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Fanboy & Waifu

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The door unlocked with a click and Katsuki shouldered it open as the bags in his hands rustled. He let out a little sigh because he was finally home and was admittedly a bit irked by the fact that he’d had to do the shopping even though he had worked all day and he knew Izuku hadn’t left the house once. The only reason he had done it was because Izuku had confessed to having a friend over and that they had been so caught up that he hadn’t gone shopping. Katsuki had been closer so he had just decided, fuck it, and grabbed what he had known that they needed. 

“I’m home!” He called out, not hiding his irritation because for one thing Izuku knew what he had been marrying into when he had chosen to marry Katsuki. “I got your stupid sweet Pocky shit, Izuku! You owe me!”

There was a cry of delight from the living room before a scramble of feet presented Izuku to Katsuki. The other man was grinning, clearly in a fantastic mood as his smile seemed to light up the very air around them. If Katsuki wasn’t already mostly-used to the man he would be blinded by the sight. Despite himself, his heart still flipped and lightened at seeing his husband so happy. He really was super cute, damn him. The fact that he was wearing one of Katsuki’s shirts only made him all the more appealing.

“Thank you, Kacchan! And welcome home!” Izuku threw himself at Katsuki and Katsuki held his arms a little to the sides expecting a hug (and not wanting to get the bags in the way) but Izuku just went straight for the bags and grabbed the two boxes of strawberry and chocolate Pocky before fleeing back to the living room. His temporary good mood gone, Katsuki scowled and followed him. Where the fuck was his welcome home kiss after all the bullshit he’d gone through having to deal with going to the store?

“Oi-!” He called, but cut off when he saw Izuku’s guest. He had to do a double-take before he stared with baffled eyes at another Izuku. Or was it? They were similar for sure, but there were differences as well. For one thing he was short. Like, a good head shorter than Izuku which made him almost two heads shorter than Katsuki. For another he was wearing a pink apron that was one step away from being a dress. What the fuck was this? 

“Hi!” The man (boy??) called, waving. Izuku threw himself down onto the couch next to him and handed him the strawberry Pocky. They had Izuku’s computer up in front of them and seemed to be looking at someone’s blog. Not Izuku’s because Katsuki would recognize that.

“What the hell? Who is this cosplaying gremlin?” He demanded, pointing at the shorter Izuku. 

The Izuku puffed out his cheeks in a little pout, “I’m not a gremlin! Meanie!”

“Kacchan, quit being mean to my little gremlin friend!” Izuku cried on his behalf.


Izuku laughed and gave the other a smile that showed he was just joking around. Katsuki crossed his arms, bags rustling with the movement as he waited. “Seriously? You have fans that cosplay you now?”

“He learned what cosplay is!” The gremlin said with delight and a devious glint to his eyes that betrayed the adorable face he had on. How were his freckles even cuter? Maybe because he was more baby-faced than Izuku was? Goddamn both of them.

“I know, I’m so proud of him.” Izuku pretended to wipe a tear from his eye.

“I’ve known what cosplay is for months, you little shits!” Katsuki snapped at them.

“Here, let me help you with the groceries and I’ll explain!” He turned back to the gremlin, “Izuku, we’ll be back in a few moments. Make yourself at home!”

“Okay! I’m gonna keep looking through this Shouto-kun’s blog then!” The gremlin gave them a wave and time for privacy. Izuku hopped back off of the couch and took one of the bags from his husband before leading the way into the kitchen. Katsuki shot a suspicious look towards the gremlin as he followed him in.

“He’s not a cosplayer.” Izuku explained as he emptied the bag and started putting stuff away. “He’s me. Well, a different me. Jeez, Kacchan, don’t you know your alternate universe tropes yet? I know you read fanfiction.”

“Fuck you, I don’t read fanfiction.” Katsuki denied, a little too quickly for it to be a believable lie. “He’s not cosplaying as you? He’s kind of… weird.” Something about him seemed off to Katsuki. Probably just because he looked so different and yet the same as his husband. It was a fucking good cosplay.

