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K/DA Chat Fuckery

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Ahri: EVERYONE I HAVE A SERIOUS EMERGENCY!!!

 

Kai’sa: What is it? 

Kai’sa: What’s wrong? 

Kai’sa: Do I need to come home right away?

 

Akali: Ahri, what’s wrong??

 

Evelynn: Did you die yet?

 

Taliyah: ^^that’s morbid…

 

Sivir: Oh, those two are worse than this

 

Taliyah: Interesting

 

Sona: Ahri, what’s the emergency?

Sona: Do I need to come over?

 

Ahri: I LOST MY EARRING!!!

 

Kai’sa: What?

 

Akali: Really, Ahri?

 

Evelynn: Oh darn, you’re not dead.

 

Taliyah: She really woke us up at 9am for this

 

Sivir: Tal, she woke us up at 3am many times

Sivir: This is nothing

 

Taliyah: Interesting.

 

Sona: Still…

Sona: She would make a huge deal on an earring

 

Ahri: YEAH BUT IT’S MY EARRING!!!!!!!

Ahri: ISH GOOOONE!!

Ahri: GOOOOOOOOONEEE

Ahri: WAAAAHHH

 

Akali: Buy another one?

 

Ahri: BUT DIS ONE IS SPECIAL

 

Evelynn: What’s so special about it?

 

Ahri: ISH MY FAVORITE EARRING IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD!!!

 

Kai’sa: Ahri, you can buy another earring similar to it

Kai’sa: Now if you don’t mind, we would like to continue our morning schedules without any incidents at the house

Kai’sa: So watch the house for us.

 

Ahri: BUT MY EARRING IS GOOOOOONE

 

Evelynn: If I buy you a new one, will you shut the fuck up?

 

Ahri: NYOOOOO

Ahri: YOU CAN’T BUY ME THIS EARRING, THIS IS SPECIAL

Ahri: EVIE THIS IS MY HEART SHAPED ONE

 

Evelynn: @everyone

Evelynn: This is actually serious

 

Kai’sa: Huh?

 

Taliyah: Evelynn siding with Ahri??

 

Sivir: I did not see this coming.

 

Sona: For Ahri to not accept Evelynn buying her things is very serious.

 

Akali: Well shit, do I have to postpone my meeting?

 

Evelynn: Yes, darling

 

Kai’sa: Wait, we’re really dropping everything for Ahri’s earring????

 

Evelynn: Yes.

 

Kai’sa: i

Kai’sa: kjdsgkjg

Kai’sa: I can’t ditch our publicity meeting???

Kai’sa: I’m suppose to represent K/DA when our team meets with some of our biggest sponsors

Kai’sa: We planned this meeting for weeks

 

Evelynn: girls, clear your plans bc this is obviously an emergency

 

Kai’sa: Alrighty then…

Kai’sa: Guess this really is an emergency 

 

Ahri: IT IIIISSSS!!

 

Akali: I woke up so early for my meeting thoooooo

 

Evelynn: I’m sorry darling but Ahri’s emergency must come first

 

Sivir: Over an earring??

 

Evelynn: Yes.

Evelynn: btw I expect you to help too

 

Sivir: Me??

 

Evelynn: Yes, you’re kai’sa gf and you are obligated to help us

 

Kai’sa: YOU DIDN’T HELP ME WITH MY DAD

 

Evelynn: Anyways, Sona, we need your help too

 

Taliyah: Wow, ignored, hahah

 

Sona: I don’t exactly have a choice, do I?

 

Ahri: MI EARRRING IS MISHING

 

Akali: YEAH WE KNOW AHRI

 

Taliyah: Where do you think you lost it last, Ahri?

 

Ahri: I don’t knooooooo

 

Kai’sa: Think.

 

Evelynn: We were busy yesterday

Evelynn: Do you think you might have lost it somewhere in our outings?

 

Ahri: MAYBE???

 

Akali: Kami...this is like finding a needle in a haystack.

 

Sona: List out where you guys went yesterday

 

Kai’sa: Are we all seriously cancelling our ACTUALLY IMPORTANT meetings for this earring??

 

Ahri: YESH

 

Evelynn: Sivir included

 

Sivir: YEAH I GET IT

 

Taliyah: HA.HA.

