He hadn’t considered it beforehand. All he could see in his mind’s eye was Alex’s kind face, all he could think about was the other boy’s earnest attempt to kiss him. All he could feel was regret at his reaction, desperately wanting to go back to that moment and not turn his face away in what? Surprise? Fear? Unworthiness? He hadn’t thought about where these feelings had suddenly come from, or what they meant.
He hadn’t thought twice about the urgency he felt in his chest as something deep within his being compelled him to walk along Roswell’s sidewalks, one step at a time, toward the alien museum and toward Alex. He didn’t have a plan. Only knew that he desperately needed to see the other boy despite not knowing the “why” about that either. Not that the “why” mattered much.
The question of “why” never crossed his mind. All he knew was that he wanted Alex. Wanted to talk with him, touch him, kiss him, play music with him and have inside jokes with him. Simply be in his presence and have his attention.
He hadn’t thought about their unexpected connection until now. Here, in this moment, which seemed so incredibly monumental, did he begin to wonder. But that had always been his M.O.; jump first, ask questions later.
Standing in front of each other, shirtless, nervously giggling and obviously yearning. He thought it should feel weird, awkward. Wanting this boy so badly it made him ache to his core, yet, he had never so much as glanced at another guy before. They’d grown up together, like everyone else in this town, but they’d never talked. Not really. Why him? Why now? What was this pull he felt so strongly? It wasn’t lust. Well, not just lust. He’d experienced lust before. Is this what love feels like? How could he love someone he didn’t know?
His chaos ran wild, but everything quieted when he focused on Alex’s sweet face, a shy and hopeful smile aimed right at him. Those beautiful brown eyes, looking right into his own without any hesitation, seemingly trying to communicate “I see you, the real you and I’m not afraid.” The pressure in Michael’s chest increased. Without thinking, driven by the instinct that if he touched Alex, the pressure would abate, he reached across the short distance between them to wrap his fingers around the other boy’s waist and gently pull him in, their bodies and lips pressing together more delicately than he’d ever touched anyone before.
It should have felt foreign. Feeling Alex’s jean covered erection pressing against his hip bone. But still, no thoughts of “weird and awkward” ever appeared when Alex kissed him like that, with a soft affection he’d never experienced in his entire life. He felt the other boy’s fingers in the curls on the back of his head, the metal of his many rings felt cool against the heated skin of his neck. The strands tangled around the digits, encapsulating Alex’s hand. He didn’t know they felt like silk around the other boy’s skin. He didn’t know Alex had already become addicted to that silkiness.
He also didn’t think twice before moving his hands to unbutton and unzip pants. Alex whimpered into Michael’s mouth, reveling in the relief as his constricted cock was somewhat freed. Michael moved his hands to his own pants, pulling himself out as they both stepped out of their jeans, breaking apart to kick them away, each using the other’s shoulders for balance. Giggling again, shyly smiling at each other again, blushes spreading over their cheeks like wildfire as they dared glance at each other’s underwear covered bodies.
Michael should have been reticent. This being his first time with a guy. He should have let Alex take the lead. He wasn’t even sure if Alex was a virgin or not. The previous “have you ever done this before?” line of questioning hadn’t made it back to Alex after Michael’s confession. He should have stopped to ask, but he didn’t care. Michael wasn’t reticent. He carefully walked Alex backward to the makeshift bed on the tool shed floor, and even more carefully, laid the boy on it and then laid himself on the boy.
Alex opened his legs and Michael made himself at home between them, his face finding solace in Alex’s neck as they sighed through light grinding. He could feel his guts churn in pleasure as Alex cradled him, ran his fingers through curls and over muscled shoulder blades and kissed his forehead as the grinding became needy. Michael could feel his groans vibrating off Alex’s throat and back into his own face. They were now rutting like the teenage boys they were, and he had never felt more peaceful in his life.
Through his haze, he could hear Alex breathlessly calling his name. “Guerin…fuck…stop stop” Michael slowed down. “What’s wrong?” He looked over Alex’s face for pain or anger but only saw what he construed as bliss.
“Nothing.” Alex assured with a breathless kiss to his lips. Despite his plea to stop, Alex continued to slowly thrust up into Michael. Catching his breath, he whispered “If we keep going like that, I’m gonna cum.”
Michael grinned and began his rutting again. “Then cum” he challenged. Their respective underwear were already soaked through with sweat and pre-cum, what was a full load going to hurt? He leaned down to nuzzle their noses together. “We’re 17. I don’t think stamina will be an issue” he cockily added.
Alex rolled his eyes and grinned back before grabbing Michael’s face to bring him down, solely for the purpose of shoving his tongue in his mouth. But the interlude broke the trance and Alex’s orgasm receded. Michael noticed the urgency was no longer there for Alex as they went back to grinding and groping, now replaced with simple pleasure. The thought fluttered through his mind that he should’ve been on the verge too, right there with Alex, but he was so caught up in making the human boy feel good, making sure Alex’s moans chased the rhythm he set, he hadn’t paid much attention to himself. Every cell in his body screamed at him to take care of Alex. So he would.
He lifted himself off Alex so he could remove both of their underwear, but his heart melted when Alex whined in protest, when he saw goosebumps break out over his tan skin at the loss of Michael’s heat. He held out his arms as if to pull Michael back down, like he needed him to stay warm. Needed him period. Nobody had ever needed him before.
