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Can we have sex now?

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“Babe, calm down,” Eve whispers to Villanelle, who’s foot is tapping up a storm. Villanelle doesn’t even seem to hear her. The blonde is getting her wisdom teeth out today and this is the most scared that Eve has ever seen her girlfriend. Eve almost had to drag her into the car and all the promises of ice cream and sex barely helped. She’s just glad she was able to talk Villanelle out of wearing a suit and into silk pajamas.


“Villanelle Astankova?” the oral surgeon calls. Villanelle inhales sharply and Eve squeezes her hand. They stand up together and walk towards the dentist. “And you are?” she asks, looking expectantly at Eve.


“Eve Polastri. I’m her girlfriend,” she answers.


“If you can just wait in here, I’ll come get you when she’s done,” the oral surgeon says. Eve kisses Villanelle’s cheek and doesn’t miss the slight tremor in her hand as they walk away. Eve goes to sit down and pulls out her laptop. She has some serious catching up to do on her favorite show.


“Just in here,” the dentist - Elena, she says her name is - tells Villanelle. The Russian lays down on the reclined chair. “Have you ever had an IV before?”


Villanelle shakes her head.


“That’s okay. It’s just going to feel like a little pinch. Now straighten your arm and open and close your fist.” Villanelle does, trying to ignore her rapidly increasing heartbeat.


“I don’t really like needles,” she tells Elena, adding a little smile to feel braver. 


“It helps if you don’t look at it.”


Elena cleans a spot on her arm with a wipe and Villanelle, too proud to listen, watches the entire time as the needle goes into her arm. She jumps a little and watches Elena the entire time as she hooks the IV up to the machine and slips an oxygen tube around her face.


Villanelle only has time to think of Eve for a second before she’s out.


“Eve Polastri?”


Eve jerks awake. “Yes?”


“Villanelle is almost awake. Pull your car around to the side exit and you can come on in,” the oral surgeon says and Eve groggily packs up her laptop and does as she’s told.


Her girlfriend is just waking up when Eve walks into the room and she smiles fondly at the blonde. It still amazes her how Villanelle can go from scorching hot to adorably cute just like that.


“Eve,” Villanelle moans and reaches out for the older woman.


“I’m here, baby,” Eve tells her, stroking blonde hair from her forehead. Eve helps her out of the chair and has to catch Villanelle as she stumbles. Villanelle giggles into Eve’s neck.


“Remember what you said before this?” Villanelle murmurs. It’s a little tough to understand her though the gauze in her mouth, but unfortunately for Eve, it’s still possible to figure out what’s she saying. “You said that if I was a good girl today, you were gonna take me home and spread me wide and lick -“


“Yep, I remember that,” Eve loudly interrupts, her face growing red as the oral surgeon gapes at them.


“Elena, we’re gonna have sex!” Villanelle announces, swaying back and forth. “We have the best sex. Eve is really good at it. So am I. One time, I poured champagne over her entire body -“


“Okay, babe, I don’t think the nice lady needs to hear about that. How long until the anesthesia wears off?” Eve asks, trying really hard to not let Villanelle sucking on her neck affect her.


“It should be soon. The numbness will wear off by tonight and she should not engage in any type of physical activities for at least five days. Here’s all the information.” Elena hands two papers over to her. “The medicine will be ready in about thirty minutes so make sure she takes that. Change the gauze when you get home and she should only eat soft foods for a few days. There will be swelling so ice the cheeks for twenty minutes on, twenty minutes off.”


“Great, thank you so much,” Eve tells her. “Villanelle, you ready?”


“I can’t feel my mouth, Eve. Can you kiss it and make it better?” Villanelle asks nicely. Eve kisses Villanelle’s chin and starts to guide her out of the room.


Eve pushes open the door and holds it for Villanelle, who manages to get into the passenger seat of the car without falling.


“Eve,” Villanelle whines.


“Yes, baby?”


“I’m hungry.”


“Okay, well, we have soup and yogurt and ice cream at home.”


“Not for food. For you,” Villanelle says with a smirk, but it ends up looking more like a grimace with the gauze in her mouth.


Eve makes a mental note to google if anesthesia usually makes people horny or if it’s just Villanelle.


“You know what I just realized?” Villanelle asks earnestly. “We’ve never had car sex.”


“As much fun as being cramped in the backseat of this car with you sounds, I prefer sex in our house.”


Out of the corner of her eye, Eve sees Villanelle frown thoughtfully. “You sounded like you were having a good time when we did it in the bathroom at one of your work events. And I know you liked it when I fingered you under the table at that dinner that one time. What about that time we did it in the hotel pool?”


Eve chokes and thanks God when she pulls into the driveway of their house.


“Come on, baby. Let’s get you into bed and get some ice.” Eve helps her out of the car and up the stairs into their bedroom. Villanelle flops down onto the bed and Eve goes downstairs to get bags of ice. When she comes back, her jaw drops wide open.


Villanelle is standing there naked with chipmunk cheeks and gauze sticking out of her mouth. She looks insanely hot but at the same time, so funny.


“Can we have sex now?” Villanelle asks and Eve laughs softly.


“How about you get dressed, change the gauze in your mouth, take a nap, and then we’ll see about sex.”


Villanelle pouts, but reluctantly puts her clothes back on. Eve helps her change the gauze and then tucks her under the covers.




“We’re not having sex, Villanelle.”


“Will you stay with me?” the blonde asks quietly and Eve’s heart melts.


“Of course, baby.” She climbs into bed next to her and spoons her. She smiles when Villanelle snuggles into her and Eve kisses the side of her hair.






“I love you,” Villanelle whispers.


“I love you too, baby. So much,” Eve tells her and Villanelle burrows further into her arms.


“Can we have sex now?”