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What we can't say

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1.

The first time they kissed, it tasted like winter, and the cold wind touched their cheeks.

Cordelia had needed to go find medicine for her mother that was not in the city, and she had not wanted to ask Alastair to go and get it for her. She felt that it was her responsibility, that it was something she needed to do herself because her brother had already taken too many responsibilities regarding their family. It was her turn now.

A carriage ride was too slow, so Cordelia had asked Matthew to take her in his new car. He was the only Shadowhunter that has the machine, as the Nephilim were always sturdy enough to start using mundane technology.

The ride was calm, Cordelia was watching him, noticing the concentration of his green eyes on the road. The curls of his hair ruffled in the wind, brushing his forehead, and Cordelia wanted to brush them away with her fingers and kiss his face.

She had been realizing what she was feeling. Matthew's closeness made her shiver, what she had once felt with James, now she was feeling it with him. But there was no comparison, because when James smiled at her, butterflies were what was in her stomach, it was a childhood infatuation and a longing that was accumulated over the years, and that now, with so much indifference, was starting to fade. But with Matthew it was completely different. it was fire.

With him, when he took her hand, she felt it burned. And Cordelia was delighted to realize that she liked to burn herself.

With Matthew it was born out of love, with him inviting her to go out, to dance, to chat. And it grew so much from inside her until it became such a strong feeling that Cordelia felt like she couldn't cope with it.

"We have a problem," Matthew said, pulling Cordelia out of her reverie. She looked up at him noticing the adorable way he wrinkled his nose.

"Did something happen?"

"We have spent three inns leaving after the city, but none of them has adapted their facilities." Cordelia realized what he was talking about. That was a disadvantage of using machinery that, although it had already been invented for some years, was still a luxury that only some could afford, therefore, the inns still did not make an effort to spend money to modify their facilities in something that only a few many customers would use.

"Oh. What shall we do?"

"Would it bother you sleeping in the car?" Matthew asked. "I paid Magnus Bane to glamorize it so we can sleep calmly as soon as we're out of town," he explained. Cordelia sighed, she had never done anything like this, she began to think about what her mother would say about the situation, it was to spend the night with a man who, above of all, was not her fiancé, in a space as closed as a car was.

However, on second thought, they should have pretended to be married at the inn, since they would never give him a room if they weren't.

"Okay," Cordelia replied. Matthew refocused on the road and Cordelia continued to watch him. It was somehow mesmerizing.

Matthew looked askance at her and smiled.

"Contemplating the panorama, Miss Carstairs?" He asked. Cordelia giggled.

"A bit. Sometimes you make a very ugly face when you're distracted." Matthew wrinkled his nose, then giggled, and Cordelia's heart skipped a beat. "Matthew, can you stop?" She asked. He shot her a worried look.

"Did something happen?" Cordelia shook her head.

"No, I just want to stretch my legs," She replied. Matthew quickly nodded and stopped. They were already on the outskirts of the city. Cordelia left Cortana in the back chair and opened the door to go out, clutching her coat to her body. Matthew followed her, standing beside her, also sheathed in his coat. Both under the starry sky outside London, they leaned against the car, observing the green landscape in front of them. The cold winter wind hit them, but Cordelia felt the heat in Matthew's body beside her. She leaned back against him, feeling him tense. She had seen him, noticed how Matthew looked at her as she passed by, how his hands were sweating when he took hers, or the way he spoke to her.

Cordelia had never taken the initiative in anything when it came to romance, men were supposed to be the ones who had to woo her , but she knew that Matthew would not, especially because of her commitment to James. But in those moments, Cordelia erased James from her memory. She ignored the thought that what she was about to do was wrong, that it was not correct . That she as a lady should not even start it.

She ignored all those thoughts, covering Matthew's hand with her own, and when he turned to look at her with that softness in his green eyes, she caressed his cheek and stood on tiptoe to kiss him.

Matthew's lips were cold from the wind that enveloped them and tasted like winter. But the feeling that began to run through her was hot, and Matthew's hands were warm when he pressed against to his own body, deepening the kiss. She felt him sigh as if this kiss was something he had been longing to do long ago, and yes, it was. And she knew it because she also had that feeling in her chest.

When they parted their mouths for air, Cordelia sighed, her hands still against Matthew's chest and his arms around her.

They sighed together. Matthew's lips made contact with her forehead and Cordelia closed her eyes at the comfort of the situation and the soft heartbeat of Matthew tapping on her chest.

"This is wrong ..." Matthew whispered and Cordelia's throat tightened. She knew it, also he, but why they couldn't be apart now? Why did they want to be forever in each other's arms?

"I know," Cordelia sighed. She listened to Matthew inhale deeply, as if fearing what she might say to him. "But I feel so good here… next to you." Matthew sighed. He tightened his hold on her.

.

They had slept together in the back of the car. Cordelia on Matthew as if they were born to fit perfectly.

They had returned to their journey and shared new furtive kisses, each tasting better than the other. The lap was faster.

"How was your trip?" Alastair's voice, when she walked through the door of her house after midnight the day after she had started the journey, made her frighten.

"How's Mom?" Cordelia asked. Alastair shrugged, there were questions in his dark eyes that Cordelia didn't want to answer.

"She´s fine" replied his brother. Cordelia nodded, took the paper bag with the medicines, and went to cross the wall that was Alastair.

"I'll bring Risa the medicine," she said but was stopped by the boy. Cordelia and Alastair looked at each other. Her heartbeat fast with fear.

"Are you okay?" His brother asked him. Cordelia understood that what was in her brother's eyes was fear. He was afraid that Matthew, because of his constant drunkenness, would be a danger to Cordelia in that car. But Cordelia smiled at him, trying to reassure him.

"Yes, I'm okay."

.

2.

The ballroom was awash with laughter and light. It was as if nothing had ever happened, as if demons didn't lurk every night in London. Sure, there were adult shadowhunters on patrol, and Will was on the lookout for any calls. But it was New Year's Eve, and the institute had arranged to give a dance.

Cordelia had danced a lot, with James, with her brother, with her future father-in-law, with the other Merry Thieves ... Except with Matthew. She knew it, he had tried to limit his touch in public since apparently it was too obvious how they felt for each other. And in those moments Cordelia was missing him since he had disappeared from everyone’s sight.

Cordelia could see that, although she wanted to look strong, Charlotte had concern on her face. James had told her that Matthew argued with his mother only the day before.

"I'll go look for him in the game room," James said.

