Actions

Work Header

Hopeless Case

Work Text:

fuck-this

It was a rather late evening. Standing at your window with a cup of tea you spotted Victor approaching your porch. Soon he was about to knock at your door and normally the thought of it would put the smile on your face, but not tonight. Tonight you were in a really shitty mood. Your day started quite nicely though. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, life was beautiful and all that… You felt this way because you were in love, there were no doubts about it. People in love are always happy and silly, until something finally brings them back to reality. In the morning you didn’t even think of it, you just enjoyed the feeling.

It was rather weird for you. Victor was problematic and you knew that. He never told you much about his problems though. But you knew he was a sex addict and definitely had a really complicated relationship with his mother. Both these things didn’t make him a perfect boyfriend material at all, but… You just liked him. A lot. Despite everything. And he seemed to like you as well. You were both lonely people, unlucky in previous relationships and starving for affection, so it seemed like you found each other at just the right time.

Today you had a day-off and for some reason you were in the mood to do something nice for Victor. You asked his best friend Denny what time his lunch break at work starts, prepared some food and by lunchtime time you arrived to that Colonial American village he worked in. You had to talk with some weird guy who seemed to be in charge and he looked kinda surprised to know that you were Victor’s girlfriend. He let you in though, after pointing out that the lunch break lasts only one hour, then you’d have to leave and he’d have to get back to work.

Victor was really surprised to see you (you were glad Denny didn’t spoil the surprise), his face lightened up at your sight. For you it was the best gift. You had lunch together, made a little picnic on the lawn and everything was perfect. But after you finished your meal and he already accompanied you to the exit, you ran into some girl, one of Victor’s colleagues.

- Hey, Victor! Why are you hanging around here with a visitor? Is this even allowed?

- Well, umm… - he stumbled.

- I am his girlfriend actually, - you said to her.

- Oh really? Is that true? – the girl cocked her eyebrow.

- Yes, she is, - Victor replied, hugging your waist. The girl chuckled mockingly.

- Okay, well… good for you.

She looked at you in such a sneering manner… And that was the moment your mood started getting worse. Victor pulled you closer, kissing your temple and you tried to smile at him like everything is fine, but something bothered you. Anyway, the lunch break was almost over and you wished him a nice working day and headed home.

You really tried to get the thought of that girl out of your head, but you just couldn’t. She looked at you as if she was laughing about how stupid you were… And you really felt stupid right now. Maybe even this idea to suddenly act like a caring girlfriend, who brings food to her boyfriend when he’s at work, was stupid? Plus, knowing about Victor’s addiction, you were sure that he fucked that chick. She actually looked quite slutty… What if he keeps doing it? No, no, it was wrong to think about it. You knew Victor tried really hard to sort his life out now. He continued attending the group therapy and actually he didn’t give you any reason to be jealous yet… But why the hell did that goddamn chick looked at you like that? And why did he stumble when she asked about you?..

These thoughts were driving you mad actually. Yes, you were probably overthinking. Unfortunately, you always tended to do so. But damn. Your mood was already completely and hopelessly spoiled.

And now, still standing at the window, you heard him knocking at your door.

***

Victor smiled at you as you opened the door and let him in. He leaned in to kiss you, but you pulled back and he frowned.

- Hey… what’s wrong? - he asked.

- I’m just not in the mood.

- Oh come on, y/n! A few hours ago you brought me lunch to work and looked quite happy. What happened now? Tell me.

Yes, he was right. You probably had to talk about it anyway.

- Well, it’s nothing really serious, but that girl we met at your work as I was leaving… Don’t get me wrong, but I think that maybe you should tell your colleagues that you have a girlfriend and it’s serious… Because it doesn’t feel very good when someone looks at you like that.

- Like what?

- Like I’m super dumb. And like “yeah, right, your girlfriend, I get it, haha”.

- Oh that… - Victor rolled his eyes. - Just don’t take it that seriously, y/n. She’s just a bit of a bitch, that’s all.

