Dean and Castiel were housemates and best friends. They went to college together, though Castiel was majoring in History and Architecture and Dean was studying to be an Electrical Engineering. They met in their first semester and found themselves drawn to each other. They didn't have many things in common but they understood each other somehow. Dean was funny and carefree, and Castiel was sarcastic and kind and loyal. They spent almost all of their free time together, watching movies in their apartment, or going out for drinks or just on random road trips around the state.
They were having the time of their lives. It was a shame that Dean didn't return Castiel's feelings. Yeah, exactly. Castiel was irrevocably in love with his friend Dean Winchester.
It was a Thursday night. Dean had had a date in the previous days. The lucky girl was called Amara, and though the date hadn't gone well according to Dean, Castiel was still a little cross about it. He shouldn't be, he knew that. Dean cared about him, but he didn't love him.
So, Castiel had gone out to the nearest bar and hooked up with the first girl that approached him there. He felt bad afterward, he felt like he had used that girl, so he asked her on a date. She said yes. Castiel hoped this was a good idea.
"Don't forget to use protection!" Dean called from the couch, unnecessarily so, as Castiel didn't plan on doing that tonight. Once had been enough. Dean was putting on The Fellowship of the Ring. It was one of Castiel's favorite movies, but he was sure Dean wouldn't mind to watch it without him. They both had seen it several times already.
Although, Castiel wished Dean told him not to go and instead watch the movie with him.
Castiel shook his head as he buttoned up his blue shirt. The shirt Dean had given him for Christmas. Jesus, everything in his life revolved around his stupidly gorgeous best friend. It wasn't fair. He looked in the mirror and smiled, remembering Dean's comment about how the shirt matched his eyes.
"Looking good, Cas," Dean muttered when Castiel stepped out of his bedroom, ready to go.
"Uh, thanks." Blushing, Castiel took his keys and his cellphone from the kitchen counter.
Just as he was about to leave the apartment, Dean spoke again.
"Yeah?" Castiel reacted, a bit too eagerly despite himself.
"Uh. Nothing, just... have fun, buddy."
"Oh. Thank you, Dean." They stared at each other for a few seconds, but it wasn't like it didn't happen often, so Castiel only smiled and left.
Meg was beautiful, and she was what other people called hot, but she was also so full of herself. Castiel felt like rolling his eyes forever. She talked so much but never asked something about his life or anything. Only "I did this, I did that," and such. She ordered a lot of food but barely eat. Castiel ate for both of them since he was really bored and nothing else to do.
After they left the restaurant, she offered him to go to her place, but he declined. He told her that he wasn't feeling so well, which was true, because of all the food. The truth was he wanted to see Dean. He wondered if he had invited someone to their apartment. Maybe he was bored and called Lisa or Anna. They would be watching Castiel's favorite movie, snuggling and making out on the couch, and then...
Castiel saw an older man arriving on a motorcycle just outside the restaurant. He looked dangerous, and Castiel wanted to grab Meg's arm and take her anywhere safe. But then she squealed and ran towards the man, who had just taken off his helmet, revealing blond, short hair.
"Luke!" she screamed, visibly delighted. They kissed passionately to Castiel's surprised. Well, this was another reason to let this girl go. Hopefully, this man treated her well.
He didn't stay to watch them go. He started walking towards his and Dean's apartment. God, he missed Dean. He wasn't even cross at his best friend anymore. How could he? It wasn't Dean's fault, Castiel was just being pathetic and childish.
Half an hour later, barely at nine thirty, he opened the apartment door, expecting Dean and some random girl kissing on the couch, movie forgotten, but what he found was rather surprising.
The TV was on with the final scenes of the movie. There were several bottles of beer over the coffee table, all of them empty.
Dean was sleeping on the couch, and he looks somehow really sad. How it was possible? Had something happened in the few hours he had been outside?
"Dean? Dean, wake up! Dean, are you okay?" he insisted, alarmed. If something happened and he wasn't there for his best friend...
"Cas?" Dean said, blinking rapidly, already too drunk. "What you doing' here? Is morning already?"
"No, Dean, I just came early. But Dean, you're drunk. Care to explain?"
Castiel's worried voice made Dean come back to his senses, at least a little. He grabbed his head and started crying.
