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04.13 "No Better To Be Safe Than Sorry"

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FORWARD – PREVIOUSLY ON…

OVER BLACK:

JULIA (V.O.)

Previously on the Magicians…

MONTAGE - VARIOUS LOCATIONS

A) INT. THE ROOM BETWEEN TIMELINES - 04.06 “A Timeline and Place” - PENNY 23 meets PENNY 40, now a respected member of the Order.

PENNY 40

That when the moment comes – do it.

B) INT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE KITCHEN - DAY - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - QUENTIN and ALICE sit at the counter, talking.

QUENTIN

I want you in my life.

ALICE

I want that, too.

They kiss.

THE BINDER (PRE-LAP)

The binder knew that Julia had many questions.

C) INT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE KITCHEN - NIGHT - 04.11 “The 4-1-1” - THE BINDER escapes from the book from the Mirror Dimension.

THE BINDER

He knew the answer.

D) INT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE LIVING ROOM - DAY - 04.11 “The 4-1-1” - THE BINDER and JULIA talk about her future.

JULIA

So you can help me become a goddess again.

E) INT. THE POISON ROOM - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - Zelda & Everett in the Poison Room talking in Zelda’s dream.

ZELDA

You’re hoarding magic? Trying to become a god?

EVERETT

By becoming one of them, I can rip their secrets away from them.

F) INT. THE SECRET SEA SHORE - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - FEN, PENNY & QUENTIN approach the shoreline.

EVERETT (V.O.)

I redirected the power I need into a reservoir.

G) INT. THE SECRET SEA SHORE - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - FEN with Fish!JOSH.

MARGO (V.O.)

You’re saying Josh is a fucking fish?

H) INT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE KITCHEN - NIGHT - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - PENNY comes to MARGO, who is trying to save JOSH from his fate as a fish.

PENNY 23

(urgently)

This should fix the whole fish deal. I’ll bring Eliot back.

I) INT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE STUDY - DAY - 04.11 “The 4-1-1” THE MONSTER kidnapping JULIA as PENNY tries to save her.

THE MONSTER

My sister. I need to find her a body.

J) EXT. FOREST - DAY - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - The SISTER MONSTER possesses JULIA.

QUENTIN (V.O.)

So the Monster took Julia?

K) INT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE LIVING ROOM - DAY - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - Planning meeting with PENNY, holding an ice axe. MARGO looks at Penny skeptically as QUENTIN and ALICE try and keep the peace.

PENNY 23

We need to find them. We have the axes and the demon bottles. You have the Incorporate Bond.

ALICE

Casting an Incorporate Bond strong enough to hold a god would take an insane amount of power.

L) INT. THE SECRET SEA SHORE - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - QUENTIN and ALICE drink from the Secret Sea and gain power. Quentin’s eyes glow bright with magic.

M) EXT. PARK - DAY - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - The MONSTER TWINS sit in a park planning their next moves.

SISTER MONSTER

The question is, who put us here.

THE MONSTER

Our parents.

SISTER MONSTER

They’re more vulnerable than you think – If we can get to their realm.

N) INT. THE POISON ROOM - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - THE MONSTERS find and unlock the scroll key to the Realm of the Old Gods.

SISTER MONSTER (V.O.)

We had a key. A scroll.

O) INT. THE LIBRARY HOLDING CELL - 04.12 “The Secret Sea” - THE SISTER MONSTER and DEAN FOGG in the Library holding cells.

DEAN FOGG

Julia, if you’re in there, I’m sorry.

Sister Monster is about to kill Fogg when –

QUENTIN (O.S.)

Hey! Monster… lady?

Sister Monster enters the hallway to find QUENTIN and ALICE. Quentin is equipped with an ice axe and the demon bottles and juiced up from the Secret Sea.

END OF MONTAGE.


INT. THE LIBRARY HOLDING CORRIDOR – CONTINUED FROM 04.12

The SISTER MONSTER enters the hallway, sizing up ALICE and QUENTIN, who have come equipped with an Ice Axe and demon bottles acquired by Margo in the desert in Fillory. They’re also enhanced by the Magic they acquired by drinking from The Secret Sea.

SISTER MONSTER

Adorable. So Determined.

Alice approaches, her gaze unwavering. Quentin watches Alice make her move.

SISTER MONSTER

Maybe I’ll keep you as pets.

Alice one handedly casts battle magic that throws the Sister Monster all the way down the hallway. She crashes against the wall, but she is only down for a moment before she gets up – unphased.

SISTER MONSTER

But then again, I like my pets strong. And you’re weak.

The Sister Monster is back on her feet and walking towards the two Questers.

SISTER MONSTER

You’re already fading aren’t you?

Suddenly behind her, PENNY 23 travels in, the second Ice Axe already raised to swing. The axe lands in the middle of the Sister Monster’s back and she screams in agony and falls to the ground.

The three Questsers are stunned that their plan actually worked.


INT. THE SECRET SEA SHORE

EVERETT enters the stone beach of the Secret Sea. He walks towards the water’s edge. This is the moment he’s been waiting thousands of years for.


INT. THE LIBRARY HOLDING CORRIDOR

PENNY removes the Ice Axe from the SISTER MONSTER’s back. Her god essence, much like the demons that had been possessing people in the desert, is pulled out of her like smoke escaping from a fire. ALICE opens the demon bottle and the Sister Monster’s free-floating essence is drawn into it. She quickly corks the bottle.

DEAN FOGG stumbles out of his cell to find Penny trying to lift the now free JULIA from the ground. She’s in agony from the wound that he inflicted to free her.

ALICE

It worked! Q, the Bond!

DEAN FOGG

I don’t know how long that’s going to hold. We need to get to Brakebills. I have something that can help.

QUENTIN and Alice cast the Incorporate Bond, sealing the Sister Monster into the bottle – at least for the time being. Penny cradles Julia, looking increasingly concerned and guilty.

PENNY

We need to get her help.

ALICE

Wait – where’s Eliot?

QUENTIN

We can’t. We don’t have enough. We have to go back to the reservoir.

PENNY

After we get her to a doctor!

JULIA

No, he’s right. We have to go to the reservoir.

FOGG

The reservoir is the priority. Let’s go.

Everyone groups in around Penny and Julia, and Penny travels them all to…


INT. THE SECRET SEA SHORE - CONTINUOUS

The whole team arrives on the rocky beach of the Secret Sea. They look towards the water – shocked and confused.

