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Drunken Shenanigans

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It started off as a joke. An offhand comment that his best friend had made while they were drunk. They also got it done when they were drunk, absolutely shit-faced drunk, the type of drunk where’d it be a miracle if they were able to move for the rest of the week. Even though the hangover was a bitch the idea persisted, slowly making its way into their heads. So it is no surprise that they got it done while being drunk. And to make matters worse it was done by an ex-Yakuza member who was trying to make an honest living, well as honest of a living an ex gang member could make in this judgmental society, in a dimly lit basement. A joke is all that it was supposed to be, but clearly it was not.


The buzzing on his skin was calming. The pricks he felt didn’t hurt as much as he had expected, or maybe that was the alcohol talking. He looked over and saw Nobu’s eyebrows drawn up, his focus completely on the work ahead of him. Kuroo looked over and saw Bokuto nodding off in the corner, his bicep covered in a shiny wrap. He felt like laughing aloud, throwing his head back and just laugh aloud. They had actually done it. Kenma and Keiji would slaughter them, but it’s all good, it’s all good. He was too drunk to think about what his cute little omega would do to him.

Kuroo looked at Nobu again, the man’s piercings shining from the light reflected on them. He looked at the many different patterns on his body, he could make out a snake, a heart and a lotus flower. He wondered if they were planned tattoos, or if they were in the heat of the moment type of tattoos. He thought about the design that would grace his left arm, matching Ko’s. He wondered if his family would get angry at him, before deciding that he didn’t give a fuck about anybody else’s opinion. The buzzing continued rhythmically, Kuroo closed his eyes and wondered how much time had passed already. But alas, he had too much beer instead of wine and didn’t waste time pondering the unknown, wine drunk him was a philosopher much to the dismay of sober him.

It was funny thinking about the fact how Ko and him hadn’t reached their limits yet, they could drink more and yet they didn’t. Maybe it was a sign of the times changing, the two alphas finally maturing. Which was a nice thought but a huge fucking lie, Nobu said that he wouldn’t tattoo them if they were absolutely wasted. He needed them to stay coherent enough to give him money, plus he didn’t want to deal with two dumbasses that cancelled each other’s brain cells out.

“What made you change your life like this?” Kuroo asked disturbing the peace they had created between each other.

“You are either really fucking drunk right now or you want to die,” Nobu replied wiping away the blood from the tattoo.

“It’s a mixture of both.”

Nobu raised his eyebrow,“this is why I don’t tattoo drunk people,” he muttered under his breath.

“Nobu! Don’t be that way buddy, I’m only like 65% drunk.”

Nobu sighed deeply, his nostrils flaring as he resumed working on the tattoo in quiet. “Right Ko?!” a loud yell of Kuroo made him want to strangle the alpha.

“Yeah! Obviously you’re right!” Bokuto yelled from the corner he was sitting in.

“You have absolutely no idea what’s happening right now,” Nobu facepalmed.

“Doesn’t matter, I got my bro’s back forever!” he proclaimed loudly.

“I fucking hate people,” Nobu muttered grabbing a mirror so that Kuroo could see his tattoo. “And with that said this is finished,” he gave the mirror to Kuroo who looked at the tattoo with laser sharp focus.

“Damnn,” he muttered,“Ko! Look at this fucking tattoo! Holy shit its so cool!”

“I know right!” Bokuto yelled out. Nobu facepalmed regretting every decision he had ever made. He was trying to right his wrongs but damn did these two idiots make it hard. The two dumbasses continued bragging about their tattoos for a full five minutes. “Nobu, who has the better tattoo?” Bokuto yelled out, glaring daggers at a smirking Kuroo.

“They are exactly the same,” he deadpanned, wondering who he had killed to deserve this type of friday night.

“That doesn’t matter!”

“Yeah! You can clearly see that I wear it better.”

“In your dreams kittykat.”

“Only if you’ll accompany me owlie.”

“You know it bro!”

“Bro!”

