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Safe and Sound (Katsuki Bakugou AgeRe)

Summary:

A series of short stories set in the same universe centered around Katsuki age regressing.

Notes:

I hope you guys like this!! This topic really interests me and I just wanna see blasty boy gettin some well-needed TLC

(See the end of the work for more notes and other works inspired by this one.)

Chapter 1: Thumb-Sucking (w/ Carer Kiri)

Summary:

Katsuki comes face-to-face with his regression (and Eijirou helps).

Notes:

IMPORTANT NOTE: this fic is absolutely off-limits if you are/support MAPs/NOMAPs/k*nk-related regression in any way shape or form!

BIG CW FOR TRANSPHOBIA AT ONE PART (T-slur from the gross grape boy), and also self doubt :(

Chapter Text

Sometimes, Katsuki feels... small.

It’s hard to explain, but when he gets really stressed out, he feels a bit juvenile. Babyish, even. He’ll find himself being whiny and seeking out childish comforts like playing with his hair, watching animated shows, wrapping himself in a soft blanket.

The more stressed out he is, the younger he feels. And as consequence, the younger he feels, the more embarrassing his actions are. In the past he’s done things like wet the bed, call up his mother crying, gone completely nonverbal in front of his friends.

But the worst of it, the thing that makes Katsuki want to curl up in a ball and disappear from the world, is the thumb sucking.

This is the worst because despite it being so OBVIOUS, he never registers that he’s actually doing it. It’s one of the first signs that he’s about to slip into his humiliating headspace, and yet he’s not even aware of the thumb in his mouth until it’s wrinkly and slick with his own saliva.

It’s disgusting.

He knows in the back of his mind that he should figure this out. Talk to a therapist, do online research, SOMETHING. Anything, really. But he’s stubborn, so instead of facing his internal struggle head-on, he pushes it down until he can find any semblance of control over it and attempts the best treatment of mental illness that he knows: repression.

(Spoiler alert: not healthy.)

It’s been a very stressful week.

First, he found out that he’s failing English. Yamada Sensei pulled him aside after class and apologetically told him that he needed to find someone willing to tutor him, because he doesn’t have the time to do it himself.

(Eijirou, ever the clingy bastard, was waiting for him outside the classroom and happened to hear everything. Lucky for Katsuki, English happened to be his best course, and he eagerly offered to help him get his grades up.)

Next, he rolled his ankle during training and was ordered to sit out for the rest of the week by Recovery Girl. Apparently, he’s been “too reckless” and has “subsequently used up his healing privileges.” He thinks it’s a load of bullshit, but manages to keep himself from telling her this to avoid further punishment.

After that, Mineta had to go and run his mouth to Kaminari about “all the trannies in class.” Apparently, someone trying to be comfortable in their own skin is a turnoff for the little shrimp. Normally, Katsuki would grit his teeth and try not to blow him up, but he was at his wit’s end. He ended up screaming at Mineta through tears and explosions, despite Kaminari’s best efforts to calm him down. The much shorter boy didn’t know whether to be terrified or repulsed by Katsuki’s actions, but he kept his mouth shut after that.

And now he’s studying with Eijirou.

“... So,” the redhead says, tapping his pencil on his thighs. “You wanna talk about it?”

“About what?” Katsuki spits, rubbing his thumb on his chin absentmindedly.

“Mineta,” Eijirou clarifies. “I mean, he definitely had it coming, but I haven’t seen you get that emotional when fighting anyone other than Midoriya. You doing okay?”

“... Can’t we just study?” Katsuki says, sighing.

“Yeah, yeah. Sure, man,” Eijirou says. “Okay, so, this word means...”

Katsuki can’t focus. His brain feels clouded and heavy as he desperately tries to follow Eijirou’s words. He drags his thumb over his lips, rubbing his nail against the soft skin in a half-conscious attempt to ground himself.

“... Which is why it ends in the ‘-ing’ sound instead of ‘gu.’ Does that make... sense...?” He trails off, staring at Katsuki.

The blonde makes a face of confusion and opens his mouth to give Eijirou a piece of his mind when he realizes his lips are pursed around his thumb. He pops it out of his mouth quickly and rubs it against his sweatpants, eyes wide and ears rushing with blood.

