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you are my happiness

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yoongi’s steps slow down to a halt in front of the door to his studio. his head unconsciously lolls to the side, a habit. did i leave the lights on?  he taps down the numbers of the studio’s passcode, 97—jeongguk’s year, 9—his month, then 933 for yoongi’s. the lock beeps and blinks twice, signaling the door is unlocked. 

 

stepping inside, yoongi looks around and notices someone is sitting hugging his legs, head on his knees, and sniffling softly. jeongguk, yoongi’s heart clenches. why is he crying? grabbing the door handle, he closes it shut, the lock beeps again. yoongi approaches jeongguk on the sofa on the corner of the studio, and sits beside him. 

 

“gguk-ah,” yoongi starts softly, “what happened? do you want to talk about it?” 

 

jeongguk sniffs, shakes his head a little. he exhales a shaky breath, and his shoulders start to shake. yoongi feels like he has been punched in the stomach. “okay, that’s alright,” he nods, “are you okay, baby?” he scoots closer to jeongguk, lifting one of his hand, before he stops mid-air and asks, “is it okay if i touch you?” 

 

the nod jeongguk gives yoongi is small, timid, but he notices. yoongi always does. putting his hand on the crown of jeongguk’s head, yoongi says, “you’re okay, gguk-ah. can you please look at hyung?” while rubbing jeongguk’s head softly. “i think i’ve forgotten how your cute face looks like, which is really bad.” yoongi gives him a smile, “i need my daily dose of jeonggukkie, i’m on low battery.” 

 

despite himself, jeongguk lets out a watery giggle, yoongi-hyung always knows how to make me smile, before finally lifting his head. his usually big, clear, doe eyes are now clouded with some clouds of sadness, making them bleak, but still pretty nonetheless. yoongi lets out a sigh, hands going up to cradle jeongguk’s face. “baby,” he says. 

 

a few tears escape jeongguk’s eyes when he blinks, which yoongi rubs away with his thumbs. “hi, yoongi-hyung,” jeongguk’s voice is a bit shaky, and he offers yoongi a little smile. yoongi accepts it, his lips stretching out into a smile matching jeongguk’s, but bigger. a grin. if jeongguk can’t smile right now, that’s okay, i’m going to do it for us

 

the minute smile on jeongguk’s face slowly disappears and turns into a pout, “how come you forget my face when we see each other everyday, hyung?” he asks yoongi. “i know you’re lying. because if you forget how i look,” jeongguk’s pout somehow gets more pronounced, “how can you still say that i’m cute?” 

 

yoongi lets out a chuckle. it’s always easy to talk to jeongguk. “well,” he replies, “i just know.” 

 

“okay…” jeongguk’s eyes squint, but yoongi can see the clouds in it are slowly disappearing. good

 

“okay, you got me. of course i can never forget your face, i lied.” he tells jeongguk. “only to make you smile, though, bun. and it worked.” yoongi presses a kiss to the tip of jeongguk’s nose, which makes a giggle escape jeongguk’s lips. yoongi loves the sound of it, pretty, pretty, pretty. he only wants jeongguk to smile and giggle and laugh everyday. “i love it when you laugh,” he confesses. “can’t you just laugh and be happy all the time?” 

 

shaking his head, jeongguk smiles, “no one can laugh all the time, yoongi-hyung.” his hands grab yoongi’s, “we’re humans. and humans cry,” replies jeongguk, his thumbs rubbing yoongi’s wrists. “it would be weird if we laugh all the time, right?” he sniffs, “like joker. poor joker.” 

 

that comment punches a snicker out of yoongi. “i guess you’re right. poor joker,” he agrees. “humans are mean.” 

 

“they are. but you’re so nice, though, hyung.” jeongguk looks at yoongi’s cat-like eyes. sitting this close, he can see yoongi’s long, pretty eyelashes. “you’re so nice to me.” closing his eyes. jeongguk wants to cry again. 

 

yoongi sees how jeongguk is starting to tear up, so he says, “that’s—” presses a kiss to jeongguk’s left eyelid, “—because—” then to his right, “—i love you too much,” and lastly to jeongguk’s nose once more. “i can be mean to you, if you want.” yoongi furrows his eyebrows, squinting his eyes and purses his lips. “do you want me to be mean, gguk-ah?” 

 

clearly, his attempt fails because after saying that, yoongi sees how jeongguk’s face breaks into a grin, growing bigger, bigger, then—finally, he hears the twinkling sound of jeongguk’s giggles. “hey, i’m trying to be mean here,” he scolds. “why are you laughing?” jeongguk’s giggles gradually turns louder and louder, into his usual boisterous laughter. 

 

i love the sound of you being happy, is what yoongi thinks instantly. he gazes at a cackling jeongguk, then he grins, big, and joins him. i only want happy times for us. for you. this feels nice, doesn’t it, gguk-ah? yoongi’s heart speaks. their laughters eventually die down, and yoongi asks jeongguk—carefully—“now that you’re feeling better, want to tell hyung why are you here crying?” 

 

“it’s nothing,” sighs jeongguk, “just had a bad day.” 

 

“mm, and why is that?” 

 

“i didn’t do so well when we were recording the song,” jeongguk mumbles, “we had to start over a couple of times because i kept messing up. i made everyone tired.” he looks down at his knees, avoiding yoongi’s concerned gaze. 

 

yoongi hums, encouraging jeongguk to go on—and he does. “the producer looked disappointed when we were done, i think i ruined the song, hyung.” 

