When the officer who’d booked Adrian in the middle of the night finally came back to retrieve him five hours later, Adrian was expecting to find Natalie waiting for him at the front desk. He was more than a little surprised to find Milo standing there instead, tensely wringing a zip-up hoodie between his fists. The officer escorted Adrian over to the nearest counter, passing him a clipboard in need of his signature, before handing over a plastic bag with Adrian’s personal effects.
“I can leave?” Adrian asked hoarsely. He’d spent a good portion of the night yelling and exhaustively explaining what a mistake the whole thing had been. The strain magnified his hangover, mangling his voice.
“You’ve made bail, Mr. Pasdar,” the officer informed him just a bit louder than necessary, causing Adrian to wince, “We’ll be in contact about a court date.”
Adrian nodded with as little movement as possible. He slowly made his way across the room towards Milo.
“Thanks, M—” his whisper of gratitude was cut off by Milo about-facing and briskly exiting the police station. Shoulders slumped, Adrian pulled his sunglasses out of the zip lock bag, placed them on his face, and followed.
The drive home was silent, if for no other reason than Milo was refusing to even look at Adrian, and Adrian’s head was throbbing from the early morning sunlight, in spite of his sunglasses. When they finally reached Adrian’s house, he was sure Milo would let him out in the street before speeding away, however, Milo surprised him and pulled into the driveway, punching in the key code to open the gate, then pulled up to Adrian’s garage. He wordlessly cut the car engine and climbed out of the driver’s seat, once again leaving Adrian in his wake. Adrian sighed, watching Milo disappear through the front door before letting himself out of the car and heading inside.
Adrian entered the house, and for a moment he thought he was alone. Milo, Nat, the kids- they were nowhere in sight. He placed his glasses and zip lock on the table by the door, before slowly making his way toward the kitchen. Milo was busy behind the island counter, filling a glass with water. Adrian sat on one of the stools opposite Milo and watched his friend for another moment.
“Where’s Nat?” he croaked out, wincing as his head throbbed even more pronouncedly.
Milo turned toward him once again, still not looking Adrian in the eyes, and slammed a full glass of water onto the counter top, dropping two ibuprofen tablets beside it. The glass clinking against the marble made Adrian cringe.
“Fuck, Milo,” he barked at the once again retreating man.
Adrian let out a frustrated sigh/groan before swallowing the painkillers and downing the glass of water. He stood at the counter for a moment before going after Milo. He stopped in the entryway of the living room, staring at Milo who was standing in the middle of the room, staring off at the wall behind the couch.
“Mi, where is Nat?” he repeated. His throat, now hydrated, didn’t distort his voice nearly as much. He actually sounded almost authoritative. Adrian had used his one phone call to call Natalie at their house in Austin, expecting her to drop everything and come get him. He’d never expected her to send Milo in her stead.
Milo waited a second longer before finally answering Adrian’s question, “She’s at the Austin house with the kids. Where she’s been since the kids went back to school after New Years.”
Adrian clenched his jaw. He already knew all that, and Milo knew he knew. Adrian hated when Milo played these stupid games. “I mean, when’s she due to arrive here?”
Milo laughed bitterly, looking around the room in sweeping, searching glances, never looking straight at Adrian. “The kids have school. She’s staying in Texas. She’ll see you when you head out there next.”
Adrian narrowed his eyes and practically growled his next question. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
Milo tensed and finally locked his gaze upon Adrian. It took all Adrian’s effort not to flinch at the rage burning in Milo’s eyes.
“She isn’t fucking coming, Adrian. She called me to come and get your sorry ass and bring you home before the paps swarmed the jail,” Milo spat, “If I didn’t care so fucking much about those kids of yours, I’d have left you there, but it’s bad enough they’re going to see their father’s face all over the internet with the letters ‘DUI’ fucking blazing like a neon sign next to it.”
Adrian ground his teeth, fighting down the knot of shame threatening to lodge itself in his throat, and took a step closer to Milo. “Save your guilt-trip, Milo. I don’t want to hear it. As if you’re a fucking saint?!”
