Seokjin isn’t sure why he agreed to attend Pride this year. He had never gone before. Not because he didn’t support the cause, not at all. He was as far away from straight as a jalebi sweet himself. It’s just the loud music gave him headaches and the amount of people there really exhausted his INTP ass. So he himself is surprised at why he’s here until he sees his three-months-out-of-the-closet younger brother and his two best friends and realizes the exact reason why he’s here.
Jimin, currently clad in nothing but rainbow shorts, is dancing to the loud edm beats while twirling a rainbow umbrella in tandem. Each of his cheeks adorns a small rendition of the pride flag as he drinks his way to kingdom come.
Taehyung on the other hand is even more far gone than Jimin with his whole torso painted in in rainbow colors and pompoms in his hands; waving rather frantically.
Behind the two is Seokjin’s twenty two year old baby brother Jungkook. The normal one.
Jungkook had begged Seokjin to come to the parade just so he can, for the first time, be a part of it with his identity on display. However Jungkook’s idea of identity on display was wearing his technical college’s complimentary T-shirt that had the 1977 Apple logo on it. It didn’t even have the correct color order of the flag but Seokjin knows Jungkook doesn’t care. For Jungkook this is about celebrating in the outdoors that Jungkook was gay and accepted.
The moment Jungkook had told his parents they had called Seokjin, working in the UK, and Seokjin had told them to send Jungkook to London to talk to him face-to-face when really he just didn’t want his little brother to go through the conservative bullying he did when he came out. Being pansexual himself, Seokjin understood the kind of thoughts that might be circling Jungkook’s mind therefore he thought it best to be there with him just in case.
It was a huge blessing that all the shock and frustration that their parents had, of having a son that belonged to the lgbtq+ community, had already poured out when Seokjin had come out to them a good eight years ago when he was just nineteen. Now they were just spent and accepting of the matter and that made it so much easier for Jungkook now that he had decided to come out on his own terms at age twenty two.
So Seokjin schools his features as he steps out of his car. The only reason he’s here is to keep an eye on those three and then drive them home safe and sound because he knows they won’t be sober enough for it.
Seokjin knows he stands out. In a crowd of rainbow-clad people with painted faces and artistic costumes, that impress Seokjin as well, he stands there looking quite out of place in his crisp black button down that’s tucked neatly into his formal trousers and oxfords. The neatly combed hair and the spectacles don’t aid either. He couldn't help it. The moment Jungkook had texted him that there was free drinks, Seokjin knew he’d have to take off from work early to make sure they didn’t get abducted or attacked and drive them home. So there was no other way except to come in his work attire.
Jungkook waves to him as soon as he looks up from his phone and Seokjin waves back. The other two are still a little too into their own thing to notice that Seokjin is here. So Seokjin urges Jungkook to go join them, make new friends; ensures him that he’s standing right here on the sidewalk under the shade of the closed bakery’s awning, saving his suit from all the color being thrown around.
Truth be told Seokjin knows a lot of people here. He’s been to the town’s pride before maybe once or twice in his four years of being in the UK. People have started to know him as well. But Jungkook doesn’t know anyone since he moved with Seokjin only two months ago therefore Seokjin wants him to make some like-minded friends. Jimin and Taehyung were not exactly what he expected but he doesn’t mind sharing his two closest pals with his younger brother.
Even today people pass by waving at him. Some asking if he’s finally ready for joining the extravaganza eh. Others ask him how he’s been and if he came straight from work. Some even ask him to introduce them to the shy sport that’s a new face at the parade. Seokjin politely declines them all thinking it’s better for Jungkook to find someone on his own.
From the corner of his eyes he sees a tuft of mint green for a split second only before it collides with him; lightly so. At least Seokjin thought it was lightly so but looks and sees the tuft of green is actually the person’s hair and is now haywire. They look shaken while Seokjin didn’t move a muscle from where and how he was standing. He does look kind of small though compared to Seokjin’s own tall self.
The person, who Seokjin now notices is a man probably in his early twenties, is quite a sight if Seokjin were being honest. A mint green undercut framed the most adorable looking passive eyes that held a little bit of fire in them. They wore a mesh necked black tee shirt that was mostly hidden under a blush silk bomber jacket along with the tightest pair of black pants Seokjin had ever seen. Finishing the look were the show-stopping Jagger Wanderlusts that stood out from even afar. Seokjin also notices the person had quite a lot of piercings in their ears and a strikingly beautiful butterfly tattoo on their right hand.
A pretty handsome guy if Seokjin were to admit, if it weren’t for the scowl that was adorning their lips. The scowl, that was for him.
“What are you doing being a mountain in the middle of the sidewalk?”
Seokjin looks astonished. Maybe that’s too big of a word but he certainly is taken aback a little. “My apologies, but I was just standing here.”
“Well stand somewhere where people don’t walk alright?”
Seokjin makes out the underlying Korean accent that’s masked with a little bit of British but not quite there yet.”Do you not suppose that it is a little rude of you to ask me that since you ran into me when I was literally just standing here?” Seokjin rolls his eyes and whispers under his breath “This is why I don’t like coming to pride.”
Unfortunately the man hears him and, as is evident to Seokjin, his hackles are raised. “What did you just say? Well maybe if you had something in your life that was stressful enough for you to demand rights about it you’d like coming to pride. Maybe if you or your family weren’t all hets, you’d understand why it’s important-”
The man goes on. Seokjin knows this person is assuming everything about him wrongly but he just stands there with his hands in his pockets; doesn’t bother correcting him. Doesn’t deem it necessary; believing he probably won’t ever see him again.
“--and there are matters, of importance; importance greater than you not wanting to go to pride-”
And he’s cut off in the middle by someone holding him. Someone that towers above him by a lot. Focussing now, Seokjin realizes it’s someone he knows. “Namjoon!” He exclaims.
The mint haired guy turns around in Namjoon’s grasp and fixes him with a glare, “You know this corporate looking het?”
Namjoon snickers, “What are you even on about Seokjin’s probably dated more men than I have.”
Seokjin doesn’t really appreciate Namjoon giving away his dating history to someone who is evidently a complete stranger to Seokjin. But as soon as he’s about to open his mouth he’s cut off again by his newly acquired nemesis, who has jumped free of Namjoon’s hold.
“Then you should know even more why this is important. Gay or bi or pan yourself and still not liking parade.”, he hmphs and a stray hair from his messy undercut side-part flairs to life which, quite frankly, Seokjin thinks is beautiful. “Supporting the cause is part of eliminating the problem. People need this-”
He goes on and on until Namjoon holds him back once more. “Yoongi!” Namjoon struggles to hold on but does so finally, much attributed to his height and strength that towers the minty menace. “Yoongi, wait, clam down will you? Listen to me.”
Seokjin silently admits to himself that Yoongi is a very pretty name and suits the guy.
“No! People like this need to be taught the struggles we have had and-”
Namjoon rolls his eyes as he physically puts a hand on the smaller man, Yoongi’s, mouth, “Lord do you ever shut up.” Only that it leads to Yoongi biting down on his hand as Namjoon hisses and pulls it away, rubbing at it. “What are you? A cat?”
Yoongi fixes Namjoon with a glare quite akin to one. “Why are you taking his side. He said he doesn’t like pride. He’s basically a traitor.”
Namjoon chuckles a little before he answered, knowing what he’s about to say will embarrass his feisty little best friend. “Seokjin here, is one of the most noted openly pan people in the community. He’s donated to more lgbtq charities than I can count and even helped open up teen rehabilitation centers in town. So like,” He shrugs with a cheeky smile that flaunts his dimples, “Thou shalt not judge maybe?”
At this Seokjin sees Yoongi calm down quite a lot. By quite a lot, it means he finally shuts up and Seokjin sees a quite visibly dark tinge of pink crawl across his cheeks which is much more prominent due to his already pale skin.
Yoongi is embarrassed.
Seokjin is enamored.
“Anyhow.” Namjoon looks at Yoongi and points to Seokjin, “Yoongi! this is Seokjin. Director and owner of the SJ restaurants here in London. I know him from childhood in Korea.” Then he turns to Seokjin and points at Yoongi. “Seokjin! This is Yoongi. We went to university together.”
Just as he finishes Yoongi elbows him in the side as he mock-whispers, “What a contrast in introductions. You couldn’t have said I’m the CEO of my tech firm?”
Namjoon rolls his eyes for the umpteenth time, “Yoongi is CEO for Syzygy tech. Quite big. If you need any tech solutions for your chain, call this dude right here. Or like with anything remotely concerning free-will.”
As if on cue Yoongi raised both arms in the air, enthusiastically; hands balled into fists as he smiles and practically yells “I’m all for abortions and gay people.”
A few passerbys clap, some yell back with abortions and gay people , some shout encouragements like you go little dude, you the man. And that just fuels Yoongi’s already evident gummy smile as his eyes turn into little crescent moons and he has his teeth and gums on full display.
Seokjin is enamored more than he should be.
Namjoon, standing behind Yoongi, grabs both his hands and brings them down “Okay pipe down you lgbt worker that works with shouts and fights only.” with that he hands the awareness fliers that were in his hands to Yoongi, “Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go find Hoseok.”
And thus he leaves the two of them alone and Seokjin sees Yoongi blushing once more; the color of embarrassment not quite fading yet.
“Nice to meet you.” Seokjin holds out his hand for a handshake.
Yoongi takes it, rather shyly and Seokjin find it comparable to all things adorable. “Why didn’t you say anything when I was running my mouth?”
“I’m just, not like that, I suppose.” Seokjin shakes the hand, lingers a little, before putting it in his pocket. “There’s no point in explaining myself to a complete stranger; especially if they’re angry.”
Yoongi takes that as a cue to explain so he puts both his hands in his front pockets as he stretches back on just his heels . “Male pronouns.”
He bites his lip.
Seokjin is a goner.
“Especially if he’s angry.” Seokjin reiterates, replacing the they in his previous sentence.
“Yeah, sorry about that.” Yoongi rubs the back of his head. “So, you are?” He trails off, not wanting to come off as rude and assumptive. Well not anymore than he already had that is.
“Cis. Pansexual.” Seokjin explains and Yoongi is in awe of the confidence.
It still takes Yoongi immense amount of courage to say all that so casually. So he doesn’t. “Cool.”
And Seokjin senses the unease. Doesn’t ask.
“If you don’t like pride then why are you here?” Yoongi asks, hostility gone now.