 

putting his hand on jeongguk’s shoulder, yoongi gives jeongguk a gentle push towards himself, pulling him closer. jeongguk obliges, and rests his head on yoongi’s shoulder, closing his eyes. “gguk-ah,” yoongi starts, thumb moving to rub jeongguk’s upper arm, “i’m sure you did great. you always do, bun. and i’m not saying this because i’m your boyfriend, i mean it. this is a comment from producer min.”—jeongguk chuckles—“your head was messing with you, yeah? you always do well.” 

 

“but, hyung—” 

 

“i’m not done yet, baby,” yoongi softly cuts him off. “you are one of the most hardworking, talented, and the strongest people i know.” he stops, giving the top of jeongguk’s head a kiss. yoongi closes his eyes, mumbles into jeongguk’s hair, “you make the world a better place, angel. you make me want to be a better person.” 

 

jeongguk responds with a sniff, feeling the tears form again, and his chin quivers. yoongi continues, “i hope you are proud of yourself, little one, because i am. hyung is so proud of you. you are a gift to everyone. a gift i sometimes don’t want to share with someone else,” he stops to snicker, “i want to keep you to myself. how selfish of me. but, how can i not be, when you’re this amazing, huh?” 

 

“hyung, i’m crying again,” says jeongguk. and it’s true, when yoongi turns to look at him, he sees how jeongguk’s cheeks are wet, and the way his lips purse into a cute pout. yoongi goes to kiss it, causing the pout to disappear with the way jeongguk laughs. 

 

“happy tears only, i hope,” yoongi grins, “and it is okay to cry, gguk-ah. i read that crying is good for relieving your emotions. it’s okay to cry, but don’t do it alone.” he gazes at jeongguk, who is wiping his tears away with the back of his hand. “hyung will cry with you, baby. so, the next time you feel like crying—which i hope isn’t anytime soon, or, ever, actually—you call me, okay?” 

 

“mm,” is the response jeongguk gives. “i’m not alone now, though. you’re here with me.” 

 

yoongi's eyebrows furrow, “that is only because i saw the studio lights.” 

 

“i suppose so,” hums jeongguk, his head bobbing in a series of cute nods. 

 

“yes. so, promise, bun?”

 

giving yoongi a final nod, jeongguk finally says, “promise.” he continues, “but only if you promise you’ll do it too.” 

 

i love you so much, jeongguk. yoongi lets out a little laugh, promising him, “will do, sir.” 

 

“good.” 

 

as an afterthought, yoongi adds, “your happiness is my happiness, gguk-ah.” 

 

jeongguk grins, wide and pretty. “i thought that’s my line, hyung.” 

 

returning jeongguk’s grin, yoongi smiles, “okay, officer. then i’ll say mine.” he pretends to think, tilts his head and makes that sucking air noise, with jeongguk’s soft and hearty laughter in the background. “you know i love you, right?” 

 

“yoongi-hyung,” whines jeongguk—fond, fond, fond. “you overuse that line.”

 

“well, what can i say? it’s the truth.” 

 

jeongguk gives yoongi that bunny smile of his, the crinkles beside his eyes appearing. yoongi silently wishes for jeongguk to be able to wear this look all the time. happiness looks good on you, gguk-ah. letting out a cute huff, jeongguk retorts back, “i know. you know i love you, too, right, hyung?” 

 

the smile that stretches yoongi’s lips is the biggest one yet. “of course i do, little one,” he replies, then lifts his hand to tuck some of jeongguk’s hair to the back of his ear. “my pretty baby.” 

 

jeongguk blinks. “am i?” 

 

“are you what?” 

 

feeling his cheeks burn, jeongguk tucks his head into yoongi’s neck, mumbling, “your pretty baby.” he feels more than hears yoongi’s cackling laughter with the way yoongi’s shoulders shake. “yoongi-hyung,” he whines. 

 

yoongi ruffles jeongguk’s hair, finishes his cackles, and answers, “obviously. you are my prettiest baby. my one and only.” jeongguk removes his head from the crook of yoongi’s neck, focusing on his face. pouting, he says, “okay. you’ve ruined my hair,” and lets out a (most likely fake) sigh. “i’m not pretty anymore.” 

 

“that is the most absurd thing i’ve heard today,” is yoongi’s quick reply, “besides the you messed up thing, of course. you are pretty all the time. even when snoring while you sleep, guk-ah,” he grins. “ god, i love you too much.” 

 

“hey, my snoring isn’t that bad, okay,” jeongguk lightly slaps yoongi’s arm, “you’re lucky i love you too, so you only get a slap. if not, maybe i would’ve given you a punch for mocking my snoring.” 

 

“wow, so your love comes with privileges, i see.”

 

jeongguk chortles, “shut up, yoongi-hyung!” 

 

yoongi does, catching jeongguk’s lips with his. “now that the matter is solved, what do you want for dinner?” he asks, “i’m starving.” 

 

“mm, i want ramen.” 

 

“really, jeongguk? that’s what you chose when this amazing hyung can cook anything for you?” 

 

a guffaw leaves jeongguk, “okay, my amazing hyung,” he replies, “i’m making it easy for you.” i love you so much, yoongi-hyung

 

“if that so, then i shall thank you for your kindness, my prince.” yoongi is beaming, “shall i call your chariot to escort you to the kitchen, your highness?” 

 

jeongguk plays along, answers yoongi with a, “no need, my knight.” he giggles, “we can embark the journey on foot.” 

 

“as you wish, my little prince.” 


and so, to the kitchen they go, where it is soon filled with the smell of ramen noodles, laughter, and love, love, love.