Suddenly he felt like he’d been punched in the gut. A mental and physical bomb went off inside of him and intrinsically he knew Alex was his. His to take care of. His to love. His to protect. His to pleasure. He looked into Alex’s sweet eyes, they were widened in awe of something he couldn’t fathom. He knew Alex felt the same about him. The question rang in his head like a giant alarm “What the fuck was happening?!?! but Alex’s touch brought him back. He was hooking his legs around Michael’s waist to bring him back down. Michael went and braced his forearms on either side of Alex’s head. They looked into each other’s eyes, trying to get answers and Alex stroked Michael’s cheek with his thumb.
“What happening?” He whispered.
Michael didn’t need to ask what he meant.
“I don’t know.” He responded. “Are you scared?”
Alex shook his head no.
"I am," Michael confessed.
Alex's thumb continued stroking Michael's cheek, the gentle softness of it bringing emotional tears to Michael's eyes. "I'll take care of you" He promised. He'd felt the same pulls and compulsions as the alien boy.
Michael's eyes closed reflexively at the honest intensity of Alex's gaze. The softly spoken vow felt like a blanket being carefully draped over him, encapsulating and warming him. It was the first time he'd ever heard those words directed at him, and they came from a boy who barely even knew him.
Michael leaned back into Alex, meeting him in a gentle press of their lips before pulling away and laying his forehead on Alex's as Alex's hands moved back into his hair. He hadn't considered it beforehand, but now, in the moment, while he didn't understand what was happening, he knew their connection seemed to get stronger with each touch, each kiss, each kind gesture and loving word. That connection was forcing its way into his body and mind. It drove him to be near Alex. It kicked at him, clawed at him, demanding to be completed. Demanding a physical connection be made to enhance the spiritual. To be fully bonded.
He knew Alex felt it too. They embraced it, even if they didn’t fully understand it.
Michael kissed Alex's forehead, moving to his left cheek and continuing to kiss a trail down his neck, across his throat. When Alex pulled his head back to allow better access, Michael gently pressed his lips against the other boy's Adam's apple, his tongue carefully caressing it before moving up to his chin then finally his lips. The kiss was messy, a dance of lips and tongues and teeth and spit, but both boys moaned into it. Michael's hand slipped down between them to grip Alex under the fabric of his boxer-briefs. He threw his head back and arched up in pleasure as Michael's hand explored him, using the pad of his thumb to spread Alex's pre-cum over his cock head.
Michael seized advantage of the bared neck and once again latched his mouth onto it, sucking and licking at the warm skin, causing Alex to pulse and leak in Michael's hand.
The urge to taste Alex was overwhelming and he confessed as much, whispering his desire into Alex's ear before moving his body down Alex's until he reached his destination.
The creamy pale skin of Alex's thighs raised with goosebumps as the tips of Michael's fingers grazed them as he slid the boy’s underwear down his legs, only to unceremoniously toss them aside. Alex could only whine at his body's response to the pleasure. The alien boy took his time looking at Alex's body from this angle. He was a beautiful purplish color with a nest of dark brown hair cradling the base of the thick erect cock, which was laying against his lower stomach, beads of pre-cum slowly dripping and pooling in the trail of hair just below his belly button. He watched as it pulsed a couple of times, watched as the veins along the shaft became more prominent as Alex became more aroused. But he must have been taking in the sights without touching for too long because Alex's voice broke into his consciousness.
"Guerin, you don't have to. Not if you're not ready."
He'd seen cocks before. Couldn't escape a locker room and not see any. But this one was his responsibility and he was nervous.
He tore his eyes away from Alex’s penis to look him in the eye. “I’m just...uh…” he swallowed. Admitting weakness wasn’t in his wheelhouse. “Nervous?” Alex finished for him.
Michael grinned and nodded his head with an audible exhale. Alex raised his hand to slip his fingers through Michael’s as he sat up. He scooted closer to Michael as he kissed their intertwined fingers. “Why?” he asked. “Because it’s your first time with a guy?”
Michael thought for a split second and then looked Alex directly in the eyes.
“Because it’s my first time with you.”
Alex’s breathing hitched and his breath quickened at the admission. Michael panicked as Alex’s eyes began to pool with unshed tears. “Shit, I’m sorry Alex” Michael blurted as he moved his thumbs to Alex’s cheek, prepared to wipe the tears away should they overflow. Alex huffed a gentle laugh out as he wrapped his fingers around Michael’s wrist. “You didn’t say anything wrong.” he assured. “Sorry, crying isn’t very sexy.” he murmured quietly.
Michael gave him an “are you kidding me?” look before adding, earnestly, “Everything you do is sexy Alex.” And then the tears did spill.
Michael’s eyebrows furrowed as his thumbs caressed the human boy’s cheeks, his heart clenching at the sight of Alex in any pain. Apparently it caused him to internally flip his shit and he began to beg. “Fuck. Alex, what’s wrong? Darlin please don’t cry. Please...tell me what you need.”
Alex whimpered Michael’s name as he started to dry his eyes with his fingers, leaving light black smear marks on his cheeks from his eyeliner. He smiled at Michael as he sniffled. “Did you just call me Darlin?”
Michael smiled back. “Yeah...yeah I guess I did. You don’t like it?”
He crawled into Michael’s lap, straddling him. “I love it.” He then kissed the alien boy’s lips and pressed their foreheads together. “I’m sorry. This is so embarrassing.” he breathed against Michael’s face. “It’s just that nobody has treated me the way you treat me. And it’s happened so fast. It’s overwhelming.”
Michael knew exactly what he meant because he felt the same. He kissed Alex’s forehead. “I know. For me too.”
