Blaine knew it wan't working, and it sucked. The thought of losing the love of his life haunted him. He always believed in soulmates, he believed Kurt was his, but he isn't so sure anymore. The longer they were together, the more they fought.
He knew it was hard for Kurt, who now was a famous Broadway star. He had shows almost every night, nights out with friends and his coworkers. He met other famous people and traveled the world for meet & greets. When he was out, Kurt never picked up his phone, and it reminded Blaine of when they were teenagers. But this time Blaine wouldn't cheat, he learned from mistakes, but he still felt lonely.
When he joined Kurt in traveling the world, he was excited. He always wanted to see the world, go to Paris or Amsterdam, but Kurt didn't have time for him. He was left alone in countries he had never been. At first he thought of it as an adventure, explore the world alone, but after a few weeks it got lonely.
Alcohol wan't the answer, Blaine knew that, but it didn't stop him. And no, it wasn't like he drank bottles of beer and scotch. The only alcohol in their house was wine, but just enough of it made him drunk anyway. Nights he spend alone, sitting on the ground and crying, surrounded with bottles of wine and broken wine glasses.
And then began the cheating. No, this time not on Blaine's side.
It started with Kurt keeping secrets, smiling at his phone and shutting Blaine out. Then Kurt didn't come home one night, saying he had an event with his coworkers, but he saw Rachel post about having a date night with her husband. Kurt came home the next day, love bites still fresh on his neck. He tried to cover it up with make-up, but Blaine still saw it.
He didn't mention it though, he only blamed himself, maybe he wasn't a good husband. He wasn't famous like Kurt, he tried to stay out of the media as much as possible. It's why they barely went on dates, Kurt was followed everywhere by paparazzi, they couldn't go on a movie date without the whole world knowing. Not that Kurt had time enough for dates.
Blaine thought he deserved it, for hooking up with Eli. For being interested in Sebastian and dating Karofsky after he and Kurt broke up years ago.
After a few weeks Kurt stopped hiding it, pictures of him and other famous actors were everywhere. They weren't evidence to the public for dating, but the marks on Kurt's body told him differently. He found Kurt's wedding ring in a drawer, he hadn't even noticed Kurt took it off. Sam had told Blaine many times to leave him, it wasn't healthy anymore, but leaving was hard.
Blaine didn't know if he would survive being alone, he wanted to wake up next to someone. Cook dinner for two persons.
Even Rachel tried to talk to Blaine, noticing what happened. She offered him a place to stay, Jesse wouldn't mind. Blaine declined, he denied the fact that Kurt cheated and told her to leave. He stopped talking to her, and everyone else after it. He locked himself inside the house, turned off his phone and started writing. Kurt didn't seem to notice, or he didn't care anymore.
Blaine barely ate, just enough not to get sick or pass out. He lived on wine and take out. He had to focus on writing so he wouldn't do anything stupid, so he wrote everything. He wrote fantasy stories, drew cartoons and wrote songs about how he felt.
Sam basically broke into his house a few days later. ("It isn't breaking in if I have a key, Blaine") He found him in the bedroom, and Blaine started crying as soon as he felt his best friend's strong arms wrap around him. And to be honest, Sam had no idea what to do in this situation, so he just held him. He cleaned up the house, threw away the wine bottles and made Blaine a normal meal.
Blaine didn't talk much, still not wanting the help, but he listened to his best friend anyway. He let Sam take care of him, the way Kurt should've.
"You need to promise me, Blaine," Sam said to him, "this isn't healthy, you need to leave Kurt. I know it's hard, but I will be here for you the whole time. So will Tina and even Rachel. I'm sure Santana will return to New York as soon as she knows what's going on. We will all help you and be there for you, but you need to take this big step, even though its scary."
Blaine couldn't do anything but nod, hope his best friend would leave him alone after that. But Sam didn't, he stayed with him, made him more food and talked to him. Blaine had to admit, having someone around felt good. He slowly started talking to Sam, his voice still raw from crying.
After two days, Kurt hadn't even returned home those nights, Sam convinced him to move out. He had found a small apartment they could rent together since Sam didn't live in New York. Rachel and Jesse helped them, and that surprised Blaine. He expected her to take Kurt's side, but she told him that she would always support Blaine. She hadn't even spoken to Kurt, besides their rehearsals for the Broadway show they were in together.
