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Firefly Fields

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Tosaki’s surprised to see that the kitchen lights are on when he gets out of his room for a glass of water. He isn’t surprised, however, when he sees Nagai sitting on the table, snacking on a bag of chips.

He says nothing at first, walking silently and keeping visual contact with the other male, who just eats and observes him with a raised brow as Tosaki drinks his water at his own pace. A few seconds after he’s done, the man opens his mouth to actually speak.

“You shouldn’t be eating this right now. It’’s so unhealthy,” the observation makes Nagai roll his eyes momentarily. He's technically immortal; it's not like his eating habits should really matter.

“What’s your healthy snack suggestion, then? Mints?” He smiles at his own snarky remark. Surprisingly, Tosaki chuckles, finding it to be more amusing than annoying.

“Nice joke, Kei, but no,” he replies, adjusting his glasses on the bridge of his nose. Tosaki takes one of the chips and bites it, frowning after getting to feel the initial taste. It’s so salty and artificial tasting; he wonders how Nagai’s able to actually enjoy it to the point of eating a whole bag if left unsupervised.

Tosaki decides to chug a second glass of water, and Nagai is almost snorting at him. By now, Tosaki isn’t feeling that tired anymore and sees no point in going back to his room. Nagai doesn’t seems like he’s going to sleep soon as well. For a moment, he thinks that they could sit down and talk, but it doesn’t take long for the man to come up with a better idea.

“It’s a rather pleasant night, how about we go for a walk outside?” Nagai wonders if there’s something wrong in the chips because he really wasn’t expecting this question, at least not from Tosaki. The older male holds down a laugh at his confusion, but the amusement is clear in his blue eyes. “Or are you scared of monsters, Kei?”

“No!” Nagai answers immediately, getting up from his seat. His voice echoes in the room and he feels slightly ashamed for losing his composure, at least for a moment. He’s sure that Tosaki must be having a lot of fun with his reaction. “You know I’m not. Let’s go.”

If there’s somebody who should be scared of monsters, that one should definitely be Tosaki. However, he doesn’t show any fear, at least not when he’s on duty or when they’re discussing strategies. Still, Nagai knows there’s still fear in his heart; unlike him, he’s only human and he has many reasons to be afraid of pretty much everything that could hurt him, or at least that’s what Nagai believes.

The fresh air outside is delightful to both of them. Nagai’s grateful for the light coming from the street lamps, or else he’d get lost while Tosaki leads the way. Their base is far from the city, being surrounded by trees and a good chunk of open space. It’s different from their homes in the city, and much quieter too - all they can hear is the gentle ruffling of tree leaves, the occasional hoots from the owls and the sound of crickets in the distance.

They just walk at first, not exchanging a single word, with Nagai following Tosaki from behind while his vision gets used to the surroundings. Their steps are barely audible, and Nagai needs to follow Tosaki’s back, illuminated by the yellow lights coming from the lamps.

“So,” Nagai starts, deciding to break the silence between them. “Is there any reason for you to ask me to go out this late?”

“No, not really,” Tosaki answers, his voice as soft as the wind whispering on Nagai’s ears. “I just think there’s no reason for you to be moping around in the kitchen. Besides, it’s really nice and quiet out there. We should enjoy it while we can.”

Nagai knows what he’s talking about. The moment they’re sharing right now is the calm before the storm. It’s a rare and small moment of peace, and surprisingly enough, Nagai’s glad that he’s sharing it with Tosaki out of all the people he met during the last few weeks. While Tosaki isn’t immortal, he understands the difficult situation they’re getting into and what’s on stake. They have each other’s backs and sanity and it makes dealing with everything much easier.

“I guess you’re right,” Nagai replies. Tosaki doesn’t answer, and Nagai wonders if the man actually heard him. He decides to let it pass - sometimes, he feels that it’s better not to have an exact answer to something, at least not immediately. Still, there’s a lot going on inside Nagai’s mind right now, and he can’t help but pursue what he thinks it’s right.

“There’s something that I’d like to ask, if you don’t mind.” Tosaki turns to look at him. He doesn’t speak, but shrugs his shoulders. This gesture is enough for Nagai to know that he can go on.