“What do you mean, ‘weird’?” Izuku laughed a little. “There’s nothing weird about him! It’s not like he’s a villain or something. He’s an alternate me. Like, from another universe.” He paused while Katsuki made a face. Some kind of quirk nonsense? “It’s hard to explain, but our worlds are connected I guess. I don’t know the details, but Izuku has been a huge fan of my blog! He was in town, so we decided to meet up! We’ve been chatting online for a little while.”

“And you didn’t fucking tell me you were talking to another you?!” Katsuki asked, jumping on board this crazy circumstance because he had learned the hard way a long time ago that it was easier to just ride the wave of insanity that seemed to circle Izuku like a shark in blood-filled water than it was to question it. Though he wanted to know how the hell this other Izuku could “be in town” when he was from an alternate universe. Whatever.

“I honestly thought he was kinning me.”

“For fuck’s sake, Izuku.”

“What?! I’ve met a lot of weird people on the internet! Stop judging me!”

“Absolutely never.”

Anyway, ” Izuku stressed, giving Katsuki a half-hearted glare, “he’s just visiting for a while until his own husband gets home. He’s really nice! We’re both huge fans of Ground Zero!”

“If he follows your blog, I’m not surprised.” Katsuki put the milk away and closed the door before thinking for a moment. “His husband…”

“Is alternate you, yes.” Izuku responded with a teasing smile. He walked over to wrap his arms around Katsuki’s waist and finally give him his welcome home kiss. “Seems like I can’t even resist you in other universes.”

“At least alternate me has good taste, for a shotacon.”

“How do you even know that term?!”

“Get the fuck back to your guest!” Katsuki snapped at him instead of answering because he would rather not admit to how he had learned that term. He regretted every aspect of knowing anything about fandom or the weirdness of the internet. His life was simpler before Fanboy came into his life.

Izuku shot him a look that told him this wasn’t over before he listened and he returned to the other Izuku. Katsuki continued to put the groceries away and moved onto the dishes as well as he eyed the two from his position. He could hear them clearly as they spoke, first gushing over Shouto’s shitty tumblr blog before moving onto talking about their favorite subject: Katsuki.

“Your Kacchan is definitely meaner than mine.” Gremlin Izuku said, nodding sagely. “He’s angrier a lot.”

“That’s just Kacchan. He’s all bark and no bite unless it’s in bed or you piss him off for real.” Izuku responded.

“‘All bark and no bite’, my ass.” Katsuki grumbled under his breath. He would show Izuku his “bite” later. Maybe to one of those cute freckled cheeks of his. 

“I mean, my Kacchan can be rough too! But it’s kind of neat to see the differences! I think both are cool, though.”

“Based on what you said, you two had a smoother childhood history in terms of your relationship, at least.”

“Ehh… it’s still not great…” 

Right. Alternate Izuku and alternate Katsuki. Could their lives have ended up however theirs did? It was weird to think about. Katsuki was admittedly curious. But looking over at shota Izuku, he probably had lived an extremely different life despite having ended up marrying alternate Katsuki as well. Katsuki just felt a little smug that he had managed to get a cute Izuku in another world too. Fuck you, anyone who had tried to court Izuku in the past!

“Okay, but since you know both, which do you like more?” Izuku asked eagerly. There was a slight edge to his tone, as if threatening shota Izuku to choose incorrectly. Katsuki could not tell you for the life of him which would be the ‘correct answer’, but he obviously knew he was the coolest no matter what.

“Obviously my Kacchan, silly!” The pink gremlin said with a bright smile on his face, but that same slightly threatening tone in his own voice. Oh yeah, they were definitely the same person even if their speech patterns and appearances were a little different. 

“That’s fair.” Izuku said, ignoring the warning, “Even if you’re wrong.”

“I’m not wrong! My Kacchan is super cool!” He puffed out his cheeks in offence. 

“Your Kacchan is probably really cool, but mine is the best.” 