 

Sivir: Shut up or i’ll beat your ass

 

Taliyah: Too bad I’m all the way in egypt

 

Sona: and Xan Irelia is all the way in japan

 

Irelia: STOP USING MY FULL NAME!!!

 

Akali: hi hi

 

Irelia: Hi...

 

Evelynn: oh i forgot mophelia was in this chat

 

Irelia: I was hoping you would forget…

 

Ahri: IRELIA I LOST MY EARRING!!!

 

Irelia: Sorry to hear that

 

Ahri: ISH MY FAVORITE ONE

 

Irelia: What a shame, hope you find it.

 

Evelynn: I’m going to list the places we went to yesterday

Evelynn: *studio

Evelynn: *riot company for a few meetings

Evelynn: *interview with PopRox

Evelynn: *shopping at the mall

 

Ahri: I really hope I didn’t lose it at the mall, we had a lot of fans there

 

Kai’sa: I still say just go buy a new earring

 

Ahri: BUT YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND, ISH SPECIALLLLL

 

Akali: What is so special about your heart ring earring, ahri?

 

Ahri: It was left with me when I was a kit

 

Kai’sa: Okay, now I feel like an asshole.

Kai’sa: I’m sorry.

 

Ahri: ISH OKIIIEEEE LETS JUST FIND IT PWEASE

 

Evelynn: I’m trying, now hold your tails and calm down.

 

Ahri: I’m holding my tails and I am calm.

 

Akali: So should we split up and go to these places to check if her earring is there?

 

Evelynn: That’s the idea.

Evelynn: I’ll check the studio

Evelynn: Akali go check riot company

 

Akali: Okie

 

Evelynn: Sona go check the PopRox we went to

 

Sona: Alright

Sona: Wait, didn’t you guys already have an interview with them?

 

Akali: We’re just that popular 

 

Sona: Ha. Ha. Ha.

 

Evelynn: Kai’sa, go check the mall

 

Kai’sa: Okay 

 

Evelynn: Sivir, go do what you do best and follow your gf around for moral support.

 

Taliyah: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

Sivir: Shut up, Tal

 

Kai’sa: I miss you~

 

Sivir: I miss you too~

 

Evelynn: You’re welcome.

 

XXX

 

Akali: It’s not at the studio.

 

Ahri: WAAAAH

 

Evelynn: Are you sure you searched everywhere?

 

Ahri: DID YOU SEARCH EVERY INCH???

 

Akali: Yeah I did

Akali: It’s not here.

 

Ahri: ARE YOU SURE YOU DIDN’T JUST WALK IN, TOOK ONE GLANCE, AND WALKED OUT??????

 

Akali: Okay, fine I’ll search again

 

Ahri: AKALLLLIIIII

 

Akali: Siiiiigh I don’t wannna search

 

Evelynn: If you search thoroughly, I’ll do that thing you really like me to do~

 

Akali:

Akali: really?

 

Evelynn: Yes

 

Akali: cookies too?

 

Evelynn: Everything until the last tuck

 

Akali: Okie, I search

 

Ahri: wtf????

 

Akali: Mind your own business, I’m searching

 

Ahri: ??????

Ahri: I’m curious…

 

Evelynn: Don’t be.

 

Ahri: Wah??

 

Akali: Shhh

Akali: Just hold your tails and be patient while I search

 

Ahri: Okieeeee

 

XXX

 

Akali: Okay, the necklace isn’t here

 

Ahri: WAAAAAHHH

 

Evelynn: It’s not here at the studio either

Evelynn: @Sona @Kai’sa

Evelynn: Any news?

 

Sona: Nope, no one has found a heart shape earring

 

Ahri: Waaaahhhhh

 

Evelynn: @Kai’sa

 

Akali: Ahri, are you sure that you can’t replace or at least have your earring remade?

 

Ahri: It wouldn’t be the same

Ahri: That earring was left with me when I was found

Ahri: And I had it ever since

Ahri: I didn’t wear it during my teen idol years bc my ear wasn’t pierced

Ahri: But i decided to wear it full time when i comeback from my hiatus 

Ahri: It’s hard to explain but it means a lot

 

Evelynn: @Kai’sa

 

Akali: No i get

 

Irelia: May I suggest that it might have been stolen?