PENNY

Always gotta be a fucking twist.

The entire reservoir has been drained. They’re too late.


TITLES.


EXT. BRAKEBILLS UNIVERSITY – DAY

Students go about their lives on campus on a warm and sunny day.

FOGG (PRE-LAP)

In my office. Under my desk. Trap door.


INT. BRAKEBILLS HOSPITAL HALLWAY – DAY

DEAN FOGG lectures QUENTIN and ALICE who stand by anxiously waiting to get rid of the bottle holding the Sister Monster.

FOGG (CONT’D)

Popper twenty-two to unlock. Don’t put your hand in there – temperature’s at absolute zero. Should slow her down a bit.

Quentin and Alice exchange anxious glances. Suddenly over the bustle of the busy medical facility, a pained moan can be heard from the next room.

FOGG

Go!

The pair turn to go and Fogg returns to his other major concern – Julia.


INT. BRAKEBILLS HOSPITAL EMERGENCY ROOM - DAY

JULIA writhes in pain as DEAN FOGG enters. PENNY is at her side trying to keep her calm as PROFESSOR LIPSON does her best to diagnose and alleviate the source of Julia’s pain.

PENNY

(to Julia)

You’re ok.

Julia cries out in pain again as she struggles to stay stationary at all in the bed. The pain is excruciating.

PENNY

(to Lipson)

You wanna hurry that up!?

Fogg approaches Lipson who is analyzing Julia’s magical aura and her energies.

PENNY

Give her something for the pain at least!

LIPSON

Yeah, I just did – Twice!

(to herself)

Damn it.

Fogg produces a Dewey from his pocket.

FOGG

(giving the Dewey to Lipson)

Here, my last one. Use it on her.

PENNY

You’re going to be ok. Stay with me.

LIPSON

(a little astonished)

Thank you, Henry.

Lipson gauges the state of her patient for a moment, considering how to use the dean’s selfless gift.

LIPSON

(loudly)

Restraints, please!

PENNY

You are ok.

Penny is moved away from Julia’s side by an ORDERLY who brings in restraints to hold Julia to the hospital bed.

PENNY

(to Lipson)

What’s happening to her?

LIPSON

So her body - which is very weird – it keeps trying to close the wound – which is heavily enchanted because the weapon was also very weird – and it just tears itself right back open again.

PENNY

Well make it stop!

LIPSON

(dryly)

I hadn’t thought of that, thank you.

Once the orderly leaves Julia’s side, Penny immediately returns, grasping her hand and staring unwaveringly at her, hoping to anchor her.

LIPSON

I will use this to keep her comfortable and –

PENNY

How long is she going to be like this?

The professor begins to use the Dewey to make Julia more comfortable.

LIPSON

We are not in what I would call charted territory right now.

Penny looks over Julia, who is starting to calm down, but she looks like she is still in agony.

PENNY

I think I might know someone.

THE BINDER (PRE-LAP)

It was a difficult choice for Penny Twenty-Three to even call upon the binder.


INT. BRAKEBILLS HOSPITAL EMERGENCY ROOM – LATER THAT SAME DAY

LIPSON analyzes both the Binder’s book and THE BINDER himself. PENNY stands by, unhappy with the whole situation, but hopeful that this would help JULIA, who is now resting quietly in the hospital bed.

THE BINDER (CONT’D)

The Binder was certain however that Penny Twenty-Three had made the right choice. Julia, The Binder explained, would remain in a cycle of wounding, agony, for millennia. Her body required transformation. Luckily, this was the Binder’s expertise.

With a bit of showmanship, The Binder flexes his arms, ready to get going on this transformation.

LIPSON

Well great. Let’s get on with it.

THE BINDER

The Binder needed direction: Initiate her long and arduous journey to full goddesshood, or revert her body to that of a mere human.

LIPSON

If it was up to me that’d be a no-brainer.

PENNY

Yeah, but it’s not.

A solemn hush falls over the room.

PENNY

And it should be her choice.

THE BINDER

The Binder paused for Julia to make that choice.

(he pauses for dramatic effect)

Then dryly noted that she wasn’t in a talking mood. The Binder assumed that he was speaking with her husband or master?

PENNY

No. No!

THE BINDER

And yet the decision had to be made. Surely not, the Binder reasoned, by this spinster nursemaid.

LIPSON

Uh? I run this hospital, book!

THE BINDER

Still, the Binder replied, stating the obvious to the strident female, someone needed to choose for Julia.

Everyone in the room stares intently at Julia, searching for answers to the choice Binder has laid before them.

KADY (PRE-LAP)

Reed’s Mark?

PETE (PRE-LAP)

The best of bad options. Damage was done.


INT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE STUDY – DAY

KADY inspects PETE’s fresh Reed’s Mark tattoo as they sit in the library in the luxurious New York penthouse. The fire crackles and the dim, hazy room is lit by bright windows facing the normal, largely less magical world. Kady’s still slowly being killed by the poison she ingested from The Poison Room.

PETE

I’d rather not die, so it’s fine on that level, but also – look, I’ve no interest in being Batman, but there comes a point where even selfish bros need to mobilize. Six hedges in the last forty-eight hours were pulled into vans by men wearing grey. Woke up at home with Reed’s Marks.

KADY

Jesus.

PETE

The Library has stopped pretending. They’re rounding us up. We need you.

KADY

What if I just want to be done? After Penny and all this bullshit- You know what I wanted? To have something- someone- of my own. But hey, life sucks, then you die - then what? What if that’s all I want to do?

PETE

You’re human.

KADY

I’m weak.


INT. BRAKEBILLS HOSPITAL EMERGENCY ROOM - LATER

PENNY sits in the bed next to JULIA who is unconscious as PROFESSOR LIPSON hooks him up to some medical monitoring equipment as THE BINDER looks on, fiddling with instruments that he’s never seen while he waits.

PENNY

Look, I’ve Inception’d someone before. That crazy murdering Monster? I got all DiCaprio with him and I survived that shit. I’m way less worried about her.

LIPSON

You’re assuming that all of this-

(she motions to the Binder and Julia)

-has similar circumstances. There’s no way of knowing for sure how her current state may impact your abilities or even backfire on you.

PENNY

Danger or no, I have to try.

