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dreaming all day

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Dejun has many, many regrets in life, but right now his number one regret was agreeing to come to this cabin for the weekend, and still agreeing, even when Donghyuck backed out.

Leaving him stuck, alone, with Jeno and Jaemin.

For an entire weekend.

(“Dejun, dude, I’m so sorry but I can’t go this weekend, I already told Jeno and Jaemin and they said you can totally ride with them, and I’m still gonna pay my share of the cabin because it’s my fault for fucking up the calendar. So have fun! Get drunk for me!”

“Wait, wait, Donghyuck, I can’t just...I can’t just third wheel for a whole weekend!” Dejun feels his voice getting higher and higher the more he speaks. “You can’t just leave me alone with them all weekend!”

“Dude, you’ll be fine, I promise, I third wheel them all the time, they’re harmless you’ll survive. I’m sure they will tone it down for you too. We can bros weekend another time, the four of us, okay?”)

Donghyuck was wrong. So far, they have not toned it down at all. Honestly, Dejun’s known them for over a year now and he’s not sure what Donghyuck was even talking about, because never once have they been able to tone it down. 

It’s just...so much more, now that it’s just the three of them, when usually he has Donghyuck, or Renjun, or Lucas as a buffer for their — everything.

It’s also made so much worse because of the fact Dejun has not been able to trample down his stupid fucking attraction to both of them, especially not with how Jaemin has been hanging off of him recently and Jeno’s been smiling at him like he smiles at Jaemin, sometimes, and he’s not exactly sure what to do about that. 

He can’t think too much about it or his brain becomes a mess.

The thing is, Jeno and Jaemin have been dating as long as they’ve been alive, at least that’s how it feels. Even before Dejun was introduced to them, he knew that, knew that they came together and were always a package deal. It wasn’t “Jeno and Jaemin”; it was always “JenoAndJaemin”.

Dejun is just so gay and so weak and they are both so pretty.

They’ve only just arrived at the cabin, secluded into the mountains. They chose a spot that fit in their budget nicely, small but cozy, with both the fireplace and the hot tub Jaemin was insistent on having. It snowed recently, and it looks almost idyllic, pine trees lining the driveway covered in a dusting of white.

Dejun is grateful that they’re finally out of the car and unpacking. The whole ride up he couldn’t stop staring at their hands clasped together over the center console, see how nicely their fingers fit together. For the entire 3 hours. 

Dejun kept his hands folded in his lap the whole time and tried not to lose his mind watching how softly Jeno’s thumb brushed over Jaemin’s knuckles.

Look. He’s fine. Their hands are just — really nice. 

Dejun is snapped out of his reverie by Jeno slipping by him, saying, “Here, I can take that too,” before grabbing the 24-pack from Dejun’s hands and stacking it on top of the cooler in his arms.

His sweater is very tight. Dejun can see his biceps flex. He swallows, throat suddenly dry, before stammering out a thanks. Jeno smiles at him in return, eyes becoming little crescents, before making his way through the front door and leaving Dejun standing dumbly by the trunk of the car.

It is going to be a very long weekend.

❄️❄️❄️❄️

They leave all their stuff piled in the front entryway as they explore the cabin. The plan originally was for Donghyuck and Dejun to share the second bedroom, Jeno and Jaemin obviously getting the master. Now that Donghyuck isn’t here, Dejun has assumed he’d get the second bedroom to himself.

Clearly, Jaemin has other plans.

Dejun finds himself getting dragged by his arm to the master bedroom, Jaemin practically tackling him onto the bed.

“Sleepover weekend!” Jaemin declares, Jeno watching them from the doorway. Dejun feels flustered, Jaemin’s arms wrapped around him, keeping him trapped against the mattress.

“Um — I mean, I just figured you guys would want this room to yourselves? I can just take the second bedroom like we planned originally...? That’s fine with me...” Dejun can’t seem to stop everything he’s saying from coming out like a question, but his sweater has ridden up a bit and he can feel Jaemin’s fingertips against his skin and it’s a lot.

“Dejun,” Jaemin says, lifting himself up to make better eye contact with him. “Dejun, we aren’t going to leave you alone in a room. This bed is far too big for Jeno and I to sleep in alone, you have to stay in here with us. Plus, it’s so comfortable.”

Jaemin lets go of him, flopping onto his back with his arms spread out and sinking into the mattress with a contented sigh. Dejun pointedly does not pay attention to the sound, lifting himself up on his elbows to look at Jeno.

“I mean. I guess that I can, um, stay in here if that’s cool with you?” he asks, awkwardly. Jeno rolls his eyes, making his way over to the bed to sit on the corner of it and flicking Dejun in the forehead.

“Of course it’s okay. Trust me, having someone to buffer Jaemin in bed is appreciated; if you think he’s clingy normally, just you wait.”

Dejun giggles, nervously, completely unsure how he’s going to handle that if he can barely handle Jaemin during the day. But that’s LaterDejun’s problem.

Jaemin claps his hands above his head, sitting back up.

“Alright! Now that that’s settled, can we fucking eat? I’m starving.

And with that, the mood shifts, Dejun and Jeno nodding in agreement as they all make their way back to the entryway to gather all their stuff.

❄️❄️❄️❄️

No one’s feeling up to making something big for dinner, which they had assumed when planning this weekend, so they stick a couple of frozen pizzas in the oven and crack open a few beers.

They explore the house a bit more while the pizzas cook, reconvening in the kitchen when the oven beeps. They demolish the pizza, washing it down with more beer until Dejun feels a pleasant buzz running through him.

Tired, the three of them pile into the living room to chill on the couch, exhausted from the drive and the long week behind them, ready to settle into a night. Jeno lights the fireplace, filling the room with a warm orange glow, 

The sectional is big, taking up most of the empty space in the room, nestled in front of the fireplace and the TV. Dejun goes to sit towards one side, but as seems common now, Jaemin instead drags him to sit in-between them. Jaemin and Jeno flank his side, sitting much closer than they have to be.

