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Nanny Poppins

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The first time Warlock Dowling watched Mary Poppins with his Nanny Ashtoreth he was five years old. Coincidentally, it was also the first time he had ever watched the movie at all. It had been raining that day, and their scheduled trip to the park with Brother Francis had to be cancelled. The boy was devastated that he couldn’t run around pretending to be a plane and other games he usually invented at the park. However, as most kids would usually throw tantrums at this point, Warlock did not. He was sad, but he knew better than to start misbehaving, after all, Nanny didn’t like when he misbehaved and would often warn him about not giving him dessert that day if he did. (Which she never followed through the threats. He always had dessert when Nanny was around.)

The thing was, he was used to the adults getting mad at him for throwing too many tantrums, even though in reality, they were meltdowns. However, Nanny would -unlike his parents- help him when he was having one of his meltdowns. She knew they were not tantrums and were just a product of sensory overload. If they were out where there were too many lights or noises, she would immediately get him away from the situation and even got him a mini pair of her sunglasses for him after one infamous occasion where it had gotten a bit too much for him to handle.

Back to the point, he didn’t cry. What he did do was to nod as Nanny explained they couldn’t go out and then he asked to go to his room. He was sad and wanted to cry but he didn’t want to appear as if he was about to throw a tantrum, he knew his parents did not like that one bit.

Nanny Ashtoreth let him go to his room and walked away. Warlock congratulated himself on being such a good boy for not crying in front of adults and then proceeded to cry in the solace of his room.

A few minutes later, Nanny knocked on his room and waited for a tiny voice to answer her to walk in. She was holding a stack of movies in her hands and had changed into a more indoor attire. She had taken her hat off she previously had and no longer had her coat on. She was wearing a Victorian-like wine dress and some flat shoes, holding her snake umbrella in the other hand.

She walked in with a smile and sat next to Warlock as she put the stack of movies in front of them both. Then, she saw Warlock tear-stained eyes and frowned.

“Tell me, Warlock, why is it that you have been crying?” She said softly, concern was visible in her eyes yet hidden under her dark sunglasses.

“N’thing, Nanny” he sniffled and cleaned the snot he had falling down his nose with the sleeve of his sweater.

“Now, my dear, what have we said about lying?” She raised an eyebrow.

“That lying is expected and encouraged, just never to Nanny.” He recited.

“Exactly, you do not ever lie to me. I can smell a lie miles away. You simply cannot lie to me.”

“For now.” Warlock mumbled.

Nanny Ashtoreth gaped. “What was that?”

“Uh, if I lie to others… then I can get good at it. And if I get really good, I can create a giant lie so you would not know!” He said with a cheeky grin at the end.

“Oh really?” If there was a ghost of a smile in Nanny’s surprised face, she would never admit to it and probably smack you with her umbrella for saying such a thing. “Anyway, Warlock, dear, I brought a few movies I thought you could watch. It’s not a day at the park but it will do.”

Warlock’s face lit up at it. “Yes! I love movies!”

“Which one do you want to watch? The Adams family, Coraline, Monster House, Hocus Pocus, or Mary Poppins.”

Warlock stared at the movies in front of him. Monster house sounded scary, and Coraline had buttons in her eyes, he did not like that. However, he stared at the last movie in front of him. “What’s a Mary Poppins?”

“Oh, it is about a family who gets a new Nanny-”

Nanny wasn’t able to finish her sentence; Warlock had interrupted with a happy nod. “Yes! That one!”

“Alright.” Nanny walked up to put the movie on and as it started, she began to leave.

“Nanny Ashtoreth?”

“Yes?”

“Can you watch it with me?”

“Of course.” Nanny smiled and walked over to Warlock, sitting next to him and before she knew it Warlock had moved so he was on top of Nanny’s arm and was resting his little head on her chest as he watched the movie.

They spent the rest of the movie like that. Ashtoreth was glad she had her sunglasses so she could take a nap. After all, ever since taking the job of Nanny, her sleeping hours had been reduced to almost non-existent. She was a demon and supposedly did not need sleep, but she was one terrible demon and so she had taught her body to need sleep.