What. The. Actual. Fuck. Nobu knew for sure that he had killed some sort of saint to be stuck in this type of hell. He had learned from his mistake and would never take any drunk clients with hideous hairdos again. “The door is that way,” Nobu interrupted the flirting session that was going on, pointing at the door. The beta felt relief course through his body as both alphas headed towards the door.

“Thanks again Nobu!” Bokuto somehow managed to hoot excitedly.

“Yeah dude thanks!” Kuroo yelled. They were almost at the door when the bastard turned around. “We are definitely getting future tattoos done by you!” he smirked, closing the door behind him.

Nobu sat down and wondered if it was too late to turn himself in. With his luck those two idiots would manage to get arrested and somehow be sent to the same prison as him. Nobu wondered if this was God’s way of telling him to pray more often, at least the dumbasses had paid him well and had tipped generously.


The two alphas walked on the road side by side. The streets were dark and vacant, somehow even the wind had settled down. The two men walked slowly enjoying the stillness of everything. They were in a comfortable silence, feeling the exhaustion of everything beginning to creep on them. Nobu’s house wasn’t that far from the bar, both men stood still in the middle of the road. They looked at the options in front of them, they could either take a shortcut through the park and just call it a night or walk straight and go back to the bar. The man looked at each other, both of them nodding as they headed to the park. It was quiet deprived of children. The playing equipment sat untouched, Bokuto plopped down on the grass field.

“Kou?”

“Yeah Rou?”

“Whatcha doing buddy?” Kuroo asked plopping down next to the other alpha.

“It's too early to go home but it’s too late to go to the bar!” the alpha whined laying on his back.

Kuroo joined him laying down,“you’ve got a point there.” The pair laid in a comfortable silence, simply breathing in and out. They let themselves relax in the cold grass, eyes closed, simply enjoying each other’s company.

“Yo bro,” Bokuto started opening his eyes, looking at the stars. The wind blew through his hair softly caressing him.

“Yeah bro?” Kuroo asked, opening his eyes, looking at the stars above him, he shuffled trying to make himself more comfortable. Kuroo blinked, seeing golden cat-like eyes illuminated in the stars.

“Do you sometimes wonder what you did in your last life to have this life?” Bokuto asked, a seriousness lacing his voice that not many people were familiar with.

Kuroo sighed heavily,“all the damn time,” he whispered, the golden eyes winking at him. “I wonder what saint I rescued to have this life.”

“Me too.”

“Why’d you ask?”

Bokuto peeled his eyes away from the night sky to look at the lonely swings in the park. “Sometimes I look at you or Keiji or Kenma and I just feel so fucking happy.” Kuroo hummed, urging Bokuto to continue. “I feel so--I don’t---I guess scared that this feeling and thankfulness for life is only for now and--I don’t know man I’m rambling ignore that,” Bokuto finished of dejected looking back at the sky, blue eyes watching him curiously from above.

“The future is uncertain,” Kuroo started off hesitantly, eyes averted from the sky, focused on the damp grass around him. “It feels like the future won’t be as good as the present, and there is this--,” Kuroo gesture wildly with his hands,“this feeling that--there is this feeling that it could end at any second now.”

“Yeah,” Bokuto agreed softly,“that’s the feeling.”

The two men lay in silence deep in thought. Their arms sore from the tattoo and their heads heavy from the drinks they had.

“Kenma is it for me and always has been it for me. And the more I think about the future, the more I want everything you know? I want it all with him from the ups the downs, the high highs and the low lows. I want it all.”

“Yeah, I feel that. Keiji is it for me, when I look at him he doesn’t seem to belong here. It sometimes feels like he will slip through my fingers if I don’t hold on to him,” Bokuto tilted his head to the side, plucking grass that was surrounding them. “I want it all as well, the whole deal bro, the whole deal.”

“The white picket fence and the pool in the backyard.”

“You know it.”

“The whole deal, huh Ko?”

“The whole deal, T.”

“Me too. I wanna marry Kenma,” Kuroo spoke to nobody in particular. “I know we have been mated since fucking highschool, and still it isn’t enough. Is that selfish of me Ko? Wanting more even though I already have so much.”

“I don’t think you can be selfish when it comes to love bro, because if you could, I would be the most selfish bastard alive.”

