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Do I need to say I love you?

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I was finally in London. After years of working various part time jobs so I could finally have enough money to get away from my dysfunctional family. Sometimes I wondered wether I was adopted or wether my father  really was my biological father, because I barely looked anything like my parents, apart from my mother’s plain gray eyes. But after a paternity and maternity test I forced upon them my deepest fears were confirmed. I was indeed my mother and father’s daughter. My mom was a heroine addict and my father was an alcoholic. My dad had been an alcoholic for as long as I could remember, or more so it had started when I was 4 and he lost his job in the Netherlands and we moved to America. And with mom...let’s just say things went downhill for her when she found  out that my dad had an affair with a man. Dad tried telling her it didn’t mean anything to him, but the affair had been going on for about 10 years. Longer than mom and dad had been married. And when he first introduced me to who my mom liked to call “daddy’s special friend” he had called him his everything. So things weren’t looking great for mom. After my mother committed suicide I knew I had to get away.

They did a shit job at being parents. I think they had children at too young an age, they were children themselves when they had my sister Nikki. They were 15 for goodness sakes. They were 17 when they had me and 19 when they had my sister Isa. Nikki was older than me but she behaved like a child so I basically had to raise me and my siblings myself. For so long I had hoped my mom would just...die but. When I stood there next to dad watching her being cremated I...couldn’t help but cry. And now I was here in London. I was moving in with my sister Nikki until I could afford a place of my own. Nikki and I didn’t look like sisters at all. We both looked very different. My skin was pale as if it had never seen the sun. I had very crazy locks of curly red hair that were impossible to tame. I had very prominent cheekbones and my mother’s grey eyes whereas my sister had fair but sun touched skin and calm, straight blonde hair that reached her shoulders. Her cheekbones were not as prominent as mine and her eyes were blue like my father’s. We were very different in looks but we were sisters. And I was really glad she was letting me live with her for a while. 

I crossed street after street and realized this was going to be tiring because Nikki’s apartment was an hour away from the airport. Once I let myself risk crossing the main road I got hit by a car. Luckily they braked early enough so I was only hit lightly and it didn’t really hurt. A few seconds later 2 men came out of the car one looking worried for my life and the other his arms crossed shaking his head. The man with black locks of her went on his knees and frowned at me. “Are you okay miss?” He asked me smiling. “I’m fine” I mumbled frowning. The other guy went on his knees next to me too.  “What was that was that some kind of stupid suicide attempt or something?” The other guy the blonde haired man asked glaring at me. “I didn’t get hurt thanks for asking” I scoffed frowning at Blondie. He shook his head and scoffed as well. “It’s a main road for goodness sakes, why didn’t you take a cab or something?” He asked frowning at me. “No money” I said glaring at him “at least not enough”.  He frowned and sighed. “What didn’t mum and dad give you enough money to get a cab?” He asked frowning. And then I whacked him in the face causing him to fall back. He groaned in pain and the other one looked worried for a second before breaking into laughter. “Oh Roger are you alright darling?” Another guy asked getting out of the car and running to Blondie who’s name was apparently Roger. “This one’s a feisty one Fred” Roger said looking at the guy who had just gotten out of the car then glaring at me . “And this one’s an asshole” I said giving ROGER the finger. 