"I'll look up in other rooms," said Thomas. Then they walked away. Cordelia decided to include herself and go looking for him too. She could feel the throbbing of her worried heart in her ears. She noted that everyone felt the same, they were also concerned about Matthew. .

She went downstairs, knowing that if someone did not want to be found, They would hide in places where others would never look for them, so Cordelia went to the crypt of the institute, she hoped that he had not used the portal, otherwise it would be difficult to find him.

She heard it before she saw it. She heard soft sobs, from someone who had been hiding his pain and crying so that no one else would hear him.

She saw him sitting on the floor behind what had once been his father's desktop. His blond hair was messy as if he had constantly run his fingers through the strands. His face was resting on his knees and his hands were shaking, gripping his pants. There was an almost empty wine bottle next to him. Cordelia's heart clenched, and she knuckled at the desktop, stopping Matthew's cry.

The blonde raised his head, his beautiful face was full of tears and his eyes were red.

"Cordelia," he murmured. His voice was hoarse, no doubt sore from so much crying. Cordelia walked towards him carefully, although Matthew did not have fits of fury when he was drunk, sometimes he would get upset by the proximity if it was very unexpected. She knelt beside him and reached out her hand. Matthew watched as she stroked his cheek, and closed his eyes with a sigh. He rested his cheek on Cordelia's hand and seemed to melt.

"What happened, Matthew?" Cordelia asked, getting closer to him. Her hand still resting on his cheek, Matthew turned his face and kissed her hand.

"Nothing that your heart should worry about, my dear Cordelia," he replied. Cordelia frowned.

"Only I know what I should worry about," she replied, patting him lightly on the cheek. Matthew looked at her, his green eyes full of pain. "And you, Matthew, you worry me."

"I don't deserve it, Cordelia," he murmured, and Cordelia bit her lip.

"Is it because of the argument you had with your mother?" Matthew frowned and moved away from Cordelia's touch. He reached for the bottle that had been by his side, but Cordelia quickly took it from him and placed it behind her. Matthew frowned. "Matthew, answer me," She demanded. Matthew muttered something Cordelia didn't hear and looked away. "Please ... You know you can't pretend to be okay with me, Matthew. I know you." She stroked his cheek again. "I know you are not okay."

"Yes, it was because of the discussion I had yesterday with my mother," Matthew replied bitterly. "She was worried about me, but I told her that nothing happened. And she was angry. My mom is very stubborn, she wanted me to tell her what was going on, but I didn't want to. And she yelled at me. And I yelled at her. And then Charles yelled at me. And then Dad yelled at us. It was chaos ... Mom ended up going to her office, I'm sure she was crying. All because of me."

"It isn't ..."

"Cordelia, please. It was my fault." She frowned and stood up, Matthew watched her, his cheeks red from the alcohol in his blood. Cordelia held out her hand.

"Come, I'll take you to sleep." Matthew took her hand, but pulled her, making Cordelia fall into his lap.

Up close, she could feel the sweet scent of alcohol on him. Matthew's hand, as always, burned on her skin.

Matthew brushed his lips with hers as if asking for permission because even being drunk, and although they had kissed a lot of times before, he always expected her to accept.

Cordelia kissed him and he deepened the kiss by wrapping his fingers in her red hair.

Tears and alcohol gave kisses a strange touch. Not that Cordelia complained, but it gave her a pain in the chest to think about it. She placed her hands on his face as the kiss grew hotter, as she felt Matthew's grip on her thigh tighten.

With all her willpower, she pulled him apart.

"Come on, you must go to sleep. Everyone is looking for you." Matthew sighed and rested his face on Cordelia's neck.

"If it was up to me, my dear, I would stay here, sunk in my misery. But your love gives me the strength to get up, at least this time." And he released her. Cordelia got up and took him by the hand to lead him upstairs. Matthew tripped over one of the steps and Cordelia took it. The boy quickly walked away from her. "I don't want you to carry me."

Cordelia said nothing more.

.

Matthew had fallen asleep right away when he touched the bed. He had only managed to remove his jacket and shoes. Cordelia knew that he drank to coping with what was happening, but even so, her mind went directly to her father, making her heart hurt too much.

She was leaving the room when she heard Lucie's call.

"Daisy!" The girl called. Cordelia was grateful that her dark skin did not allow her blush to show through. She turned to see her parabatai.

"Yes?"

"Bridget saw you with Matthew," She said, then signaled at the door of the room.

"Yes, I took him to sleep ... He's not very well," Lucie sighed, placing her hand on her cheek.

"I care about his health," the girl sighed. "Wish I could do something for him."

Cordelia bit her lip, the desire to say that she also wanted to help him was intense. But she preferred to keep him quiet by looking askance at the door.

"Oh, my dear Matthew," She thought. "I would like to know what I can do to save your heart."

.

3.

"You know, Mr. Fairchild," said Cordelia, taking his hand and getting out of the car. "I'm going to have to forbid you to keep giving me gifts."

Matthew smiled, his gaze mesmerized on the bronze dress Cordelia wore. Matthew didn't mind giving her gifts, he loved doing it. He liked to spend on his friends and, above all, now on Cordelia.

"I saw this design and thought you would like it." He made her do a spin and Cordelia giggled.

"I just love it," she replied. She accepted the invitation to take his arm and they went to the entrance of the theater. "But I don't want you to keep spending money on me. You know you don’t have to do that to earn my appreciation." Matthew smiled, and felt butterflies on his chest at the girl's smile. Cordelia's red hair was loose, falling down her shoulders, toning her beautiful brown skin. She was looking at him with an expression that Matthew knew what it meant, he was also looking at her with that same expression.

They made their way to the seats to wait for the concert to begin.

The truth, Matthew was not even paying attention to it, he was only preparing to contemplate Cordelia. To observe her attentive eyes on stage and her lips in a smile. Matthew remembered the taste of those lips. Right now he wanted to flood into them, to feel the taste of Cordelia, and her warmth over him that produced thousands of sensations.

Feelings of pleasure that he felt he should not have with Cordelia, because she was not just any lover. Cordelia had plunged so deep into his heart and so quickly that it seemed impossible. But it was possible, that feeling of falling in love so deep that was intensifying just by looking at her.

And when he kissed her… it was a feeling of tranquility that flooded him, as if he knew his place was to be there, with his lips on hers. It was to immerse himself in a delicious sensation. Kissing Cordelia felt like he was drinking the wine that his blood asked for.

Matthew wanted to kiss her right now, no matter how many people were watching, but he held himself back so much.

He settled by taking her hand between the chairs. Cordelia looked at their hands and then looked at him, gave him a soft smile and Matthew felt that he could die at that right moment.

