It’s late, inching towards “early” when Aiba declares the second round of the Arashi no Arashi-kai over, wobbling to his feet to call a taxi. They’re all sprawled in varying states of cheerful intoxication across Jun’s living room furniture; Sho is wedged in between Ohno and Nino on the larger couch, with Nino tucked cozily under his armpit, sleepily whistling the chorus of Bazuri Night while Ohno leans heavily against his other side, scrolling through something on his phone.
It had been nice of Jun to invite them all over. Even so, it had felt odd to have the five of them together like this; Sho kept unconsciously checking around for cameras, for cue cards. Odd, but nice. He feels so relaxed and warm, stuffed between Ohno and Nino, with nothing around them but the clinking sounds of Jun gathering up glasses and Aiba talking on the phone.
“Sho-chan, too,” Sho hears Aiba say. He opens his eyes – when did he close them?
“What about me?” Sho croaks, clearing his throat. It’s dry; he needs to remember to use his humidifier when he sleeps, he thinks to himself. He pushes himself to his feet, stumbling a little on his way up.
“Are you coming with?” Aiba says, and Sho blinks, realizing that Aiba already has his jacket on. “The taxi will be downstairs in five!” he announces to the room at large.
There are mixed grunts of acknowledgement from the couch behind Sho as Ohno and Nino slink into the warm space recently vacated by him.
Jun wanders in from his kitchen area, wiping a glass with a dish towel. “Sho lives in the opposite direction of you three. He can get his own cab back.”
“I’ll call one,” Sho says, surveying the general debris of Jun’s coffee table, trying to locate his phone.
Aiba’s phone buzzes, and he checks the screen. “It’s almost here – let’s go, come on – ”
“Make me,” Nino says absently, and Jun rolls his eyes as Aiba’s eyes brighten. He scoots over to the couch to try to lift Nino up, nearly kneeing Ohno in the stomach in the process.
“Nino, you’ve gotten heavier,” Aiba remarks, as he digs his hands into Nino’s armpits to try to heave him upwards.
“Too many potato chips,” Ohno snickers, as Nino digs his heels into the couch cushions, nearly dragging Aiba down onto the couch with him. It’s a shame that this wouldn’t make it on the DVD, Sho thinks fondly. Although he really didn’t know what kind of fans would want a giggle– drunk pile of middle-aged men piled on top of each other on a couch.
It’s another few minutes before the same trio has made their way to Jun’s entranceway, located their shoes, been handed packages of frozen grass-fed beef, and cheerfully waved off on their way.
And then it’s just them. Sho hasn’t called a taxi yet, but he’s starting to wonder if he’s hoping for too much. It’s late and they’re both tired.
Jun sighs, locking the door again. “Another drink?” he asks, and Sho nods, his pulse speeding up a little.
They both settle back on Jun’s couch, a bottle of wine on the table in front of them. Jun has his drapes open and the living room lights dimmed, so they can see the plump white moon through the veranda window.
They sit together like that in a comfortable silence. Sho is enjoying himself, but his mind is buzzing too furiously to truly allow him to relax. It has been ages since they have had a chance to do anything – to be alone together like this. Surely Jun isn't intending to pack him off him in a taxi after a glass of wine?
Sho decides to be bold, letting his hand stray casually over to Jun's thigh, hoping that he's not misreading things.
He can feel the warmth of Jun's skin through the rough material of his jeans, and he's already working himself up with just this touch, thinking about how long it's been since he's had the chance to touch Jun properly, to skim his fingers over the pale, sensitive skin of his inner thighs, to taste him and nip at the soft skin with his teeth.
Jun snorts into his glass, but it's an affectionate sound, and he shifts his leg so that Sho's hand slips further in, closer to where Sho wants it to be. "Awfully forward tonight, aren't we?"
Sho is pretty sure that his ears are bright red, and he can't bring himself to face Jun directly, but he keeps his hand where it is, fingers stroking slowly across the in-seam of Jun's jeans. "I can't always depend on you to get things rolling."
Two years ago, he thinks suddenly, it was almost two years ago. This couch, almost seated in the same places. Drinking together, warm and tipsy and comfortable, with a strange, shared heat that nearly went unspoken until Jun moved first to break that short distance.