“He’s sorry” the guy with black locks of curly hair said shaking his head stifling a laugh “I’m Brian by the way”. I sighed and smiled at him. “Lana” I said smiling at Brian. Roger began laughing and I just wanted to smack him again and so I did. “Oww” He squealed in pain “I’m sorry it’s just you do know what word your name makes if you spell it backwards”. “Are you in kindergarten?” I asked glaring at Roger. “No” Roger said glaring at me. “Then grow up” I said glaring at him. “I like who I am thank you” Roger said taking me by the collar of my shirt and pulling me closer to him. “Oh I know a prick” I said glaring at him. “That’s not quite the word I was looking for” Roger said glaring right back at me “Alright darling’s lets all stop acting like children, Lana darling could we just give you some cash and get over it, we have a concert to get to” the guy who had gotten out of the car a minute ago ...Fred said frowning at me. “A concert?” I asked raising my eyebrows. “Yes, have you not heard of Queen, we’re kind of famous” Roger said frowning at me. it made sense. Fred...Freddie Mercury, Roger...Roger Taylor. Of course I knew who Queen was. My sister was a huge fan and I had a few records and had learned some of Roger’s parts by heart. But Roger was to much a prick and was ridiculously adorable being one to relieve him of the frustration of me not knowing who Queen was. “No, no I don’t” I said frowning. Roger scoffed shaking his head. “It’s Fine Roger not everyone knows Queen we’ve only gotten 2 albums out so far” Brian May said frowning. “How about you come to our concert?”. Nikki would love me for getting her into a Queen concert. “Alright deal, but can I bring my sister with me?” I asked smiling. “Of course darling bring your whole family for all I care we love a big crowd” Freddie said smiling. “Uhhh Maybe not” I said chuckling “my mom committed suicide and my dad’s a drunk so I think it’ll just be me and my sister” I said frowning. 

Roger’s hostile expression changed into a more friendly one. “I’m sorry” he said frowning at me. I sighed and smiled at him. “It’s Alright” I said smiling at him. Roger pulled out some cash, wrote something down on it and gave it to me. “Here your pity money, get yourself a cab” Roger said chuckling. I rolled my eyes and got up with Roger and Brian’s help. They both helped me gather my stuff. Roger picked up my suitcase that had my drum set in it. “You play?” Roger asked me smiling. I nodded smiling at him. We gathered all my stuff then I walked away. “Give me a call, when you get home I’ll tell you when it starts” Roger said grabbing my hand before I could walk. I nodded smiling at him and gave Brian a kiss on the cheek. “See you later Roger Meddows Taylor” I said waving and walking away. This was going to be interesting. 


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After a while of walking I was able to find a cab. I got in and drove to Nikki’s apartment. I payed maxing sure not to use one of the bill Roger had given me with a, I’m guessing his number on it. Nikki’s apartment building looked very dodgy which was to be expected my sister being the cheapskate that she was. Nikki liked to pretend she was a glamorous girl who spent her money on the craziest things but she wasn’t. No Nikki van Dijk was a girl that would go to a store Kilometers away rather than go to the store right next to her house just because things were cheaper there. This was something I expected, I wasn’t really surprised. 

I went to the fifth floor and looked for apartment 5d. There were a bunch of creeps sitting on the ground and would whistle at me as I walked by. I’d just glare at them and tell them I had a boyfriend even though... I did not. After a while of searching I found apartment 5b. I rang the doorbell and Nikki opened the door a second later and attacked me with a bone crushing hug. “You look a mess” Nikki said looking me up and down. I chuckled and shook my head smiling. “Yeah I kind of got into an accident” I said frowning at Nikki. “Shit are you okay?” Nikki asked her hand over her mouth. “I’m fine Nik, anyways I have good news for you” I said smiling at Nikki. “What?” Nikki asked me gesturing for me to come inside. I put my stuff down on the floor and clapped my hands together smiling at Nikki. “We’re going to a Queen concert” I said smiling at Nikki. Nikki looked at me mouth hanging open. “Oh my god how did you make that possible, Lana you’ve just made my dreams come true!” Nikki said beaming. I chuckled shaking my head at her smiling. “Wow if all your dreams are this shallow and easy to fulfill you’re going to die very happy” I said chuckling. Nikki rolled her eyes. “Anyways...have you got a telephone around here?” I asked Nikki with a smile.“Yeah” Nikki said pointing at a green phone. I nodded and made my way to the telephone. I dialed Roger’s number and soon enough he answered the phone. 

