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Kids

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SNAPE
Kids!
Do you know what's wrong with these kids today?
Kids!
Chuck 'em out and then lock them all away!
Kids!
An idiot or insuff'rable know-it-all!
Trouble making, cauldron breaking
Morons!
And while we're on the subject

Scars!
Potter thinks he's a real celeb with one!
Scars!
So he lived, so what, 'cause what's done is done!
And yet all of my students
Worship him and I say
What's the matter with kids today?!

Kids!
(spoken, imitating Harry Potter)
I'm Harry Potter, worship me because of the injury on my forehead!
(sung)
Kids!
(spoken, imitating Hermione Granger raising her hand)
Oh! Call on me! I suffer from Know-it-all-ititus!
(sung)
Kids!
(spoken, imitating Neville Longbottom melting a cauldron)
Oops! Golly gee, I'm hopeless! That's the...never mind, I forgot how to count.

(sung)
Dunderheads with
A brain of lead
Dumbells!

And while we're on the subject
Kids!
They are always putting toes out of line!
Kids!
What they need is a smack on their behind!
I'd curse them on purpose if
I taught DADA!
What's the matter with kids today?!?!