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re:Birth

Chapter Text

            —This is a story about a girl.

            Even in all her uncertainty, one thing was still clear.
            —The newly crowned queen raised her sword and turned her army toward the empire.
            …They would attack again, even without all the people’s talk of portents, and she could not allow the danger to her country.
            So she must strike first.

            …She didn’t have absolute confidence that she could win, but she believed wholeheartedly in the justice she had been promised, and she gathered her forces to strike.
            The borderline between their countries was bottlenecked so that she must get through the empire’s great fortress to so much as touch its land.
            It took a great campaign and weeks’ worth of battle, but eventually a successful plan was put in motion and the fortress gates breached.
            …In that battle, a number of powerful enemies were killed.
            In the end a plan was put into motion to flood the fortress, and amidst the chaos she led her troops to a resounding victory that made her feel as though for the first time she and her army truly had the advantage in the war.
            Her men cheered as she rallied her forces before the empire’s gates, buoyed up as she was by the feeling that as long as they had her sword and her power and her justice on their side then they could never lose.
            …But.
            At that time, one of her warriors stepped forward.
            —She was told that this was good enough.
            —She was told clearly that this was the point of no return, and that moving forward would be an action that was unforgivable.

            The one that said so was not formally attached to her army, but a friend of one of her allies who often came to their aid in times of need.
            …She was a warrior who had grown up in the barren land resulting from an ancient war.
            She was a descendant of the people the queen’s ancestors had exiled to that land, and had never thought much of the kingdom, but over the course of their journeys something like respect had been born between the two.
            Even so.
            The girl who had never hesitated to say unpleasant things to the queen condemned her.
            …That this was as far as she could go.
            …That if she moved forward through the enemy’s gate, the kingdom would become exactly the same as the empire.

            She spoke cold words that reduced the queen’s promised justice to a mere fairy tale.

            …She was confused.
            Of course the queen was confused.
            …Such a thing couldn’t be, and she could not understand it.
            She had learned to control her desire for vengeance, and she only sought to protect her people, not to hurt innocents or tear families apart.

            She had once been told that a sovereign must protect her kingdom, whatever the cost.
            …She finally understood those words.
            This was her duty, as someone who loved and wished to protect her homeland—

            And so.
            She argued back calmly, asking what then she should do.
            …Of course, there was no answer.
            The warrior standing across from her only repeated that what she planned to do was mistaken.
            …She didn’t believe so, but even if it was a mistake, someone had to make it.
            She could not risk her people.
            …The queen closed her eyes and remembered the night her capital fell, let her heart fill with the agony of her citizens—
            —and she opened her eyes and walked through the gate without hesitation.

            She walked through the gate,
            and passed into hell.

            They hadn’t realized it at the time.
            No, perhaps they had not wanted to realize it.
            …It was just that over the course of the war, while no important generals in the queen’s army had lost their lives, they had killed a number of the empire’s most prominent leaders.
            The magus the queen had killed personally in her struggle against kidnap, the knights who had died when her army fought to take her back, and now the defensive leaders of the imperial army who had died attempting to protect the country’s gates—
            The enemy’s numbers were not infinite, despite the size of the country.
            …No, to the contrary, most of the enemy army had already been destroyed.
            The few platoons the emperor had at his disposal were most likely attempting to fortify the capital city, which was only a few days’ march from the great fortress of the border.
            …And the emperor himself had been wounded in battle when trying to prevent her coronation and couldn’t ride forth personally.

            They hadn’t realized it at the time.
            …But when their march through the empire’s territory was interrupted by an armed force, perhaps she begun to understand.
            It wasn’t an army.
            …It was a group of farmers holding weapons they obviously weren’t familiar with, led by a pair of spirited youths.
            The civilian militia called for her to retreat.
            She and her forces were called invaders and thieves.
            The people of the empire swore that if it took all their lives they would keep their precious homeland and the leader they loved safe.

            …She had not been prepared.
            There had been times that the young queen had experienced uncertainty before, but it was nothing compared to this.
            She could not retreat, especially after what she had said to her ally, but she did not want to harm civilians with no sins to their name.
            For the sake of her country, she must move forward without hesitation.
            …Probably, she thought, these people had been inspired by propaganda and were not truly prepared to do battle.
            If her forces engaged them, they should scatter—

            What resulted,
            was the greatest massacre the war had ever seen.