He tried to reach out and stroke your shoulder. It didn’t work.

- I’m actually trying really hard not to take it that seriously… But her look… And… I’m sure there was something between you two…

His expression tensed.

- Well yeah, there was something. There was sex between us two. I’m not gonna lie, because you know who I am, y/n. I’m sorry, but I can’t just go back in time and unfuck her! But I’m trying really hard to change for you, you know! Attending therapy and stuff… I’m trying! But as for my past – there’s nothing I can do about that!

- Victor, you don’t have to attend the therapy for me. You have to do it for you, because it’s you who needs this! Do you realize that?

- Of course I fucking realize! I just don’t get what else do you want from me?..

- Nothing really. I told you that maybe you should tell your colleagues about us. It kinda bothered me that you couldn’t tell it to her and I had to do it… I’m sorry, but it gives me some thoughts that I don’t quite like.

- You think we’re still fucking? So you don’t believe me?

- I really want to believe you, Victor, but… I don’t know. Why did you stumble?

- I don’t know, okay? You know, if you’re gonna be jealous about everyone I fucked in my goddamn life, than we better break up right now, because the list is kinda huge!

- I can understand, but…

- No, I think you can’t.

You realized that he was getting really mad. You both were speaking in a raised voice already.

- Okay, there’s no point in talking right now. We need to calm down, - you said.

Without waiting for his answer, you turned around and went to your bedroom. You got to the bathroom first to wash your face with cold water and take a deep breath. Then you lied on the bed. The thoughts kept bothering you. Maybe you were too hard on him? He really was trying his best… You sighed and closed your eyes. Your head was about to explode. “He’ll probably leave now,” - you thought. But no. You heard his footsteps in the living room, but you didn’t hear him shutting the door. He was still here.

***

You probably dozed off for a few minutes, but the sound of your bedroom door opening woke you up. You heard Victor’s footsteps behind you. He approached the bed and just lied down next to you, sighing deeply. For a couple of minutes both of you were just lying in silence. Then he reached your arm, stroking it gently with his fingertips.

You turned to your other side to face him and he looked at you softly, his eyes a little sore.

- Sorry for that, y/n… Such a dickhead like me doesn’t even deserve someone like you. 

- Don’t say that.

- But it’s true. I’m just a fucking pain in the ass with all my shit. I’m a hopeless case, I guess. I’m surprised that you still tolerate me, actually. And even bring me food to work.

- Hey… I’m sorry too, Victor. What happened today is not really your fault, I just… I always think too much…

- I didn’t sleep with anyone else since we got together. Do you believe me? – he kept looking into your eyes.

- I do.

- And I… I really don’t know why I stumbled, - he continued. - Probably it’s just still weird for me to have a girlfriend, not just casual sex partners…

- You’ll get used to it, - you replied, reaching out to stroke his cheek. He chuckled softly, moving closer to you and letting his fingers run through your hair.

- So you think I’m not completely hopeless?

- You’re not. Trust me.

- Okay, - he whispered and leaned in to kiss your lips.

Then you were just lying in bed, looking at each other and this moment was somehow really beautiful. Your fingers gently stroked his face, tracing his eyebrows and temples.

- What’s that with your ear? - you asked, as your fingertips reached the spot where a small part of flesh was missing.

- That’s a long story.

- You can tell me everything.

You caressed his damaged ear and after a pause Victor started talking. He began telling you a story from his childhood. About that one time his mother took him to the zoo. At night. The story sounded a bit crazy, but you listened to him carefully, sensing that he reveals to you something quite private. You were glad he told you about that. It was important.

You kept talking until really late and when your eyelids started getting heavy, he pulled you to his chest and you snuggled closer to him, enjoying warm comfort of his body.

“Fuck that chick. And fuck everyone and their opinion. We’re together, that’s the most important thing.” – it was your last thought before drifting off in peaceful sleep. Yes, you were in love with him and it was a hopeless case. But you could deal with it.