“Your Kacchan may be the best here, but he is not better than mine!”

“That’s not-”

“Holy shit, stop arguing!” Katsuki barked at both of them. “We’re the same goddamn person, you dumb assholes! Quit embarrassing yourselves!”

“This is very important!” They both cried back. Pink Izuku even flipped to look at Katsuki while kneeling on the couch and, holy fuck? Did he just see pink flowers bounce off of him? Was he going insane?

“It’s dumb and you’re both being dumb!” He responded.

Izuku huffed and crossed his arms before looking away from the smaller Izuku. The other one did the same. There was a hard silence as both of them stewed in their irritation and the sheer affront at the thought that anyone would claim their Katsuki wasn’t the best. Katsuki didn’t know whether to be embarrassed or to preen over the defense of his title. Izuku was a stubborn shit when it came to him.

The silence didn’t last for very long as Izuku turned back to the other and said, “Fine. Your Kacchan is the coolest in your world, but mine is the coolest here. Deal?”

The smaller Izuku turned back to his friend and considered before nodding and smiling. “Deal!” They shook on it. “Actually, I’ve been meaning to ask you something… Do you have a quirk?” There was a hesitancy to his tone. Katsuki glanced up from where he was drying the dishes to watch them.

Izuku shook his head. “No, I was born quirkless.”

“Ah…” The smaller man frowned sympathetically. Katsuki watched his husband’s shoulders tense a little bit.

“Do you?” 

“...Nope.” The man shook his head and gave a rueful smile. “I don’t. I wish I did, though!”

Izuku’s shoulders relaxed. “Me too. I can defend myself and I train and such, but having a quirk would be nice! It would probably help against those who try to come after me because I’m married to Ground Zero.”

The other’s mouth opened to say something, confused, then closed. After a beat he opened it again to say, “I have the same problem! Have you been kidnapped before as well?”

The mug in Katsuki’s hand cracked a bit when he clenched it too hard. He didn’t like the thought of this smaller, cuter Izuku being kidnapped anymore than his own husband.

“Oh man, yeah.” Izuku frowned with worry. “You too?”

“Mm-hm. But my baby saved me! Yours too?”

“Yeah.” Izuku popped one of his chocolate Pockys into his mouth and wiggled it as he spoke around it, “Although the villains who took me got away. They escaped the police cruisers while being transferred.”

“Oh?” The other asked in a light voice. “Do you know who they are?” 

“Yeah. But they’re being searched for, so it’s okay! And I’m better prepared now!” Izuku reassured him. Katsuki didn’t like remembering that time. He had never felt terror more visceral than in that moment when he had realized his husband had been taken by villains.

The smaller man had his cell phone out now and texting. There was a concerned frown on his face, “That’s good! Who were they, though? I don’t remember seeing anything on your blog.”

“I didn’t want to report it there.” He confessed, scratching at the back of his head. “It’s supposed to be a fun blog and… well, I figured maybe the news would catch wind considering my marriage to Kacchan is still new and we’re still making waves.”

“I’m sorry you had to go through that.” Izuku put the phone into his apron pocket and took Izuku’s hand in his to squeeze. “It’s really scary!”

“I’m more worried for you.” Izuku responded with concern, “I can defend myself, but you’re so small!” The fact that he was scrawny and lacking any real muscle was implied. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine!” Izuku assured him. His phone pinged a cute little chime. He grabbed it back out and glanced at the screen before gasping with delight, “Oh! My baby’s coming home! I’d better get going!”

“Oh really? I’ll walk you to the train station!” Izuku said, following the other boy. Katsuki joined them because it was only polite to help to see their guest out. He had wanted to talk with the other Izuku a bit himself, but he supposed that was what happened when he came home so late. It was already nearing sunset, after all.

“No worries!” The smaller man said. “I can walk myself! It’s not too far.”

“To what, the portal you go through or whatever?” Katsuki asked because honestly now he kind of really wanted to know how the hell this was possible. 

