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Karaoke Confession

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The cab rolled up to the curb by the bar and I couldn't believe we were here. More specifically, I couldn't believe I had managed to convince Lucien to come with us. He had completely taken me by surprise when he had agreed to join me and some friends from work for a little singing fun. As soon as I had told Kiki and Willow, even they could barely contain their excitement, and immediately took over my wardrobe for the night. Not that I minded. I'm hopeless at doing my hair and Willow is a cosmetic GOD. Kiki had swept through my closet like it was her own. She scrunched up her dainty nose.

"Do you own anything sexy?"

I shrugged.

"Define sexy."

She sighed in exasperation and pulled out a couple items.

"It's a good thing they keep the bar cold, cause you look your best in these tights."

"Uh-huh, and you look best when you leave that snark at home."

Kiki giggled and left the room so I could dress. She had found me a soft black sweater with a sloping neckline and hugged my curves. Over the aforementioned tights, she paired a blue and green plaid skirt. Remembering how tall the professor was and how short I am, I decided the high heeled boots that hit just over my ankle were my best bet. I took a look in the mirror. Willow had given me some lazy curls and a wicked cats eye. It was a lot of black for one outfit, but I like black. It's slimming!

Just as I exited my bedroom, I heard a knock at the door. Willow had to nudge Kiki before she embarrassed us all with her ooohing. I opened the door and there he was. I swear this man can make anything look good. He was just dressed in casual black pants and a long sleeved shirt that hugged his muscles, but damn. His voice was it's usual soft tone.

"I hope I'm not too early. I just wanted to check and see when you wanted to leave."

I beamed up at him.

"We're ready. Let's go!"

 

And now we were here. We waited at the front until Minor and even Anna arrived. We got to our private room and it was beautiful. Cushy seats and fun lights were everywhere. Kiki practically had stars in her eyes. Minor wasted no time and grabbed the mic. His light voice reverberated through the microphone.

"Let's get this party started!"

As my friends ran down their list of favorite pop hits and Disney songs, I managed to sneak a few peeks at Lucien.

He was so out of place in this sort of atmosphere, but it didn't seem to matter. He kept his gentle smile on through it all, even when Kiki would go off key. Eventually, he caught me in the act. His smile deepened, reaching his eyes. He slid over the couch towards me so he wouldn't need to raise his voice.

"Aren't you going to sing something?"

I opened my mouth to answer, but Anna next to me decided to answer for me.

"Are you sure you want her to? You might regret it!"

I turned to give Anna a dirty look, but Lucien just chuckled good naturedly. He rested a hand on top of mine.

"I'm sure you are fine. Why don't you try when Willow finishes her song?"

As Willow drew out the last note of Walk Away, I walked up to take the mic from her. My legs were trembling slightly, making me glad I chose these heels that would hide it a little when I walked. I swallowed hard. When I found out Lucien would be coming with us, I knew what song I had to choose. There were so many things I wanted to say to him, and from the first time I had heard this song, I felt like it spoke everything I couldn't. I had even practiced at home a few times to avoid messing up tonight. Now, all I could do is hope he could hear what I hadn't said before.

"Here goes…"

I faced my friends as the sound of woodwinds filled the air. They were eerie and ethereal. I took a deep breath.

In black and white no whisper of colour
In monochrome we met each other
I'll put my faith in my pain
In you to keep safe

I gazed down at Lucien and found him sitting straight up, eyes glued to mine.

The autumn wind is so unforgiving
Much like the scars that trace my body
Your icy tough I trust
I feel it's beckoning me

I closed my eyes and let the music take me to a different landscape. A field of black with the night sky stretched across. Sometimes it felt like I was stuck in this void, and it was Lucien that became my moon and stars.

I was melting away and breaking
But then you tenderly saved me from myself
Fate is the game we're playing
And it all starts with a monochrome kiss

Now was the time. If I didn't put my all into it now, I didn't think I'd be able to. I looked directly into those swirling violet pools and put my heart on display

Nevertheless I'm searching on
Looking for a single drop of love
I look into your eyes
Eyes that have never once cried
They tell a tale beyond time

And if I can I'll seek the end
Shrouded in my pain just as I am
Hiding within the night
Together we'll find it
Under the light of the moon

The interlude seemed to transport the two of us away. No lights or friends, just me singing to him and him drinking me in.

How many nights have I loved in your wake
I've come to know
To see your heartache
I need you here with me
Without you I forget to breathe

With your gaze I am captivated
But I am finding it holds no warmth at all
Now all the rules are changing
But I despise how you lie with a kiss

His gentle demeanor was lost somewhere along the way. Now Lucien looked... darker. Needier. It drew me in like a moth to flame.