“Roger  Meddows Taylor here, who is this?” Roger asked. I smiled “Lana, I’m not telling you my middle name, van Dijk” I said frowning. “Lana you made it home safely?” Roger asked. “I did thank you for worrying about me” I said frowning. “Oh no I was just worried you might sue me and the rest  of Queen you don’t know how bad that would look for us” Roger said in a teasing voice. “You’re such a prick” I said giggling and shaking my head. “I know so are you coming to the show or not?” Roger asked me. “Coming, like I already told Brian” I said frowning. “Right, Right it’s in the Dagenham Roundhouse just so you know. ” Roger said “Be there at 7 and Tell the wankers checking tickets that  you’re here for Roger Taylor”. I smiled nodding. “Alright I’ll be there” I said smiling. “Good” Roger said “wear something nice, for me”. I chuckled and shook my head. “And why would I do anything after you almost ran over me and why the heck would I dress up for you?” I asked chuckling. Roger Taylor was really...he was a prick. “Because...forget I said anything” Roger groaned. “Since when are we friendly with each other anyways?” I asked chuckling. “Ummm since... I gave you pity money because I found out your parents are messed up and that you play the drums?” Roger said it sounding more like a question than a statement. “Ok” I said chuckling “Is this a pity friendship?”. “This is a pity friendship” Roger admired chuckling a bit. I shook my head smiling. “Oh hey bring your sticks” Roger said. “Drum sticks?” I asked frowning. “Well what else would I mean?” Roger asked. “And why am I supposed to bring my sticks?” I asked frowning. “So I can hear you drum?” Roger asked frowning. I scoffed and shook my head frowning “Not a chance Taylor” I said frowning. “Alright, Fine then don’t bring them, I’ll see you there though?” Roger asked me. I smiled and nodded. “I’ll see you Roger” I said before hanging up the call. 

“What the heck was that?” Nikki asked me with a raised eyebrow. “What the heck was what?” I asked with a shrug. “ just...were you just talking to Roger Taylor?” Nikki asked shocked. “Oh yeah” I said smiling. “How?...” Nikki asked confused. “Oh he hit me with his car” I said frowning. “WHAT?!?!?!?” Nikki asked shocked. “Yeah and as an apology Brian invited us to come to their show and Brian just called to tell me where to go and when” I said smiling. “Oh my god Lana!” Nikki said excitedly. “Alright will you show me to my room, we have to go in an hour” I said frowning. “An hour Lana that’s not enough time!” Nikki said. She quickly showed me to my room and ran to hers. I sighed and closed the door behind me. I opened my suitcase and set up my drum set. Then I looked at my clothes and wondered what I should wear to the concert. I decided to wear my floral boho dress with leather choker necklace. I put on  minimal amount of makeup and tied my crazy hair into a half up knot. I kept my black combat boots on. I then went outside and headed to Nikki’s room. She wore a pastel dress that was just so originally Nikki. I chuckled and smiled at her. I helped her with her makeup and by the time we were finished it was time to go. We drove to Dagenham Roundhouse with a cab. 

I pulled out a nervous and excited Nikki with me and squeezed my way through the crowd who sometimes scolded me to which I would retaliate by giving them the finger or just glaring at em. The guy at the door raised an eyebrow at me once I reached the front. “You do realize that there is a line” he said frowning at me. “I do...I’m here for Roger Taylor” I said frowning. “Just for Roger that’s a shame the rest of them here are here for all of Queen” the guy said frowning. I groaned and shook my head frowning. I didn’t know what to tell the guy. “Tell him his girlfriend Lana van Dijk is here” Nikki said smiling sheepishly. I gave her a light kick on the shin which I hadn’t realized was not so light until she winced in pain. The guy looked me up and down. “You’re Lana?” He asked me smiling. I nodded smiling. He went inside and returned with Roger. The fans screamed and security had to hold em back. “Hello my love” He said smirking. “Hey” I said trying to hide my smile. He looked to Nikki and smiled at her as well. “Come in” He said smiling and pulling us inside.

