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What Do You Fall For?

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Disclaimer: Bleach and HP aren't mine




Hanataro was pretty sure that he wasn't a mission Shinigami, but that still didn't explain the hell butterfly steadily making its way to him as he healed another injured division eleven member. Raising a finger while keeping the other pulsing with healing kido on a long cut (most likely from Captain Zaraki himself), Hanataro blinked listening to a message only he could hear.

The seventh seat gasped before he whispered a reply to the small butterfly before launching it off. Glancing down the knocked out the eleventh member he was healing, he leaned over a picked up his zanpakuto. Unsheathing it, he looked down at the eleventh member.

"O-oh, uh, Bekon-san*, m-may I.. I st-stab you real, uh, quick?"

The eleventh division member didn't respond, because after all, he was knocked out, courtesy of most likely Captain Zaraki. So Hanataro took it upon himself to quickly stab the man with Hisagomaru, the familiar red smoke emitting from the wounds and filling up the meter to about a fifth.

He then ran around the division, stabbing other injured people with his zanpakuto, healing them and bring the measure to around seven of an eighth.

The fourth division heard his zanpakuto from his world hum contently, smiling as he placed away the medical supplies he was previously using.

Hanataro shifted Hisagomaru to rest on his waist, before running out, alerting another fourth member on his way out. He made his way toward the first division, jogging in the direction and luckily avoiding roaming Shinigami that were most likely to pick on him. The seventh seat huffed as he finally arrived at the first division, before heading into the soutaichou's office.

"Uh- Soutaichou, you, uh, c-called?"

The old man glanced up, beckoning Hanataro to sit down in the chair in front of his desk. "Hanataro Yamada, seventh of the fourth division, you've been chosen for this mission."

"We've known about a different community of humans with a strange type of energy in the country of England for many years and have dismissed them. But the newly appointed Central 46 has decided to rule them as a potential threat*, despite the fact that we have some of their kind amongst us who tell us that they are peaceful."

Yamamoto crossed his fingers leaning on his desk. "You are to go their the school to decided if they are a threat or not. The mission length will take about eight years, but in between you will most likely return back to soul society to assist with damages or whatever situation that calls for your healing experience."

"Another reason you've been sent to the wizarding school this close to ex-captain Aizen's betrayal is because of another rising threat in the wizarding community. A man named Voldemort is a small threat, but still must be dealt seeing as he somehow split his soul into seven parts."

"There is another reason specifically you have been sent," Yamamoto glanced out the window before his gaze rested upon the fourth member. "To put it simply, you are plain."

Hanataro nodded, taking no offense.

"You are as well the right stature to attend to this mission, so you can blend in. In you is also the energy found in about four Shinigami in souls society, you, Captain Hitsugaya, Lieutenant Kusajishi, and the barest hint in Kuchiki Rukia." The Soutaichou sighed, fingers combing through his long beard. "Unfortunately, the twelfth has also located some energy in the Ichigo Kurosaki, but he will not be in the mission."

"You are to be sent to the living word where Urahara Kisuke will equip you with your gigai, and you are to attract attention as often as you can without suspicion. You will be doing that in England, the home of the 'wizards' with him acting as your guardian. He will seal away your reitasu when you are outside his shop, and doing so will cause 'magic' to flare up at random times in public areas. The magical community will notice the outbursts, and will somehow contact you according to one of our shinigami who used to be a wizard."

"Leave for the living word at ten o'clock sharp tomorrow, Captain Ukitake will open the sekimon for you, gather your supplies. Captain Unohana will send fresh medical supplies every month or so, good luck dismissed."

Hanataro bowed, before backing out the office. Once he was sure he was out of sight of the Soutaichou, he broke off in a sprint, racing back to the fourth. 'What the hell kind of school is one called 'Hogwarts'?'


"Unohana-taichou?" Hanataro poked his head into his captain's office, said captain glancing up at the seventh seat.

"Ah, hello Hanataro, what could I do for you?" The kind looking lady smiled as she continued to sign and read over her paperwork.

"Uh, could y-you help me pack my s-supplies for a mission?" Hanataro twidled his fingers as he anxiously looked at the fourth division's captain. "D-despite what some members in the fourth d-division think, uh, I kn-know that some... that some of my supplies a-are fake."