And he would die happy.

It dawned on him that he loved her.

And maybe he didn't even deserve her.

.

Cordelia's lips were always soft against his. When they kissed, Matthew forgot everything. All of his problems were in the background because of the moments when he was inundated with the wonderful drug that was Cordelia Carstairs. 

She, for the first time, groaned in his ear and Matthew trembled with pleasure at the sound. He had never heard it and, by the angel, right now he wanted to hear it more than ever.

His hands were tucked under Cordelia's dress, caressing her legs over the stockings. When they were together, when they burned in forbidden pleasure, there were no inhibitions. There was no thought that what they were doing was wrong. They just did it, because they felt they needed to, that they needed to express what they were feeling through kisses, through the touch on the other's skin.

Because it was difficult to say it through words without realizing all the background there was, all the lies they kept, all the secrets they had.

So when Matthew started kissing Cordelia's neck, she stroking his hair while continued on his legs, that she spoke those words… he was paralyzed.

He knew what he felt. He knew that she must feel the same. But having Cordelia saying it…

They parted, she looked beautiful, still flushed on her brown skin, with her matted red hair, Matthew was speechless.

"Matthew?" Cordelia called. He imagined that she expected him to answer the same. But Matthew couldn't do it.

Reality hit him.

What the fuck was he doing? Was he seriously kissing his parabatai's fiancée so passionately? Did he love who would marry the other person he loved the most in the world? He felt agitated.

"Matthew! Take it easy. You don't have to tell me back," she said, lowering herself from his legs and sitting next to him in the back seat of the car.

"You shouldn't ..." Matthew murmured. Cordelia frowned. "You shouldn't love me."

"But I do." Matthew felt agitated. It was not the first time. Damn, they had kissed a lot, they had gone out, he had noticed how she looked and smiled at him. It was obvious. But why was he upset now that she was telling it to him so explicitly? Why? Why was he afraid that she would love him and tell him?

"I don't deserve it," he murmured, looking at Cordelia with bright green eyes. She looked up at him with dark eyes full of love.

Damn, why? Why when Matthew felt on the cusp of happiness, that monster in his chest arose to pull him to the bottom again?

Damn, he needed a drink, but he didn't drink while driving.

Cordelia noticed he was altered and took him from the cheeks.

"It hurts that you say that," she replied. "It hurts that you suggest that I shouldn't love you when I do. It hurts that you think you don't deserve it when you are the person who most deserves to be loved in the world."

"Oh, my sweet Cordelia." Matthew brushed a strand of hair from her cheek. "If you knew all the secrets I keep, you will lose your affection for me. You will realize how bad person I am and you will stop loving me, just as I love you." Cordelia pressed her forehead to his, closed her eyes brushing his nose. She kissed him softly on the lips.

"Tell me, Matthew. What is that dark abyss from which you do not stop staggering and soon you will fall into?" Matthew took Cordelia's hands between his.

"You are an angel, my beautiful Cordelia. But I don't want to drag you into that abyss. You do not deserve it."

"Maybe I want to fall next to you. Or just hold your hand to keep you from falling."

"There will be people who don't deserve to be saved," He murmured. Cordelia sighed and began to kiss him gently around the mouth and then on the cheek. Then on the forehead.

"We all deserve to be saved."

.

Leaving Matthew had been painful for Cordelia. He had told her everything, through tears, crying as a lost child and Cordelia hugged him. He didn't want to leave her side, but it was getting late.

Cordelia wanted to hug him, kiss him, tell him that she loved him and that he did deserve to be loved. But it was difficult. She saw how darkness sometimes flooded Matthew and although she wanted to illuminate him many times, he told her that he was afraid to take her to the darkness with him.

Cordelia found that somehow, she didn't mind following him.

Before opening the door to her house, it opened suddenly and she stumbled against Thomas Lightwood's strong chest.

Cordelia watched him, agitated and nervous, who smiled at him.

"Cordelia!" He greeted "How was the concert?" Cordelia avoided blushing. Shrugged.

"In the end, it was just Matthew and me. James had something to do." It wasn't a lie, the boy had canceled at the last minute." And you ...? I didn't think to see you here." Thomas chuckled nervously and scratched his arm.

"I ... I was discussing things with your brother. But I must go," he said, walking away quickly. Cordelia watched as he crossed the gate and was lost in the street.

Inside the house, her brother also looked at her nervously.

She decided not to inquire.

.

4.

When Matthew slept, he seemed to have an enormous calm on his face. Cordelia noticed that the wrinkle that remained on his forehead was softening and his snoring was soft.

From the closeness Cordelia had on the sofa, she could see his golden lashes adorn his cheekbones. She could notice the mole that adorned his temple and the very soft freckles on his cheeks. The freckles were so clear that only in good light they could be seen.

They had a meeting in the library with the other boys and with Lucie. But a moment came when everyone separated. Christopher went down to the crypt, Thomas went out on patrol and Lucie went up to her room with the excuse that she felt tired. They had stayed with James, but he had received a letter that made him apologize and leave.

Matthew and Cordelia had watched him go, clearly knowing whose letter it was. She was impressed that James didn't show at least some discretion. But who was she to judge? Above all, with what she did.

They had stayed together, Cordelia offered to read to him and Matthew accepted. She looked him tired, with shadows under his eyes and messy blonde hair. Before long, the softness of Cordelia's voice made him sleep.

And now she could stay by his side, watching him.

From the first time she saw him, she noticed how beautiful he was. It was impossible not to notice the attractiveness that Matthew had. He glowed like a light when he appeared in a room, but it was amazing how there was a contrast to his interior.

How under that light there was a darkness eating away at his soul. She did not remember the exact point when she had begun to fall in love. She just remembered being close to him and feeling how everything burned inside her when he even touched her hand. Or how it felt like she drank from a spring every time they kissed.

There was a jumble all over her body when he was around, and Cordelia didn't have to be very resourceful to know how much in love she felt.

Cordelia reached out and gently brushed one of the blonde curls from Matthew's forehead. 

She could see his eyes fluttering inside his eyelids. She lowered her fingers, stroking his eyes, his lashes, and then his cheeks.

Sometimes it seemed to her that Matthew was made of porcelain and gold. He had features as delicate as a doll's and when he slept, she could see them at their best. And their skins made such a beautiful contrast that Cordelia loved it.

She ran her fingers over his chin, feeling the slight roughness of an unshaven beard. And then it rose to his lips, they were chapped due to so many times that Matthew bit them.