Seokjin sighs, “I suppose I do owe an explanation now that we’re… acquaintances. I’m an introvert. I don’t love crowds and parties. But.” He points over to Jungkook who is shuffling his way in for a good spot to see the parade. “That’s my brother. Freshly gay out of the closet and I’m a worrywart elder brother.” He points to Jimin and Taehyung, “Plus those are my friends and I gotta drive them home because clearly, they can’t.”
Yoongi sees the two half naked rainbow clad men and laughs.
It’s an inaudible sound. But Seokjin hears it. Yoongi’s laughter comes in small bursts like the impossibly tiny stray drops from a fountain that hit your face. And Seokjin is drenched.
So he smiles back with something that reaches his eyes. “Say Yoongi, would you like to meet up tomorrow?”
“I’m hosting a pride dinner sort of thing. Only close friends that is. It’s sort of a family tradition and now my brother’s a part of it too so it’s special.”
Mainly it’s because Seokjin has seen Jungkook be a little overwhelmed and he’d like it if his brother and friends spent the rest of pride weekend at home. The dinner part isn’t wrong though. Every year Seokjin invites his close friends of the community and treats them to something extravagant in his restaurant.
Yoongi looks confused and indecisive.
“Namjoon and Hoseok are invited too.They’re finally in town in time for the dinner this year.”
Yoongi is still indecisive.
“I’d love it if you can make it.” Seokjin smiles.
That night Yoongi spends hours listening to tidbits about Seokjin from Namjoon.
The dinner is chaos.
Everyone wants to meet everyone and everyone needs introductions and Jimin wants to show off his henna tattoos and Taehyung wants to be everyone’s friend while Namjoon wants everyone to listen to what the new manifesto of the NGO he works at is.
Yoongi keeps telling him the only manifesto they should have is abortion and gay people because that would make one hell of a slogan.
Everyone laughs and the madness continues.
Jungkook sits quietly at the table; scuffing his cuticles when a hand stops him.
“Don’t do it.” It’s Yoongi, and he raises his own hands; scraped and bandaged “You’ll get addicted and then it’s not pretty.”
Jungkook lets go of his nail-beds and puts his hands on the table as Yoongi introduces himself to Jungkook.
Jungkook smiles shyly in return, “I’m Jungkook. Seokjin hyung is my brother.”
“Yeah, I know. You look alike.”
Jungkook puffs his cheeks at that. “I wish we were alike.”
Yoongi quirks an eyebrow.
“He’s so confident with his sexuality and everything and I’m just-” His voice goes quiet, “Just a mess.”
Yoongi encourages the little boy, “He’s been out of the closet for eight years now dude. You’re like three months in.” He seen Jungkook being surprised and explains, “Namjoon told me.” and Jungkook relaxes. He trusts Namjoon because Seokjin trusts Namjoon.
“Well he was this confident even when he was just three months in.” Jungkook continues, “Fought with dad, the neighbours, his school; basically everyone who said he wasn’t normal .”
Yoongi cannot help but be impressed. Namjoon had told him that Seokjin’s coming out story had been tragic, even if it did end in a happy ending, but he never told him any details.
“If it weren’t for him fighting for it, I’d have probably never told dad.” Jungkook looks a little troubled, “I’ve got him but sometimes I think, he had no one.”
The kid looks besotted with Seokjin with admiration. Yoongi spares a glance at Seokjin who is currently holding an oven-tray of a whole roasted chicken; his elegant hands hidden in mittens and he sees it. Sees a strong-willed man willing to let nothing harm him, his family or his pride. Sees someone Jungkook would rightfully look at in admiration.
Yoongi decides at that moment that he wants to learn everything about Seokjin. All his struggles, all his moments of weaknesses when he had no one. All his little likes and peeves. How he came to the UK at just twenty three years of age and built this empire of a culinary business.
Seokjin sets the chicken down and removes the mittens. “And finally, welcome to dinner my queer Korean friends.” Then he laughs.
He starts from laughing to himself until it bubbles up and overspills as he says “My queerian friends.”
Loud groans of disapproval arise from the table however Jungkook and Jimin double over in laughter.
Yoongi himself finds it a little hard to not smile. Not at the stupid pun, no. But at the beautiful way that Seokjin’s eyes crinkle when he’s laughing to his fullest. It makes him want to smile. Seeing Seokjin’s full lips curl up as he tries to keep them pressed together to stop laughing; is breathtaking.
“Alright now.” Seokjin says when they’ve all calmed down. “Let’s have a moment of silence for those who passed away in the fight and struggle to bless us with the rights we have today.”
Everyone stays silent for a minute and as soon as Seokjin finishes his small prayer, he says “Dig in.” and hell breaks loose.
Everyone is busy munching on dinner rolls and cinnamon buns; savory gravies and crispy chickens being passed around like the fliers Namjoon was distributing. Amidst all of this Yoongi’s eyes are on Seokjin. He notices how poised Seokjin is when he sits; all straight back and delicate manner-hands. He notices Seokjin chewing and humming like the piece of chicken is something way above just culinary pleasure.
His eyes trail along Seokjin’s neck as he drinks from his glass of Vodka; his Adam’s apple moving with the action and making Yoongi swallow in return as well.
Seokjin must have noticed him looking because when he’s done he looks at Yoongi and makes a questioning face. Yoongi is glad that the inquiry seems genuine and that Seokjin isn’t aware of how bothered he just made Yoongi.
Yoongi shakes his head in a gesture of saying nothing .
Seokjin smiles serenely and then blinks while nudging his head in the food’s direction as if to offer Yoongi to not hold back.
Yoongi decides this is the man he’s willing to trust with his secrets.
So Yoongi pursues him.
Yoongi pursues him and Seokjin is very accommodating at times but sometimes it’s clear that it gets on his nerves a little.
Seokjin sits on his director’s desk at the restaurant HQ and Yoongi’s sitting there with his tall tumblr of vanilla milkshake, watching Seokjin go by his daily routine of keeping accounts, making rounds and greeting some regulars.
Every now and then Seokjin passes him a glance and smiles a little in acknowledgement and Yoongi’s heart soars.
Some other days he comes at times when Seokjin is too busy with whatever it is he does. Yoongi doesn’t know. Frankly Yoongi doesn’t care either. He sits there, sipping on his drinks that alternate between milkshakes and alcohols; deep in thought over if he should ever come out to Seokjin. Not as gay because god knew everything about him screamed gay .
Truth be told Yoongi had been a goner since moment one. He may have bumped into Seokjin but he did notice the crisp all black attire and the spectacles. Namjoon had told him that Seokjin was noted in the town’s lgbt community for charity work and Yoongi had become impressed. But then Seokjin had told him why he was actually there, out of his comfort zone; just to look out for his baby brother and Yoongi was charmed. Just the thought of him looking out and caring for his kin to help them settle in their skin proudly and show support was touching to Yoongi since he had lacked that part growing up. Besides, responsibility is attractive as fuck, right?
He sits there, wondering. Wondering how incredible it is. To be only twenty seven and be this confident self sufficient man.
Yoongi himself was all that too, don’t get him wrong. And he’s a year younger than Seokjin to boot. But Yoongi never really got that confidence thing going for him. Too shy. Always behind a computer screen to avoid interaction. Always in headphones to avoid conversations.
Meanwhile Seokjin? Seokjin was a conversation starter. A man assured enough to joke about himself and confident enough to praise himself. A confronter.
So that’s what he did. Confront.
Yoongi’s sitting on his usual table in the restaurant when Seokjin goes to sit in front of him. “So. Is there something you want to tell me? Or ask me?”
Yoongi is quite visibly startled by the question and averts his eyes to think of an answer that won’t be either too embarrassing or just borderline rude. He tends to do that a lot; lashing out when confronted.
Seokjin sighs. “Look. I’ve seen you come here, day in, day out. Is there something you need? Or want?”
Yoongi thinks hard on the question. It’s not like he needs Seokjin; he isn’t at that level yet. It’s just he feels like he wants to get closer to Seokjin and for that he might need to come clean with Seokjin. Therefore, he decides, what better time to tell someone your biggest vulnerabilities than when confronted face-to-face huh?
So he asks, “Can we uh - can we talk? Like in private somewhere?”
Seokjin senses the discomfort in the sentence from a mile away. Wants to ease it. But can’t unless he knows what caused it. Obviously the need to share something that isn’t entirely pleasant causes discomfort but Seokjin needed to reassure Yoongi that he wasn’t scolding or chastising him and just asking.
Sitting here in Seokjin’s pristin restaurant with Seokjin in his work clothes and yoongi in his black capri pants and a pale yellow tee with white suspenders and his floral boots; it surely looked like Seokjin was reprimanding him. So he needed neutral ground. Somewhere where Seokjin wasn’t an owner and Yoongi wasn’t a customer.
“Alright!” He says standing up, hands in pocket. “We’re going into town.”
“Nowhere far silly, just Covent Garden. I need to show you an alley and we can talk there.”
Yoongi seems perplexed and Seokjin is glad. This means he hasn’t already seen what Seokjin wants to show him. “But I need to change first. Otherwise people will think I’m your butler or something.”
Yoongi smiles a little at that. “Let them maybe?” The tone is cheeky.
“Brat!” Seokjin says but he’s smiling as well.”No thank you! I have a change of clothes in the office. Lemme just have a second to change and call Jungkook and we can head out.”
And Seokjin does just that. Calls Jungkook to let him know he’ll be late and is with Yoongi in case he can’t reach him for some reason. Always better to be safe. He changes into his oversized cream pink hood with faded blue jeans and Yoongi seems in awe. Seokjin has to agree that he does look rather different than his formal work attire.
He gives his staff instructions on things beyond Yoongi’s comprehension and then grabs the keys to his Panamera from his office; signaling Yoongi to follow.
All of this routine is somewhat attractive but instead of admitting that Yoongi jumps off from his chair and follows.
They ride in silence for about two minutes before Yoongi asks if he can get his feet out the window and Seokjin looks at him like he grew two heads. They bicker for about two more minutes before Seokjin caves in and Yoongi’s floral and blue 1460 victorian Doc Martens are on the sill. His alabaster ankles open to the wind in his capris and Seokjin can’t help but stare. They look so nimble and smooth and Seokjin wants to kiss them both and where the fuck did that thought process come from?
Oblivious to Seokjin’s very peculiar thought process Yoongi sits with his legs stretched like a feline, one hand playing with his own hair, the other scrolling on his phone and his feet semi-out-the-window; looking like he came from a photogravure.
To Seokjin his thought process suddenly makes sense.
