Dusk comes sooner than expected.
Jaemin climbs up the ledge of the roof, watching the streets dwindle to a familiar shade of gray, wind howling, lost in the rhythm of his legs swinging back and forth.
He lets out an exasperated sigh.
"That was one hell of a sigh, unexpectedly from a young one but go on. Tough day?" Jaemin turns around to see a giggling Jaehyun, his most respected alpha and brother in the pack.
"Jaehyun hyung." He acknowledged the alpha with a curt nod and back to staring at the pale view in front of him. Jaehyun stands beside him silently, not wanting to pry or agitate the young alpha.
“I’ve thought about it before, you know? How I’m so good at pushing the people I love away. Jeno is mad at me, for the nth time this week." Jaemin starts off.
"What happened?" Jaehyun asks, eyes settling on the dejected figure beside him.
“That's the thing, I’m not exactly sure why. I don’t know what's wrong with me?”
"Don’t give me that crap, Jaem. Maybe that's the issue. You're using that as an excuse to evade whatever it is you're going through." Jaemin felt a needle prick his body. He knew deep inside Jaehyun was right. He was pretty much dodging the issue, the care.
"Jaemin, maybe he's mad because he thinks he's losing you." Jaehyun points out. Jaemin gives the older a questioning look.
“Everytime you dodge the problem, you add a wall between both of you and that’s what scares Jeno. You’re taking him for granted because you know he’s always there.” Jaemin swallows dry upon the call out.
“I just didn’t want to burden him with issues, I, for one, could not comprehend. I don’t even know where to start.”
Jaemin was never good at expressing himself to begin with. For him expressing is making himself vulnerable to people and being vulnerable to him, is weakness.
He never wanted weakness, especially in front of his dear omega.
“Then tell that to him. For once, can you stop letting your pride take over and talk to him? Just because Jeno is an omega, doesn’t mean he’s your subordinate. He is your mate and I think he deserves your honesty. Jeno always says he will but no one can wait forever. I mean, is it even worth waiting for you if he feels that he’s not even worth your trust?”
And the guilt strikes as fast as lightning for Jaemin. He was being unfair to Jeno, who was nothing but good to him. He thinks he doesn’t deserve him.
“Thanks for the ted talk hyung.” Jaemin heaves out a sigh, gazing into a distance.
“No problem kid, just please think before you speak. Use your words wisely.” Jaemin stretches before he gets up, nodding at every word the older alpha says.
He smiles, genuinely this time as he marches towards the exit.
He’s been thinking about a lot of things.
But maybe it’s time to stop overthinking and start talking.