The next time Blaine saw Kurt, he still felt weak. He let Kurt yell at him for not telling him he was moving out, he almost wanted to grab his stuff and go back. He could hear Sam's voice tell him to stay strong, so he took a deep breath and chose to stand up for himself.
"I want a divorce."
Kurt stopped yelling, his mouth wide open in shock and his eyes angry. "Why? So you could ruin my reputation? You really think there's someone else out there who would love you like the love we had?"
Blaine shook his head, "No, this isn't love anymore, Kurt." And you ruined your reputation when you started cheating. Blaine thought, but didn't have enough courage to say it out loud.
He expected Kurt to argue, to yell at him, but all he got was, "Fine, but you'll hear from my lawyer." And the door slammed shut with a loud bang, making the picture frames shake on the wall. Blaine stood there for a few seconds before he left his- no, not longer his house. He hurried to his car and sat in it, staring out of the window. He knew he should feel happy, he would no longer be like this, he would be free and able to move on, but his heart broke even more. Kurt was his high school love, he wanted to prove people wrong and grow old with his first love. He wanted to make people believe in soulmates.
Sam made him go to therapy, telling him it would make him feel better, but it only made him feel worse. The thought of going to a therapist made him want to throw up, and as soon as she told him he had depression, he wanted to give up. But like Sam promised, he was there for him. He made sure Blaine went to the therapist, took his medicine and didn't do anything stupid. He called Santana, who lived in Los Angeles with her wife. She and Brittany had a dancing studio there with Mike.
She took a plane to New York as soon as she heard about it, promising them she knew a good lawyer.
Blaine looked up from his notebook, is therapist told him that writing was a good thing. She asked him to show some of his stories and songs, it showed his true feelings. He was just in the middle of a song when Santana knocked on his door.
She gives him a gentle smile before walking into his room, "The lawyer is going to be here in a few minutes."
He nods, wondering why she kept referring to him as 'the lawyer' instead of actually saying his name. He didn't ask though, he would probably know soon. She gives his hand a gentle squeeze before leaving his room. Blaine got up and looked into the mirror, he looked like a mess, even though he just showered. There are still bags underneath his eyes, slowly fading, but they were stil visible. His skin was pale and his lips chapped and dry. Even though he couldn't see it, Sam and Santana had told him that he was getting skinnier, but not in the good way. His hair was long and curly he didn't bother to use gel anymore. He was finally comfortable with his curls, and he didn't have the energy to do it. Or to do anything in general.
He shivers slightly and his heart starts to beat faster when he hears the doorbell ring. He felt nervous, talking to a- talking to his lawyer was the first step to the divorce. Even though it was a good decision, it was still scary.
He walks out of his room, tugging at the sleeves of his sweater and walks towards the living room. He can faintly hear Santana's voice by the front door and Sam gives him a comforting smile. "It'll be okay, Blaine. It's going to be tough, but it will all be okay in the end." Blaine almost smiled at him, he wanted to him, but he couldn't. Not yet.
The door opens and Blaine turns around to look at it. Santana was the first to enter the room, she's biting her lip to stop a small smile.
Then Sebastian Smythe walked in the room and Blaine really didn't know how to react. Sure, he forgave Sebastian years ago, but he hadn't talked to him since graduation. Sebastian looks different, older, of course. He has a serious expression on his face instead of the smirk Blaine was used to. When his green eyes landed on Blaine, Sebastian let out a sigh. "You really look like a mess, Killer." His voice was surprisingly gentle and slightly playful.
Sam looks at Santana, wanting a explanation. "A few months ago one of my students needed a lawyer, Britt and I helped her because she had no support from her parents. There we met Sebastian and we kept in contact ever since. And we won the case, by the way."
"If you're not okay with this, with me helping you, I can ask one of my friends to help you." Sebastian tells Blaine, but Blaine shakes his head. "No, no, it's okay."
"Am I the only one who can't wait until I see Kurt's reaction to this?" Santana asks and smirks at Sam, who lets out a sigh. "He won't be happy, which is why I think this is a good idea. Blaine, I know you don't want to hurt him, but you have to forget about Kurt's feelings for once and think about your own."
Blaine nods, knowing his best friend is right and takes a deep breath before looking at Sebastian. "Okay, let's do this."