They park the car in a parking lot beside Covent Garden and Seokjin tells Yoongi to follow him. They go down a spiral of alleyways and narrow streets until Seokjin stops in front of one. A very inconspicuous sign on the top says Neal’s Yard and Yoongi is forced to think why he hasn’t known this place exists.
Inside and across the alley is a small courtyard with a splash from a paint palette surrounding it. The buildings are vibrant and tall; all different colors. The walkways are all pavers or brick. The shops on the ground level of the building include everything from warm smelling bakeries to salons boasting Hair by Fairies as their signboard. The middle has rustic benches and tables that each flaunt a potted tall plant of their own as a centerpiece and Seokjin flops down on one of the benches.
Yoongi is still circling on his axis. The place is overwhelming. He snaps two-three pictures of it, trying to capture the whole length of the buildings and the extravagant walkway at once.
Seokjin just sits there, content to look at Yoongi enchanted by all the colorful surroundings, yet to Seokjin he stands out the most in his frame of sight.
Once satisfied, Yoongi comes to sit in front of Seokjin on the stumpy bench. “Pretty neat place. Why didn’t I know this existed. I’ve been living in this goddamn city for almost a decade now.”
“Not everyone finds it on the first go. Isn’t exactly an in-the-sight thing.” Seokjin shrugs. He notices Yoongi rubbing his palms together to warm them up and offers, “I got us coffee, should be here in a minute. It’ll warm you up and your hands as well.”
Yoongi is grateful. Though he doesn’t tell.
“Until then,” Seokjin takes both of Yoongi’s hands in his. “I had pockets, my hands are in better condition. Why’d you wear half sleeves anyway?”
Seokjin is warm.
Yoongi is enamored.
“How was I supposed to know we’d be far from sunlight under tall buildings? Plus nobody said the weather would turn rainy.” Yoongi grumbles; but makes no effort to take away his hands from Seokjin’s toasty grasp. He likes it. Having his hands held. Likes the feeling of Seokjin’s knobby fingers holding his thumbs as his warm palms hide away Yoongi’s chilled fingers in their blanket. Likes how his hand fits against Seokjin’s. Ponders on how he’d fit against Seokjin.
He sits there wondering. Wondering how his body would fit against Seokjin. How Seokjin’s warm hands would feel against his cold porcelein skin. Wonders how the color of Seokjin’s slightly tanned skin would look against his never-seen-the-sun stomach.
His thought process is brough to a halt by the server setting down two cups of coffee on their table and Seokjin speaks. “Do you want to start talking now or when you’re done drinking?”
Yoongi takes his hands out of Seokjin’s grasp to settle on the coffee. It’s a little scalding. Not homely toasty. Not comfortingly warm. Not nearly as pleasant as Seokjin’s body heat.
But Seokjin wants him to start talking.
So he sits there wondering. Wondering how Seokjin would react. If his expressions would show the usual twitch of lips that he always got. Or if he would get a more apparent more evident reaction. If he’d be treated any different. Or if all his hidden hopes of possibly being with Seokjin would be crushed.
So he takes in a breath; shudders it out and speaks casually. Putting on a brave front. An indifferent front. A casual tone as he says around the lip of his cup with a small shrug “I just kinda wanted you to know I’m trans I guess.”
# syzygy means the alignment of celestial bodies.
# everything that Yoongi wears in this? Is my aesthetic but also Run era Yoongi's somehow? lol
# I am extremely open to any suggestions on how to tag this more effectively since i haven't written anything in this spectrum I can't be too sure of myself :)
Hope you all like it *^*
Chapter 2: The Downpour
Let it pour!
I post ramblings about this fic on twitter with the tag #B_I_T_R so if you're going to comment anything about this fic on twitter please use the tag or term B_I_T_R so i can see it too
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
“I’m trans.” Yoongi says and Seokjin looks at him like he sprouted two heads. Yoongi takes this as a sign that this is it. This is it because Seokjin is looking at him like everyone else does once they find out; surprised, shocked and somewhat enraged. It’s always the rage part that gets to Yoongi. He doesn’t understand why anyone would be angry about his gender identity.
So he ventures and braces himself and with a fair amount of courage, asks.
“Why do you look like you’re annoyed.”
Seokjin looks at him with an even more irritated expression before he blurts out, “ That’s what was keeping you restless and worried?”
Yoongi blinks, like a cat in front of a car-light. “Well, I mean, yeah, I mean, mostly. Yes.”
“Min Yoongi, good heavens Min Yoongi.”
“Why are you saying my full name, this is slightly terrifying.”
Seokjin slams both his hands on the table, “You’re telling me you’ve been coming to the restaurant, looking all bothered like someone put a damp towel in your pants, been having the weirdest reaction to a confrontation; all over your gender?” He calms down a little and retreats back, “I thought you had like a terminal disease or went bankrupt or made someone pregnant or something.”
Yoongi is kind of in awe because yes, he has seen the same reaction before with the high-pitched screaming and the hands slamming on the table but it has always been accompanied with sentences like Why didn’t you tell me beforehand? What, so you’re like-in the middle?” “Were you born with it or did you get it?”
This was probably the first time where someone was enraged but not at his gender. In fact it was hilarious how they were enraged at him being worried about his gender.
So Yoongi is a little more than enamored now and he can’t help it. He just wants to go around the table and hug Seokjin in the tightest embrace possible with his shoes giving him enough height to bury his nose into Seokjin’s neck.
But this is Min Yoongi. So instead of doing all that, he deadpans.
“I can’t do that y’know.”
“Do what?” Seokjin is confused.
“Make someone pregnant.” Yoongi’s face looks equal parts cheeky and embarrassed with hints of apprehension here and there in a smile wrinkle or two.
But Seokjin sees it.
“So I see you’re the type to joke about your insecurities to get over them?” Seokjin sighs.
“I mean the whole world does it.” He waves his hands in dismissal before settling them back on his warm coffee. “So the whole can’t beat ‘em, might as well join ‘em shebang works for me.”
Seokjin looks incredulous, “I cannot believe you are twenty six years old and your coping mechanisms are of a child.”
“Are you comforting me or insulting me?”
“I’m killing two birds with one stone.”
They both share the silence after that and the only sounds are little sips of coffee being gulped down to avoid being the one to break the silence.
However, Seokjin breaks it. Yoongi did know he was braver than Yoongi in that regard. And many others.
“So you’re afab?” Seokjin’s tone wasn’t condescending, neither is it something awed to imply that maybe Yoongi wasn’t ordinary. It was like an introduction. Nonchalant and simple.
Yoongi liked it. He nodded in affirmation.
“I’ve worked with many trans people before at the centers and the camps but I’ve never had the chance to befriend any.” Seokjin smiles at Yoongi and Yoongi can tell that it’s genuine, “So I’ll need you to guide me if I make any comments or questions that I shouldn’t. Will that be okay? I just need you to know that I don’t have enough knowledge on the matter so like just know that I don’t mean anything ignorant I say, if I say it, though I’ll try not to say it-”
“You’re rambling.” Yoongi sits with his arms crossed, amused.
“Well excuse me if I don’t want to come off as rude.”
“You were rude the moment you said you agreed you were insulting me.”
“Did you see your face all week? You looked like your favourite cake went bad because you forgot to put it in the fridge.”
“First the wet towel, now bad cake?” Yoongi sighs, “Where do you come up with your similes.”
Yoongi feels light. This was the most easiest coming out he’s ever had to do. Even easier than explaining to his employees in the firm, who were all fresh grads, a young lot; infinitely more accepting than the generation above them.
Yoongi feels light, so he smiles.
Seokjin was right. Seokjin was right when he thought Yoongi’s laughter comes like tiny stray drops from a fountain and god seems to agree. As soon as Yoongi’s gums come on display in a smile that Seokjin can define in only one word; relieved. As soon as it happens, a small drop hits Seokjin’s hand and he looks up too see god manifesting Seokjin’s definition of Yoongi’s lips curling upwards.
There’s drizzle there and Seokjin is lost in thoughts of fate and destiny of how befitting it was to start raining just now. He looks down to see Yoongi had no such inclination and was wrapping his arms around himself and it hit Seokjin, like the slowly speeding raindrops, that Yoongi was in half sleeves.
So Seokjin stood up, “Let’s get out of here, I think the rain is gonna get heavier.”
Yoongi downs the remains of his coffee in one big gulp and follows Seokjin out into the alleyway where they came from. Somewhere along the way his teeth start chattering and he curses the London weather for the millionth time in his almost ten years of living in the city.
Yoongi hears rustling on his side and takes a peak from the corner of his eyes only to look down his cheeks coloring as he sees Seokjin cross his arms on his front to grab at his hoodie and pull it upwards; taking his pale blue tee shirt along with it and leaving Yoongi to miserably sneak glances at the sliver of Seokjin’s lean exposed stomach.
Seokjin takes it off and looks to Yoongi and Yoongi whips his head down way too fast for a normal human being. Seokjin offers the pullover to Yoongi and Yoongi takes it quietly not trusting himself to form coherent words if he were to protest.
Yoongi pulls it over his head and Seokjin is love-struck.
The hoodie reaches past Yoongi’s hips and stops at mid-thigh level and it just drowns Yoongi in a way that Seokjin can only describe as adorable.
By the time they reach the car, they’re both soaked to the bone and Yoongi worries about Seokjin’s car-seat for a split second but the rain makes it inevitable to sit down in his own puddle.
Seokjin adjusts the rear-view mirror with one hand and sweeps back his wet hair with the other and Yoongi’s heart picks up speed.
It starts to pour heavily when they both catch their breath from the brisk walk and Seokjin put the key into ignition but doesn’t turn it and turns himself instead.
Seokjin’s hand is cold and wet when it rests on Yoongi’s cheek and his lips are everything Yoongi dreamed of when they rest on Yoongi’s lips. He’s leaning over the middle console and as soon as Yoongi starts responding to his rather bold move, his other hand reaches across to unfasten Yoongi’s seat-belt. Yoongi is very glad for this generosity allowed in movement.
So Yoongi lets go of his inhibitions and returns every nip of the teeth and every slant of the lips.
Neither of them venture into the tongue territory yet and neither of them complain about it.
Out of breath and out of wits, Seokjin lets go only to stare at where his lips were a few seconds ago. He sees them move and form sounds but doesn’t register anything until Yoongi puts a finger under his chin to reangle his face and forces him to look at his eyes instead. Only then does he realize that Yoongi was talking to him.
“How did you know?”