“You know, we could spread out if you want, it would probably be more comfortable…” Dejun trails off as Jaemin throws his legs across both his and Jeno’s laps.

“I’m plenty comfortable; aren’t you, Jen?” he asks, his chin digging into Dejun’s shoulder. Dejun can feel his breath on his neck. Jeno settles in closer, reaching out to hold Jaemin’s hand across his lap and hums, agreeing.

Dejun craves death.

Jeno procures a blanket, wrapping it across their legs as they scroll through Netflix. Dejun feels warm: from the fire, the blanket, the boys surrounding him. He somehow feels on edge but comfortable at the same time, figuring there’s no escape now and he might as well settle into the couch.

He dozes off at one point, waking up disoriented some amount of time later with a crick in his neck from where he’s leaned onto Jeno’s shoulder. They’ve all shifted on the couch, Jaemin still strewn across him and Jeno, but laying down on a pillow instead of curling into Dejun. Dejun, instead, has completely sunk into Jeno’s side, Jeno’s arm wrapped around him.

Dejun is warm, sleep-foggy, and snuggles closer into Jeno’s side without thinking. He can feel his breath on his forehead, feels Jaemin’s palm hot on his knee, and that’s when his brain finally kicks in, like, holy shit, wait.

He feels his whole body jump, because of course it does, he has never learned how to stay fucking chill. Jeno’s hand stills on his side, and he puts space in between them so he can look at Dejun directly. He looks concerned, forehead creasing.

“Hey, you okay?” Jeno asks him, softly, the movie a dull soundtrack in the background. Dejun swallows, body suddenly feeling too tight, too wound up, needing to escape.

“Yeah — yeah I’m. Good. All good, just um, think maybe it’s time for bed?” And it’s then that Dejun remembers, oh my god we’re sharing a fucking bed. But at least hopefully on the bed he can breathe. “I’m just gonna—” he managed to unwind himself from the two of them on the couch, ignoring Jaemin’s small noise of protest, “go um, wash up and change and. Go to bed. Feel free to stay down here! I’m just, you know, tired. Long day. Yeah.”

With that, he bolts back upstairs, as casually as possible, shutting the door and leaning against it to slow his pounding heart beat.

He’s fucked.

Dejun takes a deep breath, collecting himself. He’s grown used to Jeno and Jaemin being touchy, being all up in his space, especially Jaemin who he thinks needs to be touching someone at all times, but this — this feels different, feels more intimate. He’s not exactly sure what to do with it. Jeno and Jaemin are the couple, practically soulmates or whatever and he’s just...he’s just Xiao Dejun, their friend.

They haven’t gotten a lot of time to be alone, the three of them, which is probably why it seems like so much more to him now. There’s no one else to spread their touchiness too so it all goes to him. This is the only thing that helps make sense of everything in his head, so he’s sure that that’s the reason.

He just now has to figure out how to deal with the two boys he’s harboring massive crushes on being all over him for the weekend.

He’ll be fine.

❄️❄️❄️❄️

Dejun manages to go to bed without an interruption, Jeno and Jaemin staying downstairs to finish whatever movie they’re watching (honestly, he’s not even sure what they picked out in the end). The bed is extremely comfortable, and he passes out the second his head hits the pillow, not letting himself overthink things anymore than he already has.

By the time he wakes up, he’s hot, the sun streaming in brightly through the shoddy blinds. He feels heavy and — oh, that would explain it.

Jeno and Jaemin are flanking him from either side, Dejun once again stuck in the middle. Jaemin’s arms are wrapped tight against him, his shirt riding up so that they’re skin against skin underneath the comforter. Jeno’s legs are tangled in his, Dejun’s back against his front.

He can feel the lines of Jeno’s abs through his thin tee, feel the hot press of Jaemin’s palm on his hip, and it’s then he realizes he’s fucking hard, wrapped up in two of his best friends.

Shit.

Dejun begs his body not to go into panic mode, again, noting that both Jeno and Jaemin’s breathing is still even, subdued, both of them deep asleep as Dejun attempts to will his boner away. 

It doesn’t work.

He tries to remain as still as possible, despite his horny brain yelling at him to grind back onto Jeno, grind forward against Jaemin, anything that will give him friction.

He has two options.

One: manage to subdue his boner, not move, and patiently wait until Jeno and Jaemin wake up. Not moving. At All. No movement whatsoever, he will pretend to be asleep. Then they will all laugh at how they’ve moved in the night and Jeno and Jaemin will obviously cuddle up on each other instead, since they’re boyfriends, and they will all make breakfast and everything will be fine!

Two: Dejun removes himself from the situation, slipping out of their warm and comfortable embrace to go….scream into the couch downstairs? Jerk off in the shower? Both sound like viable options right now, if he’s being honest.

Dejun once again feels like dying, so he goes with option two to at least hopefully regain some of his sanity.

Except, it backfires, because as Dejun is trying to very, very, slowly slip out of their embrace, Jeno stirs behind him, tugging him closer against his body. 

Dejun lets out an uncontrollable squeak. He feels Jeno’s breath against his neck, his hair tickling his skin, and squeezes his eyes shut.

He waits until Jeno’s breath evens out once again, before prying his and Jaemin’s arms off his body. He slips out through the bottom of the bed as stealthily as he can.

The two of them shift when they feel his absence, burrowing into each other instead. Dejun takes a second to look at them, bodies finding each other like it’s more natural than breathing.

He wishes he had that.

Dejun sighs, turning back towards the door to try and get in a long shower before they wake up, maybe make it to the kitchen first to start breakfast.

❄️❄️❄️❄️

“Mmmm, what are you making, smells good,” Jaemin murmurs in his ear, plastering himself on Dejun’s back. Dejun jumps, startled by the sudden warmth. He’s shocked he doesn’t knock over the pan.

