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Mr. Stark, Are you single?

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It first started gaining media attention when Karen Page wrote an article under the New York Bulletin’s gossip column, claiming that it has been months since Tony Stark was last seen drunk out of his mind, partying all hours of the night, and parading around with some equally as drunk, beautiful girl, wearing barely any clothing.

Eight months to be exact.

Once that article was published on that grey, gloomy morning in May, more and more people began to wonder about Tony Stark's love life.

Was he focusing on privatizing his partying from the public eye?

Was he attempting to clean up his act?

Was he trying to become a better role model for young children, since obtaining his superhero status?

Were the rumors from Japanese swimsuit model Rumiko Fujikawa claiming that Tony Stark was going celibate, true?

Considering that all of his time is spent saving the world, did the billionaire finally quit his teenage antics?

Or was Tony Stark, God forbid, in a relationship?

 

Once Karen Page brought that innocent topic to light, the media couldn't get enough of it. Tony was constantly hounded by reporters, but the number one question he would be asked was, ‘Are you dating anyone?’ Tony would always laugh and smirk towards the camera and say “I'm dating America, it's my day job” or “Who has time to date? I'm too busy riding the American dream” or he’d refuse to comment.

Tony couldn't go a day without having someone ask him, “Mr. Stark, are you single?”

A few more months passed by and the media began to slow down there antics, becoming slightly less obsessed with wanting to know if Tony Stark was still single. Well, that was until Tony stark was photographed in Paris. When he returned to the United States, reporters seemed to follow him everywhere, calling after him, wanting to know if he was in the city of love with anyone special. He declined to comment.

Since then, a year and a half had passed when Tony accidentally let something slip during a press conference. When asked why Avengers tower was no longer going to be used as the Avengers headquarters, and why a facility in upstate New York was, Tony responded with: “Well, my love still considers it to be some ‘big, ugly building’ in the middle of the city.” He said with a joking voice, “And upstate New York has much prettier scenery for drawing.” After those words left his lips, Tony's eyes widened as he looked at the sea of reporters, all who had just heard what Tony had just said.

Well shit.

Since that day, the media refused to stop searching for the identity of Tony Stark's secret ‘love’.


While Tony did find the attention annoying, he sort of liked how the media was overall happy that he seemed to be in a happy, loving relationship. Although it was hard to go on dates without being followed by paparazzi. Some many times they’ve had to cancel plans instead of going out, in fear of the blinding flash of a camera.

This was definitely one of the reasons Tony was excited for the Avengers to move into the compound upstate. He yearned for the privacy it would provide. But in the meantime, he had to continue to go outside wearing a baseball hat and sunglasses, and avoid the people poking and prodding at his life. Oh well, he could wait another two weeks.

“Hey Tony,” Natasha said one morning from across the breakfast table, “look at page six.” She then proceeded to throw a folded up newspaper, across the table, towards his face. Tony closed his eyes, expecting to feel the newly printed paper slap against his skin, but instead of the impact, he felt nothing. He opened his eyes to see Steve’s arm stretched out in front of his face, holding the newspaper in his hand. “You ruin all my fun, Rogers,” Natasha muttered into her freshly buttered toast.

Tony stuck his tongue out at her before turning to page six of the Daily Bugle. He scanned the page, looking for what Natasha wanted him to see. Once he found it, Tony's roaring laugh filled the air.

Tony Stark's Mysterious One-True-Love

By: Betty Bryant
It has been over two-and-a-half years since Tony Stark was last seen partying, drinking, and sleeping around. It appears that the reason Tony Stark had officially turned his back on his infamous lifestyle, was because a special someone walked into his life and changed it forever. It was four months ago when Tony Stark accidentally revealed to the world that he was in a loving relationship. But who is the special lady that has managed to subdue the ex-avid partier? Well, a close source to the couple has come forward to help fill in some of the gaps. “Tony is the happiest he's ever been in his life.” a close friend tells us. “For so long all of those who were close to Tony never imagined that he would leave his life as a playboy behind, but this woman changed him for the better.” Stark has never announced, publicly, that he has been in any serious relationships before. However, he is linked to dozens of famous models such as Sunset Bain, Meredith McCall, Joanna Nivena, and Indries Moomji. Now the question that should be on everyone's mind is: When are we going to meet the siren who has captivated the heart of New York’s previously most eligible bachelor?