And it suddenly struck Michael. The intimacy of everything that has passed between them since the guitar. Alex Manes, naked, sitting on his lap on a makeshift bed on the floor of his biggoted dad’s tool shed while he poured his heart out. Alex Manes trusted him…with everything. And the irony was not lost of him. Two abused, neglected and lonely boys who didn’t trust easily, trusted each other without question.
He continued to hold Alex against his chest as he combed his fingers through the brown locks. He had to know. If he wanted to make this good for Alex, he had to ask.
He could feel Alex’s lips curve into a smile against the skin of his chest.
“Have you ever...uh, had sex...with anyone...before?
Goddamn why did he have to sound so awkward?
Alex lifted his head to look at Michael. His eyes were serious.
Michael swallowed. “Any particular reason?”
Alex whispered “Not a lot of opportunities for a guy like me in a place like this.”
“You never thought to go..” he struggled to find the right words. “...like, out of town or something?”
“I don’t want meaningless Guerin. I want to feel something real.”
Michael nodded in understanding although he never exercised the same practice. Every partner he had was a desperate attempt to feel something...anything; fun, escape, wanted, warm. Anything. Except now. Now, his goal was to make the human boy feel something real.
“Lay down” he whispered against Alex’s lips. Alex’s eyes widened but he did as requested and laid back on the makeshift bed, his head resting against the pillow as he watched Michael remove his last bit of clothing, his own underwear, and kneel in between Alex’s ankles. Alex’s eyes were glued to his cock, now soft and warm looking, as it swayed between his legs while he positioned himself. Michael saw that Alex’s, now soft as well, was beginning to stir while looking at his body and he couldn’t help but feel a little proud.
He gently draped himself over Alex’s body, both boys whimpering at the skin to skin contact, something neither often received, and he kissed Alex with every bit of purpose and feeling and emotion he could express. Alex responded in kind, his fingers sinking into Michael’s curls and gently holding his head in place. But Michael had other plans and he gradually began to travel over other parts of the human body beneath him, his mouth exploring. First his cheeks and chin. Next, his neck and chest. Alex’s body quivered with each gentle press of lips and tongue to his overheated skin. When the tip of Michael’s tongue gently rolled over Alex’s nipple, Alex’s body sharpley arched up into Michael. He couldn’t help but grin as Alex once again grabbed his hair, less gently this time, and panted “Oh Fuck...Guerin...Jesus” over and over as he involuntarily ground his hard cock against Michael’s belly as he continued to lavish attention on each erect nub.
He continued his way down with his tongue, teeth, lips and hands. He worshipped Alex’s sternum, then his stomach, next the ridge of his hips, and finally the sensitive skin on both sides of his cock, all the while Alex squirmed and panted and begged for more. Michael was awed by Alex. Nobody had ever been this senstative, this responsive to him before. He had learned early on which girls were making noises because they’d watched some porn and thought guys thought it was sexy, and which were the real deal. Alex was the real deal. There was nothing pretend or fake about him. But in the back of his mind, he couldn’t help but wonder if it was because Alex was really that into it, or because his body was affection starved and he was soaking up every single bit he could get. Maybe both.
He didn’t let it deter him. He raised his face from where it was hovering over Alex’s leaking, twitching cock to look the other boy in the eyes. “Are you ready? his voice cracked.
Alex nodded and murmured through near breathlessness. “Yeah….yes. Please Michael.”
Michael looked back down at Alex’s penis. Was he ready for this? The thought of a dick in his mouth still kind of freaked him out, but not enough to stop him from taking Alex in all at once. Alex screamed and Michael’s eyes slightly teared up as Alex bumped against the back of his throat. He backed up, letting Alex rest on his tongue for a second as he regained his composure.
“Michael? Are, are you okay?” Alex’s voice was edged with soft concern.
Michael tried to remember what he liked when girls did this for him. He focused on the taste of Alex’s slick and the smell of his skin and the feel of ridges against his tongue. He focused on the sensation of Alex’s dark wiry pubic hair tickling his face. He focused on the sound of Alex’s moan as he hummed and vibrated “mmm-hmmm” around his cock in response to his question.
Alex was still looking at him with worried, pupil blown eyes as Michael did a little experiment and ran the tip of his tongue along the underside of Alex’s penis, straight up to the tip, circled the head and swiped over the slit. The result of the experiment was Alex grabbing Michael’s curls all while letting out a string of curses that made Michael chuckle around the dick in his mouth.
“Fuck Guerin. Stop teasing me.” Alex panted as his fingers gently massaged Michael’s scalp in an implicit apology.
In response, Michael buckled down and began to give Alex what he wanted. He sucked and licked and drooled on and massaged and stroked every bit of Alex’s groin. It never seemed to be enough for either though. Alex continued to pant and moan beneath him, his fingers tangling in curls as his hips thrust up, trying to get deeper inside of Michael’s mouth. Conversely, Michael never felt like he was getting enough of Alex inside either. At one point, when Alex had lifted his hips in an effort to thrust up, Michael slid his hands under his ass. Now, he kneaded the flesh there, pressing Alex up, trying to get more of Alex’s...he didn’t know what, though. He was practically suffocating with the human boy’s cock down his throat and it still wasn’t enough. He’d never been so hungry for something in his entire life.
Michael’s ears were ringing from his neediness, his lack of air and Alex’s smell surrounding his nose. He barely heard the other boy frantically calling his name before a flood of hot, bitter, salty liquid poured into his mouth and down his throat. Instinctively he swallowed it, or as much as he could but there was too much and he felt as some of it spilled out of his mouth, running over his chin and dripping onto Alex’s balls.