 

Ahri: kjdsjdfhksdhgkashgkadhgklj

Ahri: STOOOOLENNNNN NYOOOOOO!!!

 

Evelynn: Couldn’t you have eased into that one, myophelia?

 

Irelia: Sorry…

 

Taliyah: You can’t deny that isn’t a possibility

 

Evelynn: That is true.

Evelynn: There are some crazy fans

 

Ahri: WAH I DON’T WANT IT TO BE STOLEN WAAAAAHHH

 

Evelynn: @Kai’sa answer me

 

Akali: It’s probably not stolen, Ahri! Don’t worry!

 

Irelia: It could be stolen, though.

 

Akali: Senpai, you’re not helping….

 

Evelynn: We still can’t rule it out…

Evelynn: @Kai’sa do you have anything at all or are you sucking Sivir’s lips???

 

Kai’sa: No I am not sucking Sivir’s lips.

Kai’sa: I’m sucking her neck

 

Akali: Oh come on!

 

Evelynn: Really kai’sa???

 

Kai’sa: I’m sorry that I want to put a hickey on my gf’s neck?????

 

Evelynn: At a time like this????

Evelynn: Where are you???

Evelynn: Did you even go to the mall??

 

Kai’sa: Sivir and I went off on our own after we searched the mall

Kai’sa: we asked the front desk

Kai’sa: Put on an announcement 

Kai’sa: Sign some shirts for fans

Kai’sa: Took pics with fans

Kai’sa: But no one said they saw a heart shaped earring

Kai’sa: or picked it up

 

Akali: Couldn’t you have said that earlier?????

 

Kai’sa: Can I not have ten fucking minutes to have some quality time with my girlfriend?????

 

Ahri: YOU COULD HAVE FOUND MY EARRING IN TEN MINUTES!!!!!

 

Kai’sa: I didn’t find it!!!

Kai’sa: I even gathered fans at the mall to do a group search

 

Ahri: WHAT IF ONE OF THEM DID FIND IT AND THEY STOLE IT!!!

 

Kai’sa: I assure you they wouldn’t

 

Ahri: THEY COULD

 

Kai’sa: If they did, I would have caught them

 

Ahri: YOU’RE TOO BUSY SUCKING SIVIR OFF

 

Sivir: HEY

Sivir: I am the giver and Kai’sa is the receiver, let's be clear on that.

Sivir: I let her mark me tho

 

Taliyah: I don’t want, nor care about my friend’s sex life, thanks.

 

Akali: I don’t want to be scarred, thanks.

 

Sivir: Fuck you two

 

Irelia: Why do I check this chat?

 

Sona: Bc it’s always exciting to read, Xan Irelia.

 

Irelia: STOP CALLING ME BY MY FULL NAME

 

Ahri: HEY WHO CARES HOW KAI’SA AND SIVIR FRICK FRACK, MY EARRING IS STILL MISSING!!!

 

Akali: None of us found anything

Akali: Your earring could be anywhere

 

Ahri: WAAAAHHH

 

Evelynn: Sigh…

Evelynn: I say we all go home and figure out what to do.

 

Akali: Okie

 

Ahri: waaaahhhh

 

Sivir: Kai’sa says she’ll be home a bit later

 

Akali: You two want to make out

 

Sivir: No.

 

Taliyah: Liar

 

Ahri: Nasties

 

Sivir: Don’t nasty shame us.

 

Taliyah: Nasties

 

Sivir: Shut up

 

Evelynn: Embrace it.

 

Ahri: COME HOME AND COMFORT MEEEEE

 

XXX

 

Ahri: HI HI HI I MIGHT DIE TONIGHT!!!!! 

Ahri: HAAAAALPPPPP

Ahri: FOXY IN DANGER FOXY IN DANGER!!!

 

Kai’sa: Oh, so I guess I should not go home?

 

Ahri: KAI’SA KAI’SA KAI’SA KAI’SA KAI’SA KAI’SA KAI’SA KAI’SA KAI’SA!!!! HAAAALPPPPPP

Ahri: AKALI AND EVELYNN MIGHT REALLY KILL MEEEEE

Ahri: FOXY IS IN DANGER

Ahri: I REPEAT

Ahri: FOXY IS IN DANGER

Ahri: NINJA AND THE SUCCUHOE ARE TRYING TO KILL MEEEE

 

Akali: WE SURE WILL 

Akali: NOW COME OUT!!!!!!!!!

