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Language:
English
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Published:
2019-05-10
Updated:
2019-07-24
Words:
14,238
Chapters:
6/?
Comments:
61
Kudos:
265
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disparate youth

Summary:

this is a "what if" that turned into a monster:
what if beth and rio were around the same age?
what if they both went to high school in detroit?
what if they met as teens and their chemistry was off the charts?
what if he wasn't always cagey and secretive?
what if - for just a short time - she didn't put everyone else first?
------

titles from songs featured in the show because this soundtrack is amazing.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Chapter 1: mixed-up, shook-up girl

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

the alarm blares,  beth groans,  and reluctantly throws the covers off of her body,  already mourning the loss of the comfortable warmth that had existed moments before. 

6:08am. she'd started to set it that way because if it went off at 6, she'd hit snooze until quarter after, and she'd barely get out of the house on time. 6:08 meant no snooze, and just enough time to get ready and go.

"time to get up!"  she calls too loudly as she throws on the light in annie's room.  the younger girl yells in protest,  but beth can already see her stirring, and is confident enough that she'll get up on her own.

by the time her sister appears in the kitchen, she's far more alert than when beth left her in the bedroom,  and she sits at the table where cereal is already waiting.  beth is dressed in jeans and a light sweater,  her hair pulled up in a ponytail,  and she's still trying to shake the sleep from her limbs.

it's been like this for a while now,  beth taking care of the morning routine -  all of the routines,  really - and it's as though a constant state of exhaustion looms over her around every turn.  she tamps it down by throwing herself into it - their routine,  her schoolwork,  everything.  their mother hasn't been an active part of raising them since she got sick  ( or at least, that's what  beth  calls it in her head, but really she just seems tired all. of. the. time. ),  and so it had fallen on beth to pick up the slack.  "don't forget you have scouts after school,"  she murmurs into a cup of coffee.  it tastes  gross  and bitter,  but with a little bit of sugar and a lot of milk it's palatable - and necessary to get her through the day.

"no, i'm quitting,"  annie replies matter-of-factly as she gets up to rinse her bowl out in the sink.  beth doesn't have the energy to argue,  and figures they can table it for later.  they have to leave soon if she's going to have time to walk annie to school and get to homeroom in time, anyway.  she rinses her mug,  washes her hands,  and grabs her backpack from where it sits on one of the chairs. 

"shoes,"  she reminds, looking pointedly down at her sister's feet.  this earns her a giggle, and beth rolls her eyes but has to laugh a little in return.


 when she gets to school,  dean is already waiting by her locker in a group with his friends, and he's wearing a grin so wide it makes her blush. 

she'd never expected a senior to be interested in her,  but they've been almost inseparable for weeks. 

"bethie!"   she catches the way his friends roll their eyes,  probably equally confused as to why he'd want to spend his time with a sophomore,  but they don't say anything before dispersing,  leaving the two of them alone.  she barely has time to drop her books in her locker before he's caging her in,  fingers toying with the hem of her sweater, and beth has to lean her head back against the locker to look up at him. 

"dean,"  she hisses in warning,  but her tone is playful and not annoyed.  "we're in the hallway,  we'll get in trouble."   he isn't even really touching her,  but the intent is implied,  and it makes her nervous and a little bit uncomfortable.   just jitters,  she tells herself,  jitters she'll need to get over before prom in a couple of weeks - beth knows what it means, what people  do  after prom,   what dean expects.  she has to be ready.

she's definitely not ready. 

"c'mon bethie,"   he murmurs against her ear, and she laughs a little breathlessly,  a firm hand against his chest. 

"i have to get to homeroom, i'll see you after third, okay?"   she presses a chaste kiss to his lips,  and dean groans in quiet frustration,  but it's enough of a distraction that she slips under his arm and makes her escape,  smiling sweetly at him over her shoulder.

no, she's  definitely  not ready.


 

homeroom is uneventful.  morning announcements remind everyone that the prom committee is still looking for volunteers to stay after school and help with planning.  normally this would be right up beth's alley,  but she doesn't have time with all of the responsibilities at home,  and besides - lower classmen usually get the leftover jobs that no one wants after the juniors and seniors take their pick.  she sighs,  distracted,  and makes a note in her planner to talk to annie's scout leader later,  see if she can find out why she wants to quit.

there's a pop quiz in bio.  she's as prepared as she can be,  but it still settles uncomfortably,  making her feel like something isn't right.  she smothers the feeling down,  dutifully filling out the multiple choice bubbles and handing the paper in with a smile once she's done.  her chest feels tight,  but beth ignores it,  opening her book to the unit they've been working on,  and perusing the next part while a few stragglers finished their quizzes. 

she doesn't even realize she's started to doze off until someone moves their desk and the metal against linoleum makes a scraping sound so loud that it  startles  her.   no one seems to notice that she'd been falling asleep,  and she forces herself to refocus on the words in the book,  finding the part the teacher was referring to as she wrote notes on the chalkboard.   she  really  needs to get it together.  that pressure in her chest is growing,  and she doesn't know what it is or how to stop it---

so she ignores it again.


