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the key to a healthy relationship is communication

Chapter Text

[6:12 pm]
[group chat 'all the family']

[tall baby has changed star child's name to tiny dolphin]

tiny dolphin: jisung
tiny dolphin: I will murder you.
tiny dolphin: painfully

sweetheart: no
sweetheart: no murdering
sweetheart: that's not healthy
sweetheart: taeyong back me up here pls

dad: i agree

[tall baby has changed dad's name to uncool dad]

uncool dad: y'know what
uncool dad: nevermind
uncool dad: do as you like chenle

sweetheart: NO

uncool dad: why did you only change my name
uncool dad: am i worse than kun???

tiny dolphin: yes

tall baby: yes

i'm the only ten you see: yes

here's Johnald: yes

uncool dad: i mean
uncool dad: that's true
uncool dad: kun's superior to all of us

sweetheart: THEN LISTEN TO ME AND DON'T MURDER ANYONE

tiny dolphin: do i have to
tiny dolphin: :c

sweetheart: yes

tiny dolphin: sigh
tiny dolphin: okay dad

[tall baby has changed sweetheart's name to cool dad]

uncool dad: that's fair

[cool dad has changed uncool dad's name to actual angel]

i'm the only ten you see: i think you just broke taeyong
i'm the only ten you see: we were cuddling and now he's frozen

here's Johnald: you were cuddling without me
here's Johnald: :(

Milky Boy: johnny
Milky Boy: shut the fuck up
Milky Boy: you're already cuddling with me

here's Johnald: ,,,,
here's Johnald: yeah but :((
here's Johnald: the four of us could've cuddled
here's Johnald: not just two pairs

Milky Boy: ...
Milky Boy: you were cuddling without us
Milky Boy: :(((

cool dad: i want to cuddle :(

Milky Boy: be right there

here's Johnald: be right there

i'm the only ten you see: be right there

actual angel: be right there

tiny dolphin: be right there

tall baby: be right there

cool dad: oh no
cool dad: what have i gotten myself into

actual angel: love

cool dad: that's fair

[7:02 pm]

rainbow demon: aw i missed the cuddling :(

country boy: i can come cuddle you, hyuck

rainbow demon: on the other hand
rainbow demon: cuddling sucks
rainbow demon: why would i want to do that lmao

country boy: :(

:D : i'll cuddle you mark
:D : uwu

country boy: on the other hand
country boy: cuddling sucks
country boy: why would i want to do that lmao

[:D has changed their name to :(]

rainbow demon: look what you did mark
rainbow demon: i'll cuddle you xuxi

[:( has changed their name to :D]

country boy: wow
country boy: i see how it is

rainbow demon: it's what you deserve
rainbow demon: bitch
rainbow demon: no one upsets xuxi

country boy: sadly yeehaws

actual angel: i've descended from heaven (the cuddle pile) to say that you have been disowned, mark
actual angel: mark lee?
actual angel: now just mark, no lee

country boy: YOU CAN'T TAKE AWAY MY SURNAME
country boy: YOU'RE NOT EVEN MY DAD
country boy: WE'RE DATING
country boy: THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS

actual angel: excuse me
actual angel: i am Both

country boy: so you haven't disowned me then
country boy: still my,,,,,, dad, i see

actual angel: f-fuck
actual angel: that's not
actual angel: no
actual angel: not what i meant
actual angel: shut up

Chapter Text

.[3:04 pm]
[group chat 'all the family']

dancy pants: i'm going out
dancy pants: y'all need something

demon rainbow: a will to live

rainbow demon: my childhood innocence

:D : your smile!!

dancy pants: yeah, i have like 4 dollars at most

sk8r boi: c̼̜͙̩̼͛̏̋̎̽́o͚͈̺̤̯͈̅f͂ͥ҉f̢̖̳̳͚͕̊̉̈̏̇̉e̺̳͇͍̖̭̺͒̓e͔̫̭͔͕

dancy pants: alright uwu loml

demon rainbow: disgusting

rainbow demon: says you
rainbow demon: cuddling me with all your might

demon rainbow: TRAITOR

rainbow demon: xuxi

:D : yeth

rainbow demon: i'm coming to cuddle you
rainbow demon: renjun just kicked me out of bed
rainbow demon: i'm not gonna stand for this violence against me>:(

:D : okay!!

demon rainbow: :(
demon rainbow: i'm thorry

:D : join us!!

demon rainbow: can i :(((

rainbow demon: ...yes
rainbow demon: i'm gonna be in the middle though

demon rainbow: okay uwu

[3:59 pm]

country boy: HOW DO I ALWAYS MISS CUDDLING TIMES

rainbow demon: thank god
rainbow demon: n0 0ne w@nt$ t0 cuddle y0u @nyw@y$

country boy: 1) rude
country boy: 2) i hate that i could actually read that

here's Johnald: don't be rude to mark
here's Johnald: mark's a sweetheart

country boy: thank u
country boy: love u

here's Johnald: love u too

rainbow demon: disgusting

demon rainbow: you're saying that
demon rainbow: while literally saying that you love xuxi
demon rainbow: and now the overgrown giant is crying

junguwu: oh
junguwu: don't make him cry
junguwu: why would you

demon rainbow: tell that to hyuck
demon rainbow: i, personally, think it's disgusting

