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A Beautiful Mess

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This late at night, there was really only one person that would be calling on Cesar. If the hour hadn't given it away, the look on the servant's face certainly would have been sufficient.
"I'll go down, " he said, relieving the man of his lamp and responsibilities after tossing on a robe.

Sendhel hadn't actually been admitted to the house yet, so Cesar escorted him in to the parlour and helped him to sit on the low divan. He needed the help – he was drunk, high, or both, clearly coming from some kind of 'entertainment'.

"My hero," he murmured against Cesar's neck, draping himself dramatically over his shoulders. It wasn't all drama, though, as whatever he'd taken had left him weak as a kitten. Or maybe it as something else. Looking him over more carefully, Cesar could see that his eyes were completely dilated even with the lamp turned all the way up. Despite the spots of violet burning on his cheeks, he was pale and ashy looking.

"Are you okay?"

"Sweet of you to be concerned, darling." Sendhel raised a cold and shaking hand to Cesar's face, and he smiled. "I'm so very, very fine."

"You're not fine, Sen. You can barely stand. What happened?"

"Mmm, yes, maybe I am feeling a spot listless…that's why I came to find the most invigorating person I could think of. That's you…my darling Cesar."

It wasn't unbelievable, maybe, but certainly not the whole truth. He took Sen's hand from where it had slipped down to caress his chest. His wrist was red from having been bound, which was usually a sign that he'd been providing, rather than just enjoying, the entertainment at whatever party or private event he'd come from. It wouldn't be the only mark… but Sendhel was used to that sort of thing, and it didn't usually leave him quite so enervated. He didn't used to get high, or drunk, either, especially not when he was 'working', but a lot of things had changed once he'd started 'working' for the ambassador from Llorfir.

"I don't know about invigorating, but I'll take care of you. Did you take something I should know about?"

"Oh my dearest… I'm the thing that's meant to be taken." He smiled again, sultry and alluring despite his pallor. "I've caught a little chill that's all – would you warm me up?"

"…Let's get you up to bed." Cesar scooped him up, finding him distressingly light. The Sendhel he knew was stronger, and tougher, than he looked. He had to be. Now, he leaned his head against Cesar's shoulder and wrapped his arms around his neck, content to be carried.

"And will the master of the house be joining us, darling?"

Cesar hesitated. He hadn't been sure Sendhel had known about him and Kalman… that was still new, and confusing, and things with Sendhel had taken their own strange and confusing turn, so that he was not really sure what was happening in his life. He cared for both of them, and even though no one had ever implied that he couldn't have both, he still felt guilty. He shook his head. "I'm going to have my hands full just looking after you." Hopefully that would be enough to get him to drop the subject for now.

It seemed to suffice, and Cesar made his way back through the dark house. Sen's mouth on his skin was distracting, but he navigated through the dark house despite abandoning his lamp. Sendhel didn't let him easily disentangle himself when he tried to settle him on the bed, curing his fingers into Cesar's sleep tousled hair, and kissing him hungrily. It was hard to pull back, to remind himself that this was a distraction, and that Sen had other needs. He gave in to one more kiss before retreating to his nightstand and pouring a tall glass of water from the pitcher.

Sendhel made a face when Cesar pushed it at him. "I'd rather something stronger, darling. How about some wine, at least, to thicken it up?"

"How about you drink it, and you can tell me about your evening?"

Sen shrugged, pulling a face before taking a long drink from the glass. Definitely thirsty, and likely dehydrated along with…whatever else. When he'd drained half of it, he shoved it back towards Cesar, threatening to spill the rest across the sheets.

"There's not too much to say, darling. Loik asked me to entertain some relative of Coramance, or his… maybe both, and his new fiancée. How could I turn down the honour of such delights? I hardly could… and as it turns out, neither could they."

Lord Loik Talav'era was not someone Cesar liked to hear Sendhel was spending his time with. But it was also true that he could hardly have refused. And he'd heard rumours about some of Coramance's younger relations…

"You look upset, darling, but don't be. It was an exquisite time." He smiled, teasing his fingers along his neck, prominently framed in the high-collared vest of dark violet satin straps. "They said I was the most delicious morsel they'd ever been served… and so well seasoned."

"Did they hurt you?" Cesar had sat back down on the bed, and now Sen lay his head in his lap.

"You're always so sweet, my Cesar. It was just a party…. Though you're welcome to conduct a thorough inventory of my person." He ran his hands down his chest, showing off the jewelled wires that ran between the studs in his chest, the fine chain encircling his waist. The fabric of his long pewter skirt was stiff, but not stiff enough to conceal his erection, which was probably exactly the point.