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“ “You came” Roger said smiling at me. “Indeed” I said smiling at him. “Who’s this gorgeous lady?” Roger asked taking Nikki’s hand and kissing it. Nikki looked at me wide eyed. “Hey go easy on her she’s still a bit freaked out” I said with a chuckle. Roger nodded and smiled at her. “I apologize” Roger said smiling at Nikki. Nikki nodded still wide eyed. “Roger Taylor” Roger said smiling at her. “Ni...Nik...You can call me Nik” Nikki said smiling. “It’s a pleasure to meet you Nik” Roger said smiling at Nikki before turning to me with a mischievous smile “You not so much”. I punched him in the shoulder playfully and he winced in fake hurt. I chuckled. “Come let’s get you to the front before the rest of the crowd eat you for dinner” Roger said smiling. I rolled my eyes and followed Roger in. We went towards the stage and  saw  Freddie and the rest of the band setting up. Nikki and I weren’t the only ones inside. A woman with blonde hair looking onto the stage was there too. She turned to us when she  saw us come in. She smiled at me and I smiled back at her. “I’m Mary” She called as we made  our way to the front. Of course...Mary Austin. Freddie Mercury’s Girlfriend. “Lana I think I’m going to faint” Nikki said next to me. “Oh do you need anything, some water perhaps?” Roger asked Nikki smiling. “No thank you Roger I’m fine” Nikki said smiling. 

We stood next to Mary and introduced ourselves. “I’m Lana” I said smiling at Mary then gesturing towards Nikki “This is Nikki my sister, you can call her Nik. She’s freaking out a little”. Mary chuckled and smiled sympathetically at  Nikki. “It’s a lot Nik I get it” Mary said smiling at Nikki. Nikki nodded still very freaked out. “Just remember to take deep breaths and have fun” Mary said smiling at Nikki. “Thanks for the advice” Nikki said breathing in and out and calming down a little. “Where’d Roger find you?” Mary said smiling at me “I’ve got to say Roger has an awesome taste in girls”. I chuckled smiling at Mary. “Thanks” I said smiling at Mary “But we’re not...not dating”. Mary raised an eyebrow and smiled at me. “Well could have fooled me, he definitely likes you” Mary said with a smile. “No he doesn’t” I said looking to Roger who was on stage and winked at me. “Oh my god Lana he so does” Nikki said freaking out beside me. “Guys he probably has a girlfriend anyways” I said a little bit too loudly. “Actually I don’t” Roger said. Crap...he heard us. I covered my face in Nikki’s shoulder which was probably as red as a tomato. I covered my face in Nikki’s shoulder until the show began. I was embarrassed when I realized Roger was still looking at me. He was staring at me and looked as if I were a piece of meat or something. 

The show was wonderful, I knew the lyrics to most of them. When the show ended Nikki, Mary and I watched as the crowd left slowly. Then Roger hopped off stage and headed towards us. “Did you enjoy the show?” Roger asked me with a smile. “Were you staring at me the entire show?” I asked knowing the answer to that question. Roger chuckled scratching the back of his head. Was he blushing?!?!? And why did I find that so adorable?!?!?!? I smiled and shook my head. “You were amazing” I said smiling at Roger. Roger eyes lingered on my lips for a second before looking away. “Thanks” He said smiling at me “Hey sorry I was a prick when we met, it’s just we were in a hurry and we weren’t expecting to hit a person and I was already a bit annoyed with my car was acting up”. “It’s Fine” I said smiling at him. Roger  nodded smiling at me. “We came her by cab do you have space in your car by any chance?” I asked Roger frowning. “Are you joking we’re going out for a drink we’re not going home quite yet Lana” Roger said smiling at me. Nikki looked around wide eyed and freaked out. “Up for it Nik?” Roger asked Nikki smiling. “It’s been amazing but I think I want to go home now, it’s been a lot” Nikki said smiling at Roger apologetically. Brian hopped off the stage and headed towards us. “I could drive you home if you like” Brian said smiling at Nikki. “I’d like that” Nikki said smiling at Brian. Brian nodded. Nikki hugged me before leaving with Brian. 