Lipson finishes hooking up the monitors and Penny lays back in the bed, shutting his eyes. It’s time to concentrate. This even has the Binder’s attention now.

Penny takes a deep breath, trying to find a place of calm he hasn’t experienced in a while. Voices slowly begin to whisper to him, but then rise in a cacophony. Some are coherent but many are incoherent.

FEMALE PATIENT (V.O.)

- can’t just say that shit and leave. When I get-

LIPSON (V.O.)

Why does he just keep staring? Creepy.

The only noise the Binder contributes is the sound of pages being flipped through.

MALE PATIENT (V.O.)

Ow! That really fucking hurt! He clearly doesn’t know what he’s -

NURSE (V.O.)

- eight CC’s, eleven - oh shit -

An echo of Julia’s voice crying out begins to cut through the other voices.

PENNY (V.O.)

Julia?

The other voices begin to fade away.

LITTLE GIRL JULIA (V.O.)

We took too long.

More screaming.

SERENE JULIA VOICE (V.O.)

We will survive so long as - Wait.

Penny’s eyes flutter and the rest of the world goes silent.

FADE TO BLACK.


INT. TRENTON HEDGE SAFEHOUSE - DAY

Hammers and power drills can be heard in the background as a large group of Hedge Witches are repairing walls and then casting wards on them. The place is in dire need of maintenance and clearly has been for some time. It’s a mixed-bag work party made up of local hedges both with and without Reed’s Mark.

KADY and PETE walk through the construction. AMBER, a young hedge woman who has become the unofficial foreman, walks up to Kady holding a clipboard and her cellphone. She's bouncing between the two while supervising the workflow.

AMBER

Good of you to turn up. We got worried they'd grabbed you, too.

There's a chilliness between her and Pete. Not hard to imagine given that Pete seems to piss off most people within the first day of knowing him.

KADY

Sorry, I had something come up.

Kady is visually unwell. She coughs and Amber finally looks up from her important text conversation and notes. Amber is about to ask Kady about her illness when-

PETE

What else do you need to get this place sealed? We're on a clock here and there’s still two safe houses in Philly we need to check in with today.

KADY

That’s assuming the Library hasn’t cracked these wards, too.

Hearing Kady’s lack of faith in their plan disheartens Amber. Her sudden anxiety brings a flash of anger.

AMBER

We’re going to need more fucking juice for one thing if we’re going to get these wards sustainable by tonight. Second of all, I don’t know what the fuck happened to you, but you promised you’d help us. We’re depending on you.

Pete intervenes.

PETE

Hey - don’t take this out on her.

KADY

(to Pete)

No, she’s right.

(to Amber)

Sorry. We’ll get you a Dewey. Will that be enough?

AMBER

I could double the wards on the whole block with that. Thanks.

Amber rushes off to let people know that the needed magic is coming.

Pete waits while Kady takes a moment to center herself.

KADY

Can you handle the two in Philadelphia?

PETE

Yeah, but they’re expecting-

KADY

They’re expecting me to live, and they’re right. Time for me to eat crow.


OVER BLACK:

There’s heavy, panicked breathing. It’s PENNY. We also hear echos of other voices: Julia’s screaming, Serene Julia and Little Girl Julia.


CUT TO:

INT. NEAR EMPTY DREAMSCAPE APARTMENT

PENNY’s eyes snap open. He’s laying on the ground under a dining table. It has cartoonish drawings all over the underside, clearly done by a child. It’s the dining table from Quentin’s childhood home that Julia kept with all of their drawings of Fillory underneath it. It's in the middle an empty apartment, Julia’s apartment from New York. The windows are blacked out and the lighting is chaotic. There’s pools of light that are occasionally interrupted by bright flashes or quick blackouts.

LITTLE GIRL JULIA (O.S.)

Penny!

A familiar girl, about 13, comes running to his side. This LITTLE GIRL JULIA looks the same as her shade did when it was separated from her body.

PENNY

Julia?

LITTLE GIRL JULIA

What’s happening? Did you get rid of her?

A loud wailing scream fills the room. It’s coming from the bedroom, which is closed.

PENNY

Get rid of who? What the shit is that?

LITTLE GIRL JULIA

Did you get rid of the Monster?

They slowly rise, Penny towering over the girl.

PENNY

Yeah, yeah we did.

He feels awkward so he crouches down to her eye level.

LITTLE GIRL JULIA

Then why are we still in here?

PENNY

Wait, who’s ‘we’?

From seemingly nowhere, GODDESS JULIA approaches them. She’s dressed the same way she was at Castle Blackspire when she appeared to remake the keys. He remembers her well.

GODDESS JULIA

‘We’ are all her. Splintered, worried, but all Julia.

She speaks in an ethereal way with great distance, but somehow with warmth and kindness. Little Girl Julia smiles at him sweetly. She’s filled with wonder and excitement that radiates off of her.

PENNY

Oh. I, uh, I see. I think. Look, she’s - you’re hurt. Really hurt.

A scream cuts through the air and the lights flicker out for a moment before a blinding white flash of light fills the room and everything settles again.

LITTLE GIRL JULIA

We know. Why do you think it keeps doing that?

GODDESS JULIA

We’re just not sure what happened.

PENNY

That I actually do know. The Ice Axe wound isn’t healing because your powers are conflicting with whatever freaky Fillorian magic pulled the Monster out so now you’re sort of stuck in the middle. I came here to find out what you want to do. This is it. You have to choose: Goddess or Human.

Another echoing cry rattles the world and the two Julias look at each other as the lights flicker out.


INT. NEW YORK HEDGE BLACK MARKET - AFTERNOON

After driving through three states all morning, PETE is already exhausted and his job today isn’t done. The market, his stomping ground, is in complete disarray. Many stalls are empty and others have bodyguards on top of their regular wards and protections. Today he’s not here as Lovelady. Today he puts his money where his mouth is.

PETE

Hey folks!

People continue to chatter. He pounds his fist against a nearby empty metal bin, creating quite a racket.

PETE

Alright everybody, listen up!

Now everyone’s looking.

PETE

Hi. You all know me so I’m going to make this brief: Serpent, the Library - They want us out, but guess what? We’re not going. Now, some of us have this-

He hoists his arm into the air displaying Reed’s Mark.