Yoongi looks genuinely curious and Seokjin is amused and a little gratified. “You and I we’re both humans Yoongi.”
Yoongi’s look of confusion doesn’t go away.
“We’re all human after all. And humans tend to be the most vulnerable about the things they take pride in, when in front of the people they take pride in.”
Yoongi’s eyes widen and Seokjin can see a bit of moisture there.
“It’s been almost two and a half weeks since you’ve been coming to the restaurants and not saying anything. You just sit there, playing with your food and looking like you want a chance to talk but can’t muster up the courage to make that chance. ”
Quite frankly Yoongi feels a little attacked but mostly he feels like he’s put on the spot.
“That, and like your cake went bad because you forgot to put it in the fridge.”
Yoongi gives Seokjin a light slap on his thigh.
Seokjin turns the key and the car jerks forward and stops. Yoongi looks at the gear shift with the knowing expertise of a driver and then at Seokjin who coughs awkwardly after he realizes the gear is set to first and not neutral. “Sorry, uh, must’ve accidentally hit it during the kiss.”
Yoongi covers his face with both his hands and groans in frustration. “Just drive.”
It’s completely adorable because Yoongi’s huge hands are drowning in the too-long sleeves of the hood.
After they’ve hit the road and Seokjin is driving smoothly and the aircon is warming their wet bodies up as Yoongi tinkers with Seokjin’s aux cord, Seokjin smiles and speaks without taking his eyes off the road.
“For thinking I was worthy enough to see the vulnerability.”
Yoongi blushes but mumbles something that Seokjin can’t understand but he shifts gears as he still smiles fondly and nods nonetheless.
They reach Seokjin’s house and Yoongi complains however Seokjin’s right when he justifies that even though he knew the address, he had never been to Yoongi’s house before and he didn’t want to go there like this, without something sweet, for the first time.
They both enter and Seokjin announces loudly, “Kook I’m home. Yoongi’s over.”
“I’m in the shower.” a loud but muffled-by-the-door voice comes back, drowned out by the sound of music and flowing water.
“Kay.” Seokjin yells back and then comes back to normal decibels as he addresses Yoongi, “We’ll have to take turns in my shower I guess. This way.”
He leads Yoongi into his bedroom and Yoongi is impressed. It’s nothing huge or ornamented but it is quite neat and proper. Yoongi’s about to sit down on the bed when Seokjin almost gives him a heart attack as he yells, then apologizes profusely, “Please don’t get in the bed without a shower. I don’t like it and Kook does it all the time and it drives me insane.”
Yoongi’s caught between whether he should be offended for the yell and lack of hospitality or should he laugh because Kook deserved praise.
He settles on the second as he raises his arms and glares at Seokjin with a smile, “Go Kookadooks.”
“Please don’t call my brother Kookadooks.” Seokjin is busy taking out fresh clothes from the drawers. “And please don’t encourage his behavior.”
“Hey, he’s proud of you.”
“Yes I know, and I want him to be proud of himself instead. But that’s beside the point.” He hands Yoongi a pair of light blue pajamas and points to the master bathroom, “We’re gonna have to take turns because Kook’s speakers were on and if there’s music, it means his shower is a long long shower.”
“We could go together.” Yoongi wiggles his eyebrows.
Seokjin is caught off-guard. “Excuse me.”
“You know, me and you, in the steamy downpour.” Yoongi’s faking all these extra gestures with his hands and it’s so cute but so annoying.
“Just get on with it you gremlin, why are you so set on making my life difficult?”
Yoongi chuckles, the dim sound actually audible with how silent Seokjin’s room is. “I was joking. You’re so flustered.”
“Just go before you catch a cold, sheesh.”
By the time Yoongi’s done showering, Seokjin has already brought warm tea to the room with little bite-sized coconut cookies and Yoongi thinks this is what home feels like.
Though home could use some normal-sized pajamas for people who don’t have freakishly tall limbs.
An exaggeration of course. Seokjin was only a few inches above Yoongi but his shoulders are two Jimins wide and Seokjin’s pajamas rest a little too loose on Yoongi’s frame. Now Yoongi doesn’t have the shoulder span on the small side either but he still drowns in Seokjin’s top and the pajamas pool at his feet.
Yoongi’s drying his hair, rubbing aggressively with the towel when Seokjin comes closer and takes the towel from Yoongi’s hands. “You’re gonna get split ends like that.” he says and starts to towel Yoongi’s hair a bit gentler.
Yoongi feels all kinds of things but mostly awkward for just standing there and not knowing what to do as Seokjin pampers him. Once he’s done Seokjin, points to the tea at the side-table, “There’s tea and cookies, I won’t take long.”
Yoongi just nods shyly, still not over the close proximity they shared a little while ago and Seokjin goes to the bathroom only to peak back out and say, “Don’t look anywhere you’re not supposed to.” and closes the door once more.
Yoongi stands there for three seconds before shouting back, “I’m gonna look at your panties.”
“I don’t own any fuckin panties.”
“Well you should.”
“Yoongi what the fuck.”
“Jussayin. They’re comfortable too. The lace feels good.”
The sound of something like a bottle or a tube falling to the ground comes from the bathroom and Yoongi chuckles before he hears Seokjin's bewildered comment of “The who feels what now?”
“Don’t jerk off to the image.”
“Dear Lord above, let me die in this warm downpour.”
“You wanna die like every rich millionaire in shitty movies? By slipping in the bathroom?”
“Yoongi. Shut. Up.”
“Shower to your death oh tall one. You will be remembered as one that was clean.”
And Seokjin stops responding, so Yoongi takes to looking around.
There’s pictures, of Seokjin, but mostly of Jungkook. From when they were kids to school life to even college. Yoongi finds it incredibly lovely that Seokjin’s wall has not only his own graduation photo but Jungkook’s as well. There’s certifications of stars for SJ restaurants and Yoongi finally understands the SJ isn’t Seok Jin but rather Seokjin and Jungkook.
There’s a lot of framed awards for helping the lgbtq community and Yoongi feels his chest swell just looking at them.
Seokjin was a beautiful person inside and out. And this beautiful person was standing in the bathroom door with his pajama top bunched up and settled on his shoulders like a towel and his trousers settled on his hip-bones like a sin.
“I forgot to take a towel.”
Yoongi didn’t respond, but he also didn’t turn away.
Seokjin’s pajamas had wet patches too from his legs not having been dried off properly, but what Yoongi couldn’t stop staring at was Seokjin’s waist.
The water droplets that traveled down from Seokjin’s chest, that Yoongi did not want to look up to at all, ended at his waist and got absorbed in the waistband of his pajamas and maybe Yoongi would prefer if they didn’t. Maybe Yoongi would prefer if he drank them up instead.
He snaps out of it after that. That was weird Yoongi, note to self: masturbate when home, it’s been long.
Yoongi looks up and watches Seokjin rummage the drawers for a clean towel and decides to risk it. So many bold moves in one fuckin day. What was Seokjin doing to him. He chuckled to himself and that caught Seokjin’s attention.
“Did you say something?”
Yoongi shrugs, “I didn’t but I kinda want to.”
“Sure, go ahead.” Seokjin goes back to fighting with clean sheets and pillowcases to look for the extra towel set he kept.
“Can we kiss again?”
Seokjin pauses. His hands stop where they were and he turns around, crossing his arms in front of his very broad and still very naked chest.
“You’re very upfront about these things, I didn’t expect that.” Seokjin closes the drawer with his back by leaning against it.
“You literally met me shouting abortions and gay people in front of a hundred strangers. I think I’m pretty upfront.”
“That’s the thing.” Seokjin’s smile has amusement, “I’m not a stranger.”
“That’s the thing.” Yoongi’s smile has mischief. “I don’t want you to be.”
They close the distance in two to three strides and Yoongi stands on his toes now that he’s barefoot and doesn’t have his doc martens to support him. Their lips meet and Yoongi’s shower-warm body turns warmer and Seokjin’s semi-wet cold hands on his cheek suddenly feel like heaven.
Seokjin takes the first step and puts both his hands on Yoongi’s waist, pulling him closer. Seokjin’s mouth rests slanted on Yoongi’s and as soon as Seokjin bites Yoongi’s bottom lip Yoongi backs away and breathes.
“Too much?” Seokjin’s eyes are full of concern and worry and Yoongi finds that endearing but he also wants to laugh because that isn’t what his intention was.
“No, not enough.”
Seokjin startles, and Yoongi looks to the side, to the ground, basically anywhere but Seokjin’s face as he mumbles out, “Tongue.”
Seokjin shakes his head as if trying to register what Yoongi just said. “Huh?”
Yoongi walks over to the bed and sits down, feigning nonchalance even though his heart was racing a mile in a second. “Can we kiss? Like with tongue and all?”
Seokjin walks over and sits beside Yoongi, centimeters apart before he turns to the side, and grabs a hold of Yoongi’s torso pulling him closer before he rests his lips on Yoongi’s once more.
Seokjin kisses Yoongi’s lips thrice before he moves both his hands under the hem of Yoongi’s top and Yoongi gasps at the cold fingers that ignite goosebumps on his warm blood-rushed skin.
Yoongi has to remind himself to praise Seokjin later for getting entrance into his mouth like this instead of licking at his lips or asking to open his mouth. Seokjin’s tongue is quite a contrast to his fingers in temperature and Yoongi feels overwhelmed with ticklish sensations as Seokjin runs his tongue on the roof of Yoongi’s mouth.
They kiss for an eternity before Seokjin pushes his hands a bit more upwards and Yoongi’s hands rush out from Seokjin’s sides to hold his hands there and then; stopping him from going any upwards. Seokjin can hear Yoongi’s heart beat even without feeling it.
Seokjin understands and lowers his hands once more.
Though it doesn’t help Yoongi much because now Seokjin’s hands rest on his thighs and Seokjin is gripping both of them while his long thumbs run side to side on each one. Seokjin let’s go of Yoongi’s mouth and moves towards his jaw; going downwards with each new sound Yoongi makes; making sure for every new kiss to be open-mouthed with little nips and kitten-licks. As per Yoongi’s request.
Yoongi makes a particularly loud sound in his throat and Seokjin’s hands are suddenly under his thighs and it’s insane how easily he’s picked up and placed on Seokjin’s lap, a leg on each side. Yoongi wraps his arms around Seokjin’s shoulders, gripping hard as Seokjin kisses up his neck and cranes his own to meet Yoongi’s mouth now that Yoongi was above him. Yoongi’s rakes his hands through Seokjin’s hair throughout the kiss and then downwards to his neck and then back at his shoulders for support.
