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all this hope you sent into the sky

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part two: a movie script ending

and now we all know the words were true
in the sappiest songs, yes yes
i’ll put them to bed but they won’t sleep

rainraindownn: so, afi, huh?

twobrokenwingsx: Yeah. That’s actually how Aline dragged me into this whole thing.

rainraindownn: you say that like you didn’t come willingly. i’ve seen you in the mosh pit. you look pretty willing to me.

twobrokenwingsx: Well I wasn’t at first.
twobrokenwingsx: You haven’t seen me in the mosh pit.

rainraindownn: oh i have, alexander. but you’re telling me a story. why weren’t you willing?

twobrokenwingsx: There isn’t really a story. I’m sure you’ve noticed I just pretty much suck at social situations. But Aline played enough music I liked in the car that I agreed to go with her to a show.

rainraindownn: i don’t think you suck at social situations.

twobrokenwingsx: You don’t have to lie about that, I know I do. You know I do. I literally couldn’t even think of what to say when we first met.

rainraindownn: you thought i’d insulted you, that’s a totally different situation. you seem to do fine most of the time.
rainraindownn: most of the people at the hideaway like you.

twobrokenwingsx: Most of the people at the hideaway don’t know who I am.
twobrokenwingsx: And I’m fine with that.

rainraindownn: you underestimate yourself, i think.

twobrokenwingsx: ANYWAY, AFI.

rainraindownn: you’re gonna have to learn to take a compliment if you keep hanging out with me.
rainraindownn: but okay, we can change the subject.

twobrokenwingsx: And that’s when Jace fell off the fire escape he’d been hiding on to listen in on her conversation. He sprained his ankle and was a total pain about it for like 3 weeks.

rainraindownn: wait, who’s jace?

twobrokenwingsx: My brother.

rainraindownn: i thought your brother was max.

twobrokenwingsx: Jace is my other brother, he’s Izzy’s age.

rainraindownn: they’re twins?

twobrokenwingsx: Just the two.
twobrokenwingsx: Oh no, Jace is adopted.

rainraindownn: your house must be fun.

twobrokenwingsx: I can’t tell if that’s sarcastic or not.
twobrokenwingsx: But either way, the answer is yes, sometimes. But right now Jace is away at school so it’s slightly quieter. Only slightly.

rainraindownn: they sent the adopted kid to boarding school? harsh.

twobrokenwingsx: It’s not like that. Jace’s parents and my parents were friends. They died in a car crash when Jace was 9. Anyway, they had set up trusts for his education and they’d planned on sending him to Deerfield, because his dad went there or something. My parents weren’t gonna make him go, but they gave him the choice and he decided to do it. He actually really likes it there. Which was a surprise. I was expecting him to beg to come home after 3 months.
twobrokenwingsx: What about you? Any siblings?

rainraindownn: no. only child here.
rainraindownn: i don’t really have any family. my mom died when i was 13 and my stepdad and i never got along. as soon as i graduated i moved to idris and i haven’t seen him since.

twobrokenwingsx: I’m sorry.

rainraindownn: i probably have some family back in indonesia, but my mom didn’t have a lot of contact with them after she married my stepdad, so i never knew them.
rainraindownn: the flowers on my tattoo are for my mom, actually. they’re the flowers of indonesia.

twobrokenwingsx: They’re really beautiful.

rainraindownn: thanks :)
rainraindownn: but let’s change the subject away from depressing things and back to you telling me amusing stories about your misspent youth.

twobrokenwingsx: I wouldn’t call it misspent.

rainraindownn: let me have my dreams, alec.

twobrokenwingsx: Okay, okay, sorry. Don’t want to trample on your dreams.

rainraindownn: are you awake?

twobrokenwingsx: Yeah.

rainraindownn: what are you doing up? don’t you have school tomorrow?

twobrokenwingsx: I was writing a paper, but now I can’t sleep. How was work?

rainraindownn: it was work. drunk frat boys and sad old men drinking alone. i should tell you to go to bed, but i’m selfishly glad you’re here to talk to me.

twobrokenwingsx: Shouldn’t you go to bed too?

rainraindownn: it always takes me a couple hours to wind down after work

twobrokenwingsx: what do you usually do?

rainraindownn: listen to some music, read some blogs. watch a movie sometimes. i was thinking about watching donnie darko again.

twobrokenwingsx: I’ve never seen it. Is it good?

rainraindownn: alec! you’ve never seen donnie darko? we must fix this as soon as possible.

twobrokenwingsx: So it’s good then.