Jaemin laughs as he backs off a bit, giving Dejun some space, but keeping his arms loosely wrapped around his waist. Dejun is sure that his ears are red at this point and his mind went blank the second he felt Jaemin’s breath on his ear.

Dejun grips the handle of the spatula harder, not letting himself turn around to face Jaemin.

“Oh, just some omelettes. You guys were asleep, so, I figured I could just start breakfast in the meantime? It’s not anything fancy…” Dejun rambles. Jaemin shifts closer again, resting his chin on his shoulder to peer at the pan of eggs. 

Dejun wasn’t lying, it really isn’t anything fancy, he just threw together a random assortment of things they bought in the fridge, folding it all into some eggs. Jaemin hums, a warm weight on Dejun’s back and they stand there together, watching the eggs fry up in the pan.

“I didn’t know you could cook, Dejun. What can’t you do?” Jaemin says, teasingly. His fingertips press briefly into Dejun’s sides, and Dejun swallows, trying to ignore the swirling of residual horniness from this morning. He is absolutely not thinking about how close Jaemin’s dick is to his ass right now.

“Hahaha. Um.” Dejun laughs nervously, trying to clear his fucking head to say an actual sentence. “It’s almost done actually, if you wanted to set the table.”

Jaemin squeezes him softly around the waist before releasing Dejun from his hold, rummaging through the cabinets near the sink to collect plates for breakfast.

“Jeno’s showering now, but he should be done any second I’m sure,” Jaemin says, piling silverware on top of the plates. Dejun nods in response, turning off the stove, grabbing a platter of his own to drop the omelette on, taking the rest out of the oven where he had been keeping them warm since he didn’t have enough space on the stove.

He follows Jaemin out into the dining room, a cozy, sunlit table awaiting them. Jaemin has set out the plates and silverware, and Dejun places the platters of omelettes in the center.

“There’s also coffee in the pot, if you wanted some,” Dejun says to Jaemin as he takes a seat near the window. Jaemin smiles brightly, slipping back into the kitchen to presumably pour himself a mug. Dejun’s sure it’s probably shit compared to the overly expensive coffee maker he knows that Jaemin and Jeno have at home, but, it’ll do.

Jeno pads into the kitchen a few seconds later, hair wet. Dejun pointedly ignores the few drops of water dripping down his neck, dampening the collar of his white shirt. Jeno gives him a soft smile and a “good morning”, claiming the seat next to him.

Jeno stares in surprise at the food before him. “Did you make breakfast, Dejun? You’re amazing.” 

Dejun nods, dazed by the full force of Jeno’s smile directed at him. How does anyone look like that? You can’t just be built like a god while also having the nicest smile he’s ever seen on anyone. It just isn’t fair, to him especially. He wants to trace the crinkles by his eyes.

Jaemin finally rejoins them, two mugs of coffee in his hands. He passes one to Jeno, before taking his own seat and all of them digging into breakfast. Minutes pass in easy silence, all of them eating their way through the food Dejun made, not having to talk much.

“Dejun this is really good,” Jeno says. He rests his chin on his hand, staring softly at Dejun. “Can you just move in with us and cook for us every day?”

Dejun blushes, ducking his head at the praise. He busies his hands in his lap, letting out a huff of laughter.

“Renjun might kill me, if I tried to skip out on rent. So, you’ll have to take that up with him,” he jokes. He takes another bite to stop himself from rambling and making a bigger idiot of himself. Jeno laughs at Dejun’s joke, the sound ringing in Dejun’s ears.

The rest of breakfast passes easily, Jeno and Jaemin both shoo Dejun out as he tries to help clean up. He leaves the kitchen, hands up in mock surrender, retreating back to their bedroom to get dressed.

They previously decided to spend the day snowboarding, as the cabin was close to multiple ski lodges in the area. Dejun’s never actually been snowboarding, but he knows how to skateboard, so he figures it’s about the same thing.

By the time he’s changed into different clothes, Jeno and Jaemin have both made their way back to the bedroom as well, all of them gathering their jackets and snow pants to pack into the car so they can head out.

“I like your sweater,” Jaemin says casually. As he passes Dejun to get to his suitcase, his fingers brush the cable knit fabric lightly. Dejun tries not to blush.

The area they’re going to snowboard at is only about 30 minutes away. Dejun gets shotgun this time and scrolls through the road trip playlist they made, playing only the best songs. Out of the three of them, he’s the only one who hasn’t tried any winter sports before this trip, so Jaemin gives him some tips that he takes earnestly, nodding along to whatever he says.

They make it to the ski lodge easily, parking and piling on their winter gear, before trudging up to the main building to rent their boards.

Dejun doesn’t think much about it until they’ve gotten all their stuff together and are making their way to the ski lift but — oh. Shit. The lift goes… really high.

He freezes in his tracks. Jeno notices and nudges his shoulder.

“Hey. You okay?” He asks him, concern evident in his eyes. Dejun just swallows, watching as the lift takes people higher and higher and higher until he can’t even see them in the fog.

He uh, may have forgotten about his fear of heights.

“Y-yeah. Just. Wow. That goes… high, doesn’t it,” Dejun stutters out breathily. Understanding washes over Jeno’s face as he grabs one of Dejun’s gloved hands in his own, squeezing it gently.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. I’m gonna go up with you, yeah? You won’t even notice once we’re in it, I promise.

Jaemin pouts when Jeno tells him he’s going up with Dejun instead, which, Dejun understands because he’s sure he would like to sit with his boyfriend. Thankfully Jaemin doesn’t make a fuss, grabbing the next chair that comes along and waving at them as it takes him up, up, up.

Dejun swallows the heavy lump that’s formed in his throat.

Jeno still has a firm grasp on his hand, steadying him. Dejun is grateful for it. They’re next to depart the lift and Dejun wonders if he can just… go back and sit in the car for the whole afternoon instead, that sounds safer.