She was woken up halfway through the movie when Warlock started giggling and smiling. “What is so funny, little hell spawn?”

“I knew it looked familiar!” He giggled again.

“Excuse me?” Nanny was a tad lost on what was happening. She began to think maybe taking a nap wasn’t her brightest idea.

He wiggled his way to Nanny’s ear to tell her a secret. “My nanny is Mary Poppins.” He whispered then wiggled back to his spot. “Don’t worry, I won’t tell.”

______________

After that, whenever it rained on an inconvenient day, it became like a routine for them to watch it together. Sometimes, the gardener would join after Warlock demanded they both watched it with him. He would always enjoy it way more than usual because Nanny and the gardener would occasionally share some glances between them as if that alone was a perfectly full formed conversation and they would smile. Warlock loved it.

_____

When Warlock was six and a half, he came down with a terrible flu. He had to stay in bed for a few days and wasn’t even allowed to wander around the house because he would ‘get someone else sick and then it would rather unpleasant’ at least, that's what his mother had said.

Only his nanny was allowed to enter his room, since that was her job. She was excluded from socialising with the rest of the staff, by the boss’ orders, in order to not get them sick, in case she got the flu from Warlock. Warlock felt bad for Nanny, but what he didn’t know was that Ashtoreth was more than thrilled for being able to have extra time for herself.

Now that she didn’t have to be with the staff, meaning a mandatory dinner together twice a week, (Which she despised), she would use that time to dine with the gardener in his small house he had next to Dowling's mansion. Warlock was not supposed to know where she went but she had taught him to sneak and eavesdrop quite well.

During his fourth sick day, Warlock was losing his mind having to be in his room all the time. He still felt sick, but he wanted to go outside, nonetheless. It was a perfect day, there was enough wind it was breezy but not cold, and the sun was shining making everything warm but there were a few clouds in sight giving shade from the full intensity of the sun.

He had tried everything to convince Nanny Ashtoreth to let him go out and play. He tried convincing her by using the manipulation skills she taught him, begging her to let him play outside and he would not tell a soul, not even Brother Francis. Which Warlock enjoyed talking to as much as Nanny. He even tried to blackmail her as she had taught him.

It had taken some time to teach him manipulation by knowing how the other person was thinking. This was because Warlock was having a hard time being able to decipher the tones and expressions the adults always used. But Nanny found the perfect way to teach him how and told him how to memorise what each expression on someone’s face usually meant.

She was impressed by how well the little hell spawn was learning everything she told him. But she still did not bulge, he was not going outside today. Warlock sniffed and hopped into the covers, covering up till his neck with blankets, pouting.

“We cannot go outside, however, we could watch a movie if you would like.”

Warlock took the blankets off him and sat up. “What movie?” He questioned.

“Whatever you like, my dear hell spawn.” She smiled.

“Uh…... could we watch Mary Poppins? I know it’s not raining but-”

“Of course.” She said softly and went to put in the movie. Then, she returned to sit next to Warlock.

“I love watching this with you, Nanny. It’s like having two Nanny Ashtoreths! Except you are the better one.”

“Obviously, I’m much cooler than Mary Poppins.” She said with a shrug. The smile she had on her face for the rest of the day had absolutely nothing to do with that comment. Not one single bit.

________

Warlock was crying. He didn’t even care if the adults thought it was a tantrum. In his defence, it wasn’t like he could stop crying, he was really sad.

His seventh birthday had just passed, and his mother had promised him she would take him to the dinosaur themed park. He had a growing interest in dinosaurs ever since Brother Francis had gifted him a dinosaur book a few months ago. He had told Nanny all about dinosaurs, which were herbivores, omnivores or carnivores. Nanny had listened to every word he said, he could feel it. She was even amused by the whole idea of it, which Warlock found extremely encouraging to continue rambling about it.

He had told Brother Francis about it too, after all, he was the one who gave the boy the book in the first place. So, Warlock would often ask Nanny to go to the garden with him in order to tell both her and Brother Francis about the new thing he had learned that day.

The last time he was out in the garden, he had told them about how his mother was taking him to the dinosaur themed park. Only the two of them for a day out. Warlock had been rather excited and was flapping his hands and jumping excitedly as he told the fantastic news.