Milo shifted on his feet, stalking forward like a tiger ready to pounce, “I never thought, not in a million fucking years, that you could ever be this stupid. You’ve had your asshole moments, Adrian, but this takes the fucking cake.”
Adrian bristled, getting in Milo’s face, “Shut up!”
“No,” Milo growled ominously as they danced around one another, “You don’t get to fucking brood and not talk about this. You fucked up. You FUCKED UP!”
“JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP,” Adrian screamed despite his throbbing head. He could hardly register the pain as he lunged forward; his adrenaline was pumping so fiercely. Adrian grabbed Milo’s arm and shirt. Adrian had a slight height advantage, but Milo had youth and training on his side. Adrian found himself pinned against the wall after only a minute of struggling.
“YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP, ADRIAN,” Milo shrieked against Adrian’s jaw, shaking Adrian roughly against the wall, “WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING? DRIVING FUCKING DRUNK! YOU’RE A FUCKING ROLE MODEL! YOU COULD HAVE KILLED SOMEONE!”
“YOU THINK I DON’T FUCKING KNOW THAT?” Adrian yelled in return. “I FUCKING LET MY ENTIRE FAMILY DOWN, MY FANS, MYSELF. YOU THINK I DON’T FUCKING KNOW THAT?”
“FUCK,” Milo barked, shaking Adrian one last time before releasing him and backing up. He ran his hand through his hair before turning back to Adrian, who remained leaning against the wall.
“What were you thinking, man?” His question was filled with exasperation.
Adrian took a shaky breath before running his hand through his own hair, almost exactly like Milo had just done. “I wasn’t,” he admitted, voice once again hoarse, “I fucking wasn’t thinking.”
Milo took a shaky breath himself before growling anew and tossing his arms into the air, “Why the fuck not, Adrian? Why the fuck weren’t you thinking? You have a wife, you have two beautiful kids, you’re successful. You’ve fucking earned some serious fucking respect. Why did you decide to forget all that?”
Adrian stared at the floor beside Milo’s feet.
“ADRIAN!” Milo’s booming voice caused Adrian to look up. “You have friends who miss you…” Adrian watched Milo’s face twist with grief before the younger man continued, “Friends who miss you… every fucking minute of every fucking day we’re apart…” Milo’s voice slowly trailed off in volume, dropping his chin to his chest as his face crumpled.
“Mi…” Adrian pleaded softly.
Milo continued to watch the carpet, “I’m so fucking disappointed in you… so disappointed.” He looked up abruptly, locking his watery eyes with Adrian’s. “But, more than anything, I was scared fucking shitless. You could’ve died…” His voice broke on the last word.
“You fucking could have!” Milo barked, before continuing more quietly, “You fucking could have and you don’t seem to care. You didn’t care when you went out to get fucking polluted alone, so you could play Russian Roulette in your fucking truck on Interstate 405 at 3-fucking-AM.”
Adrian clenched and unclenched his hands into fists against his thighs. He was itching to touch Milo again. Silence descended over the pair for a few minutes while they shifted, uncomfortably, on their feet.
“I didn’t think it would be like this,” Adrian finally offered as way of explanation.
“What?” He could feel Milo’s eyes on him once again.
Adrian looked up to meet Milo’s gaze before continuing, pained, “I didn’t think it would be like this. It hurts every day. The first day was awkward as hell, but I kept telling myself it was the first day. After a week, I convinced myself it was getting easier. After the second, I couldn’t lie to myself anymore. I was sleeping until noon most days. Going to bed around 9PM.”
Milo moved closer. “Why didn’t you call?”
Adrian laughed sadly, “You were in New York. What was I supposed to do? Call and cry to you over the phone like a teenage girl?”
Milo’s forehead creased, pained, “If you had to.”
“No fucking way,” Adrian breathed. “I decided to try and handle it myself.”
They were silent a moment.
“Why not just drink here?”
Adrian stared at Milo, as if the younger man had grown a second head, “I hadn’t bought any booze since the New Years Eve party. The house was empty.”
Milo was standing almost flush against Adrian again, gripping his shoulders, “You should’ve taken a cab.”