            When the battle ended, she stood atop a hill of corpses.
            It was not the first time she had done so, but this time she was bewildered by the extent of the bloodshed.
            —Why?
            She wanted to ask them why they were willing to go so far for that man, but somewhere deep down she had already begun to understand.
            …It was, because they had something they desired to protect.
            The young girl who had led her people into battle was much the same as she had once been.

            As they continued, still more civilians stood up with weapons in hand.
            …A single deployment of the imperial army, led by the final great general left to the enemy, had also appeared to try to defend the people.
            And she cut them all down.
            The farmers and the blacksmiths, the trappers and tanners, the husbands and wives and children and parents.
            The tired soldiers who had fought at the fortress, fought in the villages, and fought here in the marshes that were the only obstacle left in the way of the capital city.
            The enemy general, a girl younger than herself whose body was covered in wounds.
            …All of them fell beneath the sword her people had promised her was justice.

            …But with every swing of her sword, she also cut away at her own certainty.
            Perhaps she was retaliating for the pain that had been inflicted upon her own country, but it couldn’t possibly be justice or the right thing to do to end so many innocent lives.
            Could this, truly be called justice?
            …Still, she had to believe.
            If she let her belief crumble now, she would collapse under the weight of her own despair, remembering her past uncertainties.

            At last her army stood before the gates of the capital.
            Her will to fight had dwindled so much that she was willing to attempt negotiation, something she had never before considered trying with her enemy.

            —But.

            As she stood across the wide road from the young emperor, he did not believe her offerings of peace, and was deaf to her demands for his surrender.
            He held his head high and condemned her, telling her that after how badly each had wounded the other, this could only end in his death or her own.
            …She who had often heard his voice in her days of captivity realized it.
            His words were heavy with grief even as he protected his country’s pride.
            …The general she had killed in the previous battle had been his sister, a small girl who was still years away from adulthood.
            He had taken her parents away from her and forced her to learn fear and pain and suffering.
            …And in return, she had killed his lover, his friends, and his family one by one.

            The wheels of destiny were as ever turned by great rivers of blood.
            …By now, it was blood that she and this man had personally spilled with the edge of the sword.
            Truly, they were no different.

            She had become the murderer, and he the tragic hero casting his own life between her sword and his people.
            —But still, she could not turn back.
            Certainly, if she turned back here he would simply amount his forces once more and strike for her country yet again in time.
            ……And so the young queen fought the bloodiest battle of the war while suppressing the urge to cry.

            Through the connection thinner than a capillary, I watch.
            Her heart was in the right place, but there were so many things she hadn’t been taught.
            She learned them all the hard way, ran through the battlefield, and cradled her regrets.
            She was still a young woman who had not yet turned eighteen, but she could not be called anything but an adult.
            At the same time, she is both greater than humanity and very much an ordinary girl.
            This is…, her memory.

            …In the end.
            Just as the battle had come to a deadlock, one of her allies—
            The very girl who had spoken out against this invasion stood up.
            She called for the army of the kingdom not to lose heart.
            …And as the queen watched numbly, she broke the enemy’s gates with her own life.

            ……At last it had come to this.

            She must move forward.
            …No matter how painful it became, there were lives that had been given to forge her path and the hopes of many resting on her shoulders.
            …The queen lifted the sword she was losing her faith in.
            She lifted her sword and charged forward into the final battle—

            …
            ……I wake.
            I awaken with a dizzy head after an unbelievable dream.
            …I feel almost as though someone has wrapped my head in cotton, and my senses are muddled.
            …Well, this much is probably just because of how much energy Yggdra used last night.
            Just as I observed the morning after I summoned her, that energy has to come from somewhere.
            Music is playing faintly and it appears I’ve slept through when my alarm originally went off, so I must have been sleeping quite deeply.
            Either that, or when Yggdra’s memories take hold of me in my dreams they must just hate to let go of my consciousness.
            I space out in bed with heavy limbs and a head that isn’t working right and listen to Handel.
            I listen until the very end of the symphony and then drag myself up, forcing myself to shut the music off.

            I’m in charge of breakfast today, Yggdra is in charge of lunch, and Ein will be cooking dinner according to our schedule.
            …I’ll have to make something with a lot of calories and sugar to give us the energy to think.
            Thinking that, I wash my face and get dressed, and go downstairs.
            It appears that I’m the first one, and so I have time to get cooking equipment and materials out slowly without losing face.
            …For the main dish, pancakes with nuts and fruit mixed in.
            This will be a healthy western-style breakfast with all the stops pulled out.
            On the side, fried bacon and scrambled eggs seasoned with herbs and sea salt, and finally crepes, as a real dessert.