By the time Tony had finished the article, he was about to hand it back to Natasha when he noticed that Steve was reading it over his shoulder. When Steve finished, he slumped against the back of his chair and bit into a bright red apple. The crisp sound it made as Steve bit into it pierced the air. Tony stared at the way his jaw moved back and forth as he chewed the fruit, the bob of his Adam's apple as he swallowed. When he bit into it again, a small amount of juice trickled down, towards his bottom lip, only to be stopped as the tip of Steve’s wet, pink tongue reached out the stop it.

“Huh,” Steve said as he watched Tony’s eyes follow the movements of his tongue and land on his lips. “I wonder who this ‘close friend’ in the article is? Clearly, they know you so well.” His lips turned slightly upward into a little smirk that totally didn’t make Tony want to desperately bend over the table in front of him. Nope. Not at all.

“Just get a room.” Tony and Steve both jumped in their seats as they turned their attention over towards Clint, who was hunched over the table with a mouthful of cereal, rolling his eyes in Natasha’s direction. “It is too early in the morning to see you two making bedroom eyes at each other. I’m trying to eat here.” He groaned as he shoved another spoonful of Foot Loops into his mouth.


The biggest bombshell dropped during a press conference seven months later, when Tony Stark gave an official statement saying that he was engaged.

The man still refused to reveal any details about his bride to be, but that didn’t stop the people from asking. Instead of people wanting to know about the technological advancements which were being made at S.I. (even though that technically was Pepper’s jurisdiction, people still asked him), or discuss the Avengers most recent mission in Switzerland, they wanted to know about the wedding.

People online were going nuts. #IronHusband was trending on Twitter for weeks. People were creating and selling mugs, t-shirts, and other very strange wedding themed merchandise with Iron Man’s picture or of Tony Starks face, saying phrases such as: “Mr. and Mrs. Stark”.

The rest of the Avengers were also bombarded with questions revolving around the prenuptial. They would either refuse to comment or say things like, “I’m happy for them”, “No one was surprised,” or “Thank you, but they value their privacy”.

Clint Barton, after he was hounded outside a bagel shop, once turned towards a reporter, looked straight into her camera and said, “They won’t shut up about all the planning, and they both suck at making decisions. One wants hydrangeas, another wants red, white, and pink, roses. I tried to tell them that they should use gladiolus, and now they are also, somehow, debating calla lilies!” He sounded exasperated as his arms slashed through the air around him. “I’m happy for them both, truly I am, but they are driving me crazy.” He then stormed away before the reporter could ask him another question.

Clint’s rant about flowers was the most information the public received. Then a year went by without any news.

Then another.

After that, the Avengers were so busy fighting missions that they were rarely ever seen in New York City. If any of them were seen, it was a rare occasion. Tony Stark hasn’t been seen in NYC in over five months.

The people began wondering if Tony was even still engaged.

While people hoped he was, they knew that even with there incessant asking, they weren’t going to get answers any time soon. Or at least... not for another two months.

When Christine Everheart posted a picture on Twitter, of Tony Stark standing outside of a Starbucks, holding a large coffee, people’s first thought was ‘He’s back’. But in the second picture, when she zoomed in on his left hand, even though it was very blurry, everyone saw what was resting around his finger.

The world seemed to be in an uproar when they found out that the one-and-only Tony Stark was officially married. Many people were happy for him, but many were also upset that they hadn’t known. The people wanted to see a superhero wedding, after all. Tony hasn’t been seen in New York since, however, sources claim that he has been traveling back-and-forth from the Avenger’s Compound to Stark Industries for meetings, conferences, and testings.

About a month-and-a-half later is when the whole world seemed to freeze. Steve Rogers was exiting a building, about to put on his gloves, due to the bracing, fall weather, when he saw a woman get mugged on the street. A man wearing a black hood over his head pointed a gun at her as he grabbed her purse and ran. Immediately Steve rushed to her aid and stopped the hooded man before he got too far away. While doing this, he gained a lot of attention. Soon a crowd formed around the scene, dozens of people filming everything with there cell phones. Steve had been so busy trying to calm the woman down, once he returned her purse, that he hadn’t realized that he didn’t put his gloves back on. Once he made that realization, he heard a high pitched voice yell, “Look at his hand!”