Kuroo smiled,“who are you kidding Ko, you already are.”

“Fuck you.” The two men smiled at each other, it was a known fact that they were dumbasses and yet they were so much more than that. “When are you going to propose?”

“I don’t know man, I really don’t know. It is like an itch underneath my skin, that just intensifies the more time passes by.”

“Have you considered the fact that maybe you have a rash?”

“I fucking hate talking to you!”

“You know you love me!” Bokuto winked obnoxiously.

“You make me wanna chug a bottle of ethylene glycol.”

“Bro, stop! Don't use made up words!”

"It's not made up but go off I guess." The two alphas looked at each other and then turned their gazes back to the night sky above.

"I want to marry Keiji as well, I want to wake up for the rest of my life by looking at him, and when all is said and down I still want a little more."

"When are you going to propose?"

"I don't know bro, I don't know. It took me forever to confess to him even though I have always known that he was the one for me. It's so stupid how long I waited to make a move because I was afraid--"

"--It's not stupid bro. I waited forever to confess to Kenma," Kuroo let out a deep sigh, fingers running through his untameable hair. "It was the scariest thing I have ever done bro. I was so afraid of ruining what we had, that I didn't allow myself to entertain the idea of us being something more. Something we have always been but only with labels on it, for everybody to know that we already belonged together."

"I felt the same with Keiji, still do sometimes. I guess I'm just overwhelmed with how much I love him."

"I would give Kenma the world and more."

"Bro."

"Bro."

The two laid on the grass their minds drifting through different memories "You know what we should do?!"

"What Ko?"

"We should have kids around the same time, so that they can be best friends forever like us and grow up like siblings."

"Holy shit! We totally fucking should!” Kuroo grinned excitedly thinking of a little pup with an impossible bed head and big golden eyes running around with a grey haired pup that had slanted blue eyes. He saw the two pups tumbling around in a green backyard with a big pool, laughing aloud as the voices of two omega’s told them to be careful. “Ko did I ever tell you that you're a fucking genius? Like how do you come up with these great ideas?"

A smug smile made its way onto Bokuto's face, he felt like a king, one of the smartest human beings he knew called him a genius. He should tell Tetsurou about it. "Yo kittycat guess what?!"

"What owlie?!"

"I'm a fucking genius bro," Bokuto tapped his temple,"a fucking genius bro!"

"Yes you are bro!"

“I want pups now.”

“Me too.”

The two alphas sighed deeply,“Ko, do you think Kenma and Keiji are going to be angry we got tattoos while drunk?”

“Neah.”

“Neah?”

“Neah.”

“I’m keeping you to that, if they do get angry I’m throwing you under the bus,” Kuroo snickered at Bokuto’s offended expression.

“I will not hesitate to drag you down with me,” Bokuto grumbled, the two alphas continued talking about their omegas, losing track of time all the while giggling like three year olds.


“Keiji?!” Kenma shook his fellow omega frantically. The two had fallen asleep while waiting for their alphas to return. Kenma checked his phone again, the sun beams were silently intruding through the curtains. It was ten thirty in the morning and there was absolutely no sign of the alphas. Kenma craned his neck trying to see if their shoes were in the hallway, they were not. “Keiji,” he tried again shaking the omega.

“Hmm,” Keiji hummed turning sides, snuggling into the couch’s cushions. The TV was still on from the night before, a random channel playing in the background. The omegas had stayed up till three waiting for their alphas, only for them to never arrive. They had started to panic when they realized this and wondered when they should call the police. They had decided to wait for a few more hours before taking action and subsequently had fallen asleep.

“Keiji!” Kenma yelled, the omega awoke to the scent of distress.

“Kenma?” he asked groggily, wiping his blue eyes trying to wipe the sleep out of them. “What’s wrong?” he asked, before he realized how awfully quiet the apartment was. He sat up straight looking around, eyes widening,“they didn’t come?”