            Most of the other things will be easy to do quickly, and so I give all of my attention to the pancake mix.
            …The house slowly starts to stir as the smell of the ingredients wakes up my guests.

            Rose is the first one down.
            She seems more awake than me, and I allow myself to be privately envious as she greets me and sits down in the living room with a book.
            …Yggdra is next, and she definitely isn’t fully awake.
            She’s dressed, but she hasn’t tied her hair and her eyes are lidded.
            She is so beautiful that I want to pull her into a side room right now, but—
            Well, sex when one participant isn’t fully awake is something that should wait until you’re in a relationship with that person and know that they won’t mind it.
            I wait for Yggdra to nod off against the high back of a chair and force my attention back to making breakfast.

            It takes another half hour or so until Ein appears, and by then I’m almost ready to actually cook the pancakes.
            Rose and Ein are quite animated and I can hear Yggdra replying to them at times, and so I expect she’s actually more awake by now.
            …It is half past ten in the morning.
            Since we’re usually up much earlier, I would call this a lazy day, especially since breakfast won’t actually be finished until noon.

            I start wondering what we should do about Lancer and then he walks past the kitchen looking disoriented.
            He apologizes to his Master for sleeping late and says that it must be the unfamiliar location.
            …Does that mean he was kept up late because he couldn’t get comfortable, or that it was too comfortable and he slept longer than he intended…?
            I think to myself as the others tease him about it fruitlessly.

            …Finally, I’m able to put food on the table and the five of us, three magi and two Servants, eat a large and sumptuous breakfast full of calories and protein to help stabilize us after our hard fight yesterday.

            “—So.
            “I guess the worst part is over now.”
            Ein sighs and leans back.
            Everyone had seconds of everything and we completely exhausted the materials for all the food, so we’re simply reclining around the table and waiting for the amount of food we ate to start digesting.
            “If it comes down to a fight between us we’ll be able to fight fairly, so all we have to worry about is Berserker and Caster.”

            “—Eh?”

            …I must be making a strange face.
            I know that Yggdra is staring blankly as well.
            But that really can’t be helped as something absurd was just said.

            “But battles in the Holy Grail War are fought between seven Servants.
            “This time there is the irregularity of the Riders, with one class shared between two heroes, but that’s only bringing the total up to eight artificially.
            “Avenger was summoned instead of Caster, so…”

            Ein’s party is also staring at me with blank faces.

            “—No, we haven’t seen it yet, but Caster was definitely summoned.
            “We were deployed into this war by the supervisor, and he’s told us that including the two Riders there were definitely nine Servants in this war.
            “—Well, he didn’t actually tell us about the two Riders and Avenger, he just guaranteed that Caster had been summoned, because the Riders and Avenger were summoned through cheating, but it all amounts to the same thing.”

            So.
            So all this time, the battle of seven Servants was actually an escalated battle between nine.
            …That is fundamentally very strange.

            “—Now, I have been preparing for the Holy Grail War for a long time, since it was always foretold that someone from my family would receive the proof of Mastership.
            “And even summoning seven Servants into the prepared vessels is supposed to be as much as the Great Grail can handle.
            “—The anomaly of twinned Servants has been brought out purposefully twice as a form of cheating, but nine Servants at once is just too much.”
            I complain.

            “From what we understand, it’s because the Fourth and Fifth wars were very odd.
            “The ritual was incomplete in the fourth cycle and it was overtaken by outside factors in the fifth war, and so there was an excess of prana left behind.
            “Apparently the top brass of the Magic Association even investigated it.”
            Rose explains with a curious expression.
            “—Well, in the end there’s nothing we can do even after explaining it, but this is the explanation for the shortening cycles too.
            “Normally it takes forty years or so, but there was only a gap of ten years between the fourth and fifth wars and it hasn’t even been five years since the last war, after all.”

            …Hmm, well, I suppose all I can really do is accept it.
            But I had really thought that things would be as good as settled once we had defeated Berserker…

            “—At any rate, there’s no use worrying about it now.
            “There’s no way we can go out like this when Roswell and Saber are both exhausted.”
            Ein declares so with authority, and because it’s the case nobody disputes it.

            “I’ll take care of the dishes, so I guess we can just take it easy today.”