“Alec? Are you still awake?”

His mother’s voice startles Alec out of his contemplation of his and Magnus’ conversation. He quickly clicks over to his nearly completed paper as his mother opens the door, in her pajamas and robe, but with her make up still on.

“Hey mom,” he says. “Just finishing up this paper.”

“It’s due tomorrow?” She asks.

“Friday,” Alec says. “But I got on a roll so I figured I’d just finish it.”

“It’s late, honey,” she says. “You can finish it tomorrow.”

“Yeah, sorry, I didn’t realize how late it was.” His mom smiles tiredly at him.

“Go to bed.”

Alec nods. “Night mom.”

twobrokenwingsx: gotta go.

rainraindownn: you’re not getting out of this.

twobrokenwingsx: wouldn’t dream of it.

rainraindownn: speaking of dreams, have sweet ones.

twobrokenwingsx: yeah uh you too.

Alec goes bed still blushing.

On Wednesday Izzy meets him outside the locker room after track practice.

“I’m staaaaarving,” she says before he can even say hi.

“Isn’t that my line?” he asks, slinging his backpack over one shoulder and heading to the door.

“So you’re hungry too?”

Alec’s cell phone ringing stops him from answering. He’s expecting it to be Aline, or maybe Jace, but instead the display informs him it’s Magnus and he nearly drops it.

“Shit!” he says as he fumbles it. He manages to catch it and flip it open without destroying it. “Hello?”

“Alec, hey,” Magnus says.

“Hey,” Alec says. “Is everything alright?”

“Why do you immediately assume something’s wrong?” Magnus asks, and Alec can hear the pout in his voice even if he can’t see it.

“You’ve never called me before,” Alec points out. Although they exchanged numbers as well as screen names after the dance party, for the past week and a half they’ve communicated entirely through IM. Alec thought about calling sometimes, but chickened out every time. At least with IM he has time to gather his thoughts before speaking.

“Well, I do have a favor to ask,” Magnus admits. “But I could just want to hear your voice. You don’t know.”

“What do you need?” Alec asks. He holds the door for Izzy with the hand not holding the phone and they head out into the gray afternoon toward the student parking lot.

“My car died on my way back from class. I’m waiting for a tow, but I was wondering if you could give me a ride back home? I figured you’d be out of school by now?”

“Yeah, sure,” Alec says. “We’re just leaving. Where are you?”

“Who was that?” Izzy asks when Alec hangs up. Alec inwardly curses his penchant for blushing. There’s literally no way he can brush this off. That doesn’t mean he can’t try.

“Just a friend of mine,” he says, trying for casual. “His car broke down, so we’re gonna give him a ride.”

“A friend?” Izzy asks, “or a friend?”

“Um,” Alec says.

“Or like a friend but you’re totally pining over him?” He says nothing and she says, “Ooooh, what’s his name?”

“Magnus,” he says, and then adds, “and if you purposely embarrass me in front of him I will literally never speak to you ever again.” They reach his car and throw their bags in the backseat, then settle in. They have a brief argument over the CD player before Alec gives in, too nervous to put up much of a fight. Izzy waits until they’ve pulled out of the lot to bring up Magnus again.

“You really like him, huh?”

“Yes,” Alec says quietly.

“Does he like you back?”

Alec shrugs.

“It seems like maybe he likes you back. Is he the one keeping you glued to your computer lately?”

“He’s like …” Alec trails off trying to find the words to actually describe Magnus. “He’s older and he has all these friends and it’s like, I think I’m just new and seem shiny? But it’ll probably wear off.”

“Hey, you’re shiny,” Izzy says.

“I’m really not,” Alec says firmly. “I kinda just wanna enjoy this while it lasts.”

“If you like him that much, you should give him some credit. If he’s really worth it he’s already realized how amazing you are.”

Alec doesn’t respond for a few minutes. It’s not like he can argue with Izzy about this, but he doesn’t know what about him Magnus thinks is interesting and he can’t help but wait for the other shoe to drop. It was almost easier when he thought Magnus thought he was a poser. At least then he didn’t know what Magnus sounded like when he laughed, or what it felt like to be the sole focus of Magnus’ attention. He doesn’t want to lose those things, but he thinks it’s inevitable that he will.