Unfortunately for him, Jeno brings them both to the standing area. Dejun takes a deep breath, listening to Jeno calmly explain to him when he should sit back and that he can close his eyes if he needs to.

Jeno’s hand grounds him, Jeno sitting so close that if they weren’t wearing layers of snow pants he’d be able to feel the heat of him against his thigh. Dejun opens his eyes and all he can see in front of him is the snow covered mountain, Jaemin’s own chair looking far away.

Beside him, Jeno is keeping up a steady stream of talk, which is helping immensely in calming Dejun down. He’s talking about everything and nothing, from his two cats to the dinner he burnt for him and Jaemin last week to a shitty coworker at his job. 

Dejun lets the sound of his voice and the crisp winter air wash over him until he can eventually relax his shoulders and take a deep breath in.

“Doing okay?” Jeno asks softly, squeezing his hand.

“Yeah,” Dejun breathes out, squeezing Jeno’s hand back. And — he really is, his heartbeat is almost back at its regular pace and he doesn’t feel like he’s about to panic and fall out of this chair like he did. “Sorry, I just — didn’t think about the fact that in order to snowboard we’d, like, actually have to go up the mountain. Dumb, I know. Sorry about that.”

“Not dumb,” Jeno says, expression serious. “Don’t feel bad, you never have to apologize for something that scares you. Things are scary! That’s life! If you had really needed to bail, I would’ve gone back to the cabin with you and made hot chocolate or something. I’m really proud of you for going with it though.”

Beneath them, the snow shines so bright, reflecting in Jeno’s eyes and Dejun can’t stop staring, entranced. He just nods, dumbly, not knowing exactly how to respond when Jeno gets so serious.

Jeno’s expression morphs into one of warmth, trying his best to scoot even closer to Dejun without rocking the chair at all. He lets go of his hand to wrap it around Dejun’s shoulders instead, tugging him closer into him into a mock hug.

“Don’t be scared to let me know when you’re afraid. I want to do whatever I can to help, okay?” Jeno says this into Dejun’s hair, and Dejun has never felt this surge of care from another person before, he’s a little overwhelmed.

“Okay,” he says softly into Jeno’s jacket, unsure if he can even hear him over the hiss of the wind as they inch closer and closer to the top of the mountain. Jeno keeps him close to him until the very last second, grabbing Dejun’s hand again as they prepare to jump off the chairlift, quickly moving to the side to join Jaemin where he’s waiting for them.

Dejun’s cheeks are red and he doesn’t know if it’s from the cold or from Jeno.

❄️❄️❄️❄️

Dejun fails horribly at snowboarding. It’s almost embarrassing. 

He’s so bad that Jaemin and Jeno switch off helping him out and holding his hands, so. He can’t count it as a complete loss, even if he falls onto his ass more than he’d care to admit. Either way, it’s fun, and they make their way back to the car exhausted and laughing hours later after returning their equipment.

The ride back to the cabin is quieter than the morning ride out, all of them worn out from snowboarding and ready to chill out and relax for the rest of the night. 

Jeno takes it upon himself to make the spiked cider, as Jaemin deals with dinner and Dejun takes a much needed shower. The water pounds out a lot of his exhaustion and knots from the day and he spends longer than he normally does under the hot spray.

The shower gives him time to clear his thoughts a bit, something sorely needed after 24 hours in constant JaeminAndJeno contact. It’s been overwhelming, to say the least, and he’s truly not sure what to make of everything. He knows they’re always… kind of like this to an extent, but it feels like it’s been dialed up to 100 this whole time they’ve been here.

His weak, gay heart can’t take it. One can only be so strong.

It doesn’t fully make sense to him, because they’re together, they’ve been together for god knows how long, why are they even wasting their time… flirting? If that’s what it is? With him.

He doesn’t understand it at all. Maybe it’s just some game they’re playing between the two of them? Which. That would make him feel kind of bad, and he doesn’t actually think they’re the type to do that, but he can’t think of any reasonable explanation otherwise. 

Are they bored? If so, he definitely doesn’t want to get into the middle of that. They need to figure that out on their own, Dejun and his feelings cannot get involved with that.

He doesn’t even realize he’s spent over 20 minutes in the shower just thinking, until Jeno knocks on the door asking if he’ll be done soon because dinner’s almost ready.

Dejun isn’t sure where they go from here, and he has no more answers than he did before stepping into the shower. But he shuts off the water, drying off as quickly as possible so he can slip into some sweats and make his way downstairs for dinner.

Jaemin has thrown together a pasta dish, and the spiked cider Jeno’s made is warm, and goes down easily, heating him up from inside out. They eat quickly, ravenous from the physical activity of the day, and wash it all down with the cider until they’re warmed throughout and giggly.

“Okay. It’s officially hot tub time,” Jaemin declares, pushing his chair back from the table. Both Dejun and Jeno agree, Dejun this time taking care of the dishes while Jeno and Jaemin change.

He’s just drying off the last pot when Jeno makes his way back to the kitchen and everything Dejun is doing or thinking stops in his tracks. Because he forgot one of the things about going in a hot tub is that they would all be in their swim trunks. Shirtless. 

Specifically, that Jeno and Jaemin would be shirtless, looking like that

Dejun stares far longer than should be acceptable with your shirtless friend, at the lines of Jeno’s abs, the dip of his hips into the waistband of his shorts, the flex of his back and he reaches up to rummage through a cabinet.

Fuck.

“Take your time; Jaemin and I are going to go out now, though,” Jeno says, casually, heading over to the stove to refill their mugs of cider, winking at Dejun as he exits the kitchen again. Dejun isn’t sure if he’s like, moved or blinked or breathed since Jeno walked in, but in his wake he clutches the counter top and takes one steadying breath in.

Oh no.

He’s grateful Jaemin slips out the back door without talking to him first because he doesn’t think he can handle both of them in the bright lights of the kitchen.

