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he grabs me (he has me by my heart)

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It starts with a glance. A stupid, shared look across a crowded room. He looks away before he can think, a blush rising on his cheeks as if he is back in high school. When he looked back up, those eyes are still boring into him like his never left.

They’re at a party, held by Tony, the reason: unknown. Steve has known Tony long enough to be aware that there is always a reason to hold a party.

He’s standing against the wall, nursing a warm beer. He doesn’t know what drove him to look across the room like that. Or what made him keep looking. Or what makes him almost spit out his warm beer when he sees him weaving his way through the sea of people.

It continues with a drink. Handed to him with a smirk.

“Asgardian?” Steve asks.

“Only the best,” is the reply.

Loki eyes him as he takes a swig. It’s sweet and earthy, nothing like what he is used to. The alcohol warms his insides; something he doesn’t often feel with the regular alcohol provided at these kind of things. He blushes again when he catches Loki looking at him and he forces himself to look elsewhere.

Everyone has a drink in their hand. Bucky and Sam are across the party, both chugging beer. Sam is drunk. Bucky, like Steve, can’t even get drunk, but he’s having a good time. Steve can see it on his face. It’s been a long time coming. Bucky’s had a hard life and seeing him throw his head back laughing, it makes everything they’ve been through worth it.

“Your boyfriend is having a good night,” Loki says quietly.

Steve blinks, looking back at the God. “What?” he asks.

“The soldier,” Loki clarifies.

Steve laughs, “Bucky? He isn’t my boyfriend.” Loki raises an eyebrow. “He’s my friend. That’s all.”

“Pardon me, then,” Loki drinks. It’s something in a long champagne flute. It’s purple and smoking. “So, I was under the impression you were one of the more popular Avengers, even more so than my brother.”

“Maybe on Earth,” Steve says. Awkwardly.

“And yet,” Loki continues, “here you stand alone in a room full of people. Why is that?”

Steve drinks more. He’s starting to feel the effects of the alcohol in his system. It never takes the Asgardian ale long to do that. Steve remembers that night back before Ultron, Thor had shared some with him and it was the last time Steve fought drunk.

“Captain?” Loki says, with a slight frown beginning.

“I’m not,” Steve swallows. “Alone, I mean. You’re here.”

Loki laughs, and not the kind Steve is used to hearing. It’s a relaxed, careless laugh, his guard is down. And Steve can’t take his eyes away from him and finds himself laughing, too. When Loki stops, he’s leaning into Steve. He can feel the body heat radiating off of the Asgardian, even through the fabric of his suit. Something shifts and Steve can’t take his eyes off of him. The perfect fit of his black suit, his slicked back hair, the curve of his lips.

“Steve?” Bucky’s voice cuts through Steve’s thoughts.

He turns, Bucky is standing a few feet away, eyeing Steve and Loki carefully.

Steve clears his throat. “Yeah Buck?”

“I just wanted to let you know I’m heading out,” Bucky tells him. “I’m going to drive Sam back to his place and then go home. You need a ride?”

“Um,” Steve hesitates. When did it get so hot in here? He’s sweating, he can feel droplets forming at his hairline.

“No,” Loki speaks. “I’ll ensure the Captain finds his way home.”

Steve’s eyes widen, and Bucky stares at Loki, his brow furrowing, before looking to Steve for clarification.

“It’s fine, Buck,” Steve says, his voice no more than a squeak. “You go on ahead.”

Bucky blinks. “Text me when you get home, please.”

“Yeah, I will,” Steve manages a smile before Bucky shifts his gaze back to Loki, and leaves. Steve watches Bucky get to Sam and whispers something. Sam looks across the room, a bewildered expression on his face.

“Are you sure you two are not together?” Loki turns to him. “He seems… concerned for your well-being.”

Steve sighs, “He’s my friend.”

Loki sips his drink, it’s almost empty, and raises his eyebrow. “If you say so.”

“You know how it is,” Steve shrugs, “we’ve known each other forever. We care about each other. He’s my brother.”

“Thor does not look at me like that and I am fairly certain I do not look at him like that,” Loki drinks again, the flute is empty. Steve watches him lick the purple drink from his lips - for a second, he sees the stain the drink has left behind on Loki’s tongue. For an even briefer second, he wonders if he can taste Loki’s drink on his tongue.

Steve coughs, chugs his drink and breathes in deeply.

“Are you alright?” Loki asks him. His free hand comes up to rest on Steve’s bicep.

“I-I, uh, I’m,” he stops. His heart pounds against his ribcage. It has to be the alcohol in his system. There is no way he would be feeling this way if he were sober. He has never looked at Loki with anything other than disgust or indifference. It has to be whatever is in this drink no , he was looking across the room at Loki before he had the drink.

Steve wets his lips and says, “I’m looking at you,” before he can stop himself.

Loki’s mouth fall opens slightly, his guard coming down even further. Steve sees a shift in Loki’s eyes, they twinkle with mischief and a grin rises on his lips.

“Is that so?” Loki moves in closer, so close Steve can feel his lips against the shell of his ear. God, he is just radiating heat. “Tell me,” Loki’s grip tightens on Steve’s bicep, “have you ever fucked your Bucky?”

Steve sucks in air. “No, we’re just —”

Friends ,” Loki chuckles, “so you’ve said. Is that what we are, Steven? Friends?”

