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Floating Feelings

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“Lena, you should just stay over,” Kara offered as she put away the nearly empty bottle of cab on her wine rack. 

 

The rack had been a new buy for the sunny reporter. Although she wasn’t an avid wine drinker, her best friend in the world was, and that was ample reason enough to make the purchase. Now, Kara had a place to put all the bottles Lena always felt required to bring with her when she came over for game or movie nights. She remembered telling Lena it wasn’t necessary, but the posh woman had been adamant in telling her that it was the very least she could do, and while Kara could care less about the wine, her sister was all for it. 

 

“I’m fiiiiiine,” Lena dragged out the word and let out a small giggle at the end. “I don’t even drive.”

 

Kara gave her an uneasy smile and watched as the brunette rose off the couch and attempted to walk to the kitchen. Unfortunately, Lena’s center of gravity was not fine and Kara found herself rushing ahead to keep Lena from falling over. 

 

“You are not fine,” Kara huffed as she steadied Lena in her arms.

 

Lena stood silent for a moment and then ran one hand up Kara’s arm, stopping only to squeeze on her bicep.

 

“Wow…” Lena said as she ran her other hand to affirm that both of Kara’s arms were made of steel. “You could crush me with these.”

 

Kara tried her best to remember that drunk Lena was always a bit more tactile than sober Lena and that she often said strange things. 

 

“I..I w, would never,” Kara faltered in her speech and ignored how good it felt to have Lena’s hands roaming from her shoulders to her biceps. “So you’ll stay… right?” The quickest way to disarm drunk Lena was to get her to sleep.

 

“Well…” Lena smirked and Kara saw a playful glint in her emerald gaze, “who could say no to these arms?”

 

Kara blushed and quickly scooped up the teasing brunette in her arms. Lena let out a small yelp but smiled wide up at Kara as she carried her to the bed.

 

“Why, Miss Danvers is this how you treat all your women?” Lena slurred as she wove her hands behind Kara’s neck. 

 

“Just you,” Kara murmured as her skin tingled wherever Lena touched and the scent of her hair wafted gently under Kara’s nose. 

 

At this Lena grew gravely silent and for a second Kara thought she had said something wrong. When she looked at Lena, her eyes were wide and full of unbridled astonishment. Kara thought she might be about to cry, the way her eyes gleamed wet, but instead she wore a fragile smile and tucked her head underneath Kara’s chin. Gently, Kara laid Lena down on the bed and brushed a few loose strands of hair from her brow before pulling back and sitting on the edge of the bed. 

 

“I’m going to get you some clothes okay?”

 

Lena nodded lazily and snuggled into Kara’s pillow. She absolutely loved how Kara’s scent wrapped around her and lulled her into a state of calm. When Kara came back, she gently tugged on Lena’s shoulder to get her to sit up and pulled her shirt off over her shoulders. The blonde tried with all her might not to stare at the way Lena’s creamy, alabaster skin contrasted with her black lace bra, or how that same bra pushed her breasts to show off their suppleness. 

 

Lena shivered when Kara’s warm fingers brushed her abdomen, but before she could register that she was semi-naked, Kara had already pulled one of her t-shirts over her. Kara took a deep breath as she held her pajama pants in one hand and looked ahead to her next challenge—taking off Lena’s pants.

 

“Alright Lee ummmm, your pants are kinda tight, so I’m just gonna…” Kara gulped as Lena just made some nonsense murmur in response. With hesitation, Kara pulled Lena’s zipper down and hooked her thumbs under the top edges of her pants. 

 

Lena whimpered at the contact and squirmed as Kara tried to successfully peel the pants down her thighs. Kara inwardly cursed herself for feeling warmth pool at the pit of her abdomen at Lena’s continuous mewls. She shouldn’t be having these reactions towards her best friend, especially since said friend had devoured a copious amount of wine and trusted Kara to take care of her. She reveled at how soft Lena’s inner thighs felt as she continued to roll down Lena’s pants and shook her head slightly at the dizzy feeling that took over. 

 

Once the pants had finally been removed, Kara took a second to marvel at how beautiful Lena looked in one of her t-shirts and the lacy underwear that matched her bra—she was perfect. The blonde swallowed hard and quickly made to put her pajama pants on the sleepy brunette. She got as far as her ankle before Lena grumbled “no pants” and kicked the offending article of clothing away. Kara tried again but Lena was resolute in her decision to not wear pants.

 

“Okay, okay no pants, sheesh,” Kara sighed and threw the pants back at her drawers. 

 

Lena hummed with a smile and murmured “thanks” as she slipped slowly into her dreams. 

 

“Goodnight Lena, sweet dreams” Kara whispered as she slipped in beside the sleeping beauty and fell into a deep sleep. 