Unohana froze, her 'Hey-get-back-in-bed-before-I-disembowel-you' slowly making her way across her face as she placed down her pen. "Is that so? Very well, I will help you. I'll make sure to have a talk with your division members.

She pushed away from her desk, standing up and leading Hanataro to the medical supply area. "I'll give you some extra just in case, as well as some new ones. Maybe I should give you a medical kido scroll as well."

Hanataro shivered slightly due to the fact that Unohana's 'calm' smile still rested upon her face.


"Alrighty Hanataro, off you go!" Ukitake shoved the poor fourth division member into the sekimon, the hell butterfly following and taking the lead a second later. Hanataro stumbled before the sekimon doors slid shut behind him. The butterfly hovered, before it began to move, at a jogging pace, most likely to the fact the Hanataro had yet to learn shunpo.

After a bit of jogging in the dark, the hell butterfly flew through a sekimon door, Hanataro following behind.

Then Hantaro tripped, tumbling across the floor and landing before someone's feet.

"You're Hanataro Yamada correct?" A voice rang out, amusement clear in their voice.

"Uh- Hai," Hanataro scrambled to his feet, glancing at the voice. It was a man, wearing strange getup and a bucket hat. "You- Uh, You are U-Urahara Kisuke?"

"Yup!" Urahara snapped open a fan in front of his face, smiling behind it, "Welcome to the Urahara shop!"

Finally looking around, Hanataro found himself in a candy store.

"Th-this is a, um, v-very nice shop Urahara-San."

"Oh please call me Urahara!"

"Urahara-san" Hanataro insisted. "The, uh, Sou-Soutaichou said you had a gi-gigai made for, uh, me?"

Urahara nodded, his eyes gleaming. "We also got the information packet for this, quite a long mission yes?"

"Eight years m-most likely."

Urahara smiled as a cat began making its way toward them. "Alrighty, we've already been relocated to England, a Urahara shop setting up courtesy of the Soutaichou himself to make you cover more believable. We'll take another sekimon there in two weeks, if I may ask, what are your skills?"

Hanataro blinked, glancing down at the cat who sat itself down on his feet. "Uh, I-I'm not very strong, compared... compared t-to other shi-Shinigami."

The blond shopkeeper laughed, his fan flashing open again. "I'm sure we all have our strengths and our weaknesses, mind telling me yours?"

"O-oh uh, I'm from the- I'm from the fourth division, and I uh, I'm the seventh seat." Hanataro twiddled with his fingers. "My uh, Zanpakuto specializes in uh- healing. It heals whatever it, Uh, it heals whatever it touches."

Urahara looked interested, eyes flicking to the handle of Hisagomaru. "Then how do you deal damage?"

Hanataro gave Urahara a quick glance before he slowly pulled out his zanpakuto from the sheath. "When I-uh, heal enough people to p-put enough energy to the r-red line. Hisa-Hisagomaru turns into Shikai and then-then I can deal da-damage."

"What is the skill of your zanpakuto when it is in Shikai?" Urahara studied the measurer on the flat of Hanataro's blade.

"Ca-can we have more ro-room?" Hanantaro's hands shook slightly. "I-I'm going to need a wounded person in Uh, in order t-to activate Shikai."

"Ah yes, follow me."

Hanataro followed after Urahara as he first led him to a closed off room, throwing it open. "Rise and shine Ichigo!"

Hanataro yelped and pushed aside Urahara. "Kurosaki-san, what d-did you do now?"

Blearily, the orange head- yet to be fully awake blinked. "Uh."

Urahara chuckled, fan covering his mouth. "Ichigo-chan here got into a fight with a couple of tricky menos grande and other hollows, and Orihime isn't around to heal him yet. She's currently on a trip to China, and won't be due back until next week."

"Don't call me 'chan' getaboshi," Ichigo grumbled, eyes waking up as he glanced over at the new arrival. "Oh, hey Hanata, why are you here? And Getaboshi, how did you know Orihime was on a trip and when'd she get back?"

"O-oh, I'm here on a mission in England." Hanataro moved over to Ichigo's side, raising his zanpakuto.

"W-wait what are you doing?" Ichigo's eyes widened as he glanced over at Urahara. Said man smiled and did nothing as Hanataro's zanpakuto plunged down directly into one of Ichigo's injuries.

Ichigo yelped before he blinked in confusion. Red smoke was emitting out his wounds and flowing up as the measurer on Hisagomaru rose till it filled to the max. "T-thank you Kurosaki-san."