PETE (cont’d)

- but it doesn’t mean we can’t help. We’re still Hedges. We’ve fought for every scrap of magic we’ve got. And that’s what we’re going to do again.

Now that everyone’s definitely watching - some even drawing closer - he reaches into his bag and pulls out a map. It’s the partially mapped magic pipes that Kady and Alice managed to create.


INT. NEAR EMPTY DREAMSCAPE APARTMENT

PENNY, GODDESS JULIA and LITTLE GIRL JULIA sit, scattered around the room. Little Girl Julia is now laying under the table, pointing at different landmarks of Fillory. Goddess Julia sits peacefully under the dark windows. Penny, drawn to the sound behind the door, sits just outside of the bedroom. Julia lets out an agonized scream. Penny rubs his face and sighs.

PENNY

Listen, I get that this is a difficult decision. But the longer you take, the more she suffers.

GODDESS JULIA

Pain is temporary. She won't die. We have all the time we need.

Little Girl Julia sits up to plead with Goddess Julia.

LITTLE GIRL JULIA

Our friends need our help right now!

GODDESS JULIA

Then let me help them.

Young Julia turns away and returns to sitting under the table. She feels guilty. Penny watches this. He follows to sit under the table.

PENNY

Hey.

Little Julia won't look up at him.

PENNY (cont'd)

Wanna tell me what that was about?

LITTLE GIRL JULIA

She knows I'm scared.

PENNY

It's okay to be scared. I'm scared right now, too.

LITTLE GIRL JULIA

Then I should turn into a goddess and fix it. I can help so many people. I can change the world.

PENNY

Ok then, let me ask you this: why haven't you said yes?

Julia looks up at the crayon map.

JULIA

I wasn't ready to go.

Penny's expression softens with compassion.

JULIA (cont'd)

I had things I wanted to do. When I was like her (indicates goddess Julia) I forgot everyone so fast. I drowned.

She reaches up and touches the lines of the map.

JULIA (cont'd)

It was Quentin that found me. Every time. She even heard him. Praying for our help. That's why we saved magic.

Penny absorbs this. He gives little Julia a comforting squeeze on the shoulder and gets up. Goddess Julia hasn't moved. She looks serene and lost in thought. He crosses the room to her and she looks him in the eye.

PENNY

So what's your deal?

GODDESS JULIA

My deal?

PENNY

Yeah. Where did your emotions go?

GODDESS JULIA

I have them. They've just evolved.

PENNY

To what?

The goddess touches Penny's cheek.

GODDESS JULIA

You really love her don't you?

Penny huffs. He's getting impatient.

PENNY

Why do you think I'm in here?

GODDESS JULIA

Because you're lonely. And you miss the one you lost.

PENNY

This isn't my therapy session- so back off.

Julia in the other room, wails in agony.

PENNY (cont'd)

Listen, you both are Julia so just tell me what you want me to do.

The little girl and the goddess exchange looks.


INT. PHYSICAL COTTAGE DINING NOOK – DAY

JULIA concentrates on using magic to light a candle. She is not succeeding. QUENTIN quietly joins her, bearing two mugs of coffee.

QUENTIN

Hey.

JULIA

Hey.

He looks at her.

QUENTIN

(fumbling)

How is - How are-

JULIA

(interrupting his sputtering)

I'm fine. I feel like I’ve been run over by six or eight trucks but I’m fine.

QUENTIN

By fine, you mean -?

JULIA

What does it look like?

Quentin gives her a mug. He’s so grateful she’s alive and here that he’s struggling to focus on the pain of her losing magic.

JULIA

We have to talk about the Monster and his sister. I saw her plan - her goal – and its way worse than slaughtering the entire Library. They want to take it up with their parents – the Old Gods.

QUENTIN

Wait. What does that even mean?

JULIA

I don’t know. Neither does she. She just knows that it would feel good to kill them and eradicate us in some sort of insane nuclear winter which she could give negative three shits about.

QUENTIN

Well, do they know how to get to the Old Gods?

JULIA

They found a spell in The Library. It opens a door to their plane. My guess is that the Monster wants to find his sister, finish the plan, kill the Old Gods or get smashed to a pulp trying.

QUENTIN

That means smash Eliot.

JULIA

Well, the upside to them inhabiting our bodies was she left this in my pocket. Whatever’s in this is sure to unlock the door.

Julia produces the scroll stolen by the Sister Monster from the Poison Room from her pocket and hands it to Quentin.

QUENTIN

Holy shit. Well done.


EXT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE STREETVIEW SHOT OF BUILDING - DAY

The bustling daytime traffic of Manhattan zips by the high rise.

MARGO (PRE-LAP)

Well, shit. I was ready to give up.


INT. KADY’S PENTHOUSE KITCHEN - DAY

MARGO dumps the last of the water from Josh’s fish bowl onto the ground and JOSH stands up, having fully transformed back into his regular, non-fishy form. He also happens to be naked.

MARGO

Welcome back.

Josh is shocked, a little chilly, but also completely overwhelmed with sensation.

MARGO

Towel?

JOSH

Uh, yeah. Thank you.

She hands Josh a towel while unapologetically looking over his naked body. She’s both genuinely happy to see her latest partner alive, well, and naked, as well as feeling the overwhelming need to drown herself in a more plastic persona until there’s word on Eliot.

MARGO

So was it weird being a fish?

JOSH

It felt, uh, very natural? The weird part was –

Josh wraps the towel around his waist. Margo picks up her eye, pulls off her eyepatch, and pushes the fairy-magic eyeball back into her head.

JOSH

- how you were so incredibly selfless? And, no offense, sweet? Which is –

MARGO

Not on brand? I know. Anyone who really knows me knows I’ll do anything for my people.

This, of course, makes Josh smile.

MARGO

Listen Hoberman, don’t be stupid. I’m not actually fun or easy when I care about you.

JOSH

Fun and easy are overrated.

They kiss. She pulls off his towel and throws it aside.

Then PENNY travels in, facing them and disgusted.

PENNY 23

Ugh. Christ! Not my day.

Margo and Josh stop kissing. Josh is way shier about the situation than Margo.

JOSH

Oh, hi, sorry, I just unfished so… Anyone else super hungry? I’m craving fish sticks. Is that weird? You know what? I’m just going to go with it.

Trying to cover his exposed junk, Josh scurries around the kitchen counter to start preparing his food. He manages to discreetly slip on an apron. Naked with just an apron is not a new look for him. Margo is fixated on Penny.