Sho has lost count of how many times they've done this since – and not only here, not only like this. Sometimes it's hurried and feverish, when it's been a while; sometimes it's slow and affectionate. A lot goes unspoken, but never unsaid – they know how to read each other, probably better than anyone else besides Ohno or Nino or Aiba.
Sho's hand must have stilled at some point, because Jun shifts his arm from where he had been resting it on the top of the couch to put it on top of Sho's. Their fingers lace together almost automatically and Sho thinks, possibly for the thousandth time, how lucky he is to have this. He tilts his head sideways, leaning his cheek back against the plush fabric of the couch cushion, only to find Jun already watching him, brown eyes warm behind his glasses.
Jun laughs again, and it's near a giggle this time, happy and relaxed and bright, the colour rising in his cheeks. "Is that all you meant by 'getting things rolling'?" he asks, teasing and affectionate.
Sho is never good at snappy comebacks, especially when he's distracted by having Jun within easy reach. Jun is rubbing his thumb over the knuckle of Sho's pinky finger slowly, keeping their fingers twined together, and it's almost embarrassing how much that simple movement is turning him on. "I'm open to suggestions," he says finally.
That makes Jun laugh again, shifting away and breaking contact to set the glass he had been holding in his free hand down on the low table in front of the couch. Sho is momentarily disappointed at the sudden loss of warmth, but then Jun moves again – reaching out, hands meeting Sho's, lifting to pin them on either side of Sho's head against the couch cushion, leaning forward until he's half-straddling Sho's lap, one thigh between both of Sho’s, their foreheads touching.
Jun's breath is hot against his cheek, sharp and spicy with the scent of the wine he had been drinking. "You lead from here," Jun says, pointedly not moving. He's not restraining Sho at all in particular – their fingers are still intertwined, and there's no strength in his hold, but Sho doesn't really want to move, enjoying the feeling of being pinned down. He wants to touch Jun more, though, so he's going to have to compromise.
"Closer," Sho says.
Jun hums near his ear, nosing at his cheek. "Could you be more specific?" A playful Jun is fun, Sho knows, but sometimes annoying. It's embarrassing for Sho to verbalize what he wants, even though he trusts Jun not to tease or reject him over it. They both lack confidence about this in different ways; the first few times they did this, it took Sho ages to clue in to the face that Jun was confident when he touched Sho, quick to kneel and take Sho's cock in his mouth – but he batted away Sho's wandering hands, preferring to focus on pleasuring Sho. It took a long time – and persistent effort on Sho's part – to make him feel comfortable with being touched, with being the center of attention.
It seems now like Jun is in the midst of his own efforts to get Sho to push past his discomfort. That's another thing about their relationship that Sho appreciates, when he's feeling especially mushy. He's never had anything like this before – deep respect, mutual understanding, a sense of fun, pushing each other to be their best. It's probably a good thing that he didn't acknowledge Jun's crush on him when they were younger, or that Jun ignored his clumsy advances in hotel corridors in their twenties. It took them this long to get here, but because of that, there's a deep-seated emotional connection that makes it clear that this isn't just getting each other off or convenient sex. It's maybe not love, but it's important to Sho, and he hopes – no, he’s sure – that it's important to Jun.
"On my lap," Sho says finally. It comes out quieter than he intended, but Jun is close enough to hear anyway, and his smile as he lets go of Sho's hands and moves to fulfill Sho's request is as good a reward as the feeling of Jun's thighs bracketing his, his weight settling down on Sho's thighs.
Sho takes advantage of having his hands free again to stroke them down the curve of Jun's back, past the dip of his spine, letting his hands settle on Jun's ass and tucking them into the back pockets of his jeans.
Cooperating, he thinks, pleased with himself, was the right thing to do. Jun is already working at his own belt, shifting closer as he unzips his jeans so that he's closer to Sho's own growing hardness. Sho watches him, fascinated, as Jun pushes his pants and underwear down just far enough to let his cock out. It’s already flushed and standing, curving up against a fine trail of dark hair. Jun strokes himself, rubbing his thumb over the slit, fingers coming away slick.
Sho can't tear his eyes away, but Jun's low chuckle tells him that he knows exactly what he’s doing to Sho and is completely satisfied with himself.