Dejun tries his best to calm down as he gets changed himself, grabbing a spare towel from the closet and his refilled mug of cider before heading out the back door to the deck. His body is warm even in the chill of the night, and he’s thankful for the alcohol coat as he quickly walks over the the hot tub where —

Jeno is perched in Jaemin’s lap and they’re definitely making out with each other.

Dejun falters in his steps, not exactly sure what he should do or if he should… interrupt?

God, they look good together, Jeno’s arms wrapped around Jaemin’s neck, Jaemin’s chin tilted up to meet Jeno in the middle. He can see their lips moving in the dim porch lights, see the slightest hint of tongue when they move against each other.

Dejun feels frozen in place, but his body betrays him, his foot slipping on the step, alerting them to his presence. Jeno detaches himself from Jaemin’s mouth, but makes no move to remove himself from his lap. They both look at Dejun, and Jaemin raises an eyebrow at him, before asking, “Well, are you going to get in? It’s cold out.”

Dejun can’t argue with that, his teeth starting to chatter without him even realizing, too distracted by the entire scene in front of him. He makes his way up the steps of the hot tub, gingerly lowering himself in the water. He does his best to not jostle the mug in his hands too much, taking a sip from it as he submerges himself across from the two of them.

Dejun sets the mug down on the ledge next to him. Jeno is still on Jaemin’s lap, but he turns around at least to face Dejun. Jaemin’s arms stay wrapped around his waist underneath the water.

“Hi, took you long enough!” Jeno says, eyes smiling at Dejun who just. Stares at the two of them. This is getting to be too much, he thinks. His eyes trace the lines of their shoulder out of the water, the sharp jut of their collarbones. 

Unfortunate that he had to get a hard-on for two boys who look like they were literally chiseled from marble. Dejun can feel that he’s already half hard in his swim trunks, replaying the scene of their makeout over and over in his head, how their bodies looked on each other.

Dejun shrugs, finally, which luckily they both accept, and settles further into the water as he’s forced to stare at how their damp skin glistens in the light. 

Why the fuck did he think this was a good idea?

“Why are you so far away?” Jaemin asks, and Dejun can hear his pout, even if he can’t fully see it. Before he knows it, Jaemin has pushed Jeno lightly off of his lap, and is making his way across the hot tub to Dejun.

At first, Dejun expects him to just attach himself to his side as he usually does, but this time, Jaemin takes it one step further by sitting directly on Dejun’s lap .

“Haha. Wait— ” Dejun says to no avail. Jaemin doesn’t listen, just settles himself more comfortably, hands resting on his shoulder as he sits back on his thighs. Dejun is supremely grateful for where he sits, because at least it means Jaemin won’t be able to feel how he’s already starting to get a boner just from watching him and Jeno makeout, which he’s pretty sure classifies as fucking weird. He absolutely does not need anyone to know about that, ever.

“See! Bonding!” Jaemin says, fingers scratching at the hair on Dejun’s neck. Dejun doesn’t even know what to do at this point other than giggle awkwardly, shifting a bit on the hot tub bench to better accommodate Jaemin in his lap.

Dejun looks past Jaemin’s shoulder to make eye contact with Jeno, who is staring at the two of them with an unreadable expression in his gaze.

It’s then that Jaemin shifts, pulling himself closer into Dejun’s lap, pushing himself right against his dick. Oh my god. Dejun bites his lip to stop any sounds, but he knows Jaemin can feel where he’s at half-hard, and his face flares in embarrassment.

Jaemin’s face morphs into something dark, looking down at Dejun with a simmer in his eyes. Dejun swallows, averting his gaze, his throat suddenly dry as Jaemin grinds down, slowly, with purpose.

Fuck.

“Are you hard, Dejun?” Jaemin asks point blank, smirk on his face as he stares at him.

“Um,” Dejun says.

There are both a thousand thoughts flitting through his head right now and also absolutely no thoughts whatsoever. He doesn’t know what to do with his hands. Jeno is still staring at the two of them over Jaemin’s shoulder. What the fuck.

Jaemin grinds down on him again and Dejun involuntarily lets out a whimper, the pressure against his dick too good. Jaemin’s fingers tilt Dejun’s chin up so that Dejun is making eye contact with him.

“We were hoping you’d see us, you know,” Jaemin says casually, like he’s talking about the weather, not about Dejun catching him making out with his boyfriend. He feels the water move around them, Jeno sliding over to flank Dejun’s side, focused.

Jesus fucking Christ, Dejun is going to die in this hot tub.

He can’t seem to bring himself to form an actual sentence right now. Jaemin is still sitting on his dick and Jeno is leaning into his side, running his fingers through his hair as his gaze is set on Dejun’s face.

“Did you like watching us?” Jeno asks, voice lower than Dejun’s ever heard it. It creeps over his skin, warming him from inside out, and he feels like the temperature of the water just skyrocketed.

He figures, fuck it, he’s in this now. Might as well be honest. 

“Y-yes,” he squeaks as Jeno tugs lightly on his hair. “Yeah, I — I liked it.” 

Jaemin’s gaze sharpens, grip on Dejun’s chin tightening. Dejun lets out a small whimper.

“You wanna watch us, Dejun? Wanna watch Jeno fuck me on the bed we’re all sleeping on? He’s really good at it, you know.” Dejun thinks he’s nodding, but all he can focus on is the tone of Jaemin’s voice, the way his lips move as he utterly destroys Dejun’s sanity. 

Jaemin moves closer, mouth next to Dejun’s ear, before murmuring the killing shot. “Or, you could fuck me instead while Jeno watches.”

If Dejun wasn’t hard before, he’s absolutely hard now. 

“Either. Both. I don’t know, oh my god,” Dejun says, rambling.

At his agreement, Jeno’s hand grips tight in his hair, pulling him to the side to seal their mouths together. Dejun melts, Jeno wasting no time licking against his lips to slip inside. Dejun can barely move, Jaemin still pinning him to the bench, but his hands scramble under the water to try and pull Jeno even closer, slipping against his bare skin.