“No, silly! To my house!” There was a playful look to his eye as he looked Katsuki up and down.

“Wait!” Izuku cried, “Your present! Let me get a bag.”

“Oh right!” The other man said. Izuku ran off and left the two of them standing there. Katsuki wondered what kind of present it was. “It was nice to meet you, Kacchan!” The gremlin said to fill the silence. Katsuki felt weird having to look so far down to look at him.

“Yeah, same I guess. Is alternate me shorter as well?” He had to know. And now he had a huge fear that his other self might actually be a shotacon. Maybe all of those weirdly-drawn doujins about him and Fanboy were actually accurate in another universe?

“Yeah, kind of.” Izuku motioned about the difference between them.

“Oh fuck.” He muttered.

“Here you go!” Katsuki’s husband returned with a small gift bag, black with orange paper in it so obviously Ground Zero-themed, and handed it over. “For you!”

“Thank you so much, Izuku! I hope you enjoy my gift to you as well!” He giggled a little. “I know it’s worth its while!”

“I know mine will be too!” Izuku assured him.

“And don’t worry about being kidnapped, okay? I’m sure the police will find those villains in no time.” The smile on the smaller Izuku’s face was cheerful to the point of being almost a little sinister. “You’ll be safe soon!”

“I think so too.” Izuku agreed, not seeming bothered at all. “Message me when you’re home, okay? And I’ll find the link to that one picture I was talking about earlier!”

“Okay~! Bye bye!” The man left then with a wave and closed the door behind him.

“Seriously? You don’t get weird vibes from that guy?” Katsuki demanded as soon as the door was shut.

“What are you talking about?” Izuku asked, confused.

Maybe it was just him. Katsuki frowned but shook his head. He was just another Izuku. He had probably just gone through different life experiences to make him seem a little bit different. He was harmless to look at. Katsuki must have just been thrown off by his cuteness. He was an innocent through and through. Hell, his Izuku was probably more dangerous.

“Never mind. Let’s get dinner already. I’m freaking starving. And tell me about this gift you got.”

Izuku’s smile was practically predatory, “Oh, you’ll find out. But not now. I want to surprise you with it.” He pulled Katsuki down into a kiss that promised much to come. Katsuki may have to reevaluate that other Izuku later, he decided before he let the experience go. 

Chapter Text

Izuku glanced down at his phone and then back up at the house he was standing in front of. It was a beautiful home, and he could admit that it would be a home that he himself wouldn’t mind having. The entire neighborhood was nice. Unassuming. It felt very much like the neighborhood Izuku had grown up in. It was kind of nice. It was hard to believe this was a house in a whole other universe. He wondered if there was one like this in his universe. He would have to research it. Maybe ask Izuku how much he and his husband had paid for it.

He entered the gate and walked up to the house. He hesitated to knock on the door mostly because his counterpart had said it would be fine if he didn’t. The other Izuku had messaged him saying that he would be home in a little while to meet with him. Izuku had arrived early for their meeting because the travel time had been surprisingly faster than he had expected. He hovered awkwardly outside, scratching at the back of his head.

His phone pinged and then let off a tiny explosion to alert him to a message. He opened it up to see it was a message from his own husband, finally responding to the message he had sent him this morning. He must have been busy with work. Judging by what time it was, he was probably breaking for lunch.



You’re just hopping universes? The fuck??


Yup! I’m already here!


He snapped a selfie of himself in front of the house, smiling wide enough that his dimple showed, and then sent it off to his husband.


I’m hovering like a stalker outside waiting for other Izuku.


Don’t get arrested in another universe. I’ll kick your ass

how did you get there anyway


Izuku had been about to respond, but the door burst open to the house and startled him enough that he jumped with shock. He fumbled his phone and spun around to find Todoroki dressed in a suit and an apron glaring him down. Izuku almost felt a little cowed if he wasn’t already super fucking confused as well as used to his husband’s scarier glares.

“What are you doing here?” Todoroki demanded.

