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Rooming Assignments

Chapter Text

The dim light cast an eerie glow over the hallway, softly illuminating the suspicious activities of Chaldea’s only master. Gudao finished affixing a sheet of paper to the walls, her eyes darting around anxiously. Stepping back, the girl admired her work with a sinister pride. Throwing back her head, she let out a diabolical laugh which filled the hallways. The sleeping servants all pulled their blankets tighter around them as they felt a shiver go down their spines.


Rooming Assignments.

Please find affixed below a list of new rooms and their inhabitants. All rooming assignments are final. Complaints may be filed, but will be ignored. Any servants attempting to dodge the assignments will be forced into acceptance with a command spell. Have a nice day.


Twitch. Gorgon was angry. Incredibly angry. Twitch. Rooming assignments? And with that girl? Twitch. She would kill master when she found her. Twitch. And that twitching sound? How dare Master! Twitch. Wait.

Gorgon turned around, actually feeling a little frightened. What was that noise? At first she couldn’t see anything but as her gaze drifted lower, Gorgon saw a small girl sitting on the ground, shaking in excitement. Gorgon could feel a headache coming on.

“Greetings roomate! I look forward to beginning our cohabitation!” Chiyome was ecstatic, her eyes shining with excitement. “I shall be in your care!”

“Listen you,” Gorgon said with a sigh, “I have no intention of sharing a room with you. I will discuss with Master and regain my solitary rooming status.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Chiyome paused, looking confused. “Does not the sheet say that all decisions are final?”

Damn. Gorgon had forgotten that. “I know what the stupid paper says,” Gorgon snarled. “Besides do you really want to room with me?” Gorgon attempted to appeal to the girl. “What do we possibly have in common?”

“Snakes!” Chiyome practically yelled. “We both have a relation to snakes. I’ve been wanting to discuss your experience with your curse!”

Gorgon was quite taken aback. Needless to say, she had not expected anything the girl had just said. Still she was quite angry. Bringing her face right next to the tiny girl”s, Gorgon growled at the assassin. “Little girl do you think you know what pain has been brought against me because of this form? You think you can understand me? I’m am a monster who would sooner eat you than befriend you. A beast without any beauty. A creature that no one loves, who is reviled everywhere they go. You are just a poor girl with a curse. Don’t mess with me.”

Chiyome stared at Gorgon. Her eyes were bewildered.

“But Miss Gorgon is plenty beautiful.”

Gorgon retreated backwards quickly, flustered at the sudden compliment “W-what do you mean? I’m not beautiful.” But it was too late. The girl was already halfway down the hallway, beckoning Gorgon to follow her.

“Come on roomate. Let us find our new room!”

Gorgon hesitantly followed. She didn’t like this girl, and she would certainly not stay her roomate for long. Maybe for now, though, it would be fine to humor her.


After Story:
Gorgon slowly opened her eyes and gazed around the room. Feeling something pressed against her side, Gorgon found Chiyome snuggled up against her giant body. Reaching out a finger, the avenger gently nudged the girl.

“Good morning.” She whispered tenderly.

“Good morning Miss Gorgon!” Chiyome enthusiastically replied.

Gorgon’s eyes widened. This sneaky girl had been awake! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

“Who’d greet someone like you!” Gorgon quickly turned away and flipped Chiyome off her side. Chiyome sat on the floor and rubbed her head as she looked up at the embarrassed avenger with a smile. Looking at the girl from the corner of her eye, Gorgon felt the corner of her lips begin to twitch upwards.

Chapter Text

Wisps of black covered Okita’s vision. Blinking away the fog of the early morning, the saber turned her head to look at the girl beside her. As always Nobunaga had spread her entire body over the bed, expanding to fill the entire space. Okita smiled. The archer was ridiculous as always.

Initially, Okita had been distraught to find Nobunaga at Chaldea. The saber had taken steps to avoid Nobu, dashing away every time the girl came within even ten feet of Okita. It was hard to deal with old wounds.

Nobunaga had persisted though. Many days were spent with the saber running wildly through the hallways with the archer in hot pursuit. Their vicious yells echoed across the rooms, remnants of a conversation buried somewhere in the insults. In this odd way, the two ended up spending a lot of time together, deepening their relationship.