MARGO

Where’s Eliot? Did you do it?

PENNY

We got one so far.

MARGO

You didn’t save Eliot, did you?

She looks him over. Despite how authoritative she seems, tears well in her eyes.

MARGO

Of course you didn’t. You cocked it up trying to save Julia. That bitch has a bulletproof body.

PENNY

Not anymore.

MARGO

We don’t even know if Eliot’s still alive in there.

PENNY

There was a shit show. You don’t even know what the hell was going on.

MARGO

You had one fucking job. The only reason this shit ain’t done right now is because someone had to save Josh’s life today. And the list of who could do that was very fucking short. Guess I really do have to do every single fucking thing myself.

As they argue, Josh puts his fish sticks together on a tray.

PENNY

Hey, fuck off, Margo.

MARGO

Oh! Jesus Herbert Walker Christ you’re predictable, you know that?

Josh tries to quickly use some magic to cook the fish sticks and the whole counter lights on fire. Both Penny and Margo stop arguing as the fireball flickers and vanishes. Josh is left as the shocked center of attention.

JOSH

Woah.

MARGO

(to Josh)

What the shit?

JOSH

Oh my god. It just came out of me so strong. Guys, I think I have some special Fish Magicks. Act out, right?!

PENNY

Or you touched the reservoir and you got dosed up?

MARGO

Yeah, that makes a thousand times more sense.

JOSH

But still pretty “act out” worthy, no?


INT. BRAKEBILLS OFFICE – DAY

PROFESSOR LIPSON prepares IVs and tends to her two newest patients, ZELDA and KADY. They’re set up in an office with two chairs so they can receive their treatments in comfort while they wait for the IVs to do their thing.

ZELDA

Hello, Kady.

KADY

(bitterly)

How are ya, Zelda?

ZELDA

I understand your anger –

KADY

No you see that would require actual human feelings.

ZELDA

Kady –

KADY

You piece of shit, pearl clutching, sociopathic –

ZELDA

None of this was calculated on my part. Everett? I have believed in his goodness for over a century.

KADY

Everett is in it for Everett.

ZELDA

If you are right, then all the death – all of it – is on my hands.

Lipson connects Kady to an IV to treat her Poison Room affliction.

KADY

Look, I know you’re not evil. Just the definition of obedience.

ZELDA

I used to be.

KADY

Prove it.


INT. BRAKEBILLS LIBRARY – DAY

PROFESSOR LIPSON checks her devices monitoring JULIA’s vitals.

LIPSON

Man I’m good.

Julia sits in a chair looking wholly disconnected from the reality around her.

JULIA

Yeah, great. Thanks.

Julia attempts magic again, this time to pour herself a glass of water, to no avail. PENNY enters, looking for Julia. She angrily pours herself a glass of water the old fashioned way.

PENNY

So you, uh, you feel ok?

JULIA

Yeah. Thanks. And by thanks, and by thanks I mean thank you for deciding that I should age, grow old, and probably die from a papercut. Oh yeah! And that I’ll never get to magic again because I’m perfect now. Did Professor Lipson tell you? I’m perfectly normal and we all know magic don’t come from normal, so thank you for deciding that without me.

LIPSON

I, uh,

(clears throat)

have to do the thing.

Lipson scurries out of the room.

PENNY

Julia, listen to me. This was your choice.

JULIA

It was my decision, but then you took that from me! I was in a coma.

PENNY

You don’t remember, do you? Of course you don’t. You were in the-

JULIA

Remember what?

PENNY

You, well some little girl version of you, made the choice. I went into your head to talk to you but you were splintered or some shit. Of course you were, this shit’s been tearing you apart for months. And of course I went in there to try and save you, but you - you’re the one who saved yourself. You made a choice. You wanted this. I promise.

JULIA

Then why don’t I remember? Why don’t I feel that way?

PENNY

I don’t know. It really, really sucks.

Penny feels both responsible and concerned for her, but he can see that her hurting may need to be sorted out on her own and he turns to leave.

JULIA

Wait. Penny. Will you just stay here and let me be pissed at you?

Though he’s not sure he deserves her wanting him to stay, it’s not for him. He turns around to join her again.

PENNY

I can do that.

They sit in silence while she mourns the loss of what could have been for the first time today.


INT. NEW YORK HEDGE BLACK MARKET - DAY

Fresh-faced, or at least not visibly dying any longer, KADY comes into the vast black market space in search of PETE who is at the center of a bustling group of busy Hedges. They’re constructing a similar barrier to the one we saw in Trenton and a group of them are leaning over the map which is laid out on a table. With them are all the supplies to locate and rupture a pipe as well as two smaller batteries to charge.

PETE

That one’s too close to the 5th and 42nd. We’d get pinched before we even got close. We have to try -

Pete looks up from the intense debate when he hears Kady’s footsteps.

KADY

Hey.

PETE

Oh, hey, I thought you were my delivery guy.

KADY

Sorry to disappoint.

She saddles up to the table and everyone respectfully makes a hole for her.

PETE

Far from it. As much as I want my chow mein, you’re much more helpful.

KADY

Thanks. So, where’re we at?

PETE

Up the creek as it were. The junction boxes in the city are all really well placed if you’re the Library and you want to keep an eye on them.

Kady takes a moment to look over the map. Some of it is in her own handwriting so she knows it well.

KADY

Here.

(she indicates a junction box Uptown)

This is where we slipped the beetle in.

PETE

Ballsy. That’s really close to the school.

KADY

Yeah, but there’s a blind spot here.

(she points to a place on the map)

Old Harlem speakeasy. Charmed. Really, really hard to see through. Really good Old Fashioneds, too. Just so happens that it’s in the line of sight from the campus library to the junction box.

Everyone leans in. The plan is taking shape.


EXT. UPTOWN NEW YORK STREET - DAY

Looking like every investment banker in the city, PETE rests at the corner of towering brownstone, devouring chow mein with a fork. He’s the lookout for their operation since magic isn’t really happening for him right now. Meanwhile, KADY and a small HEDGE STRIKE TEAM move around the building. Kady moves right for an empty-looking wall and suddenly she can feel the small rupture they had used to squeeze their beetle into the pipes in the first place. They all can feel it.

KADY

It’s here.