I'm begging please don't leave me alone
Colour in my heart right to my soul
Lulling me to sleep
Lies that I've always believed
So tell a tale in my dreams

I'm so confused I've lost my mind
Whispers soft as I. Closing my eyes
Finding all that is lost
Your smile the cost was
Under the light of the moon

I took a step back into reality as the song wound to it's final chorus. The exaggerated beats pulsed through me body and soul.

I was melting away and breaking
But then you tenderly saved me from myself
Fate is the game we're playing
And it all starts with a monochrome kiss

Nevertheless I'm searching on
Looking for a single drop of love
I look into your eyes
Eyes that have never once cried
They tell a tale beyond time

And if I can I'll seek the end
Shrouded in my pain just as I am
Your wish in the dark
Shining in Bay like the dawn
A barely new tomorrow

I closed my eyes again and let the finale take over.

So pay it again
So passionate
A braveless kiss on my lips
Hiding within the night together we'll find it
My final night under the moon

As the last notes petered out, the room went dead. No one spoke, no one moved. It was just hitting the point of discomfort when Minor jumped from his seat and clapped. Willow looked dumbfounded.

"Damn, girl. Where have you been hiding that?"

She gave me a quick hug as I sat back down next to Lucien, happy to take the weight off my shaking legs. I could feel his gaze boring into my side, but I was too chicken to look his way. It was much easier to watch Kiki and Minor do that one duet from Wicked. Before long, I couldn't take it and excused myself to go get some air.

 

The night air was crisp and made me glad Kiki had picked me out a sweater. I blew my breath out all at once, watching the small cloud it made rise upward. I had done it, I had sung the song. But what was supposed to happen now? Had he figured out what I was trying to do? And if he did, would it mess up our friendship? Now the ugly monster of regret was growing in my stomach. I let out a groan.

Before I could run off like the coward I absolutely was, a familiar figure came up beside me. The last one I wanted to see in that moment. I could feel my cheeks growing hot and tried to hide it behind the curtain of my hair. Lucien seemed not to notice, looking instead to the sky.

"Lovely moon out tonight."

Despite it all, his honeyed voice was a balm to my nerves. I allowed myself a centering breath and tucked my hair behind an ear, giving me a better look at the man. His gentle smile had returned, but the slight crease in his brow made him look conflicted.

"Lucien, I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable back there. I was just-"

He lightly rested a hand on my shoulder.

"You didn't make me uncomfortable. I was merely thinking about the lyrics in your song. They were very... poignant."

It felt like he was waiting for me to confess. The problem was, I wasn't sure what confession he was wanting, for me to express my feelings or not. I figured I had gotten this far, it was too late to chicken out now.

"Yeah. That song means a lot to me...it actually reminds me of you."

"Oh?" He responded as if he had expected as much. He took a loose curl and lazily wrapped in around his fingers. I took that as an invitation to keep going.

"Mhm...you see, Lucien," I braced myself for the worst, looking down so I wouldn't have to see if those lovely violet eyes turned icy. "I know that something is off with you. And I know you won't tell me what exactly it is, but…"

His hand had stopped moving in my hair, but I couldn't stop now.

"But I don't care about that. No matter what you're hiding from me, you're also the man who is so kind and caring to me. You challenge my mind, yet let me be childish when I need to be. You make my whole world warmer and brighter."

I could feel tears welling as the words fell out of my mouth. He hadn't moved again. If I was going to lose him, I would do it with everything on the table.

"Lucien, I lo-"

A hand found my chin and jerked my face upward. I found arms wrapped around me, firmly holding me in place. Lucien had pulled me into an embrace, but left a hair's breadth between us. He was looking into my eyes, searching. If I just tilted my head a little more…

My lips softly met his, a questioning touch. His eyes went wide just as mine did, both of us surprised by my movement. He quickly overcame his shock and answered my question in the affirmative. His mouth slammed against mine, a welcome assault. I felt his tongue seek entry and gladly invited it in. His arms wrapped further around me, and everywhere he touched, it was like fire on my skin. Every fiber of my being was dancing in delight. My heart threatened to beat right out of my chest to join with his. As our tongues danced together, my hands found themselves moving up over his sculpted chest, over his neck and jaw, and into his hair. It was so soft and fine, it felt wonderful flowing through my fingers. As I tugged at the strands, his large hands drew nonsensical shapes over my back and hips, eliciting goosebumps everywhere he touched.

We broke apart gasping for breath. Before I could seek out his mouth for more, he littered light kisses from the corner of my mouth to where my jaw met my neck. That and the cold air hitting the wet marks he left behind was doing all kinds of sinful things to my body. He drew away until his lips were at my ear. He spoke in barely more than a whisper.

"A kiss from you is far from monochrome."