Of course, Okita was too scared to talk face to face with Nobunaga. The girl she had loved was gone. Though she did not doubt that the archer had some blurry memory of their past, she was frightened. Frightened that she would be forced to recognize that the time they had together was gone, only a memory. Frightened that every tender moment they shared was gone. Frightened that when Nobu met her again, the archer wouldn’t like her.

So she kept running.

But Master was perceptive and meddling. So Okita and Nobunaga had ended up sharing a room. On moving day, Okita stood in the doorway, a sense of dread looming inside her. Okita’s hand continuously moved to the door, preparing to knock. Trembling, she would reach forward, and, trembling, her hand fell back to her side, never achieving its goal.

This continued a while. Reach, drop. Reach, drop. Sighing Okita stared at the ceiling. She had known it was impossible.

“How long are you going to stand there?”

The door fell open. Nobu stood in the doorframe, looking intently at Okita. The saber found herself caught up in that gaze. She realized that the last time she had looked at Nobu, the archer had been dying in her arms.

Nobunaga and Okita stood staring at each other for a long time. Finally, Nobu reached her hand out to Okita.

“I am Oda Nobunaga, the Demon King of the Sixth Heaven.”

Hesitantly, Okita took the girl’s hand.

“Okita Souji, captain of the Shinsengumi’s first unit.”

Nobu’s face lit up with her trademark smile. “Nice to meet you officially!”

In that moment, Okita lost all her reservations, all her fear. She simply basked in that smile from so long ago. Back in the present, Okita looked at the dozing girl and offered a small prayer of thanks to that perverted master. She had really missed this. Crawling over to Nobu’s sprawling form, Okita snuggled up to the sleeping servant. Nobunaga groaned as she woke up, turning her head to look at the saber latched on her side with a tiny smile.

“Good morning Okita.”

Chapter Text

The berserker sat on the edge of her bed, humming as she swung her feet back and forth. With careful attention, Frankenstein watched various objects fly back and forth across the room. Sherlock and Moriarty were fighting yet again.

“What do you mean ‘Watson could have written The Dynamics of an Asteroid?’ You bastard, that bumbling buffoon couldn’t think his way out of a paper bag!” Moriarty cursed as he threw a lamp at the ruler.

“I’ll thank you not to insult my assistant,” Sherlock said as he sidestepped the lamp. “All I meant was that your ideas are presented with the apparent intellect of a three year old child.”

“I’ll show you the intellect of a three year old!”

Objects continued to fly across the room. Fran frowned. She was pretty sure her flower vase had been somewhere in that onslaught. It seemed she would need to grab more flowers. Standing up, she attempted to alert her fathers to her departure with a grunt, but they were too caught up in their fighting to notice.

Frankenstein stepped into the hallway, intent on ray shifting to France for a flower picking expedition. To her surprise, however, she found Mordred sitting in the hallway.


Mordred glanced up to Frankenstein and smiled. “Hey. Your parents flirting again?”

“Uuu, uu.”

Mordred laughed. “So your going after flowers then. Let me come along.”

“Uhh, uh?”

“No, mom and dad are cleaning.” Mordred gestured to her room as she said this. “They look like they’re having fun, so I don’t want to disturb them.”

Frankenstein looked towards the room. Through a crack in the door she could indeed see Nightingale and Arturia cleaning the room. The berserker seemed to be lecturing the lancer on the proper usage of some cleaning product. The entire room emanated a lovey dovey aura.

“Shall we be off then?” Mordred picked herself up off the bench and proffered a hand to Frankenstein.

“Uuuu.” Frankenstein grunted as she took the outstretched hand. Together the two servants walked off to find Romani and force him to send them to France. Frankenstein hummed as they walked off.

Chapter Text

“What’s going on?” Gudao asked Mash. They were standing at a corner, cautiously peeking around. In the hallway stood Carmilla, an aura of death radiating off of her.

“I think she found your rooming assignments.” Mash whispered to the red-headed girl.


The girls continued to watch, shaking slightly as the temperature around them continued to drop.

Carmilla focused intently on the list of names. This was the rumored list, an item that had already caused much grief as servants were torn from their peaceful solitude and forced to live with, of all things, a roomate. Carmilla shuddered at the thought.