One of the team produces a large pane of glass that reveals a coppery Library pipe in front of them. The leak, while very small, is enough to pry open. Kady and two other hedges use the glass as a guide to cast a spell that pries open the pipe while one of them manipulates the meter. They don’t want a repeat of Modesto.

One of the team produces two batteries that had been completely drained and, with a simple casting, they quickly soak up some of the free-flowing ambient magic until they’re practically vibrating with energy.

KADY

That’s good, let's get out of here.

The group of them move quickly to stash all their tools and equipment before heading back down the alley. When they get to PETE, he gets up and moves with them.

PETE

All good?

KADY

We got it. Make the call.


INT. NEW YORK HEDGE BLACK MARKET - DAY

The barrier is nearly complete and what was an empty market is now bustling with hedges from all over New York. This is the new rally point for the under-siege Hedge community.

When the team return, everyone can tell when the batteries are in the room. It’s like there’s meat on the barbeque. The excitement in the room rises.

KADY

Alright everybody, listen up.

KADY commands the whole room easily. She grabs the batteries from her TEAM MEMBER and lifts them for everyone to see.

KADY

These are just the beginning. I promised you that we could beat the Library and this is how we do it. We have to stay together. Fight together. That’s how we’re going to beat Serpent. That’s how we get a seat at the table.

Everyone cheers. PETE looks on with pride.

KADY (cont’d)

Tonight, this is the first protected Safe House in New York. If we stay together, no one else gets taken.

The crowd cheers again and then go back to what they’re doing. Pete walks over. Kady hands the batteries over to him and he examines them.

PETE

Good speech. Very inspiring.

KADY

Thanks. We just need to actually make it true now.

PETE

Yeah.

(he takes a beat with the batteries)

I’m going to go give these to people who can actually do something with-

A loud thud interrupts the preparations. A section of the barricade has fallen inward. It was no accident. As the dust settles, the silhouette of EVERETT appears. He’s vibrating with power. The freshly cast wards ripple and break away. He raises a hand and one of the workers goes flying, the body crumpling against the far wall. He moves straight for Pete who is still holding the batteries.

EVERETT

You’ve taken something that does not belong to you.

Kady moves to cast a complex looking piece of battle magic, but Everett is too quick and throws her aside. She gets up quickly, bleeding a little, just in time to see Everett Force-choking Pete and pulling away the two batteries.

Through the hole in the defenses, a troupe of Librarians enters, using a spell to quickly and efficiently knock out many of the Hedges and they quickly begin to take them away.

Pete has no defenses and the batteries are ripped away from him and he starts to go limp. Kady gets up and blasts Everett, but it doesn’t seem to affect him at all.

KADY

(to herself)

What the hell?

Now in possession of the two batteries, he crushes them in his bare hands, and the power visibly enters his body. He now diverts his attention to Kady, leaving Pete to fall limp to the ground.

EVERETT

Where is he?

He pushes her against the ground, cracking the concrete around her.

KADY

(straining)

‘He’ who?

EVERETT

The Monster.

BLACKOUT.


EXT. PHYSICAL COTTAGE – DAY

The cottage yard is scattered with autumn leaves as the afternoon wears on.

JOSH (PRE-LAP)

So Everett wants to be a god.


INT. PHYSICAL COTTAGE LIVING ROOM - DAY

The cottage is empty. The Questers have scared away any of the other students for the time being. JOSH, MARGO and QUENTIN hold a planning session to regroup and figure out what to do next to get rid of the Monster and save Eliot.

JOSH (CONT’D)

And now he’s so juiced that he can just rip the god power right out of Eliot? So why don’t we just let him?

MARGO

So let that that psycho book fondler rip the Monster out of Eliot and probably kill him?

Margo leaves Josh searching for something to say as she storms off.

QUENTIN

Hey, come on. Where’re you going?

JOSH

(looking the way Margo left)

I’m thinking this isn’t just about spitballing ideas here. We don’t know for sure Everett will kill him, right?

QUENTIN frowns at Josh.

QUENTIN

That’s not good enough. She’s right. Anything where he could die is off the table.

Before they have a chance to get Margo back, THE MONSTER appears from nowhere.

THE MONSTER

Hello.

JOSH

Shit! I mean – Hi.

THE MONSTER

Where is my sister? Where’s the scroll?

Already Josh tries to make quick work of hiding the scroll that was laying around for their planning sesh.

QUENTIN

The scroll?

THE MONSTER

Answer me now.

QUENTIN

What does it look like again?

Josh reaches the scroll but it reacts to his extremely potent soaked-up magical energy in him (aka Fish Magicks). It glows and unfurls as Josh unwittingly activates it. A glowing white light suddenly emanates from a portal that opens beside them.

THE MONSTER

No!

Quickly, Quentin assesses the situation and shoves Josh through the opening portal as the Monster makes a run for it, too. The two Questers enter the portal and it closes promptly behind them, leaving the Monster alone in the Cottage for a moment before DEAN FOGG enters.

THE MONSTER

I don’t like, you, do I?

FOGG

I have no idea. But I can assure you, you will hate me.

Not sparing a moment, Fogg casts a spell that transports the Monster to –


EXT. FOREST – DAY

THE MONSTER falls to the ground coughing. The spell worked and the annoying human had banished him to some unfamiliar place leaving him disoriented and alone.


INT. BRAKEBILLS OFFICE - DAY

Zelda looks out the window, rubbing her forearm. It’s still pink and tender but healing. Alice walks into the room.

ZELDA

What can I do for you, Ms. Quinn.

ALICE

We need a source of power.

ZELDA

Everything the Library knew, Everett did as well. I’m afraid there are no avenues.

ALICE

Then why are you so calm?

Zelda indicates for them to sit. Alice hesitates, but finally does it. They look at each other.

ZELDA

Everett was my mentor. He found me and saw something in me. It turns out that what he saw… It was more than he expected.

ALICE

I’m sorry.

ZELDA

No, no. I’m not telling you to feel sorry, I’m telling you because I see the same potential in you that he saw in me- the ability to see beyond the backwards, stunted old ways. There is something different about you, Alice Quinn. Something beyond anything we could have prepared for.

ALICE

What are you saying?

ZELDA

I’m saying that the Library needs you. But that’s for another time. You need something from us, something more pressing. I don’t have a secret solution other than you.