 

Late into the night, Lena roused. She blinked open her sleepy eyes and shivered slightly—her legs were exposed and the blanket… she glanced to the side and found that the blanket had been pulled. At first, Lena thought she might be stuck in a dream. Her best friend was sleeping next to her; her best friend who 

also happened to be the woman she secretly pined for day in and day out. And not only was Lena in her bed, but Kara was… floating? Ok, Lena thought, there could be various explanations for Kara’s ability to float almost a foot above the mattress while sleeping… it didn’t necessarily mean what she thought it meant. She sat up slowly and looked at the floating Kara who was laying stiff as a board on her back, her blonde tresses cascaded down, her glasses on her nightstand and her face in a serene state.

 

‘Fuck,’ Lena thought; Kara was without a doubt the girl of steel that National City treasured above all else. She was in bed with a Super. 

 

The thought scared her and she felt the need to bolt and tell her driver to pick her up, but when she looked down she saw that she was wearing one of Kara’s large college t-shirts. Fuzzy memories of the blonde dressing her played in her mind and kept her anchored to the bed. Kara had taken care of her even when she acted out of line… even when her liquid courage let her unabashedly flirt with her best friend… her best friend who she secretly loved. Her blush overtook her when she took note that she was also not wearing any pants. 

 

The emotions swirling in her heart made going back to sleep nearly impossible. She couldn’t believe how ridiculous her circumstances were. She was in love with Kara; she was in love with Supergirl—her heart might explode from the parallel. Kara had always been the epitome of all that was good in Lena Luthor’s world; she had been the embodiment of sunshine and blue skies. How was earth’s softest girl also earth’s girl of steel? 

 

Maybe, thought Lena, it doesn’t have to be real. She pressed down on Kara’s abdomen and shoulder and was relieved that she went down easily. However when she lifted her hands, Kara began to float again. She pressed down again and this time she threw her leg over Kara. The blonde murmured but roused no further. Lena sighed, she would be her weight, for now. For now she’d just be wrapped around Kara and there would be no floating. The weight of her feelings, the gravity or lack thereof of Kara’s truth, would fade into the background until they faced it all together. At least that’s what Lena hoped as she held her hero down. 

As she nestled into Kara’s side, Lena agreed that tonight she had just unconsciously rolled over and accidentally found herself cuddling Kara. And Kara… she was just Kara. 

 

However, it kept happening. Except now she was staying over because they had planned sleepovers. As much as it pained her to admit that having sleep overs in her mid-twenties wasn’t exactly normal, she pinned it on the fact that Kara Danvers hadn’t had a normal childhood to begin with. Kara’s secret would bubble up ever so often, enough so that Lena wondered if she should just tell the poor girl that she knew. She had already cycled through various emotions considering the fact that Kara hadn’t confessed her secret identity; at first she was a bit peeved because it was rather obvious how bad of a liar Kara was, and how enamored she must have been to not realize it sooner. Then she was humored and warmed at the lengths Kara went to protect her in and out of uniform. Other days she was sick to her stomach because Kara would disappear and Supergirl would too. So whenever Kara offered to do a movie night, sleepover combo, she said yes without checking her schedule.

 

She wanted to confess to Kara each night, but they had fallen into a routine of sorts. They’d watch a movie, eat some take out, drink a bit of wine, all while practically tangled on the couch. It had happened gradually. Kara had always sat close to her since the very beginning, but only when they had put a horror movie on did she really back into Lena’s personal bubble. She wanted to tease Kara about being afraid of a ghost movie (she was the Girl of Steel, after all), but the whimpering blonde was too cute and Lena was more than willing to hold her during the jump scares. After awhile it just became the norm for Kara to cuddle into Lena’s side. Eventually, they became so comfortable with each other that they moved towards a more compromising position. Lena would sit at the end of the couch, one leg hanging off the edge, and Kara would find her spot  leaning back against her. Lena had raised a brow the first time Kara had situated herself so intimately between her legs, and Kara had said, “what? It’s easier to share popcorn this way”. Lena wasn’t one to argue, at least, not with Kara. 

 

One time Kara had fallen asleep and had turned so that she was resting her head on Lena’s chest, softly snoring. The Luthor caressed her hair and knew that the blonde had a rough day; she had watched the news in the morning. She saw Kara taking on a troupe of organized crime members, both alien and human, and Lena had clenched her fist every time one of them managed to land a hit on her kryptonian. She expected the blonde to call her and cancel their plans, but to her surprise Kara texted her to remind her to bring potstickers. She had brought extra. That night, Kara didn’t float; Lena imagined it was because she was too exhausted. 

 

Tonight, they were spending time at her loft; Lena had turned her bedroom into a stargazing amphitheatre and Kara was obsessed. Together they huddled under her covers and watched as the display came alive. It was endearing to listen to Kara ramble about different star systems that she had ‘read about in some book’ (Lena knew no such book existed) and zoomed to different quadrants when Kara asked. 