"How do you want this?" Jun asks, reminding Sho that he has a job to do. Sho bites his lip, trying to think. Jun's ass is firm and hot under his hands, even through the thick material of his jeans, and Sho feels his cock twitch at the thought of Jun riding him, just like this – sinking down and taking Sho's cock, letting Sho grip his ass as they moved together. The bob of Jun's cock as Jun strokes himself in front of him is tempting, too. Sho loves sucking Jun's cock, loves the feel of its thickness stretching his mouth wide open, loves the salty, rich taste and the way it breaks Jun down until he's practically begging.
This is completely unfair, Sho decides. It's like taking him to a fresh seafood barbecue and telling him that he can only have one type of shellfish.
“I want everything,” he admits, taking one of his hands out of Jun’s pocket and joining Jun’s own hand on his cock – moving slowly, more just to feel the warm, thick weight in his hand than anything. “It’s too hard to choose.”
Jun’s breath hitches slightly with both of their hands working his cock, but he still laughs. “So greedy. In the end, you’re going to make me figure everything out, aren’t you?”
“Or we could just do everything,” Sho suggests, not entirely kidding. It’s been at least four months since they’ve had time to do this, and there’s no telling how long it will be until this can happen again.
Jun makes a face at him, exasperated. “What part of 'everything' do you want to start with?" He takes his hand off his dick, swatting away Sho's as well. "You'd better stop that, or I'm not going to last."
"Let's move," Sho says. As much as he loves Jun's couch, he wants room to stretch out, to do things properly. "But – " he's struck with sudden inspiration as Jun starts to move off his lap.
"Can you – you should take off your clothes here," he says, feeling like he’s tripping over his words. "Not moving, just – here."
Jun's eyes gleam in the dim light of the living room. "That's better," he says approvingly, immediately moving to peel off his shirt and toss it on the couch beside them.
Sho takes his time letting his fingers map out the firm planes of Jun's abs, the sharp juts of his rib, rubbing the dusky points of his nipples until they're hard and standing. Jun waits patiently, allowing this, burying his head in the junction of Sho's neck and shoulder, kissing at the side of his neck.
It seems like ages before Jun leans back, still resting his weight on Sho's lap, hooking his thumbs into his jeans and underwear and sliding them slowly down over his hips, his thighs. Sho braces a hand against Jun's side, helping him shift his balance as he slides them down off one leg, and then the other. With Jun fully naked, he can't resist sliding his hand up Jun's thigh, exactly as he had fantasized about just a bit earlier.
"You look so good," Sho says, almost without thinking, and Jun ducks his head in embarrassment. It's cute, but he's so glad that Jun is becoming more confident with him, allowing Sho to let him know how much he wants him – not as an outlet, not just as a fuck, but because he is Jun. He vaguely remembers his plans of moving, but with a lapful of Jun, he can't resist pulling him up on his knees and closer, so that Jun is hovering above him, his cock bobbing in front of Sho's face.
It's a bit of an awkward angle for his neck, but Jun's moan when Sho wraps his lips around the head of his cock is worth it. Jun's cock is thick and hot in his mouth, and Sho keeps it shallow, using his hand to hold to hold Jun steady while sucking at the head, briefly slipping his tongue under the foreskin to hear Jun’s voice break before drawing back and letting the slit drag against the rough bed of his tongue, the salty-bitter tang of Jun filling his mouth. Jun's appreciative moans break off into a gasp, when Sho slips his mouth off his cock, ducking his head lower to mouth at Jun's balls, tongue gently curling around them. His fingers grip Sho’s hair, just on the edge of being painful.
“You mentioned moving,” Jun says, his voice not as composed as he probably intends it to be, and Sho smiles to himself, nuzzling the soft skin at the crease of Jun’s inner thigh, dropping a kiss there before drawing back.
“Is it okay?” Sho asks. He might be in charge of directing things tonight, but it’s still Jun’s place.
Jun snorts, keeping his grip on Sho’s hair as he moves in to drop a kiss on Sho’s lips. “No, by all means, I love cleaning suspicious stains out of my couch.” Sho doesn’t let Jun get away with a quick peck on the lips; he gets a hand around the back of Jun’s head and drags him back down for another kiss, parting Jun’s lips with his tongue to taste him.
They kiss, and kiss, and kiss some more. Sho is half-gone with the slick, wet noises that they make, their mouths moving together. It’s at least five minutes before he manages to pull himself away. He’s so hard now that his jeans are getting uncomfortable, his erection pressing almost painfully against the zipper of his fly – and Jun hasn’t even touched him yet. “Let’s go,” he says, catching his breath.