ALICE

What?

ZELDA

You have a singular mind, Ms. Quinn. I believe the answer you’re looking for is in you.

ALICE

I didn’t come here for cryptic bullshit.

ZELDA

Forgive me, I merely mean to say that you and your friends have proven to be resourceful in the greatest times of need. I wish I had a secret to gift to you for the coming fight, but I trust you will find a way.

Alice sighs, glancing around the room as though it could offer a better lead. She gives Zelda a gentle, appreciative look before turning on heel and rushing out.


INT. VORTEX

QUENTIN and JOSH, screaming in pure terror, hurtle through a seemingly endless vortex to an unknown destination.


INT. REALM OF THE OLD GODS – DAY

QUENTIN and JOSH land on the ground, still screaming. They’re in a bland office building with very bland artwork on the beige walls with nondescript office furniture. A banner unrolls with some pomp and circumstance (as well as balloons) that reads: CONGRATULATIONS! They’re still so disoriented and screaming from the existential terror they just experienced.

The GOLF comes strolling in holding a putter. He’s overjoyed to see them, but in the way that any middle-management boss would be overjoyed to see the newest janitor.

GOLF

Hello!

The two Questers scream more.

GOLF

You did it! What an achievement, huh? Two humans! Task seven-hundred-and-sixty-four is what usually trips your kind up but, hey, as we say in the near-base binary, infinite time is just a parabolic lost sock. Right?

Neither human understands a word of this gibberish.

GOLF

You do speak the near-base binary, don’t ya?

There’s great hesitation as both Quentin and Josh struggle to think of a single thing to say.

GOLF

No? Then how did you complete task seven-sixty-four? Or the rest of the twelve-hundred-and-ninety-three?

QUENTIN

Ok, so we’re not on a quest.

JOSH

We were!

QUENTIN

Yeah. Last year.

JOSH

Crushed it!

QUENTIN

Totally! Except for the part we’re trying to fix now.

GOLF

Wait wait, hold on. How do you have the resident singularity scroll?

JOSH

Kind of by accident. My Fish Magicks went off and…

QUENTIN

No, don’t.

GOLF

I was not trained for this eventuality.

JOSH

We just want to talk to an old god.

GOLF

Do ya now? Let me explain this in the way you might understand. A Chihuahua just demanded a blow job from an archangel. Also? I am not explaining “Fish Magicks” to my bosses.

JOSH

It’s a real thing…

GOLF

Also? Tee time.

QUENTIN

No. Come on. Look. Hang on. Hang on! Look! We need the Old Gods but they need us, too!

GOLF

Need you? Hubris much?

JOSH

Five minutes? Please?


INT. REALM OF THE OLD GODS – A MOMENT LATER

GOLF putts a paper ball golf ball, trying to get it into a coffee mug on its side.

QUENTIN

So the Old Gods wouldn’t maybe be a little bit motivated to help once we told them about the-

GOLF

Not really. Those monsters? Sorry nobody told you but, uh, can’t be killed.

QUENTIN

Then why create them at all?

GOLF

Why are nickels bigger than dimes?

Golf shrugs and resumes his putting.

JOSH

Huh. Why are nickels bigger than dimes?

QUENTIN

(to Josh)

Stop.

(to Golf)

Wait so there’s no way to stop them?

Finally Golf gets the ball into the cup.

GOLF

Yes!

The mysterious figure then returns his attention to the Questers.

GOLF

You said “kill”. They can be stopped.

JOSH

And can you think of any good reason why your bosses won’t want us to do that?

GOLF

I mean, if they don’t have to actually do anything? Can’t hurt. Ok boys, here’s my advice. Drop ‘em in The Seam.

This elicits no response.

GOLF

The Seam? This is ridiculous. You’re imbeciles!

JOSH

Not arguing that, but… The Seam between what exactly?

GOLF

This universe and, you know, the antiverse! Where everything’s all dead?

QUENTIN & JOSH

Oh.

QUENTIN

So we go to the… The dead verse?

GOLF

Duck on a muffin! No! You go up to The Seam. You drop the suckers in.

JOSH

And that would be… where?

GOLF

Use your heads guys. The Seam’s not quite sealed. What could that mean? Oh! Maybe it leaked and created a weird little pocket world where everything’s all backwards and lifeless.

QUENTIN

(starting to get it)

Wait, the Mirror World?

GOLF

Sure. Not a bad name. So you go there, you find The Seam, and whatever you toss in will never ever come back out again.

He checks his watch.

GOLF

I am insanely late. Here you go.

Suddenly Josh and Quentin are holding massive slices of decorated cake. Again, very confused.

GOLF

To the victors.

(he golf claps)

Cake!


INT. NEW YORK HEDGE BLACK MARKET - DAY

A blanket is wrapped carefully over a DEAD MAN’s face. It's the Hedge that Everett threw across the room in the fight. KADY rises from having spent a moment mourning the dead man. She’s got dried blood on her face and a few burst blood vessels from the fight. Soon they will turn to bruises, but not yet. She’s sore and pissed as all hell.

What was supposed to be their refuge is now wrecked and people are completely at a loss. Kady moves to join PETE who is nursing the already appearing bruise around his throat with an ice pack under his loosened tie and collar.

PETE

So, what now?

The two sit and survey the damage for a moment.

KADY

I-

(she shakes her head)

I don’t know. That wasn’t just a few Deweys in his pocket. He did it - he drank the reservoir. All that power...

She’s frustrated and seeing where her power here ends. Time to take out Everett.

KADY

We take the fight to them. I’ve got to go see some people - warn them. We’ll figure this out.

She starts texting Penny for a pickup.

PETE

You think your friends can do it? Haven’t they been a little… I don’t know… self-interested lately? Always?

KADY

They’ll help.


INT. PHYSICAL COTTAGE - DAY

ALICE and JULIA sit at the dining table, surrounded by books. They’ve stopped, rapt in conversation with MARGO.

MARGO

- and then they were just fucking gone.

JULIA

And Fogg is sure that they’re in the realm of the Old Gods?

MARGO

Jesus, who knows.

ALICE

So - what - we just wait?

JULIA

Not too long, though, if that cloaking spell is as limited as it sounds. We know where The Monster is, but if that wears off, Everett will, too. Hopefully, Q and Josh can-

KADY rushes in with PENNY 23. She’s wrecked from the battle. Penny joins Julia at the table checking in on her.