“What about you?” Roger asked me “you still up for drinks?”. “Always up for drinks” I said smiling at Roger. “Deaky?” Roger asked John smiling. “Nah Rog I’m fine, I’m heading home myself” John said with a smile. “Fred?” Roger asked Freddie with a frown. “You know I’d love to darling but Deaky’s our ride” Freddie told Roger with a frown. “Oh ok” Roger said frowning. Mary smiled at me and gave me her number before leaving with John and Freddie. “I guess it’s just you and me” Roger said smiling at me. “I guess it is” I said smiling at Roger. We then took a seat at the bar and just stared at each other in peaceful silence. “Did you know that what you drink says a lot about you as a person?” Roger asked with a smile. “Oh really what would you order for me then?” I asked Roger, a mischievous smile on my face. “A shot and a beer? You still read paper books and write with a pencil. You have dreams of fixing up a motorcycle. You do not like your birthday, or any holiday really, except for bank holidays because you get the day off. You like routine. You prefer small groups over large ones. Your preferred party position is at the bar down the street?” Roger asked with a frown. I smiled and nodded. “That sounds correct, I do have dreams of fixing up a motorcycle” I said smiling. “’re my dream woman” Roger said smiling at me. Wait...was Roger Taylor flirting with me? “Thanks” I said blushing. After another minute of awkward silence Roger ordered me my shot and a beer. For himself her ordered a whiskey. 

“So ummm where are you from...originally?” Roger asked me with a smile. “Netherlands” I said smiling “but we moved to the U.S when I was 4” I said smiling at Roger. “Nice, tell me something in Dutch” Roger said smiling. “Je bent echt vriendelijk wanneer je bent niet een prat” I said telling him he was really kind when he wasn’t being a prat. “Hey I understood the word prat, I told you that you’re my dream woman and you sit here telling me I’m a prat?” Roger asked with a frown. “No” I said giggling “well not really...I said you’re really kind when you’re not being a prat”. Roger broke into laughter and so did I. “Is this your way of flirting Lana van Dijk?” Roger asked chuckling. “I’m sorry I’ve never done this before” I said frowning. “I struggle to believe that” Roger said with a smile. “Oh really” I asked hiding my face from him. Roger then took my face in his hands and drew circles on my cheek. “Really” He said frowning “you’re absolutely gorgeous”. I could melt right here and now. Luckily our drinks arrived and we drank our drinks. “So you know my parents are messed up and that I play the drums but, you haven’t told me anything about you” I said frowning at Roger. “What would you like to know?” Roger asked me smiling. “Anything” I said smiling.

And so we just sat there telling each other about our lives. I was having a really good time with him, the first good time I had had in ages. “So why did your mom commit suicide?” Roger asked me confused once we got to that topic again. “It’ mother and father had my sister Nikki who is actually the eldest one at a very young age. They were 15 and dad was struggling a bit with his sexuality. But mom didn’t know any of this and they just kept it coming with kids. Me and then my little sister Isa. But then mom found out that my dad had been having an affair with a guy for 10 years and mom and dad had just married after Isa was born and she discovered heroin, and then when that wasn’t helping anymore she...shot herself in the head...right in front of me” I said letting a tear escape my eye. Roger frowned and jumped out of his seat. Then he hugged me. “I’m sorry you had to deal with that” Roger said frowning at me. I wiped the tear away and shook my head frowning. “It’s fine” I said sighing. Roger held my hand and sighed “I’m sorry” he said repeating himself. I didn’t say anything for a while. We paying and Roger drove me home.

