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Creep

Chapter Text

Chloe gave a slightly nervous smile to the bouncer as he let her into Lux, still unsure as to whether this was a good idea. It had been a few weeks since she last saw him, and his face turned her world upside down. She skulked round the edge of the club, looking out for him while trying not to let him see her. After a minute, she spotted him sat at the piano in the middle of the club, and as if on cue, the music faded out as he began to play.

He played a few upbeat pop songs, technically perfect but lacking something she couldn't quite put her finger on, before his playing slowed, taking on a slightly melancholy feel before he started to sing.

"When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry"

Despite the packed club, Chloe felt like she was intruding on a private moment, everything except him and the piano fading out as the music slowly built.

"I don't care if it hurts
I want to have control
I want a perfect body
I want a perfect soul

I want you to notice
When I'm not around
You're so very special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here."

His playing reached a climax, everybody in the club utterly entranced, before the volume suddenly dropped as he hunched over the keys. His voice quieted too, still clear and perfectly pitched, but a undercurrent of pain to his words.

"Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so very special
I wish I was special

But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo,
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here.
I don't belong here."

As the last chord faded out, he sat perfectly still, head bowed over the keys, and time seemed to stop for a moment before the DJ took the hint that the set was over and brought the music back. As heavy bass began to pump through the club, Chloe turned and left, feeling unable to process her emotions in the suddenly claustrophobic atmosphere of Lux as everyone began to dance again.

She didn't notice Lucifer turn, and the broken expression on his face as he watched her leave.

Chapter Text

Lucifer noticed her the second she stepped through the door. She looked just as stunning as he remembered, but there was fear in her movements and her furtive glances around the club. He knew she was looking for him, whether to avoid him or seek him out he didn’t know, but he didn’t approach or even look openly in her direction, afraid that she would turn tail and run if he did so. Settling at the piano, he saw her notice him and settle in to watch as he began to play.

He started with the upbeat pop songs he usually played, but his heart wasn't in it. After a few, he gave up on them and began to play the opening chords to Creep, the song almost perfectly encapsulating his feelings, and he hoped she'd hear and understand what he wanted to say to her. He watched her out of the corner of his eye as he began to sing, musing over the lyrics as they flowed like honey from his lips.

"When you were here before
Couldn't look you in the eye
You're just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry"

That wasn't quite true, she was better than any of his siblings could ever be, but the comparison to humanity’s perception of them was almost perfect.

"But I'm a creep, I'm a weirdo.
What the hell am I doing here?
I don't belong here."

That was true. He was a monster, and the only reason he was still in LA was Linda had made him promise not to leave without talking to her, and he couldn't bring himself to risk seeing her fear again.

"She's running out again,
She's running out
She's run run run run"

He was afraid she would run, as soon as she came to her senses and realised she couldn't be near him, but it wouldn't be running again for her. At the loft, when he'd realised what she was seeing, he was the one who had run, fleeing before she had a chance to reject him.

"Whatever makes you happy
Whatever you want
You're so very special
I wish I was special"

That was the crux of the matter. Above all else, he wanted her to be happy, but he was selfish and wanted that happiness to include him. And she was special, there was no question of that. Who else but her could have weaselled their way past his defences and made the Devil feel?

As he played the last chord, he let his head drop as he hunched over the keys, not wanting her to see the emotion in his face. The night’s DJ started up the music soon after, registering that his set was over, and a moment after that he screwed up the courage to seek her out in the crowd. As he looked to where she had been standing, he caught a glimpse of her retreating back fleeing the club, and his heart broke.

After a moment, he pulled himself up and retreated to his penthouse, ignoring all the partygoers clamouring for his attention as he walked to the lift.

When he reached his penthouse, he went straight to the bar and poured himself a drink, beginning to fear that he would be trapped in a Hell loop on Earth, kept in a cycle of day drinking and meaningless club nights by his promise to Linda and the fear of her rejection.

He sat at his piano, picking out the opening bars to several pieces but not finding one that adequately expressed his feelings, and didn’t notice the lift arriving until its occupant spoke.

Chapter Text

"Um, Boss? I’ve got a message for you." The speaker was one of his newer hires, a bouncer who could deal with anything the night threw at him, but still got nervous talking to him despite the many reassurances of his coworkers that Lucifer would only get angry if you did something truly awful.

"What is it, Jacob?" Lucifer asked, not bothering to turn around and continuing to brush his fingers over the keys.

"Detective Decker was here earlier, and she asked me to deliver this to you personally, and take her your response, Boss." He nervously made his way over to the piano, and handed Lucifer a folded piece of paper, his name written on the outside in her handwriting.

Lucifer

I want to start by saying I’m not scared of you, but all this is still a lot for me to handle. I thought I could see you tonight and maybe talk afterwards, but when I saw you and heard you play, I realised I still needed some space. I hope I can see you properly soon, and I hope you’re alright.

Chloe

For a moment he sat there, torn between relief that she hadn’t been driven mad, and the guilty feeling that she was still suffering because of him. Once he was certain he wouldn’t embarrass himself in front of Jacob, he got up to fetch a piece of paper and a pen, and composed his reply. After it was completed, he handed the folded note to Jacob, hoping he would see Chloe again soon.

-----------------*-----------------

Chloe waited slightly nervously outside while Jacob took her message to hi- to Lucifer. It was taking longer than she thought, but she guessed that he was probably thinking over how to reply. She was just wondering whether she should brace herself and go back in when he returned.

"Here’s the Boss’s reply, Detective Decker. Do you need me for anything else?" He asked as he handed her a folded piece of paper, 'Detective' written in Lucifer’s smooth cursive on the outside.

"Nothing else, thank you, Jacob."

"Have a good night, Detective."

She toyed with the edge of the paper for a moment, suddenly slightly afraid of what he might have written, before screwing up her courage and opening it.

Detective

I am glad you are alright. I understand that you need space, but know that I will always be willing to try and answer your questions, whether that be in person, on the phone, or by text. If you need someone human to talk to, see Doctor Linda, and don’t worry about any expense, it will be covered.

Thank you, Chloe.

Lucifer

There was a small smile on her face as she walked to her car, glad that he understood and was still willing to talk to her. Tomorrow she would call Linda, and hopefully it wouldn't be long before she could talk to him face-to-face.