 

“It would be nice to see those places,” Kara murmured in the dark, her head gently pressed to Lena’s as they sat side by side.

 

‘Again.’ Thought Lena as she laced her hand with Kara’s. She couldn’t imagine what it must be like to be confined to Earth when she had been part of a space-faring civilization… regardless if it was through obligation or limitations. She didn’t dare imagine what it might feel like to lose your whole planet and family to utter chaos and destruction. 

 

“I could build you a spaceship,” Lena spoke up.

 

“Really?” Kara’s voice was filled with genuine hope and curiosity. 

 

Lena nodded, “yeah, really. Kara Danvers, first space-faring journalist… has a nice ring to it.” 

 

“You… you would come with me, right?” Kara asked, her voice smaller than before.

 

Lena smiled, “of course; I’m an excellent pilot.”

 

Kara hummed and gave her hand a little squeeze. They sat in content silence as the display took them on a journey through the universe. Lena had made this solely for Kara’s benefit, but hoped it would do well on the market as well. She wanted people to wonder about the unknown, to marvel at life outside of their planet, but more than anything, she wanted her alien to feel connected. Kara had lost so much, yet she was here, smiling, donning a superhero alter ego and saving the day. She continued to give so much of herself to a world that wasn’t always kind to her; Lena constantly marveled at Kara’s innate goodness. She gave her hope in her darkest moments. 

 

“Lena…” Kara whispered.

 

“Yeah?” Lena responded. 

 

“I love… this,” Kara said vaguely as she glanced at Lena and then back at the stars. “This is going to sound kind of whiny, but… I haven’t felt like I belonged anywhere in a long time. When the Danvers adopted me, it wasn’t until I connected with Alex that I really felt like I had a place, but… well we both have jobs, she started dating and we’re both super busy. I started feeling alone again… like I didn’t belong, but then I found you.” Kara smiled and nuzzled into Lena. “I know you weren’t keen on connecting with me… do you remember how you rejected my first game night offer?”

 

Lena sighed, “yeah, those were my Luthor genes shining at their brightest.” 

 

“But then you shared a whole order of appetizers when Alex bailed on me because of work,” Kara countered. “I was feeling so alone then. I had kind of accepted that you didn’t want to be my friend, and everyone seemed too busy to pay me any mind, so your offer was… perfect. Now… I can’t imagine my life without you in it.” 

 

“Neither can I,” Lena admitted; her heart beating fast at Kara’s heartfelt confession. “I’ve always felt like I had to keep my guard up. I’ve been hurt too many times for me to casually connect with anybody, but you’re worth the risk. You’ve always been there for me when I was sure everyone had abandoned me. I want to be the same for you.”

 

“You’re the best, Lena Luthor.” Kara said and pulled Lena in closer to her. 

 

“Said no one ever,” Lena teased but relished the firm hug Kara pulled her into. 

 

Kara had spent the rest of the night tucked under her chin and telling her stories of aliens she had interviewed for an article she was working on. Eventually they fell into an easy sleep, Kara snuggly pressed against her side. It didn’t make her quite as nervous as the first few times it had happened; her heart still beat fast but she felt more relaxed. Unlike every other experience Lena had with people she shared a bed with, being with Kara was about more than carnal desire. Knowing Kara was okay, softly snoring into the crevice of her neck, made Lena happy and assured that her Kryptonian was safe.  

 

Lena awoke when a slight shiver ran down her leg; the covers were somehow not on her and Kara’s warmth was missing. Begrudgingly she opened her eyes and allowed them to adjust to the darkness. Once they did, her breath caught in her chest at the sight of Kara hovering above her only slightly, face towards her and her bun close to unraveling. Kara was causing the blanket to pull up with her, leaving Lena exposed to the chilly refrigerated air. She chuckled silently and began to pull Kara down. Her bun grew slack and her blonde tresses spilled over her shoulder and tickled Lena’s face.

 

Lena couldn’t help but sputter at all the hair suddenly thrown in her face. 

 

“Oh Rao!” 

 

Kara ungraciously lowered herself and Lena grunted at the sudden impact.

 

“Lena! I’m so sorry,” Kara mumbled groggily as she rolled over and leaned to check if Lena was ok. “I… I can explain…” 

 

Lena regained her breath and glanced at Kara only to find anxious, blue eyes looking at her. 

 

“Kara, it’s ok. I know.” 

 

“You know?” Kara asked and Lena could hear the fear in her voice. 

 

Lena nodded and placed her hand gently on Kara’s cheek. “It’s ok…” she whispered as she caressed her cheek. 

 

“But Lena, I…” Kara’s voice caught in her throat as her eyes watered. “I’ve been lying to you.” 