            The boy shrugs and says that, and so the rest of the day begins.
            …Leisure.
            This is a pattern that has repeated since I entered the Grail War.
            Fight, and then rest.
            Even with extra allies in the house, it’s only natural to fall back into that pattern.

            Anyhow, I let myself doze off lightly to conserve energy until Yggdra makes a light lunch mostly based around vegetables.
            Ein and Rose bicker to themselves in the distance, even though it sounds more like Ein is simply being picked on mercilessly.
            There’s affection behind Rose’s gestures, and it feels as though the two of them have worked together for a long time, so there’s no uneasiness in it.

            The day goes on.
            Lancer simply sits Japanese-style and watches as Ein and Rose talk, and Yggdra retreats upstairs.
            …I go to read some old classic literature to pass the time.
            No matter what, I should refrain from strenuous activity so that my energy can slowly regenerate.
            It feels good to have the house fill up with voices, and even when things get rowdy downstairs I don’t mind it.

            …Yggdra is most likely sleeping to conserve her power.
            When you put a cup under the faucet, you have to wait for it to fill up, and since we almost drained the cup with the battle last night it’s going to take time for the cup that’s the prana stored inside her body to fill up again.
            After today she should be capable of battle once again, so I am not worried.
            I should be coming up with some vague ideas to fight Caster, since I know that Berserker and Yggdra are on even footing.
            Instead, I muse on the figure of the girl I saw in my dreams and picture Yggdra sleeping.
            …I should try not to picture her sleeping.
            Because—the very idea of it is tempting, and I should know better than to do that.
            We aren’t in a relationship like that and so we can’t set limits for each other.
            ……Well, and there’s the matter of everyone downstairs.

            …The kind girl who has sheltered me these past days.
            The girl who has had fun playing around with different pastimes in this era.
            …Her younger self reflected in my dreams, in all her heartache and bravery—
            I honestly admire her.
            This goes beyond being charmed by her portrait as a child.
            My youthful admiration has been changed into something that is much more like “real” affection.
            …I’m not worthy of a person like that, I know.
            But we are “bound” together, and she has not rejected me yet, so I must still have some worth in her eyes.
            Even if that’s just giving me false hope—
            I remember her body.
            I remember the act of having sex with her and try to suppress arousal.
            …I desire her.
            I trust her and believe in her, and knowing her as I do in my waking hours and in my dreams, I know what I feel for her.
            —The Grail War is almost over.
            We will inevitably be separated soon.

            We will win, and she will claim her wish, and she will disappear—

            …At that moment.
            My mind snags on something I had not thought about until now.

            “—”
            It’s such a simple thing, but I can’t believe that I hadn’t considered it.
            Well, I suppose we’ll simply have to discuss such a thing eventually—

            Vaguely,
            I make my plans as the day goes on.

            …And at last, we arrive at dinnertime.

            Ein is in charge of the kitchen, and he makes a dinner mostly based around meat and potatoes.
            There isn’t quite the volume of the breakfast I made, but it is still a hearty meal even if it is plain, and means to restore energy to us.
            We relax after the meal, around the table.
            —And.
            That means it’s time to launch my attack.

            “—Now, I’m just curious.
            “But now that we’re allies, I was wondering what each of us would do with the Holy Grail if we won it.
            “We never have talked about that before.”

            Four faces turn towards me, two bemused, one curious, and one blank.
            “Personally, I never had a wish for the Holy Grail.
            “For the most part, I’m competing for my family’s honor, and there’s nothing specifically that I would want to wish for.
            “If I win, it would be for winning’s sake itself, and I would want to let Saber use the Grail for her wish.”

            “—Well, it’s pretty much the same for me.”
            Ein says so, nonplussed.
            “Hector-sama ordered us to fight and we can’t back down now that we’ve been chosen.
            “I don’t have any wishes and I’d just let Lancer have the Grail.”

            “I don’t think I have a right to the Grail since I’m not a participant, but I don’t need it.
            “…I’m not like you two, I actually have wishes.
            “But it’d be more meaningful to accomplish them myself since I can do that. I don’t need the help of some defective magical artifact for that.”

            …As if naturally, everyone turns to Lancer, who simply shakes his head.
            “…I do not have a conscious wish.
            “However, the act of the summoning itself does not fulfill me, and so there must be something.
            “—I believe I will know when the time comes.”