MARGO

What the hell happened to you?

KADY

Everett drank the reservoir.

ALICE

We know.

KADY

(annoyed by Alice)

Well, now he’s attacking Hedges in broad daylight. He’s hunting the Monster. He’s out of control.

MARGO

Shit. Clock is ticking then. We’ve got to make our move.

ALICE

Except there’s still not enough magic, especially now that Josh and Q are missing.

MARGO

Well, we gotta find something because if we don’t, Everett’s going to turn Eliot into a pinata trying to get the Monster out of him and I’m sure as hell not going to bow to some psycho book jockey with a god complex.

A strange sound from somewhere over by the bar cuts the conversation short.

JOSH (O.S.)

Guys?


INT. PHYSICAL COTTAGE – MOMENTS LATER

QUENTIN and JOSH stand in the middle of the living room finishing their cake while the explain the insanity that just occurred to the rest of the team.

KADY

Ok, but the Mirror Realm is an entire world. How will we find The Seam?

JOSH

God damn it. I don’t think I can eat non-Old God cake again. Perfection is a curse!

Everyone really just wants them to finish this story so they can figure out what to do next.

JOSH

Oh. Right. Find The Seam. Guy didn’t say.

ALICE

We don’t have to go looking for it. I think I know where it is. There’s this place. This door. And what’s behind it felt… different.

MARGO

Different like… ?

ALICE

Like I knew I shouldn’t go near it, even when I was a Niffin.

KADY

Well, perfect. We should definitely all walk right in there.

QUENTIN

So, according to Fogg, the Monster’s out there right now, confused, for as long as that spell will last. Twenty-three, if you can travel us out there we have an opportunity to surprise him.

JOSH

Now this is where we open up the room for pitches because I accidentally lost all my Fish Magicks and now none of us has the juice to do the Bond.

MARGO

There has to be something else.

KADY

There is. Hedge Witches.

MARGO

Can barely tie their shoes.

KADY

Fuck you. And also you’re wrong. They’re a huge untapped pool. Look, they’re used to crumbs. And yes, ambient is low, but you know what amplifies it?

JULIA

Cooperative magic.

KADY

We tell everyone, and I mean all over the world. Wherever there’s a pipe. Fillory even. And we all do the same thing at the same time.

MARGO

You can’t get that many people to cooperate. This isn’t Sesame Street.

ALICE

There are some shitty hedges, but there are enough good ones that we could pull this off. And we need them. Kady’s right. This is a good idea.

JULIA

We need a way to get the message out fast to time it right.

KADY

I’ve got someone who can help.

ALICE

They’d have to keep casting the entire time so we can keep the Monsters in the bottle ‘til we get them through The Seam.

JOSH

This is right on the hairy edge of what I’d even call a plan.


INT. PHYSICAL COTTAGE – LATER

QUENTIN heads upstairs to finish preparing for stopping the Monster and the trip into the Mirror Realm when ALICE intercepts him.

ALICE

Hey, Q, can we talk for a sec?

QUENTIN

Yeah.

ALICE

I’ve been thinking.

QUENTIN

Me, too. I-I think that, um, you should tell me where The Seam is so that I can do it.

ALICE

Why you?

QUENTIN

Because I’m better equipped to –

He can’t really come up with a good reason.

QUENTIN

Because I want you to be safe.

ALICE

I want you to be safe.

They pause. They’re at an impasse. Together they sigh and sit on the stairs side by side.

QUENTIN

Are you saying that you want-

ALICE

No. I’m saying that we’ve tried the whole saving each other thing with mixed results.

QUENTIN

Yeah, sure. But I-

ALICE

And I’ve been thinking about what works best and I think, no I know, we’re best when we’re a team. Ok when me and you - together.

QUENTIN

If nothing else I like the sound of it.

ALICE

Because it’s true. So it’s decided?

From out of nowhere, MARGO comes strutting by carrying her double Ice Axes.

MARGO

Ok people, let’s do this. If you need to touch butts make it quick, we’ve got a multiverse to save.

ALICE

How does she know our thing?

They laugh, then kiss before following Margo past JULIA and PENNY. Quentin stops short, lingering at the corner of the sectional sofa. He’s not really listening to the conversation - he’s waiting his turn.

QUENTIN

(to Alice, sending her ahead)

Just a sec, ok?

PENNY

Stop torturing yourself.

JULIA

I want to help.

PENNY

Julia, it’s gonna to be ok. Or it won’t.

JULIA

You’re just zen because you think this is it. What other Penny told you. Some big thing you have to do.

PENNY

No. I’m zen ‘cause there’s a lot scarier shit than dying and right now I’m lookin’ at you, so I’m good.

He pauses for a moment before glancing over his shoulder to see Quentin waiting to talk to Julia.

PENNY

Time to go. Be seeing you.

Penny gets up and gives Quentin a long glance before joining the others by the Rams Clock. Julia looks up at Q with a sad smile.

JULIA

So this is it, huh?

QUENTIN

(nervously)

Guess so.

Quentin moves to sit close to Julia on the window ledge bench.

QUENTIN (cont’d)

Hey. I- we did this before. Just before Blackspire. And, well, we got lucky. But we’re about to do some dangerous shit again and goodbyes-

Before he can continue babbling, Julia throws her arms around him.

JULIA

I love you, Q. Go get him. I’ll be here when you get back.

He’s overwhelmed by her support and intuition in the moment. Perfect Julia. Even without goddess magic. He holds her close before they both release and he gets to his feet again.

QUENTIN

See you soon, ok?

She waves with a sad but supportive smile. She’s seen the hurt this ordeal has caused him and she’s happy not only that Eliot will be free of The Monster, but that Quentin will be, too.

Then the whole crew, equipped with everything they’ll need to pull the Monster out of Eliot, head through the breach.

BLACKOUT.


INT. THE LIBRARY CONFERENCE ROOM

The whole room is covered in atlases, maps, and books. They’re turning their pages seemingly on their own and locator spells are working actively on all the maps, searching for any sign of The Monster. EVERETT is scouring all of time and space to find what he wants. A LIBRARIAN enters, bringing more books. Even this librarian seems uncomfortable with the energy radiating off of Everett, who is pacing the room.

EVERETT

Where are you?

BLACKOUT.


END OF 04.13.