If Steve had to pick one thing about his Omega that drove him absolutely crazy, it was Bucky’s sheer inability to tell Steve when something was wrong. Bucky would never tell Steve when he was having a bad day, he’d never look at his Alpha and explain that his stomach hurt, or that he’d rolled his ankle on the subway. Instead he’d get overly affectionate, slinging an arm over Steve’s tiny shoulders when they walked down the street, or wrapping his arms around his waist from behind when he was cooking. At the beginning of their relationship Steve had been terrified that he wouldn’t be able to properly provide for him. He was so weak he couldn’t even pop a knot. But Bucky never cared, they had toys to help with heats and as far as Bucky was concerned as long as Steve was close, he was happy. So if Steve had to do a little more detective work when his Omega was sick, then so be it. He could do that.
However, Bucky’s favourite thing to do when he wasn’t well was nest. After a long day down at the docs, the first thing he would do was shower and pull all of their blankets into the centre of the bed, grabbing Steve away from whatever he was doing and wrapping around him like an octopus while they quietly talked about their day. Bucky never said it, and Steve never asked, but they both knew just how hard it was for Bucky to be working down at the docks as a Bonded Omega. The taunting and ridicule he’d constantly have to deal with always left a mark. Steve hated it, but they were happy. It wasn’t always easy, and Steve got sick way too much. But they had a good life.
Then the war hit the States.
Bucky’d wanted nothing to do with it, and the first time he’d found out Steve had lied on his enlistment form the high-pitched whine he’d let out combined with the sheer anguish in his scent had sent Steve reeling. It had taken him days to get Bucky out of his nest, trying to assure the Omega’s hindbrain that he wasn’t trying to get away from him. He’d finally lured him out with the promise that he would only go and apply with Bucky. Steve had figured it was an easy promise, no one in their right mind would send a bonded Omega into an active combat zone.
Steve was horrified when Bucky received his acceptance, and a prescription for suppressants.
At first, Bucky’d tried to make light of it, cracking jokes about how Steve would have to beat other Omegas away with sticks while he was gone. Steve had growled and pitched his Alpha voice low at the bad joke, letting Bucky know just how not funny he was. Bucky’d stopped pretending to be okay after that. Becoming more and more tactile as his countdown began, holding his hand in public, curling into his lap while they listened to the radio. Steve tried to act bravely, but his heart was breaking.
The night before he left Steve had done everything he could to provide for his Omega one last time. Riddling the poor soldier’s senses with Alpha commands of being safe, and not running into a fight he wasn’t sure he could win. Instead of making jokes, Bucky had crawled up into his lap and nuzzled him, murmuring soft yes Alpha responses to each command. Steve had dragged his feet to the train station the next day, masking his own scent with Bucky’s increasing inability to hide how scared he was. The suppressants had worked beautifully, but Steve knew his Bucky, his scent glands could be completely removed and Steve would still know his Bucky.
He pulled him into a tight hug and whispered into his ear.
“You be brave Buck, and leave a few Nazis for me yeah? I’ll come find you soon okay?” Bucky’d nodded shakily into his shoulder, normal bravado completely gone in the face of his impending reality.
“I love you okay? So brave Buck, I’m gunna come get you okay? You stay away from those unbonded Alphas, no need to find more trouble” Bucky pulled away and blinked the tears threatening to spill over. Steve gave him a sad smile as Bucky cleared his throat.
“M’still yours right? Even if I go away?” Steve sighed and looked up at him with soft eyes. It spoke volumes that Bucky was so worried that he would actually vocalize his fears, even if it was in a slightly roundabout way.
“Yeah baby, you’re still mine, and I’m still yours okay? And m’gunna come find you” Bucky nodded and flinched as the whistle blew, throwing his arms around Steve again.
“I don’t wanna go” Steve almost lost his composure at the murmured confession, instead scenting him gently and letting out what he hoped was a soothing growl.
“I know, I know you don’t sweetheart. But I’ll be there soon okay? I promise, Gunna do everything I can to come find ya” Bucky nodded, and Steve appreciated the fact that Bucky never once questioned his inability to actually be accepted.
The way he’d clung to Steve’s hand right up until he was on the train and it started to move haunted the blonde for hours.
“I don’t like bullies sir, I don’t care where they come from” Erskine looked at him and his eyes caught the Bond Mark on his neck.
“And what does your mate think of your impulsive need to get to Germany hmm?” Steve swallowed thickly and gripped the side of the bed.
“My mate is the reason I need to get to Germany sir” Erskine let out a long sigh and closed his eyes as he realized what Steve meant.
“Well, we best get you ready to go then, shouldn’t we?” Steve perked up and gaped at him.
“T-thank you, thank you sir” Erskine smiled and gestured to his neck.
“I would cover that up if I were you though, these soldiers are a certain breed” Steve nodded and jumped to his feet, following Erskine out the door and into his new life.
Bucky learned a lot about himself in Europe. But the number one thing he’d learned was the importance of being able to vocalize his needs.
However, the only need he couldn’t vocalize was the need for Steve. He missed his Alpha, missed how he never really had to say anything and Steve just knew. It hurt more than words could say that his Alpha wasn’t there with him, and as he continuously touched his Bond Mark while in the muddy fields, or while curled up in fox holes, all Bucky could wish for was that his love was still safe, still thriving.
So when Bucky jerked awake at one-thirty in the morning grabbing at his neck and screaming in pain. There was little anyone could say to console the distraught Omega. The Mark turning an ugly black and beginning to fester as he began to claw at it. Bucky’s fellow sergeant, Timothy “Dum Dum” Dugan lurched forward and grabbed the hysterical Omega as he continued to rock himself back and forth.
“What’s wrong with it!? You have to fix it!” Dum Dum felt dread as he looked at the Mark with heartbroken eyes.
Bucky’s Alpha was dead.
Steve couldn’t believe it. He was an Alpha, a true Alpha. His new body was big and strong, he could see in colour, he could hear perfectly. It was per-
“What?!” Steve began to fiercely rub at his neck, eyes widening in horror at his reflection. He began shaking as he began to claw at his neck, praying it was just makeup, it had to be.
But it wasn’t.
Bucky’s Bond Mark was gone.
Steve tore through the room to one of the nurses.
“Hey! What did this do, I have no marks!” the nurse looked at him nervously and bit her lip, her whole body radiated scared Beta at his enraged tone.
“T-the serum heals from all wounds sir, i-it would heal over any scars” Steve faltered and grabbed his neck, heartbreak beginning to take hold as he realized the heart wrenching reality.
He was technically unbonded.
Bucky would be devastated.
“Steve? Is everything okay?” Steve whipped around as Agent Peggy Carter looked at him, her scent immediately giving off how interested she was in him and he swallowed thickly.
“Y-yes ma’am, just adjusting I suppose” she smiled kindly and nodded.
“Well, best put a shirt on, we have to get moving quickly” he nodded as she walked out and sighed heavily. All he had to do was play dancing monkey until he got to Europe, then he could find Bucky and get his mark back.
Just the idea of it made him relax.
“Don’t be too hard on them” Steve sighed heavily as he continued his sketch of a monkey on a unicycle and shrugged. Peggy came and sat next to him, her scent invading his senses as she pulled her hair back.
Steve wouldn’t lie, he was incredibly flattered by Peggy’s attention, really all the attention he had received from various Betas and Omegas, even a few Alphas had sniffed his way. It was all very flattering and was really good for his esteem. But they weren’t his Omega. Bucky’s attention was all the attention he ever wanted or needed. He wasn’t even paying attention to Peggy until her last sentence.
“These men are what’s left of the 107th” Steve snapped up and gaped at her.
“W-what?” she looked at him, likely confused from his distressed scent and tone as he rushed around the corner and off to find colonel Phillips.
“Steve! Steve slow down, what’s going on!?” Steve had tunnel vision as he rushed into the tent, interrupting Phillips mid sentence as he stormed up to his desk.
“Excuse me sir, I need you to look at a name for me” Colonel Phillips tried to brush him off and he let out a low Alpha growl.
“The name is James Buchanan Barnes sir, B-A-R-“ Phillips rolled his eyes and looked him.
“I’ve signed more of these letters than I care to admit, but that name does ring a bell, I’m sorry-“ Steve’s vision whited out and a long, low moan escaped him. The older Alpha’s eyes flared as he caught the distraught scent.
“We need to mount a rescue mission” Phillips shook his head.
“I’m sorry, I can’t risk it-“ he was still talking, but Steve was already plotting. He had to find his mate.
“Barnes, James Buchanan. Sergeant. 3-2-5-5-7-0-3-8” Steve rounded the corner at a quick pace, he could smell him, he had to be close. He could still hear the released soldiers storming through the HYDRA base, but he didn’t care about them right now. He wasn’t leaving without Bucky.
“Bucky! Oh my God” Steve faltered as he entered the room. Bucky was strapped to the exam table in the centre of the room, his whole body was trembling and his glazed, unseeing eyes were focused on the ceiling as he repeated his name and rank over and over, just as they would have trained him to.
“Buck- hey, sweetheart can you hear me, it’s me, it’s Steve” the glazed eyes slowly came into focus and Bucky stared at him for a moment as a slow smile broke across his face.
“Steve…?” Steve smiled and stroked his hair lovingly.
“Yeah, yeah honey it’s me. Let’s get you outta here yeah?” Bucky nodded, eyes still focused on him as Steve ripped the restraints off, pulling him to his feet and framing his face. Bucky clung to his broad shoulders and for the first time in a long time Steve felt like a true Alpha. He raked his eyes over the Omega for any signs of injury as he murmured softly.
“I thought you were dead”
“I thought you were smaller” Steve wanted to scent him, get the awful smell of other Alphas and gunpowder and blood off of him but the loud bang of the base beginning to self destruct reminded him that now wasn’t the time.
“C’mon, we gotta go” Bucky tried to keep up, but he was weak, and Steve’s Alpha heart was bleeding at how much pain his mate was in, and the fact that in this moment he couldn’t do anything about it. Steve led Bucky up the metal stairs to the only exit they could find, they began to start across the bridge when two men turned the corner.
“Ah, Captain America” Steve barely had time to react before Bucky was pulling him back across the bridge away from them. Steve almost gagged with the sudden overwhelming scent of terror Bucky was letting off as the smaller man pulled a lever, separating the two as the bridge retracted. Schmidt removed his face to reveal the Red Skull and Bucky let out a soft whine and Steve’s heart broke.
“You don’t have one of those do you?” Steve chanced a quick look at his mate and found his concern skyrocketing as he realized Bucky was barely paying Schmidt any mind, eyes instead trained on the mousey little Omega next to him. Steve logged that away to address later as the two took off and his main priority became to get Bucky out of the base before it collapsed on top of them. He guided Bucky over to a fallen beam balanced against the two landings. Steve tried to sound confident as he gently guided the brunette towards the beam.
“Okay here, you first” Bucky nodded and slowly stumbled his way across the beam, every wobble making Steve’s heart freeze. The beam let out a cruel groan and Bucky just barely jumped the distance to land safely on the other side. The two froze and Bucky began to desperately glance around as Steve heard the building supports groan again.
“Just get out of here! Go!”
“No! Not without you!” Steve felt his body give a low growl at the desperate tone in his mate’s voice as Bucky grabbed the railing, swinging back a little with a pained expression.
“Alpha please, there’s gotta be a rope or something!” Steve looked around him and began pacing, rushing his legs faster and faster as panic began to-
“Step back!” Bucky immediately followed the command and Steve took a deep breath as he suddenly charged at the chasm, leaping into the air as one of the large containers exploded underneath him…
“Let’s hear it for Captain America!” Steve smirked at Bucky who grinned blindingly at him, adoration and pride in his eyes. Suddenly Peggy came out of nowhere and Steve watched Bucky bristle, immediately smelling Peggy’s interested scent that Steve always tried to ignore.
“Phillips wants to see you, that was some stunt you pulled” he watched out of the corner of his eye as Bucky began to push his way back through the crowd towards him, always the possessive type. Steve scratched the back of his neck self-consciously as the mob dispersed when suddenly a horrific high-pitched wail tore through the air.
Peggy and Steve immediately swung their gazes over to Bucky, his scent filling Steve with a terrified sense of alarm he’d never had before. Steve had never heard such a gut-wrenching, blood-curdling sound and immediately advanced on his mate, needing to protect him from whatever was causing him so much pain, only for Bucky to scramble away from him so fast he fell backwards into the dirt. Bucky, who was gazing in sheer horror at Steve’s neck.
Steve’s markless neck.
“Bucky?” Steve whispered as he entered the medical tent, Bucky’s suppressants had worn off while he was held captive and now he was in special quarantine while they tried to attend his injuries. The only problem was the medical staff couldn’t get any information out of him. Bucky’d gone catatonic.
Steve had to stop in the doorway as the horrible, acrid stench of his mate permeated the room. He was beginning to make out what the different scents were, although he’d never smelt them all at once.
Rejection, loss, illness, fear, loneliness, heartbreak, shame. Steve had smelt them all on his mate at one point or another and hated each and every instance. But the fact that he was smelling all of them at once, and that it was Steve’s fault.
Well, he could hardly bear it.
He slid into the room and looked over at him. Bucky was curled up against the wall on the floor, wrapped in the thin army issued blankets. Steve felt his heart break a little more, he was trying to nest. Trying to comfort himself. Steve slowly walked into the room and watched as Bucky pressed back further against the wall and he let out a slow, low rumble. He heard Bucky whimper and watched tears slide down his face as he reached up to scratch at his own mating mark, still clear as day and infected.
“Bucky, can I come in?” Bucky shook his head rapidly and let out a sob.
“Please sweetheart, let your Alpha explain” Bucky let out a high keening noise at the statement but burrowed himself deeper into the mass of blankets, eyes welling over with tears. Steve took another few gentle steps forward and Bucky burrowed his face into his knees.
“You left me, you left me for that Omega that Carter woman!” he let out another agonized whine and Steve had to bite back a howl of anguish. He’d heard of Omegas being abandoned by Alphas, their marks erased and severed and how they’d slowly go mad at the loss. He just never thought that the serum would do that. He remembered when the news had covered the story of an Omega abandoned by it’s mate, how they’d slowly gone feral before taking a header off the Brooklyn Bridge. Steve had buried Bucky in a nest the entire next week, proving that Bucky would never have to worry about that happening to him.
Now it was.
Upon closer inspection Steve could see his mark going black, rotting. While Steve had been worrying about finding him to get the mark replaced, Bucky would’ve been thinking-
“I thought you were dead and all this time, it was someone else!” Steve crouched down next to the pathetic nest and began growling, his last attempt to get Bucky to calm down.
“Please honey, I don’t want to use my Alpha voice, but I will if I must” Bucky chanced a glance at him through red rimmed eyes and Steve let out a relieved breath that he was making headway. The door opened behind him and he immediately bristled as Peggy’s scent mingled into the room.
“Captain Rogers, I need to speak with you” Bucky covered his hands over his ears as a pained expression contorted his normally beautiful face, pressing his forehead into his knees.
“Not right now ma’am” Steve gently rubbed Bucky’s ankle, pressing all the love he could out through his scent, considering it a win when Bucky began to relax against him.
“That’s an order Captain” Peggy’s tone left no room for argument and Steve felt his own rage begin to bubble.
“Give me five minutes ma’am, please” Peggy said nothing, but her scent fading away told Steve he had been granted the recess.
“Bucky, babydoll look at me” Bucky sniffed and looked at him nervously.
“I can explain everything and I will. I have to go now but I need you to hear me, okay?” Bucky hugged himself nervously and Steve gently leaned forward, feeling Bucky limply allow himself to be pulled into the embrace.
“I love you. I was devastated when I saw my Mark was gone. Peggy means nothing to me. It’s you and me, ‘till the end of the line, okay?” he could feel Bucky scenting him, looking for any ounce of dishonesty.
When he found none he let out another sob and clung to him tightly.
“Alpha…” Steve shushed him gently and pressed kisses to his sweaty brow.
“You try to rest, let the doctors take care of you okay? I will come right back as soon as I’m done okay?” Bucky nodded and Steve hugged him close again.
“We’ll get somewhere safe, then I’ll fix it okay? Get you to give me my Mark back, yeah?” Bucky nodded again as Peggy knocked on the door.
“You get yourself better okay? I’ll be back as soon as I can” Bucky wiped his eyes and nodded, but there was still something in his scent that Steve didn’t recognize.
And whatever it was, it terrified him.
By the time Steve was finally released from his meetings, Bucky’d been released from the medical tent. After searching he finally found him sitting with a group of men he’d rescued from Azzano. A large man in a bowler hat spoke up first.
“Cap, names Dum Dum. Wanted to give ya a proper thank you for saving our asses back there” Steve smiled at the other Alpha and shook his hand, moving through the group before sitting next to Bucky. Bucky sat quietly for a few minutes until the group began to get boisterous at the idea of following Steve to take down Hydra.
“Steve, c-can I talk to you?” Steve looked over at his mate and looked around at the group.
“Let’s just finish this up first okay? Can it wait?” Bucky bit his lip and nodded.
“Yeah, yeah no rush” Steve squeezed his leg under the table and turned back to the group, grateful that his Omega was back and safe.
It wasn’t Steve’s fault, Bucky reminded himself as they sat at the table. Steve didn’t learn about the full extent of Bond severance. It was different for Alphas, they got to move on. Omegas didn’t.
Bucky’s mom had been furious when she found out Bucky had Bonded with Steve. Bucky remembered how she’d gone into hysterics, crying that he’d kill him and that Bucky had signed his own death warrant.
Steve didn’t understand that a Bonded Omega only got one mate. If anything happened to that Alpha, or the Bond with that Alpha that was it.
The Omega died.
Bucky knew he had to talk to Steve, he had to get the Bond back. It wasn’t enough that Steve had told them they were okay, he had to repair it.
And Bucky was running out of time.
Hey Steve, got a minute?” Steve glanced over his shoulder as Bucky rushed up behind him, he paused in his walking and reached out a hand to gently clasp his mate’s arm as he walked up.
“What’s up Buck?” Bucky looked around and bit his lip nervously.
“Do you have a minute? I need to talk to you about something?” Steve’s brows furrowed in confusion when Phillips’ voice echoed behind him.
“Hey Star-Spangled Man with Plan, I don’t have all day!” Steve looked over at the Colonel and turned back to Bucky with sad eyes.
“I gotta go” Bucky grabbed his sleeve and a small spike of desperation shot out of him, catching Steve’s attention.
“Please Alpha, it’s important” Steve sighed heavily and squeezed his hand as reassuringly as he could.
“I promise, we’ll talk tonight okay?” Bucky bounced on his feet as his eyes filled with tears as Steve gaped at him.
“Bucky what’s gotten into you?!” Bucky shook his head as Colonel Phillips stormed up.
“Sgt. Barnes this had better be important, Captain Rogers was due in the War Room twenty minutes ago!” Bucky looked at his Alpha with pleading eyes. Steve felt the pull deep in his gut, Bucky looked back and forth between the two before stepping away.
“Tonight?” Steve nodded and gently clasped the side of his neck.
“Tonight” Bucky nodded and watched as Steve followed the older Alpha back into the building.
Bucky heaved again, clinging to the tree trunk as he vomited. When he pulled back and wiped his mouth he noticed his lips stained red with blood. He let his weak knees buckle and landed hard against the other trunk. He’d taken to wearing his blue coat buttoned all the way up to hide the angry Bite Mark that was now putrid with infection. He knew it was only a matter of time before it hit his blood stream – if it hadn’t already.
Bucky took a few deep breaths before forcing himself up to his feet again and heading back up towards the base. Staggering slightly at the forest edge he straightened his back and forced a smile.
He’d talk to Steve tonight. Then he’d fix it and he’d be better.
Just a few more hours, a few more hours and he and Steve would be able to heal together. Bucky squared his shoulders and headed towards Steve’s officer quarters.
“Bucky! There you are! We’ve been looking all over for you!” Bucky froze as Steve charged at him boldly, grabbing his shoulder as he surveyed around them.
“What’s happening!?” he quickly followed Steve back into his quarters as Steve tossed him a duffel.
“We have intel on a Hydra base just south of the Alps – nothing big but if we leave right now we should be able to get there by dawn” Bucky froze as Steve continued to bustle around the room. He noticed Bucky’s stillness and looked at him in confusion.
“Buck, what’re you doing come on!” Bucky looked at him with hurt eyes and dropped the bag.
“Please Steve, I really need to talk to you” Steve sighed heavily through his nose.
“Babydoll, I know you’re tired, but I need you with me right now okay? I need my Omega” Bucky felt his very DNA sing at the words as Steve pulled him into his arms, resting his forehead against his.
“You’ve been so brave Buck, and I know I keep brushing you off – but you’re getting better and we can defeat Hydra” Bucky wiped his eyes in frustration.
“Alpha, it’s important please – it’s about the Mark” Steve smiled tenderly and pressed his lips to Bucky’s brow, Bucky melting into the embrace.
“I know honey, I want it back too. Let’s get this Hydra base taken down, then you and I can take leave okay? Go to London, get us a nice hotel room with a nesting suite huh?” Bucky smiled softly and nodded as Steve leaned in to kiss him slowly.
“We’ll do it right Buck, just need to get this done first before Phillips has my head” Bucky rested his head on Steve’s shoulder and placed his hands on his chest.
“Can we just stay like this – just for a minute longer?” Steve nodded and gently rocked them back and forth, rubbing Bucky’s lower back soothingly.
“Yeah baby, we can stay like this” Steve tried to place the damp scent emanating from his mate. But he still couldn’t place it.
It was getting stronger. And Steve was getting more scared.
Bucky swayed on his feet as they continued to march through the snow towards the Hydra base, accidentally bumping into Jim Morita.
“Woah, sarge, you alright over there?” Bucky nodded and sent the Beta a smirk that didn’t reach his eyes.
“Yeah, just tired I guess” Morita looked at him nervously and eyed the edge of his blue coat, where angry black streaks were working their way up his body, like veins.
“You sure?” Bucky looked at him and knocked his arm intentionally.
“Yes dad I’m fine” Morita rolled his eyes and grumbled something about dumb Omegas before knocking his arm back and smiling.
“So Captain Rogers huh?” Bucky looked at him in confusion and Jim shrugged.
“Just sayin’ he’s unbonded, and he seems interested in you” Bucky let out a low growl and shot him a look that showed just how unimpressed he was.
“He’s Bonded” Morita looked at him in confusion and Bucky rolled his eyes before slowing his steps so he could walk next to Monty instead.
The British Omega looked him up and down before turning his eyes ahead once more, not breaking stride.
“Have you talked to Rogers yet?” Bucky shook his head but kept walking.
“I’ve tried, but he’s busy” Monty snapped his gaze over to him and spoke sternly.
“Any Alpha who doesn’t have time to ensure the life of his Omega doesn’t deserve him – try someone else” Bucky bared his own teeth in a snarl as he glared at him.
“I would never betray my Alpha, and besides – who would I Bond with anyway?” Monty glanced over at Dum Dum and nodded.
“Not all Bondings need to be romantic, I’m sure Dum Dum would be happy to”
“Absolutely not! Anyways, he said we could take a leave after this base – then everything will be fine.” Bucky tried to sound cocky, but was broke off by a rattling cough that left his lips stained red once more. Monty looked at him with sad eyes and bit his lip.
“From your lips to God’s ears Barnes” Barnes smiled at him bravely but Monty could see right through it. The Omega wasn’t immune to watching the loss of an Alpha slowly kill Omegas, with the war hitting Europe a lot harder than America. As a result of this Monty was keenly aware of what was happening, right in front of him.
Sgt. Barnes was dying in front of his eyes.
“Captain Rogers, may I have a word?” Steve turned as Monty walked up to him while everyone was preparing to storm the base. Steve turned to him and nodded, glancing over at where Bucky was adjusting his sniper’s scope.