rainbow demon: RENJUN
rainbow demon: YOU MADE HIM CRY FIRST

junguwu: :(

demon rainbow: NOT ON PURPOSE

rainbow demon: STILL DID

junguwu: poor xuxi
junguwu: why are you so keen on making my poor boyfriend cry

rainbow demon: i'm trying to get him to stop
rainbow demon: but when i try to comfort him
rainbow demon: he's just being loud
rainbow demon: and cries harder
rainbow demon: and says that he loves me and renjun "so much"
rainbow demon: he's now in the middle and being cuddled from both sides

junguwu: he does that
junguwu: he can't handle softness
junguwu: well
junguwu: he can't handle softness when it's given to him
junguwu: but he gives out a lot of Good Softness

rainbow demon: he does :((
rainbow demon: ur lucky
rainbow demon: xuxi's amazing

junguwu: he is :c
junguwu: you better cuddle him right

demon rainbow: we are
demon rainbow: oh no xuxi read what you said and now he's sobbing
demon rainbow: 'i love jungwoo so much'
demon rainbow: 'he's the best boyfriend i could ever ask for'
demon rainbow: 'i'm the one who's lucky to have him'
demon rainbow: 'does he even know how much i love him?'

junguwu: :ccc
junguwu: whose room are you in
junguwu: can i come over

demon rainbow: we're in xuxi's room
demon rainbow: come over
demon rainbow: i think he'll be more than just euphoric to see you

junguwu: okay
junguwu: i'll be right there

demon rainbow: okay

sk8r boi: so, like, is jeno getting me that coffee or not

demon rainbow: jaemin, stfu, we were having a soft xuxi moment

sk8r boi: >:(
sk8r boi: tell him i lov him

dancy pants: wow jaemin
dancy pants: ruining the moment
dancy pants: (yes i am btw)

sk8r boi: why is everyone so against me
sk8r boi: (thx)

dancy pants: it's what you deserve
dancy pants: (np)

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']

Night.Sky.Star1: yuta where did you put sicheng
Night.Sky.Star1: i miss my boyfriend
Night.Sky.Star1: :(

servant: what
servant: he said he was with you

Night.Sky.Star1: what
Night.Sky.Star1: he's not with me
Night.Sky.Star1: ???????
Night.Sky.Star1: (also pls change my screen name, i hate it)

servant: .
servant: where is sicheng
servant: (only if u change mine as well)

loselose: away from both of you monsters
loselose: you won't find me

servant: WHAT

Night.Sky.Star1: wHAT

loselose: shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
loselose: let me r e s t

servant: :(

Night.Sky.Star1: :(

loselose: don'T TRY TO GUILT ME INTO COMING TO BOTH OF YOU
loselose: i'm TIRED
loselose: i'm coming back only when i have planned the murder plan for both of you

Night.Sky.Star1: finally death
Night.Sky.Star1: bestow it upon me

[servant has changed Night.Sky.Star1's name to moonmoon]

[moonmoon has changed servant's name to winwin's stalker]

winwin's stalker: .
winwin's stalker: that's,,,, better

moonmoon: better AND accurate

loselose: yuta

winwin's stalker: yes my love

loselose: if i see you anywhere around me in these next few hours, i will throw a vase at you
loselose: with flowers in it
loselose: i'll aim for the head
loselose: bitch

winwin's stalker: :(
winwin's stalker: don't be mean to me
winwin's stalker: i love u

loselose: can't say the same
loselose: w
loselose: why tHE FUCK IS TAEIL HERE
loselose: I CAN SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
loselose: TAEIL GO THE FUCK AWAY
loselose: I'M GOING TO BARRICADE THE DOOR

winwin's stalker: TAEIL WHERE IS HE

moonmoon: KUN'S ROOM

loselose: NO I'M NOT
loselose: FUCK YOU
loselose: I'M NOT
loselose: GO AWSEU1,

moonmoon: YUTA I GOT HIM

winwin's stalker: COMING

demon rainbow: rip sicheng
demon rainbow: rip kun's room

rainbow demon: he loves the attention

loselose: no i don't

rainbow demon: sure you don't buddy sure you don't
rainbow demon: you love your boyfriends and you love the affection
rainbow demon: don't even try

loselose: .
loselose: perhaps
loselose: forget i ever said that
loselose: i hate them
loselose: love who
loselose: don't know hwter9

moonmoon: yuta got here and sicheng dropped his phone
moonmoon: he can actually type
moonmoon: sometimes

cool dad: so my room's occupied
cool dad: and i'm not going to join the disaster cuddle pile this time
cool dad: can someone take me in

rainbow demon: come to xuxi's room!!
rainbow demon: we're about to play monopoly and we're gonna need an adult that restrains renjun from choking one of us

demon rainbow: HEY
demon rainbow: don't be mean

rainbow demon: listen
rainbow demon: i'm talking from experience here

cool dad: that sounds fun, should i take some snacks?

rainbow demon: you're godsent
rainbow demon: yeth pleathe

cool dad: not if you type like that

rainbow demon: i'm sorry :c pls bring snacks

demon rainbow: kun
demon rainbow: did u know that you're my favourite person to ever exist

cool dad: no i'm not letting you choke donghyuck

demon rainbow: fuck

cool dad: LANGUAGE

demon rainbow: *blimey

cool dad: that's better

rainbow demon: that's so cursed
rainbow demon: renjun from this point on please only say fuck

demon rainbow: fuck

rainbow demon: that's better

cool dad: >:(

demon rainbow: b-bluck??

cool dad: i can accept that

rainbow demon: ,,,,
rainbow demon: okay

cool dad: okay
cool dad: so
cool dad: yuta, taeil
cool dad: don't kill sicheng
cool dad: hyuck, renjun, xuxi, i'm on my way

rainbow demon: yay!!

