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only for tonight

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the news channel buzzes on the televison while chanyeol waits for the water to boil for his instant ramen.  it's almost noon, but chanyeol's just woken up.  it's day one of a week long holiday and usually chanyeol's not one to pass up the chance to do all kinds of activities that he's wanted to do.  but today, he's feeling a little lazy.  no, if he's being honest, today chanyeol's feeling a little down.  if he's being super duper honest, he's feeling a lot frustrated.

yesterday night, he had gone out drinking with his friends.  of course minseok hyung had joined their group.  baekhyun had been draped over minseok hyung all night, but chanyeol had pretended not to mind.  it was weird that he did mind because, after all, minseok hyung wasn't chanyeol's.  no matter how much chanyeol wanted it, minseok hyung was just that - a hyung.  so he acted the part, like always.  he was a good dongsaeng and a good friend, who drank less the more everyone else drank.  baekhyun was a light weight and the first to go down.  jongdae was stronger; he knew his limits.  but it was the night before a week long vacation, so cautions were thrown to the wind and after three beers and a bottle of soju, jongdae was also out.  kyungsoo was always hard to tell.  up until the second soju bottle, chanyeol had no idea if kyungsoo was just tired or just that far gone.  but soon enough, kyungsoo's head was banging on the table and a light snoring had followed.  minseok hyung had erupted in little giggling fits at the sight of kyungsoo embarrassing himself.  and chanyeol had laughed along too, and if the sound was a little stiff, it was because chanyeol was simultaenously pinching his own thigh so he wouldn't cross the line.  it was all because minseok hyung was utterly adorable when he was tipsy.

minseok hyung's cheeks were already a flushed sort of pink.  his eyelids were just a little more droopier than usual and his pupils were dilated in the dim lighted pub.  he was slumping his posture like a semi-boneless creature, cheek propped on one hand and gazing up at chanyeol and smiling like a sleepy  and satisfied cat.  chanyeol had had two beers, but he almost felt he could get drunk off of the way minseok looked.


minseok's voice melts onto chanyeol's senses.

"our handsome yeol~!"

ah, that's right.  chanyeol had forgotten that minseok's cutie level went up when he was buzzed.  the aegyo level was increased when he was like this and his tongue was a little shorter than usual.  chanyeol jumps when minseok's two tiny hands lightly slap chanyeol's cheeks.  chanyeol feels his face get smushed between the two soft palms and chanyeol gulps.  minseok hyung's face is awfully close.

"our yeol-ee is so handsome" minseok coos as he strokes chanyeol's cheek.  "so tall", he continues with another stroke.  "and so kind~."

minseok's eyes fold like a fan into a beautiful curved shape as he grins.  chanyeol can't help that a sigh escapes from his throat.

"hyung, you're drunk" he states begrudgingly.  "let's get you home."

nevermind that all his other friends are passed out over on the table.  nevermind that chanyeol is the only one sober enough to coordinate rides for everyone.  chanyeol's main objective is to get minseok home so no one else could see the puddle of sunshine and cuteness that minseok hyung had melted into.  but when chanyeol's hoisting minseok up by gripping minseok under his arms, chanyeol feels something soft and tiny and slightly wet on his cheek.

chanyeol freezes.

"hee hee" comes minseok's voice.  "yeol-ee is so pretty~"

another little peck on the cheek brings chanyeol half way back and he gulps again.  his cheeks start to flame up and the words get stuck in his throat before coming out of his mouth.

"h-h-h-hyung, w-w-what..."


"yeol-ah, i really like you, you know?"



