. Like-” TK pulls his arm out from underneath himself and traces a line from the middle of Patty’s ribs down to the waistband of his sweatpants, and then repeats on the other side of his chest. “Like that, basically.”

“Gotcha.” Patty thinks about breathing.

“Yeah, so that was hot. Anyway, so I don’t know why, but she did not want to do any foreplay. Anyway-”

“Are you sure?” He squints at TK.

“Well duh, I’m sure. I was there.” TK tucks his hair behind his ears and wiggles on the bed, trying to get comfortable. “Also, I just told you it was weird. So don’t interrupt.”


“So like I said, no foreplay. The panties had a hole in the bottom of them, so I didn’t have to take them off. That was nice because there was no way I was going to be able to figure that thing out or how to get it off. But I’m not joking when I say that she sat me down on the bed, got me out, and just… sat down. On my dick.”

Patty winces. “Whoa. She was… ready for that?”

“Yeah, she was wet enough that it was fine,” TK shrugs. His fingers find the hem of Patty’s t-shirt and he starts rubbing it between his index and his thumb. “So that was unusual, but you know, it was fine.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

TK headbutts Patty’s shoulder as hard as he can, which is really not that hard because it’s a tough angle. “I’m getting to that! God!” He gives this long dramatic sigh, and Patty considers strangling him for the second time that day. “Anyway, long story short, she bounces on my dick for maybe two and a half minutes, fakes an orgasm, and gets off.”

“...What?” Patty frowns, and turns to look TK in the eyes to try to make sure he’s not being fucked with. “Seriously?”

“Yeah! Isn’t that bizarre?” TK throws his hands in the air. “So I’m sitting there, just barely got my dick wet, but since I’m a nice guy, I ask if she wants a hand or something. But no, she says she’s good.”

“Why… would she do that?”

“That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out!” TK laughs, and leans in close to Patty like they’re sharing some kind of amazing secret. “The world may never know. But anyway. Okay. So that happened, yeah?”

Patty nods. “Yup, I’m with you.”

“But then she turns around and gives me the best handjob of my life.”

“Of your entire life.”

“Of my entire life, yeah.”

They lay in silence for a moment, and TK’s practically buzzing beside him, waiting. Patty’s going to ask, it’s part of the game. Something feels different this time around, though, and a jumpy anticipatory feeling skitters beneath his skin.

“What made it so good?”

TK hums. “Give me your hand.”

He give TK his hand without thinking.

“Okay, so,” he says, sitting up to move Patty the way he wants him. He points Patty’s fingers upright and gently squeezes so that his thumb and pinky finger are touching. Then he takes it in his hand and strokes it from his wrist to the tip of his fingers, back down again, slow. “She had me like this, yeah?”

Patty nods. He’s lightheaded.

“So it started off normal, you know,” he says, still jacking Patty’s hand.

It’s so stupid, this shouldn’t- it’s his hand, and yet-

“Then- I don’t even know how she was doing this, really, but it was like-” His thumb stayed on Patty’s fingertips, tracing in tiny circles, while the rest of his fingers kept moving up and down the slope of his knuckles, down to the back of his hand.

“That’s a move, huh,” Patty whispers.

TK’s eyes are half closed now, staring at Patty’s slender fingers in his grip. He doesn’t get ruddy like Patty does, but he’s known him long enough to know when he’s feeling it.

“Then she uh,” he says, as he stills his hand and starts rubbing the knuckle of his thumb against the inside of the first knuckle of Patty’s fingers, right underneath where the head of his dick would be. “And it felt really good.”

This is beyond swapping hookup stories, Patty’s brain supplies somewhere in the back of his mind. They were creeping towards something much different, a line he’d never quite crossed with TK.

He doesn’t care.

“Well?” He prompts, realizing now that his hand is migrating from the side of his thigh to the space where his dick would be, if it were the size of his hand. “What happened next?”

TK notices it too, and on the next pass of his hand over Patty’s, he rests the heel of his hand against where he knows Patty’s real dick is, a test. He doesn’t flinch away.

“She was still really wet,” TK leans down and says it against Patty’s ear. “So she-” he takes his hand off of Patty's for a moment, and nods solemnly when Patty keeps it in place.

His hair is getting sweaty again, and he pushes it back with his now free hands before reaching down to unzip his pants. He’s hard, Patty notices for the first time. “She reached down and,” TK cups himself, rocking into his hand before putting it back on Patty’s, “got her hand all wet.”