“O’course, what’s up?” Monty heaved a deep breath and tried to smile reassuringly.
“Sir, Barnes and I are the only Omegas in the group – so I know about you an him” Steve’s eyes widened in surprise and Monty shook his head quickly.
“I’m not saying this in judgement – it’s just – he’s unwell sir, he needs you to mate with him again” Steve nodded and tightened the strap on his shield.
“Thank you for your concern Monty, but arrangements have already been made” Monty let out a low growl and turned to him in frustration.
“Captain, you aren’t listening to me-“
“Hey, everything okay?” the two looked over as Bucky walked up, shooting a dangerous look at Monty. The Englishmen growled and took a defeated step back.
“Yes, everything is fine” Steve glanced over at his mate and smiled warmly.
“Everyone ready?” Bucky nodded and Steve gently laced their fingers together, using his other hand to point up to the water tower at the base.
“I want you up there, our eyes and ears” Bucky furrowed his brow.
“I mean I can do that, but don’t you think that’s a little far?” Steve nodded as his cheeks tinged pink.
“It’s out of the red zone, I want you safe Buck” Bucky cocked his head to the side and smirked.
“Oh, you worried about me Alpha?” Steve rolled his eyes and pinched his side playfully.
“You know I do, now, you gunna listen to me?” Bucky shot him a soft smile and nodded.
“Yes Alpha, then we can go on leave?” Steve nodded and sent him a reassuring smile.
“Yeah babydoll, we’ll go on leave” Bucky nodded back and picked up his rifle, beginning the long trek to the water tower.
Bucky shook his head again as the fire fight raged below. His head was pounding, he could feel his heartbeat in his throat and everything ached. He blinked the spots out of his eyes again, taking the shot at the Hydra operative headed for Steve. His aim was off – but the shot went through, he could see Steve looking up at the tower and didn’t need to have the Bond to know he was concerned. But he couldn’t do anything about it now.
A sudden wave of nausea overtook him and he turned to vomit through the grate before turning his focus back to the base. He had to be on his game.
Steve looked down at the operative and immediately realized something was wrong. Bucky always shot through the heart – instant death, able to have their families recognize them after. Bucky’s need to retain humanity shining through.
This shot wasn’t an instant kill, he was off by several inches. Bucky was never off. He turned to look up at the water tower and noticed that the Omega was moving more than usual, but from how far away he was there was no way of understanding why.
He turned to Morita and Gabe and pointed towards the tower.
“Something’s wrong with Barnes, go check on him!” the two immediately nodded and ran off, leaving Steve in the fray with nothing but his concern to keep him company.
By the time Morita and Gabe made it close to the tower, the worst of the fight was already over.
“Hey Barnes! You good up there!?” when no response was heard, the two men looked at each other nervously and Morita began to climb up the long ladder towards his friend. Dread burrowing in his gut as Gabe kept watch below.
Bucky willed himself to even his breathing, to calm down. He kept spitting up blood and the searing pain in his neck let him know that it was down to the wire.
He was dying.
Bucky heaved a breath as tears began to stream down his face. He was scared, he was hurt.
He wanted his Alpha.
He heaved through the grate again and was met with a disgusted sound below him.
“Ugh! Seriously?! That’s gro- oh my God! Gabe! I need you up here!” Bucky recognized the familiar voices and fell onto his side, curling up in the fetal position. Morita pounced onto the platform next to the sniper and took him in in horror.
“Jesus Barnes, what’s happened to you now?” Bucky looked up at him with bloodshot eyes and Morita watched them go amber.
“Barnes, don’t go feral on me now” he murmured softly as Bucky suddenly let out a piercing wail.
“I want my Alpha!” with that, his eyes rolled back into his head and he completely lost consciousness.
“Cap! Cap we need you!” Steve and the rest of the Commandos ran from the base.
“C’mon we gotta go, whole place is gunna blow!” Dum Dum led the charge away when Morita suddenly ran in from the side.
“Cap, it’s Barnes, it’s bad” Steve felt his blood run cold as the group followed him to the woods where they’d hidden Bucky.
The Howlies all froze at the sight of the Omega, Monty’s sent immediately letting out a wave of heartbreak.
Steve fell to his knees next to his Omega, immediately beginning to growl to try to provide some form of comfort as the others moved away. Bucky looked up at him weakly from where he was laying in the snow and Steve’s heart shattered at the fear and pain in them.
“A-Alpha…?” Steve immediately nodded and ran a hand through his hair.
“Yeah, yeah Omega I’m here” He glanced at Bucky’s neck
He finally recognized that scent that had been lingering in his mate. It had been rot. His mate had been dying.
And he hadn’t noticed.
“We need to get him back to base” Gabe said firmly, knocking Steve out of his shock only for Monty to resolutely speak behind him.
“He doesn’t have time, the best we can hope for is I saw an old cabin a few hours back” Steve snapped up to him with a grave expression.
“How far back?” Monty stepped back at the ferocity of Steve’s tone, wary of the now unstable Alpha.
“I’d say two hours south of here” Steve looked back down at his mate as his eyes filled with tears. There was no way anyone was going to doubt their relationship now.
Bucky reached out to him across the snow, hooking his index finger into the top of Steve’s boot.
“M’scared” Steve let out a low moan and suddenly scooped him up like he weighed nothing, pressing his face into his hair.
“Don’t be scared, m’right here, I’ll fix it I promise” with that, Steve spun to face south and ran.
Please note that this chapter contains very mild gore as it describes Bucky's infected Bond Mark!
Love you all!
It was almost dark by the time Steve’s enhanced sight could make out the old run-down shack. Monty had been kind when he called it a cabin, it was just one room with a packed dirt floor.
Steve loved it.
He held Bucky in one arm as he struggled out of his coat, laying the writhing Omega on top of it as he began to rummage through the shack, finding different strips of canvass and utility fabrics, frantically building a nest around his Omega.
It wasn’t perfect, but it would do.
Steve immediately lit a fire in the tiny wood stove, knowing that tactically it was a bad decision, but not having it in him to care. He then spun around and immediately crawled back to him, taking off layers as he moved so Bucky could get as much skin as possible. Bucky let out a pained cry when Steve touched him and the sheer agony in his mate had Steve letting out his own anguished howl.
“C’mere, there we go, just like that Buck. I need you to tell me what you need baby doll? How do I fix it!?” Bucky continued to cry as wave after wave of pain engulfed him, shaking his very soul. Steve gave him a gentle shake as he began to get desperate and pressed their foreheads together, tears mingling.
“Please, tell me how to fix it!” Bucky threw his head back, exposing the festering wound which had once been a clean Bonding Mark and wailed.
“Fix it Alpha” Steve let out a sob as he fully took in the Mark for the first time, the once smooth skin was now rippled and bubbling with puss. Black spidery-like tendrils moving away from it as though whatever the poison was had gotten into his veins. Steve couldn’t even begin to imagine how much pain his Omega was in and his very soul cried as guilt consumed him.
“B-babydoll, why didn’t you tell me? Why didn’t you let me know it was this bad?” Bucky looked at him with pain glazed eyes and bit his lip.
“I t-tried” suddenly memories crashed into Steve like a freight train.
“Steve, can I talk to you?”
“Alpha please it’s important”
“It’s about the Mark”
Bucky’s eyes slid closed as exhaustion began to overwhelm him and the only solace Steve could take was that Bucky’s breathing was now deep and even.
“You’re right Buck, you did. I’m so sorry” Steve cradled his head against his chest as tears streamed down his face.
“I am so so sorry”
“Hey, you with me?” Bucky slowly forced his eyes open and Steve almost cried when slate eyes looked back at him, the feral amber retreating back into the little flecks that always decorated them.
“Steve…” the captain smiled and gently stroked the curly brown hair as Bucky curled in closer to him, pulling the sheet tighter around him as he moved in the nest slowly.
“Yeah, yeah baby doll m’here” Bucky weakly clung to Steve’s shirt as he looked up at him. Steve nuzzled their noses together and pressed his forehead against the brunette’s.
“Bucky, how do I fix it baby? How do I bring you back to me?” Bucky licked his lips several times, trying to moisten his lips enough to speak.
“I lost the Bond” Bucky said it so finitely that Steve began to get even more afraid then he already was.
“You didn’t lose it honey, we’re still together, you and me. We just gotta get our Marks back yeah?” Bucky’s eyes lolled in his head and Steve let out a sharp snarl, triggering Bucky’s basic instincts to submit.
“Look at me Omega” Bucky did as he was told, but Steve could see how hard it was and it took everything in him not to cry.
“H-hurts” Steve nodded and swallowed thickly, trying to keep his scent calm.
“I know it does”
“Hurts so bad Alpha” Bucky’s voice cracked, and Steve felt his heart right along with it.
“I know it does, and you’ve been so brave, such a good Omega I’m so proud of you. Let me fix it now sweetheart, let me make the hurt go away” Bucky trembled as he looked at him with so much hope. Steve tilted his head back, opening up a clear path for Bucky to move forward and press a kiss on his Bonding Glands. Steve sensed his hesitation and held himself perfectly still. Bucky was clearly not strong enough to have his own Mark repaired, but maybe Steve getting his replaced would stabilize him long enough to trigger a heat as Steve already knew about the impending rut this would bring in the coming days.
“Go ahead, take what you need Buck” Steve sat perfectly still while Bucky scented him and when his Omega finally let out a soft coo Steve wrapped his arms around him, scenting him back. Bucky let out a soft sob and clung to him as Steve tried to press as much of his love into his scent as he could.
“Shhh, I know, I know Omega I’m so sorry. It was an accident I’m so sorry, we’re gunna fix you right up honey, we’re gunna make the hurt go away.” Bucky nodded and let out another sob, pressing in close.
“You just relax baby-doll, m’gunna take good care of you now okay? Just like I promised. But you give me my Mark first” he felt Bucky’s lips rest on his neck and he barely had a moment to prepare before the white-hot sharpness of Bucky’s teeth sunk deep into his Bonding Glands.
Steve pushed as much love into the new connection as he could, hearing Bucky let out a high-pitched whine as Steve’s side of the Bond reopened.
Bucky could feel all of Steve’s love pushing through, how much he had cherished Bucky and how afraid he’d been when he found out that Bucky was being shipped out.
Bucky could feel the anguish Steve had experienced when he learned about the 107th and the sheer determination he’d had to just find Bucky – regardless of how he found him. Just the need to bring him home. Bucky twitched as the Bond surged through him, filling many of the cracks that had formed in it’s absence and let out soft whimpers as he held his teeth against the new Mark.
Steve held him tightly until it was over, finally pulling back to look at him as Bucky’s heavy-lidded eyes gazed back.
“Did that help at all?” Bucky shot him a small smile and nodded, nestling himself up against Steve and resting his head under Steve’s chin.
“Yes Alpha” Steve let out a wet laugh of relief and peppered kisses all over the top of his head.
“Such a good Omega, so proud of you baby, so glad you’re mine” Bucky hummed and gently wrapped his arms around Steve’s torso, closing his eyes and drifting into an exhausted sleep.
He wasn’t out of the woods yet, but at least he would live to see tomorrow.
Steve continued to scent him lightly as he slept, trying to keep his own guilt hidden.
He’d failed his Mate.
The first tiny bit of this chapter is dark, and referenced the idea of a mercy killing. If that bothers you please skip to below the first dividing line!!
Love you all!
Steve awoke to hear the sound of footsteps outside the cabin. He glanced over and realised Bucky was still fast asleep in his arms, so whoever was outside wasn’t with them.
He swallowed thickly and trained his hearing as much as he could, hoping to make out some form of sound, kicking himself for leaving the fire running.
They were sitting ducks.
Steve felt Bucky slowly move next to him in his sleep and tried to slow his heartrate. He glanced over to his side and realized his pistol was still close by.
“Alpha?” Steve shot his head back over to Bucky, watching as the weak eyes stared up at him in concern. Bucky could hear the movement too. They could hear footsteps getting closer to the door and Bucky grabbed him tightly.
“D-don’t let them take me again Alpha”
“I won’t” Bucky saw Steve’s pistol and pressed it into his hand.
“No matter what?” horror slipped through Steve as he realized what Bucky was asking and he swallowed thickly. Bucky’s scent briefly shot up in panic as the person outside tried the door. He curled into Steve’s chest and his entire body relaxed. Steve pressed his lips to the top of his head and held them there as tears slid down his face. Logically, he knew this was the best way. Bucky couldn’t fight – and not even Steve could get them both out.
That didn’t mean it wasn’t the most impossible task Steve had ever been given.
“Love you Steve”
“I love you too Bucky, I love you so fucking much” the door finally creaked open and Steve slammed his eyes shut, waiting to hear the two words that would force him to do the unthinkable.
Steve melted into the floor as Monty’s voice softly echoed through the room. He immediately dropped his pistol as he pulled his now shaking Mate into his arms.
“Jesus Christ Monty, maybe warn a guy next time!?” Monty hedged into the room and took them in.
Bucky’s Mark was still infected, but he’d gotten his colour back and the dark bags under his eyes were slowly fading. Most importantly though, the smell of rot was gone.
Bucky wasn’t dying anymore.
A quick look at the fresh, still bleeding Mark on the Captain’s own neck quickly clued Monty in as to why.
After surveying the area Monty gently stepped forward and knelt down next to the makeshift mattress.
“Do you need anything Cap?” Steve looked down at Bucky, who was now pretending to sleep to hide the tears of relief. Steve ran a hand through his hair and looked back at Monty.
“Water. Water and any rations you guys can spare. We’ll keep our sleep packs too if you have them. Then I want you guys to all head back to base. We’ll catch up once Bucky can move” Monty looked at him hesitantly.
“Captain, you’re huge targets out here like this, are you sure – we could get Morita or Gabe to stay?” Steve shook his head and gently ran his fingers through Bucky’s hair.
“No, we need to be alone, only leave what you can afford to and go. We’ll catch up as soon as we can” Monty finally nodded and slowly backed out of the cabin.
“We’ll leave the spare radio, in case you need us” Steve nodded and turned back to Bucky as Monty closed the door, gazing down at his mate protectively.
“We’ll be okay, won’t we Buck?” Bucky’s only reply was to cough as he once again slid into sleep’s clutches.
When Steve awoke early the next morning, he became aware of three things. One, the fire had gone out and it was freezing. Two, there was a mound of packs in the doorway left from the Howlies and three, Bucky was already awake and looking at him with soft eyes.
“Hey Buck, you cold?” Bucky nodded but tightened his grip on Steve, eyes shifting around. Steve gently cupped his cheek and brought his eyes up.
“The guys left us some things, why don’t you watch me go get it and bring it back? I’ll start another fire for us too” Bucky shook his head and Steve could smell the anxiety finally pushing through the cloud of fog which had been Bucky’s overwhelmingly ill scent from earlier.
“I’ll be right back Bucky, you’ll see, I promise” Bucky shook his head and grabbed at him as he made a move to leave the nest.
“C’mon Buck, they even left us some more things for the nest. Wasn’t that nice of them?” Steve hated that he had to speak to his Mate like he was a child, but now, when he could spend more than fifteen minutes with Bucky without being interrupted, he realized just how bad it was. How unwell Bucky was.
“No, please, this nest is fine, we don’t need any more” Bucky whimpered, digging his fingers into Steve’s arm. Steve rubbed their noses together gently and murmured.
“When did you eat last Buck?” The Omega hung his head in shame and Steve sighed.
“I’ll be back quickly I promise. I just want to get you some food, water, fix that fire so you’re nice and warm and grab some of those blankets for the nest okay? You can even see me do it.” Steve was very strategic in how he vocalized it, ensuring his mate knew that he wasn’t leaving, and that Bucky would be able to see everything. Bucky looked at him with wide eyes and he smiled tenderly as he brushed the brown curls off his sweaty forehead.
“You just wait right here for me okay? I’m still in the cabin” Bucky nodded and watched as Steve crawled out of the nest quickly, whimpering nervously.
“M’here Buck, m’right here okay? Look, the guys left us their sleeping packs…” Steve was fully aware he was rambling as he picked up the seven packs there.
They’d left them everything. Steve tried not to snarl at Dum Dum’s Alpha scent on his pack and began scenting them all to cover over their scents with his own. He could feel Bucky’s eyes in the back of his head and turned around to smile at him.
“Whattya think Buck? Could we use some more blankets over there?” Bucky’s lips quirked up in the smallest of smiles and he nodded, beginning to relax as Steve walked over with the massive bundle.
“Only the best for my Omega” Bucky eyed him as he crouched down at the edge of the nest, laying the stuff out like treasures meant to impress and Bucky gently picked up one of the small travel pillows, hugging it to his chest and inhaling deeply.
“Steve…” Steve gave an excited smile and nodded.
“Yeah, yeah it’s me. Let’s build this nest properly yeah?” Bucky said nothing, but scooted over so Steve could begin to make the nest. He tried to shape it as closely as he could to the one he used to make back home. Bucky let out a small cooing sound as he watched, slowly curling into the new nest and looking at Steve as he stepped back.
“Whattya think?” Bucky let out a quiet purr as he burrowed into the new blankets, watching Steve as he waited to be invited in, as was custom. Bucky gently gripped at one of the blankets and his eyes filled with tears.
“Everything hurts” Steve let out a low rumble and slowly moved towards the nest.
“I know, I didn’t mean for this to happen.” He gently laid down next to him, picking up a pack of rations and a canteen of water. Bucky allowed Steve to press the canteen to his lips and took slow sips as Steve rumbled in approval.
“That’s it, my good Omega, so proud of you Buck” Bucky allowed Steve to gently rip off small pieces of stale bread to feed him, gently holding Steve’s wrist.
“Always babydoll, you’re still mine, and I’m still yours” Bucky nodded and laid himself on top of Steve’s chest, allowing Steve to wrap the blankets even tighter around them. Bucky would likely sleep for the next few days.
And Steve would keep watch.
“Steve?” Steve’s eyes snapped open and he could almost cry when lucid slate eyes looked back.
“Bucky… hey” Bucky gave him a soft smile before clearing his throat, his voice was still weak, and the feebleness was coming off the ill Omega in waves, but he was speaking in the smooth Brooklyn drawl that Steve hadn’t heard since the train station.
“Can you pass me the water?” Steve let out a wet laugh and immediately passed the canteen over.
“How are you feeling?” Bucky nodded slowly and smiled.
“Not fully healed by a long shot – but I am feeling better” he rested his head next to Steve’s and the super soldier immediately pulled him close, responding to Bucky’s contented purr with a growl of his own. The two lay in a comfortable silence while Steve warred with his guilt before Bucky spoke up again.
“M’not mad Steve” Steve gazed at him with heartbroken eyes and let out a sharp yelp, tears building.
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t know” Bucky smiled ruefully and nodded, gently lacing their fingers together.
“I kind of figured that out” Steve peppered kisses to Bucky’s knuckles, moving his lips up the thin arm and up to his shoulder as Bucky purred, nudging Steve’s face up so their lips could meet in a slow, deep kiss. Steve ran his hand through Bucky’s locks and smiled against his lips.
“I was so scared I was going to lose you” Bucky got quiet for several moments and his lower lip quivered.
“I thought I did” Steve looked at him as Bucky glanced back up slowly.
“What do they teach you about us at the Alpha Academy?” Steve shook his head guiltily as he gently rubbed Bucky’s side, noticing the ribs that jutted out.
“Not enough, it’s only reiterated that we are the head of the house, and that makes it our job to protect you and provide for you. They taught us you only nested when you wanted to breed so if nothing else that should illustrate just how much I’m flying blind here” Bucky whimpered and scented him gently.
“You take good care of me Alpha” Steve cradled the back of his head and rested his lips against Bucky’s forehead.
“Not good enough, you were dying and I didn’t notice – fuck Bucky why didn’t you tell me?” Bucky recoiled at the angry tone, whining as he looked at him.
“You were so happy, y-you were the Alpha on the outside that you were on the inside and everyone could see it. I didn’t want to ruin that for you” Steve snarled and looked at him firmly.
“No happiness is worth me losing you – do you understand?” Bucky nodded and shimmied back across the nest, pressing against him.
“Yes Alpha, I understand” the two fell into another silence and Steve rubbed his back soothingly.
“Whattya need baby?” Bucky buried his face in his chest and inhaled deeply, breathing in his Alpha’s scent.
“My Mark hurts, it’s like everything’s burning” in the closeness of their embrace, Steve could still feel the minute tremors moving through his mate and he pressed him closer.
“How can I make the burning go away? Just tell me what you need Buck and I’ll do it” Bucky shook his head nervously and looped himself around Steve like an octopus, pressing his face into Steve’s neck over the fresh new Bond Mark. Steve could begin to feel the dampness of Bucky’s tears against his skin.
“Just hold me for now?” Steve breathe deeply and nodded.
“Of course babydoll, I won’t let you go”
Steve smiled as Bucky hummed in his sleep, moving towards the comforting feeling of the damp handkerchief running over his feverish skin. Steve ran the cloth down the pale arms and took in all the needle marks and cuts decorating his Mate’s arms and swallowed thickly.
He could feel his Rut starting to come, rearing it’s ugly head. Steve would be lying if he said he wasn’t nervous. He’d been too stressed over Bucky’s enlistment to actually go into Rut last time, and he hadn’t had one since the serum. He didn’t know how his new body’s Rut would go, and Bucky was still so weak. Steve turned back and leaned against the wall next to the nest and watched as the fire from the old stove danced across his mate’s face. He almost looked at peace. Steve could almost pretend they were back in Brooklyn. He leaned his head back against the wall of the cabin and closed his eyes as he felt his guard relax at having his mate so close. He knew that would be partially due to the impending Rut, but partially due to the fact that for the first time since the night before Bucky shipped out, they got to just be still together.
“When’s your Rut?” Steve turned his head slowly and smirked as he looked over at the Omega, Bucky’s eyes hadn’t opened yet, but he was smirking knowingly.
“I can smell it Stevie, I know it’s close” Steve snorted and crouched down next to the nest, running a hand through Bucky’s hair.
“How do you know it’s not just me? I haven’t showered in a few days you know” Bucky nodded his head slowly and finally looked up at Steve, breaking out into a playful smile.
“Naw, that’s a different stink – but yeah you could use a shower for sure” Steve let out a bark of laughter and gently tickled Bucky’s sides as he let out a joyful laugh. Bucky wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck and pulled him overtop of him into the nest.
Steve looked down at Bucky who was caged in his arms. He could see all the different lines and creases in his mate’s face and around his eyes. How tired he was. Steve dipped his head to give him a soft kiss and watched Bucky examine him in turn.
“So, about your Rut?” Steve nuzzled their noses together and rested his forehead against Bucky’s.
“Don’t worry about me Buck, I’m not” Bucky laughed and looked up at him.
“You never worry Steve-“
“That’s not true! I worry about you all the time” Bucky blushed and pulled Steve down against him, purring happily when Steve began scenting his neck gently.
“We gotta talk Bucky, you know that” Bucky’s purr turned into a whine of protest with Steve answered with a warning growl of his own.
“Can we talk later? Why can’t we just stay like this?” Steve shook his head. Bringing a slight Alpha tone into his voice as he spoke again.
“I need you to tell me what happened babydoll. Tell me what happened?” Bucky’s scent began to let off a slightly distressed aroma and Steve gently dropped his weight onto Bucky, kissing his neck and collarbone gently as Bucky began to fill Steve in on what happened after he got on the train.
Bucky talked for the better part of an hour before he finally got to Azzano. Steve could smell the distress growing within his mate and gently pulled back.
“Take your time sweetheart, we’re in no rush” Steve barely got the words out of his mouth when the floodgates opened and suddenly Bucky was sobbing openly beneath him.