She could feel when his lips pursed and kissed her fingers, and Cordelia looked up to see Matthew's eyes, though closed, not moving, implying that he was awake.

"Hey ..." she greeted, turning her hands to his cheek.

"Hey…" Matthew greeted, opening his eyes.

"You look exhausted."

"I am," Cordelia frowned.

"Did you have to patrol late?" she asked.

"More or less," Matthew replied. He reached out and took Cordelia's hair in a lock.

"What happens?" Matthew closed his eyes.

"I just can't sleep sometimes," he said.

"Why?" Matthew made a little noise and tangled his fingers in Cordelia's hair. He pulled her gently to him to flood her with a kiss.

"That doesn't matter," he murmured and went to kiss her, but Cordelia, annoyed, separated.

"No, of course it matters." She heard him give a little growl and she felt annoyed. "Everything that happens to you, I care about it. Matthew, haven't you thought to talk to your parents about the accident?"

"No, Cordelia. They won't understand me. They are going to blame me because I always shit on everything."

"No! Your parents love you, they will understand. Maybe if you tell James first, he'll help you to tell your parents." Matthew looked away.

"James is the one I least want to know. I don't want him to know what a monster I am."

Cordelia sighed. She pressed her forehead to Matthew's with a sigh.

"You are not a monster, Matthew. Stop believing it, because if you were, I wouldn't love you."

Matthew gave her a sad smile and brought their lips together in a soft kiss. It was a short, comforting kiss, filled with longing and hope.

"Come with me, my sweet Cordelia. Stay by my side when I tell him, so if he rejects me, I will know that you, who already know everything and did not reject me, will be by my side."

Cordelia ran her fingers through Matthew's curls.

"Sure, I'll stay."

The library door opened and they parted instantly with their heart racing. When they looked at the door, they noticed that Christopher was coming, with his head nailed to the notebook that he had in his hands, writing down something quickly.

When he raised his head, who saw them, he smiled.

"Matthew, Cordelia, I thought you were gone with the others," he said innocently, not noticing the discomfort or how hot the atmosphere was.

Matthew smiled tenderly at Christopher and she felt a warmth in her chest. The smile with which Matthew addressed all of his friends was so beautiful that she loved it so much.

"Cordelia was kindly reading to me. What were you working on, Kit?" Christopher's lavender eyes sparkled and he sat across from them to explain everything.

Cordelia noticed Matthew's green eyes follow Christopher's movements fondly. She understood the fear that encompassed him, the terror of losing those he loved.

She saw him nod at something Christopher was saying and smile again.

She never wanted that smile to be lost.

.

Matthew was crying again, after revealing his secret.

But it wasn't in her arms.

It was in James's that they squeezed him, that his hands caressed his blond curls and murmured words of comfort in Welsh and English.

Matthew cried in the arms of one of the people he loved the most in the world, and would soon cry in his parents' because James had told him that it would be the best to go with them.

Cordelia had come to support Matthew and had taken his hand before he told James the truth.

But now she felt like an intruder, sitting on the couch across from them, noticing the beautiful bond they both shared. And that she was afraid it would break.

.

+1.

Matthew's apartment wasn't too far from Hell Ruelle where they'd arranged to meet Anna that night. It was on a second floor above a clothing store that Cordelia was sure Matthew loved.

"I recently saw a dress that I'm sure you would love," he said as they walked up the stairs. Cordelia smiled, their hands were together.

"Yes, but this time I will buy it with my money. I'm older now, Matthew. I already earn my salary." Matthew giggled.

"Well, well"

As soon as Matthew opened the door to the apartment, Oscar jumped on his master, totally excited as if it had taken years instead of hours. And then, forgetting Matthew, he headed toward Cordelia, wagging his tail.

"You can sit down while I look for my coat," Matthew asked, pointing to a sofa. Cordelia nodded and still with Oscar on her heels, she went to sit down as Matthew disappeared behind a door. They had arranged to meet Anna at Infernal Pier, Cordelia had given her mother the excuse to go have tea with the older girl again.

Cordelia stroked Oscar's soft fur before he went to lie down in a corner of the living room. She looked in detail at the small flat, a beautifully decorated sitting room, and a kitchen divided by a bar. There was only one door leading to Matthew's room, Cordelia guessed that it was the bathroom door.

On the table in front of the sofa where she was sitting, Cordelia observed a photograph. She took it to observe it well.

Sitting in a wheelchair was Henry Fairchild; at his side, with a firm countenance, the consul who placed her hand on the shoulder of a boy of about eleven years; the boy had a serious face, like his mother's; on Henry's legs was a four-year-old boy, who, unlike the rest of his family, was smiling.

Cordelia smiled, looking at the photograph. It was framed in a silver frame, which was adorned with an F and two fairy wings.

"Not the best photo, but I wanted to bring me one," Matthew said, leaving the room. Cordelia put the photo back on the table.

"You looked adorable," Cordelia told him. Matthew raised an eyebrow and sat next to her, leaving the coat he had come to find on the arm of the sofa.

"Did I?" Cordelia giggled and shrugged.

"Well, now you don't see adorable. Rather beautiful."

"Oh, what a way to flatter me, Miss Carstairs." Cordelia giggled again. "I would love to see pictures of you as a child, you should look adorable." Cordelia grimaced.

"I'd doubt that a bit. But mom would be very happy to show it. She loves to embarrass me." Matthew reached up and took a red curl from Cordelia's hair to run behind her ear. Then the hand gently stroked her chin.

"Why would you hesitate? If you are the most beautiful person I have ever known."

Cordelia's cheeks were painted a soft red. Matthew often went out with those things that made her heartbeat with enormous speed.

Matthew's hand burned on her skin. Cordelia closed her eyes enjoying the touch. Matthew's thumb touched her bottom lip and she tried to take a deep breath, then felt the soft lips of who his fiancé's parabatai was.

The atmosphere felt hotter than usual, maybe it was the realization that she was in a man's apartment, but Cordelia didn't mind. She plunged deeper into that soft kiss that was somehow getting hotter.

The boy's hands on her shoulders burned, blazed, but Cordelia didn't care. She wanted to burn there with him.

Their bodies were desired.

They parted for air and, as always when they finished, the heaviness in their chest settled.

"Oh, my sweet Cordelia ..." Matthew whispered. And Cordelia closed her eyes. He said her name in such a beautiful way, it had a connotation in his voice that made her tremble from head to toe.

She did not want to part with him. Going home or the institute, pretending to be happy about the false commitment she had. Pretend to be happy because James, someone she now believed to love, loved someone else.

