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a summer night in july

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It had been months since Robbe had gone to a party. It wasn’t like he had missed them too much, he had actually quite enjoyed himself during all the time he needed to stay inside. The only thing he had been missing, craving after all that time, was Sander.

After two months of lockdown, the two boys had been allowed to see each other again. The first time Robbe saw Sander after those months had felt like the first time he ever saw him all over again. He looked different, felt different, smelled different, tasted different, yet, all of the above were somehow also just exactly the same, as if he came back home again in the arms of the one person that made him feel safe the most.

He didn’t know how to explain it. His love for Sander still was a feeling that was new to him, as he fell in love with him more and more every single day. It was indescribable, like you tried to name a word but just couldn’t, even though it was lying on the tip of your tongue. He just couldn’t explain, not even if he tried to. Sander was an addiction, his second half that he couldn’t even try to distance himself from. And he didn’t want to, either. He wanted to be with Sander all the time, forever. He didn’t care whatever it took.

And now, after all this time, after all the shit this year had brought them and their friends, finally something fun was happening. Moyo was celebrating his birthday, throwing a black and white party to celebrate not only himself, but also everyone else, dedicating the theme of the party to equality and respect. During all this time, Moyo had become more and more of a true, real friend to Robbe. Where there had been hard times at first, Moyo had really changed into a better person, or, what Robbe liked to believe, more into his true self.

And of course, Sander decided to wear all black to the party just because he knew Robbe loved that. But how could he not? The black shirt was wrapped tightly around his chest that had gotten more muscular during lockdown, it being covered by his classic leather jacket, while his also black pants were skinny, covering up the skin of his still quite slender legs. He, of course, wore his Dr. Martins underneath, wearing his cologne that Robbe adored incredibly much simply because it reminded him of the day they had first met, as Sander had worn it back then, too.

And last but not least, the black color of his outfit suited his fresh, natural brown locks incredibly well, too.

Robbe was quite sure he had never seen Sander quite as gorgeous as he was tonight ever before. But then again, he thought that every single day. Sander looked like a dream Robbe never wanted to wake up from.

He moved himself away from the bar, grabbing the two beers he had just ordered, placing himself on a chair next to his friends. He put the beers down on the table in front of him, as he stared into the distance, immediately finding Sander’s eyes at the other end of the place.

He was standing with Noor and some other friends his ex-girlfriend apparently had brought. Robbe didn’t know whether Sander knew them or not, all he knew was that he didn’t seem to care, as all he was ever looking at was Robbe. As Robbe took a sip of his beer, Sander smiled at him, giving him a wink that gave the brunet goosebumps. He was leaning against a wooden pole, his hands in his pockets, looking extremely handsome. His eyes looked love stoned, so much that even from this distance Robbe was able to notice. He watched him, as he mouthed ‘’I love you’’ towards him, making Robbe’s cheeks flush bright red.

Robbe mouthed an ‘’I love you too’’ back at him, which apparently was enough to make the brunet come over to him. He wasn’t even quite sure how they had been able to stay away this far from each other for the past half an hour.

He placed himself down next to him, giving Robbe a kiss on his lips, as their friends immediately started to make ‘’aw’’ sounds. Robbe scoffed as he tried to ignore Aaron’s ‘’get a room’’ when Sander intertwined his fingers with Robbe’s and brushed his nose against his cheek.

‘’I’m cold.’’ Robbe mumbled, as he watched his arms fill up with goosebumps when the outside breeze started to get worse. It was a summer night, so it wasn’t that cold, but the temperature did suddenly become a lot lower after the clock hit midnight.

Sander moved away, releasing his hand from Robbe’s fingers, as he took of his leather jacket and put it on Robbe’s shoulders, covering the small boy so much, that he looked even smaller now.

‘’Better?’’ His boyfriend asked. Robbe nodded and smiled at him as the brunet placed a soothing kiss on his shoulder.

‘’Have I told you how good you look tonight already?’’ Sander whispered suddenly, putting a hand on Robbe’s knee, placing his chin on his shoulder to reach his ear. Robbe giggled, knowing the others could see them, but somehow, he really didn’t care.

‘’Just, like… fifty times? I think?’’ Robbe answered, moving his face towards Sander to place his forehead against his.

‘’Hm. That’s not nearly enough.’’

Sander stood up as he grabbed Robbe’s hand, pulling it to take him off of the chair he was sitting on. Robbe let himself be guided, trusting Sander a hundred percent, even though he had absolutely no idea what his intentions were.

His boyfriend grabbed him by his waist, as he pushed him against the wall next to the bar where Robbe had just gotten them both a beer, suddenly completely having forgotten about the both of them. All he saw and cared about right now was Sander.

The brunet kissed him in his neck, leaving traces of his warm and safe touch all the way to his ear, his earring, his jaw, back to his mouth. ‘’You’re so fucking hot.’’

Robbe groaned softly, biting his lower lip, pulling Sander’s shorter hair slightly. ‘’Sander… there’s people watching us.’’