Adrian suddenly felt a little wild as he admitted, “I didn’t want to.”
Adrian reached for Milo, gripping Milo’s hip tightly with one hand, while shoving his other hand into Milo’s hair. He pulled Milo forward, crashing their mouths together. Milo snaked his arms around Adrian’s back in return, clawing at Adrian’s shoulder blades. The kiss was frantic, fevered. They hadn’t touched or tasted one another since Adrian’s last day on set. Milo moaned as Adrian plundered his mouth with his tongue. Adrian ground his hips up against Milo’s, pleased to feel Milo’s cock already half hard beneath his jeans.
Milo pushed forward, changing the angle of the kiss, dropping his hands down Adrian’s back, around to the front hem of Adrian’s shirt. Adrian gasped as Milo’s hands pushed under the tight t-shirt Adrian had worn the night before, grazing open-palmed and cool across Adrian’s hot skin.
“Mi,” Adrian gasped as Milo trailed bites and licks across Adrian’s jaw and down his neck. Adrian grabbed the hem of his own shirt, pulling it over his head and off, while Milo leaned in, sucking on Adrian’s nipple.
“Oh, fuck, Mi,” he moaned, shoving a hand into Milo’s hair again. Milo reached over, pinching Adrian’s other nipple between thumb and forefinger, before taking a step backward, putting a foot between them.
“No,” Adrian pleaded.
“Shut up,” Milo breathed, pulling his shirt over his head and tossing it on top of Adrian’s on the couch. They stared at one another, slightly distorted mirror images, shirtless, in jeans and sneakers.
Wordlessly, Milo toed off his shoes before escaping down the hallway. Adrian abandoned his own shoes and followed. He was beginning to wonder just when he’d started following after Milo like a well-trained puppy. He was pretty sure, thinking back, that he’d always followed Milo like that.
Milo was kicking his jeans across the floor when Adrian reached the room. Milo’s boxer-briefs followed quickly and he was standing naked, all before Adrian had even pulled off his socks. Adrian sped up, losing all measure of grace as he stumbled out of his clothing, trying to catch up to Milo, like always. When Adrian was finally naked, he looked up to find Milo rifling through the bedside table. Milo pulled out a condom and bottle of lube, and placed them on top of the table, then turned back to Adrian.
“Come here,” Milo instructed.
Adrian’s cock twitched as he approached Milo. Milo pulled him forward, capturing Adrian’s mouth in a searing kiss once again, pushing their naked chests flush together. Milo ground his hips slowly against Adrian’s, rubbing their leaking cocks maddeningly, breaking their kiss in favor of breathing shallow puffs of air against each others’ parted lips.
“Fuck,” Adrian gasped, staring into Milo’s hooded eyes with his own. “Mi.”
Milo breathed in response, gripping Adrian’s face between his palms, “I need… I’m gonna fuck you.”
He allowed Milo to push him backwards onto the bed. Milo ripped open the condom, sheathing his cock with it, then grabbed the lube and climbed onto the bed between Adrian’s spread legs. Milo squeezed some lube onto his fingers before sliding his hand behind Adrian’s balls, watching as Adrian’s cock jumped at the soft touch. Milo immediately inserted a single finger into Adrian, causing Adrian to clench down. He groaned at the sensation of being penetrated. Adrian didn’t usually bottom, not even for Milo, but that didn’t stop Milo from moving his finger as Adrian painfully gripped at the sheets. Adrian choked out a gasp for more quickly, and Milo, added a second finger. Adrian arched his back at the sensation of Milo curling his fingers, stretching his tight muscles. He hissed, the burning stretch mixing with the shocks of pleasure the pads of Milo’s fingers were stoking.
“Fuck,” Adrian gasped again. “Milo, please. Fuck me.”