“I was so scared. And it hurt so bad and I just wanted my Alpha but I thought you were dead and they wouldn’t stop – all these injections and I don’t know what it was and all I wanted was you but you weren’t there and I just wanted to go home” Steve’s eyes filled with tears and he sat up onto his knees, straddling Bucky’s legs and pulling him up against his chest. Bucky clung to him as he sobbed violently.
“I was so fucking scared Steve” Steve held him tightly and rocked them back and forth gently as he cradled the back of his head, pressing him against his chest.
“Oh Bucky, my beautiful Omega, you were so brave. So brave baby I am so proud of you. Shh, you’re safe now, I gotcha, I’m gunna take care of you honey. You’ve been so strong Omega, so strong. Just let your Alpha take care of you now okay? Let me be strong for a while” Bucky nodded against his chest and dug his nails into Steve’s back as he sobbed.
“Just let it out honey, you’re with me now. I’m here Buck, I’m right here”
Hello! Please be aware that this chapter contains mild "gore" or grossness as it deals with Steve cleaning and "lancing" Bucky's infected mark.
Love you all!
“Okay let me look” Bucky let out a soft whine as Steve gently examined the infected Mark. Bucky was sitting between Steve’s legs with his back to his chest, head tilted to the side as his face scrunched up in discomfort.
Steve bit back a whine of his own at the sight. Bucky was still stable, but it was obvious it was getting worse. He gently pressed around the edges of the wound and watched the green tint of puss move under his skin.
“How bad is it?”
“We’re going to have to lance it baby” Bucky whined again and gripped Steve’s knee tightly as a wave of anxiety flowed from him. Steve pressed a kiss to the base of his neck and rested his forehead between his mate’s shoulder blades. Marks were sensitive, even when he and Bucky had been back home, he remembered his razor slipping once while shaving and the miniscule nick against his Mark and been enough to almost white out in pain.
“I’ll try to make it quick okay? But we gotta get the infection out” Bucky sniffed and nodded as Steve moved over to the stove, setting the edge of his pocket knife into the flames as he gently washed Bucky’s neck with water. Steve positioned himself on the floor within reach of the stove so he could move quickly and handed his belt to Bucky.
“Bite down on this okay? We’re gunna have to try to stay quiet” Bucky swallowed thickly and took it from his Alpha with shaking hands. He gently lay on his side with his head in Steve’s lap, placing the leather between his teeth and gripping Steve’s calf with the other hand. Steve made soft shushing noises as he gently stroked Bucky’s hair, trying to comfort him as much as he could.
“I’ll go as quick as I can okay? M’gunna take care of you Buck” Bucky nodded and squeezed his eyes shut, tears escaping as he squeezed Steve’s leg. Steve continued to stroke Bucky’s hair as he reached for the knife handle, feeling Bucky tremble as he watched.
“Okay honey on three? One… Two…” he could feel Bucky tensing up to jerk away instinctively and sent out a silent apology as he brought the blade down in one tiny but deep slice.
The wail Bucky let out was unlike anything Steve had ever heard, biting clean through the doubled up leather as a never ending river of green and black fluid rushed out of the Mark. Bucky’s nails tore clean through Steve’s uniform pants and were now bedded into Steve’s skin, drawing blood.
Steve dropped the knife immediately and began to apply gentle pressure around the wound, trying to clean as much of it out as he could while he babbled endlessly.
“You’re doing amazing Bucky, so proud of my Omega, we’re almost done, almost done, stay with me Buck, stay with me” Bucky let out a ragged sob through the belt as his legs kicked out in agony.
“Shh, I know I know, it’s okay, we’re okay just breathe Bucky, come on Omega breathe with me, in…and out…” Steve pressed at the wound until thick, angry clots of congealed blood began to pop out, signaling that he was getting to the and of it.
“There we go baby, just about done” he could feel Bucky trembling as he went into shock and his heart cried at being the one causing the pain. Between Bucky’s anguish, his own guilt, and the wretched smell of the infection, Steve was afraid he’d pass out. But he had to hold strong.
“Just about done”
By the time the fluid had begun to run clear with streaks of healthy blood, Bucky was barely conscious. A complete mess of sweat, tears, and what Steve could only describe as poison as he twitched in Steve’s lap, never once altering the iron grip on his Alpha’s leg.
“There we go baby, all done. It’s all done, just gunna wipe it off now okay, just a cool cloth alright – no more knives” technically, Steve knew he should be cauterizing it again with the knife, but he couldn’t bear the idea of sending the Omega into anymore pain. Bucky gave the weakest nod and only whimpered a little when the cool cloth touched the inflamed skin.
“Amazing, you’re so amazing Buck, we’re all done. All done” he tenderly pulled Bucky up to balance him on his chest and kissed his temple softly, gently removing the destroyed belt from Bucky’s teeth.
“How you feeling baby?” Bucky licked his lips and looked at Steve with strained eyes.
“I tried to be quiet” Steve let out a gentle laugh and kissed him softly.
“I know you did, you did amazing baby, so proud of you” Bucky smiled and rested his head in the crook of Steve’s neck.
“Feels open, better”
“Good, that’s all I need to know okay. You tell me if it starts to feel bad again yeah?” Bucky nodded lethargically and allowed Steve to change him before piling the two of them back into the nest.
“Love you Bucky”
“Lu’oo too Stevie” Steve kissed the back of his head as the Omega drifted off into another exhaustion-induced sleep, wrapping his arms around him and spooning up behind him, eying the Mark for any changes.
Steve’s blood was on fire. Bucky smelt amazing. He slowly rolled away from the sleeping Omega as his Rut began to take hold of his senses.
This was bad.
Bucky shifted in his sleep and Steve was met with a wave of summer bonfire and sea air. He held his breath as he took advantage of Bucky’s new position to examine his neck.
The Mark spot (which internally Steve was now referring to as the Void because regardless of how much he argued Bucky on it, he was a dramatic little shit) almost looked like a burn or popped blister, pink and inflamed. Meant to be kept clean and dry, but Steve almost sobbed in relief when he realized all the blackness, puss and odour of it was gone.
For the first time since he’d found his love on that table at Azzano, Bucky actually appeared to be his Bucky.
It was driving Steve insane.
The Alpha began to slowly move out of the nest, heading towards the door. He’d go sit in the snow to bring his body temperature down and rub a few out. It wasn’t the first time he’d done a Rut solo, it was nothing he couldn’t hand-
“Steve?” the super soldier felt the metal of the doorknob bend under his grip as that delicious sleep-rough voice murmured behind him. He gritted his teeth and swallowed thickly as he turned his head to the side, not daring to turn around lest he lose complete control.
“Be right back Buck, just gunna go get more firewood” he heard more rustling behind him and almost collapsed when a gentle hand rested on his shoulder.
“You’re a terrible liar Steve, always have been” Bucky gently stroked down Steve’s spine and moved into his space, causing Steve’s eyes to go black.
“I know you’re in Rut Stevie, I can smell it. Come back to bed with me.” Steve let out a deep groan and shook his head. He could smell how aroused Bucky was, how that sweet smell permeated his body. He was probably hard too. But Steve knew the difference between Horny Bucky and In-Heat Bucky.
And Horny Bucky was in no condition to get laid.
“Baby we know I can’t” Bucky let out a whine and slid his arms around his waist, pressing up against his back.
“M’not made of glass Steve, I can take it” Bucky’s hands slid down to the zipper on Steve’s pants and Steve ripped himself away with a snarl,
“I said no” Alpha voice in full force he watched as Bucky backed away from him, eyes filling with tears as rejection flooded his senses. Steve closed his eyes with a heavy sigh. He leaned against the door and watched as Bucky crossed his arms over himself protectively, eyes on the floor as they filled with tears. Humiliation was beginning to mingle with the rejection and Steve found himself reaching forward against his better judgement, pulling his Mate against his chest.
“There is nothing I would rather do than go back to bed with you my love, but I can’t. I’m not the same as before, I don’t know what this is going to be like and you’re still healing. Let me figure it out on my own first okay? I couldn’t live with myself if I hurt you” Bucky stood still for several moments before eventually nodding. He pulled back and looked at Steve with wet eyes.
“D-don’t be gone long, I worry you know” Steve smiled and gently cupped his cheeks, wiping stray tears away with his thumbs before kissing him slowly.
“I’ll be back by morning, I promise” with that he gave Bucky another scathing kiss, pressing them together so tightly he could feel their erections press together. He pulled himself away and looked at Bucky with black eyes before winking lasciviously.
“Now you’re just giving me something to think about” Bucky barked out a surprised laugh as he backed away a few steps to give Steve the distance he so needed.
“At this point if your wank material consists of anything other than me, we’re gunna have a problem” Steve’s smile turned genuine and he breathed a laugh.
“Never Buck, I love you, I’ll be back soon” Bucky swallowed thickly and nodded, shivering in the cold as Steve took off out of the cabin into the night.
Steve was pretty sure if he was found by a Hydra operative right now he’d probably let them kill him. Sitting naked in a snowbank at three in the morning with his dick in his hand wasn’t even in the top one-thousand things he thought he’d be doing in Europe.
But here he was, three-forty-five in the morning, stark naked in his third snowbank of the night (he’d melted through two) pulling his fifth orgasm out of himself in the woods in Liechtenstein of all places. His heartrate was finally coming back down, and now that the cloud of lust was breaking he was realizing something very important.
His knot was huge.
Well, at least to someone who had never been able to actually pop a knot before – who knew, maybe it was average.
That wasn’t why it was getting his attention though.
One of the things about he and Bucky’s relationship that Steve had always cherished was the fact that they had both been virgins, both of them losing their virginities to one another on their Mating Night.
When Bucky presented as an Omega when he was fifteen, Steve was probably more shocked than anyone else. Sure, Bucky’s father had gone on a three-day bender and his mother had bawled for four hours but Steve decided he reacted the worst. He’d never told anyone until he and Bucky had mated, but Steve had been devastated when he found out. He’d been sure he’d never have an Alpha, it was only ever Bucky who would see enough in him to mate him and now that they were both going to be Omegas he would never find someone.
Bucky entertained his parents by taking out pretty Beta girls and allowing them to invite the local Alpha boys to the house to meet him. But Bucky always went back to Steve’s place after to complain about them. The girls were too soft, the Alphas were too pushy. It wasn’t until Steve had shockingly presented as an Alpha three years later that everything had started to make sense. Bucky only went on double dates after that, and it wasn’t until one night when Steve had adamantly refused to the point it got to a heated argument that Bucky had finally blurted out in full Omega fashion.
“Why won’t you Court me!?” It had opened the floodgates and Steve could do little more than stand there in shock as Bucky began to rattle off all of the things he’d done to prove he was a good Omega.
He could clean, cook, mend. He could dance, and sing. He was able to work but content being a house Omega if that was what Steve wanted. He kept himself pure, going through Heats alone and without aid and never offering another more than a kiss on the cheek. Steve had spluttered out some form of reply and then Bucky was kissing him, grabbing his shirt and licking into his mouth and begging Steve to choose him.
As if Steve had ever had another choice.
Bucky’d never taken a knot before, so now they had to be careful. They’d need to talk about it now. Steve was finally beginning to realize just how different the new body was, and how much he had changed both of their lives. But the only thing he hadn’t done yet was actually ask Bucky how he felt about it.
They couldn’t afford to be away much longer, but Steve couldn’t let them go back without at least trying to have the conversation.
Feeling his Rut subsiding early due to the lack of mate, Steve slowly crawled out of the snowbank and redressed himself, heading back to the cabin.
The sun was just beginning to crest over the nearby Alps when Steve finally returned, ensuring his tracks were covered. He was maybe five feet from the cabin when the door opened, finally showing his mate in the pre-dawn glow.
Bucky was pale, dark shadows still making a home under his eyes and thin arms and legs holding himself almost protectively as he wrapped his arms around his slightly concaved stomach and his ribs slightly stuck out.
He was the most beautiful goddamn thing Steve had ever seen.
“How you feeling?” Steve smiled and gently cleared the last few feet, wrapping his arms around the Omega’s slim waist and kissing him gently.
“Better – cold, but better” Bucky smiled up at him and kissed him gently, eyes shining in adoration as Steve gently guided him back into the apartment and wrapped them both up in the nest. The two lay in silence for a few moments as Bucky handed him the canteen and a portion of rations.
Steve took a few sips and rested his head on one of the tiny pillows and watched as Bucky primped the soft spaces around him in an attempt to make his Alpha comfortable.
“You seem normal” Steve smiled and gently rested his hand on the side of Bucky’s unmarked neck.
“Tired and sore, but I think the serum helps with the refractory time” Bucky waggled his eyebrows playfully and Steve pinched his side as they looked at each other, falling into silence.
“I have a knot Buck” Bucky’s eyes went wide, and his gaze shot down to the front of Steve’s underwear before jerking back up. Steve watched Bucky trail his eyes over the new body and a realization softly formed in his mind.
He’d had multiple chances to examine his mate after he’d found him, to take in Bucky’s new form and watch the war paint itself across his skin. All Bucky knew about Steve was that he was bigger. Steve gently grabbed Bucky’s hand and pressed it against his chest as he spoke softly.
“My heart murmur’s gone. I can see in colour and I can hear perfectly.” Bucky’s eyes shone as he examined Steve’s chest, eyes and ears. Steve watched as Bucky slowly began to examine his new body with his eyes and hands.
Bucky padded down his abs and Steve watched as he hesitated at the waistband of Steve’s boxers.
“Can I?” Steve nodded and gently encircled a slim wrist with his hand.
“You don’t have to ask” Bucky swallowed and nodded, looking down as he gently pulled Steve out of his underwear, holding him gently in his hand.
It wasn’t sexual, and Steve rested his forehead against Bucky’s as he watched his mate gently run his fingers along his member.
“S’bigger” Steve smirked in spite of himself as Bucky’s fingers gently prodded at his currently deflated knot.
“Does this mean you’re not sterile anymore?” Steve inhaled sharply as Bucky gently examined him. He hadn’t even thought about it.
“I-I don’t know, didn’t even think about it to be honest” Bucky nodded as he tucked him away again and looked back at him with excited eyes.
“Maybe – when we get home…?” Steve pulled him close and smiled as he nuzzled their noses together.
“Yeah, yeah baby we’ll try” he could smell the excitement in his Omega as the idea of having their own litter began to take hold in his mind. Steve ran his hand down his side and kissed him softly.
“We could get a house, Captain America should definitely be able to afford a nice brownstone in Carrol Gardens” Steve barked out a surprised laugh and looked down at him.
“What? We’re not staying in Red Hook?” Bucky shook his head and it was like a damn broke, all of the family dreams he’d always had but would never be able to fulfil suddenly taking form in front of his eyes.
“No, there’s nothing for them in Red Hook-“
“What about Manhattan? Or Upstate” Bucky blew a raspberry and Steve grinned as Bucky went off.
“I’m disowning you on behalf of Brooklyn – Manhattan. Oughtta wash your mouth out with soap Rogers” Steve snickered and watched as Bucky continued to talk wildly.
“We’ll need a dog too, a nice big dumb retriever for them to play with, kids need dogs Steve”…
There's SMUT here.
“I want my Mark back Steve” the blonde looked over from where he was roasting a rabbit he’d trapped over the fire and looked at Bucky gently.
“I know you do, but-“
“No, no buts. I’m getting stronger now. We’ve been here a week Steve, we need to get back and we both know it. But if you give me my Mark when we get back, I’ll go into Heat. We need to do it soon” Bucky’s tone was gentle, but even the Alpha knew he couldn’t argue. He sighed and nodded, pulling the rabbit out of the fire and handing part of it to the Omega to eat.
“Okay, okay Buck. When do you wanna-“
“Tonight, we’ll do it tonight” Steve cradled Bucky’s head and kissed his temple as they sat together.
“Okay, but we do it my way deal?” Bucky grumbled but nodded, biting into the rabbit and sitting next to him, settling against him so their shoulders, hips and legs pressed together. The two eating in a comfortable silence as Steve began to wrap his head around everything.
Bucky watched as Steve completely took the nest apart, taking it outside to freshen the sheets up before completely rebuilding the nest. He stacked up their firewood supply and lined up the canteens, remaining rations and a collection of edible plants he’d managed to collect in the snow.
After trying to reinforce the cabin as much as he could, trying to create a smell barrier so the intoxicatingly lavender scent of Bucky’s Heat wouldn’t escape and cause attention. When he finally finished he turned to Bucky and let out a soft growl. The sun had since gone down and in the light of the fire both of their eyes burnt in passion. Bucky got to his feet as Steve approached him, remembering the first time they’d done this. He gently fingered at the buttons on Bucky’s shirt and murmured softly.
“Omega, there is nothing and no one I have cherished as much as you. You are perfect and I wish for nothing more than for you to take my Mark, so that I may be eternally able to provide and care for you in the way that God intended, if you would have me” Bucky’s eyes filled with tears and he stepped into Steve’s space, pressing them together so their chests were touching. He nudged at Steve’s face until Steve looked up at him and smiled warmly as they entwined their fingers together.
“Alpha, there is nothing and no one I have longed for as much as I have for you. I would have you, and wish to be Bonded to you for eternity, taking your Mark and soul as my own to care for and nurture as God intended.” The two let out wet laughs at the old vows and Steve pulled him into a heated kiss, sliding his hands under Bucky’s thighs and lifting him onto his hips as he carried him to the bed, their eyes going their instinctive amber and black as they fell into the nest.
Bucky moaned as Steve kissed him roughly, moving him as though he weighed nothing as he ravished the skin.
“My Alpha, so strong. Take such good care of me” Steve caught a nipple in his mouth and Bucky gasped raggedly, head thrown back in ecstasy as he tangled a hand into his hair.
“Fuck, Steve…” Steve moved to the other to lavish it in attention as Bucky thrusted up against him.
“Shhhh” Steve ran the tip of his nose back up along his skin to press kisses to Bucky’s lips.
“Shhh, so pretty Omega. So perfect. I’ll take care of you baby. Make you feel so good” Bucky whimpered as Steve peeled his clothes off, running his hand up the inside of Bucky’s leg, coming into contact with the Slick beginning to gather there as the smell of lavender began to fill the room.
“Almost there baby, c’mon. Just let go for me” Steve licked and sucked at Bucky’s Bonding glands, still scarred over and with a sharp jerk of his hips Bucky was gone. The lavender scent exploding out into the room as Bucky let out a loud whine.
“Alpha, A-Alpha please, take me. Mark me, I need it. Alpha make me yours” Steve growled at the begging and pulled Bucky into a bruising kiss.
“Present for your Alpha, show me how much you want me” Bucky writhed in his embrace before rolling onto his stomach, lifting his hips into the air and arching his back. Steve sat back on his heels and ran a hand over Bucky’s lower back and ass.
“Yeah, that’s it. Such a good Omega, my good Omega. Fuck, would you look at you Buck” Bucky whimpered and pressed his ass back.
“Please Alpha, please, fill me up. Want your pups, breed me Alpha” Steve’s eyes almost rolled into the back of his head and he gently gripped the globes of Bucky’s cheeks in his hands, blowing softly onto the newly exposed hole. Bucky cried out and jerked as Steve pressed a kiss to his cheeks.
“So good Buck, smell amazing. Can’t wait to taste you” Steve didn’t give Bucky a chance to reply before he buried his face into Bucky’s most intimate place, lapping at him like he was the most delicious ice cream.
Bucky shrieked as his first orgasm was ripped out of him.
By the time Bucky was on his third orgasm, Steve had three fingers pumping in and out of him steadily, stretching him as he repeatedly hit Bucky’s sweet spot.
The Omega was a mess, babbling senselessly as tears of stimulation streamed down his cheeks.
“Yes, yes Alpha so good, so good. Please don’t stop, don’t stop it feels so good. Please. Please Alpha fuck me, I need you to fuck me please, oh god please” Steve finally pulled his lips and hands off his Mate, wiping his chin as he stroked himself to spread Bucky’s Slick on his member.
“Ready baby, m’gunna fuck you so good” Suddenly Bucky rolled over.
“Wait, wait. Like this Steve, wanna see you” Steve paused in concern, it was better for Omegas to be mounted, especially now that Steve had a knot.
“Baby I think it’s better if-“
“No, this way, please Steve. I wanna see you” Bucky didn’t vocalize it, but his scent gave him away and through the overwhelming Heat Steve could smell how nervous he was. Steve surged forward and kissed him roughly, laying him back down into the nest and dropping himself into the crevice of Bucky’s legs.
“Okay, okay Omega. Whatever you want” the two gently undulated against each other and Steve kissed him slowly, pulling back gently.
“You gotta talk to me babydoll. This is new for both of us okay? You gotta tell me if something doesn’t feel good okay?” Bucky nodded and closed his eyes, resting his forehead against Steve’s and whispering softly.
“I love you” Steve kissed him gently again as he positioned himself at Bucky’s entrance.
“I love you too” with that, he gently commanded the Omega to bear down as he slowly entered his body.
Steve bottomed out and forced himself still. Yep, he was definitely bigger. Bucky let out choked sounds in his ear as he clung to Steve’s shoulders.
“S-so big, Steve I don’t – I can’t take it” Steve pressed kisses into his pale skin.
“You’re doing amazing baby, taking me so well. Such a good Omega. Made for me” he could feel his Mate trying to relax around him and he gently stroked Bucky’s side, taking him in his other hand to try to assist the flagging erection.
“What do you need baby, we’re in no rush, tell me what you need” Bucky dug his nails into his back and gritted his teeth.
“Just talk, talk to me Alpha. I-I need to know it’s you” Steve curled himself around Bucky protectively as he whispered anything and everything into Bucky’s skin, holding himself perfectly still as his Omega adjusted around him.
“So good baby, inside you is like coming home. Always so good babydoll. Such a good Omega. So perfect, just for me baby, no one else. Just you and me Buck. My perfect Omega, so good, so good”
“Better?” Bucky nodded and looked at him gently.
“J-just go slow, yeah?” Steve nodded and kissed him slowly as he began to move around inside him.
“This okay?” Bucky nodded and groaned again.
“Y-yeah, fuck Steve, it’s so good. So good Alpha, feel so full.” Steve’s thrusts began to pick up the pace as he felt the knot beginning to expand, knowing the exact moment Bucky began to feel it too.
“Steve?” Steve shot him a grin and thrust his hips just so.
“Feel me baby? Can you feel me inside?” Bucky nodded, biting over Steve’s Mark again as he groaned.
“So big, fill me up so good Alpha, take me please, Mark me Alpha” Steve groaned and felt his knot catching on Bucky’s rim. His thrusts lost their rhythm and Bucky looped his legs around Steve’s hips, pressing his lips to his ear.
“Now Alpha, please, now. Cum inside me, Mark me” Steve’s knot caught and Steve placed his teeth over Bucky’s Mark point and bit down, triggering Bucky’s orgasm and his own as Bucky let out a wail.
One thing Steve forgot though, the completion of the Bond meant Bucky’s consciousness flowed into him just as his had flowed into Bucky days before.
That also meant all of his newfound pain and memories.
Steve had just enough time to realize they were locked together by the knot before he blacked out in pain, completely losing consciousness.
“No! nononono you’re wrong he’s fine! He’s not dead!” Bucky’s cries had woken up the entire battalion as Dum Dum attempted to sooth him. Bucky screamed as anguish consumed him, clinging to Dum Dum as he wailed.
“Steve! I want Steve! I want my Alpha!”…
Bucky jerked back as they dragged him to the table, strapping him down.
“Get off of me! Let me go!” a tiny, mousy man walked up with a smile.
“Sergeant Barnes, my name is Arnim Zola-“ the other Omega flinched as Bucky spit on him, struggling against the restraints. Zola looked at him and tsked in a mockery of sympathy.
“I see your Mark has been severed, I am truly sorry for your loss-“ Bucky was hit with another wave of anguish at the thought of his tiny Alpha cold and dead in New York. Bucky let out an tortured wail began to sob uncontrollably as the loss consumed him again.