Blaine slowly started to feel better, with both the help of his friends, Sebastian and his therapist. He still wasn't 100% okay, but he was getting there. He even opened up to Sebastian, who was there almost everyday now. He slowly told him everything that happened the last few years, how he slowly fell apart. Sebastian stayed professional and didn't make any comments about Kurt, even though Blaine knew that he still hated him. And he could see the hatred towards Kurt in Sebastian's eyes. Sebastian was gentle with him, he gave him time to open up and made sure he knew he didn't have to tell him anything he wasn't comfortable with yet. He explained what was going to happen, promised that he would be there as both a lawyer and a friend.
It was weird to be around him again, Blaine noticed how much he had changed. He was still sarcastic, he heard Sebastian and Santana's playful banter almost everyday. Sebastian was still interested in sports and music, admitted that he missed it sometimes.
But he also showed a more softer side, especially around Blaine. He guided him through panic attacks and respected every decision he made.
The day at court, Blaine almost didn't want to leave his bed. He knew there wouldn't be a lot of people, only close friends were there to supports the boys. A few of Kurt's new friends would be there, and he was pretty sure Puck and Mercedes were on Kurt's side as well.
His door opened and Sebastian walked into the room. Blaine looked up at him, he sat up against the wall and sighed. "I'm sorry."
Sebastian sits down on the end of the bed, "For what? It's okay to be nervous and scared."
"I'm not sure I can do this, Bas." The old nickname surprising both of them.
"You can, Blaine. You're strong and you have me and your friends with you. We all believe in you and that you're strong enough to do this. You're finally going to show Kurt that he doesn't own you, that you're capable of standing up for yourself."
Blaine stares at his hands, biting his lip to stop the tears falling from his eyes. Sebastian frowns and grabs Blaine's hand, making the curly haired man look at him. "I know you don't believe in yourself, Blaine, but it's all going to be okay. Scary, yes, you've been married to Kurt for 6 years or so, you've loved him and even though it was a toxic relationship, you also have good memories. Accepting that something is over is hard and people want to avoid it, but there will be more good moments. Maybe you'll find someone to make new memories with. This is the last step, and it's a big one. But you can do this."
Blaine wipes away the tears from his cheeks and nods, slowly getting out of the bed. Sebastian smiles at him, "Get ready. We're going to leave in an hour." He's about to pat his back, but Blaine pulls him in a hug. It's a short hug, but Blaine really needed it. Sebastian barely has time to wrap his arms around Blaine's shoulders when the shorter man pulls away. "Thank you."
Sebastian gives him another comforting smile before leaving his room. Blaine slowly gets ready, still nervous but no longer scared. He knows that his friends are gathered in their living room. He can hear Tina talk to Mike and Brittany. Jeff and Nick arrived yesterday and told him Trent would meet them at the court. Of course Santana and Sam were there, just like they promised. Rachel and Jesse were silent, but still there. It was hard for Rachel, just like Blaine she loved Kurt, and she too had problems with accepting the way Kurt was now. But she was still there for Blaine.
Blaine grabs his phone and sees that he has a few messages. He has 'good luck' text from Kitty, Marley, Unique, Jake and Ryder. Sugar had texted him a few hearts and Cooper told him he arrived in New York a few hours ago and would meet him there.
He takes a deep breath and doesn't bother looking in the mirror before getting out of his room. His friends give him gentle and supporting smiles and Sam pushes a plate with breakfast in his hands. Sebastian hands him a cup of coffee and Blaine just listens to his friends chatting about small things.
Time goes by too fast and they soon have to leave. They split up n a few groups, because Blaine's too nervous to drive, he got into Sebastian's car along with Sam and Jeff. He focuses on the music on the radio, repeating every word in his head just to keep himself grounded.
When they arrive at the court hall, Blaine is greeted by Trent and Cooper. Sebastian leads everyone inside and Blaine can feel Santana grab his hand. He hadn't seen her so nervous since she was outed in high school. Everyone sits down and Sebastian leads Blaine towards the front. Only a few minutes later Kurt arrives, Blaine can hear him gasp at the sigh of Sebastian, but the lawyer ignores him and looks through the files he has in front of him.
The day goes by slowly, Kurt is disagreeing with everything Blaine says, but the Judge can obviously see the unhappiness in Blaine's eyes. At the end, they both get divorce papers to sign, and Blaine finally feels better. His friends were right, it was scary, but it was worth it.
Santana's the first to hug Blaine as soon as it's over and Blaine can see Cooper giving Sebastian a 'bro-hug'. Sam just full on hugs the ex-warbler out of excitement, making Sebastian laugh slightly. Kurt glares at them but doesn't speak to them and walks away.