However, the day Harriet was supposed to take Warlock to the dinosaur themed park. She, well, she forgot and had made plans to dine out with one of her friends, the wife of another ambassador. She was wearing a long fancy blue skirt and a matching, very expensive, blouse, high heels and a nice matching hat.

She had been walking towards the kitchen to get some breakfast before going out when a very excited Warlock, dressed in his dinosaur shirt a nice pair of jeans and dinosaur shoes, ran up to her.

Warlock’s grin did not falter. He saw his mom was wearing something too fancy for the park, but he thought it was on purpose. “Ready mommy?”

Harriet made an ‘oh shit’ face. “Oh, Warlock, I’m afraid I have this very important meeting, I’ll take you some other time.” she said not very sorry at all.

Warlock’s grin fell off his face. How was he so stupid to believe his mother would take him anywhere! He was seven years old and, in that time, she had taken him somewhere he wanted once, and with Nanny Ashtoreth to take care of him.

He ran to his room and began to cry.

Nanny Ashtoreth had watched the whole scene take place. She was furious with Harriet. She would later say it was because if Harriet was treating him like that he might come into his full powers before it was time and take the whole world with it, including her. She was not angry because she cared for the boy as her own. Not at all.

She walked to Warlock’s room and knocked on the door. She waited for an answer to let her come in but all there was is crying on the other side. She knocked again.

“Go away!!!” Warlock yelled.

“Is that a way to treat your favourite Nanny?” She said humorously.

“N-nanny! Co-me I-in.” He said between sobs.

Ashtoreth walked in and closed the door so that no one would witness what she was going to do. She walked towards the boy and hugged him, she didn’t say anything about him leaving snot on her shoulder and staining her favourite dress. “There, there. Don’t cry my little hellspawn, you will be able to crush them beneath your feet when the earth is destroyed.” She whispered.

Warlock continued crying. “S-she promised! How w-was I so st-stupid to believe her! She doe-do’snt even like me.”

“Her loss. She is missing on how powerful you are.” Nanny shrugged.

“You do, don’t you?” Warlock sniffed.

“Do I what, Dear?”

“Like me.”

“Of course I do.”

“Thank you, Nanny, you the best.” He had stopped crying a few seconds ago and hugged nanny again.

This was getting way to emotional for her comfort. “Do you want to watch a movie?”

Warlock nodded. “Which one?”

“What would you say to Mary Poppins?” She grinned.

Warlock had a grin that matched hers and nodded enthusiastically.

___________

He really messed it up. Big time. Warlock had no idea how he was going to tell his father he had probably broken a bone a day before a big family political event. He was sure it was broken, he felt it. Even though he hadn’t checked his injuries, the pain he felt on his arm was unbearable.

Everything happened so fast. He was playing in the garden and climbing trees despite Brother Francis warning him numerous times to be careful. He shrugged the warning off, he was already nine after all, he already was a big boy. He climbed a tree and was moving higher and higher, reaching branch after branch, when his foot slipped, and he fell.

He let out a piercing scream as he fell and another, worse, scream after he landed on his arm. He hoped the gardener would hear him because he was certain Nanny wasn’t outside at this time and he definitely would not be able to stand up.

Brother Francis heard the scream even though he was all the way on the other side of the vast garden; he ran out, as much as he could possibly run and headed towards Warlock. However, before he was even halfway through, Nanny Ashtoreth was kneeling besides Warlock and assessing what happened.

“How did you get here so fast?” Warlock groaned as he tried to stand up. It had been less than a few seconds since he fell.

“Hush now, my little hellspawn.” Nanny said; she tried her best to not let the worry be detected in her voice. She saw Warlock’s arm and knew it was definitely broken. His bone was sticking out and his arm was twice the size it usually was. “Good news, nothing is broken. It took a bad hit but worst that will happen will be bruised.”

And miraculously, the boy’s hand was no longer broken, and the pain had become really bearable.

By that time, Brother Francis had already arrived at the scene and had witnessed the miracle a certain demon had performed. He looked at her with a glimpse of something in his eye, yet he knew better than to say anything.