Seokjin’s mouth reaches Yoongi’s raging pulse and he sucks a bruise as Yoongi’s hands make their own bruises on his bare back.
The door latch clicks and Yoongi’s about to scram off Seokjin’s lap and probably under the bed or something but Seokjin’s hands are firm on his sides and he cannot move.
“Seokjin, oh my god, someone’s coming.”
Jungkook opens the door, already chewing something, cereal bowl in his hand and he stands there, stunned for a minute.
Yoongi wants to combust into thin air from the sheer embarrassment of it.
Jungkook chews for two more seconds, then swallows and points at Seokjin, “You’re shirtless,” points to Yoongi, “He’s on your lap.” takes another spoonful of what is more cereal and sugar and less milk. “Your mouth was on his neck when I opened the door, is this the part where you say it’s not what it looks like ?”
Yoongi’s heart drops to his stomach. The three second wait before Seokjin speaks drives him nuts and into all sorts of horrors as he imagines Seokjin saying yes and disowning anything they shared in the past fifteen minutes.
Yoongi looks up from his lap, where he’d been boring holes because he couldn’t meet eyes with Jungkook from embarrassment. But Seokjin just denied them being misinterpreted and hence affirmed them being interpreted and that means he had owned up to the interpretation that Jungkook had, was his interpretation even that bad? Well he has eyes he could see what happened and now Yoongi was making no sense to himself.
Jungkook swallowed his second spoonful and gave an indifferent little shrug, “Cool!”
Seokjin raised a brow in question “Cool?”
Jungkook spoke up again. “Yeah, cool. I like him.” He stirred the fruit loops back and forth in his bowl. “I came to tell you I took your spare towel.”
“Ahan, wash it before you give it back.”
“Okies.” He says before he adds, “Aren’t you gonna scold me? I took your towel.”
Seokjin smiled at Jungkook and nodded his head in the direction of the blush red lump, that refused to look up, sitting in his lap, “It may have helped.”
Jungkook smiled back softly before he switched gear and gave Seokjin a finger-gun as he made a clicking noise with his mouth with a cheesy grin and closed the door again.
As soon as Jungkook closed the door Yoongi hid his face in the crook of Seokjin’s neck. He was warm and Seokjin could see the blush had taken over his ears and had gone down to his neck even.
“Hey Yoongi.” Seokjin spoke softly, as if cooing, “Hey, look at me, it wasn’t that bad.”
Yoongi refused to come out of the safe space he had claimed in between Seokjin’s shoulder and neck and a moment passed before his shoulders started shaking.
“Hey, are you crying? Shit.” Seokjin tried his earnest to make Yoongi look up but he didn’t. “I can make Jungkook apologize if you were offended by anything, but at least look at me.”
Yoongi didn’t look up but at least there was a response, Yoongi shook his head in a no and clutched onto Seokjin tighter before he sobbed out. “I think I’m in love with you.”
Seokjin grabbed Yoongi’s waist tighter and fell backwards onto the bed, pulling Yoongi on top of him, who still did not leave the crook of Seokjin’s neck.
“You worry about the stupidest of things Min Yoongi.”
“So Yoongi and Seokjin are boyfriends.” Namjoon says.
Jimin gives an eye roll, “Are you asking us or telling us?”
Jimin looks at Namjoon deadpanning, “No offence, I love your lips but sometimes they say the stupidest things.”
“You love my lips?”
Jimin groans but leaves it at that. “They act like they are but they’ve said nothing. Plus I asked Kook, they haven’t even gotten to second base yet.”
Jungkook interrupts as he looks up from his phone, “Oh they’re a thing.”
“How do you know?”
“I asked them if they were not a thing. Hyung said nope, which means they are a thing. Get it?”
“So it’s official?”
“Saw them shirtless and everything.”
Namjoon backtracks, “Wait what, you saw Yoongi shirtless?”
“Nope, he wasn’t, hyung was.”
Namjoon squints as if he’s in deep thought and Jungkook breaks it, “Give it up einstein, hyung has seen him. Stop worrying.”
“Seokjin has seen Yoongi shirtless?”
Namjoon smiles to himself. “Guess, they’re serious then.”
Jungkook returns an understanding smile and nods happily.
It’s nothing as dramatic as the others imagined it to be.
It happens during an insanely arousing makeout session in Yoongi’s bed, where Seokjin’s hands crawl under Yoongi’s shirt again and Yoongi stops them before they reach his chest. Seokjin startles but doesn’t relent and pulls Yoongi closer by the sides before he whispers in his ear, “Hey, it’s just me.”
Yoongi’s hesitant at first. But Seokjin spoke the words out with such conviction that Yoongi felt like he’d be denying Seokjin his right if he refused. Besides it wasn’t fair. It was an equal relationship and only Yoongi got to roam his hands on Seokjin’s bare torso. Seokjin too must want to hold Yoongi. Must want to touch every inch of his skin with aching fingers. Must want to kiss the nooks and crannies of his muscles. Wouldn’t he?
As if the doubt was transmitted to Seokjin he continues his sentence with, “I want to see all of you. Every part of you. Outside or inside.” He kisses the shell of Yoongi’s ear and Yoongi trembles before he adds, “Give yourself to me Yoongi, along with all your insecurities.”
Yoongi bites his lip before he gives Seokjin a determined look and then switches their positions so that Seokjin was on his back and Yoongi on top of him with his legs on either side of Seokjin’s torso.
Seokjin gives a mischievous grin before he sobers up and realizes what Yoongi’s about to do.
Yoongi grabs both of Seokjin’s hands from where they were resting on Yoongi’s thighs and closes his eyes. He takes the hands and guides them, glides them across his thighs and then upwards under his shirt.
Seokjin stares in awe at the audacity of Yoongi to make Seokjin witness this and think that he would remain sane. Yoongi’s eyes are closed and his teeth are gnawing at his bottom lip anxiously.
Yoongi glides Seokjin’s hands on his own stomach as it caves inwards at the touch and Seokjin is losing it underneath him. Seokjin’s eyes do not leave Yoongi’s face as his fingers come into contact with Yoongi’s abdomen; caved in and pulled taught in excitement and arousal. His fingers trace Yoongi’s ribs as his chest heaves when Yoongi gasps and the sight is too much for Seokjin to take in.
Half an inch more and Seokjin’s fingers meet Yoongi’s scars.
It’s not like Seokjin wasn’t prepared. Yoongi had talked about it before. Seokjin had asked him about the butterfly tattoo on his right hand and Yoongi had said he got it after his top surgery in celebration of liberation.
Seokjin had kissed his hand more times than usual that night.
Seokjin runs a thumb across one of the scars and Yoongi’s eyebrows furrow as his gasp gets stuck in his throat before he opens his eyes.
Yoongi looks Seokjin dead center as he crosses his arms in front of him and lifts his shirt up over his head, taking it off and then worrying his bottom lip incessantly.
Seokjin keeps running one thumb over Yoongi’s scar while he uses his other hand to free Yoongi’s bottom lip from the torture of his teeth. “Don’t bruise your lip.”
Upon hearing some casual words from Seokjin, Yoongi’s shoulders drop in relief. “There you have it.”
Seokjin sits up a little, leaning back against the headboard, “They look like half-moons.”
Of course Seokjin would do this and Yoongi felt lucky because Seokjin does this.
He had come to terms with his scars after a long time but now he loved them; for of course Seokjin would find some sort of way to describe his scars poetically without belittling them.
Yoongi bent down and kissed Seokjin long and hard, trying to transmit all his feelings through the gesture.
They lay side by side when Seokjin asks, “Do they hurt?”
Yoongi shakes his head lazily into his neck, “Nah, It’s been years. They hurt in the start though.”
“Did you have anyone to care for you after surgery?” Seokjin knew Yoongi’s family wasn’t on board with this. They had had that talk before which is the reason, Yoongi thinks, why Seokjin’s hand is rubbing circles into Yoongi’s back and Yoongi likes the feel of it too much. Likes the domesticity too much.
Yoongi smiles, “I had Namjoon.” He hears Seokjin give an appreciative sigh, “Changed my bandages, helped me with the bathroom, all that shit.”
“So Namjoon has seen you completely naked?”
“Are we jealous?”
“Maybe. But I can wait for as long as it takes for you to be comfortable.”
Yoongi kisses Seokjin’s neck in adoration, “He had seen me even before I went through surgery. We’ve been best friends way too long now. It’s been eight years. I got the surgery when I was twenty one, we were already friends for three years then.”
Seokjin kisses the top of Yoongi’s head, “This is gonna come off disrespectful and assumptive but, did you two sleep together or were you not into guys?”
“Oh hell no. See I was a dudette, and Joon? He’s gay. Like hella gay. Like way too gay to function properly. Like he looks at Jungkook the way I look at coffee.”
Yoongi laughs, audible now, “You didn’t know? Your brother too looks at him like he puts the sun in the sky everyday.”
“No, that part I knew of course,” Seokjin hits Yoongi’s bottom lightly, “I know my brother. But Joon? Oh thank god.”
“Congratulations.” Yoongi says elaborately, “All your worries about your newly queer baby brother finding a douche and getting scared on his gay experiences have been flushed. Rejoice.”
Seokjin laughs along with Yoongi now. Their laughter dies down slowly and Seokjin kisses Yoongi’s crown once more. “So like, Joon was gay okay. What about you?”
“I thought I was a lesbian.”
Seokjin gives a very worried look and Yoongi continues through chuckles, “Relax, Im bi. Turns out being around guys just gave me so much gender dysphoria I started believing I was gay.” He shrugs, “Well technically I still was gay.”
Seokjin laughs airily, “But you didn’t know you’re both-ways gay.”
“Sexuality is a confusing thing. I’d rather just go with the flow if I like someone.”
Seokjin laughs whole-heartedly now, “You just described us pans in a sentence.”
Yoongi climbs on top of Seokjin once more, his lips curling into a grin, “Well then, let’s go with the flow. And the flow says I should suck dick.”
“Yoongi what the fuck!”
“You say that a lot.” Yoongi's hands are already on the buckle.
“You make me say that a lot.” Seokjin groans in frustration
"No I don't, you're just too sensitive to my bullshit."
"Well then don't say such bullshit so out of the blue."
"Be prepared for out of the blue bullshit then." Yoongi slides them off along with Seokjin's boxers in one go til his thighs.
"So it was bullshit and isn't happening?"