He felt dazed and sleepy as Alex began to pull away, pull out. But he was still strong enough to hold him, refusing to let him leave his mouth just yet. Not ready to give up the feeling of warmth in his chest that came with the feeling of a part of Alex’s body being inside of his own body. Alex whimpered and convulsed as Michael’s tongue began to gently lap against his rapidly softening, over sensitive cock. When finally, he was completely deflated, the alien boy carefully released him. And as he licked the now cold cum off Alex’s balls, he nuzzled the soft penis with his nose, pressing a gentle kiss to the shaft and then the tip before laying his head against the delicate skin of Alex’s inner thigh. He closed his eyes and waited for his breathing to catch up with him. Alex’s fingers stroked his hair during, pushing it off of his forehead like he always imagined someone who loved him would do.
He didn’t know how long they’d lain there, reveling in each other, Alex recovering from the most intense orgasm he’d ever experienced. Felt like hours. Hours of pure peace as he lightly dozed, feeling safe and unafraid that Alex would think he was weird for sleeping on him after a blowjob. There was no shame between them.
Eventually though, he was brought out of his haze by a soft calling of his name.
“Guerin.” Alex ventured. “Michael” he tried again. He ran his fingers over the alien boy’s arms, gently pressing the flesh as he called a third time. “Michael, Baby. My leg is asleep”
Not wanting to cause Alex discomfort, Michael reluctantly sat up and Alex sat up beside him, moving his leg in and out in an attempt to get the blood flowing. Michael’s fingers gently hooked on his chin and turned his head. Their eyes met, for the first time since Michael had gone down on him, and they both smiled at what they found there. Happiness. They leaned into kissing each other, Alex’s tongue finding its way to Michael’s mouth to see if there was any trace of himself still there. There was and he tasted himself without care or worry.
The kiss broke and Michael murmured against his lips “Baby?”
“You don’t like it?” Alex echoed from earlier. “I know it’s not very original.”
“I love it.” Michael echoed before pressing his lips against Alex’s neck. Alex giggled and shuddered as goosebumps broke out over his skin as Michael’s stubble tickled him. Michael smiled against Alex’s neck at his giggle, thinking it the most adorable sound he’d ever heard.
Michael raised his head and kissed Alex again on the mouth. Michael felt Alex tilt his body, lean further into Michael as the kiss deepend. He wrapped his fingers around the back of Alex’s neck, stroking his hair under his fingertips as Alex began to crawl on top of him, straddling him.
Again, that nagging feeling in his gut sprang up. That “It's not enough, I want to consume you, I need to crawl inside of you and never leave you” feeling about Alex that both tortured and pleased him.
And as that feeling grew within him, Alex’s kisses began to become deeper, his touches more needy, his grinding more frantic. He buried his face in Michael’s neck and breathed in deeply as he pressed his body tightly against the alien boy’s. Almost like he was trying to burrow in.
Just like Michael didn’t know the human boy had quickly developed an addiction to his hair, he also didn’t know that Alex's new Michael Guerin addiction included Michael’s smell. And as Alex’s face smushed against Michael’s neck, under his curls, he inhaled, deeply huffing in the smell of a summer rainstorm and became intoxicated, high on Michael.
Michael sat still and let Alex get his fill, not sure what was going on, but taking pride in the fact that the human boy was once again hard and leaking against him as he wildly rutted against him while extensively kissing his neck and running his fingers through his hair.
He’d been hard, so achingly hard since he laid eyes on Alex in the ticket booth, with his eyeliner and piercings and dorky green and black visor that he made look sexy. He’d held back, desperately wanting to make Alex feel so good that he’d ignored his own needs, but now, as Alex ground against him, their cocks rubbing a sweet friction against each other coupled with Alex’s weight on him, his skin against him, his mouth on his sensitive neck, his fingers gently tugging on his hair, causing a tingling on his scalp that shouldn’t feel as good as it did, he loses control.
And he can’t help it. He feels his balls draw up, that familiar tightness in his belly and a shooting jolt in his lower spine. He wraps his arms around Alex’s lower back and squeezes tightly, the skin of Alex’s shoulder muffling his voice as he shouts “Fuck! God! Alex! Darlin! Alex! Fuck!” all while spurting hard and high between them, coating both of their bellies and chests.
Alex, surprised at the sudden orgasm, wrapped Michael in his arms, stroking his upper back and whispering “I got you Baby. I got you” against honey blond curls as the other boy shuddered and convulsed against him.
He rested his head against Alex’s shoulder in the afterglow, letting calm wash over him. Nobody, ever, not any of his other sex partners, nor Max or Isabelle, held him like this. He thought he would be uncomfortable if someone ever did. Not because he didn’t want it, but because he thought he didn’t deserve it. And again, as if Alex knew what he was feeling, he began to slowly rock them back and forth. He whispered, into Michael’s scalp, over and over again, “I got you. I got you. I got you.” Michael only held onto Alex tighter.
Eventually, Michael’s grip began to loosen and he all he wanted to do was look at that face he loved so much. And the thought occurred to him that his mind supplied the word “love” in conjunction with Alex’s face, but he wasn’t shocked or afraid. He’d kinda known for days that he loves all of Alex, not just his face. It was what it was. Funnily enough, he didn’t really know Alex. Only had a handful of short conversations with him. But that didn’t seem to matter. He inherently knew Alex was meant for him.
What scared him more was the fact that Alex loves him back. For so many reasons, he was terrified that Alex felt this connection in the same way he did because no one could ever know about him. About who he really is. He knew Alex wouldn’t care. Wouldn’t be afraid or hateful. But he would be putting him in harm’s way. Maybe not today, but at some point down the road, the knowledge would fall into the wrong hands and Alex would be hurt in some way. He couldn’t bear the thought.