“Fuck,” he hears Jaemin say, “this is even hotter than I imagined.”

Dejun tries to keep up, but Jeno kisses like he wants to absolutely devour him, and he has no choice but to give in, letting Jeno claim his mouth completely. Jaemin’s fingers are rubbing into the nape of his neck, sending shivers down his spine. Dejun isn’t sure he’s breathing at this point, but fuck him if he breaks this kiss.

Jeno,” Jaemin whines eventually, and if that sound doesn’t send a bolt of heat to Dejun’s dick, Dejun isn’t sure what would. “I wanna kiss him too.”

He’s not sure how long has passed making out with Jeno, but he doesn’t get time to dwell on it before Jeno is breaking them apart and Jaemin is turning his head back toward him instead, smiling sharply at him.

“Hi,” Dejun breathes, dazed, before Jaemin ducks down to kiss him. His lips already feel kiss swollen from Jeno, but Jaemin feels so good against him, lips slightly chapped and cold from the winter air blowing around them. He doesn’t know where to touch, surrounded by too much skin, and moves one of his hands to wrap around Jaemin’s back, holding him. 

Jaemin kisses differently than Jeno, more controlled, deeper. Whereas Jeno kissed like he was trying to claim him, Jaemin drags his tongue slower, lips moving against his like molten lava, and Dejun sinks deeper back into the seat, every kiss feeling like a brand. 

He jumps when he feels Jeno’s mouth at his neck, skimming the damp skin with his teeth. It’s so fucking much, and they aren’t doing anything except kissing.

When Jeno bites down and Dejun’s hips involuntarily rut up, Jaemin breaks the kiss.

“Maybe we should take this inside. Where there is a bed,” Jaemin suggests, breathing heavy. 

Dejun tries to catch his own breath, shutting his eyes as he tries to slow his pounding heartbeat and nodding. Jeno slips his hand into his, pulling him up and out of the water.

The air is frigid now that they’re no longer surrounded by the steaming water of the hot tub and they all run to grab their towels and quickly slip into the warm air of the cabin. Jeno wastes no time once they’re in to push Dejun against the wall and kiss him again, palms hot on his hips.

Dejun gasps, tangling his fingers into Jeno’s hair as he presses his body against his. He feels Jeno’s erection against his hip, which, holy shit, he did that. 

Jeno moves to trail his lips down Dejun’s jaw, catching the water dripping from his hair, tongue flicking out against his skin to chase it.

“We have — fuck —” Dejun breaks off as Jeno catches a sensitive part of his neck. “Bed. We have. A bed.”

Jeno nips lightly at his skin before pulling away, Dejun catching Jaemin staring at them, eyes dark. Jaemin, who is… shit, hard too, swim trunks hiding nothing, hip cocked like he’s showing it off.

“Mm. Yes. Bed,” Jeno murmurs, and then lifts Dejun into his arms to carry him.

Oh my god.

He can feel Jeno’s arms around him, his biceps flexing as he carries him like he’s nothing, Jaemin leading the way upstairs to the bedroom. How is this even happening right now? Dejun cannot understand how every single one of his deep, hidden, repressed fantasies about the two of them is coming true. 

Jaemin has already made himself comfy on the bed when they make it to the room, Jeno dropping Dejun lightly on the mattress. Immediately, he crawls over him, and Jaemin rolls over on his side to skirt his fingers lightly up Dejun’s stomach.

“You’re okay with this, right?” Jeno asks, seriously, hovering above him.

“Yes? I mean. Yes. Definitely yes, I am okay with this. One hundred percent okay with this, please someone do something now,” Dejun manages to say in a mostly level voice.

Jeno flashes him a smile, all teeth.

“Awesome. Can I blow you?” Jeno asks, tilting his head to the side when he asks. He looks a little bit like a puppy. A really, really, sexy puppy.

Yeah okay, Dejun’s lost it already.

He nods, vigorously, biting his lip as Jeno takes the go ahead to slip down his swim trunks, exposing Dejun’s erection. He’s so fucking hard, feels like he’s been hard for hours, and is not sure how he’s supposed to last when he feels completely overwhelmed already.

Jeno moves down to settle himself in between Dejun’s legs, as Jaemin tips his head to the side to press their lips together again. He gasps into Jaemin’s mouth when he feels Jeno wrap a hand around his cock and lick carefully around the head.

“He’s really good at this, you'll see. He likes it when you pull his hair,” Jaemin murmurs. Dejun doesn’t answer, instead using one arm to pull Jaemin closer to him and kiss him back desperately, tangling his other hand into Jeno’s hair as he swallows his dick down.

Dejun has never been more grateful for a quick refractory period, because Jeno is currently sucking the life out of him through his dick and he is not going to last. He feels like he’s been pent up for hours, and he knows he’s going to come embarrassingly fast if Jeno keeps doing that thing with his tongue.

He can’t multitask to save his life, breaking apart from Jaemin to let out a low moan and gripping harder into Jeno’s hair as Jeno swirls his tongue around the head. He tries to look at Jeno but it’s too much, his lips cherry red where they’re wrapped around his dick, face scrunching up in pleasure every time Dejun tugs at his hair a little bit.

Jaemin has disappeared from beside him, but he can’t focus enough to figure out where he went as he’s already feeling the tell tale signs that his orgasm is about to hit. His balls draw up and his dick pulses in Jeno’s mouth and he barely has time to let out a, “Fuck, Jeno, I’m—” before Jeno’s lips suction around his shaft and he’s coming in his mouth.

His release hits him so hard he feels boneless, feeling Jeno swallow around him and pump him through his orgasm. Jeno lets go of his dick with a wet pop, wiping the back of his hand across his mouth. He looks fucking wrecked, lips swollen, face flushed, hair a mess, and all Dejun can think is I did that.