"Shut up and take off your pants."
Yoongi goes down on him completely and swallows him whole without any warning.
""Yoongi! What the fuck!" Seokjin says for the umpteenth time, though it comes out rather strained than usual.
Chapter 3: The Rainbow
The clouds are clear :')
Being with Yoongi is like a dream. Seokjin had always been helpful with charities and NGOs and being with Yoongi helped him get to so many more people and communities. Seokjin had asked Yoongi if he’d like to deliver a speech for an awareness campaign about the trans community.
Yoongi’s socially anxious ass had passed on that offer but he had agreed on small group sessions to share his experiences with people and guide them on how to prepare for the different levels of transitioning.
Yoongi had also come up with various tech-related systems for his restaurant chains that had eased Seokjin’s management process by a tonne.
He’s also a big help at home considering he stays to play Overwatch with Jungkook whenever Seokjin has to stay for hours upon end in meetings or go overseas for some business deal.
Jungkook himself has grown very close to Yoongi and it shows. He goes to Yoongi for advice on things specially things that need building or are related to computers. He asks Yoongi for career advice since Jungkook wants to be a game developer and Yoongi is already a programmer. He also often sells off tiny bits of Seokjin’s embarrassing secrets in exchange for a skewer or two of lamb kebabs, and Yoongi laughs the night away.
On every level Seokjin can think of, Yoongi being in his life had helped him out. He had helped with work. He helped with Jungkook. He had even helped with anything and everything that needed fixing; from Ikea furniture to broken faucets. But most of all he had helped Seokjin appreciate life and himself more. That’s when Seokjin knew this is it; that Yoongi is it.
Seven weeks into dating Yoongi and Seokjin still hadn’t managed to get Yoongi comfortable enough for base three. However Seokjin was a patient man. He didn’t want to rush Yoongi into anything that might make the younger uncomfortable about himself so he never said anything. A love rushed is a love crushed.
Seokjin had wanted complete and utter trust from Yoongi for a long time. However Seokjin gets it when he least expects it.
Intimate moments among them have been limited to the torso as far as Yoongi was concerned. That too had taken them about three weeks to get to.
Seokjin likes to think he isn’t like the typical man and doesn’t think with his dick. He likes to think he’s capable of loving someone even if physical intimacy was off the table and to be honest he is. He is capable of loving Yoongi even without any touches that much he was sure of after all these months of unofficial dating and then seven weeks of official dating.
But sometimes it just gets so difficult to not touch Yoongi. To shower him with the amount of love he deserves for making Seokjin’s life so much better. To not pull him under the covers and unravel him like the bud he is. To not be one with him on a physical level. To not show him how much he’s capable of having a normal sex life as any other person. But if only Yoongi would let him .
It frustrates Seokjin sometimes, when he feels that Yoongi hides himself away from the romantic rapport that they have only because he somehow feels himself unworthy of it? Why? Seokjin doesn’t understand that.
They’ve talked about it. Like mature adults. That’s how Seokjin likes to phrase it even though the conversation they had went something like Yoongi telling him “We’ll get there when he wants it” while pointing at his crotch with both hands.
“You call it a dude?” Seokjin was amused and bewildered at the same time.
“Yeap!” Yoongi had nodded, “He’s a hunter.”
And that was the end of that conversation.
Of course Seokjin knows why Yoongi is apprehensive and of course he assured him that Seokjin is in no hurry.
But right now Seokjin is in his bed and he’s waiting for Yoongi to come over after work as he does three out of the five working days a week and Yoongi keeps sending him little encouragements and Seokjin understands why humans are weak.
He sits in bed staring at the rather provocative texts from Yoongi (Who’s supposed to be in a meeting in his office by the way) and then contemplates why he ever assured Yoongi that he was in no hurry.
Seokjin knows Yoongi does this on purpose. Riles him up and then revels in the effect he has on Seokjin. It’s sort of like Yoongi’s pastime, however what Yoongi sends next drives out a yell from Seokjin and Jungkook comes rushing to ask what happened.
“Nothing. Nothing at all.” Seokjin says a little too speedily, a little too cautiously.
Jungkook isn’t placated. “You sure? Why’d you yell then?”
“There was a cockroach.”
“You’re not afraid of cockroaches Jin, you used to collect them remember?”
Seokjin sighs at the mention of his four year old self’s hobbies, “Ugh don’t remind me. Anyways, it was nothing. No need to worry.”
Seokjin watches as Jungkook’s line of sight roams all of Seokjin; making sure he isn’t hurt, and then lands on his phone. “Oh I get it.”
Seokjin looks to the side sheepishly.
“Sexting was never your thing.” Jungkook delivers his bit of wisdom sagely and leaves.
Seokjin buries his face into the pillows and screams out the jitters before he looks at his phone again.
There on the screen is a picture. It might not even make sense to the naive eye to be honest but it does to Seokjin. It’s a tiny sliver of black; Yoongi’s pants Seokjin concludes. Then a tiny sliver of pale alabaster; Yoongi’s skin, Seokjin concludes. However it’s what’s in the middle that bothers him.
And Seokjin is a goner.
What is an even more turn on is that Yoongi took this in his office. Yoongi was wearing lace panties to work. And if that wasn’t enough, he had the audacity to lift his shirt a tiny teensy bit and take a picture of his waistband. Yoongi was on a mission and boy oh boy was he succeeding.
Seokjin was so immersed into the shock of it all that he forgets to read what Yoongi captioned the picture until now and then his mind goes into overdrive because if Seokjin’s language skills haven’t failed him, then that spells He’s ready .
Yoongi enters Seokjin’s apartment and Jungkook is already out with Namjoon. He spots Seokjin in the kitchen sorting out leftovers from the day and goes to hug him from behind. The content hum that leaves Seokjin is what Yoongi thrives on.
Seokjin finds it adorable how Yoongi clings to him and walks with his small pit-a-pat steps behind him while he goes about the kitchen looking for tupperware lids and using his spatial skills in the refrigerator.
Yoongi finds it amazing how Seokjin can go around accomplishing his tasks while Yoongi’s clung to his back like a child not wanting to let go. But it’s taking too long so he whines.
“What’s taking you so long, it feels like you’re about to bake one of your really time-taking cakes.”
“I might as well. We have the occasion.”
“What’s the occasion.”
Seokjin turns in Yoongi’s arms and lifts him up easily putting him on the counter and standing between his legs. “Aren’t we about to pop your cherry today?” He says with mirth in his voice and his finger booping Yoongi’s button nose.
Yoongi scoffs in return, “You really think I’m a virgin?”
Seokjin closes the distance between their lips under the dim kitchen counter lights. “I’ll make sure you feel like one.”
And Seokjin is enamored all over again.
“You know that one Madonna song.” Seokjin giggles as he hums turning around, “Touched for the very first time.” He sing songs out of the kitchen.
Yoongi remains sitting blushing on the countertop for a good two seconds before he yells, “I am offended.”
“And I for one am thrilled,” Seokjin yells back from the living room. “So get your ass in the bedroom if you don’t want me to start in the kitchen.”
Yoongi hops off the kitchen counter and walks into the living room. “Take me.”
Seokjin looks at him incredulously but incredibly fond. He walks over to where Yoongi stands and picks him up, his legs on either side of Seokjin’s waist; straddling him as he kisses Yoongi. “You’re so demanding.” Seokjin laughs out but obliges as he takes Yoongi to the bedroom.
Yoongi’s still in his slacks and button down, along with his tie when Seokjin throws him down onto the bed and stands at the foot of it. He climbs at the end of the bed, his eyes focussed and hazed with something Yoongi couldn’t pinpoint was lust or love; or maybe a mixture of both.
Seokjin takes off his own shirt and Yoongi is reminded that this is really happening by the piercing concentration in Seokjin’s eyes. Seokjin makes quick work of Yoongi’s buckle before he slides out the belt from it’s hoops.
“You’ve been sending some quite interesting content while at the office.”
Yoongi breaks their eye contact and looks to his side, his cheeks tinged a bright red.
“I’ve been anticipating seeing in person.” is all Seokjin says before he slides off Yoongi’s slacks completely; guiding his nimble ankles out of them as he throws them to the side.
Yoongi lays there with his white formal button down barely covering the dark red lace hiding his private parts. He dares take a peek at Seokjin and Seokjin’s gaze turns carnal.
Seokjin starts with his eyes locked with Yoongi’s and two of his fingers walking delicately on Yoongi’s right foot and his left hand resting on Yoongi’s jutting hip-bone; thumb drawing circles in the lace, feeling the fabric in his hands.
Seokjin smirks before he takes a hold of Yoongi’s foot and Yoongi’s ticklish body automatically doubles over in response as a surprised yelp leaves his mouth when Seokjin bring his foot closer to his lips. Yoongi’s toes curl as his head thrashes side to side when Seokjin kisses the roof of his right foot, slowly trailing upwards.
Seokjin licks a stripe across his delicately wispy ankle and Yoongi tries his best to release his leg from Seokjin’s hold, running away from the ticklish sensation involuntarily.
To Yoongi’s relief Seokjin stops mouthing at his ankles but to Yoongi’s woes, he moves upwards; his long knobby fingers diving underneath the waistband of Yoongi’s panties.
Even though Seokjin would agree that lying there in nothing but a simple white dress shirt with his tie still loosely hanging from his neck and his plush bottoms in a blood red pair of laced panties was the epitome of Yoongi looking delectable and ravishing. But it was time they were off.
So he pulls down the flimsy fabric, leaving it bunched up at Yoongi’s thighs, and Yoongi’s legs close off; again involuntarily.
Seokjin pries them apart as he kisses Yoongi hard and long, “I feel lucky that I’m the one to finally be able to love you the way you deserve to be loved.”
And Yoongi relaxes. Not because he was coaxed but because he knew he was in capable hands. He knew he was in trustable hands. He knew he was with someone he won’t be able to let go even if the universe were to try. So he stopped shuffling his feet on the bed and let go, entrusting himself to his one true love.
Seokjin takes off the piece of garment all the way; kissing Yoongi’s trembling thighs, leaving bruises in places only he’d be able to see. With every kiss or lick Seokjin moved upwards and Yoongi knew what was coming but he still wasn’t prepared when Seokjin went down on him, licking and nipping. Yoongi’s hands went into Seokjin’s hair, holding on for dear life.
At first Yoongi was worried he might be causing Seokjin some pain from how hard he was pulling on the hair but then Seokjin sucks and Yoongi arches off the bed deciding this was no time to be considerate as he grabs onto Seokjin’s hair, thrashing his legs and bruising his own lips from how hard he was biting down on them.