Rachel and Santana both agree that they should celebrate it and they're soon on their way to buy a cake. The others are on their way to Sam and Blaine's apartment. This time the ride back home is filled with Sam and Sebastian talking, now that he doesn't have to be professional anymore, Sebastian looks more comfortable talking about more personal topics. When they arrive, Sam and Nick walk immediately walk towards the apartment, leaving Sebastian and Blaine alone.
"Thank you, Sebastian." Blaine says as soon as he gets out of the car. "It's no problem, Blaine. It's my job, and I will always help you, even though we're not really good friends."
"I want you to be my friend, though." Blaine tells him, "I know you've changed and became a better person. I'd really like to get to know you better and be friends with you again." Sebastian smiles at him, for once not a comforting smile, but a genuine happy smile. "Yeah, okay."
Blaine smiles too, for the first time in awhile, and they both walk towards the building.
It's a few days later when Blaine calls Sebastian again, he took a few days to really realize what happened. Santana, Brittany, Cooper and Mike went back to LA, Nick, Trent and Jeff promised to keep in contact with him and Tina want back home too.
Sam had to go back to Lima soon, his vacation days were almost over and his job didn't pay enough to rent both his apartment in Lima and New York any longer. Blaine didn't mind, he knew he was ready to be alone again. Even though he wasn't going to be alone, Sebastian also lived in New York.
"Hey, Blaine, how are you?" Sebastian greets him when he picks up his phone. Blaine smiles softly, "I'm actually feeling good. Are you busy?"
"Not really, I just finished some paperwork, and I'm never too busy for you." Sebastian teased slightly, and Blaine could feel his cheeks heat up. Blaine knew Sebastian was just playfully flirting with him, but the attention made his feel happy.
"Maybe we can hang out, if you want." Blaine suggest, and he suddenly feels like a teenager again. Nervously waiting for a reply like a teenage girl talking to her crush. Or teenage boy, in his case. But he didn't have a crush on Sebastian.
And even if he did, it was too soon. He was just divorced and he needed time alone before he was going to focus on a relationship again. He needed to fully move on from everything that happened the past 6 years.
"Yeah, of course. I was actually thinking about grabbing some lunch at that small place close to your apartment, want to meet me there?" Sebastian answers, interrupting his thoughts. "Yeah, I'll see you there." Blaine says and they hang up.
Blaine grins and gets dressed in normal clothes, he was still wearing his sweatpants and a hoodie. He decided on something simple, it wasn't a date after all. It was cold outside, so he decided that a sweater would be perfect.
He ran his hands through his curly hair, it was getting a little too long and he reminded himself to get a haircut soon. He shouts a 'good bye' to Sam, who was playing videogames in his room, and left the apartment building.
Since the cafe he was meeting Sebastian was close to his apartment, he decided on walking. Blaine actually enjoyed the cold and hummed a song. As soon as he arrives a familiar car parks in front of it and Sebastian gets out. He isn't wearing a suit this time, and his hair isn't styled. He smiles at Blaine, and Blaine has to admit the other ex-warblers looks good.
As soon as they both sat down and ordered food, Blaine starts to relax. "So, when did you decide to become a lawyer?"
Sebastian doesn't look surprised by the question, he probably got it a lot. "My dad always wanted to be one, but I wasn't interested until after high school. At first wanted to become a lawyer because I felt guilty after what happened between us, but after awhile I started to enjoy it."
It probably wasn't the answer everyone got when they asked him.
"I'm proud of you." Blaine tells him, "And I've already forgiven you for that. The Warblers explained that it was an accident." Sebastian nods, not really wanting to talk about it, so Blaine changes the subject.
"Are you dating someone?"
This time Sebastian is surprised by the question, and before he can answer the waitress arrives and gives them the food they ordered. Blaine smiles at her before she leaves and focuses back on Sebastian.
"No, I'm not. I mean, I was, a year ago, but it wasn't really working." Sebastian tells him. "Oh?" Blaine thought Sebastian didn't do relationships, but apparently that has changed too.
"Yeah, I was surprised too when we started dating too." Sebastian laughs, "I felt like he was too good for me, he's a cop. He helped me in a case in LA and we started dating a few months later. But at some point we started to be more like brothers than lovers and we broke up. I got a job opportunity in New York and I moved here." Sebastian tells him, not looking uncomfortable with sharing his story.