They don’t get quite all of the way down the hallway before Jun pins Sho against a wall, hands sneaking up under his t-shirt as he goes in for another kiss, sucking on Sho’s tongue. Sho tries his best to keep up, grabbing a handful of Jun’s ass to pull him up against him, hurrying to unzip himself with his free hand and get his cock out. They both groan into the kiss when their cocks brush together. Sho adjusts his grip to line them up properly, so that they slide against each other as their hips rock together.
Jun kisses the side of Sho’s neck, nipping at a pulse point. “Is this everything yet?” He has Sho’s shirt rucked up so he can play with his nipples, stroking and pinching them until they are pebbled and hard.
Sho is losing his mind between the friction of their cocks sliding together and Jun’s kisses, but he wants more, and it’s that determination that gets his back off the wall, steering Jun towards the bathroom to shower first, still stealing kisses before Jun snickers and closes the door behind him.
It’s only during his own shower that Sho’s mind begins to wake up completely, matching his clearly very alert body. For a brief moment, anxiety rises up in him - a familiar feeling from the first few times this happened; it took him to realize that it scared him because it was so important to him to get this right - he wasn’t just fucking around.
Sho tilts his face up under the spray, pushing wet hair behind his ears, and lets his mind drift. It had been a great evening - lots of food, his favourite people. And it was ending in the most perfect way possible. He’s happy. He’s still not completely comfortable with taking the lead, but he trusts Jun.
Jun is stretched out on the bed when Sho comes into his room. Jun has stripped off the sheets, his long legs and torso twisting against the cool, clean fabric, his glasses off and folded neatly on the side table. Sho takes a moment to appreciate the creamy tint of Jun’s skin against the white sheets and mentally makes a note to buy him some darker bedsheets for his birthday next year. He deposits the towel tied around his waist on a chair in the corner of the room and returns to sit on the edge of the bed, conscious of Jun’s eyes on him.
“Good plan so far,” Jun says as Sho scoots closer to him on the bed until that they’re both lying down, facing each other. “What’s next?”
Sho swallows down his reflex to say whatever you want. It’s a little strange without Jun taking charge – the pace has been slower, with Jun being considerate of Sho taking his time to decide. It’s not bad, though, not uncomfortable.
It’s nearing 3:00AM, now that he can see the clock on Jun’s bedside table, and both of them have filming in the morning. As much as he wants to spend all night doing things to each other, neither of them is probably going to last long enough. Even so, Sho wants to make good use of the time that they have.
“Will you fuck me?” The surprise on Jun’s face is momentary, replaced by a heat in his gaze that makes Sho shiver in anticipation. They haven’t done it this way before, and Sho doesn’t know if Jun assumed that Sho didn’t want it or if he was just afraid to ask. It’s not something that Sho has experienced a lot, but he’s enjoyed it in the past, and he’s positive that it will be good with Jun.
Jun moves closer to kiss him, hand slipping around to the nape of Sho’s neck as he opens his mouth for him. Sho meets each kiss with all of his heart. This is another way they communicate, he has learned. Jun’s kisses are meant to reassure, to show his eagerness, to seek permission. Sho tries his best to answer back with yes to all of it. Yes, this. Yes, me too.
Things go slowly, but it’s not long before Jun maneuvers him onto his side, settling in behind him and uncapping some lube from the bedside table. Sho hides a smile into one of Jun’s pillows; apparently his turn to take charge is over, and he is okay with that. He breathes and focuses on the sensation of Jun’s finger working into him, the hot press of Jun’s cock against the small of his back. He strokes his own cock in time with the movement of Jun’s fingers inside of him, but it’s still not enough.
“You okay?” Jun asks, adding another finger, scissoring and stretching him. Sho nods, pushing back against Jun’s fingers to urge him on. It’s been awhile, and Sho knows he’s probably almost too tight, but Jun is going slow, making sure it doesn’t hurt. He moans deep in his throat when he feels one of Jun’s fingers graze his prostate, tugging on his cock – Jun had better hurry up, or he wasn’t going to last long.
“I think it’s fine now,” Sho manages; he's not going to last long at any rate, but it would be embarrassing to come even before Jun was in him. Jun had to be on the edge too, as patient at he had been.