“Now now, let’s not get distracted, I need you on your A-game Sgt. Barnes. The injection please.” Bucky tried to jerk away but it was too late, the first syringe entered the skin and fire flew through his veins. Bucky screamed again, but this time it was in pain…
He couldn’t believe it, Steve was alive, his Alpha was here, and he was massive. He was ecstatic, his Alpha was healthy, and he was so happy, and he couldn’t wait to-
A stunning brunette woman strutted up with confidence and an overwhelming smell of attraction. He watched Steve smile at her and confusion began to set in. Who was she? Why was Steve smiling at her? Bucky began to walk over, clearly he was misreading the situation, Steve would never-
A sharp, searing pain – worse than what he’d experienced on Zola’s table ripped through him as Steve’s uniform drifted lightly in the breeze, showing his bare neck.
“W-what?” Bucky’s legs gave out as he screamed and began stumbling away. Watching as Steve advanced on him. He had to get away from the pain, from the horrible reality unfolding around him. His mate had severed from him, for another Omega. And he had the audacity to run towards him to ask what’s wrong.
Steve ran at him and the moment his hands touched him, Bucky whited out from pain, giving a horrid yell…
Why couldn’t Steve see it, Bucky was in so much pain, everything hurt. Every time he laid down – pain, any time Steve touched him. And that woman wouldn’t leave.
"You’re dying Barnes” he looked at Monty with heartbroken eyes.
“I can’t be – he’d know”
“No, my Alpha knows, I’m okay. He wouldn’t leave me like this” But even as he said it, doubt began to curl in him like a dragon.
“He’d know, he’d feel it too” but even has Bucky said it, worry began to pull at his belly button.
“Steve, Alpha please, wake up!” tears streamed down Bucky’s face as he continued to shake Steve’s unconscious form.
He was too damaged; he’d hurt his Alpha. Bucky tried to move the huge man off him, gasping for breath under the monstrous dead weight on top of him.
“Stevie, Steve please I can’t breathe.” Bucky let out another hiccupping sob and looked over at the flames.
“We never should’ve done this, this is all my fault. please I’m so sorry Steve, Alpha please, just wake up” Bucky gave up trying to push him away, merely wrapping his arms around him and kissing his hair as he cried, trying to regulate his breathing so he didn’t pass out.
He was so scared, he couldn’t stop shaking. His insides were burning and he knew he wouldn’t hold on much longer. He leaned over and vomited again, feeling his throat tear and his eyes sting.
He was shaking so much, he knew he was going into shock and that it was going to be bad but he had to protect his Alpha –
Scratch that, he had to protect his Captain. Steve didn’t want him anymore.
Why else would he be actively avoiding talking to Bucky, if not because he didn’t care. Bucky curled onto his side as he began to get cold.
He was so afraid, so alone.
Someone was talking to him, he couldn’t hear them anymore.
All he could hear was the blood rushing through his ears.
When Steve finally awoke, he felt raw in a way he never had before. Bucky’d been in so much pain. How he’d even been standing let alone keeping up with the Commandos was amazing. He finally opened his eyes to take in his surroundings and his guard was immediately up.
He’d been out for hours. The fire had gone out, his knot was starting to deflate and Bucky-
“Oh my god, Bucky!?” Steve immediately used what little strength he had to prop himself up on shaky arms, rolling them onto the side and hoisting the Omega’s leg over his hip.
Bucky was a shaking, sobbing mess. Gasping for air that he had been denied for hours as he clung to Steve’s face, looking him over as guilt crashed through their Bond on a level Steve had never experienced.
“S’bad Omega, should’ve stayed home. Don’t want bad Omegas, no one wants bad Omegas” Steve swallowed thickly, hearing Bucky quoting his father’s cruel words.
"Bucky, Bucky hey, s'okay babydoll, Bucky, look at Omega" he finally looked at Steve’s face and sobbed.
“I’m so sorry, I didn’t think it would be that bad, I’m so sorry Alpha-“ Steve shushed him gently and stroked the side of his face.
“Are you okay?” Bucky let out a wet laugh and looked at him incredulously.
“Me? You’re worried about me!?” Steve nodded and smiled softly.
“Always do” Bucky smiled through his tears and buried his face into Steve’s chest. Steve cradled him close, careful not to move too much as to tug on Bucky’s still filled hole.
“Forgive me Buck, for not noticing. I let you down and I am so sorry” Bucky just pressed closer, too shaken to say anything else as they lay there.
Steve had thought it would be just like last time.
He’d never been more wrong.
By the time his knot had finally gone down, Bucky’s breathing was back to normal and his Heat had completely subsided.
Steve assumed it probably had something to do with the stress of having an unconscious 200-lbs. Alpha sprawled unconscious against him for over two hours.
Bucky was still examining him, trying to make sure everything was actually okay.
“Guess we’re not as good at the sex thing as we used to be, huh?” Bucky graced him with a small smile and curled against him.
“Wasn’t so bad – until you fainted” Steve snorted and tugged Bucky’s short locks teasingly. Steve kissed his forehead and leaned over to pass Bucky the canteen to help rehydrate him.
“Okay now easy” Bucky sipped at the water and Steve growled in praise.
“Good, that’s it. Drink it slow honey” Bucky set it back down and looked at him with sleepy eyes. Steve looked down at him and hummed softly before whispering.
“What did I ever do to deserve you Barnes?” Bucky purred at the compliment and nuzzled in.
“So lucky you’re my Alpha” Steve felt him drift off to sleep in his arms and a small feeling of contentment washed over him.
They were both raw, both sore and stumbling. But they were together again, and now that he had the chance to just relax with his mate again, fainting scare over and threat of death gone – he forgot how easy it was. Just to be together.
He pressed a kiss to Bucky’s hairline and curled around him, praying that for once he’d sleep in, just so the reality of needing to go back to base stayed away for one more day.
It took them two days to walk back to camp, and by the time they stopped for the night they were over halfway back. Steve was building a fire when Bucky coughed slightly behind him.
“Hey Steve?” He turned to look at his Mate with a smile, the renewal of the Bond (as disastrous as Bucky’s Heat was) had the Omega positively glowing. He shifted back up to sit on the log next to him and rested a hand on his knee.
“Yeah, Buck?” Bucky bit his lip nervously for a moment and turned to him.
“Wha-what happens when we get back? I mean, you can’t really hide a Bond Mark Steve” Steve shrugged and looked at him.
“So we don’t hide it” Bucky scoffed, but it was a hollow, ugly sound that made Steve growl.
“Come on Steve, no one in their right mind is going to believe that you willingly Mated me. Your best friend on the verge of death? Who wouldn’t save their best friend if they could – and don’t even get me started on Peggy” Steve scrunched his face and shook his head in confusion.
“Seriously? What is your issue with Peggy?”
“Really Steve!? Other than the fact she basically throws herself at you every time you walk into the room-“ Steve let out a sharp snarl and Bucky clicked his jaw shut.
“She does not, and you know it, don’t be disrespectful and tell me what’s actually worrying you” Bucky rolled his tongue in his mouth and gritted his teeth defiantly. But Steve saw the wet sheen in his eyes and took a calming breath.
“Babydoll, c’mon talk to me” he squeezed Bucky’s hand and the brunette let out a shaky breath, licking his lips and ignoring the tear that escaped his eye as he looked everywhere but at Steve.
“W-when you found me on that table, I wasn’t – I wasn’t alright, upstairs I mean. All I wanted was my Alpha,” Bucky inhaled deeply through his nose and made short rocking movements as he bounced his knees, Steve watching him intently but remaining silent.
“B-but after you passed out, and my mind finally cleared – I realized how selfish I was. You had a chance at something better, a-and I took it away-“
“Bucky-“ Bucky sniffed and wiped his eyes angrily, gripping the Alpha’s hand tightly.
“Let me finish! This, whatever it is, it gave you a body that matched what you are inside – what your soul is. And I – I didn’t even give you a chance to find something better before I sunk my dirty claws right back in because I didn’t want to share. And you’re right, I am being disrespectful – but I hate her Stevie, I hate her because I know that she’s what you deserve – and she knows it too-“ a ragged sob finally escaped from it’s cage in Bucky’s chest and Steve felt his own throat close up.
“I’m scared of everything, shadows, noises. I wake up screaming and I don’t know where I am. I close my eyes and all I see are dead soldiers looking back at me. Sometimes I get so shaky I trip over myself because I can’t shake when I’m shooting. I’m pale and skinny and sick and it takes everything in me to even get up in the morning.” Bucky looked down at his hands and let out another laugh that Steve hated.
“Dad would call me a faulty Omega. And he’s right - so when I look at Peggy, when I see how good she is for you I hate it. You could do so much better Steve. And now you have to walk around wearing my Mark and everyone is going to know and Peggy’s going to be heartbroken and-“
“Hey…” Steve kept his voice soft and gently turned Bucky’s face with his palm, wiping a stray tear away with his thumb as Bucky squeezed his eyes shut.
“Look at me Bucky” Bucky looked up at him with devastated eyes and Steve swallowed the lump in his own throat.
“Do you remember when you asked me to Court you?” Bucky nodded and Steve smiled sadly as he cupped Bucky’s cheek.
“I almost said no. Do you know why?” Bucky shook his head.
“Because I didn’t believe I deserved you. I was this scrawny, wheezy little kid with no money, no job and nothing to offer any Omega, let alone one as coveted as the James Buchanan Barnes. But never once did you doubt me, you walked around so proud – and everyone gave you shit for it. Friends, family – even your boss gave you his opinion. And you just smiled and shrugged it off. When we finally got out of bed after mating – because let’s be real we took an extra few days we didn’t need,” Steve smirked at him and Bucky let out a wet laugh as he nodded in agreement.
“You wore this stretched out old white t-shirt that you only ever wore to bed, and when I asked you what the Hell you were doing wearing that to work do you remember what you said? You said, it’s the only shirt I got that’ll show off my Mark. And they gave you Hell Buck. They mocked you, propositioned you, insulted you – and you never budged. You’d just come home, curl up next to me and ask me about my day. How could I ever love anyone else? You saw me Buck, you saw me, and the rest didn’t matter. What kind of Alpha – no, what kind of man would I be if I just walked away from you now,” Bucky looked at him and Steve let his own tears flow over as he moved his other hand up so he was framing Bucky’s face.
“You loved me when I was pale and skinny and sick. And I have loved you for as long as I’ve known what love is. So why would I do anything less than walk around carrying your Mark with just as much pride. Because I’m so proud that you’re mine – and I am so grateful that I’m yours. And I wouldn’t give you up for anything” the two looked at each other and Steve gave him a gentle shake.
“I love you, you jerk. Do you understand that?” Bucky stared at him for several long moments and Steve held his gaze. Just when Steve was beginning to worry, Bucky nodded his head and squeezed out a few more tears. Steve leaned in to press a kiss to his lips.
“I love you so much Steve” Bucky gripped his forearms and Steve rested their foreheads together, holding Bucky’s gaze.
“You’re everything to me Bucky Barnes – you’re it” Bucky nodded and curled himself up in Steve’s lap as he slid off the log. Steve chuckled and ran his fingers through Bucky’s hair.
“Fit better now, huh?” Bucky nuzzled up under his jaw like he always did and Steve felt the Omega melt against him.
“Always fit Stevie” Steve pulled him tighter and looked at the flames.
“Yeah Buck, you have”.
When they arrived at the base, they were immediately swarmed by the Howlies.
“Oh thank God, we were getting right sick worrying about you lot” Monty babbled as Dum Dum clapped Bucky’s shoulder and caught the fresh Marks.
“Congrats fellas, happy for ya” Bucky smiled and Steve knocked his shoulder playfully before letting out a pained groan at the sight of Phillips and Peggy walking over.
“Damn” Phillips strutted over and cocked his head.
“Captain Rogers, Sergeant Barnes – nice of you to finally join us, how was your honeymoon?” the rhetorical question didn’t get a chance to get answered as Peggy’s suddenly sour scent invaded the group. She looked over at Bucky sharply.
“Sgt. Barnes, I highly suggest you go get yourself cleaned up – you’re positively filthy,” Bucky balked at the tone but his reply died in his throat as she turned to Steve.
“And you Captain Rogers are needed in the war room immediately” Bucky pulled away and went to start the long walk to the medical tent with Dum Dum when he overheard Steve speak.
“Of course Agent Carter, but – is it just me, or is it really warm here?” Bucky turned around in time to watch Steve ditch the top part of his gear, revealing his stretched white t-shirt. His new Bond Mark on full display. Bucky felt his heart swell and he straightened up as Peggy let out a growl. Bucky could see everyone scoping out Steve’s new Mark and the Alpha turned to him and winked.
“Save me a seat in the Mess fellas, haven’t had a good meal in days” Bucky snickered as Dum Dum called out.
“Well you sure as shit ain’t gunna find one here Cap, sorry to disappoint” Bucky found himself loosening his own collar as he watched Steve march off with Peggy and Phillips, who was voicing just how impressed he was with the Captain’s antics. Dum Dum gently clasped his arm and led him to the med tent.
“Let’s get you checked out and cleaned up for your Alpha, Whattya say? We got a lot of work ahead of us” Bucky squared his shoulders and nodded, feeling more confident than he had in a long time.
Whatever came up now, they’d handle it. The worst was finally behind them.
“We’re thinking there’s going to be a train, but we won’t know until intelligence comes back in a few weeks.” Bucky nodded and looked over his Alpha’s shoulder at the maps.
“Okay, so what? We parachute onto the train?” Steve smirked and leaned his head back to look up at him.
“Naw, too boring, I was thinking of a catapult” Bucky snorted and leaned down to kiss him lightly, giving his hair a gentle tug as they kissed chastely. Steve smiled and watched as Bucky went back to puttering around their quarters, making sure everything was clean.
“I think the guys are going out for drinks tonight Buck, you should go” Bucky furrowed his brow in confusion.
“Why?” Steve shrugged and looked back at the folder he was reading.
“Well, I have to go over all these files tonight and you haven’t seen them in over a week. They’re your pals, you should go have fun with them” Bucky smiled softly and nodded.
“They are quite the bunch” Steve smiled.
“Go have fun, I’ll be here when you get back” Bucky grinned and grabbed his jacket, leaning down to kiss him again as he headed for the door.
“Don’t wait up! – hey Gabe, wait for me!” Steve kept the smile on his face until Bucky left, waiting until the footsteps had faded before going over to his trunk and pulling out a file labeled “Top Secret”, stomach twisting as he read it over.
Because Steve had run off with Bucky to the cabin, he hadn’t had the chance to do the preliminary search of the information they had gotten from the base. But now everything had been compiled into one nice, neat folder that would explain everything that had occurred in Azzano.
And everything that had happened to Bucky.
Steve poured himself a glass of scotch and propped his feet up on the desk, leaning back in his chair to read.
It was an attempt at Project Rebirth – the same one that had made Steve – but the problem was that it was an experiment.
No two formulas were the same.
Bucky was the only one to have survived, and he had been injected with multiple versions. Medical had no clue what that meant for him.
Steve opened up the notes Zola had taken during the experiments on his Mate, sipping his scotch nervously.
Steve was two tumblers in by the end of page three.
Bucky was drunk.
No, Bucky was plastered.
It took him four tries and two drops to get his key in the lock, letting out a not-so-subtle “yes!” when he finally found success, marching through the door and immediately stubbing his toe with aloud yelp.
Steve rolled his eyes and propped himself up on his arm, watching his best friend try to take his shoes off.
“Hey” Bucky snapped his head up and muttered “shit”.
“Shhh, go back t’bed Stevie. Go t’sleep” Steve breathed a laugh and crawled out of bed, crouching down to help take his boots off.
“You smell like a distillery” Bucky wiggled his nose and narrowed his eyes accusingly. Although the fact that he went slightly cross-eyed greatly undermined the stare.
“So do you” Steve smiled and nodded, trying to keep his tone light.
“What, I can’t have a few drinks while I’m working?” he looked at Bucky playfully but suddenly Bucky’s big doe eyes widened.
“Yer sad” Steve jerked his head back in surprise.
“S’that why you wanted me to go, so you could be sad alone?” Steve bit his lip and shook his head.
“No babydoll, m’just tired I promise” Bucky looked at him for a long moment and cocked his head to the side.
“Wanna build a nest? You love nests” Steve let out a soft laugh and hugged him gently, lifting him to his feet.
“I do love nests, but I think we should just go to sleep huh? I bet you’re gunna feel pretty heavy tomorrow” Bucky nodded and Steve helped him strip down to his underwear, tucking him in before crawling in next to him. Bucky poked his nose and snorted.
“Don’t be sad”
“You’re absolutely plonked Barnes” Bucky gave him a shit eating grin and nodded.
“I beat Dum Dum at shots. It was ţuică”
“Gesundheit” Bucky blew a raspberry at him as he laughed hysterically.
“S’a plum brandy you punk! From Romania” Steve laughed as Bucky plopped a sloppy kiss on him.
“You probably cheated, you love plums” Bucky moaned and rolled onto his back.
“Ugh, I do” he looked over at Steve and blinked sleepily.
“You should love plums too” Steve raised an eyebrow and looked at him.
“Oh really?” Bucky nodded sagely and rolled away from him, backing up so his back was pressed against Steve and grabbing his arm to pull over his body, making it known he wanted to spoon. Steve hummed against the back of his neck and nuzzled his nose into the baby hairs at Bucky’s nape.
“Really, night Stevie” Steve squeezed him lethargically, cherishing the fact that he was still able to.
“Night babydoll, pleasant dreams”
“Sgt. Barnes, how nice of you to finally join us” Bucky forced a polite smile as Peggy spoke in clipped tones, reminding himself not to take it personally, that she was just hurt. Steve raised an eyebrow at the tone and Bucky shrugged, plopping into the seat next to him.
“Apologies ma’am, my alarm was faulty” Peggy let out a dissatisfied hum and turned back to her review of the maps, highlighting the train tracks that ran through the Alps along the Danube River.
“Sorry for interrupting ma’am, but how are we going to get on the train?” Morita interjected. She turned to Howard who grinned.
“That’s where I come in”
“Are we sure this is the best idea?” Dernier asked quietly as they all sat in the bar, Bucky shrugged and looked down at his glass.
“I mean, probably not. But at least when it’s over we get to go on leave right?” the group all nodded and Morita spoke up.
“So where should we go?” Monty and Dernier immediately began yelling over which was the better destination, England or France, the conversation getting increasingly louder and more heated until Dum Dum yelled.
“What about Switzerland, I mean it’s neutral innit?” the group all looked at each other in confusion and Bucky chuckled, sipping his beer.
“Sure pal. I mean Switzerland is beautiful, it’d be nice to see something not blown up for a change” they all nodded in agreement and turned to Steve.
“Whattya say Cap? Switzerland?” Steve smiled and raised his glass.
“Why not? Switzerland it is” the men all gave a cheers and began to talk animatedly about their plans. Bucky looked at Steve and nodded to the door, the two making up their own excuses as they left amid good-natured jeers.
“So I, uh, I went to medical” Bucky snapped his head up in immediate concern as he continued to change.
“Why were you in medical?” Steve bit his lip and looked down at his uniform shirt in his hands.
“Just a physical – everything kinda happened so fast State-side, I never really got the full workup” Bucky slowly put down his shirt, movements calculated and worry emanating from his scent in waves.
“And? What did they say?” Steve sniffed and Bucky’s scent spiked, rushing over to Steve and grabbing his massive shoulders.
“What – Alpha what is it? Whatever it is, we’ll handle it” Steve looked up at him and whispered softly.
“Buck… Bucky, I’m virile” Bucky’s eyes went wide and his hands dropped to his sides.
“W-what?” Steve let out a wet laugh as his eyes filled with tears.
“M’not shooting blanks anymore” Bucky’s eyes also filled with tears as the most beautifully fertile scent filled the room.
“Y-you mean…?” Steve nodded slowly and he let go if his shirt, dropping it to the floor as he whispered.
“So Carrol Gardens?” Bucky bent his knees as though he was about to jump, leaping into the air and grabbing at Steve as his scent of fertility engulfed them.
“We can have pups!?” Steve nodded again.
“Yeah, yeah Omega, we can have pups” Bucky wiped his eyes and grabbed the sides of Steve’s head, kissing him passionately.
“We can have a family – I can give you pups!?” Steve shook his head and wrapped his arms around him tightly.
“No babydoll, I can give you pups” Bucky let out a noise that was halfway between a laugh and a sob as he leapt into the Alpha’s embrace. Cradling the back of his head and wrapping his legs around his waist, the two kissing passionately through their tears of excitement. Steve plopped Bucky onto the desk, their kisses rapidly turning heated as Bucky’s excited scent triggered Steve.
“Fuck baby, smell so good” Steve licked and sucked at Bucky’s neck, Bucky’s head falling back as he tugged at Steve’s hair, moaning.
“Want your pups Alpha, I’d take such good care of them” Steve untucked Bucky’s shirt as Bucky pulled his lips back to his own. Steve undid Bucky’s pants and stepped into the space between his legs.
“Be such a good dad babydoll, I know you would. As soon as we get home m’gunna get you pregnant Buck” Bucky snapped his hips and groaned, sliding his hands down to squeeze Steve’s ass as the blonde wrapped a hand around Bucky’s member.
“Gunna watch you swell up with our litter, have such beautiful babies, all ours. Sound good?” the two frantically parted lips to tug their shirts off, Steve picking him up and stumbling toward the bed before throwing him onto it and crawling on top of him, propping himself up so Bucky could undo his pants.
“Yes Alpha, sounds so good – fuck – please Alpha, I need you” Steve took both of them in his hand and began to work them together, bringing his other hand around to slowly run his fingers over Bucky’s fluttering hole.
“So wet for me Omega, such a good Omega” Bucky keened at the praise and dug his nails into Steve’s shoulders as he began to work him open.
“S-Steve, Steve m’ready. Fuck me – please Alpha” Steve snarled and worried his teeth over Bucky’s Mark, hearing him let out a choked whimper at the feeling.
“Fill you right up baby, make you feel so good” Bucky nodded and kissed him roughly.
“Always make me feel good, please, want your knot, wanna have your pups” Steve growled at the words and positioned himself at Bucky’s entrance, rubbing the tip of his cock against him. The Omega pressed against him and wiggled his ass.
“Please Stevie, give it to me” the two shared another deep kiss and Steve brushed his hair back.
“Yeah babydoll” he quickly thrusted into Bucky and the Omega let out a pleasure-filled cry. The two quickly setting a bruising pace as they panted into one another’s mouths. Bucky whimpered and pressed his lips to Steve’s ear.
“Come inside me Alpha, fill me up” Steve’s hips lost their rhythm as he groaned low into his Mate’s throat, knot swelling as he came. His orgasm triggered Bucky’s and he clenched his walls around his Alpha, milking him.
Steve rolled onto his side just as his arms gave out, Bucky letting out a breathless laugh as they looked at one another.
“Never pegged you for the domestic type Barnes, out here wantin’ babies” Bucky grinned unabashedly even as he blushed, scent radiating contentment,
“Only wanted babies if I could have them with you Rogers” Steve let out a happy rumble.
“You wanna go back to work at the docks too?” Bucky shrugged and laced their fingers together between their chests.
“Think I’d wanna stay home t’be honest, least till they were in school, then I’d like some kinda work – if that’s okay?” Steve shook his head.
“Why wouldn’t it be?” Bucky cocked an eyebrow.
“Steven, you are aware that most Omegas are obligated to be House-bound after Mating – especially with pups?”
“Well you worked before, so why would it be an issue now?”
“C’mon pal, you and I both know that as good as an Alpha that you are, we wouldn’t have made it if I hadn’t worked – it’s different now” Steve pursed his lips.