Chapter Text

[2:37 pm]
[group chat 'all the family']

sk8r boi: guys
sk8r boi: can you die of sugar overdose

dancy pants: you can die from anything if you try hard enough

sk8r boi: true
sk8r boi: i think donghyuck's trying to do that with his sugar consumption
sk8r boi: @rainbow demon why the fuck is your coffee so sweet
sk8r boi: it's disgusting

rainbow demon: it's like my soul uwu

sk8r boi: DISGUSTING

rainbow demon: are you saying my soul is disgusting :(

sk8r boi: yes

:D : don't be mean to hyuck >:(

rainbow demon: yeah don't be mean to me :(((
rainbow demon: i'll be sad

sk8r boi: it's not my fault you drink disgusting coffee and then call it the equivalent of ur soul

dancy pants: jaemin did you really just write the full word of 'equivalent' but had to shorten 'your'

sk8r boi: yes
sk8r boi: do you have a problem with that

dancy pants: in fact i do
dancy pants: fight me

sk8r boi: gladly
sk8r boi: you better square the fuck up before i circle you down
sk8r boi: bitch

dancy pants: is that supposed to make me scared
dancy pants: loser

rainbow demon: xuxi i don't think we're supposed to be here and watch this go down

:D : i vote we stay

rainbow demon: your wish is my command uwu

[sk8r boi has changed dancy pants' name to jeno is bad at kissing]

jeno is bad at kissing: YOU TAKE THAT BACK NOW

sk8r boi: no
sk8r boi: people deserve to know the truth

[jeno is bad at kissing has changed sk8r boi's name to jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight]

jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: no i'm not
jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: i have a bed of my own, jeno, i don't have to sleep with u >:(

jeno is bad at kissing: hahaha not really
jeno is bad at kissing: not anymore Bitch

jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: jeno what did you do

rainbow demon: ooooooooooooh
rainbow demon: what do you think he did, xuxi

:D : threw the matress out of a window?

rainbow demon: i'm saying the same

jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: hey hyuck
jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: can i sleep with u tonight uwu
jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: i know you like the cuddles :)

jeno is bad at kissing: hyuck no
jeno is bad at kissing: i'll give you as many cuddles and smooches as you want

rainbow demon: aaaaaaaaaaaaa
rainbow demon: please don't make me choose
rainbow demon: i'd like to be excluded from this narrative

jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: hyuckie :(( i will give you kisses and hugs :(( don't listen to jeno, he can't kiss anyways :((

jeno is bad at kissing: NO I'M NOT
jeno is bad at kissing: lee donghyuck
jeno is bad at kissing: i'm coming over to you and proving to you that i'm good at kissing
jeno is bad at kissing: even if you already know that

jaemin is sleeping on the floor: i'm gonna take your bed while you're at hyuck's

jeno is bad at kissing: nvm
jeno is bad at kissing: i'll prove it to you tomorrow

rainbow demon: you better
rainbow demon: i'm a sad, lonely gay, i need as much affection as you can give

jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: you should get a boyfriend

rainbow demon: :(
rainbow demon: i wish it was that easy
rainbow demon: HEY DOES ANYONE WANT TO DATE ME

country boy: yes
country boy: i mean
country boy: you're you
country boy: someone definitely wants to date you

rainbow demon: hahaha as if
rainbow demon: i wish
rainbow demon: wanna tell me an example
rainbow demon: 'cause i'd rly appreciate it, i'd love to finally get a boyfriend haha
rainbow demon: haha
rainbow demon: ha
rainbow demon: ha

jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: jeno and i are coming to cuddle you Right Now
jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight: no is not an acceptable answer

rainbow demon: :(
rainbow demon: i lov u guys

country boy: have fun, guys

Chapter Text

[group chat 'dreamies and a nightmare']
rainbow demon: fellas, is it gay to like guys

 

tall baby: not if you say no homo, bro

 

rainbow demon: i'd rather be gay

 

tiny dolphin: ooooooooooooooh
tiny dolphin: you say you like guys...
tiny dolphin: which we do already know, of course
tiny dolphin: but...
tiny dolphin: anyone in particular OwO

rainbow demon: uhhhh
rainbow demon: so how's the weather

tall baby: it's sunny, look out of the window
tall baby: oh wait
tall baby: you didn't mean literally

tiny dolphin: jisung
tiny dolphin: sometimes i really do wonder why i like you
tiny dolphin: dumbass

tall baby: hey, don't be mean to me :c

tiny dolphin: ANYWAYS
tiny dolphin: LEE DONGHYUCK
tiny dolphin: WHO'S THE LUCKY GUY

rainbow demon: no one
rainbow demon: i just looked at my reflection
rainbow demon: only remembered now that it's actually me haha
rainbow demon: thought i saw another hot guy
rainbow demon: turns out it was just me y'know
rainbow demon: #hotpeoplestruggles lol

demon rainbow: someone please change my screen name, i refuse to be matching with someone who says haha and lol

tiny dolphin: suffer, bitch

tall baby: suffer bitch

tiny dolphin: ugh jisung our minds

tall baby: why are you saying ugh
tall baby: our minds are great, not ugh

tiny dolphin: i-
tiny dolphin: i need a new boyfriend, mine lacks brain cells
tiny dolphin: hyuck wanna have a crush on me instead of whoever you have it now
tiny dolphin: we can uhh date

rainbow demon: sorry i'm not into fetuses

tiny dolphin: HEY
tiny dolphin: ONLY ONE YEAR DIFFERENCE
tiny dolphin: AND I'M TALLER THAN YOU
tiny dolphin: THAT'S UNFAIR