            …That’s an interesting answer to make.
            But all the same, it doesn’t seem too unusual for someone so quiet and repressed as Lancer to not know the reality of his own wish.

            And.
            Everyone turns to Yggdra, who is making a smile as if she’s troubled.
            “—I do, have a wish.”
            She says so with a faraway gaze.
            “But I’m sure that at least some people here would find it foolish, so I won’t say.”

            The day ends like that.
            We sit around talking about possible plans of attack and searching to locate Berserker and the elusive Caster, everyone fully aware that this may come down to a battle between us if both of our Servants survive that long.
            …Everyone prefers a fair fight to other means of combat, and so we are prepared.
            I get out some frozen fruit for dessert and then Ein, Rose, and Lancer retreat upstairs when I tell them that I will take care of washing up.
            …Yggdra and I are left alone in the quiet house.

            “—About earlier.”
            I don’t really know how to begin, but I do feel that I should talk about it.
            …Our chances are running out, and whatever my flaws I don’t believe we should leave this unaddressed.
            “I mean, about your wish…
            “If it’s something that you’re fighting for, that you believe is worth being in this war for after everything… then I wouldn’t find it foolish.”
            I try to say to her that it’s all right to tell me.

            …Yggdra gives me a look like she’s thinking hard, and then smiles bitterly.
            “—It is foolish.
            “Even I can recognize that what I’m asking for may even be more than the Holy Grail can fulfill.
            “It’s a small… and very foolish wish.”

            “Even so, Yggdra.”
            …A small wish that even the Holy Grail cannot grant.
            I wonder.
            What did the girl who ran through the battlefield to the very end wish for—?

            “—It’s because I am a Heroic Spirit that I know.
            “…Of course I had regrets when I died, but it was becoming a Heroic Spirit and knowing my experiences as a cleaner that made me realize.
            “Everything I worked for was useless.”
            She smiles and says so as if it’s a matter of course.
            “If I were a better sovereign, then it would have all ended with that war.
            “…The things that I learned were lessons that I hoped would be passed on down the generations, but even just looking at the world today I know I that those hopes were empty.
            “—If I can, I want to fix that.”

            My heart stumbles as she speaks those words.
            “By—fixing that, do you mean—”

            Yggdra shakes her head slowly.
            “I don’t mean that I want to go back and redo my life or anything like that.
            “—No, that may also be a thing that the Holy Grail cannot grant, and it would be foolish to take back what has already happened.
            “I just want to wish for the Holy Grail to change the world from this war onward.
            “—I want there to be peace.”

            …And she gives me an answer befitting the girl who stood at the end of that bloodstained road and reflected upon how she had arrived there.
            How could I…, have thought she would want anything else?

            All the same, I know that she is right.
            Human nature itself is against her, and even if it is very powerful I don’t know how much influence the Holy Grail would have over the entire world.
            Going beyond true “magic”, what Yggdra asks for is closer to a “miracle”.

            “Roswell?”
            …I notice when I look that Yggdra is staring at me with concern.
            “—Is something wrong?”

            …I force myself to stand.
            Even so.
            …Even if this is… what she has decided to wish for…
            I can’t put the lid back on my feelings.

            “…Yggdra.
            “—There’s something I should tell you.”

            Her eyes follow me intently.
            Her expression is blank, but I think she knows what I’m trying to say.

            “I—
            “I care about you very much. I…”

            …And yet.
            As I try to speak the words, Yggdra comes closer to me and touches my face softly as if to silence me.
            And when I hesitate,

            “—”

            …she kisses me.

            “—, —”

            It is not a gentle kiss.
            Firmly, she parts my lips with her tongue and presses her body against mine.
           …Her warmth…, makes me remember yesterday, and I can feel my heartbeat speeding up as my arousal grows.
            She is telling me.
            She is saying that we mustn’t speak of such things.
            …I know that as well as she does, but still, I love her.
            I love her so much there’s no help for me.

            “—Roswell.”
            She says my name quietly.
            “Roswell.”
            She speaks so close to me that her lips brush against my own when they move.
            “I want you to touch me, I want to feel you.”
            Already my arms are around her, but when I try to let go so that we can go upstairs to the bedroom she shakes her head stubbornly.

            “It has to be here, it has to be right now.
            “Beyond needing prana for tomorrow, I just want you inside me as fast as possible—”
            She begs for sex in a husky voice, and there is a fever in my body that knows no reason.