“Not to me it ain’t” Bucky purred and the two snuggled closer, still connected, Bucky’s walls still continuously milking Steve’s knot within him. They lay silently for a few minutes before Bucky snorted.
“Nuthin’ just Carrol fucking Gardens” the men’s snickers soon turned into full-bellied, joyous laughter, tears streaming down their face as they laughed.
“You remember that time we went to Coney Island and I made you ride the Cyclone?” Steve looked down the cliff over to where the train tracks were laid against the mountain-side. He could see the smoke beginning to billow around the corner as the train got closer.
“Yeah and I threw up?” Bucky smirked and Steve glanced over at the Omega, who sent him a playful smile.
“This isn’t payback is it?” the attempt at humour made Steve grin as the train turned the corner.
“Hey Buck – why don’t you sit this one-“
“… We’re bugs on a windshield” Bucky nodded at Falsworth and came up to stand behind his Alpha. Gabe took to the zipline first and Bucky pressed a comforting hand to Steve’s lower back as he stepped up to the edge, murmuring softly.
“Right behind you Alpha” Steve swallowed thickly and stepped off, feeling the slight hop in the wire as Bucky loyally stepped off behind him.
Gabe Jones had seen a lot of shit in his life, but nothing in the world had ever prepared him for the sight of Steve in full Alpha mode hanging out the side of a speeding train screaming in his Alpha voice.
“Bucky! Hang on grab my hand!” Gabe felt the world slow down as he rushed through the car, finally catching the glimpse of his sergeant hanging out the side of the train, clinging to a piece of metal that was clearly not going to be there much longer. Gabe pushed himself, willing his legs to go faster. He could see the slate in Bucky’s eyes disappear into amber as he tried to lurch himself forward to catch his Alpha’s hand. Gabe didn’t need to be an Alpha to see the terror and trust in those amber orbs, the sheer belief that his Alpha would save him. Bucky lunged out in a risky move.
Steve lurched out the hole in a desperate catch.
The bar let go.
Bucky let out a cry unlike anything Gabe had ever heard, his entire body going numb as realization of what he had just witnessed engulfed him.
“Bucky! No!” Gabe lunged as the Alpha jumped, pulling the super soldier back into the train as the brunette’s form disappeared into the ravine below.
“No! Cap stop! Stop!” Steve roared and attempted to throw Gabe off him, but in his grief he was uncoordinated. Steve fell to his knees as horrible screams echoed through the train for everyone on board to hear.
“M’sorry, I’m so sorry Cap, oh God” Steve pressed his face into the floor of the train car and let out an anguished wail. Gabe’s throat hurt in sympathy as tears slid down his face.
“Oh God, Oh God Steve I’m so sorry” but Steve couldn’t hear him, all he could register was the horrible death cry of his Mate as he plummeted to his death, echoing in his ears over and over again.
Peggy stepped silently into the bombed out tavern, watching the Alpha drink.
“Steve?” her eyes filled with tears at the overwhelming scent of anguish that engulfed the Alpha.
“Did you have to be so cruel to him?” she stopped short and Steve looked at her with red-rimmed eyes and a wrecked voice.
“He knew you hated him, and I defended you.” Peggy breathed deeply to calm herself, she knew Steve’s grief needed an outlet, that’s why she’d came instead of Phillips.
“I’m sorry” a devastated sob ripped through Steve’s throat so ferociously that Peggy flinched.
“W-we were gunna go home after this, we were gunna have a family. We were going to move to Carrol Gardens” Steve heaved again and Peggy pressed her hands over her mouth to hide her own anguish.
“Steve – oh Steve I’m so sorry”
“It’s all my fault!” Steve hurled the scotch bottle at the wall as he collapsed from the chair, Peggy immediately falling next to him.
“Yes it was! It was my idea to enlist! I wanted to be here! But they didn’t take me, they didn’t take me because I was so fucking pathetic but they took him! They took my Omega and painted war all over his skin and then I made him stay here-“ Steve jerked as his eyes went wide.
“I killed him! I killed my Omega!” Peggy was at a loss, doing nothing more than pulling his heaving body into her arms as he sobbed.
“I killed him! Oh God I killed him!”
“I gotta put it in the water” Steve could hear Peggy freeze on the other end of the radio.
“No, Steve we can figure something else out” Steve blinked back tears and pulled out his compass, opening it to the picture of the grinning Omega. Steve gave a wet smile and gently pressed his hands against his Bond Mark, momentarily furious that his didn’t infect like Bucky’s had. That he wasn’t able to suffer the consequences as well.
“Peggy this is my choice,” he took a shaky breath and spoke softly.
“Don’t ask me to live without him Peggy, please”
“Okay, okay, but I’ll be right here okay? I’m right here Steve” Steve closed his eyes, welcoming the ice that engulfed him.
“Put us toget-“ Steve’s world went black.
Peggy looked at the bare wall along Shield headquarters. She turned over to Howard and looked at him with sad eyes.
“I want this to be a wall to the Fallen” Howard nodded and Dum Dum came up on the other side.
“I’ll try to find a good picture of Cap, one not too flashy” Peggy shook her head.
“No, not for Steve – I want Sgt. Barnes on the wall. Everyone will remember Captain America, the least we can do is remember his Mate” the two men nodded silently and watched as Peggy slowly moved back into her office, wiping her eye of a stray tear.
“Good afternoon gentlemen. I wanted to let you know I’m getting married today. He’s a real gentleman – a Beta. I’ll leave seats for both of you, of course.” Peggy wiped an eye and looked down at the grey stone.
“You both deserved so much more. I am so sorry” She squared her shoulders and turned, her classically confident walk as she moved back to her car and nodded to Jarvis.
“Alright then, let’s get this show on the road.”
“Yes ma’am” Jarvis turned back over and nodded at the tombstone before moving back to the vehicle himself.
“Gentlemen, always an honour”. He got in and drove them out of the Brooklyn Cemetery, leaving the tombstone shining in the daylight.
STEVEN G. ROGERS JULY 1918 – FEBRUARY 1945
JAMES B. BARNES MARCH 1917 – NOVEMBER 1944
TILL THE END OF THE LINE
They told Steve that he would love the future.
Steve didn’t like the future, in fact he hated it. It was too loud, too bright. New York moved too fast and it was too expensive.
Bucky would’ve loved it.
Steve didn’t stay in New York long, moving as soon as he could to Washington DC. Away from the memories that plagued every street.
He met Sam Wilson while he was running, the strong Omega giving Steve an entirely new outlook on what it meant to be Alphas and Omegas in this day and age. He ripped on Steve, and didn’t back down simply because he was an Alpha.
Bucky and Sam would have really gotten along.
The doctors told Steve that he had gone into the ice so soon after his Mate’s death that the Mark hadn’t had a chance to fade. They’d said not to worry, that it would fade in time. But Steve didn’t want it to fade, if it faded, it meant it was over. That his Bucky, his Omega, was gone forever.
So when he’d been around for over a year and the Mark hadn’t faded at all, Sam had started getting worried.
“We should get it looked at Steve” Steve snarled at the Omega and backed away.
“No, it’s fine. They said it’ll fade, it’s probably just the serum-“ Sam looked at him with sad eyes.
“Steve, if anything, the serum should’ve had it fade faster. Come on man, I’m worried about you. You can’t move on until it’s gone” Steve’s eyes went black and he pitched his Alpha voice low.
“Move on? With who? You?” Sam snarled and stood firm, his own eyes going amber as he bared his teeth.
“Don’t you dare lash out at me Rogers. First of all, you ain’t my type. Secondly, the Mark not fading could be a symptom of something else. So let’s go get you looked at. I ain’t askin’” Steve reluctantly nodded and dragged his feet after Sam as he led them down to his car, phone to his ear.
“Hey Stark, I’m bringing Cap in – yeah – thanks man, heading there now,” he turned to Steve who sat defeatedly in the passenger’s seat and spoke softly.
“Stark’s gotta jet at the airport, Banner will look you over at the Tower, no reason getting someone else involved” Steve swallowed thickly and nodded, sure that his heartbroken scent was stifling in the car. Sam stayed quiet for a few minutes before he spoke again delicately.
“You don’t have to get rid of it Steve, if it doesn’t fade. I still have mine” Steve shot a look over to him before sighing heavily.
“Riley” it was a statement, not a question but Sam nodded all the same.
“When he died they threw me into the ICU to stop the severance. With the RBP in effect, Mated pairs aren’t allowed in the military anymore. But we both wanted to serve so we placed our Marks in hidden areas instead and called in a few favours with medical. I still have it, stare at it everyday” Steve swallowed thickly.
“RBP?” Sam smiled sadly.
“The Rogers-Barnes Proposition, Shield lobbied to put it into affect in the fifties after everyone realized just how many were lost due to Mated pairs enlisting.” Steve looked at him with wide eyes and Sam nodded.
“Agent Carter didn’t want anyone to go through what you had, that was probably her biggest legacy” Steve nodded his head, too choked up to speak as Sam pulled into the airport parking lot.
“Sam, about what I said before-“ Sam placed a hand on his shoulder.
“Don’t have to apologize man, I know how much you’re hurtin’ just try to keep that temper in check, not everyone is as wonderful and understanding as your best friend Sam” Steve let out a wet laugh and nodded.
“When was the Bond severed?” Steve sat on the exam table in the Avengers Tower, gripping the metal nervously.
“October 15th, 1943 – the day I got the serum” Bruce nodded and scribbled at his paper as Steve spoke up.
“B-but we Re-Bonded, a-after Azzano. March 17th, 1944. Buck had just turned twenty-seven” Bruce looked up at him with soft eyes.
“So you were fully Bonded when-“
“Yeah, yeah uh, could we just get on with it? I don’t mean to be rude but I don’t really want to talk-“
“That’s okay, we don’t need to talk about it. I just have one more question before I do the physical exam, is that okay?” Steve gritted his teeth and nodded.
“Thank you Steve. Umm, how long after Sgt. Bar- how long after Bucky’s passing did you go into the ice” Steve slammed his eyes shut as the imagery of his Mate plummeting to his death invaded his memory, his cry filling his ears and Bucky’s smell of pure terror filling his nostrils as freshly as when he was standing on that god forsaken train.
“Four months and six days” Bruce nodded and silently finished scribbling, standing up and slowly walking towards him.
“May I touch it?” Steve jerked his head away instinctively and swallowed, blinking the tears out of his eyes and laughing self-deprecatingly.
“Don’t be, I promise I’ll be gentle Steve, I won’t hurt him okay?” the use of the word him didn’t go by unnoticed, and Steve found himself grateful that finally someone understood.
“Thank you” he whispered softly and Bruce nodded silently, beginning to softly touch around the Mark, explaining every movement he made.
“That’s not possible” Tony and Bruce looked at the results in shock as Steve looked over at both of them.
“What’s not possible!?” Sam placed a calming hand on Steve’s shoulder as he began to worry. Bruce looked at him hesitantly.
“Steve, Bond severance is different for Alphas than Omegas – as you know. But an Alpha’s Bond does rot” Steve looked at him nervously.
“Is it rotting?!” Bruce shook his head.
“That’s the problem Steve, your Bond isn’t rotting – it’s not even severed” Steve looked at him uncomprehendingly.
“Wha-what are you saying?” Bruce let out as much of a calming scent as the Omega could muster as he sat down across from Steve.
“Steve, your results would indicate that Sergeant Barnes is alive” Bruce was still talking, but much like when he’d stood in the rain with Captain Phillips almost seventy years before, Steve’s hearing faded as overwhelming white noise began to engulf him.
“Steve? You with us Cap?” Tony tapped him gently and Steve snapped his head over to him.
“He’s alive!?” Steve jumped from the table and ran from the room, ignoring the calls of his friends as he ran to grab his suit.
“Jarvis! Get me on the first flight to Austria, now”
“Yes Captain Rogers, your flight will be leaving Newark in forty-five minutes” Steve nodded and charged out the door, sprinting through Manhattan with nothing more than a backpack carrying his uniform and his shield.
Bucky was alive, trapped in an icy river for decades. Waiting for someone to come get him.
No, waiting for Steve to come get him.
Steve pumped his legs even harder, ignoring the stares of New Yorkers as he ran.
He couldn’t keep his best guy waiting.
“You’re not about to do what I think you’re going to do? Are you?” Steve continued to strip himself along the snowy edge of the Danube.
“Don’t you have some foreign government to topple?” he snarled as he used his shield to break a hole in the ice, looking down at the black river flowing below. Seventy years his love had been buried beneath ice and mud. Steve wouldn’t let it be another minute. The blonde didn’t give the spy a chance to answer before he dove beneath the waves.
Natasha was almost worried by the time the captain resurfaced twenty minutes later, chest heaving and shaking like a leaf in his white skin.
“He’s not there Steve” Steve ignored the chattering of his own teeth as he resurfaced from the icy water again. Natasha Romanov standing next to his shield on the riverside. Her voice almost kind.
“You don’t know that” Natasha sighed heavily and crouched down on the icy bank next to him.
“C’mon Steve we both know there’s no way he’d be in the river all this time, someone would have found him” he closed his eyes and slammed his shivering hands into the water, watching the images blur as tears of frustration welled in his eyes.
Natasha looked at her friend with sympathy, placing one hand on her knee as she extended a hand to the blonde.
“C’mon grandpa, let’s get you dried off” Steve trudged out of the water and allowed Natasha to drape a thick blanket over his shivering form.
“So where’s everyone else, waiting until I dry off to tell me how stupid I was” Natasha gave him a patient smile and murmured a thank you to the waitress who brought them over coffees.
“Nope, we figured you really only needed one babysitter” Steve snorted and looked at her with serious eyes.
“He’s alive Nat, how is that possible?” she shrugged and sipped her coffee.
“I couldn’t tell you Steve. But I’ve heard crazier things so…” she trailed off and looked at him curiously
“Do you have a picture of him on you? Once I get your dumbass home I’ll start poking around with my contacts” Steve began to shake his head and Natasha spoke firmly,
“Listen here Rogers, you’ve got nothing. Go back home, set up a house or whatever the Hell you old-fashioned Alphas do” Steve snorted and looked at her.
“I can help”
“No you can’t. Go home Steve. I’ll get us a lead and call you, okay?” Steve sniffed and nodded, looking at her with piercing eyes, before slowly reaching into his pocket and pulling out an old, tarnished compass, opening it up to reveal an old faded photo of the beloved Omega and Natasha gently took it in her hand.
“You give me your word, as soon as you get something, you tell me?” Natasha nodded and stood.
“You have my word” with that the spy disappeared into the hustle and bustle of the nearby street, leaving Steve alone with his thoughts.
Steve would have loved the opportunity to build a home for Bucky, and he’d be lying if he didn’t say that he’d definitely been looking at real estate in Carrol Gardens. Unfortunately, Tony’s inability to control himself left Steve fighting evil robots in a country floating hundreds of feet above the earth.
It was all fine really until that Maximoff girl had zapped him back into 1945, swing music playing, everyone celebrating and in the middle of it all his Bucky standing there grinning excitedly.
“War’s over, we get to go home Stevie can you imagine it!?” Steve had cleared that dancehall in about two-point-five seconds, scooping the Omega up into his arms and kissing him. Bucky had reacted immediately, wrapping his arms around his neck and kissing him back passionately.
“Woah, hey pal you okay?” Steve still had the brunette suspended in the air as he stroked the back of the captain’s blonde hair. Steve had begun to nod and suddenly found himself shaking his head as a sob escaped him.
“Steve? Hey, hey we’re okay. We’re okay Alpha we can go home now” Bucky placed his feet back on the ground and framed his face in his hands.
“I miss you, I miss you so much and it hurts so badly” Bucky looked at him in confusion.
“But I’m here, I’m right here. You just need to find me” Steve looked into the slate eyes and wrapped his arms tightly around the slim waist, burying his face into his neck.
“I will, I will Omega, I promise” Bucky purred and cradled the back of his head.
“My Alpha, always take such good care of me”
Steve had promptly collapsed into the middle of the warehouse, and while he lay there convulsing in the pain of once again losing his mate, he’d locked eyes with the young girl and had watched as horrified realization had crossed her face, bringing gloved hands up to her mouth as tears fell from her eyes.
He and Wanda had never spoken about it, but she had come up one day to ask him about what it was like being Bonded, and Steve could work with that.
Steve looked up as his old compass was gingerly set in front of him.
“Natasha?” she smiled at him sadly and nodded her head.
“Hey Steve, can I sit?” Steve nodded like an overly excited child, shoving out the chair next to him and closing up his report files.
“Did you find something!?” she nodded hesitantly, and Steve looked a her nervously.
“What? What is it!?” Natasha took a deep breath in and looked at him.
“We’re friends, right Rogers?”
“Of course” Natasha swallowed thickly and pulled a thick, red folder from her purse.
“And you trust me?” Steve nodded and she finally looked up at him and Steve was horrified to find her eyes welling with tears.
“So you know, that when I tell you that you may not want to pull on that thread, I genuinely mean it because I care about you?” the two Alphas locked eyes and Steve gaped at her, mouth falling open. His eyes shot down to the folder and he extended his hand.
Whatever she’d found on Bucky, it was bad.
“Give me the folder Natasha” she slid the file across the table and watched as Steve opened it to the first page, where Bucky’s service photo was placed alongside his “most recent” picture. Steve let out a pained groan and the file slipped from his shaking hands onto the table.
It was worse than anything Steve could have ever imagined.
When Steve was sixteen, he and Bucky had needed to ride back from Coney Island in a refrigerator truck because they’d spent too much money trying to win a prize for this Beta girl Bucky’s parents had set him up with.
Bucky had felt horrible, wrapping his own thread-bare coat over Steve’s tiny shoulders as guilt had come off the Omega in waves. Steve had tried to make jokes about it to lighten the mood, but Bucky had sunk further and further into himself before Steve gently reached over and grabbed his shoulder.
“S’okay Buck I had a good time, really” Bucky’s smile had broken out like a sunrise and suddenly it wasn’t as cold anymore.
Siberia was freezing, the deep bone-chilling cold clinging to him. Steve, Sam and Natasha slowly walked into the room and Steve froze.
Staring right at him was a large, metal chair with a bunch of wires and a metal table with a series of tools and a mouth guard. Steve slowly advanced towards it when a scuffle was heard from outside the room, the three immediately filed into the shadows, holding their breath and trying to figure out what kind of attack plan they had when the door swung open.
Steve couldn’t have mounted an attack even if he tried.
The man was convulsing, covered in liquid as he was dragged into the room. He appeared to be struggling weakly, but the others didn’t seem to pay him any mind.
They heaved the man into the seat and Steve’s world ground to a stop. He knew those slate eyes anywhere. Sam suddenly grabbed him and held him still, shaking his head, whispering harshly.
“Not yet!” Steve looked back at his Mate with devastated eyes as he was locked into the chair through electric volts. Steve took the body of his Mate in in devastation.
Bucky was much larger than before, his body mirroring more of an Alpha’s form than the lithe beauty of his Omega form. His hair was long and unkept, his body covered in scars and-
Steve clapped a hand over his own mouth in horror as he took in his lover’s injury. Angry scar tissue winding around his shoulder up to where it molded into the angry, thick metal plates of his left hand. A large, red star painted on the shoulder.
Through all of it though, clear as day on Bucky’s neck, a Bonding Mark stood proudly.
Natasha slowly slipped away, slamming her eyes shut as the machine clicked on and Bucky’s screams of pain echoed through the concrete room.
When she had realized who Bucky Barnes was, she’d been horrified. She didn’t know him as Bucky though, she knew him by a different name.
Yasha spent hours with a young Natasha, training her and helping her perfect her techniques.
He also held her when she cried, snuck her extra food and would pull his punches when they were sparring so she wouldn’t be punished.
She remembered how he’d always had a softness about him, and how he’d always whisper into her ear as she walked by.
“ Не дай им увидеть, как ты плачешь, Таша, не давай им удовлетворения ”
He was the closest thing she’d had to family, except when he got in the chair. He wasn’t Yasha anymore.
He was The Soldier.
Natasha felt a tear slip down her face as she continued to walk down a hall, pulling out her gun and reaching up to her comm to speak softly.
“Time to cause a scene Stark”
“I do love an entrance” Natasha walked up to the railing and looked down at the large propane tank, an excellent distraction. She breathed deeply and repeated the words the man used to quietly murmur to her over and over again.
“Do not let them see how you cry, Tasha, do not give them the satisfaction” with the screams of the man echoing in her ears, she cocked the hammer back and fired.
“Longing, rusted, furnace..”
Steve watched in horror as Bucky jerked his head, he couldn’t tell if it was from the aftermath of the electric shocks, or if it was from the words but there was one thing he was sure of over all else.
His Omega was in so much pain.
Sam grabbed the Alpha to ground him and whispered softly.
“Not yet, Steve – not yet” Steve was opening his mouth to say ‘fuck it’ that running in alone was better than watching this when it happened.
“Benign, nine, homeco-“ the explosion rattled the warehouse and the men all stopped, looking at each other before running out to investigate.
Leaving Bucky strapped into the chair, chest heaving in pain.
The moment the room was clear Steve ran over.
“Hey, hey Bucky it’s me – it’s me babydoll. I found you, I finally found you!” Sam watched as the two of them finally managed to get Bucky out of the restraints. Steve framed his face and stared at him.
“Bucky?” confused, lifeless eyes looked back at him and Steve felt a sinking sensation in his stomach.
“Who the Hell is Bucky?”
“We gotta go Steve” Natasha froze as she entered the room.
Sam was standing guard, looking around for threats as Bucky sat catatonic on the edge of the chair, looking blankly at Steve as the Alpha yelled in hysterics at him. Natasha felt her heart ache and she walked over quickly and spoke in clipped Russian.
“Яша, мы должны идти, мы должны выйти сейчас” Bucky looked up at her almost as though he was snapping out of a trance and gaped.
“Таша, ты жив?”
“Yes, I’m alive. Now come on, we have to go Soldat, stay with Captain America” Bucky looked back at the weeping blonde almost in confusion but nodded, taking the Beretta she handed him.
“Leave no survivors”.
“He’s scared” Tony glanced at Steve who had red-rimmed eyes focused through the two-way mirror, not even blinking as he watched his Omega on the exam table.
“Looks numb” Steve shook his head, biting his lip as a rogue tear fell from his eye.
“See how his eyes keep moving? Not darting, just sweeping. He already clocked his exits when we put him in there Tony, he’s looking for me” Tony cleared his throat, hating what he was about to say even as he opened his mouth.
“Steve, he doesn’t even know who you are, I don’t think he’s looking for you man” Steve was about to rebuttal when Natasha walked up to the two men, standing between them.
“No, Steve’s right Tony. Barnes is looking for him – he just doesn’t realize it.” Steve glanced at her with confused eyes and she heaved a heavy sigh.
“Barnes – we called him Soldat. He’s the Fist of Hydra. Their top assassin, they used to bring him to the Red Room to train us. The idea was that we didn’t have to win we just couldn’t lose – anyone who did was killed. I was fourteen the day I was supposed to fight him, and I was hiding in a closet crying-“ Natasha cleared her throat in an uncharacteristic show of emotion and sniffed.
“He found me, and I was so scared. He closed the door and knelt down next to me and I was sure he was about to snap my neck. Instead – instead he wiped my tears away and said don’t let them see you cry. Don’t give them the satisfaction of breaking you. The next day when we fought, I could feel him pulling his punches,” Natasha looked over at Steve.
“I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for Yasha – James I mean, and at the risk of over stepping I think I may have been the closest thing he ever had to a friend while he was at the Red Room. He talked about you all the time. But he had no idea who you were. I just thought maybe it was his first handler but whenever people entered the room – he’d always look for you” Steve wiped his eyes and looked back through the window.
“Let me see him Tony – I’m not asking” Tony bit his lip and squared his shoulders.