"Do you still talk to him?" Blaine asks and takes a bite of his eggs. Sebastian shrugs, "Not really, when he was in New York visiting an old friend we talked for a few minutes, but besides that I haven't seen him."
Blaine nods as an answer and changes the subject again. They stay there for a few more hours, lunch soon turning into two drinks. They talk about small things, but it makes Blaine happy. Sebastian turned into an amazing man, and Blaine is proud to call him his friend.
"You need to call me, like, at least every week." Sam tells Blaine, making the shorter man laugh. "Okay."
"And promise me you won't do anything stupid, as soon as you're upset you need to call Rachel or Sebastian." Blaine nods, "Sam, you're going to be late."
"Yeah, yeah. Sorry." Sam pulls him in another hug, the third one today. "I'm proud of you, Blaine. And I'm going to miss you." Blaine smiles and hugs him back, "I'll miss you too, now go before you're too late."
He watches Sam open the front door and wave one last time. When the door closes, Blaine feels a little weird. It's now all officially over, it's been a few weeks since everything happened and he sometimes still felt like dreaming.
The doorbell rings and Blaine rolls his eyes. "Sam, really, I'll be fine - Oh, hey, Sebastian." Sebastian chuckles, "I saw Sam downstairs, he had a whole speech about looking after you." Blaine sighs and lets the taller man in. "I swear, he's more protective than my brother."
Sebastian hangs up his coat and smiles at him, "It's a good thing, Sam's a good friend and he cares about you." Blaine nods and walks back to the living room, "So, what's up?"
Sebastian shrugs, "I knew Sam was leaving today and I guessed you didn't want to be alone. I mean, I know you'll be fine, but maybe you'd like some company." They sit down on the couch, a little closer than normal and Blaine smiles at him, "That's sweet."
Also a new thing, Sebastian blushes slightly, and it's a beautiful sight.
"Want to watch a movie? Netflix has new Christmas movies." Blaine suggests. Sebastian laughs, "Blaine, it's November."
"It's never too early for Christmas movies, Bas." Blaine says to him and lets out a - very manly - giggle. Sebastian just grinned at him and let Blaine pick out a Christmas movie. Blaine moved a little closer and grabbed a blanket to cover both their legs. Their hands were touching, making both feel like teenagers again. Sebastian's hands were cold from being outside and Blaine grabbed them, warming them with his own warm hands. "You really should wear gloves, and a scarf, you're freezing."
Sebastian laughs and lets Blaine pull him as close as possible, "I'm used to the cold, Blaine."
Blaine shrugs and focuses on the movie with a small smile, caressing the top of Sebastian's cold hands with his thumbs. Sebastian, who's in a slightly uncomfortable position because Blaine is holding both of his hands, smiles and tries to focus on the movie too. He presses his cold nose against Blaine's cheek when he decides that the movie is too cheesy, making the other man jump in surprise.
"Do you want some coffee or tea? I can make hot chocolate." Blaine asks him, but Sebastian shakes his head. "I'm good. Maybe I just want some cuddles."
It's a joke, but he really doesn't mind Blaine wrapping himself around him, pushing him so he's laying on his back. Blaine rests his chin on Sebastian's chest, looking up at the taller man. Sebastian moves the soft blanket so it's covering Blaine.
"Do you think it's too soon?" Blaine aks him, and Sebastian looks confused. "Is what too soon? Watching Christmas movies?"
"No, I mean this, us, I..." Blaine blushes and hides his face in Sebastian's hoodie, "Is me liking you too soon?"
Sebastian lets out a sigh, and Blaine is scared he just ruined everything. "You weren't in love with Kurt before you got divorced, the divorce is just a piece of paper making it official. You can't control your feelings, Blaine."
It's a good answer, but it misses something Blaine hoped for. He doesn't know if it means Sebastian likes him back like that. Blaine looks up again to see Sebastian staring at him. He decides to take a risk and lean up so he's close enough to kiss him. He gives Sebastian a few seconds to move away, but he doesn't, so Blaine presses his lips softly against Sebastian's. Sebastian's arms wrap around his waist, pulling him close. The kiss is soft and sweet, and Blaine missed moments like this. He could only feel happiness and love inside him.
He pulls away and smiles at Sebastian before resting his head on his chest, turning back to the movie.