            Step by step.
            She pulls me along with her as she walks backwards and collides with the wall.
            “—”
            Many of the lights are off, and it’s just the kitchen lights illuminating her body from one side.
            …With the blinds all closed, it really feels as though we are alone in the house.
            Or even alone in the world.

            I run my hands carefully through her soft hair.
            She has determined that for now we must put reality aside, and I cannot possibly refuse her.
            Her body is heated through her clothes, and I can feel that her nipples are standing up.
            …I pull back from the kiss to drag her shirt up over her head, and she holds her arms up so as not to fight me.
            She is wearing a black bra with faint patterns across the fabric like antique chinaware.
            Her shirt drops to the floor as she unfastens the buttons of my own shirt and pushes it off my shoulders.
            Her fingers start drifting down to where my erection strains against the fabric of my pants, and I try to hold my breath as she touches at me.
            Her skirt—is next, and once the fastener at the waistline is undone it rolls down her hips like rain.
            “—”
            I catch my breath.
            The sight awaiting me is a pair of bikini-cut panties that are worn overtop a garter belt.
            They are black and match with her bra, and the soft swell of her erect clitoris stands out against the fabric.
            …I run a finger over it and then stroke up and down the cleft of her covered pussy, and she moans wholeheartedly, not even trying to keep her voice down.
            She pushes her hips up against my hand insistently, spreading her legs.
            The fabric along the cleft is damp.

            “—”
            Yggdra’s nimble fingers are already undoing the front of my pants.
            …I let her, as I don’t think I could withstand the strain for much longer.

            She smiles with an absent, wicked look on her face as she takes my penis into her hand.
            “This has already been inside me once.”
            Her voice has a dreamy quality as if she’s not aware she’s saying so out loud.
            She traces the length of me with her white fingertips.

            “Mm.”
            I try to keep my voice down.
            …If we’re loud, it will carry upstairs.
            Being overheard…, would be pretty embarrassing—
            But Yggdra strokes me, reaches to push my pants further down so she can touch at my balls, and then rubs her fingertips across the head.
            …I feel feverish.
            She giggles and lifts her hand away.

            “Roswell—”
            She calls out in a singsong way and thrusts her hips up again.
            “Roswell, touch me more—”

            “—”
            Carefully.
            I slide her panties down so that they won’t get caught on the fastenings of her garters.
            And as they fall, I kneel down as well.
            —I am staring directly at her.
            The last time I was too confused and aroused to really look at her, but I can see now that the folds of her pussy are delicate and neat.
            In the light from the kitchen, they glisten with her wetness.
            …I, lean forward and kiss her directly.

            “Roswell—”
            She calls my name as though sighing.
            I hold on to her hips and taste her.
            …She smells faintly of sweat and her fluids are sweet.
            “Ya—ah.”
            I run my tongue along her entrance, and she moans.
            I feel Yggdra’s hand come to rest at the back of my head.

            Her body arches against the wall, and I explore her sex with my lips.
            When I use my tongue on or around her clitoris, she cries out sweetly.
            When I kiss the faintly twitching mouth of her vagina, she moans and shakes.
            …I feel dizzy and drunk.
            I swallow her fluids as she gets wetter, and her fingers clutch into my hair.

            The sound of her voice is seductive, and she is not ashamed of raising it in pleasure.
            I can feel the muscles on the insides of her thighs trembling as her moans get higher.

            “Roswell—ah, ah—”
            She twists her hips as though her body is not sure whether it wants to escape or welcome my tongue, even as she holds me firmly in place.
            Her cries are becoming more urgent.
            …She keeps getting wetter, and I can feel her twitching lightly against my lips.
            When I slip my tongue inside her, the folds of her inner walls are contracting slightly.
            She must…, be close.
            “Ah—ah, hah—”

            Yggdra wriggles under my hands even as I hold her hips still.
            She must want to thrust.
            I suck on her clitoris.
            …I can feel the blood beating against my tongue.
            As I push the hood down with my lips—

            “Ah—ah, ahh—!!”

            —she comes with her body in an arch and her head thrown back.

            When I sit up, she’s gazing down at me hazily.
            Yggdra pants shamelessly with the tip of her tongue visible against her swollen lower lip.
            —The insides of her thighs are wet.
            Some of the dampness is sweat, but a little bit of her pussyjuice has started to run down her thighs.
            …I wonder if it’s right to call her perverted when she’s completely unashamed of her desire.
            Even the movements of her body when she simply pants are exquisite and sensual.

