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That Man

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Bernadette hated being pregnant.

It wasn’t just the fact that it was her second child in as many years – it was how being pregnant was making her. Not that she didn’t adore getting away with each and every mood swings because she was hormonal, the ability and the nerve to always just tell people what she thought without any shadow of doubt.

Nope. What Bernadette really hated was what her mind and her… heart were telling her to watch on television. Her new drug. Her guilty (and shameful) pleasure: she was looking and loving Judging Amy reruns on streaming.

She was enjoying one of Raj’s snacks, all cozied up on her couch, a bit sad that she was starting the last season, when suddenly something caught her attention.

“What the…” She whispered with the apple chip mid-air. She frantically looked for the remote, restarted the episode from the beginning, and then, when that man suddenly appeared, she stopped the frame. “Oh my god!” She squealed at high voice, awakening her baby.

 Then, without carrying with the poor child, she grabbed her phone and called immediately Amy and Penny – not before both Raj and Stuart both burst into her living-room, almost falling into each other in their hurry to see what was wrong with her.   

“Are you having the baby?” “Is there, anything I can do?” They said at the same time, their voice overlapping as she looked at them exasperated and a tiny bit annoyed.

“What? No! I was just… you know what? Look at this!” She decided she couldn’t wait for Amy and Penny to get to her, and just had to show to someone what she had just discovered.

“Is that….” Stuart squeezed his eyes as to better see, so close to the screen that he was almost touching it with his nose.

“Oh my, that’s really…. He really looks like…. Hang on, do you think that….”

Bernadette nodded, grinning. “I know, It’s freaky, isn’t it?”

Raj nodded, a bit scared. “Yes, but I don’t know what’s freakier – that,” He pointed to the screen. “Or that, with all the new stuff on streaming, you watch Judging Amy.”

“Shut up, Raj, you even know the title of the show!” She hissed.

“Well, of course I do. And besides, there was Adrian Pasdar in it. And he is, like, one of the greatest sci-fi actors of all the times.”

They kept watching the episode on the couch, commenting – especially Raj – on Amy’s love-life and the likes, when, suddenly, Amy and Bernadette arrived, in company of their other halves – it was Stuart who opened the door up, and, as soon as he was done, he run into the kitchen, just to emerge a few seconds later with a string of garlic around his neck.

Penny simply turned to Bernadette. “Do I want to know?” She asked, meaning that no, she wasn’t really interested in the answer but she felt like she simply had to ask anyway.

The pregnant lady didn’t answer- she rolled her eyes and restarted the show, for all their eyes to see. “Just look at this!”

The newcomers – minus Sheldon who preferred to keep his distance - kneeled a little, hunched over the couch, and started at the screen, where, suddenly, the man appeared once again.

None of them said a word. Slowly, so, so slowly, in complete silence, with eyes and mouth wide open, they turned toward Sheldon.

“Do you think Stewart would share his garlic with me?” Leonard asked to Penny.

“What? C’mon, he can’t be a vampire! I mean, it’s daylight!” She answered her husband.

“Well, they do like the daylight in Twilight… and I think he is sparkling a little?” Amy squeezed her eyes and studied her significant other.

“Amy, honey, I’m pretty sure that’s just sweat.” Penny bit her lips.

“NONSENSE! I’ll let you know I have perfect perspiration!”

“Well, there was that one arc on X-Men, where they were fighting off vampires from Draculas’ son’s army, and they had found a way to stay out into the light….”

Sheldon rolled his eyes at his friend’s weird ideas, and then he shook his head. “You know, if I were to be a super-hero, I’d never be a character in X-Men. And anyway, I know I always say that I’m feel like batman – but I mean the Earth 1 version, not the Bloodrain iteration of the character from the elseword.” He paused. “Why are you accusing me of being a vampire for anyway’ Besides my good looks, of course.”

They silently moved from their spot before the screen, so that he could see for himself, he wasn’t surprised, thought, he just lifted an eyebrow at the sight of the man.

A man who looked exactly like him.

“So?”

“What do you mean, so? You either are an actor and you never told anyone, or you have a perfect doppelganger and it doesn’t bother you in the slightest!” Leonard almost screamed.

“Or he is a vampire actor.” Stuart added, but Sheldon sneered.

“Oh, please! I’ve always knew of that guy! Not that he had done this particular show, but I know he was around. He is my distant cousin Jim, he’s been trying to make it out as an actor for years now, but he hasn’t have his big break yet. Our mothers always said we were two peas in a pod, even if he way older than me. Mind you, we are so alike that I even asked him if he was interested in playing me on a movie about my life. A movie? Oh, like there’s not ton of material for fifteen years of TV!”

“Right. Because someone would definitely watch a TV Show about us.” Penny grimaced, almost imaging the opening theme. And who could get to play her.

“I can’t imagine how flattering it must be for him, always being confused with me!”