Adrian bit his tongue to prevent a whimper as Milo’s fingers left his body. He watched with hooded eyes as Milo leaned back on his haunches, slicking his cock with more lube, before lining the head up with Adrian’s hole. Milo pulled Adrian’s legs up onto his shoulder’s before thrusting forward. Milo entered Adrian quickly, gasping unintelligible obscenities at the tight heat. Adrian groaned, growing steadily louder, as Milo entered him. He felt stretched taut, too tight, and he gasped for air as Milo pulled back slightly before pushing in again, further this time. When they were face to face, Milo balls deep, Adrian practically folded in half, Milo leaned down and captured Adrian’s mouth in a hard and sloppy kiss. Adrian growled into Milo’s mouth, clawing at Milo’s arms, before arching his own back and hissing, “Move.”
Milo, eyes flashing, complied without further instruction.
“God, Milo, fuck.”
Milo’s only response was a soft grunt as he sped up his thrusting. Adrian’s breathing grew easier, more regular, with each thrust. It wasn’t long before Adrian was pushing back against Milo, fucking himself on Milo’s cock with each inward trust.
“Touch me, ” Adrian pleaded.
Milo’s short, gnawed on nails dug jagged crescents into Adrian’s hip and thigh, as he changed the angle of his thrusts slightly so he was stroking Adrian’s prostate.
Adrian growled, frustrated: he could feel the pleasure building and coiling in his abdomen, but he wouldn’t come until his cock was touched and Milo knew it. Adrian let one of his hands fall from gripping Milo’s arm, so he could reach between the two of them and stroke himself. Before he could reach around his aching shaft and provide himself with a bit of relief, Milo turned his head and bit down on Adrian thigh.
“Fuck, Milo!” Adrian screamed.
Their gazes locked and Adrian recognized the same coldness from earlier in the kitchen. Milo thrust harder before growling, “Don’t touch.”
Adrian could feel himself flush at Milo’s chiding. He panted and writhed, thrusting back against Milo more sporadically. Adrian could tell from the look in Milo’s eyes and the tone of his voice: Adrian wasn’t allowed to come until Milo was finished.
“Fuck, please,” Adrian gasped. He was so close, and from the way Milo’s hips were abandoning their steady rhythm, he knew Milo was as well.
“Come on, Mi,” Adrian panted, digging his own nails into the flesh on Milo’s arms again, “Come.”
Milo instantly threw back his head, eyes screwing shut, screaming Adrian’s name as he came, thrusting arrhythmically into Adrian. Adrian continued moving against Milo, twisting beneath him.
“Please, please,” Adrian begged.
Milo pulled his softening cock out of Adrian slowly before mercifully gripping Adrian’s erection and pumped it twice hard. The knot of building tension in Adrian’s abdomen exploded in surges of pleasure, pulsing throughout his entire body His eyes squeezed shut as he came in long, thick strips across his own stomach and Milo’s hand, silently chanting “Mi, Mi, Mi”.
As soon as he could breath steadily once again, Adrian opened his eyes to find Milo approaching with a damp washcloth. Adrian hadn’t even felt Milo leave the bed. He let his eyes flutter shut once again while Milo gently cleaned him up before climbing back into bed beside him. Adrian turned his head to look at Milo. They lay on their backs, shoulders touching, and stared at one another for a few seconds, before Milo leaned over and kissed Adrian softly. When he pulled away, Milo turned onto his side, facing away from Adrian, while pushing his back against Adrian’s arm. Adrian huffed a soft laugh before turning onto his side, spooning against Milo’s back. Milo grabbed onto Adrian’s arm, hugging it to his chest, while nuzzling backward against Adrian’s chest. Adrian nuzzled right back, burying his face into Milo’s hair.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered.
“Good,” Milo replied, causing a small smile to break out across Adrian’s lips. The first genuine one in weeks.
“I mean it,” Adrian clarified.
Milo squeezed Adrian’s hand and sighed, “I know. You can apologize more this afternoon after we sleep a little and order some dinner.”
Adrian laughed against Milo’s shoulder before biting him.
“Natalie’s not going to be so forgiving,” Milo yawned.
Adrian sobered, “I know.”
“I’m on your side,” Milo sighed as he dropped off to sleep, “Even when I’m not.”
Once Milo was asleep, Adrian pressed his forehead to the back of Milo’s head and took a deep breath, stroking his thumb across Milo’s hand still clutching his arm. The worst was yet to come.