“He’s also really hot,” he says finally. Izzy snorts out a surprised laugh. “Like, really hot,” he continues. “Like, out of my league hot.”

“No one’s out of your league,” Izzy protests.

“You’ll see when you meet him,” Alec says.

Magnus is sitting on a curb waiting for them in the strip mall with the good Chinese restaurant, hood up and cigarette between his fingers. He looks up and smiles when Alec stops his car in front of him, then flicks the cigarette away and stands.

Alec rolls down his window. “Only you can prevent concrete fires,” he says.

“Fuck off,” Magnus says, but steps back and grounds out the smoldering butt with the toe of his sneaker. “Hi,” he says when he slides into the backseat. “Thanks for coming to get me.”

“You must be Magnus,” Izzy says, turning in her seat. “We were gonna go to Diner 15, wanna come?”

“We were?” Alec asks.

“That’s what I was leading up to before Magnus called,” Izzy says. “You said you were hungry.”

“Did I?” Alec looks at Magnus in the rearview mirror in time to see him laugh.

“You must be Isabelle,” he says. “I will gladly come to the diner with you. We wouldn’t want Alec to waste away.”

Alec rolls his eyes, but he turns left to go to the diner. Their parents won’t be home until late anyway.

“Good music choice,” Magnus says. “I love this album.” Izzy turns in her seat again.

“You like Tegan and Sara?”

“Sure. They’re great.”

“I thought maybe you only like that whiny boy music that Alec listens to.”

Alec winces, but Magnus just laughs. “I like a lot of music. A lot of it, admittedly, consists of whiny boys. But they’re my people, so you have to cut me some slack.”

Izzy gives Magnus a considering look. “You don’t seem whiny.”

“That’s because you didn’t know me when I went through my last break up,” Magnus says easily. “According to my friends all I did was whine.”

“I’ll allow it,” Izzy says. “If you can teach Alec to have some taste.”

“Hey,” Alec says, feeling the need to defend himself. “I like Tegan and Sara. I just like Sleater-Kinney better.”

“See, you don’t need me,” Magnus says. “Alec’s fine on his own.”

Alec smiles, and when he goes to look at Magnus in the rear view mirror, he finds Magnus looking right back at him.

Diner 15 is just off Route 15 and is open 24 hours a day, seven days a week. The tables are topped with formica and the walls are covered in terrible faded photographs of New York City. There are little jukeboxes in all the booths, but only half of them work and they don’t have any music made after 1985.

It’s Alec and Izzy’s favorite place in the world.

“I’ve never been here before,” Magnus says when they’ve slid into Alec and Izzy’s favorite booth and Magnus has picked up his menu. “We always end up at The Palace because it’s near The Hideaway.”

“You’re missing out,” Izzy tells him.

“Clearly,” Magnus says. “How’s the grilled cheese?”

“Usually simultaneously burned but also raw and sometimes you get that good rubbery texture,” Alec says.

“Perfect,” Magnus says. “Are you guys even gonna look at the menu?”

“We kinda know it all anyway,” Izzy says. “Magnus, will you split chicken fingers?”

“He’s a vegetarian,” Alec tells her.

“Ugh,” she says.

“At least I’m not straight-edge too,” Magnus says lightly.

“Fine, mozzarella sticks?”

“Yes,” Magnus says.

“It would be okay if you were straight-edge,” Alec says, “Izzy’s just being a brat.”

“I understand,” Magnus says, “that some people are insufferable about it. Lorenzo recently decided he was vegan and now I’m apparently not allowed to eat cheese in his presence and it’s very annoying.”

“Do you even like Lorenzo?” Alec asks.

“Do you?” Magnus asks instead of answering.

“I think he’s a little full of himself. But I’m not the one who hangs out with him.”

“I don’t know,” Magnus says. He puts his menu down. “We’ve just always had the same friends but never really got along. The scene here is too small to really avoid people.”

“Our school is like that sometimes,” Izzy says. “But then you get to graduate and lose touch with people. When do you get to graduate and lose touch with Lorenzo?”