Ashtoreth glared at the angel as a warning not to say anything.

“You alr’ght, Master Warlock?” The angel said instead.

“The boy is fine, you have nothing to worry about, Brother Francis.” She replied. She looked at the boy she was holding and helped him up. “Come on, dear, let’s get you cleaned up.”

Once cleaned up Warlock was laying in his bed with an ice pack on his arm. Nanny had made sure he hadn’t hurt his head or anything, which he didn’t and then sat next to him. “Listen to me carefully, little hell spawn. You do not get to go outside without me going with you, even if it’s too early for me to be officially working, you come to me before going off to play and breaking bones.”

“I didn’t break anything though.” Warlock replied.

“This time.” Nanny said. “But you have to be careful, you cannot rule the world if you die by climbing trees.”

“Sorry, Nanny. It won’t happen again.”

“It better not.” Nanny said seriously; she turned her head to look at the TV and then back at Warlock. “Movie?”

“Mary Poppins?” Warlock said full of hope.

“Thought you might ask.” Nanny said turning the TV on, with the movie already playing.

Warlock enjoyed this time as much as the first time he ever watched it. He knew he had said his Nanny was Mary Poppins but now he was certain of it. His Nanny might not be able to teleport him into other dimensions. But she did heal him from his fall. He didn’t know how, but what he did know was that he had certainly broken a bone, and Nanny had somehow cured it in seconds. He would never tell her that he knew her secret, it was safe with him.

_______

Warlock had just turned ten. It had been amazing, he celebrated it with a few friends he had. Well, when he said friends, he meant the kids of very important people to his dad. Anyway, that wasn’t why his birthday was amazing; during his party he had escaped from everyone and went to Brother Francis’ house who was at one end of the garden. It was small but cosy.

He had found Nanny Ashtoreth there, the two adults were having some nice cups of tea and were talking about something.

“We can’t! Zira, we have a year left, we can surely stay! We don’t have to leave do we?” Crowley said. He was talking more hissed and informal.

“Crowley, we have to leave. I know you care about the boy, and it’s sweet-” Aziraphale was cut off by Crowley.

“I’m not sweet! I’m a demon! I’m the opposite of sweet I’m-” Crowley’s eyes widened.

They hushed at the sight of Warlock and a pair of twin smiles appeared on both their faces.

“Master Warlock! Shouldn’t you be enjoying thy wonderful b’day party?” Brother Francis said with his usual smile.

“It was boring. I decided to come here instead. I was actually going to ask you, Brother Francis, to help me kidnap Nanny from her day off and run off to get wasted with ice cream.” Warlock shrugged. “But it seems Nanny beat me to it.”

Nanny smiled and agreed to steal some ice cream with them. She hoped Warlock had not listened to much of her conversation with her angel.

They spent the rest of the day at Brother’s Francis’ house eating an unhealthy amount of really expensive ice cream which miraculously never melted even though it was under the sun for hours.

At night, Ashtoreth gave a quick nod to Brother Francis as a way of saying goodbye and took Warlock back to the Mansion.

As Nanny was tucking Warlock into bed, he took her hand softly so she wouldn’t leave. “Are you going to leave?” He whimpered.

“You heard.” It wasn’t a question. Her face softened and she sat on his bed next to him. “I think I will. You are already such a big boy, ready to take over the world.”

“But Nanny, I’m not a big boy yet! You can’t leave! I still need you.” He wept. “Why do you have to leave.”

Nanny was quiet for a minute. “You remember Mary Poppins?”

Warlock frowned in utter confusion. “What kind of question is that? Of course, I know it. We watch it when I’m feeling sad, and I can recite it by memory now.”

“Well, you see, my little hellspawn, just like Mary Poppins, I need to go take care of another child like you. You’re a big boy now, your mother and father will take care of the rest.”

“I’m going to miss you.” Warlock’s eyes started to get extremely teary. “But I’m still your favourite, right?”

You are like my own, of course you are my favourite . “Obviously, you’re my little hellspawn”

Warlock sniffed and nodded at the answer. Then he sat up and hugged his Nanny with all his strength. He closed his eyes remembering her smell and her heartbeat.