“I, uh, I was just-”

“You’re not skipping out on work again, are you?” There was something dangerous to his tone. Izuku didn’t think the man was using his ice quirk, but he felt the air chill as he approached Izuku. He was holding a feather duster threateningly. He cringed a little as Todoroki towered over him. He felt like a kid who had been caught sneaking out by his mother. He was abruptly glad his mother had never been strict with him. “There is a mountain of paperwork that I refuse to do for you once more. You’re going to do it today, or you will deal with the consequences.”

Izuku didn’t know what he was talking about. “Wh-What?! Paperwork?! I think you’re mistaken-”

“You can’t get out of this, boss.” Todoroki growled and holy shit?? Izuku had never seen his Todoroki like this. The man was usually so calm and not super expressive. This one was scary! What the hell?! The man grabbed Izuku’s arm. “Let’s go.”

“Wait, Todoroki-kun, I-”

Todoroki looked at him sharply and commanded, “Be. Quiet.”

Izuku only squeaked and did as he was told.

Before he knew it, Izuku was sat at a desk piled with the aforementioned mountain of paperwork and absolutely no idea where he was. Todoroki had ditched him almost as soon as he had glared Izuku down until he had started working on the paperwork, so now Izuku was relatively alone. He glanced around him to see people coming and going. Most of them were faces he didn’t recognize, but to his shock he noticed there were a few other heroes as well. None of them were wearing their hero uniforms, but Izuku could easily recognize Uraraka and Kaminari and such. Where the hell was he?

He glanced down at the papers in front of him. Todoroki had called him ‘boss’. He was definitely being mistaken for the other Izuku, though he wasn’t quite sure how. Yeah his baggie jacket (that he had stolen from Kacchan) made him seem smaller than he was, but there was still a height difference between him and the other Izuku. And since when was that other guy a boss? Izuku had told him that he was a housewife (and a very cute one at that). So what was all of this paperwork and this organization?! Everyone was wearing suits and looked professional even though it seemed like they were in some kind of underground place? Maybe?? Izuku couldn’t really remember how he had gotten here.

He read over the paperwork curiously and saw that most of the documents just needed signatures. He steadily began to make his way through them and learned very, very quickly that something definitely wasn’t right. There were information about heroes and villains here. There were reports from various people that were part of whatever organization Izuku was the boss of. There were WAY too many people apparently spying on this world’s Ground Zero. Izuku signed off on everything to show they have been checked while feeling kind of dizzy.

Izuku was so curious about this mystery in front of him that he just kept going. What was this about a murder? A hit squad? Holy shit, was this something about the yakuza? Was Izuku part of a secret police force or something? Was that why he’d had to say he was a housewife? If that was true, then Izuku was super impressed. And actually pretty jealous. How had his life gone so differently than Izuku’s? Being part of a police force was something he had considered but had never followed that path when he had been offered a job at a young age. Maybe that was where his life had gone differently. His blog had changed everything.

The paperwork was utterly exhausting, but the read was fascinating. It triggered all of his reporter senses. But a feeling of dread began to run over him like fountain water over a statue as things began to click into place. This… this wasn’t a police force. These documents hinted that they were avoiding police. And that they were killing people on a regular basis. There were reports of destroyed buildings and collateral damage. This wasn’t normal. 

Oh god. Was Izuku a villain?

He was interrupted multiple times by various heroes and others he didn’t recognize. He chatted cheerfully with Kaminari and the Shining Hero. He had also talked with a guy that had a severed hand on his shoulder and seemed kind of familiar. All of them clearly thought he was their boss. At this point he was too afraid to correct any of them. 

It was only when he was alone again did he quickly grab his phone and he texted his husband once more. He saw that he had missed a couple of messages from him. He hoped that he was still on break or something. He needed someone to know he was here, anyway. He turned on his GPS location.




Izuku what the hell don’t ignore me

Just text me when you’re on your way back. I’m making dinner tonight probably.