Magnus shrugs. “I guess when I get my shit together, figure out what I want to do with my life, and leave Idris,” he says, uncertainty shading his voice. But if it’s anything he doesn’t want to talk about, he’s saved by their waitress coming to take their order.

“I told you you were hungry,” Izzy says once they’ve ordered.

“I never said I wasn’t!” Alec says and flicks his straw wrapper at her.

“He always gets like this after track practice,” she says to Magnus. “You have to feed him or he gets cranky.”

“You’re the one who wanted to come here,” Alec says, but they both ignore him.

“Alexander,” Magnus says, “I didn’t know you ran track!”

“He’s on the varsity team,” Izzy says proudly. Alec blushes.

“Oh my God, you’re a jock,” Magnus says, a wide smile stretching across his face. “I can’t believe I didn’t know this.”

“I’m not a jock,” Alec protests.

“You’re kind of a jock,” Izzy says.

“Says the assistant captain of the girls’ lacrosse team,” Alec shoots back.

“He also competes nationally in archery,” Izzy says.

“Your school has an archery team?”

“No,” Alec grumbles, giving up. “I was in a travel league.”

“Wow,” Magnus says. “I’m so glad my car broke down today. Who knows how long it would have taken you to tell me this. Archery. Well, that explains the shoulders.”

“What’s wrong with my shoulders?” Alec resists the urge to hunch them. His parents and coaches spent a long time training him out of it when his growth spurt hit.

Magnus and Izzy both laugh and Alec bites his lip, willing the blush in his cheeks to go away. Izzy must notice, because she reaches across the table and pokes his arm.

“There’s nothing wrong with your shoulders,” she says. “They’re nice shoulders.”

Magnus nods. “They’re definitely not skinny emo boy shoulders. They were the second thing I noticed about you”

Alec blinks. He thinks that was a compliment, but he’s not sure. “What was the first thing?”

Magnus looks down at the table and smiles a small, secretive smile, then looks up. “Oh look, our appetizer is here.”

“Magnus, what—”

“Eat a mozzarella stick, Alexander,” Magnus says, and shoves one into Alec’s mouth.

Which Alec immediately spits back out onto the table. “Ow! Fuck! Magnus, that’s hot, what the hell?”

Magnus and Izzy laugh while Alec gulps at his soda, and they’re having so much fun he can’t even be mad.

Magnus’ apartment is in a building Alec didn’t even know existed between a car wash and a law office on the edge of what little downtown there is to be had in Idris.

“Thanks again for picking me up,” Magnus says when he takes his seat belt off. Izzy had insisted on sitting in the back on the way home, so Magnus sat in the front seat next to Alec. He went through all of Alec’s CDs and then put on Weezer, then he sang along and asked Alec questions about school and archery. “And for dinner. I had a lot of fun.”

“It’s no problem,” Alec says. “We had fun too. You’re welcome to join the Lightwood sibling diner excursions any time.”

“I’ll hold you to that,” Magnus says, then pauses. “Speaking of things I’m holding you to, I still have to show you Donnie Darko.”

“Okay,” Alec says.

“So I was thinking, I know New Year’s Project is playing on Saturday, but do you think Aline would be okay if you skip it just this once?”

“Um,” Alec says, trying to form words from the helpless circles his brain is spinning in, wondering if what he thinks is happening is actually happening. “Probably?”

“Cool, well do you wanna come over and watch it? You already know where I live.”

“I have a meet in the morning,” Alec says in what he hopes is a very normal voice, “but after that, yeah.”

“Cool,” Magnus says, his white teeth flash in the dark when he smiles. “I’ll see you on Saturday then. Thanks again!” Then he’s gone, slamming the car door and walking to his building. He waves before he shuts the door.

“Oh my God, Alec,” Izzy says. She doesn’t bother getting out of the car to get in the front seat, just climbs over the center console, nearly kicking Alec in the process. “Oh my God, he just totally asked you out, like right here.”

“Shut up,” Alec says faintly. Did that just happen? He can’t think about it right now. He puts the car into gear and concentrates on driving them home.

“Oh my God, he totally likes you.”

“Maybe,” Alec says into the dark. “Maybe.”

Not only is Aline okay with Alec skipping the show on Saturday, she practically forbids him to go. When Alec makes half hearted noises about not wanting to leave her alone, she points out that she actually has a lot more friends there than he does.

