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Sherlock’s back was bowed, arse in the air as he clenched handfuls of the sheets to either side of his head. John’s hands slid up his sides and around to his chest until his torso was flush against Sherlock’s back. He chuckled at the height difference as he came face to face with Sherlock’s shoulder blades, but the change in position did allow his hard cock to gently rub against Sherlock’s perineum, and wasn’t that just lovely.

“Oh.” Sherlock breathed in quiet surprise, as John slowly unwound and slid back again, his hands grabbing two perfect handfuls and spreading that plush arse for the first time. He stared for a moment, and the sight of that little furled pink bud of skin sent a jolt through his stomach and straight to his bollocks. John leaned forward and trailed a few chaste kisses down that luscious backside before flattening his tongue and sliding it up and down the exposed cleft.

“Oh fuck.” Sherlock panted again, arching his back, pressing his face forwards and opening himself even more to John’s attentions. John read Sherlock’s body language and took to his new task with vigor, lapping and licking against the twitching hole before him. Sherlock’s moans got louder and as his hole began to relax and unfurl, John licked inside him, and both their legs began to tremble from want. John’s hands continued rubbing Sherlock’s arse as he swirled his tongue inside again and again. Desperate to feel more, John moved a thumb over and gently worked his spit into Sherlock’s skin until the muscle relaxed and he could thrust it in and out, fascinated by the sight of Sherlock consuming a part of him.

“Please John. More. Please.” Sherlock gasped out, his voice sounding dazed and broken as he pushed back onto John’s thumb.

John sat up for a moment, leaving one hand on his lover’s arse while the other fumbled in the bedside drawer, his hand closing around a bottle he hoped was lubricant, while his eyes stayed glued on the trembling, beautiful creature in front of him. Sherlock tensed for a moment, set adrift by the loss of contact, as John’s hand temporarily left him, but relaxed again when he heard the cap pop open as John slicked his fingers.

“Here.” John said, not sure exactly what he meant. Here is where I’ll take you, make you mine. Here is where I belong, at the very center of you. Here, right here, in this moment, I have never wanted anyone more than this. “Right here.” He said again as his index finger slid up and down over Sherlock’s entrance once, twice, before slowly pressing in.

John worked slowly, torturing Sherlock with anticipation, savoring this moment, and but unwilling to rush for fear of hurting him. After what felt like an age, John added another finger and began twisting a little each time he pulled them back. The softness he felt was fascinating as the pads of his fingers explored and stretched his lover. He was so lost in the sensation that he accidentally brushed against the little nub of Sherlock’s prostate, making the man below him jump with surprise and moan in a baritone that should be illegal as he settled again. The sound brought John back into the moment, his cock positively aching to enter, to claim, to own.

Now, John. Now now now please.” Sherlock begged. John didn’t relent, though, wanting to be sure he did this right, he added another finger, twisting and scissoring until Sherlock was stretched and ready. The sight of his three fingers disappearing into Sherlock’s body for the first time pushed him close to the edge and John quickly removed his fingers, wiping them on the sheets before grabbing the bottle and slicking up his erection.

He lined himself up and stroked the glans over Sherlock’s hole, hearing a muffled “Oh fuck.” from the man presenting himself before him. The words made him look up for a moment, scanning down the pale long lines of his Sherlock’s back, his shoulders, the elegant arms braced around the head of wild dark curls, a beautiful tableau that gave him pause. “Wait.”

“NO!” Sherlock gasped, panicking. “No, you can’t stop now, don’t-“ John cut him off by grabbing a shoulder and pulling, flipping Sherlock onto his back even as he surged over him, wrapping himself over Sherlock’s body and kissing him deeply. “I need to see you.”

John brushed light kisses along Sherlock’s lips, cheeks, brow, dispelling the fear of moments ago. He leaned back and looked down at Sherlock, his eyes closed and his expression one of bliss.

John took hold of himself and lined up again, pausing to look once more at Sherlock’s face.

“Sherlock.” he softly said, and those beautiful eyes opened as Sherlock reached out to touch John’s face.

“Right here.” John said, and started to push forward. They were both silent for a few minutes, as they adjusted, eyes locked together, while John moved farther inside, pulling back a little, only to slowly push farther until he was fully sheathed inside Sherlock’s body. John stilled for a moment, dropping kisses along Sherlock’ neck, collarbone, and chest. Sherlock’s hands stroked up and down John’s sides, firmer and bolder until they slid down and cupped John’s arse, pulling them harder against each other and grinding John’s cock even farther into him.

“Do you feel this, Sherlock?” John grunted out as he began thrusting in. “Right here? Do you feel me taking you?” He asked as he trailed his hand along the stretched muscle and started pumping his hips hard, and causing Sherlock to throw his head back arch his neck as John filled him over and over.

“Right here. You’re mine. You’re mine forever. Mine.” John pumped furiously, digging his fingers into Sherlock’s hips and pulling them up onto John’s thighs as Sherlock’s heels climbed up his back for a better angle. Sherlock whimpered as John raked his nails up Sherlock’s chest, pushing his thumbs hard against nipples. He gave a few more brutal thrusts of his hips, hitting Sherlock’s prostate and making him whimper again, before grasping Sherlock’s shoulders and pulling him up to his lap.

“Right here.” John whispered fiercely, and pushed their foreheads together as Sherlock put his arms around John’s shoulders for leverage and rolled his hips. Right here is all I will ever want. Right here is everything.

They kissed, sloppy and open-mouthed, along each other’s necks, and faces, panting as Sherlock ground himself down onto each of John’s thrusts. John pressed a sweat slick palm into the tight space between them and began stroking Sherlock’s cock.

“Here.” John said and ran his thumb over the slit as Sherlock curled around him and gave a loud desperate moan. “Right here.” John said as he pulled the foreskin up over the glans and down again, his other hand on Sherlock’s hip guiding him. “Right here.” John said and pushed up harder as his hand sped up on Sherlock’s cock. Sherlock pulled his face out of John’s neck and brought their lips together.

“I’m yours.” He said into John’s mouth as his body began to shake. “I’m yours, John. John. Oh god, John.” Sherlock went rigid, clenching John tightly as his orgasm spasmed through him, spilling over their chests and stomachs. John fucked him through it with gentle strokes, and Sherlock’s moans turned to little sighs of ‘oh oh’ as the last few spurts dripped over John’s hand. Sherlock seemed to melt over him and John held him tightly as he pushed in once more and came deep inside him.

As the adrenaline wore off, John became aware that his muscles felt like rubber, and his leg ached from being bent under Sherlock for so long, but they sat there, pressed together as closely as two people could be, their breaths coming hard and matched.

As John’s brain began to come back online, he panicked as he thought of the post-case high that lead them to this moment. The desperation that lead to bad decisions and possible mistakes that couldn’t be undone. He couldn’t do it. He began to get up and Sherlock made a sound of confusion as he opened his eyes.

“I can’t go back.” John said, his voice sounding smaller and more afraid than Sherlock had ever heard it. “To the way things were. Friends. I can’t pretend I don’t feel-“

“John” Sherlock said softly. He laid down, pulling John in tightly next to him.

He took John’s hand in his, laid them over his own chest, and closed his eyes.

“Stay. Right here.”