But he was weak. And he wanted the boy too badly not to be selfish. He pushed his thoughts away and looked into Alex’s face. He reached up and ran his thumbs over his chapped lips and his fingers over those high cheekbones. Alex leaned into the touches, eager for any attention Michael gave him. “Sorry” Michael softly uttered.
Alex’s brows furrowed in concern. “What for?”
Michael glanced down between them, to where Alex was still straddling his lap, to direct Alex’s gaze toward the quickly drying semen on each of their torsos that neither had bothered to clean off yet.
“I didn’t mean to. I wanted to last longer for you.”
Alex smiled and looked back up. “It was hot.”
Michael smiled back. “Really?”
“You, coming untouched?” Alex’s brows rose up his forehead in the same way they had when he’d given him the guitar. “Absolutely.”
“Besides” he continued, “We’re 17. I don’t think stamina will be an issue” he replied with a shit eating grin before giving Michael a quick peck.
Michael also grinned at his own words being thrown back to him by Alex, the smart ass. Without thinking about it, Michael playfully slapped Alex’s left ass cheek. The human boy looked momentarily surprised and Michael froze for a second, panicked that he had crossed a line. But Alex’s face relaxed and Michael’s heart beat slowed as Alex gave him another peck on the lips and said “You stay here. Relax.”
With that, he climbed off of Michael’s lap, both men stretching stiff muscles. Michael laid back against the pallet and watched as Alex made his way around the large shed. First, he went over to the side of the couch and pulled out a couple of water bottles from a cooler. He tossed one to Michael as he unscrewed the cap on his own and began to drink. Then, he made his way over to a little chest in the corner and opened it. Michael caught sight of a few towels and sheets in the chest. Alex pulled out a washcloth, dumped some of the water from his bottle on it, then proceeded to clean the dried jizz off his stomach, grimacing at the feel of cold water on his skin. Michael was mesmerized through it all as Alex used more of the water from his bottle to rinse off the now dirty rag and walk over to hand it to Michael to use for the same purpose.
During the few days he’d stayed here, he’d become familiar with some of the stuff Alex left inside the shed, but he’d never considered how much of a sanctuary it really was for him.
Michael wondered how much time Alex spent here. He had a cooler filled with water and snacks, a makeshift bed, extra bedding for it and other linen. His school books and notebooks were in here and his guitar, as well as a few changes of clothing, nail polish, make-up and some other toiletries. He lived out of this tool shed the same way Michael lived out of his truck. The thought broke his heart. At least it was four walls and a roof though.
Michael was lost in his thoughts when Alex’s voice brought him to attention. Alex had his back to the room and was kneeling down on the hard floor, rummaging around in what looked to be a little lock box inside of a little hidey hole. Michael was admiring Alex’s toned back. He was a bit thin, but his shoulders were broad and his skin was a glowing tan color. Even from his distance he could see a fair number of scars on Alex’s back, ass and the back of his thighs. “Belts” his brain supplied. He had the same scars...and more. Again, he felt that now familiar feeling in his gut. Something in him, reaching out to Alex, yearning for him, hungry for connection. His heart skipped and his dick twitched.
“Hmmm?” he uttered back at Alex’s comment, too lost in thought to hear any actual words.
Alex turned around and stood up, whatever was in his hands, he was now hiding behind his back. For the first time, he got to see Alex standing while completely naked and he blatantly stared. He was half hard already, for seemingly no reason other than he was in Michael’s proximity. And then he did the most Goddamn adorable thing he’d ever seen anyone do. Alex blushed under Michael’s gaze. And not just a little red in the cheeks. His entire body lit up with heat and his skin glowed pink. The human boy’s gaze fell to the floor in shyness.
Michael thought it was sweet considering everything they had done over the past hour, that Alex was still somewhat innocent. He put his hands behind his head stretched out on the pallet, letting Alex look at him too. It was only fair. The difference was that Michael didn’t blush. Michael watched as the human boy’s eyes roamed over his form, saw his breathing hitch and his cock go from a semi erect to fully erect. Just from looking at his naked body. He couldn’t help the cocky grin that spread across his face. Just because he was suddenly sappily in love doesn’t mean he still wasn’t Michael Guerin.
Michael removed one hand from behind his head and held it out, beckoning to Alex.
“Whatdya say Darlin?” He asked as he pulled Alex down on him, letting Alex once again straddle him.
Alex braced himself with his right hand on Michael’s chest while his left hand stayed behind his back. “I, um…” Michael watched as he trailed off, trying to organize his thoughts.
Michael could feel Alex’s nervousness as if it were his own. “You can tell me anything Alex.”
“It’s more like something I wanted to ask you” Alex said.
He sat up, back into that familiar position they had been in before, looked right into Alex’s eyes and said “Whatever you want, it's yours.” He waited a beat before deciding to throw caution to the wind “Whatever you wanna know, I’ll tell you.”
Alex whispered “Me too...with me. Anything you want Michael.”
They sealed the vow with a kiss and Michael felt that tug again. But now that line between them was a bit smaller; The distance shorter.
Michael hands ran down Alex’s flanks and he asked “What did you wanna ask me?”
“Well…” Alex still hesitated. Not out of fear of Michael’s reaction, but just the sheer embarrassment of it. Michael’s hands gave his thighs a squeeze of encouragement.
“You know I’ve never done....it...before.” Michael nodded, urging him to go on without interrupting.
“Penetration I mean.” He blushed again profusely but continued.
“And I know you haven’t either, with...uh, a guy.”