Kacchan I think Todoroki just kidnapped me


He didn’t get a response for a little while. His husband must be busy again. Izuku continued doing the paperwork out of sheer self-preservation. He figured that once he got this done he could reasonably leave, right? He couldn’t give out orders or anything. At some point someone would recognize he wasn’t the right Izuku. He kept himself looking small in his chair and hoped that it helped.

He grabbed his phone as soon as he heard the small explosion notification.




What are you talking about?!


I don’t know what’s going on Kacchan but I think that my other self might actually be a villain and now I’m at his lair and nobody knows I’m not him so they keep giving me his paperwork and holy shit Kacchan this set up is crazy I’m reading the stuff that they do and it’s amazing and terrifying at the same time I’m gonna try to come home as soon as I can if you don’t hear from me regularly over the next two hours assume that I’ve been caught I love you very much and my GPS is on




No just wait! I need to talk with my other self






I swear to god I will kill you myself if this goes sideways! I can’t get your damn GPS location. 


I’ll figure this out just please wait I’ll keep in contact my other self has to be around here somewhere.

If it does go sideways, feel free to kill me. I’d rather you do it than anyone else




The door opened and Izuku stashed his phone again, his heart racing in his chest and hoping that Kacchan didn’t come after him. His husband was amazing, but there was no way he could take down all of these people on his own. This was a huge organization. It looked even bigger than the League of Villains from his world. Unless Kacchan brought his own hero army with him, there was a high chance he would be killed. And judging by the fact that everyone just accepted that he was this world’s Izuku, they probably didn’t know about their connected alternate universe.

The man who entered stopped dead in his tracks upon seeing Izuku sitting in the chair. Izuku smiled at him and tried not to look as nervous as he felt and hoped that he wouldn’t get scolded for being on his phone. He didn’t want Todoroki coming after him again. 

“Who are you?” The man’s voice was instantly hostile and on guard. Izuku stiffened with surprise and he clenched his phone in his hand. His phone started to buzz with a call. Oh fuck, his husband was gonna lose his mind.

“Wh-what?” He asked, playing dumb. 

“I said, who are you?” The man stalked forward. “And what have you done with our boss?!”

Nothing for it. He was the only one to have figured Izuku out. He would have to try his best. “Th-this is a mistake, I swear! I was brought here by Todoroki! I don’t really know what’s going on!”

“I won’t ask you again! You’re not my babycakes, so where is he?!”

Izuku paused. “B-Babycakes?” He stuttered. He’d heard that nickname before. Never to him, of course, but Izuku had told him before about his Kacchan calling him it. But this guy did not look like his Kacchan. His hair and voice were way too different. He knew his other self wasn’t a cheater, though. Maybe this world’s Kacchan just looked different? Or it was a disguise, maybe? “Kacchan?” He asked hesitantly.

The man scowled and grabbed Izuku’s rolling chair, trapping him in it. His voice was dangerously low as he barked at him, “Don’t you fucking call me that, imposter!”

“Oh my god, you’re Kacchan.” He whispered to himself. He had to act fast. “W-Wait! Before you get upset, I am Izuku! I'm KingBaku! The one that your husband has been chatting with! I was going to visit him today and I was brought here instead!” He sincerely hoped that the other Izuku had talked about him with his husband or else he was fucked. Yes he didn’t mind if Kacchan killed him, but he wanted it to be his Kacchan. And preferably he would like to have one last kiss and fuck. Die happy, y’know?

The man didn’t respond for a moment. He was wearing some kind of visor that covered his eyes and made it so Izuku couldn’t read his expression. His scowl had turned into a frown, though. Izuku knew those lips anywhere. He had kissed them many times at this point. He was certain this was Kacchan now.

The man pushed away from him then and stalked back over to the door. He locked it and then turned back to him. He touched the blue glowing crystal that was on his outfit and suddenly he transformed. In moments he was the Kacchan Izuku had always known, complete with civilian clothing. He gave Izuku a wary and searching look.

“KingBaku?” He approached him once more with much less hostility. “Ground Zero’s number one fanboy?”