Tracing her long nail down the list, she located her name. Room 342. Not bad. Near the cafeteria. Could get a little loud around meals, but the convenience would likely outweigh that minor nuisance. Overall, the assassin was quite happy with the room. Now about the roomate…

Hijikata Toshizou. Carmilla frowned for a moment. Wasn’t that the new Berserker? Master had already assigned him a room? And weren’t the genders supposed to be seperated? The aura of death around Carmilla intensified.

“Hello master.” A low voice sounded out followed by two high pitched squeaks.

“H-h-hijikata! You scared us!”

“My apologies Master. I came to see who my roommate was.”

Gudao pointed with a shaking finger at the vampire who had by this point generated enough deathly energy around her to kill a small horse. “She’s right there.”

Hijikata looked over to where the girl was pointing. Walking over, the berserker stopped by the vampire and crossed his arms. Carmilla turned towards him, a glare plastered on her face.

“Are you the queen of torture?” Hijikata’s query was greeted with silence. “Interesting. I am confident with my skills in interrogation too. Shall we compare techniques?” Carmilla looked away, fully intent on ignoring the man. “Hm, but you, you are a very fine woman.”

“How unpleasant.” Carmilla scoffed. “Your torture is merely your occupation, you'd best not think me the same. If it weren't for your daringness, your atrociousness, I'd be treading all over you.” Carmilla turned around and began to leave, throwing a final insult over her shoulder. “In the first place, you've got far too little meat on your bones. Are you sure you're not taking your simple diet too far? Toshizou?”

With that, the assassin left, leaving behind the assassin and mocking laughter. Hijikata chuckled as he watched the vampire’s retreating form, eventually stepping forward and following her. This was going to be interesting.

Chapter Text

Gudao led the three girls down the hallway. Jeanne, Jack, and Nursery Rhyme followed behind the girl, their eyes glowing with excitement.

“Now girls,” Gudao paused in their advance, “Due to your excessive pleading, I’m going to give you your own room.” The trio cheered in unison. “But,” the redhead continued, “I am going to leave you with caretakers.” A small smirk passed over Gudao’s face as she watched the excitement disappear from the girl’s faces. Crouching down she ruffled Jeanne’s hair. “Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll like your new ‘parents.’”

“Master, you wanted to see me.” A voice came from behind the group. Standing up, Gudao discovered Blavatsky had arrived.

“Oh! Blavatsky. I want you to me-”

“Mommy!” Jack launched herself at Blavatsky. “Look Nursery, someone motherly!”

Helena deftly caught the flying assassin. “Now, now.” she chided, “Is that anyway to greet someone?” Placing the child down, she looked at the small trio in front of her as Gudao slowly retreated. “Can you tell me all your names?”

“I’m Jack!”

“I’m Nursery!”

“I-I’m Jeanne!”

“And I’m Helena Blavatsky.” A pause. “Well then you three, why don’t we go find our room. I heard we are right next to the cafeteria.”

“Yeah!” The three cried in unison. Moving together, they grabbed Blavatsky’s hand, practically dragging the caster towards their destination.


Altera stood alone in the room. Master had told her to come here, as it was to be her new room. Supposedly she was also to meet her new roommates, but no one was here. Perhaps they had decided to room elsewhere…

The door burst open and three shadows barrelled in. Altera retreated quickly, taken off guard by the sudden entrance.

“Yay, our new room!”

“The bed’s are so fluffy!”

“And bouncy!”

A fourth shadow walked into the room and looked around. Placing its hands on its hips, it began scolding the other three shadows.

“Come now, don’t try to destroy our room the moment we get here.”

“Yes mommy!” Three tiny voices cried out, and the noises of bouncing slowly stopped.

Helena smiled. These little girls had very quickly taken to calling her mommy. She quite liked that. Taking inventory of the room again, she noticed something she hadn’t the first time. A silver haired girl who looked like she was trying very hard to make herself disappear. This must be the other caretaker that master had mentioned.

The caster walked over and extended her hand towards the girl.

“Hello there. I’m Helena Blavatsky. I’m looking forward to taking care of these children with you.”

Altera looked at the strange, small girl, trepidation in her eyes. The sound of children playing could be heard as the two stood staring in silence at each other. Slowly, Altera reached out and took the proffered hand.

“I am Altera. I will be in your care.”

Chapter Text

Emiya’s face was a horrifying shade of black.