“Yeah?” Michael responded, already forming an idea of what Alex was trying to ask.
“Can I….Can I fuck you?” He brought his hand out from behind his back to reveal lube and condoms. Yep, he was definitely in the ballpark of what he thought Alex wanted but before he could answer, Alex kept talking.
“Look, I know you’ve never thought about guys that way before, and the idea probably freaks you out and if you’re not comfortable it’s totally okay. We can still do other stuff.”
Michael reached out and put his hands on either side of Alex’s cheeks to get his attention. He wanted this. God he wanted Alex inside of him the moment they kissed in the museum. He wanted to be inside of Alex. They’d been trying to crawl into each other all afternoon.
“You’re not just a guy Alex. You’re you. I wanna do everything with you.”
Alex’s face broke into a shy grin. “Everything?”
“I trust you.” The alien boy admitted. “And...I don’t exactly trust easily.” Alex nodded his head in perfect understanding. “And I wasn’t lying before Darlin. Whatever you want from me, you can have it.” He leaned up to kiss Alex’s lips, then his forehead.
“Alex Manes?” Michael asked with a mischievous smile. “Will you be my first?”
“Only if you’ll be mine.” Alex responded.
And then they kissed; kissed soft and sweet and like they had all the time in the world. They kissed until they were both hard and leaking and desperate for friction. With an extreme amount of effort, Michael broke away, trying to catch his breath and let some fog clear when he whispered. “How should we do it? I only know the basics, not the details.”
Alex’s hands scrambled for purchase on Michael’s shoulders as he too struggled to breathe.
“You, um, you should be on top. Like bottom from the top. That way you can control it since it's your first time.” Michael nodded and uttered “Okay.”
Alex continued “But, when I prep you, you should lay on your stomach.”
Wordlessly they began to disentangle themselves so Michael could flip to his front. Once settled, with a pillow under his pelvis and his erect penis arranged in a more comfortable position, Alex laid against his legs and began to stroke his back, his ass and his thighs. His lips and tongue followed the trail of his fingers, over and over again. Michael felt comforted despite the feeling of roiling of excitement and nerves simmering in his gut.
“Are you ready?” Alex breathed.
“Yeah” he breathed.
“Raise your hips a bit. Stick your ass up.”
Michael did as he was told, leaving a trail of sticky pre-cum smeared against the pillow. He heard the cap on the container of lube pop and heard the squirt as Alex coated his index finger. Then he heard Alex say “Sorry, this is going to be cold” in enough time for him to brace himself for the sensation of cold lube being carefully poured over his asshole.
His heart was pounding and he could feel his hole clenching and contracting involuntarily in anticipation of Alex’s finger entering him. Alex leaned over him once again, kissing his lips, nuzzling his nose and giving him instructions to relax. “Don’t fight it.” he advised. “Tell me if it’s too much or you need me to stop.”
Michael nodded, “I trust you.”
Alex once again kneeled behind Michael and ran his hand over Michael’s cheeks, kneading them and spreading them. He felt the tip of the human boy’s finger carefully rub against his pucker. He could feel the slick as he slid his finger along his crack, up and down and back again, exploring. He couldn’t describe the feeling. Amazing and strange and awkward and natural all at the same time. Then Alex’s finger came to a rest over his hole, and traced around it, letting Michael know he was about to go in.
Michael reflexively closed tightly around the tip of Alex’s finger, refusing him further entrance. Alex kissed his ass cheek and gently told him to relax again. Michael let out a breath. Alex slipped in just a bit further. His breathing was heavy, his dick quickly softening, but he wanted this too bad to stop before it even started.
But like magic, Alex knew what he needed, a distraction. He cried out when he felt Alex’s tongue tracing along the underside of his ball sac, licking his perineum and gently sucking his testicles into his mouth. His hands gripped each side of the pillow and he cursed and moaned as Alex’s finger slowly sank deeper and deeper into him while he tortured him with his mouth.
At last, Alex’s finger couldn’t go any further and Michael was a mess of precum and lube and slobber. They were just getting started.
Alex ran his other hand through Michael’s hair. “Are you okay? Do you want me to keep going?”
Michael barely answered with a coherent “more” and wiggled his ass. So Alex began to slowly withdraw his finger, being more careful with Michael than he’d ever been with anything in his life. Once he reached the tip, he just as gently pushed it back in and Michael keened beneath him. And it progressed like this for what seemed like hours. Alex fingering Michael open with one, and then two and then three until Michael was sure he was going to die from the want. Because no matter how much he stretched, or burned, or fit in, it was never enough. He never felt full enough. He needed Alex’s cock. He even whined and cried for it but Alex refused, too afraid of hurting him. He said he wanted to do it right. All Michael wanted was more of this feeling, not caring how much it hurt.
Finally, his beautiful torturer deemed him ready.
“Flip over” he whispered as he wiped dirty fingers on a rag before tossing it away. “Switch with me.”
During the transition of Alex taking Michael’s spot on the bed and Michael moving to straddle Alex’s hips, Michael grabbed the human boy’s hair and maneuvered him into a kiss. He thrust his tongue into Alex’s mouth and licked and sucked every part he could. It wasn’t pretty and it wasn’t good but the need radiating through his entire body drove him to consume as much of Alex as he could get his hands and mouth on. Alex, the sweetest, most gentle boy in the world, pushed back in equal force, in equal aggression, because he was feeling exactly what Michael was feeling.