“Oh,” he says, and he feels like he’s losing the thread a little bit. He watches TK’s hand slide up and down and feels his hot breath against his neck, irregular pants like he’s trying to get a grip. “It felt good?”

“Yeah Pats,” TK breathes, “felt really good.”

He lays there for another moment, listening to the soft skin sounds they’re making, and he starts thinking about other sounds they could be making. “You’re hard?” he asks, even though he already knows.


“Because of me? Or because of her?”

“Fuck, Patty,” TK drops his head to his shoulder, his face pressed up into the juncture of his neck and chest. “Because of you, always.” His hips hitch forward slightly where they’re spooned together.

“Me too,” he says, and he can hear TK’s breath catch. “You should-”

“I should what?”

“Touch me.” He turns the hand that TK’s still jerking off for some reason and grabs TK by the wrist, putting his hand where he needs it. “C’mon.”

They’re sharing air now, so close that Patty barely notices when TK first presses their lips together. He does it again, with intent, and Patty can’t help the sound of relief that bubbles up and out of him.

“Is it okay if I-” TK says against his lips, his fingertips traveling under Patty’s waistband.

Patty nods so fast that they knock foreheads, which makes TK giggle. “Yeah, it’s okay.” TK puts his hand over him at first, just feeling, letting Patty get used to the sensation. His hand is so careful over the heat of him, pressing gently into the softness there. He shivers. “Teeks, it’s okay.”

TK’s fingers slide in, just a little, over his dick and between his labia. His fingers slip, and he almost pulls back in surprise. “You’re really w-”

“I know,” Patty pulls TK in for another kiss to shut him up.

He lasts longer than the green lingerie girl, which isn’t saying much, but after TK got bold enough to get two fingers inside him and his thumb on his dick, it didn’t take long for him to come.

“That was a real one, yeah?” TK smiles, wiping at Patty’s sweaty forehead with his clean hand.

“Yeah,” he nods, still too blissed out to have any kind of snarky comeback. “That was a real one.” He blows out a slow breath. TK’s still touching him, tracing the edge of his ear, the freckle beneath his eye, the line of his collarbone. “Okay,” he smiles, “my turn.”

“Your turn?” TK asks, and his surprised face is genuine, like he didn’t expect Patty to get him back.

“Yeah,” Patty pushes him over and starts working on freeing TK from his pants. “You need to pay attention, see how I do.” His face burns, and his head swims with the heady sensation of finally getting his hands on TK’s dick. “See how I stack up.”

“Patty, oh,” TK whimpers at the first touch, his eyebrows pinched and drawn up in this pitiful expression.

“I’ve barely put a hand on you baby,” Patty says, and holy fuck is he glad he came first. He blinks, trying to clear his mind, trying to remember exactly how TK did it-

He rubs his thumb over the head of TK’s dick, smearing around the wetness there while keeping his fingers moving along the shaft. “Is that it?” he asks, and he doesn’t even have to have an answer with the way TK’s sucking air through his teeth with this wet hissing sound. He keeps him pinned there for a while, enjoying the way TK’s losing it underneath him. Every once and a while he reaches up to pet at Patty’s arm or sides, and then groans like he can’t believe it’s really happening.

“Then she did this, right?” Patty starts working under the head of TK’s dick. “She got you good, huh?” TK’s thighs are shifting against the sheets now, and Patty knows he’s getting close. “Look at me, Teeks, c’mon.”

TK opens his eyes and looks up at Patty like he’s the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. Patty’s hand is ceaseless. “I don’t care,” he’s out of breath somehow, “I don’t care how good you think some girl is.” He reaches between his legs, and TK swears when he realizes what he’s about to do, mesmerized by the movement of his hand flexing in and out of himself. “Don’t care what she’s got on, or what-” he grips TK with his wet hand, and his spine arches off the bed. “Or what moves, or whatever. I can always do you one better. If that’s what you want.”

“Yes, yeah Patty,” TK whines, and with a half dozen more strokes he’s come all over Patty’s sticky hand. He flops backwards onto the bed like his strings have been cut, and Patty follows him down.

He knows he’s heavy against TK, but he doesn’t complain or even shift, he just takes his weight and runs his hands along his spine. It’s almost silent in their room, and everything rushes back to Patty: all the things they did, the things they said. Things he’s wanted to do for so long.

“Teeks,” he says into his chest after he’s been quiet for an unusual amount of time. “Everything’s good?”

“Oh yeah,” TK still sounds come-dumb. He leans down and kisses Patty’s forehead softly, and then twice more like he can’t resist. “Better than good. The best.”