 

Ahri: NYOOOO

 

Kai’sa: Do I even want to know what happened?

 

Evelynn: GUESS WHERE HER FUCKING EARRING IS???????

Evelynn: GUESS

 

Kai’sa: Where?

 

Evelynn: ON HER FUCKING EAR!!!!!!

 

Kai’sa: What??

 

Taliyah: I’m sorry what?

 

Sona: Hmm?

 

Irelia: So it’s not stolen?

 

Evelynn: IT WAS ON HER EAR!!!!!

 

Akali: THE WHOLE TIME!!!

 

Irelia: Cool.

 

Kai’sa: So she didn’t lose it?

 

Akali: NOOOO

 

Evelynn: SHE FUCKING FORGOT IT WAS ON HER FUCKING EAR!!!!!!

Evelynn: LIKE HOW????

 

Ahri: I SOWWY IT WAS AN HONEST MISTAKE!!!

 

Akali: HOW DO YOU NOT REALIZE THAT YOUR EARRING IS ON YOUR FUCKING EAR!!!!??????

Akali: WE CANCELLED OUR DAY FOR THIS DAMN EARRING!!!!

 

Ahri: I SOWWYYYYY IT WAS A FOXY MISTAKE!!!!!

 

Kai’sa: So I don’t need to come home?

 

Evelynn: YOU CAN COME HOME TO MAKE US SOME FOX STEW!!!!!

 

Ahri: NYOOOOOOOOO

 

Kai’sa: I’ll just tell Sivir to turn around.

Kai’sa: Going to spend the night at her place

Kai’sa: Bye~

 

Ahri: KAI’SA KAI’SA KAI’SA SAAAVVVVEEE MEEEEE

 

Kai’sa: Have fun, love and kisses xoxoxo

 

Ahri: KAAAAAAIIIIIIIIISSSSSSAAAAAAAAA

 

XXX

 

Evelynn: Hello, K/DA has lost their foxy leader, Ahri. Please respect our privacy during this tragic time.

 

Sona: So sorry for your lost.

 

Taliyah: Sending thoughts and prayers.

 

Kai’sa: She shall be missed.

 

Sivir: Her legacy will live on.

 

Akali: I shall never forget her.

 

Ahri: I AM STILL ALIVE!!!!

 

Evelynn: Wow, it’s like she’s still here.

 

Ahri: BC I AM HERE!!

 

Akali: It’s like she’s right next to me

 

Ahri: I AM NEXT TO YOU

 

Kai’sa: K/DA won’t be the same without Ahri

 

Ahri: I AM RIGHT HERE

 

Evelynn: The remaining three of us shall continue Ahri’s dream of spreading music across the globe.

 

Sivir: Amen.

 

Sona: Amen

 

Taliyah: Amen.

 

Ahri: AKALI MAKES EVELYNN BABY HER WITH MILK AND COOKIES AND BEDTIME STORIES AND SHE DEMANDS TO BE TUCKED INTO BED WITH HER STUFF DRAGON, SIR NIN NIN

 

Sivir: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

 

Akali: AHRI YOU BETTER RUN BEFORE I CHASE YOU DOWN!!!!!

 

Ahri: OH NOW I EXIST!!!

 

Evelynn: YOU WON’T BE FOR LONG

 

Ahri: COME AT ME

Ahri: I AM READY THIS TIME!

 

Kai’sa: I’m going to go back to bottoming so have fun you guys.

 

Taliyah: aksdfhklsdjfhjadshlkfjk

Taliyah: KAI’SA

 

Sivir: ;)

 

Sona: Hahaha, it’s always an exciting day with K/DA

Sona: Isn’t that right, Xan Irelia?

 

Irelia: I didn’t even text in the chat!

 

Taliyah: But you knew and responded to Sona anyways?

 

Irelia: ...

 

Irelia left group chat “K/DA”

 

Taliyah: LMFAO

 

Sona: She’s so easy to tease, haha

 

Akali added Irelia to group chat “K/DA”

 

Irelia: LET ME LEAVE

 

Akali: No