Needless to say the next one and a half hour was proof that Seokjin was no joke when it came to intimacy if Yoongi’s trembling thighs, bruised torso and swollen lips were anything to go by.
Once the wall built by Yoongi’s insecurities is broken down, they find themself in the bed quite a lot. It takes them one too many times of being apart for too long and finding out they’re both shit at skype sex; before Seokjin asks Yoongi to move in with him and Jungkook.
“Why can’t you move in with me instead?” Yoongi takes the offer as a blow to his pride and manliness.
Seokjin thinks it’s immature of him to do so, “You know I can’t leave Jungkook to live on his own. The kid would burn the house down in a span of two days. Besides, I thought you liked him.”
Yoongi gives in, they’d been at it for about ten minutes of useless banter. “I love the kid. Trust me I do.” And Yoongi does, it’s true. “But it’s his indifference towards seeing you and I naked too many times that scares me.”
Seokjin laughs wholeheartedly. “Isn’t that better? We don’t have to worry about being caught considering he’ll just continue eating his cereal even if we are.”
Yoongi grumbles as he walks out of the conversation mumbling, “Yeah, let’s see his indifference when he sees your dick down my glory hole one day.”
Seokjin runs after him, “Did you just refer to your hunter as a glory hole.”
"I said what I said."
"Yoongi, what the fuck!"
Long story short, Yoongi is smitten and says yes to moving in with Seokjin.
When sitting down in his office and thinking rationally, it dawns on Yoongi that the offer is a jackpot. Seokjin is an amazing chef, his brother is amazing at household chores, they both love him to bits, and the house is warmer and livelier than Yoongi’s sad old apartment. All that coupled with the fact that he gets to be with the love of his life ninety percent of the time seals the deal.
However it’s the being together for so long part that scares him the most. Long term exposure to things too beloved lessens the love and Yoongi’s afraid he might bore Seokjin with his constant presence. But he agrees nonetheless.
He’s willing to give it a try.
Jungkook arrives to help him move his stuff and it warms Yoongi that he’s not only getting a significant other but a family as well. The huge bun is smitten with Yoongi and looks up to him for almost everything; still a tad bit less than he looks up to Seokjin though. Yoongi agrees though, it’s for good reason. Seokjin should be looked up to.
One joke about how he should be looked up to because he’s taller than both of them drives Yoongi to smack Jungkook on the head and focus on moving his boxes.
“Why didn’t Seokjin come himself though.”
“Oh he went to Jooni-.” and by the way Jungkook stops midway Yoongi knows something’s up that involved Yoongi himself.
“You’re not good at secrets and you’re even worse at cover ups kiddo,” Yoongi says tiredly, “Might as well just complete what you were about to say.”
Jungkook curses under his breath because he knows it’s true. So he relents, “He went to Joonie to ask him about stuff.”
“Stuff?” Yoongi raises a brow.
Jungkook gives an exasperated sigh, “Stuff you’d need and stuff he’d need to live with you, because Joonie was your roommate in college.” And all of a sudden Jungkook’s talking really fast, “But he means well ,trust me, he just wants to be prepared and all. Don’t hate him. He loves you.”
“Good lord you’re gonna give yourself a hemorrhage. It’s cool.”
Jungkook gives an animated Phew and Yoongi laughs with his whole heart at how much Jungkook cares about his brother.
Seokjin has the notes app on his phone open as he diligently writes everything Namjoon tells him.
“Hot water bottles and chocolate are the only solution I was able to come up with for keeping the monster sated every month. Also never, ever ask him if it hurts, he’ll tear you limb from limb.”
Seokjin just nods along to every bit of wisdom Namjoon has to offer.
“Plus hold his hand all the time if possible.”
Seokjin looks at Namjoon with squinted eyes, “I’m a little jealous but I’m grateful for the knowledge so I’ll let it slide.”
“I should just let you go unprepared in front of the satan’s waterfall as he likes to call it and then we’ll see your jealousy.”
Seokjin sighs, “I said I’m grateful didn’t I?”
And he is. These are things Yoongi would never tell him. So he was more than grateful when Namjoon himself called him up after finding out they’re moving in together. He’d explained everything in detail from when Yoongi started testosterone and when the effects wore off and he started his period again.
However among all of this had come the small implication from Namjoon that Yoongi could bear kids if he wanted and Seokjin’s stomach did not only a flip but a whole cartwheel. However he had instantly decided he’d leave that part to Yoongi and had promptly told Namjoon the same.
Namjoon had smiled with pride and hugged Seokjin at the end of their conversation, “I’ve been with Yoongi from the start of his transitioning journey and even before then. And I’ve seen everyone he’s dated. I’m glad it’s you he has settled on.”
Seokjin felt a huge weight lift off of his shoulders.
Namjoon continued, “It’s funny how I’ve known you so long and him as well but I never thought you both will cross paths someday and just stick.” He smiles, “But I’m glad he’s with someone willing to put in so much effort to understand him.”
Seokjin smiles warmly before he turns mischievous, “Can I expect the same in return?”
Namjoon sputters, “Of of cour- you mean Kooki-I mean Jungkook? Of course.”
Seokjin laughs. He feels the same about Namjoon. Jungkook could never find anyone better.
Three quarters of a month of living together it happens and Seokjin has never been more thankful for Namjoon. He doesn’t mind shopping for supplies at all but it’s when he receives odd looks that he decides Namjoon is an angel for putting up with all of this all throughout college.
It amuses both Seokjin and Yoongi how cautious Jungkook is; treating Yoongi like he’s fragile or something and always bringing chocolate on his way home from college.
Months pass and Seokjin makes way for a lot more products in his bathroom than he was used to including bath bombs that apparently look like oranges but taste nothing like them according to bath bomb taste test veteran Yoongi himself.
He sees a lot more blacks and whites in the cupboards and a lot more jewellery in the dressing. All in all it’s like everything that his life was missing was being completed piece by piece.
So he decides to pop the question.
It happens a year after they met each other. The pride is around the corner and Yoongi is prepping himself to shout at the top of his lungs once again in favor of both abortions and gay people.
It’s the one day out of the whole year where Yoongi is actually thrilled to meet people and go out. So it’s the one day that Seokjin picks to propose to Yoongi in front of everyone he knows and more.
Jimin is kept in charge of hiding the ring until asked for and Taehyung is in charge of keeping Jimin away from alcohol until the proposal is over.
Hoseok is in charge of keeping Yoongi company until Seokjin can reach the pride. Namjoon and Jungkook were given explicit instructions of being on a date or as Seokjin said ‘Yoongi would be suspicious why they weren’t together and alone on their first pride together.’
To Yoongi’s complete and utter surprise, Seokjin enters pride on one of the floats and offers Yoongi his hand; pulling him up onto the illuminated float with him.
It’s night and all the lights are on full display hitting Seokjin’s face with multiple colors in multiple intervals and it seems perfect to Yoongi.
But then it gets better.
Seokjin bends down on one knee and Yoongi knows what’s about to happen but he goes lightheaded and instead prays honestly that at least someone is filming because his mind remembers none of it.
Jimin hands Seokjin something and Seokjin holds the box open on his hands as he goes “Min Yoongi. You know I fuckin hate pride.” And Yoongi laughs, a wet sound that tells Seokjin he has teared up already, “But I would do it a thousand times over if it means meeting you every time.”
“I didn’t even ask yet.”
“You’re taking too long.” Yoongi is full on crying now as he pulls Seokjin up from his position, “Ask dammit.”
“Yoongi.” Seokjin braces himself, “Will you spend the rest of your life with me?”
“Yes, yes fuck yes.” He pulls Seokjin from the lapels of his jacket and kisses him as the whole parade roars to life beside them.
The week leading up to the wedding is both exciting and nerve wracking for both Yoongi and Seokjin.
They both decide to bear expenses fifty-fifty and spend a good three days deciding the venue even though Seokjin’s pretty sure he’d marry the man wherever he’d want even if Yoongi were to say a marketplace or a graveyard.
To much of Seokjin’s relief Yoongi decides on the Cloister Garden at the museum of the order of St. John. Seokjin had never been there but he trusts Yoongi and his two hundred plus pins worth of pinterest wedding board.
The venue is filled with greenery and the buildings are all old stone walls giving the whole place a very medieval air and Seokjin finds it to his liking as well and Yoongi and him divide the 3600 pounds down to every penny.
When Seokjin asks Yoongi for the ring he had proposed with, it results in a fifteen minute chase around the house with Yoongi refusing to take it off in fear of bad luck.
It costs Seokjin all of the wind in him and a giggling Jungkook holding a pouty Yoongi in place to get the ring in order to put it on Yoongi again under the wedding arbor.
They go separately to get their suits; Seokjin with Namjoon and Yoongi with Jungkook.
“I’d have thought you’d prefer going with your brother considering you’re always on his side.” Yoongi remarks.
“I’m here for him. He loves you to bits and I’ll make sure you look perfect for him on his big day.” Jungkook leaves Yoongi blushin in the dressing room.
Seokjin turns around in front of the mirror, admiring his dark navy suit from every angle.
“Do you want to try a white one? Just for kicks?” Namjoon suggests.
“Nah, Yoongi’s definitely going to get a white one. I know him that much from our one and a half years together.”
Yoongi stands in front of Jungkook in his white suit with a semi-sheer shirt button-down and a completely white waistcoat with elegant self print. The jacket had peak lapels and it all made Yoongi feel like he was getting married. Somewhere in his heart Yoongi had decided this was it and if Jungkook argued Yoongi was sure that he will fight the kid.
“It makes you look taller. Get this.”
Yoongi deadpans at him and flips him off before mimicking Jungkook’s voice while saying, “All that talk about making me perfect for your brother and this is how you chose the suit.”
“Do you not want to look taller in front of the tall tall Jin hyung?”
Yoongi huffs throwing his arms in the air as a sign of both exasperation and agreement. He’s about to go change back into his mastermind tee when Jungkook calls for him and when Yoongi turns around he’s handed a veil. A small white birdcage veil that was slanted at the front and would reach just the middle of Yoongi’s button nose.
Jungkook nods, “Just doin’ my job here.” He puts the veil on Yoongi’s head and clips it on the side of his mint turned faded blonde hair. “Makin’ you perfect for Seokjin hyung.”
Yoongi looks at himself in the mirror and he knows he has to agree. This is perfect.