rainbow demon: as i was saying
rainbow demon: i'm not into fetuses

tall baby: if chenle's a fetus, what am i

rainbow demon: ur an embryo

tall baby: two to eight weeks after fertilization
tall baby: the time my brain cells peaked
tall baby: miss those times
tall baby: shoutout to mum and dad for giving me those 46 chromosomes
tall baby: lov u

tiny dolphin: excuse my boyfriend
tiny dolphin: he's been studying for his upcoming test
tiny dolphin: i've been telling him to not update me on what he has found out
tiny dolphin: as you can see, he isn't listening to me
tiny dolphin: as always

demon rainbow: sigh
demon rainbow: i hate this fucking family

rainbow demon: wanna hear good news

demon rainbow: what

rainbow demon: we aren't a family

demon rainbow: yeah but friend group doesn't have the ring to it
demon rainbow: but thank god
demon rainbow: if we were, it'd be pretty weird if i liked [redacted]

tiny dolphin: RENJUN HAS A CRUSH TOO
tiny dolphin: WHO WHO WHO WHO WHO
tiny dolphin: WHEN DID EVERYONE GET CRUSHES

demon rainbow: i'm not telling smh

tiny dolphin: AND WHY IS NO ONE TELLING ANYONE
tiny dolphin: wait
tiny dolphin: my brain cells just came to tell me something
tiny dolphin: YOU LIKE SOMEONE IN THE GROUP
tiny dolphin: BOTH OF YOU
tiny dolphin: SJDKSJDKSJ GUSSHYDD
tiny dolphin: GUSYD
tiny dolphin: GUYS
tiny dolphin: WHO

demon rainbow: so, donghyuck, how's your day going so far

rainbow demon: it's been pretty good actually, how about you, dear friend?

tiny dolphin: DON'T IGNORE ME

demon rainbow: oh, me too, mate
demon rainbow: have any plans?

rainbow demon: yeah i'm gonna practice some of the dances, then rest

tiny dolphin: YOU CAN'T IGNORE ME

demon rainbow: sounds fun
demon rainbow: can i join you

tiny dolphin: RENJUN
tiny dolphin: DONGHYUCK
tiny dolphin: WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN

[tiny dolphin has added cool dad to 'dreamies and a nightmare']

tiny dolphin: dad
tiny dolphin: donghyuck and renjun are being mean to me
tiny dolphin: tell them to stop :(

cool dad: renjun, donghyuck, pls don't be mean to chenle
cool dad: he's a small child
cool dad: small children shouldn't have to experience The Mean

rainbow demon: he wanted to get information out of us >:(
rainbow demon: and renjun and i don't want to share it

cool dad: oh worm
cool dad: what information

tall baby: donghyuck and renjun have crushes on someone in the group but they weren't telling chenle on who
tall baby: and so they ignored him and had a conversation of their own instead

cool dad: i see
cool dad: chenle, sweetheart, maybe renjun and donghyuck aren't ready to tell who they like
cool dad: and that's completely okay
cool dad: remember back when you were just crushing on jisung
cool dad: and came ranting to me about him in chinese
cool dad: but weren't ready to tell anyone else yet
cool dad: hyuckie and junnie feel the same now

tiny dolphin: .
tiny dolphin: eye c
tiny dolphin: okay dad
tiny dolphin: thank u
tiny dolphin: you have opened my eyes
tiny dolphin: i'm sorry guys :(

cool dad: i suppose i'll leave you kids to your own devices

rainbow demon: thank u kun

demon rainbow: farewell kun

cool dad: uwu

[cool dad has left 'dreamies and a nightmare']

demon rainbow: hey hyuck
demon rainbow: are you actually going to go practising

rainbow demon: yeah
rainbow demon: if i can get up from bed

demon rainbow: i'm gonna come with you then

rainbow demon: oh, alright
rainbow demon: see you in uhh fifteen?

demon rainbow: sure
demon rainbow: want some coffee?

rainbow demon: you know it

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[7:04 pm]

rainbow demon: hey guys
rainbow demon: renjun and i kinda have an announcement

country boy: should we be scared

rainbow demon: uhhhh doubt that

country boy: what's the announcement

demon rainbow: we're dating

rainbow demon: HEY I WANTED TO BE THE ONE TO TELL

country boy: oh
country boy: i'm happy for you two!

rainbow demon: do we have ur blessing

tiny dolphin: SO YOU HAD CRUSHES ON EACH OTHER
tiny dolphin: YOU COULD'VE STARTED DATING SO MUCH EARLIER IF ONLY YOU HAD TOLD IN THE GC

demon rainbow: 1) literally 4 hour difference

rainbow demon: 2) we didn't have crushes on each other

tiny dolphin: what
tiny dolphin: if you didn't have crushes on each other
tiny dolphin: then how
tiny dolphin: why
tiny dolphin: what

tall baby: chenle's head is imploding

rainbow demon: seems like it
rainbow demon: where did mark go
rainbow demon: do we have his blessing in the end or not

demon rainbow: nothing can stop our love
demon rainbow: we don't have to get anyone's blessing to be in love

rainbow demon: you're disgusting

demon rainbow: if it makes you feel better, i literally gagged while typing that

rainbow demon: oh so that was the weird sound i heard

:D : I'M HAPPY FOR U GUYS
:D : TINY BOYFRIENDS
:D : THAT'S SO CUTE

junguwu: you two go well together!!