“Come along children! Today we will be moving in to our new room!” Irisviel cheerfully hummed, her arm linked with Kiritsugu’s. She exuded a ray of pure happiness everywhere she turned her head. Emiya felt like he wanted to puke.

Why had Master done this? It wasn’t that Shirou particularly didn’t want to see his family, just that after all this time he was a bit thrown off by their presence. How many years had it been since he’d seen any of them?

“Big bro, are you okay?” Ilya tugged on Emiya’s coat as she spoke, her eyes looking in concern up at her brother.

“Yeah, he’s fine.” Kuro’s crashed in between the two. Turning her face towards the red archer, she flashed him a cheeky smile. “Just a little uncertain.”

“W-why would he be uncertain?”

“Just is. Come on Ilya, I’ll race you there.”

“Whaaa! Wait Kuro, I’m not done talking to you!” The two girls ran down the hallway, dashing past their parents and into the room.


For once in his life, Emiya was feeling incredibly nervous about his cooking. Today he was to cook for his family, a celebration of their new room. This would be the first time he would have do so in many years. The archer felt himself shivering. Steeling himself, Emiya began his preparations.

As he prepared the meal, Emiya could hear the sound of laughing from the next room. Unknowingly he started to work a bit quicker, with a tiny smile on his face.


Nervously, Emiya placed the dishes down in front of each member of his family, before quickly retreating to the side. The sounds of laughter died down as he did this, each of the four servants looking down at their plate in front of them. Their silence made Emiya nervous.

“Why are you standing there? Come eat.”

Emiya was taken aback. This was his family not a group of strangers. Why should he hold himself back? Shaking his head, he sat down with his full family to eat their first dinner together.

Chapter Text

Water slid down Alter’s skin, bringing a soothing sensation with it. Jeanne was taking a shower after a long day of farming for octuplet crystals and assisting other, friendly Chaldeas. She was fully exhausted.

Sighing, Jeanne let herself relax, all the tension she had built up in the day flowed out of her. Her muscles relaxed, the heat of the water and the massaging motion on her shoulders pulling her down deeper into contentment.

“That’s right,” Ruler lulled as she continued her massage. “Just let all of it out”

Alter screamed.


Ruler was seated on the ground, looking repentant in front of the furious Alter. The avenger was fuming as she strode back and forth in anger. All in all, the scene was quite amusing.

“What were you doing?!”

“You looked so tense and strung up in the shower, I just thought I would help.”

“Who asked you? Huh?” Alter was thoroughly fed up. It was beyond her why Master had decided to room the two together. They were simply incompatible.

Ruler looked a little confused. “But I always thought it would be nice to have a massage after a long day. Did you not also think that?”

Avenger paused in her pacing. Actually, now that she thought about it, that would be rather nice. But that wasn’t the point! The ruler simply had no right to be in the shower with her. Turning on her heel the avenger stalked over to her bed.

“Whatever. I’m going to sleep.” Pulling the covers over herself, Alter prepared to sleep. Not hearing any noise from Ruler, she assumed that would be the end of the matter and began succumbing to the fatigue she had built up all day.

Just as Alter was about to drift into her dreams, a mass suddenly crashed in beside her. Ruler wrapped her arms around the girl and snuggled into her, fully disgruntling the unsuspecting target.

“W-w-what are you doing?” The avenger managed to stutter out in her surprise.

“Keeping warm.”

Alter wiggled about uncomfortably for several seconds, attempting to free herself from the ruler’s iron grip. Eventually, though she found that she had no choice but to give up and accept her position as a body pillow.

Laying there, Alter felt the girl’s warmth spread through her, bringing an odd feeling of … safety? The avenger was unsure, but for now it didn’t matter. Surrendering herself, Alter fell asleep in the embrace of the ruler. Alter slept peacefully that night.

Chapter Text

Put simply, Medusa was worried. Master had separated the gorgon sisters and perhaps nothing brought more stress to the rider than the knowledge of her sister’s being out in the world without her. However when she had voiced her misgivings, Master had given her a very scary look, muttering something about rebellion and the heretic. Medusa had decided that perhaps a tactical retreat was more in her favor of her cause.

A stark, pungent noise assaulted the rider’s nose. Her nose reflexively twitched as she turned towards the source of the offensive odour. The kitchen. She should have known.