The wedding is a small affair with only their close friends and family. Seokjin’s parents finally make time to visit their son in London and Yoongi’s mother makes an appearance however his father refuses to attend and Yoongi is surprisingly fine with it.
“I’d rather he not attend than to come and create a scene. It’s my happy day and I won’t let him ruin it.” is what his mother says and Yoongi gives her the gummy smile she has seen raising him up.
The photographer is Jungkook and he makes them do all kinds of absurd poses on the pre-wedding shoot which turn out looking magical on film.
On the actual day, they decide to keep separate dressing rooms on the request of Yoongi’s mother to respect tradition and not see each other before meeting at the altar. They’d decided who enters first via a game of rock papers scissors and Seokjin just had really good luck but Yoongi’s mother was ecstatic that she’d be able to walk her son down the aisle.
Jimin helps both of them dress up and keeps giving Seokjin tidbits on how Yoongi looks like a dream and Seokjin is half ready to disrespect Yoongi’s mother and go visit Yoongi’s dressing room at that very moment.
However when he stands under the arbor he decides it was all worth it as he sees first Jimin and then Taehyung and Hoseok walk down the aisle. His jitters increase when the second set of people come in and seeing Jungkook shyly linking arms with Namjoon as he walks down the aisle with Namjoon’s dimples on full display as he smiles at Jungkook’s bashfulness is wholesome.
Then it hits him full force as he sees the love of his life dressed in all white complete with a veil coming towards him. He feels like everything he’s done in his life was just an excuse to lead him up to this moment as Yoongi comes and stands in front of him. The veil covering his eyes looks exquisite and Seokjin thinks he’s never seen a more beautiful person in his life even though he’s seen this same person every day for the past one and a half year.
Jungkook makes sure to capture all his expressions on camera. He also makes sure to capture the sparkles at the corners of both Yoongi and Seokjin’s eyes.
Their wedding vows are easy and uncomplicated with Yoongi vowing to fix everything Seokjin needs in his life from his furniture to his woes and Seokjin vowing to love Yoongi as rigidly as the two hundred year old olive tree they stand under right now.
They kiss and Seokjin tips Yoongi during the kiss just like in the movies that Yoongi likes to watch but denies watching.
Over the course of the next year Yoongi gets used to living with Seokjin and Jungkook even further. It’s like a safe space where they roam around in their pajamas or boxers all day and take turns on making dinner. It’s peaceful, it’s homely and it’s safe.
The last adjective that he uses is what makes him firm on his decision that he’s about to propose to Seokjin.
They lay in bed in a post-coital haze. Seokjin is just beside him still catching his breath after their second round and it will always amaze Yoongi how much stamina Seokjin has.
Seokjin kisses his temple and then his cheek, still covered in sweat, “That was amazing. You’re amazing.” and Yoongi decides to put forth his question before he can back out.
“Jinnie do you ever want kids?”
Seokjin stops mid-kiss; his lips still attached to Yoongi’s collarbone as his eyes look up to stare at Yoongi’s face.
Seokjin is being careful, like he doesn’t know whether Yoongi actually wants to pursue the thought or he just asked out of curiosity only to shut down any hopes Seokjin might have. Yoongi wouldn’t be that cruel would he?
“I mean, I like kids yes. I used to love taking care of Kookie when he was little but then he grew up to be a building with feet.”
Seokjin’s typical way of reflecting anything remotely concerning with a joke is at play and Yoongi knows it. But at least Yoongi rests easy now. He knows Seokjin is not averse to idea of it. So now he decides to play.
Yoongi climbs on top of Seokjin, “Do you maybe? Want to? Try for one?”
Seokjin’s eyes widen in surprise and his grip on Yoongi’s bottom tightens before he screams “Oh my goodness gracious yes yes yes.”
Yoongi takes the strip of condoms they keep on the side of their bed and slides them off the table and for some reason Seokjin is very turned on by that.
Yoongi grinds down on Seokjin who’s already half hard and Seokjin sits up to kiss Yoongi deep and just happy. “I’m so glad you trust me enough for this.” He kisses again, “I’m so glad you trust our marriage enough for this.”
And Yoongi thinks he did the right thing.
They decide to tell Jungkook about their decision and even though they were both afraid, Jungkook is the opposite of it and yells at the top of his lungs until told to stop. The rest of their friends are even more ecstatic, Taehyung particularly the most out of all of them.
They try for about six months and neither of them complains because barebacking is fucking amazing. The seventh month is where Yoongi goes for his routine check up and comes home to look for Jungkook instead of Seokjin to plan a reveal.
Jungkook however throws all his plans out the window because his eyes go wide and he yells “I’m about to be an uncle.” and Seokjin comes out of the study to see Jungkook with his hands on his mouth and Yoongi with his hand on his forehead in disappointment.
Seokjin looks at Yoongi and gauges the reaction before asking, “Is he um- is he correct or has he lost his mind?”
Yoongi just rubs the back of his head with his gums on display and Seokjin comes running towards them lifting Yoongi off his feet and twirling him around like in all those movies Yoongi likes to watch but denies watching.
The pregnancy goes smoothly and Yoongi’s glad he has two people caring for him. Neither of them leave the house when the other is out and risk leaving Yoongi alone for even a minute and it gets on Yoongi’s nerves sometimes. One mishap is all it takes to make Yoongi realize they’re right to not leave him alone.
He’s in the third trimester and Seokjin’s taking a bath while Jungkook goes to answer the door for his pizza delivery. Yoongi doesn’t remember how it happened but he remembers getting nauseous in the middle of walking down the stairs when his grip on the railing became shaky and he fell. He remembers spiralling down the stairs and falling face first, since he used both his arms to cover his bump instead of using them to break the fall.
The pained yell he lets out causes Jungkook to leave the delivery guy hanging and run towards the sound but he reaches the foot of the stairs to find a wet, dripping and completely naked Seokjin already standing there, worried but level-headed, helping Yoongi up. Jungkook runs to call the ambulance and grabs a bathrobe to give to Seokjin, with the phone held between his ear and his shoulder.
Seokjin carries Yoongi to the bed until the doctor comes to declare he’s fine and so is their little one and prescribes some meds before leaving. As soon as the doctor is gone Yoongi gets an earful of scolding from Seokjin and to be honest he’s actually sorry.
He was told strictly to not take the stairs alone now that he was very pregnant and very vulnerable to injuries. He was told to call for either Seokjin or Jungkook if he wanted to use the stairs; both men very capable of picking him up and down the staircase. But he did so anyway and now he wasn’t hearing the end of it from Seokjin. It was actually Jungkook who came to his rescue telling Seokjin it was enough and might be stressful for him.
Later that night Seokjin lays in bed teary eyed and apologizing profusely for going off on Yoongi, kissing him head to toe with extra emphasis on his bump. Yoongi tries his best to let him know it’s not a big deal and besides Seokjin was in the right.
“I shouldn’t have yelled at you still.” Seokjin says lying with his head on Yoongi’s swell, “Stress is also bad for you and yelling at you was like warding off one danger to you with another.”
Yoongi runs his fingers through Seokjin’s hair as he sits up with a hand on his back for support before Seokjin notices and replaces Yoongi’s hand with his own, supporting him as he sits up. Yoongi takes both of Seokjin’s cheeks in his hands, smooshing them as he looks Seokjin in the eye. “Listen here. You were right. I did wrong. You both told me not to use the stairs and I did and god wanted me to suffer for being an obstinate asshole. Now shut up and kiss me.”
So Seokjin does exactly what he’s told, a hundred times over.
It’s around two weeks later that Yoongi goes into labor and Jungkook carries him to the car while Seokjin gets his wallet, his license, his medical cards and Yoongi’s medical files in a hurry.
Jungkook calls the rest of the gang on the way and Namjoon giggles as he hears Seokjin cooing comforting words to Yoongi in the background.
They arrive at the hospital and Yoongi’s admittance is a scene because Yoongi keeps insisting there is no need while Seokjin keeps insisting that he will accompany Yoongi into the room.
There’s little Yoongi can do to refute when he’s lying on a stretcher so Seokjin ends up holding Yoongi’s hand (and getting his own scratched and bitten) throughout the delivery of their adorable little baby boy.
Seokjin revels in the fact that he’s the first one to be able to hold the tiny wonder in his hands.
Yoongi keeps on complaining, asking to let him hold the kid because it was more his making than Seokjin’s but his rant stops mid-way as he notices Seokjin’s tears and his eyes soften looking at his husband holding his first-born.
“I know something went into your eye and you’re not crying but can I please hold my child now?”
On multiple protests from Yoongi and a little teasing on crying, Seokjin decides to lay the child next to Yoongi on his bed, deeming it a little dangerous to lay him on Yoongi’s lap considering the IVs.
Yoongi runs the back of his finger on the child’s cheek and whispers a small thank you to Seokjin. For giving Yoongi a life where he deemed himself safe and accepted enough to be able to live as he liked beyond the bounds of gender norms and sexual restrictions.
Which Seokjin rejects promptly and turns into a string of gratitude on his own part for giving Seokjin a life both metaphorically and now literally in the form of their little one.
Their moment however is disrupted by Jungkook who comes running inside to hold his nephew and teach him boxing as he says.
Yoongi keeps yelling from the bed on how “The kid is too small for boxing.”
And Jungkook keeps ignoring him and cooing at the baby “You wanna learn an uppercut first or a drop kick? Who’s the best boxer, yesh you are, oh yesh you are.”
Seokjin looks at the scene unfold, both Yoongi and Jungkook arguing, and he looks above, like he always does when he’s happy; with his eyes closed and a smile on his face. And he thanks the stars, the lords anything that's above (and Jungkook) for making him go to pride two and a half years ago. For there he bumped with a minty menace and he forever ruled his life thus.
Yoongi notices and calls Seokjin over to the bed. He places his lips on Seokjin's and kisses him slow and tiredly because of his lack of energy before he smiles through fresh tears, "I love you." and Seokjin said it right back without a second of thought.
Yoongi was glad he had found Seokjin, he was glad he had trusted Seokjin. He had never thought that someone with the same life choices as him could ever be lucky enough to meet someone like Seokjin but there was a rainbow at the end of his storms and he liked bathing in it much more than he did in his rains.
This is my first time ending a chaptered fic so I AM SORRY BUT I WILL IMPROVE I PROMISE.
Thank you for being with me through this 3 chaptered journey.
I dedicate this fic to my best friend for years Felix, who is also a trans male by birth and has learned to love life and live it well in acceptance :')