“Wow, cold,” he says, but he knows she doesn’t mean it like that, and besides, it’s true.

He’s grateful for his meet on Saturday morning. If he didn’t have something else to focus on he’s pretty sure he’d make himself sick from nerves.

He relents and lets Izzy help him with his hair, which he doesn’t bother with most of the time. He’s thought about growing it like a lot of kids the in the scene do, but it mostly grows out instead of down and he decided not to bother. Now seems like a good time to bother.

His parents are so used to hearing that he’s going to a friend’s house they don’t even ask him for details, just assume he’s meeting Aline there.

The sun is low in the sky when he parks outside of Magnus’ building and takes a moment to quietly and intensely freak out. It’s not even really a date. Magnus didn’t say the word date. They’re just hanging out. Alone. At Magnus’ apartment. In the dark. Fuck.

“Okay, Lightwood,” he says, “just get up there and don’t make an ass of yourself.” Then he gets out of the car.

When Magnus opens the door he nearly loses all the cool he spent so long trying to gather. Magnus looks amazing. It’s not all that different from what he might wear to the Hideaway: a deep blue v-neck t-shirt and tight jeans, but he’s wearing less eyeliner and his hair looks softer. Like he didn’t dress for everyone, just for Alec.

“Hey,” he manages to get out.

“Hey,” Magnus says. “My place is up two flights of stairs.”

Alec nods and follows him up the stairs, trying and failing to not stare at his ass.

Objectively Magnus’ apartment isn’t anything special. It’s a studio with a small kitchenette on one side, and a futon, currently acting as a couch in the middle. Most of the space is taken up by a long low entertainment center with a decent TV and an expensive stereo system. There are shelves and shelves of CDs and even records.

“Wow,” Alec says.

“It’s a dump,” Magnus says quickly. “But it’s home.”

“No, it’s nice.”

“You don’t have to be polite,” Magnus laughs. “Anyway, I ordered pizza, it should be here soon. Are you hungry?”

Alec is starving, the way he always is after a meet. “I could eat,” he says.

“Have a seat, I’ll set everything up,” Magnus says. The only place to sit is the futon, and Alec has a brief existential crisis about how close he should sit to the middle before he forces himself to just sit before he’s been standing too long.

Magnus sits a careful foot from Alec when he’s done putting in the DVD. Alec tries to pay attention to the movie, but he’s hyper aware of Magnus, how close he is and how often they almost touch. He’s jumpy and has to force himself not to fidget constantly.

It’s easier when the pizza gets there, and Alec can focus on eating instead of Magnus. Still, with all the moving around to eat, when the pizza is done they’re pressed together from hip to knee. Alec is pretty sure he’s going to implode. But somehow, right around the time Noah Wyle gives Donnie the book, Alec relaxes and gets really absorbed in the movie.

By the time Mad World fades into the credits, the sun has set.

“Wait, that’s it?” Alec asks. “He’s just dead? For good?”

Magnus shifts and Alec realizes they’re now pressed together along their entire sides. Magnus is warm and comfortable and Alec doesn’t want to move, so he doesn’t. Magnus doesn’t seem to mind, anyway. “He sacrificed himself to save Gretchen and the rest of the world. That’s the outcome he wanted.”

“But she’ll never know,” Alec says. He can’t explain the low level distress the thought causes. It’s only a movie, but it got under his skin. Magnus shifts away so he can turn and look at Alec. Alec’s arm feels cold, goosebumps prickling where Magnus was touching him.

“I like to think that she knows, somehow. Or that she knows that something important happened.”

“I don’t know if that’s better or worse,” Alec says after he thinks about it for a moment. “To know that something happened, but to not know what it is. That would drive me crazy.”

Magnus nods. “True. Maybe she’s the one who finds Roberta Sparrow in the new timeline.”

“Hmm,” Alec says, and leans his head back on the couch, stretching his neck out.

“Um,” Magnus says. Alec turns to look at him without lifting his head. “Are you tired? We could watch another movie.”

“I’m not tired,” Alec lies. His track meet is catching up to him, but he has hours yet before he curfew and he doesn’t want to leave. “What do you want to watch?”

“Maybe something lighter.” He stands up and stretches and Alec lets himself watch, his mouth going dry. Magnus saunters over to a shelf of DVDs. “Oh, but in keeping with our 80s theme, how about this.” He holds out a case for Alec to see: The Breakfast Club. “Tell me you’ve seen this one,” Magnus says.