 

dean's waiting for her again,  his friends standing around in a semi circle,  and she has to say excuse me -  twice - to jessica  ( one of dean's teammate's girlfriends )  before she takes notice and shifts enough to let beth pass so that she can trade out her books.  she stifles a huff at the girl,  her rudeness,  and the general look of  judgment  she gets from her at any given time.  dean doesn't seem to notice,  and he slings an arm around beth,  leaning to whisper in her ear. 

"so we were talking about getting a  hotel  for after prom."   even though he speaks quietly, it's obvious by the roll of jessica's eyes that she hears and doesn't exactly care for the idea - or maybe just the idea of beth being there - and beth flushes,  in part out of frustration and in part because she knows what this  means

"i don't know, dean."   he wears a smile that she knows is just the prelude to whatever sales pitch he has ready - like father like son, apparently - but he's cut off by jessica's annoyance. 

"i  told  you, she doesn't want to come - and honestly  deansie,"   there's a pout on the other girl's lips that twists something inside of beth, and she shoots her a glare that goes unnoticed. 

"she's like  ---a child,  why would you want to take  her  anyway,  she probably has curfew."  

beth does not have curfew, mostly because her mother would never notice enough to enforce it,  but she doesn't say that,  just turns redder than before.  

dean is already coming to her defense when beth shrugs off his arm.

"i'm gonna head to the library before english,"  she tells him,  turning her back toward jessica and the others,  and ignoring the outburst entirely.  she's feeling on the verge of something terrible, like dread is unfurling within her, and she just needs to get  away

beth doesn't kiss him this time,  just heads toward the library,  leaving dean staring open mouthed behind her.  she can hear him chastising jessica in quiet tones, but beth can't make out the words, and she doesn't care.

 


 

it comes crashing down during sixth period algebra - the feeling that has been threatening to suffocate her all day.  it had started as a light pressure in her chest, but now it's grown into this monster that can't be ignored.  she'd been writing down formulas,  her mind wandering to the things she has to do after school, the rest she has to do tomorrow,  the prom committee she can't be on,  the plans dean wants to make for prom,  his friends and their disapproval of her,  the hotel. 

she gulps for air,  feeling like she can't get her lungs full enough, and she doesn't realize how bad it is until she's almost gasping with the effort.

before she knows it,  beth is walking swiftly for the door of the classroom,  paying no mind to the way she's not poised and in control like she normally is.  the teacher doesn't ask questions - she's a straight A student,  after all,  likely that she needs a bathroom break,  not that she'd be getting into any kind of trouble. 

of course,  the bathroom down the hall is occupied,  and as soon as she walks in and hears the chatting of two girls beyond her line of vision,  beth whirls around and heads in the other direction.

air, she needs air,  and the insistence of it is upon her like a weight on her chest.

students aren't allowed to go outside during class time,  but beth only gives it a passing thought before pressing on the handle of the heavy door that leads outside,  and rushing out into the fresh air.  

she breathes,  deep and calming breaths,  and her lungs seem to thank her almost immediately,  but she still finds herself coughing  -  it had been too much,  too fast - leaning over with her hands on her knees.

"shouldn't you be in class?" 

the voice startles her,  and she jumps halfway out of her skin,  looking up to see a boy about her age - but one she's never seen before - leaning against the wall next to the doors she'd just come out through.

"shouldn't you?"   she retorts in a raw voice,  another bout of coughing taking over. 

"nah,  i don't go here,"   he says casually,  as if it makes all the sense in the world that he'd be leaning against the building of a school he doesn't attend.   she'd roll her eyes if she had the energy.  he steps closer,  suddenly,  and beth steps back. 

"relax,  sweetheart,.  need to straighten up,  put your hands up - open your diaphragm."    he stops his approach,  but straightens his own spine,  pressing his hands to the top of his head in demonstration,  and takes a deep breath.  beth follows suit. 

"i feel ridiculous,"   she says,  scowling. 

"sure,  but  you ain't coughing no more, huh?"  

she isn't,  beth realizes, and she gapes at him,  stuck somewhere between asking him what he's doing at her school if he doesn't go there and thanking him for the tip.   she doesn't get the chance to do either,  and something tells her he's attuned to the inner struggle going on.

he smirks at her,  nodding. 

"yeah - see you 'round,  sweetheart."

 

she doesn't realize she's blushing until he's disappeared around the corner.

Notes:

this chapter focuses mostly on beth and annie as well as beth and dean - don't worry, i promise it's a brio fic.

i wrote this on my phone with minimal editing/proofreading so please forgive any errors <3