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They're Betting on Me (and they're all wrong)

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Lan Wangji sighed inwardly as he felt his room shake in the middle of a lecture on time dilation and cleaned up the chalk that had fallen off of his blackboard, each piece now cleanly snapped in two from the impact with the ground. This was quite a common occurrence ever since Wei Wuxian had joined the teaching staff at Cloud Recesses Academy as an applied physics teacher, much to the chagrin of the principal, his uncle Lan Quiren. But the man had yet to actually burn down the school so at least there’s that.


The students, though still paying attention to the lecture, perked up once they heard the explosion. On cue, about five minutes after the explosion Wei Wuxian himself poked his head through the door, a sheepish smile on his lips (though perhaps there was more mischief than any actual discernible shame).


“Hey Lan Zhan -- I mean Mr.Lan,” he corrected himself, though the students were well used to the man’s casualness when referring to everyone. “Do I have to buy you new chalk?” He asked, as was customary when this happened. The students were still confused as to what the nature of their relationship was. Lan Wangji generally was indifferent towards Wei Wuxian while Wei Wuxian was generally around him all the time and most of the school looked forward to every interaction, the wheel of gossip always turning and injecting interest to distract from their studies.
“Mn, what did you do?” Lan Wangji asked, turning back briefly to address the students “Class, do page 156, evens only,” he stepped out into the hall, following behind the other man, to see if the Wei Wuxian needed any help cleaning up.


“No one got hurt," Wei Wuxian assured, "Wen Ning and myself can clean up just fine, what colors do I owe you?” Wei Wuxian prattled in what was clearly a well-practiced manner.


“Yellow and green,” Lan Wangji said as he looked down the hall, face set in its usual stoic manner “and a dinner.”
Wei Wuxian gasped, ‘Lan Zhannnn!! How can you be so certain! Maybe he didn’t even hear it, and you’ll owe me dinner, huh?” As if he could hear the two men Jin Zixuan came running down the hallway holding a fire extinguisher. Lan Wangji gave Wei Wuxian a knowing look, “Fine we’ll go to that nasty health place you keep suggesting.”


“What happened?” Jin Zixuan asked, panting, “I heard an explosion.” He looked between the two of them.


“Ah, nothing, Mr.Peacock, just a small mishap, Wen Ning’s got it covered.”


Lan Wangji just gave Jin Zixuan an icy glare and walked back into his classroom.



“What’s the deal with Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji?” Jin Zixuan asked as he sat down for lunch.


“They’re either oblivious, dating, or Lan Wangji is going to murder Wei Wuxian. Do you wanna bet?” Wen Qing supplied helpfully, “Personally, I think that they’re both oblivious and going to take another year to figure out that they can just date mostly because they’re idiots.”


“I think that Lan Wangji is going to kill Wei Wuxian by the end of the year,” Nie Mingjue added before taking a bite of his apple and falling silent again.


“I’m not allowed to bet because apparently being his brother gives me insider knowledge, even though I keep telling them that I don’t know,” Jiang Cheng complained.


“And I’m not allowed because I already know,” Nie Huaisang added with a wink, “and no I won’t tell you even if you don’t take the bet.”



Wei Wuxian collapses onto the couch when he finally gets home, dropping his bags on the ground and sinking into the couch cushions only to perk up when a cool glass is pressed into his hand, he doesn't even have to open his eyes to know it's his favorite wine, and he groans in delight when his wonderful husband starts massaging his shoulders.


“Uncle?” he asks, fingers pressing into the muscles of Wei Wuxian's neck, forcing the tension from them.


“Ah, Lan Zhan, Old man Lan is so uncreative! Always the same lecture about how if I continue being reckless I will ruin the School’s reputation, blah blah blah,” Wei Wuxian immediately starts whining, “I have never actually put a student in danger, and I’m careful with safety most of the time!!”
“Wei Ying is a good teacher,” Lan Wangji asserts, coming around to sit on the couch next to his husband and pull him into his side, mindful of the half-full glass of Emperor’s Smile.


“Aiya Lan Zhan! You always know what to say to cheer this old man up,” Wei Wuxian exclaims while cuddling closer to Lan Zhan, who knew very well that these meetings affected his husband more than he let on.


Therefore, Lan Wangji pulled his husband closer, pressing a kiss to the top of his head, and turned on HGTV for some mindless TV to take his mind off of the meeting and relax a bit. It wasn't the kind of television he preferred, but for his Wei Ying, it was perfect.


After an episode of The Property Brothers, with ample commentary on their design choices, Wei Wuxian asked Lan Wangji, “When do you think they’ll figure out we’re married? I want to be able to show everyone that Lan Zhan is mine!”


“Mn. Wei Ying is mine,” Lan Zhan agreed easily.


“Of course!!! But I want to be able to kiss you in public! In front of everyone -- including Old Man Lan!” Much to Wei Wuxian’s delight, Lan Wangji’s ears turned red, “Shameless,” he said, “but, we can if you want. It was Wei Ying’s idea to keep it secret.”


“Noooo, Lan Zhan!!!! That would be so boring though!! Nobody’s even betting that we’re married so no one will even win! We have to wait until someone will win, I mean it’s not like we’re making it difficult, we wear our rings to school every day," Wei Wuxian held up his hand, fingers tangled

with Lan Zhan's, playfully wiggling them, silver band flashing in the low light of the living room.


“Whatever Wei Ying wants,” Lan Wangji says, embarrassingly fond.


Wei Wuxian only cuddles closer, “Lan Zhan you are too good to this husband.”


Lan Zhan looks down at his husband, and captures him in a soft kiss, thanking again every star that aligned to bring this ball of sunshine into his life.