“Not until his test results are back – we don’t know what he’s capable of”
“I can handle it” Steve flinched when his teammates spoke in unison.
“No you can’t”.
You'll notice my brief nod to Steve's grey Henley from the Endgame trailer because it just DOES something to me.
Anywhooo moving on!
The silence was overwhelming, and Steve was sure he’d never seen Bruce look so nervous.
“I just – I don’t understand how he even survived Steve. There’s so much damage and his arm isn’t even the worst of it” Steve sat down on a hard plastic chair as Bruce droned on and on about Bucky’s injuries.
“Can I see him?” Bruce shook his head in disbelief.
“Steve, did you hear anything I said?!” Steve stood and locked eyes with him.
“That’s my Omega in there. That is my Mate and he needs me. We’ll figure the rest out later, right now I just need him to know I’m here” the group all sat silently and watched as Steve headed for the door when suddenly Natasha spoke up.
“Steve – there’s one thing you should know before you go in” he turned back to look at her with furrowed brows as she held eye contact.
“They sterilized him” Steve’s knees buckled and he recovered quickly, grabbing the door.
“T-Tony, can you cancel the offer I made on that place in Carrol Gardens please?” Tony looked at him sadly, nodding as Steve slowly entered the exam room.
The Omega’s slate eyes immediately shot to Steve’s as he stepped into the room. Steve let out what he hoped was a comforting growl. He smiled in spite of himself when Bucky’s shoulders relaxed and he instinctively let out a replying purr.
“Buck, do you remember me?” Bucky’s stringy hair was falling into his face as he looked away in confusion.
“Your mom’s name was Sarah… you used to wear newspapers inside your shoes” Steve let out a wet laugh as he nodded, kneeling down in front of him.
“You’re right, you’re right I did. C-can I touch you Bucky?” Bucky’s eyes were hesitant but he nodded, looking at Steve warily as the Alpha slowly moved forward. Steve hesitated a moment before slowly moving up to frame Bucky’s face, moving to rest his forehead against Bucky’s.
“Do you know who I am?” Steve breathed into their shared space. He could smell the distress coming off the Omega and his heart broke.
“I-I don’t know, I can’t…” Steve gently rubbed his thumbs over Bucky’s temples, closing his eyes.
“I know you do. It’s right there Buck, just a little further.” Bucky squeezed his own eyes shut and bit his lip, fighting the horrible headache forming behind his eyes.
“Your name is Steve” Steve nodded, laughing softly as tears escaped his closed eyes. He never thought he’d hear that voice say his name again.
It was ecstasy.
“What else? Take your time sweetheart, we’re in no rush” the sentence slammed into Steve like a freight train, remembering when he’d murmured the same words into his skin in a run down shack in Lichtenstein.
Some part of the Omega must have remembered too, because his whole body shuddered in response. The Omega shook his head and let out a frustrated sob.
“We were in Brooklyn” Steve pressed his lips to Bucky’s forehead and sniffed, letting his lips linger on the sweaty skin.
“You’re right baby we were. You’re doing so well. Just a little further” Bucky shook his head.
“M’head hurts” Steve pulled back and went to step away.
“Okay, let me see if Tony has something for-“ he stepped out of Bucky’s space and the cry he let out was nothing less than primal.
“No! Alpha!” Steve froze mid-pivot, turning back to Bucky with wide eyes.
Bucky had his flesh hand reaching out, eyes wild and hair falling into his face as he leaned off the exam chair, metal hand holding the steel in such a firm grip he’d bent it.
Steve didn’t need to see through the two-way mirror to know he wasn’t the only Avenger stunned. To be fair though, Bucky looked decently surprised with himself. Steve froze as Bucky suddenly jumped up from the table, charging towards him on unbalanced legs, arm extended to his neck.
“Bucky?” he heard the door open and saw Tony and Natasha rush into the room, one of Tony’s Iron hands poised ready.
“Tony wait!” the two watched in fascination as Steve turned back to Bucky, who had stopped and was staring at Steve’s neck. He watched as Bucky brought his metal hand up to run his fingers over his own Bond Mark while reaching out with his flesh hand to touch Steve’s. Bucky’s eyes welled with tears and he looked up at him as his eyes slowly shifted into amber.
“A-Alpha?” Steve allowed his eyes to shift black, growling comfortingly as he slowly moved towards him.
“Yes, yes Omega. You figured it out. You’re so smart, my clever Omega” Bucky’s lower lip began to tremble and he looked back at him.
“I’m yours?” Steve nodded as tears fell unchecked from his eyes.
“Yeah babydoll, I’m yours, and you’re mine” Bucky began shaking as his gaze locked with Steve’s.
“We’re Mates?” Steve nodded, moving the hand still on his neck up to the side of his face so he could press his lips to it, peppering his palm with kisses.
“Yes, yes Omega. You and me, always” Bucky looked down and spoke in an almost childlike manner.
“I got lost” Steve pulled him close and brushed the long tresses out of his face tenderly.
“You did, for a long, long time. But you’re here now, you’re here with me again and you’re safe.” Bucky flexed his hands nervously over Steve’s grey Henley and he looked up at him.
“D-did you look for me?” Steve let out a sob and nodded.
“I did, I never stopped. Even when I thought you were dead. I looked for you in every face I saw, in every laugh I heard, in every hand I touched. And I am so sorry it took me so long to find you. But I promise you from the moment I lost you I never stopped looking” Bucky blinked and tears slid down his dirty cheeks.
“Th-they made me forget. I-I don’t want to forget” Steve shook his head vehemently.
“No one is ever going to touch you again Bucky, you won’t forget again. No more chair, none of it. It’s over now babydoll, it’s all over now” Bucky leaned up and the two nuzzled their noses together.
“I swear it. I will kill them all before they get the chance” Bucky finally sunk into his arms, scenting Steve as the Alpha scented him in turn. When the shaking got to be too much, Steve took his newly augmented weight and slowly lowered them both to the floor. Bucky finally began to cry and it triggered Steve’s own release.
“I got you, my beautiful, perfect Omega. You’re with me now, I’ll fix it. I’ll fix all of it.” Bucky clung to him and crawled into his lap as he had always done, running on instinct of decades long past.
“I missed you, I didn’t know it was you but I missed you. My Steve, my Alpha” Steve stroked his hair as he rocked them gently. Steve remained silent, merely pressing kisses to the side of his head, but internally he was thanking every deity he could think of.
Even Loki got a thank you.
“Let’s get you home and cleaned up yeah? Then we can make us a nice nest where no one will bug us” Bucky nodded into his neck as he continued to shiver uncontrollably, likely coming out of shock.
Steve scooped up the enhanced man like he was nothing, carrying him through the doors, ignoring Tony’s spluttering and Bruce’s feeble attempts to call him back.
His Omega was home, everything else could be handled later.
Steve gently set Bucky down on the couch on his floor of the tower. The Omega still held his shirt as he looked around with wide eyes, moving the soft fabric between his fingers.
Steve knelt down between his legs and lightly rested his hands on his knees, looking up at him softly.
“Are you hungry? Maybe we should have some water hmm?” Bucky looked at him nervously and let out a panicked whine as Steve went to stand, gripping his shirt tightly. Steve sighed and cocked his head to the side.
“S’okay baby, we can go together okay?” Bucky nodded and slowly climbed to his feet with Steve, reminding him of how clingy he’d been after Azzano. He gently led Bucky into the kitchen, turning on the soft stove light as opposed to the full ceiling. Bucky kept curled into his side, watching his surroundings as Steve slowly moved to the fridge, he opened the door when his eyes followed Bucky’s to the little snowflake on the side. Steve let his eyes drift shut and moved them back away from the fridge, going for tap water instead.
“Here we go Buck, drink up okay?” Bucky looked at him hesitantly but slowly sipped the water. Steve counted it as a win.
“Why don’t you go shower and I’ll make us some soup?” Bucky shook his head and pressed his face into Steve’s neck.
“Stay with Alpha” Steve gritted his teeth, half in frustration and half in rage at what his Mate had been reduced to. What Hydra had reduced him to. He buried his face in Bucky’s stringy hair and pressed his lips to the top of his head, ignoring the stale smell and focusing on the bonfire and ocean breeze that he knew so well.
“Yeah babydoll, stay with me” he murmured gently and slowly led him through the room as he cooked silently. It wasn’t the most comfortable way to move around, but Steve would be damned of he let him go again.
“Bucky, baby, you need to shower” Bucky looked up at the showerhead with worried eyes, fear creeping out of his scent in tiny tendrils.
“B-but you said I was a good Omega?” Steve looked at him in confusion before the memory of Bucky’s file paraded into his mind.
When difficult, Asset responds well to Waterboarding.
Steve let out his own whine and began stripping himself.
“C’mere, why don’t we shower together? That way we’re both safe” the word seemed to act as a balm over both of them as Steve gently turned the spray on. Bucky looked up at him nervously and gently flexed his hand on Steve’s pec.
“Safe?” Steve smiled warmly and nodded, growling gently as he stepped into the water, guiding Bucky in next to him. The moment the warm water hit the Omega his eyes widened and he looked at Steve in shock. Steve could hear his own heart breaking and plastered on a bright smile.
“See? Nice and warm!” Bucky’s eyes shone as he slowly loosened his grip on his arm as Steve pulled him under the spray. Bucky suddenly let out a surprised giggle and Steve felt his smile becoming more and more real by the second.
“S’warm” Bucky laughed again and Steve felt his own giggles forming as he pulled him into his chest, wrapping his arms around him as Bucky purred happily. Steve buried his face into his neck and pressed soft kisses to his Bonding Glands. Bucky wrapped his arms around him and the two swayed back and forth under the water. Bucky pulled back and the two looked at each other under the water.
“I remember you” Steve froze and looked at him, bringing his hands up to frame Bucky’s face as he ran his thumbs over his lower lip, pulling it down slightly as he leaned into Bucky’s space, sharing his air.
“I did bad things Steve” Steve shook his head and closed his eyes.
“I killed people – lots of people” their lips ghosted over one another and Steve groaned.
“I don’t care” Steve murmured as he finally, finally sealed his lips over his Mate’s again. Bucky let out a long whine and pushed back against him, kissing him back passionately.
“I missed you. I missed you so fucking much it was like part of me died. I don’t care about what you did – what they made you do. We’re going to start over, you and me okay?” Bucky didn’t vocalize a reply, but if his scent and whine was anything to go off of, Steve felt it was safe to assume they were in the same boat.
“What do you think?” Bucky looked cautiously around the bedroom, eying the nest Steve had built on the bed. Steve caught the hesitation and quirked an eyebrow nervously.
“What’s wrong?” Bucky bit his lip nervously and looked at him.
“S’just, it’s a lot of windows” Steve looked over at the wall of floor to ceiling grass looking over the Manhattan skyline and mentally kicked himself.
To Bucky, they were easy targets.
“You’re right Buck, not a whole lot of cover here is there” Steve hummed as he wracked his brain over what to do.
“It’s fine – it’s okay really, I’m just bein-“ Steve held up a finger and suddenly charged across the room, flinging open the door to-
“How about we move the nest in here?” Bucky gaped as he looked over Steve’s shoulder, staring into the large walk in closet.
The nest would fit perfectly.
Steve didn’t give Bucky a chance to respond before he moved the nest from the bed into the closet, dragging over a reading lamp. He shrugged off his white sleepshirt and turned to look at the Omega with kind eyes.
“How’s this?” Bucky’s eyes filled with tears as he looked down at it.
“Y-yeah, yeah Alpha it’s amazing, it’s perfect” Steve gently pulled him into the nest, moving the softness around him to cradle his Mate before climbing in himself and pulling him close. Bucky gave a rueful smile and rested his hand on his neck.
“Sorry to make you sleep in the closet” Steve ran his fingers through his hair.
“Never apologize to me for this, for any of this. I have you back, nothing else matters.” Bucky’s tears finally welled over and he flared his nostrils as he tried to remain calm. Steve pulled him flush against him and wrapped him in a bear hug.
“I think that tonight. We should just lay here, and be together. And if we need to cry, I think we should do that too. So don’t you worry about being strong for me babydoll. You’re safe, and if safe means that you need to cry. I will stay right here and hold you while it happens.” Bucky nodded shakily and pressed his face into the hollow of Steve’s neck, like he always did, and locked his arms around his waist.
“You too Alpha, we can hold each other.” Steve let his own tears finally fall and he sniffed, kissing Bucky again as they curled together and wept.
Even as he lay there on the floor in his closet, bawling his eyes out, Steve had never felt more happy or content than laying there in a nest with his Omega again.
Suddenly, Steve didn’t hate New York anymore.
The two stayed in the nest for the better part of a week. Bucky may have remembered Steve, but with that came memories of the past seventy years of Hell he’d gone through. The nightmares would scare Steve as much as they scared Bucky, his screams jerking Steve back into consciousness in a way that had him wanting to grab for his shield every time.
“Hungry?” Bucky nodded and Steve gently crawled out of the nest, Bucky following closely behind. However, this time, instead of Bucky following him into the kitchen, he branched off into the living room. Steve smiled at the fact that his Omega could now be more than a few feet away from him as he began cooking.
“What are you hungry for?” there was no reply from the living room and Steve furrowed his brow in confusion.
“Hey babe, what are you hungry fo-“ Steve froze as he walked into the living room.
Steve had been in such a hurry, he hadn’t cleaned up before he went to Siberia, his living room was still scattered with the pamphlets from the different houses in Carrol Gardens.
The one he’d made the offer on lay open proudly on the coffee table. The brownstone boasted high ceilings, modern amenities and the two selling factors Steve had found blaring on the open pages.
The fully equipped nesting suite comes with mini-fridge, sanitary station and nourishment storage compartment. The carpeted flooring has an additional 2.5 inches of foam to separate carpet from hardwood to ensure the upmost comfort. The room is equipped with a scent-proof ventilation system to maintain air circulation without making Heats or Ruts known to neighbouring tenants.
Steve knew that one could be played off easily enough, he just wanted Bucky to have a safe place. But there was no coming back from page 13.
Full-sized nursery suitable for litters up to four pups. Boasts natural lighting and sliding panel for immediate access from Master bedroom. Padded floors similar to the nesting suite, along with a slightly sunken corner which allows for Omegas to make proper nests for pups without security concerns.
Bucky’s hand was resting on his abdomen over the scar from his sterilization surgery. He bit his lip as he stared down at it and Steve could smell the devastation coming off his Mate in waves.
“Bucky, I am so sorry. I should’ve thrown those away-“ Bucky turned to him and Steve could see the Omega collapsing back, all of the progress they’d made slipping away.
“…I wanted pups…” the brunette sniffed, his voice sounding so small that Steve barely recognized it. The Captain stepped up to the Omega and looked down at the table with tear filled eyes.
“I know Buck” Bucky turned to his Alpha as a tear escaped his eye.
“They said that I was a bad Omega, and bad Omegas aren’t allowed to have families” another tear escaped Bucky’s eye as his hand rested over the scar on his abdomen.
“That’s not true baby doll” Bucky looked at him and quirked a lip up sadly.
“They said that I was a liability if I was fertile, so they fixed me. Then they said that I was a faulty Omega” Steve felt a lump in his throat, remembering how Bucky’s dad had called him that often when they were younger. He slowly moved forward and wrapped an arm around his waist.
“You’re perfect Buck. There’s nothing wrong with you” Bucky started to shake his head and Steve lowered them onto the couch.
“Do you remember when we first Mated, in ’39?” Bucky shook his head as guilt poured from him and Steve immediately began shushing him.
“It’s okay, it’s okay, it was a long time ago” Bucky’s scent began to calm under Steve’s consolation and he smiled gently.
“When we Mated, I was so sick I was sterile, we couldn’t have a litter of our own. I was convinced that that made me a bad Alpha, and that you were wasting your time with me. You were livid and built this tiny nest in our bedroom closet and I wasn’t allowed in for days” the two shared a small laugh and Bucky looked at him as he continued speaking gently.
“I started crying and told you that I didn’t think I deserved you anymore. You finally let me into that damn nest and you told me that you’d rather have me, than have your own pups, and that there were other ways to have a family” Bucky wiped his eyes and Steve smiled and rested their foreheads together.
“I would rather have you, James Buchanan Barnes, than have my own pups. It’s the 21st century. We can find another way to have a family” Bucky sniffed and squeezed his hand.
“Really?” Steve nodded emphatically and kissed him delicately.
“Let’s get you healed, then we’ll have a family. Does that sound okay Omega?” Bucky nodded and looked back at the brownstone pamphlet.
“And move to Carrol Gardens?” Steve laughed and nodded.
“Yeah, we’ll move to Carrol Gardens” Bucky let out an excited laugh and kissed him again, standing up and pulling Steve with him.
“M’still hungry Alpha” Steve grinned and wrapped his arms around him from behind, shuffling them into the kitchen.
“Then let’s eat!”
“Hey Tony, it’s Steve. I’m sorry to do this, but is there any chance that place in Carrol Gardens is still available” Bucky stared at him with wide eyes as he talked on the phone.
“Come on Capsicle, you really think I pulled that offer out? It’s waiting for you” Steve sighed and winked at Bucky who was looking at him in confusion from his position at the kitchen table.
“Thanks Tony, I owe you one.”
“You always do” Steve hung up and looked at his Mate with a gentle eyes.
“After lunch, would you like to come to Carrol Gardens with me Omega? Look at our new place before going to see Dr. Banner” Bucky’s smile erupted like the sun and he nodded.
“Yes Alpha” Steve pulled him up into his arms and kissed him slowly. Bucky wrapped his arms around him and purred into the embrace, kissing him back passionately.
“Let’s do this the right way this time huh?” Bucky smiled against his lips and nodded, kissing him again.
“Sounds good pal”
Bucky held Steve’s hand tightly as they walked into the cozy brownstone. Steve allowed himself to let out a quiet but continuous growl, maintaining a constant presence next to his healing Mate as they explored.
He’d kept it bare, hoping that the empty place would help trigger Bucky’s basic domestic instincts. He remembered how much Bucky had loved arranging and rearranging their little apartment in Red Hook and he hoped the blank slate would help encourage him.
“Whattya think Buck?” the amber in Bucky’s eyes burned through his slate orbs as he looked at his Alpha in barely concealed excitement.
“C-can I paint it?” Steve nodded and came up behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist and resting his chin on his shoulder, kissing his ear softly.
“We can do whatever we want with it honey, it’s ours” he could smell Bucky’s excitement and grinned, finally beginning to let his own scent mingle into the apartment. Bucky hummed and turned his head to face him.
“What do I smell like?” Steve furrowed his brow in confusion.
“Pardon?” Bucky snickered in spite of himself and pressed back against his Alpha.
“I mean, you smell like citrus and the sun. Is that what I smell like?” Steve laughed through his nose and nuzzled the faded but clear Bond Mark affectionately.
“No, you smell so much better. You smell like bonfire and sea air” Bucky blushed and turned into his arms.
“Can we go get paint? I know what I want” Steve beamed and kissed him gently.
“Of course Omega, anything you want” Bucky purred and the two kissed briefly again before Steve continued the tour of the house.
By the time the two finally moved into the brownstone, Bucky was down to three therapy sessions a week, his arm had been replaced by Tony and his dry attitude was beginning to shine through again.
They were still waiting for their bed to come in, and Steve had spared no expense when he’d found a store in Switzerland that still manufactured the old nesting kits they’d tried to save up for back in 1941. But with the rest of the brownstone completely finished, the two had readily agreed that they wanted out of the Avengers Tower and into their house.
One thing stayed constant though. Bucky had made exactly one demand since his return.
The nursery stayed locked and untouched.
Steve stopped in the doorway to the living room as he watched Bucky settle in. The two deciding to bunk out in the living room for the few days until their bed arrived – courtesy of Stark Industries.
Bucky’s hair was tied back in a loose ponytail, a few wisps falling into his face and Steve’s t-shirt and sweatpants hugging him perfectly as he fussed around with various pillows, cushions and blankets.
“They forgot the soy sauce” Bucky snorted as Steve stood at the edge of the nest, unsure of his welcome yet. Bucky grabbed the takeout from him and patted the space next to him.
“Good, too much salt is bad for you” Steve grabbed the remote and sat down, grinning when Bucky immediately settled against him, shoulders, hips and legs pressing together. Steve turned on the TV and left it on some stand-up comedy channel as he turned to Bucky, who was now inhaling his kung-pao chicken. The two sat in a comfortable silence before Steve spoke softly.
“Bruce called, you walked out of therapy today” there was no judgment in Steve’s tone, but the slight Alpha lit in his voice let Bucky know he had to answer. Bucky remained silent for several minutes, but Steve knew his Omega better than to push, knowing that he’d never disobey his Alpha’s tone.
“S-she wanted to talk about my surgery” Steve was sure his scent revealed how his heart broke as Bucky stared down at his chicken.
“I said I didn’t want to talk about it, and she tried to use an Alpha voice with me” Steve bit back a snarl, he and Bruce were going to be having a serious conversation, and Bucky would be acquiring a new – Beta – therapist.
“I’m so sorry Bucky” Bucky swallowed thickly and leaned against Steve.
“I know you said there’s other ways to have a family. But it still hurts and I don’t want to talk about it” Steve laced their fingers together and squeezed his hand.
“And that’s perfectly okay honey. Here, let’s not talk about it anymore hmm? Let’s just watch TV” Bucky nodded and curled in next to him.
“Yes Alpha” Steve rumbled at the answer and felt Bucky automatically purr against him.
“Thank you for telling me Buck. M’so proud of you” Bucky purred again and nuzzled closer, eyes drifting shut as Steve ran a hand through his hair, turning back to the TV, only half watching as he focused on the feeling of the dozing Omega next to him.
It was almost surreal, Bucky lounging in his arms on a quiet Saturday night watching TV in their little brownstone. Steve kissed the top of his head and whispered softly into his hair.
“Thank you for coming back to me” Bucky remained unresponsive, but cooed in his sleep and rolled to press his face against the hollow of Steve’s throat, arms looping around his abdomen. Steve peppered light kisses to the top of his head and smiled softly before turning the TV off, lowering the two of them into the nest Bucky’d built on the floor. Bucky nestled into his arms and purred, Steve tightened his arms around him and smiled into his hair as he closed his eyes. Omegas only purred continuously in their sleep when they were truly content, like cats.
He hadn’t heard Bucky purr like this since 1939.
Steve rested his chin on his head and relaxed into the pillows, feeling his own rumble begin in his chest as he drifted off to sleep.
Steve’s eyes shot open as an all too familiar scent invaded his lungs. He breathed in deeply and jerked his head back as he stared as his Mate, who was slowly beginning to stir as well.
The lavender scent began to permeate the room and Bucky looked up at him with confused amber eyes. Steve felt his own eyes going black and his own scent of cedarwood beginning to slide out of his own pores.
Bucky’s brows furrowed and he gently gripped Steve’s shirt in his metal hand.
“Alpha?” Steve moved to kiss him gently and forced himself to remain calm.
“S’okay Omega, m’right here” Bucky let out a feral whine at Steve’s deep Alpha tone and Steve let out his own groan.
Bucky was going into Heat.
Some smut, but not too much, that comes laterrrr ;)
“I don’t know isn’t good enough Bruce!” The Captain roared, causing Clint to step forward quickly. The Omega archer was keenly aware of the uncomfortable whines and scent emitting from the exam room and knew just how stable the Alpha wasn’t as a result.
“Calm down Cap-“
“Don’t tell me what to do!” Steve boomed in his Alpha tone, eyes still black. Clint recoiled instantly, eyes shifting amber as Steve was suddenly knocked stumbling.
“Never speak to my Omega like that again. Do I make myself clear” Natasha’s eyes were pitch black, her red hair falling into her eyes as she bared her teeth as she planted herself between Clint and Steve. Tony stepped quickly between the two and looked at Steve with a firm gaze.
