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(Not A) Disaster Date

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"This is a disaster."

Maria glared at the sad remains of skeleton. She was pretty sure all the meat had burned to a crisp.

She couldn't even order pizza because Sif was going to be here any minute. This was going to be the saddest date in history. The fish was coal, she looked like shit with mission-grime stuck to every inch of her and her apartment looked like someone had ransacked it. "An unmitigated disaster." She'd just started scraping the fish into the trash when the door banged open.

"Hello, my love! I am..."

Sif trailed off, taking in the state of Maria and her apartment.


Maria mustered a smile.


Sif looked perfect, of course. She even had flowers in her hair.

"It has been a bad day?"

Maria nodded tiredly.

"Yeah. And I forgot to take the fish out of the oven. I'm lucky the whole building didn't burn down. So there' food."

Maria winced. A hungry Sif was never fun. But to her surprise, Sif only smiled placidly.

"Then it is a good thing that I learned of your mission. I brought you fresh clothes. We shall eat at a restaurant."

Maria blinked in surprise.

"Coulson called me."

"Oh. Can... can I shower before we go?"

Sif sat down on the sofa.

"Of course. I shall wait and tidy up a little. We have time."

Two hours later, sat in the restaurant with plenty of food before her and clad in Asgards finest fabrics, Maria decided she was the luckiest woman on Earth.
Her date wasn't a disaster, her girlfriend looked as edible as the food and the night was still young.

Sif took her hand, smiling.

"What are you thinking?"

"That I'm very lucky. And that I should send Coulson a gift basket."