rainbow demon: thank u!!
rainbow demon: love u guys

demon rainbow: but not as much as you love me, right owo

rainbow demon: is it too early to break up now

demon rainbow: yes

rainbow demon: shit
rainbow demon: well then
rainbow demon: the answer to your question:
rainbow demon: of course not, my love, i could never love anyone as much as i love you, my sweetheart, the reason i live, the oxygen i breathe

demon rainbow: NO GO BACK
demon rainbow: DON'T BE LIKE THAT
demon rainbow: FUCK
demon rainbow: WHAT HAVE I STARTED

rainbow demon: suffer

demon rainbow: i- i am

actual angel: aww
actual angel: i wasn't expecting you two to get together
actual angel: but now that i think of it, you go together really well
actual angel: happy for you!!

demon rainbow: thank you !! uwu

cool dad: that's so cute
cool dad: you guys are cute :')
cool dad: i'm turning old and sappy
cool dad: but i'm happy for you two as well!!
cool dad: seems like you're going to be a lovely couple

rainbow demon: renjun hold me i'm cry
rainbow demon: thank u kun

rabbit(ch): i shipped you ever since i read that you two teamed up and made xuxi cry out of softness
rabbit(ch): i knew you were destined for great things
rabbit(ch): one of them being this relationship

demon rainbow: IF ALL OF YOU COULD STOP MAKING HYUCK CRY WITH SOFTNESS, THAT'D BE GREAT

rainbow demon: hey don't expose me
rainbow demon: i just poked myself in the eye
rainbow demon: oh look renjun also poked himself in the eye
rainbow demon: aren't we just a clumsy couple
rainbow demon: omg i love saying that
rainbow demon: renjun i'm gonna be a sappy bitch and scream me and MY BOYFRIEND or MY BOYFRIEND and i every time i talk about you
rainbow demon: that feels rly nice
rainbow demon: oh no renjun poked both of his eyes
rainbow demon: i'm gonna be right back
rainbow demon: gotta kiss it better hehe

tall baby: chenle kiss me if i'm wrong but kissing an eye would be rly nice

tiny dolphin: omg how did you know my kink

tall baby: ...
tall baby: boyfriend applications open - preferably someone who wants to kiss me, but anyone who isn't chenle will do

rabbit(ch): sorry, no one except for chenle is interested in embryos
rabbit(ch): suffer
rabbit(ch): adore our new couple
rabbit(ch): which one of you unborn children is going to be the flower boy at their wedding

tiny dolphin: me
tiny dolphin: i'm cuter
tiny dolphin: jisung would just look like a walking lamp post on the aisle

tall baby: HEY
tall baby: at least someone could SEE me
tall baby: otherwise they're gonna have to look through binoculars to notice you
tall baby: ur tiny

tiny dolphin: EXCUSE ME
tiny dolphin: NO I'M NOT
tiny dolphin: I'M TALL

here's Johnald: you're both tiny, shut up
here's Johnald: also nice @ renjun and donghyuck!!

rainbow demon: uwu

demon rainbow: uwu
demon rainbow: we're gonna watch some movies and then sleep
demon rainbow: so goodnight guys
demon rainbow: love u

rainbow demon: goodnight pals!!
rainbow demon: may u have just as good of an evening as i do hehe
rainbow demon: lov u

Chapter Text

[private chat with country boy]
[10:11 am]

rainbow demon: hey
rainbow demon: markly
rainbow demon: wanna hang out today? we haven't done anything together in so long
rainbow demon: i miss you

country boy: hey
country boy: i'm kinda busy today actually
country boy: i'm sorry

rainbow demon: some other day maybe?

country boy: yeah, of course

rainbow demon: okay
rainbow demon: love you!!

country boy: ilyt

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[10:20 pm]

rainbow demon: hey, junnie, do you have anything planned today

demon rainbow: jeno and jaemin asked me to come to their dance practice so i can look and point out mistakes 'cause they might not notice
demon rainbow: wanna come with me?

rainbow demon: sounds fun!!

demon rainbow: i assure you, it's not
demon rainbow: i have suffered through their dance practices enough to know that it's actually torture
demon rainbow: you know what jeno and jaemin are like
demon rainbow: jaemin can and will use every opportunity to make out with jeno whenever they are close enough in the choreo
demon rainbow: and the make out sessions can be,,, ten minutes long and it's Disgusting

rainbow demon: hehe
rainbow demon: but now
rainbow demon: we can make out too
rainbow demon: and be just as disgusting

demon rainbow: lee donghyuck
demon rainbow: your MIND
demon rainbow: love it
demon rainbow: that's the best idea you've ever had
demon rainbow: right after our idea of dating
demon rainbow: i'm giving you half credit there

rainbow demon: come and get this phat KITH
rainbow demon: i need affection >:( YOUR affection

demon rainbow: i'll tell jeno and jaemin that i'll be a bit late and we can walk together?
demon rainbow: get some coffee on the way
demon rainbow: something like that?

rainbow demon: perfect
rainbow demon: when are we going?

demon rainbow: do fifteen minutes sound good?
demon rainbow: i still have to get dressed and then walk to you

rainbow demon: yeah
rainbow demon: can't wait to see u

demon rainbow: uwu

rainbow demon: go get ready, bub
rainbow demon: i'm gonna change, too

demon rainbow: okay
demon rainbow: see you soon

[group chat 'all the family']
[10:53 am]

[jeno is bad at kissing has changed jaemin is sleeping on the floor tonight's name to sk8r boi]
[sk8r boi has changed jeno is bad at kissing's name to dancy pants]

sk8r boi: i know i said that i was happy for renjun and hyuck but they're actually horrible and i hate them