Matthew was the only real thing she had now.

"Matthew," she called. "Kiss me," She asked. Matthew accepted and kissed her again. And in Cordelia's mind, only Matthew's name was repeated.

Matthew, sincerely loving her.

Matthew, wishing her.

Matthew, so beautiful and soft, kissing her as if the world was ending.

Matthew, whom Cordelia never believed she came to love and now loved him.

As if they had been destined from the start.

Matthew's lips touched her neck and she felt like she was going to drown. Her hands acted so instinctively that Cordelia didn't even notice when it went to Matthew's shirt to start undoing the buttons. Matthew's lips trailed over her chin with soft kisses until her hands stopped gently. He pulled away from a little and ignoring Cordelia's frustrated sound looked her in the eye.

"Cordelia ..." He took her hand, gently removing the glove and then raising her knuckles to his lips. "Do you want this?"

There was a desire in Cordelia's dark eyes and strange despair. As if she longed to be touched and Matthew knew it, but they had stopped the other times, apparently this time they wouldn't. This time, they seemed to be plunging into each other's bodies in that absolute desire that had been engulfing them for a long time. There she was, wanting to be touched by him.

For those dirty and sinful hands.

Cordelia's hand caressed his lips.

"Yes," she replied. Matthew soon picked her up, scooped her up, and carried her into the room.

He left her on the bed and kissed her again, this time with more passion. There was a softness in between; Matthew was very passionate about his lovers, but with Cordelia he was different. With Cordelia, he felt he required softness and delicacy as if he was reading poetry. Show her all his affections with actions.

Cordelia returned to his shirt as Matthew gently stroked her legs over the skirts of the dress and gently kissed her neck.

She finished removing the buttons from his shirt and Matthew finished removing it. Cordelia looked at him with bright eyes, her hair was a halo of blood on the silk sheets. She ran her fingers through the runes, as if staring at them, and ran her fingers through Matthew's blond curls. He turned to her, gently kissing her face and sliding his fingers over her figure, caressing the fabric.

He growled in despair, knowing he had to find the laces of the dress behind her, took Cordelia by the waist, and lifted her to sit her on his lap causing her to giggle.

They looked at each other, there was a softness in their eyes and Matthew could see something else. Something he couldn't identify but it was so beautiful.

They gently joined their lips, kissing delicately as his hands, really expert, untied the laces of her dress.

Cordelia let out a groan of satisfaction as his hands went to the back of the dress, dipping under her bodice and caressing her bareback.

She knew that tonight she would see the sky.

Matthew's cold hands contrasted with her warm skin. Cordelia gave a small growl on the blonde's lips when one of the rings scratched her.

Matthew, realizing, only left her body to remove the rings from his fingers and throw them on the ground. The metallic sound they made on the floor was music to Cordelia's ears.

Matthew's lips spread soft kisses on her chin and neck as Cordelia pulled the top of her dress down over her shoulders and then she could hear Matthew sigh.

He parted, his green eyes watching her as he slid his hands up and draped her bodice over her head. The hair tickled her bareback and breasts as curls fell over them. The cool night air came in through the small slot in the window and hit her in the chest.

Cordelia caught her nakedness for the first time, and she intended to cover herself under Matthew's watchful, eager gaze.

He seemed to be speechless, staring at her breasts as if he hadn't seen a pair of these before.

Matthew's hands floated to her breasts, and when they came closer they did so softly that Cordelia sighed.

Matthew's fingers tickled and Cordelia stifled a moan as the boy's thumbs made contact with her nipples.

Matthew moved them again, leaving Cordelia under him again and beginning to move. When Matthew's hot mouth wrapped around a nipple, Cordelia moaned in surprise. However, then came a feeling of pleasure never before felt.

She wrapped her hand in the blonde curls as she was cared for, while the lips and fingers played with her body and gave her many sensations never felt before. And now she felt so full.

Matthew's hands were magical, and his mouth was even more so. He took care of her breasts while Cordelia kept letting out sounds because she had no idea how sensitive her breasts could be. And the boy's hands were going elsewhere. 

Cordelia had been so submerged in the caresses that she hadn't noticed when Matthew had discarded the rest of the dress leaving her naked.

There was a single moment of embarrassment, totally tiny, that Cordelia threw away from her thoughts as she watched the boy kiss her belly, brushing the runes and leaving small and soft bites all over her skin as he ventured further down.

Cordelia did not ask, did not question, because her mind was so clouded that she did not care what Matthew's hands and experienced mouth did to her.

She just trusted those bright green eyes that told her everything was going to be fine, that she just closed her eyes.

And she will dedicate herself to enjoy.

.

Cordelia never thought that a person's body had so many sensations that it would lead to full ecstasy. She had screamed with pleasure, she had felt in the sky at Matthew's hands on her. So many I love you had been said in bed that Cordelia had it etched in her memory.

And even though her core ached a little due to her virtue lost, she didn't care because Matthew's infatuated gaze beneath her was everything to her soul.

She was exhausted. Her body ached and her eyes were heavy.

She was lying on Matthew, the boy's soft hands caressing her back and playing with her hair. 

The sheets only covered their waists and Cordelia brushed with her fingers each of the dark marks that decorated Matthew's chest, making him smile.

The room was illuminated and in light of it, due to the closeness, Cordelia could see that in addition to his cheeks, Matthew's shoulders were also decorated with soft freckles.

Cordelia caressed them and spread soft kisses on them.

The silence was so comfortable.

"Would you stay to sleep?" Matthew asked, wrapping a red curl around his finger. "We already missed our date with Anna."

"Yes," Cordelia replied. She didn't care about anything, or what she would say to her mother, or Lucie, or even James. She didn't care about her reputation, nothing. Just to feel Matthew's heart beating in her ears, as she was hearing it now. She remembered seeing him sleeping in the library, and suddenly the feeling that she would see him now, sleeping in bed, gave her warmth in her chest.

"Good," Matthew said with a smile, caressing Cordelia's waist. He lowered her, but before Cordelia could reply, he was already wrapping her in a hug.

Cordelia sighed.

She clung to Matthew's body. She clung to his heat and scent.

She had the feeling that she wanted this forever.

.

"By the angel!" That exclamation made them wake up. Matthew looked at his door and cursed under his breath. Cordelia took the sheet, covered herself, and turned around, awaiting the impending disaster.

The figure in the doorway was tall, had dark hair, and looked at the two of them with wide blue eyes.

Anna.

"Anna," Matthew choked. "I can…"

Anna shut him up with a wave of her hand.