“I don’t like this place one bit” Roger said as I got out of the car. I smiled at him and shook my head smiling. “I know it’s dodgy as hell but it’s my home, Nikki loves it” I said smiling at Roger. Roger parked his car and got out. “What are you doing?” I asked raising an eyebrow at him. “I’m making sure you get him safely” Roger said taking my hand and walking with me. Once we were outside my apartment we stopped. For a moment we just stared at each other and smiled. “Go on Tour with me, we leave for Cheltenham tomorrow” Roger said taking my hands in his. “No” I said shaking my head frowning “I don’t know Roger”. “Please?” Roger asked frowning at me. “I can’t” I said shaking my head “I’ll see you when you get back”. Roger smiled and nodded. “I understand you have a life here now” Roger said frowning. “Yeah Roger I just got here” I said frowning at him “I start work tomorrow”. “I’ll call you everyday then” Roger said smiling at me putting a strand of my red hair behind my ear. “You better” I said frowning at him. Then he kissed me. He actually kissed me. My head stopped functioning and my heart went insane. Here I was in London kissing Roger Taylor. This was actually happening. I let my face cup his cheeks and he did the same. We were kissing and we turned into one. I gave him one more quick peck before pulling away smiling. Roger smiled once we pulled away. “That happened” he said smiling. “Indeed” I said with a smile. I then opened the door and was surprised to find Brian May and my sister...kissing. “Uh...Wow” I said looking at them. They quickly pulled away and stared at us blushing. “I was just heading out” Brian said embarrassed. Kissing Nikki once more before running out the door hiding behind Roger. Roger hugged me before leaving with an embarrassed Brian May. 

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 And luckily I went to bed without Nikki bringing up the events of tonight. I went to bed and surprisingly I slept through. I didn’t actually have a job...yet but I decided to head to Biba. I found Mary easily and was delighted when she recognized me. “Lana” Mary said smiling at me. I went over to her and smiled. “Hi” I said smiling at her. “What are you doing here?” Mary asked me with a smile. “I was wondering if you knew...wether Biba was hiring?” I asked Mary hoping she wouldn’t reject me. Wouldn’t tell me flat out that there weren’t any jobs available for me. “We’re always hiring come I’ll bring you to the manager” Mary said smiling at me. So we went to the manager. Barbara Hulanicki.

Once she heard Mary she turned around for a brief second and smiled. “Ah Mary what is it you need?” Barbara asked her when she turned back so she was no longer facing Mary. Then Barbara Hulanicki turned back around and smiled at you. “You’re gorgeous are you new?” Mrs.Hulanicki said smiling at me. “No Mrs. Hulanicki but I was wondering if you were hiring” I asked smiling nervously. “You’re gorgeous darling, of course we’ll hire you we love gorgeous women. Now you and Mary will be working the booth together if it’s alright with you?” Barbara Hulanicki asked smiling me. I nodded my head smiling like an idiot. “Good we can sign a Contract tomorrow cause I haven’t prepared it yet but you can start today and get a welcome check today if you want” Barbara Hulanicki said smiling. “Thank you Ma’am” I said smiling. “Oh and sweetheart do call me Barbara. Calling me Mrs. Hulanicki makes me feel old and wrinkly” Barbara Hulanicki said smiling at me. I nodded at her and went out of her office with Mary. Mary and I looked at each other and squealed happily. We went back downstairs and saw Freddie and Roger standing there. 

“Lana?” Roger asked me smiling “You work here?”. I nodded smiling at him. “Lana darling I thought we’d see you only once we got back from tour” Freddie said smiling at me “Thank god we can say our proper goodbyes here”. I smiled at Freddie and gave him a hug. “Take care of yourself darling” Freddie said. I smiled and hugged him tightly. Once we pulled away from our embrace he went to kiss Mary goodbye while I stood before Roger smiling at him. He took my hands in his “I didn’t see you being a Biba girl” Roger said with a chuckle. “Well I come with surprises” I told Roger smiling at him. Roger chuckled smiling at me.  “I love surprises” Roger said smiling at me. I smiled at Roger and he smiled back at me. I wanted him to have fun during his tour, I knew the question was in his head wether he was mine and wether I was his? But I didn’t want us to become my parents and I wanted him to have fun and meet the most different girls. And I wanted to meet the most different guys...and also the most different girls. This was something Roger did not know about me. I was bisexual. 