“Just remember what I told you, okay?”

“That I am destined to rule the universe and all who live in it?” Warlock asked, looking at her with big, wide, tear-stained eyes.

Nanny smiled sadly and kissed the top of Warlock’s head. “Exactly, I’ll miss you so much. I wish you well.” She stood up to leave before she started to cry too.

She was a demon, and she was not going to cry. You are a demon; you are incapable of love. Do not fucking cry you useless demon. She mentally scolded herself.

“Nanny?” Warlock asked in the tiniest voice.

“Hmm?” Nanny said, not trusting herself to speak yet.

“I don’t want my birthday to end yet. Can we watch a movie?”

“Of course, dear hell spawn.” She paused. “Mary Poppins?”

“You know it!”

_______

The next day when Nanny handed in her resignation letter, Warlock tried his best not to cry and be a big boy. But as her car was leaving the residence he started running after the car yelling for it to stop because he wanted his Nanny back.

The guards had to hold him down so he wouldn’t run off the property. Unlucky for Warlock, the car was already too far away to see what had happened.

The gardener handed in his resignation letter a week later.

________

It had been a really bad day for Warlock. His father had come back from another of his work trips and had spent most of the day yelling at the staff, as he usually did when he was around. And on some occasions, yell at Warlock too. On the other hand, Warlock’s mother, Harriet, had spent the whole day pestering him about his upcoming eleventh birthday party while they had visited a dinosaur park, which he now found dumb. There was a time he loved dinosaurs but after his Nanny left and everyone told him dinosaurs were boring, and he was annoying them, he began to find dinosaurs dumb.

He used to always look forward to turning eleven, he didn’t know why, but ever since he could remember, turning that specific age was like something of a milestone, and a big one at that. Warlock, for some reason, had been led to believe by his Nanny that eleven was the most important age of all. This might be because he spent nearly all his childhood listening to stories about how he was going to rule the world when it was destroyed, and how he was going to make his enemies pay when he came into his full power; whatever that meant. Which had led him to believe through his entire childhood that when he turned eleven, he was finally going to rule the world.

Of course, now that he was turning eleven, he knew that it was stupid to believe in stories he was told as a child (even though less than a year ago he had believed that to be true), no matter how odd they had been. And to be fair, he really wasn’t in the mood to celebrate his birthday without his Nanny. As it was going to be his first birthday without her and his favourite gardener. These two had left within a week after Warlock’s tenth birthday, it was not a day he wished to remember, but he did.

Warlock was finally able to escape the pestering of his mother and fled to his room. No one here understood him anymore, not since his Nanny left. So, he decided the day she left, that he was going to be spending his time alone. It was better to be alone than with a shitty company, after all.

He locked his room and turned on the Telly, he switched the channels every few seconds trying to find something to watch. Fortunately, after a few minutes of switching channels he found the perfect movie to watch. More fortunate for him, it was just beginning.

When he saw what movie it was, he smiled. He felt a mixture of happiness and loneliness since this was the first time he saw the movie after his Nanny left. He hadn’t been able to watch it, not without her. He lay back in his bed with his multiple pillows and his snake plushie Nanny had given him when he turned seven and started watching Mary Poppins.

_________

+Bonus

Warlock had turned twenty-three two weeks ago. Everything seemed to be going downhill from there. He had gotten disowned the day of his birthday and had been trying to find out how to live on his own from that moment onwards.

He found a friend (an ex, but they stayed friends after) who let him stay at his house while he found a job. Riley had given Warlock his couch and food, he said he could stay with him as long as he didn’t make a mess of the place.

He was glad his friend’s house was in Soho, which meant it was far from the hell house he grew up in the last 12 years. He had lived there all his life, but the last 12 years had made it unbearable.

Ever since, Warlock had been trying to find a job, but no one called him. He wondered if he answered the interviews too literal, his Nanny used to say he took things too literal for interpretation. Anyways, no one had called him, and he didn’t know what to do.