:D : hey, don't be mean to the tiny boyfriends

sk8r boi: they're being disgusting and i don't approve of that

dancy pants: yeah, they keep making out all the time
dancy pants: they fell on the floor at least three times

sk8r boi: they're the worst
sk8r boi: i hoped renjun would help us out in the dance practice
sk8r boi: but all i hear is hyuck laughing and them making out
sk8r boi: DISGUSTING

demon rainbow: UMMMM
demon rainbow: LISTEN UP YOU RAT
demon rainbow: I HAD TO LOOK AT YOU AND JENO MAKING OUT EVERY TIME YOU WERE IN A 30CM RADIUS OF EACH OTHER FOR TEN MINUTES STRAIGHT EVERY TIME I CAME TO WATCH YOU GUYS DANCE
demon rainbow: DON'T COMPLAIN
demon rainbow: bitch

sk8r boi: we're not that bad

dancy pants: ...
dancy pants: renjun's right
dancy pants: we are just that bad, nana
dancy pants: BUT
dancy pants: i also have good news
dancy pants: we aren't the worst couple anymore

sk8r boi: oh no we have competition now
sk8r boi: jeno quick do something disgusting we can't lose our postition as The Worst

dancy pants: jaemin no
dancy pants: pls let us get away from our bad reputation
dancy pants: we could be one of the non-disgusting pleasant couples

sk8r boi: no
sk8r boi: ffs i have to do everything myself in this house

dancy pants: no
dancy pants: nana go away
dancy pants: no i don't know what ur gonna do but stop now i beg of you

demon rainbow: donghyuck
demon rainbow: can we pls leave
demon rainbow: five more minutes and i'm going to choke both of them
demon rainbow: and if jeno starts crying, only two

rainbow demon: let's go
rainbow demon: 'my rose petal'
rainbow demon: 'my angel'
rainbow demon: 'my will to live'
rainbow demon: jaemin is the worst

demon rainbow: oh no jeno started crying from the softness, let's run

rainbow demon: let's run and never attempt to be as disgusting as jaemin
rainbow demon: firstly, we won't even be able to do that
rainbow demon: secondly, that's just,,,, revolting
rainbow demon: ew

demon rainbow: ugh i love when we think the same things, babe

Chapter Text

[private chat with country boy]
[2:54 pm]

rainbow demon: been a while
rainbow demon: is it possible that you're free sometime soon?

country boy: i don't know hyuck
country boy: i barely know what i'm gonna do in 5 minutes
country boy: sorry
country boy: some other day?

rainbow demon: yeah
rainbow demon: no worries
rainbow demon: don't overwork yourself, love you

country boy: i won't

 

[private chat with :D]
[3:03 pm]

country boy: hey
country boy: wanna hang out

:D : sure!! when?

country boy: today?

:D : sounds great!! wanna watch a movie? jungwoo said that he didn't want to watch it 'cause he was scared and i don't want to make him watch it, he's been having nightmares
:D : but i do want to see it

country boy: sure
country boy: i'll get some snacks

:D : okay!! i'm gonna take my laptop, i can be there in twenty?

country boy: alright, can't wait!! don't knock, just come in

:D : sure thing uwu

 

[private chat with actual angel]
[3:41 pm]

rainbow demon: hey, yong

actual angel: ah my favourite son
actual angel: to what do i owe the honour

rainbow demon: sjdksj lov u
rainbow demon: i actually wanted to talk about mark

actual angel: what about him

rainbow demon: he's hasn't been busy these days, has he?

actual angel: our schedule's pretty light now, you know that
actual angel: and he hasn't had any extra things as far as i know
actual angel: he's actually cuddling with xuxi and watching a film right now
actual angel: he came out to get some snacks a few minutes ago

rainbow demon: oh

actual angel: why do you ask?

rainbow demon: no reason
rainbow demon: just wanted to know
rainbow demon: i've been busy with renjun and stuff so i just wanted to know how he's dojng
rainbow demon: and he didn't replu to me
rainbow demon: but i guess he was watching somehting with xuxi haha

actual angel: oh?
actual angel: i can tell him to answer to you if you want me to

rainbow demon: no, no
rainbow demon: no worries
rainbow demon: let them watcht he move in peace
rainbow demon: he'll reply later haha

actual angel: okay

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]

rainbow demon: renjun pleasr cme over
rainbow demon: pleads

demon rainbow: is everything okay??

rainbow demon: no
rainbow demon: please fome
rainbow demon: i'm hyperventialting

demon rainbow: i'll be right there, baby
demon rainbow: stay online please

rainbow demon: okay

demon rainbow: try to stabilize your breathing okay
demon rainbow: in for four seconds
demon rainbow: hold for seven
demon rainbow: out for eight
demon rainbow: can you do that for me, sweetheart?

rainbow demon: yeah it hink so

demon rainbow: okay
demon rainbow demon: breathe like that, sweetheart
demon rainbow: i'll be there in a bit, okay?

rainbow demon: okay
rainbow demon: please hury

demon rainbow: i am, don't worry
demon rainbow: just breathe, baby

Chapter Text

[11:34 pm]
[group chat 'all the family']

junguwu: henlo

:D : MY ANGEL IS HERE
:D : HI
:D : I LOVE YOU BABY

junguwu: hi xuxi
junguwu: i love you, too

:D : AAAAAAAAAA
:D : i'm in lov with u

junguwu: why aren't you sleeping yet, bub

:D : don't feel like it

junguwu: it's late already

:D : you aren't sleeping yet either >:(

junguwu: i was
junguwu: i just woke up

:D : why

junguwu: i had a nightmare

:D : wHAT
:D : I'M COMING OVER RIGHT NOW
:D : AND THEN WE'RE GONNA SLEEP

junguwu: you don't have to, love
junguwu: it's okay

:D : NO
:D : I'M ON MY WAY

junguwu: okay
junguwu: thank you
junguwu: i love you

:D : i love you more

junguwu: impossible

 

[12:21 am]
[private chat with country boy]

:D : mark
:D : are you awake

country boy: yeah
country boy: what's up, bro

:D : i might have a slight problem

country boy: what is it

:D : y'know how i'm with jungwoo?

country boy: just in general
country boy: or, like, now?