“Are we? Are you? Am I yours?” Roger asked giving my hands a squeeze. I smiled at him. “You are your own person Roger. I like you, a lot after such a short time of knowing each other which is really scary. But I don’t want to tie you down and if I’m being honest I don’t want to be tied down either. I think monogamy is a mistake at such young an age” I said frowning at Roger. Roger frowned and smiled at the same time. “Are you saying that we are... you want to be with me but physically be with other people too?” Roger asked smirking. “That is what I’m saying” I said smiling at him “but there is a twist, I want you to call every day and tell me about your...experiences...oh and you can only have sex with them once am I making myself clear?”. “You’re amazing” Roger said lifting me off my feet and twirling me around. Once he put me down we kissed. It was different than our first kiss. This time he let his tongue lick my lip. I let his tongue in and our tongues fought over dominance. I ended up winning and we just kissed for a minute until we heard a cough beside us. We pulled away to find Freddie standing there smiling, his hands pressed together. “Lana darling I hate to interrupt, but I have to take Roger away now” Freddie said smiling at me. I nodded and kissed Roger one last time. “I’ll see you” Roger said smiling at me. I nodded smiling at him. “Bye Lana”Freddie said giving me a big, bone crushing hug.

Once they left Mary led me to a little room and gave me my uniform I wore it then went to another little booth with lots of records. “Which one should we play?” Mary asked smiling at me. I looked through the records and saw a few that I knew. At the end we went for Jimi Hendrix Rainbow Bridge. Mary tapped her foot to the beat of the music and I did the same. “So how did you meet the boys is true Roger hit you with his car?” Mary asked me still dancing to the music. “It’s true” I said also dancing to the music “I had just came to London and I didn’t have enough money to get a cab and Roger was a jerk about it”. “So how’d you turn out to like him then?” Mary asked me resting her elbow on her shoulder. “I don’t know I guess it just happened” I said smiling at Mary “How did you turn out to like Freddie?”. “He was different than any guy I had met before and he was really lovely, and like a few years later he proposed...oh we’re engaged did I tell you that?” Mary said smiling. She showed me the ring and smiled at me. “Oh it’s lovely” I said smiling at Mary. Freddie was a very lucky man. I had only known Mary for a short while but she was awesome. “So why’d you come to London?” Mary asked me smiling. “Oh I...I wanted to escape my family” I said frowning at Mary. “Oh why?” Mary asked me frowning. “Oh my mother and father are pretty messed up. Dad is a drunk and mom was a heroin addict” I said frowning. “Was?” Mary asked me frowning. “Yeah...or maybe she’s found heroin in hell!” I said with furrowed eyebrows. “Oh my god I’m so sorry” Mary said realizing that my mother was dead “how did she die?”. “Suicide” I said frowning at her. Mary put a hand on my shoulder and smiled at me. “Sorry for your loss” Mary said smiling. Then she hugged me and it felt nice. It felt really nice to have a friend to talk to that wasn’t Roger. Or Nikki 


Chapter Text

After my shift I got my welcome check and Mary and I went separate ways. Mary went hom and I looked around in town. I passed by a store with lots of art supplies so I decided to go in and buy a few things, since I had left most of my art supplies at home. Painting, drawing and all that Jazz was something I loved to do, but after mom died and I left to go to London I left everything behind. At the art supply store I bought an easel, some paint, paintbrushes and a few canvases. Then I went back home. Nikki left a note on the door saying that she had headed to work. I went to my room and put the stuff I had bought down.

I grabbed a glass from the kitchen, filled it with water and put it down on the easel. I then took out an old shirt that was already covered in dry paint from my suitcase and wore it. I took a canvas and put that on the easel too. Then I began painting. At the beginning I wasn’t really sure what I was painting but it was turning out to be a painting of me holding my mother‘s hand. She had a heroin needle in her arm and looked like death. After about 2 hours I was finished painting. Nikki stuck her head in my door and smiled at me. “You’re painting again!” Nikki said walking over to me. She looked at the painting and smiled sadly. “It’s beautiful Lana” Nikki said smiling sadly. She wrapped her arms around me from behind as we both looked at my painting. “Thanks” I said squeezing Nikki’s arms. “So what was that with you and Roger last night?” Nikki asked smiling at me. “What was that with you and Brian?” I asked smirking at Nikki. “I asked you first” Nikki said sticking out her tongue at me smiling. “Fine” I groaned frowning at Nikki. “Roger and I are taking things slow if you must know. We both really like each other but he’s free to have sexual intercourse with who ever he meets on the road and I am allowed to do the same, but he has to call after or before he does something with someone else to tell me about it and can only sleep with a person once” I said smiling. “Wait you’re letting your boyfriend sleep with other people?” Nikki asked me frowning. I nodded smiling at Nikki. “Wow” Nikki said smiling shocked. “You’re turn” I said smiling at Nikki. “Well...if you must know things are going...he came over to say goodbye today and...we’re going steady” Nikki said smiling. I nudged her playfully smirking. “Wow you move quickly” I said smiling at Nikki. Nikki shook her head at me smiling. 