“Now that we’ve had our own little Alpha battle – let’s get back to what’s actually important. Capsicle, can you get him stabilized” Steve gaped and turned beet red as Tony mercifully didn’t keep eye-contact.
“What do you mean?” Tony rolled his eyes and groaned.
“I need you to go in there – get your Mate off so he can calm down so I can do some tests to figure out why the Hell a sterilized Omega is in Heat” Steve choked a little and suddenly shrunk back down. The group stood in a tense silence until another angry moan erupted from the exam room.
“Well?” Steve swallowed thickly.
“D-do you have a private room?” Bruce stepped forward quietly.
“We set up a nesting suite on your old floor” Steve nodded and Natasha snarled out, still protective.
“You won’t run into anyone, I’ve assured the hallway is clear” Steve rumbled in appreciation and apology, moving quickly out the door.
“Alpha!” Bucky was on him the moment he stepped into the room, scenting him aggressively as he held him tightly. Steve growled and gripped him tightly, scenting him back.
“Shh, you’re okay. You gunna let me take care of you Omega?” Bucky whimpered and leaned his head back, exposing his neck and Bond Mark. Steve worried his teeth over it lightly, feeling Bucky’s knees buckle.
“Please Alpha” Steve pressed chaste kisses along his neck and jawline before coming back to rest their foreheads together.
“Let’s go upstairs, gotta nice little spot for us okay? Get you taken care of before we figure out what’s going on yeah?” Bucky moaned a reply, swaying into the Alpha’s space as Steve held him firmly, beginning to steer him towards the door.
Steve snarled as Bucky pushed back against him again, rubbing obscenely against Steve’s hard cock. He leaned his had back against the elevator as Bucky turned around, grinding against him and panting into his ear.
“Please, please Alpha I need it, need your cock Alpha” Steve kissed him fiercely and breathed a sigh of relief when the elevator dinged at their floor. Steve shoved Bucky into the apartment and bent him over the first surface he could find, tugging the Omegas pants down and immediately running his finger between Bucky’s slick cheeks.
“Look at you Buck, so wet for me already” Bucky let out a high-pitched whine and Steve immediately replied with a growl.
“S-Steve…” Steve saw Bucky’s eyes briefly clear and he spoke quickly.
“Baby I can’t knot you yet okay?” Bucky whimpered and his eyes filled with tears.
“Y-you don’t want me?” Steve shook his head immediately. He’d known this was going to go this way.
“Oh God, Bucky, Omega I want you more than anything, but we need to figure out what’s going on okay? Remember, you’re not supposed to be having Heats anymore” Bucky nodded but Steve could tell he was losing him again.
“So I’m going to make you feel good baby-doll, then we’re going to figure this out” Bucky nodded as his eyes went amber again and he pulled Steve into a filthy kiss, hopping back onto the table and pulling Steve in between his legs, kicking his pants off. Steve pivoted him back slightly and hiked his leg up around his waist, sliding a finger into his Mate’s welcoming hole easily. Bucky crooned and Steve felt his eyes fill with tears as Bucky began mouthing at his neck, right hand rhythmically scratching at his hair. He tucked his face down into Bucky’s neck in turn and began to rut himself against Bucky’s other leg.
Never in his life did Steve think he’d get this again. Never did he think he would ever have someone in his arms like this – let alone Bucky. He was convinced that he would spend the rest of his life alone, Ruts with nothing more than his hand and the memory of piercing slate eyes. He never even wanted to be with anyone else. And now here he was, on his old floor in present day Manhattan with his Mate, his Bucky in his arms-
“S’okay Stevie, m’here Alpha” Steve blinked and as he came back to himself he realized he was crying. He pulled back and sniffed as Bucky’s hands came up to frame his face, the two kissed again as Steve added another finger, crooking his fingers in the way he knew Bucky liked and was rewarded with a low moan and watching Bucky’s eyes roll back as his first orgasm ripped through him. Steve jerked against him again and felt his own orgasm crash over him, causing his knees to buckle.
Steve rang two more orgasms out of his Mate before Bucky was back to himself enough to be maneuvered back down to the labs. Steve initially dreaded heading back down, knowing Tony would be ready with the taunts and jeers.
Only to be shocked when Tony very docilely stepped forward, extending his hands to the Omega calmly.
“Why don’t we sit you down here where you’ll be more comfortable?” Bucky nodded and sat down on the exam table as Bruce came up with the scanners, Steve waiting in the wings with watchful eyes.
“How’s he holding up?” Steve looked over as Natasha silently walked up next to him, eyes on the Omega sitting in the exam room. Natasha noted that Bucky seemed calm, but the fact that his eyes never once left Steve’s through the window and how he was holding himself ramrod straight told the spy everything she needed to know.
The Omega wasn’t calm at all.
Steve crossed his arms over his chest and rubbed his thumb against his bottom lip.
“They gave him a sedative to stave off the Heat a little longer, but he’s scared. It surprised both of us” Natasha nodded and crossed he own arms.
“Understandable, this is the first time I’ve ever heard of a sterilization not taking” Steve could smell the sadness in the warm vanilla scent and sighed heavily. He turned his head and cleared his throat softly.
“I’m sorry for snapping at Clint, I was out of line” Natasha kept her gaze trained on the window as she replied.
“Yes, you were. But Clint knows better than to step in when an Alpha wants their Mate,” she quirked an eyebrow at him and smirked.
“He’s seen what I do when they get in my way” Steve chuckled in spite of himself as Natasha continued to smirk.
“We already talked about it, he’s okay. But if you don’t apologize to him I will slit your throat in your sleep” Steve smiled but nodded, knowing that the threat was just as real as it was in jest.
“The next time I see him, you have my word” she nodded and rested her hands on her hips before heading for the door.
“If you need anything…” she trailed off as she walked away and he nodded to himself before yelling out after her.
“Thanks Nat” there was no reply but Steve allowed himself to relax as he looked back into the exam room at his Omega, giving him a reassuring smile, watching his shoulders relax minutely at his Alpha’s presence. He quirked up a corner of his lip before glancing down at Bruce who was speaking to him softly, guiding him to lay down on the table as Tony exited the room.
“Steve, I need to ask you a few questions” there was no joking in Tony’s tone and Steve felt his heart begin to hammer nervously.
“Yeah, yeah okay” Tony gestured to the seats and Steve swallowed thickly.
Whatever Tony saw on the scans, it had him worried.
“Steve, all of Bucky’s reproductive organs have been removed with the exception of his uterus” Steve leaned forward on the seat and scrubbed a hand over his face as his eyes filled with tears again, lump in his throat.
Tony waited patiently until he was back together and continued speaking softly.
“Steve, I know this is hard, but I need you to focus okay. Do you remember when Bucky’s last Heat was?” Steve squeezed his eyes shut as he brought his brain back over seventy years.
“I need to know his cycle Steve, it’s very important” Steve growled and leaned back in his chair, lacing his fingers together and pressing them against his forehead as he focused.
“So what are we doing after we get Zola?” Steve furrowed his brow as he continued to look over reports.
“Thought we were going to Switzerland with the guys? In Geneva?” Bucky hummed and came up behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist.
“Maybe you and I could go to Zurich instead?” Steve glanced up and that’s when he saw the playful smile on his Mate’s lips. He grinned back and pulled him up against his.
“Oh? And why would we do that?” Bucky playfully nipped at him and grinned.
“My Heat’s coming up, I was thinking maybe…” Steve laughed playfully and kissed him teasingly.
“How long do you have?” Bucky shrugged and leaned his hip against the desk.
“About three weeks I’d wager” Steve nodded and stroked his side gently as his smile turned soft.
“Sounds good sweetheart, looking forward to it” the two shared another soft kiss and Bucky tapped his chest lightly.
“Should we head down to that briefing, you know, where we all learn how to zip-line onto speeding trains” Steve snorted and slapped his hip as they headed down to the War Room.
“It was supposed to be in December, about three weeks after he fell off the train” Tony nodded and looked at him.
“Is there any chance you’re off?” Steve furrowed his brow and began shaking his head, only to stop himself.
“No I don-wait, no. They put him on Suppressants when he got his Enlistment, and Zola he – he experimented on him, injected him with a bunch of stuff. So we weren’t sure. He’d gone into Heat in January, and we were trying to figure out his cycle,” Steve’s eyes went distant and he shook his head.
“Wait, that’s not right-“ Tony gently set a hand on his knee and looked at him.
“Steve, is it possible that Bucky was either in Heat or on the cusp of his Heat at the time he fell from the train?” Steve licked his lips and shrugged, rubbing his palms together.
“Could be, why?” Tony looked at him gently, knowing what he was about to say was going to deliver a blow.
“Steve, this is going to be Bucky’s last Heat. Because he has an egg in his uterus” Steve looked at him blankly as Tony spoke softly, finding his own voice filling with emotion.
“I don’t know how, but they missed it” Steve let out a sob and put his hands over his face as he stared at him.
“Does that mean...?” Tony gave him a smirk and nodded.
“We’re gunna wrap this up as soon as possible. Who knows, maybe we’ll have a little assassin running around” Steve let out a wet laugh and nodded as Tony stood.
“I’m gunna go help Banner finish up, then we’ll get you home okay?” Steve nodded and watched as Tony rushed back into the exam room, a new zeal in his step as he closed the door.
Steve watched as they finished up with Bucky, giving him one last sedative to last him until Steve could get them back to Brooklyn.
Now that the haze of shock was gone, reality was firing its way into his brain. They had one shot at their own family. One.
And Bucky wasn’t even remotely healed yet.
He watched as Tony explained the situation to his Mate. Steve noticed that other than a quick widening of his eyes, Bucky remained stoic. Bruce finished giving Bucky the last sedative injection and the two scientists stepped out, each eying Steve as he slowly walked into the room.
“Hey…” Bucky looked up at his Alpha with wide eyes as he slowly entered the room, walking up and standing in between the Omega’s legs, resting his hands on his upper thighs. Bucky bit his lip and looked up at him, his eyes were glazed and sleepy from the sedative but Steve could see the sparkle like no one’s business. He gently gripped Steve’s forearms and looked up at him.
“Alpha… D-did they tell you?” Steve nodded and moved to rest his forehead against his.
“Yeah, yeah Omega they did” the two stayed pressed together for several minutes before Steve spoke softly again into their shared air.
“What do you wanna do Buck? Following your lead here pal” he could sense his Mate’s indecision and let out a comforting growl.
“M’not better, not even close”
“But we don’t get another one” Steve nodded and squeezed his hands involuntarily
“Not like this” Bucky let out a high-pitched whine and gripped his Mate’s shirt.
“Alpha…” Steve scented the brunette gently and spoke softly.
“What do you want to do baby, I’m happy no matter what” Bucky nuzzled their noses together and sighed deeply.
“I-I wanna try. Wanna have pups with you” Steve let out a growl and pulled away, looking into his eyes.
“That’s what you want?” Bucky held eye-contact and nodded, biting his lip nervously.
“I know I’m not – that I – I could be a good Den Mother Steve, I know I can” Steve smiled and kissed him gently.
“I know you can baby doll, I don’t doubt it at all. Let’s get home okay? Get you home and safe huh?” Bucky keened at the assurance and surged against Steve’s lips, pulling himself away and nodding.
“Yeah, before this wears off” Steve snorted and helped him to his feet, paying no attention to anyone else as he rushed him back down to the car, buckling his Omega in protectively before rushing over to the other side and hopping in before starting the car and jetting onto the busy Manhattan streets, praying that traffic would continue moving. Bucky reached over and laced their fingers together on the consul, looking at him with big eyes.
“This is what you want, right Steve?” Steve looked over at him and gave him a blinding smile, turning his eyes back to the road briefly as he brought their joined hands to his lips and kissed it, holding it there for several moments as he headed towards the exit for the Brooklyn Bridge.
“Buck, I didn’t even think I’d get to see you again. There’s nothing I don’t want with you” he turned back to Bucky and allowed his eyes to fill with excited tears.
“This is our second chance Buck, m’not wasting another moment with you” a tear escaped Bucky’s eye and he smiled back softly.
“I love you Steve” Steve kissed their joined hands again and turned onto their street, beelining for their brownstone.
“I love you too Bucky”
Bucky let out a feral moan as Steve slammed him against the hallway of their brownstone, kicking in the delivery box of the nesting supplies which had been delivered while they were gone. Steve would set it up later, right now though he needed to get inside.
"Alpha more, yes, yes" Bucky groaned as Steve feverishly kissed down his neck, Steve fumbled with the Omega’s pants and the two stepped out of them, still clad in their shirts and jackets. Steve could see the makeshift nest still on the floor of the living room, but made no move to get them over to it. Bucky’s lavender scent was back in full force as he stared at his Alpha with molten eyes.
"Please, don’t stop" Bucky sighed as Steve pressed him back into the wall, wrapping his legs around his Mate's waist. Steve quickly pumped a finger, then two into the Omega’s hungry body. Bucky nipped at Steve’s own Mark and growled passionately.
"Make love to me Stevie, please" he moaned as Steve ran his hand down his leg, Alpha’s heart melting at the gravelly Brooklyn drawl. Bucky leaned his head back, breathing heavily and running his hands through his Mate's hair. Steve couldn't help but smile at something that was so uniquely Bucky. Bucky was the only one who had ever made him feel so loved that nothing else mattered, not how skinny he’d been in the thirties, not how out of his depth he’d been during the war. Bucky’s always been a constant presence, like a lighthouse guiding him home with a soft hand through his hair, or a gentle cuff to the back of the head.
Nothing could take that from them, not decades or brainwashing or this new, exciting world Steve still didn’t fully understand. Bucky reached down and captured Steve's lips in a searing kiss before peppering his lips frantically with kisses.
"Tell me you love me, tell me I’m still yours" he half moaned half begged
"Bucky I love you, fuck I love you so much. Still mine baby, my good Omega, all mine. And I’m still yours, only ever been yours" he whispered over and over again, smiling softly at each whimper the former released with the kisses and nibbles that his partner delivered to his body.
"Now Alpha, I need you now" he gladly obliged, lifting Bucky up and pressing him further into the wall. Bucky wrapped his legs tighter around Steve's hips, groaning as he felt the head of his lover's swollen cock slowly breaching him.
"God Steve!" Steve peppered his neck with kisses and ran his hands along his chest and back. Once he was completely sheathed inside his body he held perfectly still, allowing his body to adjust to the intrusion. Bucky may be in Heat, but this was their first time together in almost a century, Steve needed to be careful.
"Move..." Steve did as he was told; slowly rocking his hips against his lover’s body. Steve held Bucky's hips firmly with one hand, the other gently stroking his lover's cock in time with his thrusts. Bucky rolled his head to the side, reaching up and tangling his hand into Steve's hair, Steve gently sucked at Bucky's neck, lavishing attention over the Bond Mark tenderly. Bucky let out a coo and turned to kiss the side of his head.
"Always so good baby, missed it so much, can’t believe I get this again" he snarled lovingly. Bucky smiled and pressed himself as close as he could to Steve's body
"Missed you, we’re together now, s’over Stevie" he turned his head so his forehead was against Steve's chin. Steve was nearing his own release, thrusting wildly and deeply into his love's body. Bucky slipped his hand across his own chest before grasping Steve's hand in his own.
"Alpha, I'm so close" he closed his eyes as Steve pressed his lips to Bucky's forehead
"M-me too Buck, gunna fill you up so good" Bucky pushed his hips back against Steve's frantically. He pulled him in for a passionate kiss as he came, crying Steve's name into his mouth as he spurted his juices all over his chest and Steve's hand, who then came, groaning Bucky's name into his own mouth. Bucky couldn't help the small smile or contented sigh that escaped him as he felt the warmth of Steve's seed filling him, his knot stretching his hole gently. Steve had tried to keep it closer to the rim for a quicker removal, not wanting to keep them pinned in the front hallway for several hours. They fell back against the wall together and Steve wrapped his arms around him, pulling him to his chest.
"Feel better?" Bucky laughed softly and nodded
"Much" he rested his head on Steve's chest and sighed, hugging his abdomen. “I love you Steve" Steve kissed the top of his head
"I love you too baby" Bucky cuddled up against him and closed his eyes.
Bucky watched from the nest in the living room as Steve rushed to their Nesting Suite. He knew he didn’t have much time before Bucky’s fever returned and he wanted to get them set up properly.
They’d never been able to do this before. He turned back as he walked into the kitchen to grab water and snacks as he began speaking to his Omega tenderly.
“I’m sorry I didn’t get the chance to scent or wash them properly. I just wanted- What are you doing Omega?” Bucky could hear the laughter in the Alpha’s voice as he looked at him.
Bucky was laying flat on his back in the nest, pillows under his naked hips and his legs straight up in the air against the sofa. He turned his head to look at his mate and smiled shyly.
“I read in RedBook once that tilting your hips helps with impregnation, gravity and all that” Steve snorted as his heart simultaneously melted and shattered. RedBook had gone out of print in the seventies and to Steve’s knowledge the “Susie-homemaker” style tips for pregnancy like that had gone out in the fifties apparently.
Bucky still remembered them, and wanted this to work so badly he was doing everything he could to get it to take.
“Besides, we never actually talked to Tony about it, so really we don’t even truly know how viable the egg really is Steve, so I’m just gunna do whatever I can to help it along” Steve softened and set his loot on the counter, coming to sit beside his Mate and running his hand through the long hair. Bucky had turned his head back up to look at the ceiling and smiled self-deprecatingly.
“Sounds kind of dumb out loud now huh, this probably isn’t even going to work” a rogue tear escaped from his eye and Steve smiled sadly. He could smell Bucky’s scent rising again and knew this conversation would be petering off soon for another several hours of blind passion.
“S’not dumb baby doll, we’ll call Tony after, get the details. You’re right, we can’t guarantee this’ll take. But I’m willing to do whatever it takes to see that it does and hopefully God’s on our side this time huh?” Bucky swallowed thickly and nodded, letting out a surprised laugh as Steve suddenly scooped him up, done with the heavy topics. He carried his Mate over to the counter so he could scoop up the snacks on the counter and carried them into the Suite.
Pure smut because hey my boo is in Heat.
The mood changed once they stepped into the Suite. Steve and Bucky looked at each other, neither wanting to break the spell. Steve set Bucky down and he stepped forward, gazing up at his Alpha as he grabbed Steve's hands in his, discarding the snacks into the nearby cubby and leading him towards the nest. Steve kicked the door closed out of habit and the noise woke them both up. Steve began to slowly pepper kisses down Bucky's neck, hands skilfully moving over his Mate’s body as his intoxicating lavender scent once again took over the dimly lit room. Bucky whined to protest the speed when he saw Steve's eyes, he wanted to take this slow, this was their first night together in decades and he didn't want to spoil it with a quick fuck. Bucky tilted his head to the side to give his Mate more access as he pushed Bucky down into the nest, their eyes blazing as Steve once again fell into the crevice of his Mate’s legs.
“Alpha, please” Steve framed Bucky’s face in his hands, kissing him gently as his Rut finally began to kick in, his skin burning up and Bucky groaned. His Alpha was everywhere, filling his senses in ways Bucky never even knew he’d missed. He clung to the broad shoulders as Steve rubbed their cocks together, leaning down and taking a nipple into his mouth. Bucky threw his head back and let out a ragged gasp, one arm gripping his Mate’s shoulder and the other diving his fingers into his hair. Steve began kissing down his body and Bucky finally felt his patience snap as his mind fogged over with the need to be claimed.
“Now Alpha” his voice growled out in a way Steve barely recognized and the Alpha barely had a chance to react before he found himself on his back, arms above his head as Bucky braced over him. The two sat there staring at each other for a moment and Steve felt a growl rumble in his throat as he moved his head to meet Bucky's lips again. Bucky began pressing kisses to every inch of Steve's skin, setting the blonde on fire. He inhaled sharply and looked at the ceiling, arching his back up, this was new. Bucky had always been more submissive in bed.
Clearly Steve had been too slow.
"B-Bucky..." Suddenly Bucky was above him, straddling him. Steve barely had time to register what was happening before his cock was being engulfed by Bucky's body.
"Ah, Steve… Alpha" Steve gaped up at him, eyes burning black as he placed his hands on Bucky's hips, rolling up to meet him.
"Oh god, yeah, shit baby…" Bucky moved his hips fluidly as Steve pistoned into him. Bucky splayed one hand on his Mate's chest, the other reaching up and running through his own hair as his head fell back, mouth hanging open.
"Steve, Steve Alpha, ah, shit I love you so much" Steve felt tears pricking his eyes as reality finally sank in. This was forever, they were finally together again. He got to wake up to that face every morning for the rest of his life.
"Bucky, oh god Buck-" he let out a sob and gazed up at the brunette's face, only to realize he was crying too. Bucky's body fell forward and he braced one hand on the headboard, the other grabbing the back of Steve's neck and leading him into a powerful kiss.
"I love you" he gasped out and lurched his body forward, using his abs to pull himself into a seating position, wrapping his arms around Bucky's waist and leading the other's over his shoulders. Bucky moaned at the angle change and panted into the Captain's ear
"Alpha-" he choked, walls clenching around Steve's member and he smiled, he wasn’t even going to touch Bucky's cock. the friction of it being trapped between their bodies and Bucky's whimpers let him know damn well how close he was.
"C'mon baby… c'mon" he whispered against his neck, looking down to watch himself disappear over and over again. "c'mon Bucky, don’t fight it baby, c'mon just let go, I'm here Omega, your Alpha’s here" Steve felt his knot catching again, burying himself into the hilt as it caught the rim of the rutting Omega. Bucky dug his nails into Steve's shoulders, letting out a feral scream and throwing his head back as he came. Steve flipped them over so Bucky was on his back, thrusting madly to his own release as Bucky continued to tremble with overstimulation.
"Steve, Alpha, honey you're so good, come inside me, c'mon Steve please I need it, let me feel you. Want your pups" he moaned low into Steve's ear, legs locked around Steve's waist. Steve let out a sob as heat began to pool in his belly again.
"Gah, Bucky, it's so good - I'm so close Omega-" Bucky panted into his ear and pressed his lips to his Bonding Mark, Steve grunted and the Omega bared his teeth.
"Come to me Alpha, give it to me" Bucky bit down on the Mark and Steve's mouth fell open in a silent scream. His whole body going stiff as a board as the most powerful orgasm he'd ever had ripped through his body like a freight train. Bucky keened and jerked against him, clenching his walls and milking him for all he was worth. Steve's arms gave out and he fell onto Bucky's chest, panting. Bucky's arms came up and curled around him, cradling him to his chest and whispering sweet nothings into his ear as his partner came down from his insane high. Steve rolled them over and gently brushed Bucky’s hair back, handing him a water bottle and praising him for sipping at it.
His knot was still buried deep into his Mate and would likely be there for several hours. Bucky nuzzled his nose against his as the two drifted off into an easy sleep.
“Capsicle! Back to reality so soon?!” Steve smirked as he looked down. He was sitting in the centre of the nest with his knees drawn up to his chest, Bucky was curled around his back, head resting by his right hip while his own pelvis was pressed against Steve’s left hip as he dozed lightly. Steve carded his hands through Bucky’s hair and spoke softly into the phone.
“Not quite yet Tony-“
“Gross” Steve rolled his eyes and spoke firmly into the phone.
“Alright, alright I’ll tease later. What can I do for you?” Steve sighed deeply and felt a tap on his hip, looking down to see Bucky blinking up at him.
“Can you make it so I can hear too?” Steve nodded, leaning down quickly to kiss his forehead as he flipped the phone onto Speaker-Mode. There was still so much of the 21st century his Mate didn’t understand.
“Can you hear me still?”
“Yep, still don’t know why you called, I’m assuming I’m on speaker with my favourite millennium man.” Bucky snorted and wiggled his fingers at the phone as he murmured softly.