            …She steps around me.
            Facing away from me, she braces herself with her forearms against the table, and spreads her legs apart.
            Yggdra looks over her shoulder at me.
            The lips of her vagina are open wide, and her unfocused gaze is plainly begging.
            Her breasts are pendulous, as if to emphasize that her bra and garters are all that she’s wearing.
            The black, satiny fabric suits her pale skin so well.

            “Roswell…”
            She shakes her hips slightly as if presenting herself to me.
            …I stand, naked.
            Even though I vaguely recognize this room as the same place central to our everyday lives, the low lighting and Yggdra’s exposed body make it feel like a closed-off world.
            This is a place where ordinary common sense…, doesn’t have to apply.
            If I think about the reality that she’s asking me to fuck her from behind against the table where we eat, I won’t be able to function.
            My erection…, aches for her.
            She wants me.
            So… I guide the head of myself to line up with her, then shift my grip to her hips and thrust into her as deeply as I can in one swift stroke.

            “Ahh.”
            I feel Yggdra shudder around me.
            She’s—so wet.
            I’m going to lose my mind.

            I lean forward and reach around to cover her lower belly with my right hand.
            Pressing myself to her back, I rock my hips shallowly and roll my fingertips over her clitoris, which is still wet with my own saliva.
            —She lets out a hot moan and wiggles her rear up and down.
            The firm…, and voluptuous curves of her ass press against me and excite me.
            Her folds are pulsing quickly as if in eagerness.
            “Roswell…”
            Yggdra rocks as if delirious.
            I can’t take her deeply in this position, but her body grips me tightly and her moans are very wild, as if she cannot hold herself back.
            I could swear that her breath is steaming white in the air.
            “Ahh, ahn—ah—”
            She squirms beneath me.
            I rub the very tip of her clit with the pad of my index finger, and she shudders.
            Her vagina clamps down on me once, so tightly my vision whites out, and then relaxes.

            “Hah—ah, ha—ah.”
            She hangs supported against the table with cloudy eyes.
            She is so wet that I can hear slick, obscene sounds between us whenever I move.
            —It appears…, that she came lightly.

            “More—”
            Yggdra rolls her hips so that my penis presses against the front and then the back of her vagina, and the texture of her walls makes me moan.
            “Roswell, more—”

            I straighten up.
            She is turned just a bit as if to look up at me.
            The white slope of her back—, is so beautiful.
            I want to kiss and touch every part of her.
            The cheeks of her ass are parted in this position, and I can even see the parts of her body that she cannot see.
            The rim of her vulva is deep pink and shining.
            I want…, to devour her and love and worship her inch by inch.
            But.
            The pressure building up inside me is unbearable.

            So I hold onto her tightly and thrust as hard as I dare.
            Immediately her voice rises in cries of pleasure.
            Distantly I think that we’ll be overheard, but I don’t remember why that might matter anymore.
            Pumping into her so that our mixed-up fluids slosh and her body shakes.
            Yggdra thrusts her ass up against me hungrily.

            “Ros—, well—”

            Her long golden hair sways.
            Her eyes are hazy pits of a blue deep enough to drown in.
            Her cheeks are flushed and her tongue is hanging out.
            In this disheveled state…, she is again so beautiful that I cannot breathe.
            The walls and folds of her squeeze against me rhythmically, and the head of my arousal continues to press against a rough section of her body.
            Yggdra cries out “there, there” and squirms in ecstasy.

            “Ah—ah, Roswell—I’m—”

            I want to call out and encourage her to come, but I cannot make my voice work—

            “Fuck me—harder—”
            “—”

            She calls out in a high-pitched voice when she comes.
            She squeezes down on me so heavily that I cannot think, and I ejaculate into her without hesitation, thrusting into her until my vision goes white—

            …And.
            When we part.
            She remains hunched over the table, covered in sweat, with thin ribbons of semen slowly dripping down her vulva and beading at the head of her clitoris, pattering faintly against the floor.

            “—”
            She stands there with a look of dazed contentment on her face.
            And I—

            “……”
            I…,
            I love and desire her so much that my heart just aches with the strength of my own emotions.
            Even if this won’t last, I still—

            For as long… as this war lasts.
            I will fight alongside her.
            For my honor and for her wish as well, but mostly—
            It’s simply because I love her.
            …Even if…, she is reluctant to let me admit that.
            My feelings will not change—