He began to rock back onto Alex’s penis, letting the leaking precum leave a trail of slick down his ass cheeks and he passed over Alex’s tip, back and forth, up and down. Just as he felt the blunt head beginning to squeeze into his crack, Alex broke the kiss, gasping for air, pulling his hips away from Michael’s ass and trying to string words together.
“Fuck...Guerin...no, not...we need a condom.” He winced as he closed his eyes as his head fell back onto the pillow.”
Michael collapsed onto Alex. Fuck, he got so caught up, he’d completely forgotten. It didn’t matter because he was an alien and never contracted human diseases or illnesses, but Alex didn’t know that.
“I’m clean” Michael kissed into his neck and left it at that.
Alex, intrinsically knowing Michael would always protect him, simply said, “okay” then pulled him in for another kiss as his hips swivelled to once again catch his cock in the other boy’s crevice. Each sighed into the kiss as they felt the warm and slippery skin on skin contact.
Alex reached between them and grabbed himself, purposefully moving his penis over Michael’s sensitive skin, spreading slick, building pleasure and anticipation for both of them while the alien boy whined and groaned into his mouth. He placed the blunt head against Michael’s stretched hole but didn’t press in. Michael broke their kiss and gasped.
“I’m gonna stay still for you Guerin, and you sink down at your own pace. Okay Baby?”
Michael kissed his lips once more, nodded, and said “Yeah.”
He wanted to say “God, I fucking love you so fucking much.” He needed to say “You’re so beautiful Darlin.” He ached to say “I want to marry you and have your babies” which made his stomach drop because for all he knew, he could possibly carry children. He wanted to beg “Never leave me” but it all got stuck in his throat.
Instead he hovered his head above Alex’s. He wanted to see his face as he sank onto him. He braced his left hand on Alex’s chest, right above his heart while his right hand rested on the pillow next to Alex’s head. And as Alex breached him, coming to and passing that first ring of muscle, a feeling Michael had no words for overtook him. Alex’s eyes widened and his hands came to grip Michael’s hips so hard he could feel the bruises already beginning to form. “Evidence” he thought. He watched as Alex held his breath and his body still, and he knew that the boy was making a gargantuan effort not to thrust up, not to be selfish and take what he wanted.
But the burn of his stretching ass was too sweet and the fever spreading through his body was too perfect and the vibrating of what he could only assume was his soul was too intense for him to go slow. He wanted more of these feelings. He was not as selfless as Alex. And so he sank.
And Alex’s eyes rolled back into his head, his breath gushed out of him in a gaspmoancurse and his hands scrambled to Michaels’ hair, giving it a good tug as he brought the alien boy in for a kiss. Later, for a couple days after, Michael would still feel the ache in his ass, the sting of his scalp and the soreness of the 10 tiny finger shaped bruises on his hips, and the bliss that brought them would ease the pain of the memories of other aches, stings and sorenesses inflicted on him in hate.
Alex broke the kiss, some of his sense regained. “What the fuck Guerin?! Are you okay?” Worry saturated his voice and face as his hands ran over Michael’s chest and arms, seemingly checking for injuries where logically he knew there would be none. He grabbed one of Alex’s hands and kissed his knuckles, his eyes meeting Alex’s .
“Never better.” he whispered into the palm of Alex’s hand before tracing the lines with his lips and tongue, causing Alex’s breath to hitch again. He leaned up to kiss Michael’s forehead, nuzzling his cheek and murmuring into Michael’s ear “Never do that again” before pushing a curl out of his face. Michael nodded, hating the concern and and fear on Alex’s face, but loving the look for pure bliss he’d shown just after he’d bottomed out.
Alex lay back down, “Just take a minute okay? Move slowly.”
So they lay there, for just a moment, the most serene moment of his life, with his hand still firmly placed over Alex’s heart and his face buried in Alex’s neck while Alex stroked his back and inhaled the scent of his hair. With Alex still buried fully inside of him. With him still dripping slick onto Alex’s belly.
But it didn’t take long until both needed to feel movement and Michael raised his face from Alex’s neck and without saying a word, slowly and carefully lifted himself up. They both groaned as they felt nerve endings catching fire with the friction rubbing against each inch. Then Michael reached the tip and began to slide back down to the base before his body could completely release Alex. As he once again sank into Alex, he felt like he was sinking into a warm bath. A warmth and comfort slowly enveloped him.
He also felt full and complete but at the same time empty and incomplete. Like he knew there was more to share between them and he desperately wanted it but didn’t know what it was and therefore couldn’t figure out how to get it. “Or maybe,” he thought, “I’m just being stupid and needy.”
They continued on slowly like that. Each gentle and worshiping in their touches and kisses. It was like nothing Michael had ever experienced during fucking before. But then again, this wasn’t fucking.
Then, Alex’s hand ventured down between them to wrap around his neglected dick and everything changed. With the first stroke, Michael’s body involuntarily convulsed in pleasure and he slammed down onto Alex at a different angle, deeper than even that first plunge, which caused Alex to brush against something inside of him.
And then he lost control.
He clamped down on Alex and he felt his hand burning where it rested on Alex’s chest. More burning and heat and fever than he’d normally felt being around Alex. He was trying to focus on Alex’s blurry face as he threw his head back against the pillow, eyes closed tightly. Tried to focus on his voice. He could hear it, but it sounded far away, gasping for breath between each frantic call of his name.
Then his vision blacked out for a split second before the darkness was replaced with images of himself at this age, going back to when he was a kid and coming back to Roswell. He saw flashes of his messy curls and himself in dirty clothes and images of himself laughing with little Max and little Isobel, then all alone on the playground, holding back angry tears because nobody wanted to play with him. He saw little Alex, looking at him and somehow he felt Alex’s sadness for him, his desire to talk to him but being too afraid and too shy to approach.