Kenma nodded not trusting himself. He knew logically that his alpha could take care of himself if it ever came to it, but that still didn’t stop the panic in his mind. Horrible scenarios were playing out in his mind, he had read of some big gangs using omegas in heat to lure young alphas in their prime, and then ‘taming’ them, if the alphas didn’t submit they would be used as examples. His alpha was probably dead, and Koutarou had watched him get killed and then he got murdered.

Kenma felt his heart pound hard against his ribcage. He tried to breath but couldn’t feel anything else but the panic that flowed through his veins. He knew that if his alpha were dead the excruciating pain of the mating bond would have alarmed him. Yet, he wondered if the lack of any feeling through the bond was just a testament of how weak his bond was. Maybe the universe knew how much better his alpha could do and decided to punish Kenma for taking something that wasn't meant for him. Yeah, that made sense.

"Kenma," he heard Keiji calling his name, the other omega seemed so far away. Maybe he was, Keiji had probably realized how awful of a friend Kenma was, and decided he didn't need that kind of negativity in his life. He was alone.

"Kenma," Keiji's voice was still so far away. "Hey Kenma, I need you to look at me. Please?"

Kenma felt Keiji's voice move closer to him, his vision had blurred but the edges slowly became sharper. He couldn't hear the background noises of the tv anymore, which means Keiji must have turned it off before leaving him. He feels his vision starting to blur again when he feels something cold press on his cheeks, directing his face towards the source of the coldness. His vision is too blurred to make out what is in front of him, but he can see the outline of something blue hovering in front of him. His eyes focused on the blue, his vision sharpened. Letting out a deep breath through his mouth, Kenma felt uncomfortably hot. The daze that had surrounded him slowly lifted up. Still feeling the lingering cold talons of the panic gripping his heart.

He shakily exhaled again,"sorry."

Keiji took Kenma's hands in his own,"don't," he whispered.

“What are we going to do?”

Keiji fiddled with his fingers, biting on his bottom lip. Several seconds passed as Keiji hummed to himself deep in thought,“we should try calling them before we decide anything.”

Kenma nodded, reaching out for his phone that was innocently resting on the coffee table. He opened it up and went to his contact list, he clicked on his alpha’s number and pressed the call button. He waited patiently before he was met with his alpha’s voicemail. He tried three more times feeling the panic starting to bubble again. Looking over at Keiji hoping the other omega had more success than him, he was met with a blank expression. Keiji’s eyes were void of any emotions, however Keiji was nervously tapping his foot and playing with his fingers. Kenma concluded that Keiji wasn’t able to reach Koutarou.

The two omega’s eyes met, both standing up putting their phones into their pockets and silently making their way to the front door where their shoes and coats were. They quickly slid their shoes on and zipped their jackets up. Keiji grabbed the keys from the key holder. Kenma opened the door and held it open for the other omega who closed and locked it.

“Do you know what bar they were going to go to?”

“I think it was the one near the main road, we’ll just take the shortcut through the park. And if they’re not there, we’ll check the one near the subway station. If they’re not in either we’ll go to the police and panic.” Keiji looked at Kenma, his eyes focused on the road ahead,“no panicking until we have gone to both bars.”

“No panicking,” Kenma nodded following Keiji.


It was really fucking cold. Goosebumps had formed on his arms, he tried rubbing his hands up and down his arms in hopes of warming them up. His efforts were futile, his entire shirt was soaked. He felt something tickling his nose, he scrunched his nose only for the tickling to intensify, the feeling made its way down his face. He tilted his head to the side,“Kou cut it out,” he murmured. The tickling didn’t stop, instead he could feel something poke his ribs, Kuroo could feel his irritation rise,“cut it out!” he yelled getting up to confront his friend only to be met with three children looking at him. He blinked blearly bringing his hand up to rub the sleep out of him.

“He woke up!” one child screeched throwing the stick he was holding at Kuroo before dashing away.

“What the--wait where’s Kenma? Where the fuck,” Kuroo moved his head side to side looking for his omega he noticed that he was in the park and put two and two together,“shit.” Bokuto was snoring loudly curled into himself, Kuroo could only wonder how much dirt they both had ingested. He felt cold all over and the pounding in his head didn’t help his current predicament. His body shivered involuntarily and goosebumps formed on his arms. He would get sick for sure. “Kou!,” he kicked Bokuto’s back.