"I'm sorry, Cas. I know I'm being stupid-"
Castiel hurriedly sat beside him and hugged him, though he still didn't know what was going on. Dean needed him.
"Just tell me, okay? I want to help."
"I wanted you to stay," Dean sobbed, his face pressed against Castiel's clothed shoulder. "But I couldn't- I couldn't do that to you, you deserve to be happy. And you just found someone-"
Castiel's stomach churned, not only because of all the food he'd had at the restaurant.
"Dean, you're not making any sense."
Dean had calmed down a bit, but he hadn't moved from his position. In fact, he seemed to be clinging to Castiel rather desperately. Castiel wasn't a selfish person but right at this moment, he felt a wave of excitement at Dean's sudden behavior.
"You'll hate me," Dean whispered. He sounded terrified. Okay, this was scary.
Castiel pulled apart a few inches to look at his friend in the eye. Even after crying, Dean was so beautiful, it hurt.
"Dean, I would never hate you. I couldn't do that even if I wanted."
That seemed to help because Dean nodded and sighed.
"I- I like you, Cas. Like, I really like you. I know you don't- you don't feel the same, and I'm being an idiot but I- after you left, I knew that I would never have a chance with you. And that hurt so much." he sobbed a little, but he managed to stay calm. "I'm sorry, I-"
If there was something Castiel knew about Dean, it was that the man always said the truth when he was drunk. And right know all him was being honest, honest and vulnerable. But he might not remember any of this in the morning, so he decided that they both needed to talk when Dean was sober. He couldn't just tell him right now that he felt the same way about him. If Dean decided ignored all of it tomorrow, to do nothing about it, what would be the point of confessing his feeling as well?
"Dean, we can talk about this tomorrow, okay? I promise I'm not angry at you. I don't hate you."
He managed to take Dean to bed (it wasn't like that! Although he would've liked that if he was being honest with himself). He brushed his friend's hair with his fingers, and Dean closed his eyes. In seconds, Dean was already back asleep, leaving Castiel replaying those words in his mind over and over. He finally fell asleep right beside his best friend. The bed was narrow so he didn't have much free space, but they both were fully clothed so hopefully, Dean wouldn't freak out when he woke up in the morning.
It was still dark when Castiel sensed somewhat strange. He opened his eyes and found Dean watching him intently. His eyes were a mixture of confusion and awe.
"Dean? Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"
"No, it's okay, Cas," Dean replied hurriedly. "Sorry I scared you."
"It's fine." Castiel closed his eyes again, waiting for the moment when Dean finally told him that last nights words had been a lie, that he was just too drunk and confused. It wouldn't be the truth, but it'd still hurt to hear.
"Dean, what I said last night-" Dean's voice sounded sad and Castiel just couldn't.
"I understand, Dean. You didn't mean it. I get it, I promise. You were just having a bad time. You don't have to apologize or anything."
"No, please, Cas. Hear me out, okay? I'm sober now, aren't I?"
Castiel opened an eye. That was a fair point there. The least he could do was listen.
"I know what I said. And I'll say it again if you want me to. I like you. I've had a crush on you for a long time, Cas. I just didn't think you- Cas, do you feel the same way about me?"
Silence. Castiel couldn't breathe. This was really happening. Last night was different because Dean was drunk and lonely but now they were both on Dean's bed, and there was no way this could be interpreted any other way.
"Yes. I do," he finally said. He opened both eyes and saw Dean's grin. They stared at each other, and then laughed together, shakily.
"How is this happening," Castiel muttered, still awestruck.
"I know. I'm sorry I didn't say something earlier."
"Not your fault. I should've talked to you. But I was scared."
"Well it doesn't matter now, does it?" Dean closed the narrow space between them and kissed Castiel lightly on the lips, then curled next to him, putting his arm over Castiel's abdomen. He smelled of beer and sweat, but he also smelled like Dean, and Castiel inhaled happily, sighing in contentment. They both fell asleep in each other's arms for a few hours until that stupid alarm went off and the sun greeted them through the blinds.
“Movie night tonight?” Dean asked shyly before Castiel entered the bathroom to take a shower. He turned and smiled.
“Of course, Dean. I’m looking forward to it.”