:D : yes

country boy: continue

:D : okay
:D : so
:D : i have realized that
:D : i also have a crush on hyuck

country boy: oh

:D : but i'm still in love with jungwoo
:D : and hyuck is with renjun now

country boy: polyamory
country boy: we do have our polyamorous elders and well,,, our polyamorous me
country boy: what is the problem

:D : i don't want to lose jungwoo
:D : i love him
:D : so much

country boy: he wouldn't break up with you just because you also like hyuckie
country boy: jungwoo's definitely not against polyamory

:D : he might not be against it
:D : but he might not want to, like, actively participate in it,,,,,

country boy: he doesn't mind you cuddling with hyuck
country boy: he doesn't mind you being with hyuck all the time
country boy: he won't mind it
country boy: talk to him about it
country boy: he loves you
country boy: you love him
country boy: he'll understand

:D : you think so?

country boy: i'm sure

:D : what about renjun

country boy: he won't mind either
country boy: hyuck and renjun said themselves that originally they didn't even have crushes on each other
country boy: and crushes don't go away that fast
country boy: so i'm sure that both of them like each other but also like someone else

:D : fair point
:D : okay
:D : i'll talk about it with jungwoo tomorrow
:D : thank you so much
:D : i love you

country boy: no problem

Chapter Text

[2:45 am]
[private chat with actual angel]

junguwu: tae?

actual angel: hi
actual angel: why are you still awake?

junguwu: i couldn't sleep
junguwu: i was... thinking
junguwu: and reached the conclusion that i have a problem
junguwu: and i think your input could help?

actual angel: do tell then
actual angel: i'd be glad to help

junguwu: thank you

actual angel: no problem uwu
actual angel: now spill

junguwu: okay
junguwu: you and i'm pretty sure everyone else knows that i'm very deeply in love with xuxi
junguwu: but
junguwu: i think something's changed?
junguwu: not in my feelings
junguwu: in his

actual angel: what do you mean, love?

junguwu: i don't know
junguwu: i think...
junguwu: he might be cheating?

actual angel: oh wow
actual angel: that was unexpected
actual angel: but go on

junguwu: i don't know
junguwu: he hasn't been spending as much time with me anymore
junguwu: it's always donghyuck and/or mark
junguwu: don't get me wrong
junguwu: i don't blame donghyuck or mark at all
junguwu: and i don't blame xuxi either
junguwu: i'm just... confused
junguwu: and i feel guilty
junguwu: both because i could even think that
junguwu: and...
junguwu: i also have a crush on someone else
junguwu: i still love xuxi with all my heart
junguwu: i just,, also like another person

actual angel: that's okay
actual angel: polyamory exists
actual angel: you know that
actual angel: xuxi also knows that, love
actual angel: and he's definitely not cheating on you
actual angel: he's too hopelessly in love with you
actual angel: he might like someone else alongside with you
actual angel: but he's definitely not cheating on you, sweetheart
actual angel: don't feel guilty about it
actual angel: and don't connect liking another person to cheating, cheating's doing something behind their partner's back
actual angel: liking another while not acting on it or talking about it with your partner and agreeing on how your relationship works while not overstepping the boundary isn't cheating
actual angel: so just talk to xuxi about it
actual angel: the key in a relationship is communication
actual angel: okay?

junguwu: okay
junguwu: i'll talk to him
junguwu: thank you
junguwu: i love you so much

actual angel: i love you too, bub
actual angel: try to get some sleep now, okay?

junguwu: i will
junguwu: you too

actual angel: goodnight

junguwu: goodnight

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[4:19 pm]

junguwu: hey xuxi

:D : hi!!

junguwu: y'know how we both can't do serious conversations eye to eye...

:D : yeah
:D : oh no do we have to have a serious conversation

junguwu: i think so

:D : okay
:D : what is it

junguwu: i like someone else

:D : oh

junguwu: wait shit don't get me wrong
junguwu: i love you!!
junguwu: and have never stopped!!
junguwu: and never ever will
junguwu: it's just that i've recently realised that i also like someone

:D : OH
:D : okay
:D : i do too
:D : who do you like

junguwu: doyoung
junguwu: you?

:D : donghyuck

junguwu: is it okay with you that i like doyoung?