"Get changed, I'll wait in the living room," and she stomped out of the room.

"Damn it," Matthew growled and stood up, intending to change. Cordelia was still paralyzed in bed, but Matthew had no intention of rushing her at any time. "I will deal with Anna," Matthew said softly, wrapping himself in a green robe and tying his belt. Cordelia felt her heart in her throat.

She nodded.

Matthew left the room and closed the door again.

All the courage she had experienced the night before was gone, and now she was scared.

.

Anna and Matthew had the habit of entering each other's apartment without even touching. It was not the first time that Anna had caught him in such a situation, just as there had been times when Matthew had caught Anna.

The point is that now it was not just any lover.

It was Cordelia.

And Matthew was surely certain that Anna believed he was playing with her. And Anna had a huge weakness for Cordelia.

Anna was cross-legged on his sofa, wearing a dark suit that made her look colder than normal. Her blue eyes were dark and furious.

Matthew understood that it was not just for Cordelia, but James.

"This, Matthew Fairchild," Anna growled, "is the last straw."

"I can explain it ..." 

"Explain, what? What did you sleep with your parabatai's fiancée? How do you play with the heart of an innocent girl? I believed you were more than this, Matthew." Matthew felt flush. He was relieved that Anna did not judge Cordelia, that she did not blame her. He would have to lie to save Cordelia's reputation. He preferred that Anna, and subsequently all the Herondale and Lightwood believed that he was a wicked man and severed all ties with him, to the knowledge that Cordelia did not respect future marriage vows.

He didn't mind making everyone stop appreciating him if he could save her. Similarly, everyone knew that he was a lousy person.

"You're right, I don't have to explain it," he replied, averting his gaze from Anna's cold blue eyes. "I took advantage of it last night when we drank. You know how I am, as soon as I drink I like to lift skirts."

Anna opened her mouth, surprised, and amazed by Matthew's attitude. And Cordelia's voice interrupted them.

"Matthew!" She exclaimed. Still wrapped in the silk sheet, Cordelia stood at the door of his room, Matthew noted how beautiful she looked. Her tangled red hair on her dark skin. She looked at Anna and felt herself tremble. "Anna, Matthew didn't take advantage of me. I was fully aware of what I was doing.".

"And would you be interested in explaining why you ended up like this?" Matthew and Cordelia looked at each other, then at Anna.

"My engagement to James is false," Cordelia confessed. "I didn't spend the night with him that time, I just said it so your aunt would stop accusing him. And he asked me to marry just to save my reputation. We'd last a year married and then get divorced." Anna was still frowning, but noting the sincerity in Cordelia's eyes, she softened.

"James is in love with Grace Blackthorn," said Matthew this time. Anna was confused. She knew the look of love and was sure that James had feelings for Cordelia. She looked at the couple who still looked nervous, Cordelia clung to the silk sheet feeling shame and scolded herself. How could she not have noticed that Matthew and Cordelia loved each other? She remembered the times she saw them, the glances she noticed being thrown or the time she had seen sideways how they were holding hands.

It was so remarkable now.

She sighed.

"I don't know how to proceed at this," Anna said, looking at them. "It is quite obvious that there are feelings between both of you, and you," She looked at Cordelia. "You saved James from the accusations of my crazy Aunt Tatiana. But I don't know the full deal on this whole matter."

Cordelia blushed. Anna knew very well that the deal was not that both, she and James, could have separate relationships.

"James doesn't know about you, does he?" She saw the pallor in Matthew and sighed. "You both owe me a favor. I will keep this secret for you, but you must promise to stand firm, at least until you discuss it with James. You are his parabatai." She referred to Matthew. "Don't hurt him."

They both nodded. Anna sighed and looked towards the door.

"If you're asked, you spent the night at my house," said Anna. "I will cover only this one, and you," she looked at Matthew, "You are indebted to me." She got up and started to go to the door. "I suggest you go away, if Cordelia's mother asks about her in the institute, and they do a tracking rune, I don't think you want her to be found here."

And she came out.

Matthew and Cordelia were silent for a time, looked at each other, and went into the room. Cordelia sat on the bed as she watched Matthew pick up the things he had left on the floor. Her dress, his clothes, his rings. She noticed when he put them on and was looking at one.

Then he sat down next to her. There was not much to say, the momentary sense of pleasure crumbling as reality fell upon them.

"Do you think we should tell James?" Matthew asked. Cordelia trembled. The fear of disappointing James still stuck in her bones. However, she noticed that Matthew was shaking more. He feared what his parabatai might tell him.

"Disloyalty haunts me," Cordelia said with a lump in her throat. How could she have denied James going on with Grace if she had her sneaky encounters with Matthew? Although somehow, there was a little pixie of resentment on her shoulder, telling her that James was not being honest, that he was also going out to see Grace. Sometimes she felt that all of this was to feel good about herself.

"Cordelia ..." She heard the softness in his voice tickling her. She looked at him and noticed that he was looking at one of his rings. She noticed the F marked on the ring, surrounded by wings. "Marry me," he blurted out, looking up, green eyes on her. Something choked in Cordelia's throat. She watched the Fairchild ring being offered, as the Herondale ring weighed on her finger. It caught her off guard, but that's how hand requests should be, right? Cordelia felt her heart leap into her mouth as she looked at the Fairchild ring on Matthew's hand. Her fingers left the sheet and it only held on her shoulders. "Oh, by the angel. It was so impulsive to say that," Matthew wailed. Cordelia could see that his cheeks were red and it seemed adorable to see him so nervous. She never thought of seeing him like this. "I just ... I don't want us to keep hiding this. What we feel, that we love each other and ... You know what? It was crazy, forget it." He went to put on the ring and Cordelia left her impression. She took it by the hand.

"Wait! It's just… it was very sudden," she said with a nervous chuckle. "But ... " 

"I understand, your engagement with James."

"But it's only a year," Cordelia completed, smiling at him. "Can you wait for just one year?" Matthew smiled at her. He went to his night watch and took out a gold chain. He put the Fairchild ring and handed it to Cordelia. She turned around for Matthew to put it on. The cold metal fell onto her bare chest.

When she turned around, Matthew caught her by the chin and walked over to her.

"Oh, my dear Miss Carstairs. I would wait for you as long as you want."

.

+1.

Often, the patrol teams were random, although Matthew and James were always going to be together.

Since Lucie was not yet eighteen, she could not go out on all patrol rounds with her parabatai, so Cordelia was alone with them that night.

