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Day #22 - Muddy

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The day after they'd taken things to the next level, when Nick had got Kelly off and they had had one of the most blinding kisses of his life, Nick woke early. He stared at the ceiling of the cabin that he had looked at many times before in his past, wondering just what it was he had done.

Were a few minutes of pleasure worth muddying the waters of twenty years of friendship? Were a few minutes of pleasure worth knowing that if he fucked this up, he would lose one of the best things in his life? Were a few minutes of pleasure worth causing Kelly to get confused about his sexuality? Were a few minutes of pleasure worth the thoughts swirling around in his head that he could already tell would be there for a good long while to come? Were a few minutes of pleasure worth it at all?

Eventually he got up, knowing the thoughts he was having, whilst valid, were not doing him any favours. He found cleaning supplies under the sink in the kitchen, and he busied himself cleaning as much of the cabin as he could whilst Kelly slept, trying to push aside his thoughts. Once he had done all of that, he left the cabin to go for a walk, trying desperately to clear his head, which was screaming at him that this was all wrong and that he had ruined one of the best things in his life on a whim.

~~~

Kelly felt Nick leave the bed and knew that he had been awake thinking for at least an hour, because he had been thinking too.

He knew that Nick would have been thinking about all of the ways this was bad, all of the ways this could go wrong, all of the ways that he had apparently taken advantage of him. He would need to get through to Nick before those ideas fully took root, because Nick could talk himself out of this for the greater good, even if that good was a detriment to his own happiness and wellbeing. Nicholas O'Flaherty would back away and carry on hating himself rather than run towards something that may be good for him.

Kelly vowed to make sure that Nick saw the good in this, saw that they had started something, could start something here.

This could be the best damn thing that ever happened to them.