Riley wasn’t home so Warlock was browsing the channels. There was nothing to see, but it passed the time. He watched the telly for about half an hour until his phone buzzed. He just received a message from his father, probably the last one he would receive, telling him that he had officially being removed from the family’s will and he should not be allowed to return home unless Warlock decided to change.

He knew the message was coming, but it still hurt him. He was never close to his parents, but it still hurt they would do this. It was too much to take, so he put on his jacket and decided to take a walk to the town.

To the town of Soho, the town he was not familiar with and had not been out by himself at all during the two weeks he had been staying there, the town where he most certainly was going to get lost.

He walked for hours without thinking about where he was going. He realised, until it was too late, that it was already night-time, and it had begun to rain. Warlock mentally cursed himself, he had no idea where he was, no money on him, and even if he did, he couldn’t take a cab home since he didn’t know Riley’s address. He walked hurriedly along the street looking for any restaurant or shop that was open, unfortunately, it was already too late, and the shops had been closed.

He walked for about fifteen more minutes under the rain until he found a bookshop. It was closed, although it was clear people were still inside it and the lights were on. He decided to try his luck and see if he could get in just until the rain had passed.

He pulled the door and surprisingly, it was open. He walked in, dripping wet and cold. He saw the bookshop was nice and cosy, it had many books and he could see there was a space near the middle of the store that had a big sunlight lamp and a nice flat stone with small pillows on it. He knew those lamps, those were made especially for snakes, and judging by the type of lamp and size of the rock, it was for a snake of at least six feet. He would really love to see a snake like that, every snake reminded him of his good childhood memories, meaning, his nanny and his gardener.

His thoughts were interrupted by people bickering.

“I swore I locked the bookshop, angel. I checked twice!” An exasperated voice came from the back room.

“Well someone just entered, I can sense them standing in my store, and they cannot obviously read because the sign clearly says Closed.” Another voice said, sounding annoyed.

“I’ll shoo them away, angel. Just stop being angry at me.”

“I’m not angry at you, Crowley. I’m annoyed at the situation; we were having such a quite marvellous date night. And now the crepes will get cold and the sushi will get damp which I despise eating it like that.” One of the voices said, sounding as if they were in pure distress.

“Angel, you can always miracle them better, it’s not like we stopped using miracles when we got rid of our respective bosses.” The other voice said. “Now let me handle this.”

There were footsteps coming closer, until Warlock saw someone emerge from the back room. The man was wearing skinny black jeans, with a dark vest, a thing Warlock couldn’t name around his neck and a black jacket. He had a dark red hair and round black sunglasses.

Warlock gaped, the person in front of him reminded him too much of someone he used to know. He only ever knew one person with that shade of red hair and wearing sunglasses indoors and at night. He looked closer and saw that below of one of his temples he had a tattoo that looked so much like his “Nanny?” Warlock said before he could think of what he was saying.

Warlock visibly tensed up and widened his eyes. He had Not meant to say that out loud. Now the stranger would think he was a crazy man trying to break into the shop.

The other man visibly tensed up too for a second before relaxing and smiling. A smile Warlock had not seen in 12 years. “Hello, my dear hell spawn.”

It was his Nanny. Warlock was not going to stop and think about what was going on. He could do that later, right now he needed a hug from his Nanny who somehow was in front of him.

He received Warlock with opened arms and hugged him tight. Not saying anything else until Warlock broke the silence.

“How?” Warlock said in a soft tone, not trusting himself to say it above a whisper.

“I can explain everything. Would you want a cup of tea or coffee while I explain? Cause it is a big fuck up story.”

“Black, Five sugars.”

His Nanny went into the back room and brought three cups of coffee and set them down on a table that Warlock was certain it was not there before. Then, he sat on a couch that had definitely not been there before, Warlock decided to sit on the couch opposite from it so he could listen to the story.

A man with irregular blonde hair appeared behind Nanny. “Crowley? What the hell Is going on?”

“Aziraphale-” His nanny, Crowley, apparently, did some weird noises with his mouth and shrugged. “Ngk, our prodigal son has returned.”

Aziraphale did a dramatic head-turn and looked at Warlock then smiled brightly. “Master Warlock? Is that you?” He went and hugged him before he could answer.