‘’Well, then let’s show them what they’re missing.’’ Sander grinned, his bold actions making Robbe laugh, as he pulled him closer towards him by his neck, crashing his lips against his.

Sander’s soft lips brushed against Robbe’s, the touch feeling new and different every single time they kissed, making Robbe want more, making him want all of him every single time. As Sander bit his lower lip, Robbe opened his mouth slightly to let him gain access. His tongue explored his own, the intense feeling giving them both goosebumps all over their bodies. Sander’s hands travelled down underneath his leather jacket Robbe still wore, his thumbs disappearing underneath the thin fabric of Robbe’s white shirt, as he drew circles on his hips, his other fingertips softly caressing his back.

Robbe wrapped his arms around his neck completely, standing on his tiptoes to reach the brunet as well as he possibly could. His hands travelled through his fresh, brown locks, never getting enough of them, never getting enough of him.

Sander’s hands moved to cup Robbe’s hips, as he grabbed them firmly, pushing his lower body against the brunet’s. ‘’Is this shirt new?’’ He questioned suddenly, his lips never leaving Robbe’s. The brunet nodded, backing down a little out of confusion.

‘’Yes, why?’’

Sander moved back, observing Robbe’s upper body completely, clearly taking in and enjoying the sight of what was standing right in front of him, desperately waiting in the grip of his arms.

‘’Fuck, you have no idea how badly I want to take it off.’’

Robbe chuckled, raising both eyebrows. ‘’Does it look that bad on me?’’

Suddenly, Sander wrapped both hands around his hips again, pushing him even further against the wall, as he hid his face in the crook of Robbe’s neck, kissing his skin and sucking it between his lips slightly, yet, enough to make Robbe want to produce sounds he probably shouldn’t right now.

‘’No. You look extremely, fucking attractive. You make me go absolutely insane.’’ Robbe’s heart skipped a beat, still not being used to the way he apparently made Sander feel, still not being able to believe that someone like Sander was attracted to him in the first place.

‘’You’re not so bad yourself.’’ Robbe whispered, delivering both a chuckle and a groan from Sander, as Robbe pulled his hair once again. The brunet backed down again, locking both eyes with Robbe’s.

‘’Fuck, I can’t keep my hands off of you.’’ His hand cupped Robbe’s face, his thumb caressing his cheek, as Robbe closed his eyes to enjoy the feeling. The both of them knew they were extremely turned on, but they couldn’t just leave the party right now. Especially when they were finally able to see their friends like this again.

Robbe put his forehead against Sander’s, brushing his nose against his boyfriend’s.

‘’I am so incredibly in love with you.’’ Sander whispered, as if they were the only two in the world right now.

‘’I love you, too.’’ Robbe answered, knowing Sander knew, even if he hadn’t. The brunet wrapped his arms around Robbe’s waist, lifting him off of the wall up into the air, as he turned him around in circles, making Robbe yelp in reaction. He put him down again, pulling him back against him, as Robbe hid his face in his neck.

‘’You make me the happiest person in the universe.’’ Robbe mumbled against Sander’s shoulder, as he felt his boyfriend caressing the back of his head with his fingertips, knowing he smiled, knowing he loved hearing how good he made Robbe feel, their bodies never leaving each other.

Sander moved himself back, releasing Robbe from his shoulder, and put his lips against his. They just stood there for a while, kissing each other, taking the other in completely, enjoying each other’s presence like it would be the last time in forever. But it wouldn’t be. Sander was his world, and that was never gonna change.

Sander moved himself to his ear, whispering endless ‘’I love you’s’’, wanting to make sure Robbe felt loved, wanting to make him feel just how much he meant to him. Even after all this time, even after all they had been through. He loved Robbe endlessly, in a way he didn’t know love existed.

‘’Can’t we just… sneak away?’’ Sander asked, his face still hidden at Robbe’s ear.


‘’What? Don’t you want to?’’ His hands moved down underneath Robbe’s shirt, it being hidden by the leather jacket that Robbe was still wearing.

‘’You know I do.’’

‘’Then what’s stopping you?’’ Sander’s warm hands caressed his back while he studied Robbe’s face, the brunet himself observing his friends sitting and dancing together in the distance.

‘’You love them a lot, don’t you?’’ Robbe was taken out of his thoughts as Sander’s words hit him, them being truer than he ever realized himself. He loved his friends loads, and the fact he was finally with them again right now, in a place, altogether after all this time, made him want to stay even more than he wanted to leave with Sander.

‘’I do.’’ Robbe answered, feeling a pit of guilt form in his stomach. He didn’t want to disappoint Sander. And even though he knew he probably never could, he still felt bad.

‘’Then let’s stay. We’ll be together tonight, after all.’

‘’You’re sure?’’ Robbe asked. Sander smiled, brushing his nose against Robbe and pressing a soft kiss to his lips.

‘’A hundred percent.’’