Urahara winced at the obvious strain on Hanataro's face as he fought back the urge to turn his zanpakuto to shikai. "Come on Hanataro, let's head down to the training grounds."

Ichigo grunted as he pushed himself up, wounds missing from his body but he was still tired. "I wanna see his shikai, it seems interesting."

"Okay!" Urahara grinned, dashing off in a direction. "To the training grounds!"

Hanataro followed quickly, still strained with his urge for shikai as he basically jumped down the entire ladder, face planted, before Hisagomaru's measure glowed brighter as the zanpakuto healed Hanataro's broken nose, cracked rib, and multiple bruises.

Ichigo was a half-step behind, laughing as he hoisted Hanataro up from the dirt. Shunpoing, the strawberry set the small healer down. "Alright, do your shikai."

Urahara watched as the timid boy breathed in, before saying his shikai command. "Mitase, Hisagomaru!"

Raising an eyebrow, Ichigo watched as the zanpakuto transformed into a small medical scalpel, the measure on the small handle, still glowing a furious red. 

"What damage is that small thing going to do?" Ichigo grumbled, not knowing he was going to eat his words.

Hanataro took a small breath before he quickly lashed out with the small tool, his face concentrating. "Akiero!"

The blade glowed a flashing red, before a large red spread out energy beam sliced its way through the landscape, the ground opening to a ravine as the beam tore through the earth.

Dust sprayed up as Ichigo snapped out of his shock before running over next to Hanataro. "Stealing my Getsuga Tensho huh?"

Even though basically no emotion showed up on Hanataro's face, he still looked offended. "I'll l-let you know that you're a-attack is a rip-off of mine. I-I died s-seventy years ago and got m-my shikai at age forty-nine."

"Even so your attack is a lot more powerful than my regular one at the current moment.*" Ichigo's brows furred more than his usual furrow before they slightly relaxed. "It's probably because yours needs a bigger energy source than mine, taking yours from wounds and mine from my reiatsu."

Hanataro nodded, as his shikai began to change back into the previous sword it was. "Y-yeah, and your attack... your attack is a lot easier t-to use than mine."

Urahara finished studying the new ravine in his training ground and practically skipped over to Hanataro. "Oh, how fascinating, healing wounds and releasing a cero-like ray, that's a very special zanpakuto you've got."

"H-Hisagomaru is very-"


"-Unique, but it takes quite a bit for his meter to charge up all the way, and I can't, uh, I can't attack until it turns into Shikai. U-Unfortunately, I can't force activate it."

"Come on Hanataro!"

Urahara stared at Hanataro before he smiled. "Alright then, I'll have Yoruichi teach you some Hakuda and Tessai help you with some Kido, do you know how to shunpo?"

Hanataro waved his hands in front of his face. "Y-You don't have to do that, uh, and n-no I can't do shunpo."

"No wonder I had to carry you, you didn't even know how." Ichigo plonked a hand onto Hanataro's head. "What kind of mission in England?"

"U-uh, gathering information." Hanataro twidled his fingers. "U-Urahara-san, you don't need to do so much for me, y-you are already supplying me with a-a gigai and housing."

Urahara hummed, tucking his fan away. "Let's us know more about the wizarding world, seems interesting."

"Wait,  wizards?"

"A-also, who is Yoruichi and T-Tessai?"


"What the hell? Kid, are you sure you haven't learned shunpo before?"

"Y-y-yes, h-how do I stop?"

"Oh kami kid, get back hERE! STOP SUPPLYING REIATSU!"




"More power on your chant."

"O-Okay Tessai-san."


"S-Son of a bitch."

"Woah there Hanataro, watch your fucking language."

"S-shut up Kurosaki-san, t-that hurt."

"Well, of course it did you basically stabbed yourself."

"Y-you shut it too Urahara-san."


"To England!"

"I-is this sekimon illegal?"

"For once, no!"


"H-how did you m-make this underground cavern?"

"If I told you, I would have to kill you."

"Okay, U-Urahara-san."


"W-what about your kids if T-tessai-san is here?"

"They're not my kids, and Tessai takes a sekimon back and forth every two weeks to come say hi and take stock."

"I-is his sekimon illegal?"



"What happened today kid?"

"The notebook on the k-kids desk in front of, uh, me started flying."

"Was it you or the kid in front of you?"