She was in the middle of both of them. Smiling while talking to them. Their ears are always alert to any demonic activity, the sensor is always in their hand.

So it was no surprise when the demons arose as they walked through the park. The weapons had already been drawn.

Cordelia danced with Cortana as she had done that time in Hell Ruelle. She looked like a warrior queen as she fought and waved her golden sword killing demons.

He caught a glimpse of her out of the corner of his eye before the claw brushed the redhead's chest. The glitter of something metallic hanging from a chain around her neck. James hadn't paid attention to it.

It was after the demons were killed that the moment he was on his way to Cordelia to heal her, he saw the chain lying on the ground. He took it, intending to return it to the girl. He was about to call her when he saw it: Matthew's Fairchild ring glowing. Something stirred in James's stomach and he put the chain in his pocket.

He looked up to see how Matthew made a rune to Cordelia, the moment seemed so intimate, that it overwhelmed his chest.

Then his parabatai turned to him and rose to get closer.

"Are you okay, Jamie?" He asked innocently as if he hadn't shared a moment with Cordelia just seconds ago.

James must have suspected it somehow. Maybe he had wanted not to think about it, but it was inevitable now.

Not when he had the proof in his pocket.

Not when he was watching the way Matthew and Cordelia shot each other a look. Or the way she was by his side the day Matthew revealed his secret to him.

It must have been noticed.

His hand trembled, he squeezed the ring in his pocket and felt it snap into his palm.

James looked him in the eye, took his empty hand out of his pocket, and held it out to Matthew. In addition to the ring cuts, there was a longer cut on his arm. Matthew's trail burned into his skin, he could feel relief from the pain he hadn't felt before as the rune was painted on his skin.

"Where's your family ring?" James asked, his voice sounding colder than normal. Matthew shrugged his shoulders. 

"I lost it a few days ago. I guess it was in the room of a lover I had. I already asked Mom for another one, the iron sisters send it these days."

It was a lie. Matthew was a very skillful liar, James knew it perfectly.

They could hear a curse coming from Cordelia and they both turned to see her.

"Is something wrong, Daisy?" James asked when he saw her take her magic light and start looking for something on the ground. She looked at him and gave him an apologetic smile. Her red hair had fallen out of her braid and there were several strands on her face.

"I just dropped something," She said, James could hear the nerves in her voice. And Matthew looking askance at her. James sighed, reaching into his pocket and pulling out the chain.

"This?" He asked, letting the chain dance in front of their eyes. Cordelia and Matthew looked at him, then looked at each other. James looked at them with cold golden eyes, it was several minutes in silence until Matthew ripped the chain from his hands.

"I can explain it," he said. He extended the chain to Cordelia who took it.

"I guess you're together…" James said, his voice sounding colder than normal. "Or you pretend to be."

"James, Matthew asked me to marry him," she said. James felt his heart go down an abyss. "This is a promise, by the time we get divorced, he and I will be together."

James clenched his fists. There was no point in feeling the way he felt. There was no point in feeling so upset when he and Cordelia were supposed to have nothing.

Their engagement would be false, their marriage would be false. But a monster began to bloom from its chest. He felt betrayed, he felt furious and his soul sank into a deep shadow of fury and pain. The words left his mouth before he could process them.

"You can't live single, can you?" He said turning to Cordelia, he noticed that she opened her eyes wide, surprised that he spoke to her that way. "We are not married yet and you already had to find the next boy who would ask you to marry him to honor your family."

He saw Matthew clench his teeth, furious, and Cordelia went pale. The blow came earlier than expected, James's cheek turned red at the slap Cordelia had given him.

"I didn't even ask you to ask me to marry you!" She exclaimed. Her voice trembled and her eyes were bright. "I ruined myself to save you from Tatiana's accusations! I intended to go to Idris, I never asked you to save me and I thought you had been honorable in doing so."

She blinked rapidly, preventing her tears from coming out.

"Ours is a false commitment. I'm sure you're going to run to Grace after this." She pointed to the moonlight bracelet on her wrist. "It's the last straw, James, that you hope I can't follow my heart too. It's the last straw you think I'm using Matthew like I'm a manipulator."

She leaned back, right next to Matthew who had said nothing. He had let Cordelia, in all her fury, defend herself, because he knew she could do it. But James felt the green gaze on him, judging him, annoyed that he had judged Cordelia that way.

But there was also guilt on his face, something hidden in him, that made James mad.

"How long?" He asked. He saw Cordelia tremble and Matthew put his arm around her shoulders protectively. "If you tell me this is because your arrangement goes further, you love each other, right? How long have you been seeing each other?"

"Several months," Matthew replied. James noticed when he tensed, fearing his reaction, and it was that he suddenly felt so much fury rising from within him. Anger arose that had never arisen in him, an anger that made him contemplate the idea of hitting Matthew in the face. But he didn't understand why, why did he feel so betrayed if he and Cordelia had nothing? Why was he so furious about the possible furtive encounters they might have had if he also had encounters with Grace?

He clenched his fists. He noticed that Matthew was almost on guard.

He frowned and turned around starting to walk.

He was able to hear Matthew's call behind him before disappearing into the shadows.

.

Matthew cursed and returned to Cordelia. She seemed worried too. How could she not? They both loved James, they both cared about him, so they had wanted to keep their stuff hidden until much later. He was wounded. He had felt betrayed.

Matthew escorted Cordelia to her home in silence. They were supposed to talk about what they would do now. But now they both felt tired.

In less than a week, two people already knew their secrets. They didn't know how long they could hide it more.

"I'll try to talk to James," Matthew told him when they reached the outskirts of the Carstairs residence. Cordelia nodded. Matthew wanted to lean down to give her at least one sweet kiss of goodbye, but he didn't feel like the moment. So he just took her hand and kissed her softly on the back. "See you tomorrow."

"See you tomorrow," she said goodbye, giving him a small smile full of affection.

Matthew watched her enter her house, Cortana was shining on her back, then she walked away. He knew where James was, his heart always knew.

.

James was a mess when he was drunk, worse than Matthew. Maybe it had to do with not having the enough practice that Matthew had. Or did he have to see that his drunk side was a contrast to his sober side, the quiet James.

The room next to the living room they had rented in the Devil's Tavern was a disaster. In the bed, the pillows were torn by a knife, and a chair was smashed by being thrown at the wall.

James was now sitting on the couch, a bottle in the middle beckoning to Matthew.

He swallowed hard, his mother was helping him on a detox guide. Since they couldn't take all of the alcohol out of him without anxiety and fury attacks, he had provided, with the help of mundane doctors, some ways of lowering alcohol in his blood.