Izuku could cry with relief. “Yeah! That’s me!” He pulled on his shirt that had Ground Zero’s symbol over the breast pocket. “This is my Kacchan’s jacket and everything! I swear I’m not lying!”

“I believe you.” This Kacchan (that was confusing. Katsuki it was) said. “I don’t think anyone else knows about your blog other than me and my babycakes.”

“Oh my god, it’s so cute that you call him that.”

“Yeah?” He perked up a bit, a small smile on his lips. Izuku nearly melted. Katsuki was different from his Kacchan for sure. He could already tell what this world’s Izuku had meant by his Katsuki being nicer. “I think so too. Your Katsuki doesn’t call you that?”

“He calls me baby sometimes, but usually he just calls me by my name.”

“That’s cute too.” Then Katsuki sobered up. “You can’t be here, though. The others didn’t recognize you, but it's only a matter of time before babycakes shows up. We need to get you out of here.”

“Okay, yeah! I was trying to figure out how to get out anyway!” Izuku jumped to his feet. Katsuki seemed startled at the height change. This Katsuki was about the same height as Izuku’s Kacchan. “I think if we don't get out of here soon, my own Kacchan will freak out. I was texting him.”

Katsuki winced. “He’s a hero too, right?”


“Knowing myself, that won’t end well.” He muttered. Then louder he said, “I can get you out. Just follow me.” He touched the crystal and transformed once more into his disguise. His voice changed as well to complete the disguise. Izuku was a little in awe, but now that he wasn’t being threatened he let himself look over Katsuki’s outfit. Hot damn he looked good. Would it be inappropriate to flirt with this Katsuki? Yeah, probably. His friend might kill him even though he had a feeling this Katsuki wouldn’t mind if he flirted with him.

“Wait, before we go!” Izuku called, stopping the man from opening the door, “Let me text my husband so he doesn’t burn down the city looking for me.”

“Good idea.” 




Izuku, UPDATE?!




Izuku decided it would just be better to call him. Texting would just make him more upset. So he pressed the call button and brought the phone to his ear. Kacchan picked up on the second ring,

“WHAT IS GOING ON?!” He yelled.

Izuku winced and pulled the phone from his ear. Katsuki seemed to be staring at him, although it was hard to tell with the visor on. He brought the phone back, “Kacchan! I’m safe right now, I swear!”

“You’re in a villain’s lair!”

“I know, I know! But the other Kacchan is here! He’s going to get me out of here.”

“My other self?”


“Let me talk to him.”

Izuku gave a confused frown and then held the phone out to the other man. “Um… He wants to talk with you?”

Katsuki took the phone, “Yeah?”

Izuku could hear his husband’s voice through the small speaker, “If you fuck this up, I will find you and murder you slowly, you hear?”

Katsuki let out an affronted noise, “I wouldn’t hurt him! What the hell?!”

“And don’t you fucking touch him either! He might be a goddamn pervert, but you better not fall for his tricks!”

“I heard that!” Izuku cried, blushing because his husband had predicted his thoughts. 

“I don’t cheat! Not even with my babycakes’ counterpart!” The other Katsuki said, puffing up in annoyance.

“What the fuck kind of nickname is babycakes?! Fucking hell, how gay can you get?”

“You-!” Katsuki attempted, but Izuku snatched back the phone before the two could go off on each other.

“I’ll contact you soon! Love you, Zero, bye!” Then he hung up.

“That son of a bitch! He can’t fucking just insult my nickname for my husband! If I ever see him-” Katsuki growled.

“Focus, Kacchan!” Izuku patted his arm sympathetically. “Babycakes is a cute nickname. We need to get out of here.”

Katsuki took a moment to compose himself, still clearly pissed off with his alternate self, but nodded in agreement. “Yeah. Right, okay. Lets-”

The doorknob rattled then. There was a commotion outside. Both men froze as voices called out to each other. Izuku felt the blood drain from his face as he heard them talking about him. The other Izuku had been found. He was busted.