Cautiously, the rider crept towards the kitchen. Hovering in the doorframe, the girl could barely make out anything within the thick smoke. Within the shroud, two faint shadows could be seen frantically attempting to put out the fire in the oven.

“I told you you shouldn’t use the oven!”

“Well then what should I use! This kitchen only has modern appliances!”

The two continued to argue while the rider crept closer, curiosity overtaking her better senses. Apprehension built within her as she moved through the smoke, finally spotting the red archer and a strange girl dressed in white. Straining her eyes, Medusa stepped forward. Then the world exploded.


“Sorry again about that.” The girl in white pushed a plate of strange looking food towards Medusa. “Who knew that stove would react to my food that way.”

Medusa looked at the singed part of her hair and sighed. Looking down at the food she reluctantly picked up her fork and stabbed a piece of the strange meat, lifting it to her mouth. The girl across from her watched intently, eyes glistening. Medusa warily put the food to her mouth. A few seconds of tense silence passed.

“It’s not bad.” Medusa was very surprised. While the flavor was rather unrefined, the taste was quite tolerable.

Silence answered the rider from across the table. Medusa looked up, afraid she had offended the strange girl. What greeted her however was the sudden movement towards her. Reacting quickly, Medusa attempted to defend herself from what she assumed was an attack, but she was too late. She had been caught in a hug.

“Oh! I’m so glad! I wanted to make a good impression!” The girl continued to crush Medusa in a bear hug. Medusa struggled, a little alarmed at a strange beating in her chest, the creeping warmth that she had only felt from three other people.

“I’m Boudica. I’m your new roommate!”

Chapter Text

Boisterous laughter echoed through the halls. Empty silence responded, the normally vibrant halls shrouded in the dark of a 2 A.M. gloominess.

“HAHA! Truly the twentieth century is a wonderful place to have made these consoles.” The muscular man continued laughing shoveling more snacks into his mouth after failing the level for a twenty-third time.

The scrawny man beside him readjusted his glasses with a look of irritation in his eyes. “We’ve been up for almost twenty hours! Please let me rest!” A slight look of panic came over his eyes as he thought about the horrors the day held for him. Farming…

A strong hand clapped him on the back, knocking his glasses askew yet again. “Now is not the time to admit defeat! Not when we are so close to the victory which we have sought after! Come nw you are a strategist. If you cannot defeat the enemy head on, then come at them from a different way. Now, onwards!”

The scrawny man adjusted his glasses yet again. His tired eyes seemed to be filled with some kind of fighting spirit. Grumbling, he picked up the controller yet again. “You just want to pull an all nighter so you can lord it over the King of Heroes.

“It is of no matter. He is a great king, but I will demonstrate my prowess to him! HAHAHA! I’d like to see him do something like this! Now, again. Let us beat this damnable game!

“We’ll never beat it with the way that you’ve been playing! Just follow my lead like I’ve been saying!” The little man sighed, a determined look contrasting his words.

“It is the king’s duty to lead his warriors into battle!”

A final adjustment of glasses and the game continued before ending in another miserable defeat. In the morning, light touched upon a happy scene, the comfortable happiness shrouding the sleeping bodies as they dozed serenely in front of a game over screen.

Chapter Text

Curious eyes peered from behind the corner, staring at the saber who was happily enjoying her food. A furrowed brow carefully watched the movements of the oblivious saber. There was a certain confusion in those squinting eyes, a look that evinced confusion, hostility, and a strange familiarity.

Arturia sat enjoying her meal, munching happily on her meal with an unrestrained glee. Finishing her bowl, she looked around, passing over the archer’s hiding spot. Holding her bowl up, the saber gestured and shouted at Emiya, anticipation plastered all over her face.

Ishtar watched with intense curiosity. Who was this strange girl that master insisted she room with? Perhaps more important, why did she feel this strange connection within her mind? Most likely, this was a memory from her vessel, some feeling or link that the goddess could never know. Whatever the reason, Ishtar did not like the uneasy beating in her heart. It made her nervous.

Emiya served the impatient saber, shoveling more of the day’s lunch into the girl’s bowl. The two servants talked and laughed their actions familiar and comfortable. Though Ishtar could not hear their conversation, she felt a longing in her chest, an image of an unfamiliar room, of unfamiliar faces flashing briefly in her mind, before fading back into black.