Steve put his gloves on as fast as he could, but he knew people saw the silver band circled around his finger. Steve waited until the police arrived so he could give his statement, but after that, he rushed away from the scene to get to Tony. By the time he reached Stark Industries to pick up Tony before the head back to the Compound, the video of Steve fighting a mugger was already trending on Twitter. Along with several blurry photos of his ring finger.

After hiding in Avengers Compound for over a week, the pair finally agreed to verify their relationship for the world.

Tony took to Instagram and posted a series of photos including Steve’s hand adorning his engagement ring, another was of the two of them feeding each other wedding cake. The third picture was of the two of them on a boat in Greece, the one after that was the two of them eating gelato in Rome. The last picture was a selfie Tony took months ago. Steve, not knowing that the picture was being taken, was standing with his back facing the camera. The only thing he was wearing was a pair of white boxers with the words ‘Property of Tony Stark’ printed over his ass, in red. Tony’s pointer finger rested against his lips in a ‘shhh’ fashion.

He captioned the photos: Happy 6th-month anniversary, Babe. Who would have thought that we’d get discovered by you doing something righteous? Guess we owe Thor $20 bucks. #ohcaptainmycaptain #SuperHusbands

Steve posted the photo Bruce took when Tony got down on one knee and proposed. Apparently, all the Avengers knew that Tony was going to propose so they spied on the two of them while they were on vacation so they could be there to witness it. The next photo was of the two of them at the altar. Standing before each other with nothing but love in their eyes as they said ‘I Do’.

The next picture Steve took on their honeymoon. He had woken up early one morning and hopped in the shower. But when he came back into the bedroom, Tony was sprawled on his stomach across the bed, nothing but the white sheet covering his backside. Rays of sun cast into the room from the balcony. The sun had reached Tony and made his bronze skin sparkle. The highlighted strands of his hair seemed to shift in the light. Tony’s sleeping face was free of all stress and anxiety. He looked so peaceful. Steve couldn’t help but photograph it.

The next picture Nat had taken before the pair had gotten together when they were still skirting around there feelings. Steve had trouble sleeping one night so he came to the communal level of Avengers Tower to watch a movie, apparently, Tony had the same idea and was already there. Steve had made them both hot chocolate and the two talked all night. Neither remembered falling asleep, but they do remember waking up to see Natasha standing over them with a camera. Steve was laying on his back with Tony hanging onto him like a koala while Steve’s arms were securely wrapped around him. Steve still kept that photo in his wallet.

The final picture was taken after the Avengers had a mission in Tuscany. A Doombot had blasted Steve off of a building and he crashed onto the hood of a car. For a whole minute, Steve remained unresponsive. It was the first time the Avengers feared that Captain America was going to die. When Steve finally came to, with some assistance from Hawkeye, he was able to get off the car and stand up. At least he was until his back was ruffly shoved against the car and Tony had kissed him. “Don’t ever do that again.” Tony had whispered against his lips. “You can’t leave me, Rogers.” It was their first kiss. Luckily, Nat had her phone out and was able to capture the moment.

Steve captioned the pictures: Even though you make fun of me for ‘living in the past’, you are my entire future, Tony. Thank you for still loving me when I forget how to use the remote to DVR something on the TV, and when I repeatedly ask what the same keyboard shortcuts do. And hell, we’ve been together for five years and we’re not sick of each other yet. I think that’s a good sign! Happy 6-month anniversary! #It’sSteveStark-RogersNow #ilovemystarknakedhusband #clintwrotethatlasthashtag #SuperHusbands

Tony responded ‘Language’ in the comment section and the internet wouldn’t stop freaking out.

While the world now knew that Iron Man and Captain America were married, that didn’t stop the couple from hiding things from the public. After all, two years later when they adopted a little baby boy named Peter, the public didn’t find out about it for another fourteen years.

Now Tony never had to deal with another reporter asking, “Mr, Stark, are you single?”