“Of course I’ve seen The Breakfast Club,” Alec says. “Yeah, let’s watch that.”

Magnus switches the DVDs and makes his way back to the couch, but he doesn’t turn it on. “Hey, can I ask you something?”

“Sure,” Alec says, pulling himself to sit upright.

“Every other high school senior I’ve ever known is freaking out about colleges right about now. But you haven’t mentioned it once.”

“Oh,” Alec says. He runs a hand through his hair. “That’s because I got my acceptance letter in December, so I mostly just have to worry about keeping my grades up and graduating.” He doesn’t know why he’s embarrassed to talk about it. Maybe because his parents had made such a big deal out of it, seeming truly proud of him for the first time in a long time, announcing it to everyone. Alec hated to feel like he was bragging when so many people he knew were sweating it out waiting for their letters.

“You got in early decision? Where?”

“Columbia,” Alec mumbles. Magnus’ eyes widen and his face falls for just a second he smiles and pushes Alec lightly on the shoulder.

“So you’re like, athletic and smart and have great taste in music? Are you sure you’re even real?”

Alec ducks his head, blushing again goddammit, but he manages to say, “Not after watching that movie. Are we sure we’re even in the right timeline?”

Magnus laughs softly, settling into the couch. “John Hughes will fix you. It’s impossible to have an existential crisis while watching a John Hughes movie.”

Alec sits back too, pressing his shoulder against Magnus’. Magnus doesn’t move away. “Okay, I’m ready. Fix me, John Hughes.”

Alec blinks his eyes open to dim lights and Death Cab for Cutie playing softly.

“Passing through unconscious states,” a voice sings quietly near his ear. Fingers curl into the hair at the base of his skull. There’s soft cotton beneath his cheek.


His head, Alec realizes, is resting on Magnus’ shoulder, and Magnus’ arm is curled around him. He must have fallen asleep during the movie. He blinks again and tries to tilt his head up, but gives up and presses his nose back to Magnus’ shoulder. The fingers in his hair still.

“No,” he mumbles into Magnus’ t-shirt. “Feels nice.”

Magnus lets out an audible puff of air, half laugh and half sigh. But he goes back to scratching through Alec’s hair.

“Mmm,” Alec hums out his appreciation.

A part of him is aware that he should be mortified that he fell asleep on Magnus, but he’s not all the way awake yet, and the darkness and the music and the hand in his hair is making that problem seem far away.

He finally pulls together the will to move just enough to lift his head and look at Magnus. They’re only inches apart. Magnus is already looking down at him, one corner of his mouth quirked up in a sideways smile. Alec feels caught, unable to look away, but unsure of what to do.

Magnus leans down and presses his lips gently to Alec’s.

Alec freezes for a second. Only for a second, but long enough for Magnus to pull back, and that’s the last thing Alec wants. He chases Magnus’ lips, one hand reaching out to hold the back of Magnus’ neck and keep him close.

The kiss is longer this time, long enough for Magnus’ tongue to lick against Alec’s lips until he opens his mouth and lets it inside.

He’s wide awake now.

Magnus kisses him slowly but thoroughly, and Alec kisses back, hoping his enthusiasm for the task will make up for the fact that he has no idea what he’s doing. They kiss until the angle of Alec’s neck starts to really bother him and he has to pull away. Magnus makes an unhappy noise.


“Just my neck,” Alec says to forestall any questions about whether he’s okay.

“Sorry,” Magnus says, but he’s smiling.

“Let me—“ Alec shoves himself into a more upright position and turns back to Magnus. Magnus is already reaching for him, sliding one hand across his cheek and around his ear. Alec pulls him in and pulls, until, without quite knowing how it happened, he’s on his back and Magnus is draped over him, kissing his chin and down his neck.

Alec tightens his arm around Magnus’ waist and tries to urge him back to his lips. Magnus goes easily and Alec hums into his mouth. He feels Magnus smile against his lips in turn.

Alec doesn’t know how long they make out like that. He knows at some point he shifts his legs wider so Magnus can fit more comfortably between them and it brings their hips into alignment and sends a bolt of pleasure straight up Alec’s spine. He breaks the kiss to gasp and Magnus takes the opportunity to nip at his earlobe. It has Alec perilously close to coming in his pants. His hands tighten on Magnus’ hips, holding them slightly apart from his.