Cesar traced the marks on his wrists with a finger, but it was a dark spot on the collar of the vest that made him frown. It looked like blood, and though there was no corresponding wound, it was still concerning. Sendhel looked so uncharacteristically fragile - could one party really account for all he was seeing? Maybe he hadn't had to be there at all – maybe he'd wanted to.

"What is my assessment is…that you're too vulnerable for me to take advantage of right now?"

"Too vulnerable?" Sen stretched, reaching back to caress Cesar's shoulders, and slipping his hands inside his robe to encircle his waist. "That's the perfect time for taking advantage, darling." He licked his lips, rolling onto his stomach. "You could make me do anything you wanted."

Cesar sighed. It was hard not to be affected by Sendhel. In fact, it was impossible to ignore – he was getting hard. But he had to at least try. "Okay… What if what I want is for you to take care of yourself. To rest, eat properly, keep off the drugs…"

"Hmmph. That sound utterly dull. But I don't think that's what all of you wants." He snaked a hand around Cesar's cock, and it stiffened fully at his touch. "Please, darling. I need you."

Cesar stifled a moan, and wrapped his hand around Senhel's to keep him still. "Will you stay with me?"

He didn't know what Sendhel really needed, but it was more than just sex. Something had driven him here tonight, out of all the places he could have gone. He'd come to him…. Wanted him. And if he stayed beyond the night, maybe he'd have a chance to really help. To take care of him properly, and find out what was really going on. Was it such a bad deal, to trade that chance for the sex Sen wanted now?

"I'll stay," he murmured, kissing Cesar's stomach, mouth working down to join his hand.

It was a tenuous agreement – no terms set. But Sendhel was licking his cock, the bar that ran through his tongue pressing against his head. And he did want it – wanted to be inside him, to pull him into his arms and hold him against him while he fucked him, and to believe that this, that he, was exactly what Sen needed.

Fucking Sendhel was often an adventure, exploring and expanding his sexual limits. He was the first man Cesar had ever fucked – his first for so many things. But that wasn't what either of them wanted right now. Cesar did pull Sendhel into his arms and kissed him deeply. He'd expect to find him well fucked, loose and ready, and was surprised to find as he cast off his skirt that wasn't the case. The straps of violet satin continues below his waits and hooked into his sheer stockings. His ass and cock were easily accessible, but no one had been there before him tonight. Their loss – it was an incredible sight.

Sen begged him to keep going, and Cesar pushed his thick cock into his ass, tight and hot and perfect. Just what he wanted, despite himself. Just what Sendhel wanted, despite them both. He didn't have the energy to be a vigorous participant, but held himself just above Cesar's lap, arms around his neck, giving him ample room to thrust. And thrust he did, burying himself deep and fast, over and over.

Cesar realized he'd closed his eyes, and flicked them open. The sight he caught stole his breath – just for a second, all of Sendhel's vulnerable need, all of his honest affection, trained on him. And then it was gone, replaced by a lazy smile, and a surrender to pure pleasure. But Cesar didn't want to lose him back to the façade so easily. He pulled him down against him and held him there, reaching up to brush Sen's hair out of his face.

"I love you, Sendhel," he said. "I hope you know that."

"Words, darling." He brought his hands up to cup Cesar's face. "I've heard them before. But I believe them from you."

It wasn't what he'd hoped to hear, not 'I love you too' or 'I needed that', but Sendhel's lips on his were a better answer, and he could feel all the words Sendhel couldn't say pouring into him. They were in his look, too, when he broke away, baring his neck invitingly, taking Cesar's hand down to his cock, rocking his hips gently. Cesar took all of his invitations, running his tongue along his throat, stroking his cock, thumbing its piercing, and resuming his thrusting with a growing need for release. He couldn't help himself, grazing his teeth along his neck, until Sen gasped his name. It wasn't long after that that he spilled his seed across Cesar's hand, and the tight shuddering of his ass around his cock brought Cesar to a climax in short order.

"Darling," Sendhel gasped, "I so needed that." He brought Cesar's hand to his mouth, licking him clean.

He did seem more relaxed – less agitated, though it could just be whatever drugs he'd been on wearing off. But when they finally disengaged, he let Cesar feed him another glass of water, and didn't protest when Cesar held him as he fell quickly asleep. He said he'd stay, but not for how long… Whether it was a few hours, just the night, or maybe a day or two, Cesar promised himself he would try his hardest those deeper needs, that went beyond sex and affection: to keep him safe, if only from himself.