Then the flashes switched to Alex’s life. Images of his mother leaving when he was five and his father shoving him hard against a wall when he was 13, the fear he felt. He saw 16 year old Alex cuddling between Liz and Maria in a booth at the Crashdown as he happily dunked his fries into his chocolate milkshake. He saw it all. Images of both of them; throughout their lives. Happiness, sadness, fear, embarrassment, distrust, love, hope. But more importantly, he felt it. Every bit of it as everything bombarded him at a speed he couldn’t comprehend. And then he felt lust. An image of Alex from three weeks ago secretly looking at him when he didn’t think anyone was watching. After Alex opened his secret safe place to him. Alex, sitting on a campus picnic table on a warm, spring sunny day in his black jeans and black boots and tight red shirt and his eyeliner and gelled hair, looking at him with wonder and awe and confusion and raw desire.
He somehow knew that everything he was seeing and feeling was being mirrored back to Alex. Alex knew Michael was seeing and feeling his feelings. But now Alex also saw all the times Michael secretly looked at him.
He felt love. Strong, unbreakable, stubborn, innocent, pure, unselfish. What Alex felt for him.
It was over just as fast as it had begun.
His vision returned to normal. He was breathing heavily, taking stock, trying to figure out what just happened. He was still on top of Alex, Alex still inside of him. Alex panting and sweating just as much as he was. His face confused but not scared. The proof of his own orgasm splattered between them. The proof of Alex’s orgasm dripping down his thigh, escaping his plugged ass as Alex softened. His hand, no longer burning but now cool and pleasant against their heated skin.
He slowly lifted it, his eyes widening as he saw the glow on Alex’s brown skin. A handprint. His handprint. Iridescently shining and sparkling on top of his heart.
Alex gently grabbed his face, demanding his focus, his attention. “Michael. Fuck Guerin...look at me.” Michael tore his eyes away from the print. “Are you okay? What just happened? It felt like my chest was on fire.” Michael felt Alex’s panic just as he felt Alex’s effort to push it away in order to take care of Michael.
“Did you feel it too?” The human boy asked. “I saw...” he trailed off. “I felt…everything.” His fingers brushed his cheek. Michael was too stunned to answer. “Baby…” he begged, kissing and hugging a stunned Michael.
Finally Michael whispered “Your chest....I’m sorry Alex, I didn’t know.” Alex looked down for the first time to see what Michael was talking about and felt the air leave him. Alex felt shame and fear and disgust. But it wasn’t his own. He somehow knew it was Michael’s.
Alex ran his fingers over the handprint, mesmerized by the glow and sparkle. He didn’t know what it was, but he knew it came from Michael and that meant it had to be something good. He put his hand against it, matching up his hand with Michael’s print.
“You think it's beautiful?” Michael breathed?
Alex looked back up at him, then took his hand, intertwining their fingers and then Michael felt a wave of acceptance and love wash over him. “How do I know what you’re feeling?” Alex asked. “How did you do this?”
“I don’t know. It’s never happened before.”
Alex’s eyes met his and searched them. “Cosmic.”
“What?” Michael responded.
“During...I uh, one of the feelings I got. You’re not from Earth, are you?”
“How are you not freaked?” Alex never said he wasn’t, but Michael knew it anyway.
“Because it’s you.” Alex brushed Michael’s curls back. “I saw you. All of you. And I think you saw me too.”
Michael breathed out “Yeah.”
“You love me.” Alex stated as if it were a simple fact.
Alex laid back down, pulling Michael down with him, heedless of the mess on their bodies, dried semen mere inches away from the handprint. Michael rested his head against Alex’s chest and threw his arm around him, snuggling against him as Alex gently combed through Michael’s curls.
They lay there, lightly dozing, in no hurry to move, to part from one another. He could feel when Alex awoke from his post intensely emotional and physically overwhelming orgasm nap. He felt when Alex’s hand reached between them and ran his fingers over Michael’s penis. It would have been funny how fast he reacted to the light touch if it weren’t for the fact that he could feel how horny Alex was. How horny just thinking about Michael made him.
He twitched and could feel Alex smile against his forehead. He continued to lazily stroke him, careful to avoid too much friction until he got slick enough. Michael began to whimper and moan at the feel of the touch on his sensitive skin, at the wave of desire that rolled through his body and down his spine. He knew it was both his and Alex’s desire tangled together and he knew Alex felt it too.
They met in a kiss and both melted into it. Their kisses before had always been intense, but now it felt like coming home. Like safety mixed with reckless passion and love. Always love.
Alex turned onto his side, facing Michael and pressed their bodies together before breaking the kiss. Michael immediately moved to nuzzle and suck on Alex’s neck.
“Do you think when we do it again, the same thing will happen?”
Michael stopped and pulled his lips away from Alex’s neck and nuzzled his nose.
“Only one way to find out.” He reached over and grabbed the lube off of the floor next to the pallet. “And it’s your turn.”
Alex smiled, rolled his eyes and furiously blushed. But he also lay back down, pulling Michael between his legs. And just like before, Michael made himself at home between them and inside of him.
He had so many questions. What was this bond thing exactly? And how long would it last? And could they connect whenever they wanted? How long could he hide it from Max and Isobel? But his mind went blank as Alex kissed his neck, ground against him and sent him a wave of calming peace.
He didn’t need answers now. The question of “why” had never crossed his mind with regard to Alex because the universe knew better than he did. And you didn’t question the cosmos when they gave you a beautiful boy as a soulmate.