“Magnus,” he manages to get out. “Wait.”

Magnus stops.

Part of Alec hates it, but he needs a second to breathe. Magnus pushes himself up so he can look at Alec’s face.

“A little too fast?”

“Yeah,” Alec admits, and feels like an idiot.

But Magnus says, “Yeah, me too, a little.” He shifts until their hips aren’t so intimately pressed together and tucks his head between Alec’s neck and shoulder. “Sorry,” he says into Alec’s skin. “Just got a little carried away.”

Alec wraps his arm around Magnus’ shoulders. “No, it’s okay. It was um, good.” God, that’s an understatement. “Really good.”

“It’s just as well. You have to leave soon if you’re going to make your curfew.”

“What time is it?” Alec asks.


“Ugh,” Alec says, but he doesn’t move. He wants to live in this moment forever. Where his lips are tingling from so much kissing and Magnus is warm and solid on top of him. The CD has repeated and Ben Gibbard is still singing about waking up on the highway. It’s perfect.

He lets himself stay there for a few moments before he says, “I should probably go.” He doesn’t move.

“Probably,” Magnus says. He doesn’t move either. Another minute goes by before Alec thinks about what his parents will do to him if he’s late and how that will mean not seeing Magnus. He reluctantly lets go of Magnus and pushes himself up onto his elbows.

Magnus pouts at him. It’s so cute Alec has to lean forward and kiss him again. Magnus kisses him back briefly before pulling back. He rests his forehead against Alec’s. “You gotta go now or I’m not gonna let you,” he says.

Alec groans. He thinks he’d like that, but the time on the DVD player is telling him he’s cutting it close. “Raincheck on that,” he says.

Magnus pecks him once the lips before standing. “Definitely. Actually, so you know The Get Up Kids are playing Roseland Ballroom next week?”

Alec sits up and shoves his feet into his chucks. “Yeah, but it’s been sold out for forever.”

“Well,” Magnus says, “Helen and I are going and we have two extra tickets. Maybe you and Aline could come with us?”

Alec stops tying his shoe. “Don’t you want your friends to go with you?”

“You’re my friend,” Magnus says.

“I know but…” Someone you like better, is what Alec almost says.

Magnus raises his eyebrows at him. “If it makes you feel any better Mark and Raphael were originally going, but Raph has to work and Mark lost the rock, paper, scissors game to babysit their siblings that night. So you’re not stealing anyone’s ticket or anything.”

“Raphael from the The CD Center?”

“Yeah, you know him?”

“Kinda,” Alec says. “He–” that’s not the point. “I mean, yeah, I’d love to go. Um, I’ll have to talk to Aline and my parents, but yes.”

Magnus smiles at him, big and brilliant. “Awesome. We can get the train into the city early and get food before we hit the line.”

“Cool,” Alec says.

He makes his way to the door, Magnus right behind him. He stops with his hand on the knob and turns back. “Um, thanks,” he says, “for the movie and the pizza and–”

Magnus stops him by pressing a finger to his lips before replacing his finger with his mouth.

“I’ll see you on Saturday,” he says into the scant space between their lips.

“Yeah,” Alec whispers. Magnus takes a deliberate step back. “I’ll IM you,” Alec says. Oh God, that was lame. But Magnus is still smiling.

“Not if I IM you first,” he says.

“Okay,” Alec says.

“Okay,” Magnus says.

“Um, bye,” Alec says and forces himself out the door and down the stairs. He doesn’t stop until he’s in the car with his seatbelt on.

“Holy shit,” he says to the steering wheel. His whole body is thrumming with energy. He can feel everywhere that Magnus touched. Magnus touched him. Holy shit.

He turns the engine on before he can hyperventilate about it. Clarity blasts out, grounding him. He reaches for his cell phone, discarded on the passenger seat before he went inside, and notices one new voicemail. He lowers the volume and calls his voicemail to listen before he starts driving.

“Alec, I did it. I FUCKING DID IT!” Aline yells in his ear, and then hangs up.

Alec smiles into the dark and turns the music back up.

i’m shaking at your touch
i like you way too much
my baby i’m afraid i’m falling for you