Matthew was gradually reducing his alcohol consumption and with the ever-present presence of James. But now ... 

He leaned against the door and looked at James. The boy's golden eyes looked at him. They stared for a long time, Matthew feeling puzzled because the situation was usually backward. He, sitting on the sofa, drunk powerlessly with his soul. And his sweet James, always taking care of him.

Matthew stumbled over to James and snatched the bottle from him. He picked it up and took several drinks before sitting down next to his parabatai who giggled.

"You're shameless," James said, snatching the bottle from him. "Look at arranging with Cordelia and now stealing the liquor. You love to steal things, don't you?"

James had no filters when he drank, he was not afraid of hurting anyone, not even his parabatai.

"I thought you were in love with Grace," Matthew said, taking out his decanter and drinking from it. He was still hiding it in his jacket, feeling the constant company in his chest.

"I do."

"Then why are you talking about Cordelia as if she was your property? She is your fiancee, I know. But you don't love her. I was going to hide in the shadows for a year, but ... I couldn't."

"You love her," James said.

"Yes," James groaned as if he couldn't bear to hear that.

"You love her…" he repeated with a grunt and drank from his bottle. "You couldn't love anyone else but her."

"Get over it, James," Matthew growled.

"And then go out behind me."

"As if you didn't do it with Grace." James narrowed his eyes at him. They were gold pits that judged Matthew.

"It's just that ..." James said, and tried to search the words in his cloudy head.

"You don't love her too, do you?" Matthew asked, in his stomach was a jumble. He wouldn't know what to do if James told him he loved her. James looked away and covered his face with his hands.

"I should break my engagement with Cordelia," he murmured. Matthew frowned. "I will tell everyone that it was a lie that I spent in her room."

"You'll have to tell them you burned Blackthorn Manor," Matthew growled. "And I won't leave you." James rubbed his face.

"And it doesn't seem fair to me now to marry Cordelia knowing that you love each other. I could say that I was ... I don't know, that night I went to an opium bar, I don't know!" Matthew growled, picked up a cushion, and hit James in the face with the object.

"We'll talk this through, all three of us, tomorrow you're sober," James giggled.

"Usually that would be something I would tell you."

.

If there was one thing Cordelia admired about James and Matthew, it was that their problems didn't last long. They had decided to meet in Matthew's apartment, at James's request, since he feared they would interrupt their conversation at the institute.

Both Matthew and Cordelia tried not to be nervous, knowing what they had done in that apartment. James had been silent, watching them, as if now he understood everything. Cordelia wondered if she and Matthew had always been so obvious.

"We should break the engagement," said James. Cordelia was going to open her mouth, she thought that something like this could happen and she was surprised that it didn't hurt as she thought before it would. "I will say you broke up with me."

"And what excuse will you give?" Cordelia questioned. "I won't let you say about the Blackthorn Mansion." James shook his head.

"I will tell the truth to my parents. They will understand it."

"What about my parents?"

"We can tell them that you found me in a compromising situation with another girl." He shrugged. "They don't say anything to us about that" and how she hated that injustice.

"And since I'm famous," said Matthew, "they'll believe you right away." It seemed like such an easy solution that Cordelia was frustrated at how unreal it felt. James looked at them, there was an awkward silence in the whole situation.

"I guess that's fine," Cordelia murmured. It didn't hurt, but strangely, a small emptiness felt in his chest. She imagined what the Herondale would say. What her parents would say, her brother.

Why did this breakup feel so strange?

She felt the warmth of Matthew's hand next to her, as if afraid to touch it. Cordelia took his hand, feeling her being stir within her at the touch and she felt calm.

"Cordelia…" James began, trying to divert his gaze from the clasped hands, "I want to apologize for what I said last night." She had been so worried about him that she had forgotten what he had said. "I didn't want to… I didn't want to say any of that. It's just ... it took me by surprise."

"That's why we didn't want to tell you until you were divorced," Matthew said, leaning on the arm of the sofa, away from Cordelia. The only thing that united them was their hands.

"Well, now remembering all the times we've been together, you didn't make it seem like you were kind of obvious at times." Cordelia felt her face warm, she looked away at Matthew who was hiding a smile with his hand.

James smiled at them.

"I'm really glad you found each other."

Cordelia felt that although his words were sweet and he said it in a way that seemed truly happy, both she and Matthew could notice the coldness and sadness in his eyes.

.

Extra.

1905.

Grosvenor Square.

Matthew's hand was warm in her. Her heart was pounding. In front of her, stood the door of the Fairchild residence. After a year, they would announce their engagement to Charlotte and Henry.

Cordelia ran her finger over the Fairchild ring on her finger. She briefly recalled the situation from the previous year, when James announced the truth to his parents. Tessa had scolded him harshly, but she knew her child's soul. Will had come to Cordelia and apologized to her, and had said that she had been very brave in saving James.

The biggest problem was his mother. And Cordelia had convinced her that, with the James scandal, which hadn't lasted long, people would forget her stain. And it was. In any case, Cordelia did not mind having been stained, she did not expect another man to insinuate herself into marriage, she already had an arrangement with someone she loved.

James had continued to be good to them. He was still just as smiling, still had good chemistry with Matthew. But there were times when she could see him looking at her, or looking at Matthew with sadness in his eyes.

As if he realized he had lost everything.

"Are you ready?" Matthew asked. Cordelia looked at him and nodded. "With Charles now married, I can also announce it now."

"Your mother won't bother you getting engaged to a girl stained ?" Cordelia asked. Matthew chuckled.

"My mother? She doesn't care about any of that. That's what makes her so wonderful." Cordelia giggled. Matthew opened the front door and they both entered. They could hear voices in the Consul's office. They made their way to the venue, and Matthew gently opened the door to find Charlotte, sitting on her husband's lap, reading quietly as he placed soft kisses on her cheek. "Believe it or not, I'm very used to seeing this," Matthew whispered to Cordelia.

He knocked on the door, startling his parents.

Charlotte jumped off Henry's legs, getting up, as the man moved to the color of her hair.

"Matthew! We didn't hear you come in," the woman said nervously, then looked at Cordelia and gave her a nervous smile.

"Mom, Dad, can we talk?" He asked. Charlotte, already relieving the red on her face, nodded. Matthew took Cordelia's hand and together they passed. "Mom, Dad, although you already know Cordelia, this time I want to introduce her to you as my fiancee."

Charlotte's small scream of excitement made them all smile.

Cordelia did not care about what the consul would say, she knew that she was more than welcome.