“Hmm,” the other alpha mumbled incoherently.

“Wake up!” Kuroo kicked Bokuto again.

“Ah!” the alpha screamed getting up and rubbing his back,“what was that for?!”

“To wake you up. We need to get home bro.”

“Where are--Keiji!” Bokuto sat up quickly a huge smile making its way on his face as he excitedly waved at the omega. Kuroo also sat up straighter as he saw Kenma approaching a smile making itself known on his face while looking at his other half. Before either alpha could get another word in they were met with two fuming omegas, the alphas gulped, flaming eyes were barely concealing the emotions felt by the omegas. Both alphas looked at each other, they were fucked.

“Both of you get up,” Akaashi hissed raising a hand to stop their protests.

“Save you excuses for when we get home,” Kenma added. The alphas wordlessly got up, Kenma took Kuroo’s hand while Akaashi took Bokuto’s. The omegas did not trust their idiot alphas after all the stress they had experienced. “This is the only time we’ll ever do something like this.”

“If this happens again you can just rot here by yourselves.”

The walk home was quiet. Neither alpha even made a sound when they finally reached their apartment the couples went into their own bedrooms. The alphas send a quick panicked look to each other hoping they would see each other again before the doors were slammed close.


The tattoo was gorgeous objectively speaking, a long vine that wrapped around the alpha’s bicep with flowers in between the leaves. Kenma didn’t have any flower knowledge and thus didn’t know what it was, but that didn’t take away from the fact that it was gorgeous. The petals on the flowers were outlined with a creamy-yellow, that slowly transitioned into an ombre of pink before transforming back into yellow with brown streaks. The vines and leaves were a dark green that made the peaceful flowers pop more. Kenma felt himself blush a little as he realized how good the tattoo looked as a whole on his alpha’s body. He wanted to trace the tattoo following it with his finger, memorize its turns and twists to memory. He wanted to taste it, outline it with his tongue, feel the difference on the skin. Alas, he had to wait until it healed, he could have his fun later for now he had to give the alpha a piece of his mind.

“Kenma I’m--”

“--don’t bother apologizing,” Kenma cut Kuroo off harshly. The icy talons of the panic he had experienced earlier still hadn’t melted away. Kuroo was usually so perceptive of what Kenma was feeling that the alphas dismissal felt weird. The warmth of the bond hadn’t coursed through Kenma’s veins which meant that the alpha was purposefully keeping him out. Kenma felt his blood boiling, he had been worried about this asshole, had almost sent Keiji and himself into a panic attack. And his alpha still had the audacity to keep him out.

Kuroo looked at him hazel eyes meeting golden ones. The alpha and omega were in an intense battle demanding to be heard. Demanding the other to read between the lines and understand. The foundation of their relationship was built on their ability to read between the lines to understand each other, now with the pair refusing to do it, it seemed an old wound had opened. They had been here once before.

Kenma broke eye contact first feeling his eyes start to water, the anger left his body with the steady stream of tears escaping his eyes. The dam had broken, exhaustion finally caught him. His whole body felt heavy, bones felt like they were made of steel. A steady pounding in his head intensified its rhythm, banging harder.

“Kitten,” Kuroo cooed cradling his omega in his lap. Kenma’s eyes were tightly shut, his already pale skin had become paler. Kuroo let the warmth of their mating bond course through them. The pair was engulfed with the warmth of Kuroo’s love for Kenma. Yet it wasn’t enough. With the warmth of love, there was an ice cold feeling. A chill that crept on them, the negative emotions Kenma felt started to overpower the love.

Kuroo breathed in deeply, he would not lose this fight. He closed his eyes and focused all his thoughts on his omega. His mouth curled upwards as he felt the coldness slowly fade away, he smiled while Kenma nuzzled more into him.

“I’m sorry for worrying you,” Kuroo tried to get his thoughts in order. He didn’t have a valid excuse for keeping his omega out, without revealing all his future plans.

Kenma sniffed,“why?”