For a brief moment he hesitates. Nagai wonders if asking what’s on his mind right now would ruin the moment they’re sharing. Still, it isn’t like that’s the worst he can say, not after their rough start; in fact, it feels like they both have this need to open up to each other, more and more, and perhaps their unplanned friendship is one of the best things that could have happened in this whole ordeal.

Besides, it’s not like they don’t deal with worse things out there. They both know that the next time the sun rises in the horizon they’re both going back to training and planning strategies for the sake of their lives and their futures.

“Aren’t you afraid of dying?” The question lingers in the air. Tosaki’s expression barely changes; there’s a hint of surprise in his raised brows, but there’s also understanding in his eyes, along with an absence of judgement - which, for Nagai, is comforting.

“Yes and no,” he answers, giving himself a few seconds of silence before going on. “Of course I’m afraid. Unlike you, I only live once. But at the same time, I wouldn’t mind dying if it’s for a good cause...”

He doesn’t bother completing the answer, and Nagai knows his reasons for it. Of course Tosaki would give everything - including his life - to protect the ones he loves. He may seem cold at first, but in the end he’s incredibly human.

“That’s surprisingly noble coming from you.” Nagai says, his tone making the commentary sound like a mixture of sarcasm and a genuine compliment, in a way that only Nagai is able to do - and that Tosaki grew up used to by now.

Tosaki chuckles. He doesn’t think that he’s really that noble, especially after all the things that happened during the last few weeks. However, to be called that is both an honor and a relief, even more so when he considers that Nagai, out of everyone he met so far in this journey, is the one assigning him that title.

They walk a little more, not sharing any words this time. Nagai speeds up so he could be at Tosaki’s side. It doesn’t take long for them both to come across something different enough to catch their attention.

Just by the side of the paved road, there’s an opening with no trees. The grass runs free in there, a patch of land untouched by civilization. What stands out the most, however, are the fireflies glowing and flying around peacefully, living their simple lifes without worries.

“Why don’t we go there?” Tosaki asks, his hand touching Nagai’s shoulder in gentle encouragement. The younger one nods, and they walk towards the open field.

The duo approaches the place with slow, careful steps, not wanting to scare the insects away. They don’t seem to mind the humans, though, and soon both Tosaki and Nagai sit down side by side on the grass, watching the fireflies circling around them, sometimes landing on their clothes and hair.

“So, Kei,” Tosaki begins, glancing at him briefly before going back to look at one of the tiny insects that decided to land on his hand. “You like fireflies?”

“Yeah,” he replies with a nod, making a bunch of fireflies that were on his head fly again, glowing as if they were some kind of magic dust. “They’re nice, I guess. I used to catch them when I was younger.”

The little anecdote is enough warm up Tosaki’s chest. Sometimes he forgets that Nagai is younger than him, and it’s interesting to see him opening up on his own way. Even after all that happened to him after he found out he’s immortal, there’s a hint of hope and youthful energy that Tosaki wouldn’t want to see going away from him, ever.

“Maybe next time we should bring some nets and jars,” the man says, letting a few insects land on his hand. He looks at them tenderly, interested in their natural lights. “I’m sure the others would like a little surprise.”

“Sounds good to me,” Nagai can’t help but smile at the idea. “We really should.”

Tosaki lays down, and the grass feels slightly ticklish against his skin. It feels good, however, and he relaxes, enjoying the view: the night sky is clear, with a full moon and the fireflies above him look like little stardust that came down from space just to greet him.

“I’m glad we’re allies now,” he muses, a soft smile forming on his lips. Nagai chuckles a little, laying down on his side. They look at each other and turn back to look up again.

The fireflies glow, making no distinction in species before landing on either of them. The moon and stars shine together, making the sky a dark canvas for them to fill up the blanks, to dream of better days and more moments like this one, where everything’s peaceful and they don’t have to worry about anything, just like the little insects glowing bright near them.

There’s hope growing inside them, just like their friendship. Tonight, they feel that there are some good things still worth fighting for.

“Me too.”