He can’t answer. Not with Loki mouthing at the skin below his ear. Fuck , they need to move somewhere else. All of their colleagues are in this room. Sure Bucky and Sam have left, but last time Steve checked, Loki’s brother was making rounds and Tony has a talent for making unwelcome appearances.

“Loki,” Steve says and pushes the man away slightly.

“Is there a problem?” Loki asks, still grinning, but Steve can see hesitation.

“No, but we should,” he swallows, “leave.”


Loki places his champagne flute down on a table nearby and takes Steve’s hand in his. He tugs him through the party. In the back of his mind, Steve thinks that the reason why they are leaving is for privacy but with Loki dragging him through crowds of people; everyone can see them together.

It should make him feel ashamed - being seen doing something like this, with Loki , of all people. But all he can think about is finally getting alone with the God.

He doesn’t ask how Loki knows his way around the compound, because the farther Loki takes him, the quieter the party gets. Eventually, Loki throws open a door and they’re finally, all alone, in a room with a bed.

God, what has he gotten himself into?

Loki must see his panic. The mischief fades from his face and he almost looks concerned.

“Steven,” Loki whispers. “Are you sure about this?”

Is he?

He’s only had sex with a handful of people. Peggy, Bucky — yes, Bucky — and Sharon, once. Never the God of Mischief, who has lived for thousands of years and could have anyone in the cosmos. And he is here with Steve. Should he be upset Loki chose him? Is he in this room with Loki because he was there and willing?

Steve feels Loki touch his cheek. His fingertips are cold and the touch is gentle. He almost feels calm, despite his rapidly beating heart.

“You don’t have to do this, if you don’t want to,” Loki murmurs.

“I want to,” Steve says in reply.

Loki leans in slowly, “This is all right?”

Their lips are touching by the time Steve manages a quiet, “Yes.”

They kiss like this for a while and it doesn’t take long before Steve finds out that, yes, he can taste Loki’s drink. It tastes like berries and candy. Steve reaches up and threads his fingers through Loki’s hair; grounding himself. Loki’s hands are on Steve’s hips and he pulls Steve closer with each minute that passes, until there is no space between their chests.

When Loki pulls away, Steve whines and chases after him, making Loki laugh.

“You’re cute, are you aware of that?”

“I’ve been called worse.” Steve shrugs.

“Come,” Loki takes Steve’s hand and takes him to the bed. He pushes Steve down onto his back and straddles Steve’s lap. Steve watches Loki take off his suit jacket and the black dress shirt beneath; revealing the pale expanse of his chest. He wants to reach up and touch, but hesitates. He keeps his hands on the bed, instead. “You can touch me, if you wish,” Loki says with a smirk.

Steve grabs Loki’s hips and Loki’s eyes close slightly, his breath hitching and hips rocking ever so slightly.

It is this, that makes Steve through caution to the wind. All apprehension he has is gone. If Loki chose him because he was the only one in the room, he doesn’t care. He has a God sitting on his lap, rocking against him, letting out the softest of moans.

“God, look at you,” Steve murmurs, letting his hands roam Loki’s body. He sits up, kissing the soft flesh. Loki throws his neck back when Steve’s lips brush his nipples; making Steve smile. “You’re gorgeous, Loki.”

Loki tugs at Steve’s suit jacket and whines. Eventually, Steve gets the message. He stops his ministrations - pausing only slightly to admire the small bruises already scattering themselves across Loki’s chest. Steve takes off his jacket, then his shirt and tries not to let his ego get any bigger when Loki stares at him.

When their eyes meet once more, Loki kisses him hard. Steve is powerless to him and lets Loki just take .

“I want you,” Loki breathes again him. “Please.”

Steve grips Loki’s body and flips them over, pinning Loki to the bed. Loki’s hair spreads across the white pillow beneath him and God, Steve has never been this turned on in his life.

“What do you want from me, Loki?” Steve mouths at Loki’s neck, sucking until his neck is covered in little marks - matching his chest. Steve doesn’t have a thing for marking, but the red against Loki’s pale skin, shit it’s good.

Loki wets his lips and presses himself against Steve, “You know what I want—”

A fist bangs loudly on the door and they both go stiff.

“Hey, Cap?” It’s Tony. “You in there?”

Steve clears his throat, “Yeah, Tony, what’s up?”

“You seen Loki? Thor’s looking for him and someone said they saw you with him a while ago,” Tony says through the door.

Steve rests his forehead against Loki’s shoulder, “No, I haven’t seen him—”

“I saw him leave,” Steve hears himself say and in an instant, he sits up and sees himself beneath him. “He looked like he was in a mood.”

“Ah, really?” Tony sighs loudly. “Hey Thor! Cap says Loki left in a mood.”

Distantly, Steve hears Thor groan.

“Alright,” Tony knocks on the door slightly. “Thanks Cap. By the way, if you and Barnes stain my sheets you’re getting the bill.”

Steve squeezes his eyes shut. Tony and his big fucking mouth—

“I’ll just use his mouth then,” now Bucky is beneath him and Steve cannot handle this.

Tony swears and they hear him storm off. The next thing he knows, Loki is back beneath him and smiling at him, that mischief is back.

“Just friends with the soldier, then?”

In the past, Steve never knew a way to get Loki to shut up.

He does now.