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I hit your boyfriend (I don't regret it)

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The street lights shine above her. Cars passing by next to her. They’re just blurs. It’s all a blur really. Her heart. Her mind. Their situation. Their relationship. Minjoo tightens her grip on her bag. She doesn’t know when it happened. One day she just noticed that her relationship with the older girl had become complicated. And by the time she noticed, the lines have already been blurred past recognition.

She walks home with heave steps and a heavy heart. They had a fight.

It was stupid. It was really stupid. Why did she have to say that to Chaewon? She hates how it turned out. How her eyes turned green the moment that stupid boy took the older’s hand. How she had pushed and practically killed the boy in front of the older girl. She hates how Chaewon defended her boyfriend.

Minjoo scoffs as she passes by a bridge. Boyfriend. What a joke. She glares at the road in front of her. Why did Chaewon even got a boyfriend in the first place? It’s not like she even liked him! The boy just confessed to her one day out of the blue and she just accepts? They had never even talked. Not a word to each other and suddenly they’re dating? Chaewon hadn’t even mentioned anything about boys to her prior!

She kicks a pebble out of her way. Stupid pebble. Stupid Chaewon. Stupid school. Stupid boy. Stupid feelings.

And the worst part? She doesn’t even know why she’s jealous. It’s not like she wants the boy. Ew. Does that mean she wants Chaewon? Maybe. She doesn’t know! Is that why the line is so blurred?

Houses fill her field of view. Minjoo’s back at her neighborhood. She used to be so sad that the older girl lived across town from her. But right now, she’s glad. She doesn’t think she could face her right now.

But then she spots a red car right in front of her house. It’s hers. She’s here. Minjoo can’t help but freeze in the spot. She can’t take another step. What is she going to say to the older girl? I’m sorry I punched your boyfriend, and hey, turns out I’ve been subconsciously wanting you so that’s fun. She can’t say that. She can’t say anything if we’re going by her mind.

Minjoo turns around and walks to the other direction. Maybe if she’s out longer the older girl would give up and leave her house. But things never go your way. Alas, that is real life. She tried anyway.

The red car’s engine turns on. She’s seen her. The car drives and parks right next to her. Chaewon quickly comes out of the car. Minjoo has half the mind to run away.

“Where were you going?” Chaewon asks her.

Minjoo doesn’t answer her. Opting to turn her back to her. A frown on her face. Chaewon rolls her eyes and steps closer. She grabs Minjoo’s wrist but the younger girl doesn’t budge.

“Okay, fine, don’t look at me,” Chaewon scoffs. “will you at least explain to me why you punched him?”

The younger girl opens her mouth to answer but decided against it.

“Come on, tell me,” she urges her.

“You won’t like the answer,” Minjoo finally says.

“I won’t like the answer either way. So, spit it out.”

“No.”

“Minjoo!” Chaewon tugs at her arm.

“No!”

“And why not?” she tugs harder on her arm.

Minjoo finally looks at her. But what Chaewon didn’t expect was the tears in her eyes.

“Because I don’t exactly want to ruin our ten years of friendship, Chaewon! That’s why!”

Her eyes widen at the sight. She quickly cups Minjoo’s face and wipes the tears with her thumbs. The older girl doesn’t really know what to say.

“I—I don’t want to lose you.” Minjoo cries out. Her hands grips Chaewon’s and remove them from her face. She steps back from her.

“You’re not going to lose me, Minjoo.” Chaewon takes a step closer to her.

“Yes, I am!” Minjoo wipes her tears with the back of her hand. Another step back. Her back bumping into the red car.

“How do you know that if you haven’t told me yet?” Chaewon takes another step forward.

“Because I know you, Chaewon! And I know for sure that you don’t like me back!” the younger girl refuses to look at her. “You got a boyfriend for fuck's sake! I don’t know when it started, but before I noticed it, I like you more than a friend. Actually, scratch that I’m in love with you! And you just had to get a fucking boyfriend!”

Chaewon falters in her steps. But she takes another step regardless.

“Do you know how hard it was? Looking at you and that guy? All the while, I was confused on what I’m even feeling? And how hard it was after finding out? I punched him cause I was sick of it. Seeing you and your boyfriend—”

“Ex-boyfriend,” Chaewon corrects her.

“What?” Minjoo whips her head to look at her. When did she get so close?

“I broke up with him,” the older girl explains. She wipes the tears with her thumb. Gently caressing Minjoo’s face.

“W-When?”

“Today.”

“Why? Why would you do that?” Minjoo looks at her questioningly.

“He started insulting you. Can’t date a guy who insults the person I love.” Chaewon puts her free arm on the car. Trapping Minjoo between it and her.

“What are you—”

“I never loved him, Minjoo,” Chaewon explains. “I love you.”

There’s fire in Minjoo’s chest, and she isn’t sure if she wants to put it out. Happy would be an understatement to say the least. But those aren’t the only feelings she feels in her heart. Confusion is one of them too.

“B-But then why did you date him?”

“I thought you didn’t liked me.” Chaewon’s face is getting closer and closer.

“That’s stupi—”

“I loved you for years, Minjoo.” Their lips only a breaths hair away. “Now, shut up and let me kiss you.”

Minjoo closes her eyes and soft lips collide with her own. Kissing Chaewon feels like fire. It’s hot. Very hot. She thinks she’s going to burn herself. But Chaewon burns so good. She can’t have enough of it. She circles her arms around Chaewon’s waist. Tugging her even closer. She feels hands on her nape. Fingers scratching her scalp. A shiver goes down her spine.

“Am I your girlfriend now?” Minjoo asks once they separate. Chaewon chuckles.

“Yes, you are. Now, kiss me again,” she demands.

They kiss again. Is it better than their first kiss? Minjoo’s not so sure, because this also feels like the first one. Another kiss, and it still feels the same. Minjoo thinks that probably all kisses with Chaewon would feel this way. But then Chaewon bites her lip and suddenly they’re making out. And ohmygod she didn’t think kissing with her could get any better.

Kim Chaewon lit a fire in her heart. She doesn’t think it’ll ever go away. She doesn’t think Chaewon will let it anyway. Minjoo likes it that way.