Nikki and I both jumped in surprise when we heard the doorbell. I ran to the kitchen and opened it to find Roger, Brian, John, Freddie and Mary standing there. I looked at Roger and gave him a quick kiss. Nikki went the dramatic route and jumped into Brian’s arms. I looked to Freddie and smiled at me. “Hey darling” Freddie said smiling at me. “Hey Freddie” I said hugging him tightly “what are you guys doing here?”. “Our Show in Cheltenham is over and we thought we’d come visit our new, dearest friends.” Freddie said smiling at me. We invited the guys in. Roger smiled at me. “Why are you covered in paint?” Roger asked me holding my hand. “Oh I’ve been doing some painting” I said smiling at him. “You paint?” He asked me smiling. I nodded smiling at him. “Come” I said leading him to my bedroom. I showed him the picture of me holding my dead mother’s hand. Roger wrapped his arms around my waist from behind and rested his chin on my shoulder. “It’s gorgeously sad Lana” Roger said smiling. I smiled back at him. “It was pretty therapeutic for me” I said looking at the painting. “Lana I slept with someone that wasn’t you” Roger said sounding sorry for some reason. “Well that’s okay, how was it?” I asked smiling at him. “Wait you’re really alright with me sleeping with other people?” Roger asked me frowning. I nodded smiling at him. “You’re really something else Lana van Dijk” Roger said smiling. “How was it?” I asked Roger smiling. “It was good” Roger said smiling. “Was she pretty?” I asked him smiling. “She was pretty but nowhere as pretty as you.” Roger said kissing my shoulder. I turned around and kissed him. We pulled away smiling after a minute of kissing. Freddie and Mary went into my room with Nikki and Brian and Freddie’s eyes landed on the painting on my easel. He walked towards it and studied it. “You painted this darling?” Freddie asked me smiling. “Indeed” I said smiling at Freddie. “It’s wonderful darling” Freddie said staring at it. “Thanks” I said smiling at him. “No I think you should really do something with this” Freddie said staring at the painting. “Do you take commissions darling?”. I hadn’t really thought of it before. I mean that would help me money wise. “Sure....yes I take commissions” I said smiling at Freddie. “Could you paint someone if I gave you a picture of them?” Freddie asked smiling. “I think so” I said smiling at Freddie. “Alright then, I would like you to paint my mother as a queen in the 15th century, maybe standing next to Leonardo Da Vinci or something” Freddie said handing me a picture of his mother “I want to give it to her for her birthday”. I smiled nodding at Freddie. “I’ll get it to you as soon as I possibly can” I said smiling at Freddie. “Thank you darling” Freddie said hugging me. He then took out his wallet and gave me 10.000 Pounds. “Freddie I don’t need 10.000 pounds I’d be happy with 500” I said frowning. “No I’m giving you 10.000” Freddie said his arms  crossed. I didn’t know him that long but I knew that marked the end of that discussion. 

I smiled at Freddie and took the 10.000 pounds. “Thank you Freddie” I said smiling at him. “Oh no need to thank me darling” Freddie said hugging me. Mary joined our hug and soon enough it became a group hug. I was really enjoying life in London. It was amazing. I wondered wether I would have enjoyed it this much if Roger hadn’t hit me with his car when I first arrived.