Dejun’s mind feels so slow like molasses as the aftershocks of his orgasm roll through him that he almost forgets about Jaemin until he hears a wet noise next to him. Jeno raises himself up from between Dejun’s legs to look towards his left.

“Hey, no fair, I wanted to do that,” Jeno says, pouting. His voice sounds hoarse and it makes Dejun’s dick twitch again, despite just coming harder than he has in months. 

Dejun cranes his neck over to see Jaemin spread out on the other side of the bed, working one finger into himself.

Oh my god, he thinks.

“Oh my god,” he says. He’s mesmerized, watching Jaemin’s finger disappear inside of him, his cock hard against his abs.

“Would love, ah, a little help here,” Jaemin says, looking at the two of them watching him. Dejun can barely feel his body, but he doesn’t think he’d ever be able to deny Jaemin anything, not when he’s looking at him like that.

He and Jeno rearrange themselves so that Dejun is between Jaemin’s spread knees and Jeno is laying against his right side, hand coming up to play with one of Jaemin’s nipples, making him whimper. Dejun will file that away for… later.

He can’t believe he has Jaemin spread out in front of him like this, fucking a finger into his hole to prep himself for Dejun’s cock. Because he’s going to fuck him. While Jeno, his boyfriend, watches. Jeno who just sucked Dejun’s dick.

If Dejun is dreaming, he would like to never wake up.

Jeno passes Dejun the lube, who takes it with shaky hands, opening the cap and drizzling some out onto his fingers. He uses his clean hand to grip Jaemin’s thigh, tracing Jaemin’s hole where it’s stretched around his own finger before slipping inside.

Jaemin lets out a guttural sound, and he’s tight around Dejun, as his finger slides in against Jaemin’s. They manage to work out a rhythm together, fucking in and out slowly, Dejun crooking up every few thrusts to drag along his walls.

“One more,” Jaemin gasps, as he starts to relax. Dejun looks around for the lube, but Jeno has taken it from him, slicking up one of his own fingers and reaching down to join them.

Fuck, this is the hottest thing Dejun has ever done. He’s not sure if any sex will ever top this in the future, watching Jaemin’s hole swallow all three of their fingers, Jaemin widening his legs to better accommodate all of their hands.

Jaemin keeps making these small noises, little whimpers and keens, and Dejun is already hard again, dick hanging heavy as he leans over to fuck his finger deeper into Jaemin.

“Fuck, fuck I’m good, I’m fine, please fuck me now,” Jaemin moans, making Dejun’s cock jump and leak out a drop of precome. They all slip out their fingers, Jaemin groaning as he clenches around nothing. Jeno passes Dejun a condom that he’s procured from somewhere, and Dejun rips it open, sliding it down his dick with shaky hands.

When he looks up again, they have rearranged so that Jaemin is lying back against Jeno’s chest, Jeno’s arms wrapped loosely around him. They look so hot that Dejun pauses in his tracks, just to look at them. 

Jeno notices, because of course he does, expression softening a little bit.

“You still with us?” he asks him. Dejun nods, trying to focus on the task at hand once again.

The task being fucking Jaemin.

He shuffles up the bed to line the tip of his dick up with Jaemin’s hole, biting his lip as he looks at the two of them. Their eyes are both so, so dark, and Dejun is a goner. He leans forward, balancing on one arm and pushes in slowly until he’s fully inside, Jaemin’s ass pressed against his hips.

Jaemin wraps his legs around Dejun’s back, as Dejun stares, mesmerized, at where Jaemin’s hole is stretched around him.

“Move, please,” Jaemin says, voice strained. “See if you can fuck me better than Jeno can.”

That lights a fire within Dejun’s stomach; he’s never one to back down from a challenge. He pulls almost all the way out, before fucking back in, hard, drawing a low moan out of Jaemin. 

He is very determined to keep making him make that noise.

Dejun loses himself in fucking Jaemin, Jeno keeping him steady on the bed as he rocks into him again and again. At one point, Jeno grasps Dejun’s hand in his and they stay like that, holding Jeno’s hand while he fucks his boyfriend to the best of his ability.

Jeno uses his free hand to jerk Jaemin off, and Dejun’s eyes keep flitting between his hand around Jaemin’s shaft and his dick as he fucks harder into Jaemin.

Dejun angles his hips a bit and Jaemin shouts, clenching tight around his cock.

“Fuck, oh my god, right there, Jeno please move so I can suck you off, shit .” Jaemin’s words come out fragmented, broken up by moans as Dejun doesn’t slow his pace. Jeno gets the picture, gently sliding out from under Jaemin so that Jaemin is laying back on the mattress and his head is by Jeno’s lap.

Dejun watches as Jeno presses his dick against Jaemin’s lips, his tongue darting out to flick at the slit before Jeno pushes into his waiting mouth.

Every time Dejun thrusts into Jaemin, Jaemin’s mouth slides deeper down Jeno’s shaft and holy fuck. He has enough wherewithal to wrap his free hand back around Jaemins cock, now that Jeno is busy, and hopes to god Jaemin is going to come soon because the scene in front of him alone is enough to make him want to lose it right then and there.

Dejun speeds up his hips, thrusting harder and deeper into Jaemin, who moans around Jeno’s cock. He grows frantic, trying to chase his release, feeling it stir in the pit of his stomach as Jaemin’s hole flutters around him.

Jaemin, I — oh,” Jeno squeezes his eyes shut, groaning as he drags Jaemin further onto his dick, making Jaemin gag a little, spit dripping down his chin. Dejun watches with wide eyes at how Jeno’s body freezes the second his orgasm washes over him, how his mouth drops open as he comes down Jaemin’s throat, and that’s all he needs to follow him down the edge, almost doubling over on top of Jaemin as his release hits him for the second time that night. 