"i love our handsome yeol-ee~"



"does our yeol-ee love me too?"




and all at once, minseok hyung's face is only a few millimeters from chanyeol's and chanyeol is staring right into minseok's sleepy looking eyes, slowly blinking until-

minseok's lips are softer than chanyeol remembers as they move over his.  minseok hyung's lips are little wet from the water chanyeol had made him drink.  they slide over chanyeol's mouth and chanyeol's eyelids slowly close.  the plush feeling of minseok's lips multiplies a hundred fold and sends little sparks down chanyeol's neck and then his spine.  minseok's hands are on either side of chanyeol's face and his finger tips roam chanyeol's hair line.  chanyeol finds himself moving his lips as well, gently holding minseok's lower lip between his own and pressing into the warmness.  chanyeol's basking in the feeling of minseok gingerly fingering his ears when a little bit of minseok's tongue peeks out and tentatively touches chanyeol's upper lip.  that little lick sends jolts down chanyeol's torso and before he knows it, he's entering minseok's mouth with his own tongue.  he explores minseok's mouth like he's on a quest to seek a treasure.  he glides along the length of minseok's tongue and then lingers at each tiny tooth.  he tastes the upper part of minseok's palate and minseok whines a little because it's ticklish.

chanyeol doesn't know for how long the kiss lasts, but it seems like a lifetime and yet, only a split second at the same time.  it ends when minseok sighs into chanyeol's mouth and slumps into chanyeol's chest, fast asleep.





to the unknowing eye, last night's events should make chanyeol happy.  because everyone and their grandmother know about chanyeol's not-so-secret crush on minseok hyung.  but minseok is a creature of habit and chanyeol has always been an idiot when it comes to the tiny hyung.

in the morning, minseok had woken up in chanyeol's bed.  he'd walked out into the living room to find chanyeol sprawled on the floor.  when minseok had woken chanyeol up to announce he was leaving at eight in the morning, chanyeol had jumped up, frantically flattening his hair that had inevitably transformed into a bird's nest.

"it's okay to stay" chanyeol had said, trying not to sound like he was begging.  "we have a week's holiday, remember?"

minseok had smiled then, making chanyeol keep his mouth ajar like an idiot.

"i've caused you too much trouble already.  you settled the bill yesterday night, didn't you?  i'll pay you back later, ok?  thanks for letting me spend the night."


chanyeol's mind was racing, searching for words that would hold minseok there longer.  but minseok was already at the foyer, putting on his shoes.  chanyeol was thinking, maybe he should lend minseok a jacket because the morning air was cold.  but before chanyeol can open his mouth again, minseok had paused at the door.

"i... didn't do anything weird last night, did i?"

'does yeol-ee love me too?'

a flashback of last night ghosts his memory and just like that chanyeol's mouth goes dry.  it happens every time and yet, each time, the wound hurts just as much if not more.


chanyeol shakes his head, looking down at his feet.  he can hear minseok hyung sigh in relief.

"oh good" minseok says, running a hand down his own chest.  "i can't remember a thing after the third bottle.  anyway, bye chanyeol-ah!  see you later!"

minseok waves goodbye with such a sunny smile that chanyeol can't do anything but wave back.




after minseok had left, chanyeol had fallen back to sleep.  he had considered lying on his own bed, but had chosen to go back to the hard wood floor of the living room.  he was nursing a broken heart and being buried in a bed that smelled of minseok hyung seemed a little cruel at the time.  now, it was a little past noon and his ramen still wasn't done.  or was it?

chanyeol lifts the pot's lid and curses under his breath.  the noodles were waterlogged and the half the soup had evaporated.  he tosses the pot in its entirety in the sink.  he sighs, raking a hand through his hair.  he adjusts his glasses and looks at his watch.  his stomach protests at the smell of piping hot ramen, but it's already ruined.  he sits back down on the couch, wondering if he should get delivery or something.  he's too lazy to go out.  the sun is shining but he's feeling a little down.  no, the pain of his grumbling stomach isn't enough to mask the sizzling pain in his chest.

so chanyeol lies back on the couch, taking off his glasses so he can massage the bridge of his nose.  his phone buzzes on the coffee table.  it's a message from jongdae.

[are you up for another night of drinking? 
minseok hyung wants to go out again. 
i'll be the sober one this time. ^^]

a laugh like a sigh escapes chanyeol's lips.  maybe it's a vicious cycle because minseok's a creature of habit and chanyeol's a little dumb when it comes to his crush.  but even so, chanyeol gets up to take a shower.  a little bounce comes back to his step at the promise of sweet nothings from minseok.


"do you love me, yeol-ah?"

"hyung, i-"

"i love you, yeol-ah."



even if it's only for tonight.