"What are t-those?"

"Well, you see-"


"I-is that an-"

"Yup, I'm giving you a kunai pouch, you need to be able to defend your self kid, here, I'll start you on the basics."




"Apply more reiatsu."



Hanataro blinked at the cat standing in front of the Urahara England Shop, pausing to give it a soft scratch behind the ear before walking into the shop. Heading to the second floor, the short boy nudged off his shoes, walking into the kitchen. Wordlessly, Tessai removed the seal from Hanataro's wrist, said shinigami barely blinking when a sudden rush of reiatsu filled him.

Hanataro focused outside, standing still for a minute as he used his reiatsu sensing skills. 'Human reiatsu' Hisagomaru murmured from his mindscape, Hanataro nodded as he drew back his sensing ability. 

Hurrying down the hallway, the short boy stumbled into an office. "U-Urahara-san, they, uh, they're here."

"Oh, Hanataro, give me a minute here I'm trying to make sure this won't blow up."

Glancing at what Urahara was doing, Hanataro sighed. "Y-you're doing paperwork Urahara-san."

"Exactly!" The blond man stood up from the desk, making his way toward the stairs. "You said they're here?"

"Y-yes, there's a cat outside that has traces of human reiatsu." Hanataro hurried after Urahara, narrowly avoiding tripping on the edge of a carpet.

"We've been training you for a year now and you still haven't been able to get rid of your clumsiness and stutter." Urahara sighed. "Now, places everyone! They're here!"

Yoruichi nodded from her place on the counter, transforming into a black cat leaving Tessai to quickly pick up the clothes left behind. Hanataro tucked away visible weapons laying around before dropping Hisagomaru in the umbrella holder. Tessai waved goodbye as he headed through an illegal sekimon and Urahara shoved away stray lab equipment and scrolls.

Hanataro then moved downstairs picking up a brush giving Urahara's mod soul in a gigai a signal as it nodded before moving upstairs and giving Urahara the gigai.

Said man spun into the sliding chair and began to man the counter as a few customers paid. Hanataro moved around the shop picking up dropped candies as well as sweeping the dust away. Just about the shop was due to close, with no other customers shopping for sweets. Urahara and Hanataro felt the witch approach.

The door opened as the witch slipped inside, before heading straight to the counter. Urahara fake read a magazine, glancing up at the woman when she stood in front of him. "Welcome to the Urahara shop, are you in need of service?"

She stiffly glanced around before focusing upon where she could see Hanataro sweeping the floor. "You are Yamada Hanataro's guardian correct?"

Urahara set down the magazine before he leaned forward. "Yes I am, what to it?"

"I would to speak to you about his... strange abilities."

Urahara smiled flippantly. "Oh, you mean like the time he made a book fly? Or that time he blew up the garbage can by throwing away a cup of ramen?"

The woman looked startled before she nodded. "Yes, abilities like that."

Urahara stood up, walking around the counter. "All right, give a moment to lock the doors and we can go upstairs and talk. Hanataro?"

Hanataro poked his head from an aisle, broom still held in his hand. "Y-yes?"

"Put away the supplies and get upstairs, we've got a guest!"



"So you're telling me..." Urahara leaned forward, fake surprise on his face. "That magic is real?"

"Yes, would you like a demonstration?" The Witch- who introduced herself as Professor McGonagall pulled a stick out of her pocket.

Urahara nodded, (fake) disbelief still in his eyes. McGonagall smoothly waved her wand, and the table turned into a cow.

"O-oh, it's a cow." Even though Hanataro knew about the wizarding world, he stared at the cow standing in the middle of their dining room. "C-could you please put the t-table back?"

"Of course." The Professor nodded, waving her wand again and turning the cow back into a table. Urahara still stared at the table, muttering under his breathe with a strange wonder.

"Tomorrow when the clock reaches noon, another professor will come to pick you up for shopping at the Diagon Alley, the wizarding area to shop. You are to get every item upon your list," McGonagall gestured at the letter Hanataro was holding. "You will be able to transfer your money from what currency you have into the money of the wizarding group. The professor coming to pick you up will explain more."

Mcgonagall stood up, Urahara a second behind. "Hopefully we will be seeing Mr. Hanataro at our school."

Then she vanished with a faint crack.


*bekon means bacon, I called a guy bacon

*after Aizen kills all the other central 46, so new people. Still assholes.