He thinks he blacks out for a second, because when he comes to he sees Jaemin in front of him, come smeared across his mouth as his face creases in pleasure from where Jeno has snaked a hand in between them and is jerking him off. Moments later, he feels Jaemin come, warmth splattering across his chest as Jaemin goes boneless beneath him.

Dejun gingerly slips his cock out of Jaemin, collapsing on his back next to him. The room is filled with a chorus of their breathing as they all come down from their high. 

Absentmindedly, Dejun drags his fingers through Jaemin’s come on his chest, painting it into his skin as he stares at the ceiling and tries to regain control of his breath.

“Fuck, that was. So good,” Jaemin says next to him, before quietly repeating to himself, “fuck.”

He cranes his head to look at them and sees Jeno yawn, eyes slipping shut. Dejun carefully sits up, peeling the condom off his spent dick. 

“I’m gonna get some towels to clean us up, okay?” he tells them, Jaemin giving a tired thumbs up as he climbs out of bed on wobbly legs.

He wets a few of the soft towels in the bathroom, throwing the condom in the trash, and tries to wipe himself off the best he can. He’ll need to shower in the morning, but he is definitely not up to that right now, instead bringing clean towels back into the bedroom.

Once they’re all cleaned up, he throws the towels in the direction of the bathroom and collapses back into bed, somehow ending up in the middle again. Jaemin wraps himself around Dejun’s body and Jeno lazily plays with his fingers. His mind is blissfully calm.

He falls asleep like that, wrapped in the soft down comforter and two boys, their steady breathing floating around his head.

❄️❄️❄️❄️

Dejun wakes up in the middle of Jeno and Jaemin and gets a few minutes of peace before his brain skids to a halt and promptly decides it’s a perfect time to freak the fuck out.

What the fuck happened last night.

(He knows what happened. He slept with them, and it was amazing and wonderful and literally everything he could’ve wanted but now it’s morning and he doesn’t know what’s going on or why last night even occurred and he doesn’t know what to think.)

Dejun sits up in bed, his thoughts going a mile a minute. He has to figure out how to easily slip out of bed, so as to not disturb Jeno and Jaemin and maybe just — not be there when they wake up. Maybe they will just never talk about it! That sounds good too!

He feels an arm wrap around his waist, jolting him out of his head and pulling him back down against the mattress. Jeno pulls him in closer to his body, and Dejun goes still, trying not to move a muscle.

“I can hear you thinking from miles away, shhhh, it’s morning cuddle time now,” Jeno whispers into the voice of his neck. His voice is hoarse from sleep and it sounds so nice that Dejun wants to drown in it, but also, he fucked his boyfriend last night, and is deeply afraid to have ruined everything because they were too horny and a little tipsy in the hot tub and — 

“Dejun. Baby. Breathe please, you okay?” Jaemin’s voice comes out soft, and closer than he expected. He opens his eyes to see him looking at him with concern, having scooted closer on the bed so that his head rests on the same pillow.

Dejun takes a deep breath, trying to relax his shoulders, and figures he’s already naked, might as well be honest too.

“I’m just very, very stressed I managed to fuck all this up, like, you two are dating and I’m just… here, and I don’t really know what last night was, and this whole weekend has been really great but I feel like I’m losing my mind, so. Yeah.” He gets this all out in one breath, Jaemin not breaking eye contact with him as Jeno rubs soothing circles into his hip.

Jaemin crooks a smile at him, looking so soft and gorgeous in the morning light streaming in through the blinds that Dejun once again feels out of place.

“You did not fuck it all up. Yeah, Jeno and I are together, but — we like you, both of us, and we definitely wanted everything that happened last night. And I speak for both of us when I say we would love to do it again. And also we want to take you on a date. If you want, of course. We were really hoping you would want that, though.”

Jaemin looks so fucking hopeful and Dejun’s weak, gay heart stutters in his chest.

“What Jaemin said. We’ve wanted you, for a while now,” Jeno says softly behind him. “Whatever you’re comfortable with.”

Oh.

“That sounds,” Dejun says, exhaling, “all of that — it sounds. Really nice. A date would be nice. I would like that too.”

The look Jaemin gives him is almost too bright, too happy, and he feels the smile Jeno buries into the back of his neck. He turns over so he’s on his back and can look at the two of them, see the two beautiful boys he’s been harboring huge, obnoxious feelings for for months now smile down at him like he hung the moon.

Dejun laughs, breathless, scrubbing his palms down his face in delight.

“So, um, what… are we then?” Dejun asks the two of them. Jaemin looks down.

“Well, right now, we’re naked,” Jaemin says simply. Jeno groans, flicking him in the forehead.

“Jaemin, not the time, oh my god,” he scolds. Jaemin just laughs, bright, before throwing himself over them both, burying his face into Dejun’s neck. 

❄️❄️❄️❄️

Donghyuck calls them when they’re cuddled on the couch, enjoying the last couple hours before they have to head out. Jaemin answers, putting the phone on speaker. His fingers are messing with Dejun’s over their laps, and Jeno is curled up into his side, and Dejun has never felt more comfortable.

“Hey losers, hope you had absolutely no fun without me there,” Donghyuck says through the phone.

“Oh trust me, we had plenty of fun, didn’t we, Dejun?” Jaemin says, waggling his eyebrows at Dejun, who flushes and coughs awkwardly. There’s a pause, before Donghyuck continues.

“Wait. Wait hold on… did you…” Donghyuck trails off, and the silence he receives is enough of an answer for him. 

Dejun can hear the exact second Donghyuck loses it.

“Oh my god. When I told you guys to spice it up and get a third, I meant me. I WAS TALKING ABOUT ME. What the fuck!” Donghyuck shrieks into the phone. Jeno huffs a laugh into Dejun’s shoulder, as Jaemin hums, contemplatively.

“I mean, that could be arranged, still,” he says. 

Donghyuck starts sputtering incomprehensibly and Dejun’s mind skids to a complete halt, because, hold on, what?