Ishtar grimaced, a glimpse of anger on her face. A goddess should not have such sentimentalities in her spirit origin. She would have to find a way to deal with these … “feelings.” Tearing herself away from the simple scene in front of her, the goddess began to walk away, one terrible thought in her mind. She was going to avoid contact with this servant at all costs.

The archer’s mind commanded an unwilling body to move forward and away. One step, two steps. A crash. A very loud crash. The kind that meant something bad had happened. Ishtar stopped herself. There was no need for concern. The other party was a servant, if anything they should all be concerned about the flo …

Light feet carried the archer across the floor.

“Are you alright? Does it hurt anywhere? Should I get a doctor?” The flurry of questions bombarded the saber as gentle hands helped raise her head from the floor. Casting her eyes about Arturia found her food bowl with most of its food still in it. It looked … edible. Good. Looking up at her helper’s face a flash of recognition echoed in her spirit origin, something primal the saber that everything was alright.

“No. I’m fine.” A pause. “What did you say your name was?”


Chapter Text

“Take that!” Suzuka Gozen lunged forward, deftly deflecting an attack to her flank, readjusting her attack to nip at an exposed opening in Ushiwakamaru’s defense.

“Ack! Well then how about this!” The rider maneuvered in through the iron defensive wall and successfully took out a bishop. The game of chess was getting quite intense.

Watching on from the side, Mash giggled a little. It was entertaining to see the two very differing servants get along so well. Especially after their less than stellar meeting. Chaldea had shook with the aura of discontent that had been released. Needless to say, there was a lot of concern over the relationship that would develop. Now, however, everything seemed fine, rather oddly. Mash shook her head, clearing her thoughts. That was not what she was supposed to be doing now. Turning around she went to find Da Vinci.

The two japanese servants had come to a heated stalemate. They could do nothing but glare at each other and move their respective kings around the board.

“Arrggh!” Suzuka threw up her hands in frustration and collapsed back into her chair. There was a slight pause, hanging comfortably in the space between words. The saber turned her head to look at the rider from the corner of her eyes. “Wanna go another round?”

Eyeing up the opponent before her, Ushiwakamaru gave a slight chuckle. “No. Today I must admit that I am not your better.”

“Running away then. Lol that’s pathetic.”

“W-w-what! Who said anything about running away. Come set up the pieces! I’ll show you running away!”

The fox smiled, drawing a rather irked glance from the opposing strategist.

“What are you smirking for?! Get over here!”

“Eek! No don’t pet my ears, I just did my hair! It took me so long!”

“Yeah!, so long! In our shared restroom!”

Happy sounds of play fighting sounded through the courtyard. Everything was peaceful.

Chapter Text

The chaos was frightening. Truly, Master's assignments had given Chaldea a test greater than anything before it, bringing disorder and great anger upon the staff. However, as days were on the great reckoning that seemed imminent somehow did not come to pass. Mash was duly confused.

As for her own rooming assignment Mash was completely fine with the decision. The young girl quite enjoyed spending time with senpai, as strange as the other girl was. However, Mash had seen the great initial empty that all the servants had had. Where had all the hate and discontent gone? Perhaps she should ask senpai...

"Well that's a very simple answer." Mash listened attentively as senpai began her lecture. "They never actively opposed the rooming in the first place."

"But didn't they..." Mash trailed off as her mind began to connect the dots. No one had come to see any of Chaldea's staff about changing rooms. The most any had done was complain about their roommates, but not in an angry, destructive way. They were complaining as they would about an old friend.

Gudao smiled. Stretching her arms out, she gestured towards Mash, beckoning the shielder towards her. "The servants, as powerful and heroic as they may be, are just ghosts with regrets. No one, human or otherwise, would ever reject anything that helps bring them happiness. They may push and kick, desperately trying to get away, but deep down they will accept it. They can't help it. Do you understand?"

Gudao looked at the purple haired girl in her arms who had a slightly perplexed look on her face. After a short pause, the girl nodded. "Yes, I think I do." Gudao sighed. She wasn't entirely sure Mash understood, but she could see the demi-servant was trying very hard. Leaning over, she placed a gentle kiss on the shielder's forehead.

"Do you want to get lunch?"