 

“Hey, it’s ok, I understand. I’ve known for awhile now. I wanted to tell you sooner, but I thought you would tell me whenever you were ready.”

 

“So...so you knew this whole time? That I’m---”

 

“Supergirl.”

“--in love with you.”  

 

“What?” Both raised their voices, wide eyed and completely on different pages. 

 

“You’re in love with me?”

“You know I’m Supergirl?” 

 

Lena’s hand stilled but remained on Kara’s cheek. Kara slowly took Lena’s hand off her cheek and into her own. 

 

“I wanted to tell you that too… both of those confessions kept getting in the way of each other, and the timing always felt off, and now you probably think I’m making up excuses.” Kara gulped and tucked her hair behind her ear with her free hand, “so… you didn’t know I was in love with you?”

 

Lena took a moment before she shook her head. “I… just thought you really appreciated me, especially since you’ve lost so much.”

 

“This is so embarrassing,” Kara sighed. “I should leave.” 

 

Kara shuffled to get off the bed, and almost did, but Lena’s arms wrapped around her torso from behind. 

 

“Don’t go,” Lena whispered softly into the back of Kara’s neck, “please stay.” She held as tightly as she could and hoped Kara would heed her pleads. 

 

“But I abused your friendship,” Kara’s murmur was laced with shame.

 

Lena pulled Kara back and pushed her down on her pillows. She knew, logically, Kara couldn’t be pushed or pulled by her human strength; she knew Kara was allowing herself to be moved; she also knew that Kara’s heart was as fragile as hers. She hovered above Kara for a moment, searching her blue eyes for hesitancy, but only found a warm curiosity. Slowly she pressed her lips to Kara’s and gently savored how soft and full her lips were. She drew back only to press her lips again, gently, slowly over Kara’s. She wanted Kara to know her heart was safe with her; that she’d be gentle even if she was the Girl of Steel. 

 

“I love you too, Kara.” Lena said as she pulled away from the kiss. “You in no way took advantage of me, I promise. I didn’t know you could love me.”

 

Kara surged up, carefully placing her hand behind Lena’s neck and pulled her in for a more feverous kiss. Their chests were flushed as Kara deepened the kiss, carefully pulling Lena’s bottom lip between her own and slid her tongue to part her lips. Lena had had many kisses, but this… was pure bliss. She had gone from leaning over Kara, to full on straddling her. Before she could lose herself further to sensory overload, Kara pulled back and kissed her forehead. 

 

“You are very loveable Lena Luthor.” Kara said as she recovered her senses. “Since the day I met you, I knew that you’d be special to me. No one’s ever looked at me the way you do.”

 

“Oh, do tell,” Lena urged her on with a raised brow and smile. 

 

“Like everyone looks at Supergirl. You look at me in a way that makes me believe I can do anything. You remind me of...” Kara’s expression dampened and her gaze shifted downwards. Lena lifted Kara’s chin, leaned in and placed a soft kiss on Kara’s cheek. She wanted to know. “You remind me of home.”

 

“Oh, Kara,” Lena spoke softly as she wiped away a stray tear from Kara’s cheek. 

 

“On Krypton, I didn’t have powers,” Kara explained. “But I wasn’t invisible. I had a place and a family that loved me as I was. When I came to earth, and my powers manifested, I was told to hide my abilities… to act normal. But I didn’t know what normal was; I couldn’t talk to anyone about Krypton… my own cousin had been raised as a human, and nothing made sense for the longest time. Even when I became Supergirl, something still felt off… until I met you.” Kara smiled and let out a wet chuckle. “I can talk to you about anything.” 

 

“I’m going to admit something to you, but you have to promise not to laugh,” Lena said in a mock stern tone. 

 

Kara giggled but nodded. 

 

“I’ve thought of you as… my Kryptonian since figuring out you were Supergirl. It’s why I made the universe display… I can’t fathom the extent of your loss, but I know what it feels like to not belong. I want you to know,  Kara, that you will always belong with me, and I would really love to learn all about your planet and your culture.”

 

“Rao… I didn’t know I could fall more in love with you.” Kara thought aloud and then blushed. “By the way… when did you figure it out?” 

 

“That you’re Supergirl?” Lena smirked. “You float in your sleep sometimes. I would push you down and hold you so you wouldn’t. I wasn’t ready to accept the truth that you were Supergirl and that I loved you as more than a friend, so it seemed easier to just pretend that I had rolled over and snuggled into you.”

 

Kara hummed and pecked Lena’s nose. “If I’m your Kryptonian, then does that make you my human?” 

 

“I’d like that,” Lena mused with a shy smile.

 

Kara yawned and pulled Lena down to tuck her under her chin. 

 

In a sleepy tone she mumbled, “and when you make that ship,  I’ll make you my space wife.”