Silent questions surrounded the alpha. Why did you try to keep me out? What are you hiding? Why would you put so much strain on us? Did I do something? Kuroo had known Kenma for long enough to entail what the why meant and all the silent questions it held. He swallowed the guilt that had formed in the back of his throat for hurting his omega.

“I felt ashamed.”

“You have done more embarrassing things.”

In every lie there is a grain of truth, Kuroo had felt ashamed but it wasn’t for the reason his omega thought so. He was ashamed that he had to become drunk to confess to himself what he wanted from the future. He felt embarrassed that he couldn’t find it in himself to reveal to his omega why.

Kenma grabbed his face carefully tilting it towards him. Kenma’s big cat-like golden eyes stared at his face, searching for the truth, the unknown, the secret his alpha felt like hiding. He exhaled shakily before nodding,“it’s okay, you don’t have to tell me right now.” He bore his eyes into Kuroo’s,“I trust you Tetsu.”

Kuroo smiled a genuine smile,“I love you Kenma.” Kenma huffed, cheeks reddening slightly, Kuroo leaned in closer to him playfully nibbling on his ear,“plus you totally dig my tattoo!”

Kenma facepalmed, he was mated to an idiot, “do not,” he lied through his teeth.

“Do too.”

“Do not.”

“Do too.”

“Shut up,” Kenma grumbled getting out of Kuroo’s lap. Kuroo whined reaching out for him. “Uh uh,” Kenma tutted,“you are so not getting any for the next two weeks.”

“Two weeks?! Kenma bab--”

“Keep on begging and I’ll make it a month plus your gross.” Before Kuroo could object his omega walked out of the room playing a game on his psp. Kuroo sighed and flopped backwards onto the bed, he should get ready to take a shower, but he had a feeling his best friend had already beaten him to it.


Kenma walked into the living room seeing Keiji already sitting on the couch reading a book. He joined the other omega, Akaashi put his book on the coffee table readjusting the blanket he had draped over himself so that it covered both of them. Akaashi picked up his book and began reading again, the minutes ticked by as the pair was engulfed in a comfortable silence.

Kenma cleared his throat before he could get anything out Akaashi raised his hand signalling him to stop. “Koutarou didn’t start the shower yet,” he whispered. Kenma nodded continuing to play his game. The pair heard water being turned on, they knew they had to be quiet in case the other alpha overheard their conversation. Sometimes it was hard living in such tight quarters with the four of them.

“Did you yell at Ko?”

“No,” Keiji sighed.

“Weakling,” Kenma smirked, hearing Akaashi loudly exhale.

“In my defense he was feeling dejected and knew what he had done was wrong.”

“Tt tt,” Kenma tutted,“you are such a pushover Keiji, I could never.”

“Shut up, we both know that the-anxiety-giver will have you underneath him by tonight.”

Kenma rolled his eyes,“yeah but it isn’t like he’ll know that…” Keiji the little smug bastard just snorted flipping the page of his book.

The pair could hear some humming coming from the bathroom.“What did you think of the tattoo?” Akaashi asked looking up from his book finally discussing the topic he really wanted to talk about.

Kenma paused his game, looking his fellow omega in the eye,“it was pretty nice--”

“--it’s hot.”

“Oh definitely. I had a minor breakdown not knowing whether I wanted to jump Tetsu or kick him.”

“Same, when I saw Koutarou’s,” Akaashi inhaled sharply,“I kid you not Kenma I started salivating. I barely kept a straight face.”

“Me too Keiji.”

“They can never find out.”

“Obviously, our lives would never be the same again. Do you by any chance know what the flowers are?”

Akaashi nodded,"They're Alstroemerias also known as Peruvian lilies, they represent devotion and friendship."

"That's very poetic and deep."

Akaashi hummed,"you sure we grabbed the right idiots?"

Kenma snorted,"this means we still have a chance to return them."

The omegas giggled looking at each other before returning back to their respective activities. The sound of Kenma’s video game travelling through the room, creating a peaceful atmosphere. The peacefulness was interrupted when they hear loud sneezes coming from two different places in the apartment. Both omegas face palmed and wondered if it was truly too late to exchange the two idiots.