“U-Uh,” he stutters out gracefully.

“Heh,” Eijirou chuckles. “Habit you can’t shake? I get it, man.”

Katsuki doesn’t say anything, he just shivers. He feels so cold all of a sudden. Seemingly of their own volition, his arms wrap around his own middle, hugging himself. Eijirou frowns.

“Are you okay?” He asks.

“‘M just feelin’ a lil...” he squirms awkwardly. “U-Um. A lil weird right now.”

“Are you sick?!” Eijirou asks with alarm, bringing an hand up to check Katsuki’s forehead. The taller boy nuzzles into the touch. “Uh, Bakugou?!” He squeals, recoiling.

Katsuki feels his eyes start to water, and he stands up, definitely feeling wobbly in the legs but also like every cell in his body is in panic mode. He needs to get out of here, now.

He rushes out of Eijirou’s room as fast as he can and into his own, throwing the door shut behind him and collapsing face-first onto his bed. He scrambles to reach for his pillow and presses his face into it as he starts to cry, sniffles muffled by the plush fabric.

It feels like hours before the knock sounds at his door (it’s closer to twenty minutes), and he hiccups out a broken sob before standing up and shuffling over to open it.

“You forgot your stuff,” Eijirou says, smiling at him reassuringly as he holds up his bag. Katsuki looks down at the floor. “Can I come in?” He asks gently.

“I guess,” Katsuki sniffs, toeing the floor. He steps aside for Eijirou to enter the room.

“Okay,” he says, sitting down on his bed. “I did some research, and I think I get what’s going on? I mean, I assume you’ll want to tell me yourself, but I figured I’d come prepared.”

“Um... I dunno.”

“Hm?”

“I’o’know what’s goin’ on,” Katsuki explains. “So I can’t tell you.”

“Oh,” Eijirou says softly. “Is this the first time you’ve felt like this?” Katsuki shakes his head. “Just didn’t want to find out?” A nod. “Why?”

“S’gross,” Katsuki says. “Weird.”

“... You want me to explain what I know?” Eijirou asks. Katsuki hesitates, but nods shortly and sits down next to him. The redhead pulls out his phone and opens up an article he was reading. “This says you’re experiencing symptoms of age regression. Basically, your brain is going back to how it was when you were a little kid. It’s common in people with PTSD. See? It’s not weird.”

Katsuki stares at the screen in front of him, displaying words with fancy names that he can’t process at the moment. His lip wobbles.

“I read some other stuff too,” Eijirou says lightly. “People who learned how to reclaim this as a coping mechanism. They made it into something really healthy and helpful to themselves. Doesn’t that sound nice?”

“Mhm,” Katsuki hums quietly, still feeling very overwhelmed. Eijirou turns his phone off.

“You... don’t have to talk to me about it,” he says. “But I’d like to help. You shouldn’t have to deal with this alone, Bakugou.”

Katsuki sniffs and rubs his face against his own shoulder. Eijirou notices his hands clenching open and closed in his lap, and he can’t help but feel sympathetic. ‘Poor guy,’ he thinks. ‘Dealing with this all alone.’

“... Okay,” Katsuki finally whispers.

“Um..” Eijirou tilts his head. “‘Okay’ what?”

“You can help.”

Eijirou smiles and pulls Katsuki into a tentative hug. The taller boy clings to his shirt and buries his face into his neck, inhaling shuddering breaths as his brain begins to associate the scent of Eijirou with SAFETY.

“So,” Eijirou says, pulling away. Katsuki reaches for his hand and starts to play with it absentmindedly, although the redhead doesn’t comment. “What do you normally want to do when you feel like this?”

“I jus’ cry a lot, mostly,” Katsuki mumbles. “Um... but sometimes I like t’ watch cartoons.”

“Yeah?” Eijirou says. “What’s your favorite?”

“All Might,” Katsuki answers shyly. He’s not used to embracing this side of himself.

“Well why don’t we get into our PJ’s and watch some All Might?” Eijirou suggests.

“M’kay,” Katsuki says, eyes wide as he nods.

As the two boys sit in bed watching cartoons on his laptop; Eijirou wrapping one arm around the blonde and toying with his hair, Katsuki can’t help but think this can be okay.

He sticks his thumb in his mouth.