There’s a kiss on his shoulder as Jun withdraws his fingers, and Sho tips his head back against Jun’s shoulder briefly before rolling up onto his hands and knees, folding his arms and burying his face in a pillow, hips up in the air. He can hear Jun fumbling around near the side of the bed, rustling sounds as he digs in the bedside cabinet.
He’s hot all over, his skin burning and oversensitive, and he buries his head into the cool fabric of the pillow as he feels Jun’s hands coming back to smooth over his hips, back to his ass, thumbs spreading him open as Jun lines himself up. Sho can imagine the serious look of concentration on his face, and the thought nearly makes him laugh, but it trails off into a low moan as he feels the tip of Jun’s cock nudge against his entrance.
“Here goes,” Jun breathes, one hand gripping Sho’s hip tightly as he guides himself in, maddeningly slow. Sho arches his back, mouth dropping open against the pillow as Jun’s cock sinks deeper into him. It was unfamiliar, but not painful. It doesn’t take long until Jun is almost all of the way in.
“Move,” Sho says, when it seems like Jun is still for too long. “You’re not going to break me.” He rolls his hips back, as if trying to take Jun even deeper, and Jun groans, pulling back and stroking back in, a slow and steady rhythm that sends shivers up Sho’s spine.
Sho grips at the sheets, closing his eyes and trying to hold on, but Jun is growing bolder, each thrust faster, and when Jun reaches around him to wrap a hand around Sho’s cock, he’s lost. It’s not another minute before he’s coming, groaning with the release. It’s only a few more strokes before Jun’s pace turns feverish, rocking into Sho with a low moan as he comes.
The room is quiet and still around them as they catch their breath, shifting and separating, trying to clean up as best they can before complete exhaustion sets in – it’s not long at all before the washcloths are hung up to dry in the bathroom, a new fitted sheet and the rest of the previously abandoned bedclothes have been arranged in place, and they’re slipping together below the sheets.
Sho’s eyes feel heavy, but he welcomes Jun’s kiss – softer now, unhurried kisses. It’s been too long – Sho’s drama filming the previous autumn had given way to Jun’s own, and then the Olympics had taken Sho away for a while.
Sho nuzzles his nose against Jun’s cheek, breathing him in. It will never be often enough, but maybe it’s partly his fault. It’s always been Jun taking the initiative, making the first move, and it didn’t occur to Sho that perhaps there were times he was hesitant to reach out. Sho will have to try to meet him halfway, even it’s embarrassing.
“Nakata-san think we can have the augmented reality thing ready for next year’s concerts, or maybe the year after,” Jun says out of the blue, breaking the kiss. “Which sucks, because it was perfect for this year’s concept.”
Sho kisses the mark above his upper lip. “You really need to take it easy on the tech department,” he jokes. “Remember how long the penlights took?”
“Mmm, but this is trickier because we can’t exactly sell smartphones, so there’s all sorts of issues with taking photos that I have to get approved – ”
“You’ll make it happen,” Sho says simply. Jun isn’t looking for advice – he knows so much more than Sho anyways. He’s just a worrywart sometimes, especially with projects like this that cost a lot of money for development but carry the risk of potentially being shelved if they don’t come out right. “It will be fine.”
Jun laughs, curling up against Sho and tucking his head under Sho’s chin. “Look how boring we are. Some pillow talk this is.”
Sho runs his fingers through Jun’s hair, closing his eyes. He’s so comfortable, and he can feel sleep creeping up on him already.
He’s always secretly liked that he’s the one that Jun comes to talk about concert details. It's another kind of trust that Jun opens up to him; at times like now, it's a reminder that they share more than this, an affirmation that what they do together won't ever change their commitments as professionals. Despite Sho’s initial reservations, they’ve only become stronger, closer.
“Go to sleep,” he says, trying to sound commanding, but cutting out halfway into a yawn. Jun doesn’t answer; his eyes are already closed, the lines around his eyes softening. Sho’s own eyes feel like they have lead weights attached to them, but he can’t help but steal a few second to watch Jun.
Sho’s always known what he wanted. But it’s only thanks to Jun that he’s become able to express it.
“Thank you,” he softly, unsure whether or not Jun is already sleeping. It doesn’t really matter; Sho will find a way to let him know - with or without words.