Crowley sat down in one of the couches and patted next to him so Aziraphale sat next to him. “Right, the explanation.”

For the next few hours they explained everything. Not leaving one single detail behind. Well, not any important details at least.

Warlock was not surprised, it made sense. After growing up with what probably was the weirdest childhood, he learned to embrace absolute madness information. “So, you are an angel and you are a demon. You have been around for 6000 years and only after stopping the world did you two idiots finally got together. -Because let me be honest I thought you guys have been pining after each other from way back-” he said quickly so the two supernatural entities couldn’t say anything about it. He coughed the next sentence out. “Garden of Eden” he coughed again. “London blitz” he coughed again and then smiled. “You were also my gardener and nanny because you thought I was the antichrist, but I wasn’t because there was a mix-up of the babies and the real antichrist is with my real parents. And you stopped the apocalypse and dumped heaven and hell?”

“That’s pretty much it.” Aziraphale said.

“Yea that sums it up.” Crowley said at the same time.

“Alright.” Warlock said. “But you were my Nanny so-”

“I think I can sense what you are going to ask. Yes, I was your Nanny, and during that time I was a woman. I’m very flexible with genders; sometimes I’m a man, sometimes I’m a woman, sometimes I’m neither or both and sometimes I’m a snake.” Crowley explained.

Warlock smiled brightly at that. “That’s cool. You are using he/him pronouns right now?”

“Yesss.” Crowley confirmed. “Now that we have explained, do tell what has happened dear hell spawn.”

“Wh-what do you mean?”

“You were definitely crying before entering the shop, I can tell, I raised you. You were soaking wet and are wearing clothes that your father would think they are very informal for you.” Crowley said softly while frowning. “So, what happened.”

Warlock had only realised that he was not soaking wet anymore but was completely dry and warm. He didn’t know when that happened. “Well, I got disowned two week ago. I got kicked out of the house at that time and I’ve been staying with someone ever since ...today it was official… the disowning, so I decided to take a walk downtown where I knew nothing about. And then I lost track of time and uh, it was night. Before I knew it, I was standing in front of your store.

Aziraphale, who had been rather quiet lately, spoke. “Why would that disgusting father of yours ever even think of disowning you?” He said in a very judgmental tone.

Warlock looked down and started tapping his fingers together as he usually did when he was nervous. “Just like you, Crowley, I’m flexible with gender, kind of. Still looking for labels but I’m sometimes one, sometimes I’m like in between, kind of like nonbinary…. Father did not like that, or the fact that I kissed a boy on my birthday party.” He gulped and continued to look down.

Aziraphale and Crowley tensed up. Crowley did a sound that sounded like hissing and took off his sunglasses in rage. “I could kill him; I could kill him without having to break a sweat.” He hissed. “And he would certainly not like what he finds below.”

Warlock was touched that Crowley cared so much. He knew Crowley was not the killing type.

Aziraphale had a murder face on. Warlock could see it in his eyes and the twitch of his eyebrows and the curve of his mouth. “Now dear,” he told Crowley in the most relaxed yet distant and cold voice. “We don’t want to kill him. We could inconvenience him until he died, he will get what he deserves either way.”

“Thank you both, but it’s really not necessary. I’m good, I’m actually better now that I’m away from them.” He paused. “Think of it this way, If I hadn’t gotten disowned, I wouldn’t have met you guys again.”

“Fine, we won't kill him.” Crowley sneered.

“But that’s because we care about you more than we hate him.” Aziraphale added.

“Thank you, guys. Really.” He said as he hugged them. “I should probably get going, I interrupted date night, didn’t I?”

“Nonsense!” Both Crowley and Aziraphale said.

“Stay over, we have crepes and sushi for all.” Aziraphale said with the brightest smile which Warlock couldn’t refuse to.

“And we have movies. Wanna watch something?” Crowley grinned.

“Absolutely!” Warlock smiled. “What about, Mary Poppins?”

That night Warlock Dowling fell asleep with a smile on his face on the couch next to his two godfathers who loved him very much while watching his favourite movie in the world. For the first time in 12 years, he finally felt loved again.