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    [Kaeya Alberich is a perfectly normal, healthy 23-year-old man. That’s what he keeps telling himself as he swipes through what must by now be hundreds of photos on his Smolder dating app. It’s a weekday evening as he lounges on the couch in his small apartment, and he could definitely be elsewhere, if he felt like it. It isn't like Kaeya is lonely, it’s really more of a hobby at this point. How many eligible singles (men or women, he’s not picky on that front) can there be in Mondstadt? Eventually he has to reach the end of the list, and Smolder will show him a big blank screen that says “lower your standards, moron”.]

    Kaeya comes across his estranged childhood friend on a dating app, and determines that the account is a catfish. Taking matters into his own hands, he decides to catfish the catfish. But why are they so nice to him? And why are their Diluc pictures so good...

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