“Hey Stark” he set his head down and guided Steve’s hand back into his long locks.
“We were wondering if you guys had figured out anything from Bucky’s tests?” there was movement on the other end of the line for several seconds before Tony spoke.
“How familiar are you with the Omega Heat Cycle?” Bucky let out a supportive purr as Steve’s guilt enclosed the room, pouring out of his pores in waves.
“S’okay Alpha” Steve swallowed thickly.
“Admittedly nowhere near enough, wasn’t deemed important back then” Tony made a disappointed sound and cleared his throat.
“Say no more, I’m sending all information on Omega biology to your tablet now and I’m sure anything they miss Sarge over there will fill you in on” Bucky nodded in agreement and Tony continued speaking.
“Anywho, so the way the Heat Cycle works is thus: Omegas go into Heats four times a year, this occurs when an egg is released from the tubes down into the uterus, the egg attaches and once it is in place a Heat is triggered and lasts anywhere from 3-5 days. If the Omega becomes pregnant the uterus begins to thicken and the miracle of life unfolds. However, if an egg isn’t fertilized, it merely disintegrates and is absorbed back into the blood stream.
Now all this being said, because the US Army used to provide Enlisted Omegas with suppressants, hormone imbalances would cause irregular cycling within Omegas, causing the post World War Two Baby Boom because all these Omegas came home and came off suppressants happy to see their Alphas-“ Steve felt Bucky curl tighter around him and he moved to wrap his arm around Bucky’s back, holding him as best he could given their position as they both felt a loss at the life they didn’t get.
“So as we had already established, James’ Cycle was already off. Additionally, because of what you were injected with at Azzano – which we now know was an imitation of Dr. Erskine’s formula that Steve-O here got. That would have caused a massive overhaul in hormones so you wouldn’t have the first clue on your Cycle back then even if you wanted to.
So now to the fun part. Based on your tests, the egg you currently have was dropped most likely the day before you fell off the train. So instead of your Heat being a month away like you two thought at the time it was actually only about three days away. However, because you fell and…” Tony trailed off and there was a long silence no one wanted to break before he cleared his throat before he continued speaking.
“Due to the freezing and unfreezing process, the egg was put into a state of stasis. But because this is the longest you’ve been out of Cryo, your body is moving along with its natural course. But because you no longer have the tubes, ovaries, etcetera, once this egg takes whichever path, that’s it, game over.” Bucky buried his face into Steve’s thigh as the gravity of this Heat once again engulfed them.
Sure, Steve would still have regular Ruts, but now Bucky wouldn’t have corresponding Heats.
This would be the last time this beautiful lavender scent ever graced Steve’s senses, the last time his Omega’s eyes would glow amber as he lay beneath him in passion.
Steve felt his throat get tight and Bucky suddenly spoke up softly.
“I still don’t understand, h-how do I even still have it when they removed everything else” Bucky truly had only meant it for Steve’s ears, but Tony spoke up again.
“Ah see, this is why I’m your favourite. I did some poking around and found the files of your time with – well not with us – and they have the record of your procedure. Apparently, your anesthesiologist wasn’t paying attention and you woke up halfway through the procedure. You managed to kill the lead surgeon, your anesthesiologist and three nurses before they got you under control so-to-speak. They just stitched you up and threw you back in because they were too scared to continue.” Bucky let out a mirthless chuckle and Steve’s nostrils flared as Bucky began to move against him, their lull ending.
“Thanks Tony, for everything. We gotta go but-“
“Say no more – I mean it, please don’t. Bye!” Bucky kissed Steve’s hip and Steve hung up the cellphone, throwing it out of the nest as he moved the Omega into his lap. Bucky cooed as they kissed languidly
“How you feeling baby doll?” Bucky smiled and nuzzled their noses together as he wiggled in Steve’s lap, erections rubbing together leisurely.
“Good Alpha, m’okay” Steve smiled up at him and his grin turned feral.
“You ready for me again?” Bucky nodded and crawled off of him, quickly presenting himself in the middle of the nest.
“Please Alpha” Steve kissed his back gently as he mounted him again, all thoughts of anything other than his Omega leaving him in an instant.
маленький паук - Little Spider
“Steve…” Steve blinked his eyes open at the soft voice of his Mate. His knot had gone down at some point during the night and he had slipped out of him. Steve was laying on his back in the nest with Bucky curled against his side, his metal arm draped across Steve’s abdomen with his left leg over his hip and his head resting on Steve’s collar. Steve smiled and sighed through his nose as he turned his head to face him.
“Hey doll” Bucky smiled and his eyes filled with tears as he nuzzled him gently.
“S’all over sweetheart, it’s done” Steve was surprised at the unexpected thickness in his throat as his own eyes filled with tears. He brought his hand up and stroked his hair as he flared his nostrils, catching the faint trails of lavender for the last time. Bucky let out a purr and Steve gave him a sad smile.
“Are you happy?” Bucky nodded and leaned up as they kissed gently, letting Steve wipe his rogue tears away.
“Yeah, yeah I am. It was good Stevie” Steve nodded and pulled him back down to his chest, running his hand up and down his arm as they lay together. Soon Steve would get up and massage Bucky’s aching body, reminding the Omega gently of when he’s told Steve that it’s what Omega’s needed post-Heat when they were kids, and how he’d held onto the information right up until when they’d Mated. It had always been Bucky’s favourite part.
Steve was brought out of his reverie with Bucky’s soft tone.
“What happens now Alpha?” Steve rested their foreheads together as he traced designs on his shoulder. He let out a comforting rumble and closed his eyes.
“Now we wait” Bucky nodded and burrowed into his arms, the two refusing to re-enter the real world quite yet.
“Hey” Steve looked up as the front door to the brownstone opened and Natasha’s voice echoed through. Bucky was still asleep in the Nesting Suite and Steve was preparing a pitcher of sugar water and thinking of what to make for breakfast as it was the first time he’d been out of the Suite in almost six days.
“Hey – what’s that?” Natasha raised her arms with the two bags of groceries and set them on the counter.
“Clint couldn’t come with me, but he helped me pick out some Omega friendly post-Heat grub for you both. I threw some post-Rut Protein in there too” the two shared a knowing look and Steve gestured to the coffee-maker.
“Well, if you don’t mind throwing some in my coffee, help yourself to the joe” Natasha snorted and moved around him, pulling down two mugs of coffee.
“Joe? Your age is showing Rogers” he snorted and quirked an eyebrow at her playfully.
“You gunna cause problems Romanov, or are you gunna make the damn coffee?” she let out a laugh and pulled out the protein powder as the coffee began to brew.
"He lives" Natasha looked up from where she was sitting at the dining room table as the soft, stumbling steps of a very groggy Bucky came into the kitchen, she peeked in the window as Bucky walked into the room, eyes still half lidded and a great case of bed head. Steve smiled and cocked his head slightly as Bucky came up behind him, wrapping his arms around his waist and resting his chin on his shoulder
"Mmm, mornin’'" Steve turned his head and kissed his temple, scenting him lightly before going back to the stove
"Morning Omega, how'd you sleep?" Bucky pulled away and leaned a hip on the island and crossed his arms
"Good, I like the nesting kit, feels safe" he smirked and looked up at Steve as the Alpha growled happily as he stepped into the Captain’s chest.
"Nat here?" her eyes widened in surprise as Steve chuckled and nodded.
"Always could smell everyone in the room couldn’t you? She’s in the living room, probably listening in to be honest" Natasha smirked into her coffee cup as Bucky hummed.
“Do you remember Nat?” the female Alpha’s ears perked as Bucky spoke softly.
“Sort of? I talked about her in therapy, I think she was a kid though?” Steve made a soft mmhmm sound and Natasha decided to enter the kitchen again.
"Good morning Yasha" Bucky's eyes shone as he threw her a soft smile, scent automatically filling the room with the comforting aura that Natasha remembered from their times together.
“Good morning маленький паук” Natasha felt her eyes fill with tears and she bit her lip, swallowing thickly. Steve looked between the two and quietly backed out of the kitchen, trying to give them a moment.
Bucky cocked his head to the side and gently extended his metal arm, the one he knew she was actually more comfortable with. Natasha slowly moved forward and gently embraced him as tears filled her eyes.
“I missed you” Bucky tightened his arms around her and buried his face into her hair and suddenly she was fourteen again.
“You saved me Tasha” she let out a sniff and found herself burying her face into the large chest.
“But I didn’t save you”
“S’not true-“ she growled but as it always did when she was young it came out too soft to have an affect. She could never use her Alpha voice on Yasha, and his answering purr brought her right back to the roof of the Red Room. She moved her arms around his waist and set her head on his pec as he stroked her hair, the two standing in a comfortable silence before he let out a wet laugh.
“I came to see if you were okay, if you guys needed anything – and now I’m the one crying” Bucky let out a comforting sound unique only to Omegas and Natasha felt herself melt back into the embrace.
“You don’t have to hide from me Tasha, we’re okay. It’ll be okay” she nodded as Steve slowly stepped back into the kitchen, rubbing her back gently before moving to the stove and looking at Bucky.
“So who wants breakfast?”
After two weeks and no changes, Steve finally accepted defeat. Bucky however wouldn’t stop, continuously buying pregnancy tests and repeatedly calling Bruce to run the bloodwork just one more time. Bruce always did, and the bloodwork always came back the same.
It didn’t take.
Steve slowly stepped into the brownstone as quietly as he could, carrying the bag of groceries and setting them on the counter.
“Hey Buck?” When there was no reply Steve felt concern begin to pull at his belly-button. When Bucky had declined to accompany him to the store, he hadn’t really thought anything of it. Now that he’d been gone for two hours however and there wasn’t even the scent of his Mate, his nerves were becoming frayed.
“Bucky? You home baby doll?” Steve began to walk briskly through the brownstone, beginning to let out a low, angry growl as he rushed up the stairs.
“Bu-“ he froze as he looked in the bedroom.
The bed was completely stripped, right down to the bare mattress and their linen closet was empty.
Along with Steve’s half of the closet.
Steve rushed down the hallway towards the Nesting Suite and flung the door open.
“Bucky?” beneath the mountain of blankets a pair of deep amber eyes pierced him and he furrowed his brow as Bucky let out a low whine.
“Alpha” Steve immediately kicked off his shoes and crawled in, wrapping his arms around his Mate and trying to make his scent as comforting as possible. The two scented each other for several minutes when Bucky finally spoke, his voice gravelly and soft.
“Don’t feel good” Steve flared his nostrils trying to figure out from the Omega’s scent what was wrong but he couldn’t notice anything. He kissed his forehead and murmured gently.
“Does your head hurt?” Bucky shook his head and buried his face into Steve’s chest.
“S’my stomach” Steve furrowed his brow and gently prodded at the brunette’s toned abdomen and Bucky whimpered. Steve rumbled an apology and moved back up to stroke his hair.
“Did you talk to Bruce about it?” Bucky shook his head and closed his eyes.
“Didn’t want anymore tests” Steve sighed heavily and closed his eyes.
“No, s’just gunna tell me my uterus is shrivelling away, don’t wanna go in and hear how faulty I am” Bucky’s anguish began to seep into his scent and Steve held him tightly.
“Not faulty, my good Omega has never been faulty” Bucky sniffed and curled into his arms even more.
“Thank you Alpha” Steve rumbled rested his chin on top of Bucky’s head. It had to be bad for the Omega to be nesting so soon after his Heat.
“Let’s sleep baby doll, then when we wake up we’ll make some soup okay? I got the stuff for your ma’s old recipe, how’s that sound?” Bucky nodded and smiled softly.
“Sounds good Stevie” Steve curled around him protectively. Projecting a low rumble as the Omega drifted off to sleep in his arms.
Steve didn’t know how to fix Bucky’s trauma – but tummy aches?
He could handle tummy aches.
Steve smiled as Bucky stirred the soup in the pot, he turned back to where he was chopping the vegetables to throw in as Bucky turned to looked at him.
The Omega was dressed in Steve’s sweats, t-shirt and hoodie, his long hair tied back in a messy bun and occasionally bumping off the Alpha with a small smile.
“Steve…?” the Captain hummed and turned back to where he was chopping.
“I was wondering of maybe – if we could look at – I mean-“ Steve quirked a brow and watched as Bucky fumbled over his words.
“What is it Buck?” The brunette let out a long breath and looked up at him hesitantly.
“I know I’ve got a long way to go, but I was wondering if we could get the information on a-adoption?” Steve looked at him with big eyes as Bucky began rambling.
“Before, when you were sick. A litter – it was never an option. Even if we could adopt, there was no way we could have them, we just couldn’t afford it. But, a-after the serum. When we were together it – it actually became possible you know? A-and I let myself want it. Want pups – want a family. Then – then with Hydra I – I lost it again. And now, with this egg, this horrible, wonderful egg that didn’t work I realized how much I wanted it again. I know I have a ways to go before I’m in a-any condition f-for adoption consideration. B-but maybe if we get the information, we could-“ Steve set down the knife and moved over to tenderly frame his face. Bucky looked up at him with wide eyes and Steve gave him a wet smile.
“Do you have any idea how much I want to have a family with you Barnes? I’d walk away from all of it, if it meant I got to have a family with you” Bucky gave his own shaky smile as his eyes filled with tears and he encircled Steve’s wrists with his hands and stepped into his space.
“R-really?” Steve nodded and the two rested their foreheads together.
“M’tired of fightin’ Buck, only reason I’ve been running as long as I have is because I was scared that if I left it, it meant I lost you. But now, now I have you back. I lost you once being Captain America. I won’t do it again. We’ll go when the centers open on Monday, get as much information as we can. Then we’ll get planning, and once we’re ready. I’ll hang up the shield” Bucky gaped at him and sniffed.
“Steve” Bucky exhaled and fell into the Alpha’s arms, capturing his lips in a passionate kiss as Steve cradled him.
“You’re it for me Barnes, I wanna have a family with you” Bucky nodded as tears slid down his face, eyes closed as he gripped Steve’s shirt tightly.
“I want that too” Steve closed his eyes as tears slid down his face, burying his face into Bucky’s neck, pressing a kiss to the Bonding Mark as Bucky ran a hand up and down his back.
It was about three in the morning when the smell finally hit Steve’s nose. They were back in the nest at Bucky’s request. Steve had convinced him to go see Bruce the next day, under the condition that Steve get adoption information from Tony while he was being seen.
He sat up and looked around the Suite with sharp eyes, Bucky was still fast asleep next to him, purring contentedly. He began to crawl out of the nest when he noticed the scent becoming fainter. He came back and crawled towards Bucky as the smell hit his lungs.
But it wasn’t the sharp, piercing scent of Bucky’s Heat and Steve immediately snarled. Bucky immediately waking up and looking at Steve nervously.
“Steve-“ but the Alpha’s eyes were black as he ripped Bucky’s shirt off, pressing his nose against Bucky’s neck and following the scent down his body towards the Omega’s stomach.
“Hush!” Bucky whined as Steve pressed his nose just under Bucky’s belly-button, inhaling deeply.
He’d never smelt anything like it.
There was no mistaking that smell.
Steve suddenly let out a sob and Bucky looked down at him as the scent finally, finally hit the Omega’s nostrils. Bucky propped himself up on his elbows and looked down at his Mate with tear filled eyes.
“But – that’s not-“ Steve rested his large hand on Bucky’s stomach and let out a small rumble that he’d never made before.
But he’d heard Mr. Barnes use it when Mrs. Barnes was pregnant with Becca in 1925.
Realization dawned on Bucky’s face at the sound and he brought a hand down to his stomach as well.
“Did Bruce do an ultrasound?” Bucky shook his head and the two looked at each other and Bucky let out an excited sob.
“Pregnant” Steve reached down quickly and peppered kisses all over his stomach as Bucky gaped down at him. Bucky reverently stroked his stomach as Steve continuously nuzzled it.
“Little one, you have no idea how long we’ve waited for you”
“I can’t believe I missed this!” Bruce was talking, but after a nudge from Natasha he became aware that no one was listening to him.
The supersoldiers had their eyes glued to the screen, staring at the image of the tiny life making itself at home. It couldn’t be no bigger than a baby shrimp really, and Tony’s tech had done a lot of enhancing so the normally grainy image was crystal clear.
Steve grabbed Bucky’s hand in a vice-like grip as the screen became blurry through his tears. Bucky coughed and murmured softly, voice rough with emotion.
“A-are they okay?” Tony looked over at the scans and turned back to the group smiling.
“Everything’s reading just fine, personally I think you should take it easy for the pregnancy but overall. That’s one healthy jellybean there.” A sob escaped Steve and he looked at him gently.
“C-can we get a print of that Tony?” the genius held up an envelope and smiled.
“Already done Spangles, let me just go do a couple double checks – for protocol. But you should be able to go home soon” the two nodded and Bruce gently wiped the gel off of Bucky’s stomach and silently stepped out. Bucky turned to the Alpha with bright eyes.
“Is this really happening?” Steve pressed kisses to their joined hands.
“I wanna tell you yes but I can’t believe it myself” the two shared a wet laugh and Bucky grabbed the back of his head, pressing their foreheads together.
“I didn’t think we could ever have this”
“Me either.” Steve deflated against the Omega and Bucky wrapped his arms around him, hugging him to his chest as Steve began to cry uncontrollably.
“Sorry, sorry I just – you’re here, you’re here and I’m here and we’re having a baby” Bucky watched with soft eyes as he looked at Steve knowingly.
“You’re not alone anymore sweetheart. I’m not leaving you again” Steve looked up at him and cupped the back of his neck, pulling him in for a passionate kiss.
“Never again, neither of us.”
“Tony said bed rest”
“No, Tony said take it easy” Steve growled and Bucky let out a hopeless whine as Steve scooped him off the couch and carried him towards the bedroom.
“Wait!” Steve stopped and set down his Mate as they both looked at the locked door.
“Open it” Steve didn’t need to be told twice, running back to the kitchen where the keys were. Steve rushed back and slowly unlocked the door, the two looking into the blank room as their excited scents mingled.
“Yellow, it needs to be yellow” Steve watched Bucky’s eyes light up as he walked into the room, wheels turning in his mind as he began to analyze the nursery.
Steve watched from the doorway, smiling so brightly his face hurt as Bucky turned to look at him.
“Whattya think Stevie?” he shook his head and walked into the room, wrapping his arms around his waist.
“It’s perfect Buck” Bucky laughed and wrapped his arms around his neck.
“You didn’t even hear what I said you punk”
“Don’t need to” Bucky snickered as Steve scented him lightly. Steve nuzzled their noses together as Bucky let out a playful whine.
“Steve I need your input here, we’re running out of time” Steve smiled warmly and moved down to rest his hand on Bucky’s now slightly swollen abdomen.
His hard edges had softened over the past three months and his eyes were glowing. He still had nightmares and had days where he wouldn’t talk to anyone –
Anyone except the baby anyway.
Steve had lost count of how many times he’d walked in on Bucky cooing, singing or speaking softly to his slowly protruding stomach. Pregnancy was a good look on Bucky.
No. It looked breathtaking on Bucky.
Steve smiled and kissed him deeply before resting his forehead against his, looking down at where their hands were now both resting on Bucky’s stomach through the sweatshirt he was wearing (Steve’s own, he noted proudly).
“What do you think they are?” Steve breathed a laugh and rubbed it tenderly as Bucky purred.
“Does it matter?” Bucky breathed a laugh and shook his head.
“No, it really doesn’t” the two shared a quiet moment before Steve finally pulled himself out of the moment.
“Hey Sam, in the kitchen” Sam smiled as he walked into the kitchen where Steve was putting together a dish of fruits, cheese and meats that Natasha and Clint had sent over.
“How you doin’ man?” Steve breathed a laugh and cocked his head at his friend as happiness poured from him.
“Tired, but happy, I’m really happy Sam” Sam smiled warmly at the Alpha and clapped his shoulder.
“M’so happy for you Steve. Really, you both deserve it” Steve’s eyes filled with tears and he nodded.
“Y’know, I never thought about it until this morning when I called you. If you hadn’t made me go check out my Mark. I never would have found him” suddenly Sam found himself wrapped up in a huge hug. He smiled and rubbed his back gently.
“S’all good man, you’d do the same for me” Steve nodded and stepped back.
“Gunna be a while before I see you in the field then huh? Good, you need a break man” Steve cleared his throat and looked away for a moment.
“That’s uh, it’s why I invited you over Sam,” Sam’s eyes filled with confusion and Steve led the way into the living room, turning around and presenting Sam with the Shield.
“I’ve done this for a long time Sam, longer than I ever dreamed I would. It was an honour but I’m not him anymore. I have another mission now, and I am so excited for it,” Steve let out a tearful laugh and Sam smiled at him encouragingly.
“I’m excited and scared and so ready and so not ready but – Bucky, the baby, I need them to come first. And I can’t be here if I’m called off everywhere” Sam stared down at the Shield as his eyes filled with tears.
“Steve, I don’t think I –“ Steve extended the Shield and shook it gently in Sam’s direction.
“When I picked this up, when I got this Shield, I picked it up with one goal – to keep the one I loved most safe and with me, and I’ve done that Sam. I don’t need this anymore” Sam finally took the Shield and tested it out as he looked at him.
“Dr. Erskine said that this belonged not to a soldier, but a good man. Sam I can’t think of anyone who should have this more than you. It’s yours.” Sam wiped his eyes and nodded
“Thank you, Steve” Steve gave a mock salute and grinned.
“Go get ‘em Cap”
“Shh, shh, it’s okay, s’just me” Bucky looked up at him blearily as Steve curled around him, propping himself on his arm to look down at his Mate as he set the food dish on the raised flooring of the nursery. Bucky noticed it with a purr and turned his attention back to the little bundle wiggling against his chest. Steve felt his heart swell and he tucked some of Bucky’s sweaty hair back.
“How are you feeling Omega?” Bucky smiled at the presence against his chest and his eyes drifted closed.
“M’happy Alpha, so happy” Steve kissed his Bond Mark before propping himself up again to gently stroke the baby’s cheek, smiling at the little hand which enclosed around his finger.
“Bruce says she’s probably enhanced, s’why the delivery was so hard” Steve nodded and looked back down at the babe with melting eyes.
“Not even in the world for a day and you’re already causing trouble huh?” Bucky breathed a laugh as the baby rolled back into his chest with a gurgle.
“You need to eat Buck” Bucky nodded but made no move to reach the food. Steve crawled over and scooped the infant into his arms, using his free hand to feed Bucky bits of fruit.
“How did Sam take it?”
“I think he’ll need a few days, but he’ll be good” Bucky nodded, eyes never leaving the little girl.
“Of course he will. But you just slapped a Hell of a sign on the poor guy!” Steve chuckled and looked down at the little one lovingly.
“Think you’re gunna miss it?” Steve never looked away from the little one as he ran his hand through Bucky’s hair.
“Not at all. This, this is what I want” Bucky purred and rested his head on Steve’s lap as he reached up to adjust the little blanket.
“I love you Steve” he leaned down to kiss his head.
“I love you too, my good Omega-“ the baby garbled and the two laughed as Steve turned back down.
“I love you too Sarah Winnifred Rogers, and I cannot wait to see what you have in store for us” Bucky hummed and drifted off to sleep in his arms as Steve looked down at his little family in the nursery nest.
A hundred years and three lifetimes later, Steve finally had the life he’d always dreamed of.
And he couldn’t wait to see where it took him.
And just like that, she is done!
I hope you guys liked it! I loved writing this story and I love all the comments and love and support I get from you all!
As you know I'm taking prompts but I just wanted to let you know that I am going backpacking for the next month and I leave tomorrow so I likely won't be posting for a while.
I can't wait to see what wonderful prompts, comments and works that you amazing people come up with while I'm gone!!
I love you all v much!