:D : of course, love
:D : is it okay with you that i like hyuck?

junguwu: yeah

:D : okay
:D : i'm glad we talked about this
:D : i actually wanted to message you about the same thing

junguwu: oh really

:D : yeah
:D : i asked mark yesterday what to do
:D : because i was nervous
:D : and had no idea what to do
:D : and he told me to talk to you

junguwu: oh
junguwu: i talked to taeyong yesterday night about the same thing
junguwu: because i was feeling the same
junguwu: so i'm really glad we talked too
junguwu: though i do have another question

:D : what is it, angel

junguwu: don't take it the wrong way please
junguwu: but you haven't... had anything with hyuck yet, right

:D : no
:D : we've cuddled but that's all
:D : he doesn't know i like him either

junguwu: okay
junguwu: thank you
junguwu: i'm sorry i had to ask
junguwu: i just wanted to make sure

:D : it's okay angel
:D : i love you

junguwu: i love you, too

:D : what are we going to do about our... crushes?

junguwu: i don't know
junguwu: you should confess to hyuckie

:D : you should confess to doyoung as well
:D : i'll think about telling hyuck
:D : he just got in a relationship
:D : i should let them settle down before telling him

junguwu: okay
junguwu: i'll think about telling doyoung as well

:D : you should, angel
:D : you're wonderful
:D : and i'm pretty sure he likes you too

junguwu: why do you think so

:D : trust your boyfriend's intuition

junguwu: last time my boyfriend's intuition got us lost in the city
junguwu: i don't trust it anymore

:D : no, that was your boyfriend's stubbornness talking then
:D : this is the actual intuition speaking

junguwu: fair enough
junguwu: i'll think about it uwu

:D : okay uwu
:D : where are you
:D : i miss u
:D : and i want a kiss :(

junguwu: i'm in my room
junguwu: about to shower actually

:D : oh in that case i'll be right there
:D : i'll join you

junguwu: join me as in the room or the shower?

:D : yes

junguwu: hurry then

:D : already am

Chapter Text

[5:45 am]
[group chat "kun's boyfies"]

sweetheart: hi
sweetheart: daily morning reminder that i love you all more than anything
sweetheart: and i'm making pancakes for breakfast
sweetheart: first come, first served (best served)

[7:21 am]

actual angel: good morning
actual angel: i love you more

sweetheart: impossible
sweetheart: come get breakfast
sweetheart: i'll make you some coffee

actual angel: THANK YOU
actual angel: I HAVEN'T SLEPT NORMALLY THE WHOLE NIGHT
actual angel: MWAH

sweetheart: come give me that mwah irl

actual angel: on my h*ccing way

sweetheart: uwu

[7:40 am]

actual angel: man, y'all are missing out by sleeping
actual angel: the pancakes? best thing i've ever eaten
actual angel: the kisses kun gives out? the best thing ever in general

i'm the only ten you see: on my fucking way
i'm the only ten you see: tae, make me a coffee please uwu

actual angel: okay

i'm the only ten you see: thank you uwu

[8:03 am]

i'm the only ten you see: man, y'all are REALLY fucking missing out by sleeping
i'm the only ten you see: this morning? best morning
i'm the only ten you see: suddenly i don't regret being awake this early

Milky Boy: i'm waking up johnny and we're going to the kitchen
Milky Boy: can we get coffee too uwu

i'm the only ten you see: no

actual angel: yes

i'm the only ten you see: traitor

actual angel: wow. you really went there
actual angel: fight me
actual angel: NO DON'T ACTUALLY

sweetheart: for those wondering, they started making out
sweetheart: i made you coffees and put pancakes on your plates, so get here faster before everything goes cold
sweetheart: and someone should tell the dreamies+xuxi+jungwoo that breakfast's ready

country boy: i'll tell everyone

sweetheart: thank you, love
sweetheart: come get breakfast

country boy: i'm not really hungry, sorry
country boy: i'll eat later
country boy: thank you, though
country boy: love you

sweetheart: is everything okay?

country boy: yeah, everything's fine uwu

sweetheart: okay
sweetheart: then tell everyone else please

country boy: i will uwu

 

[chat 'dreamies and a nightmare']
[8:10 am]

country boy: hey y'all
country boy: kun made breakfast
country boy: yukhei, tell jungwoo, too

rainbow demon: don't call him yukhei
rainbow demon: that sounds so wrong

demon rainbow: go to sleep
demon rainbow: oh wait
demon rainbow: kun made breakfast
demon rainbow: what did he make

country boy: pancakes

demon rainbow: OMFW
demon rainbow: TELL SOMEONE TO MAKE ME A COFFEE

rainbow demon: mark
rainbow demon: are you already there?

country boy: no

rainbow demon: wanna go with me

country boy: not hungry

rainbow demon: oh okay

demon rainbow: jeno and jaemin are getting ready rn
demon rainbow: go with them, i'm already on my way

rainbow demon: can you make me some coffee, junnie

demon rainbow: yeah, i'm gonna be making some for jaemin as well

rainbow demon: thank u

demon rainbow: no problem, babe

Chapter Text

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[10:21 am]

rainbow demon: hey

demon rainbow: hi uwu

rainbow demon: remember the panic attack i had the other day

demon rainbow: yeah
demon rainbow: is everything alright?

rainbow demon: yeah i'm fine now don't worry uwu
rainbow demon: i said that i'd tell you what it was about later
rainbow demon: so i guess this is the later

demon rainbow: you don't have to tell me anything if you don't want to, sweetheart

rainbow demon: it's okay
rainbow demon: you should know

demon rainbow: okay
demon rainbow: then do tell

rainbow demon: so
rainbow demon: you know how i have that crush on mark
rainbow demon: and how we are rly good friends
rainbow demon: or were i guess

demon rainbow: yeah
demon rainbow: wait why were
demon rainbow: what happened

rainbow demon: that's the thing
rainbow demon: i have no fucking idea
rainbow demon: he just
rainbow demon: started avoiding me
rainbow demon: i haven't seen him in literal weeks

demon rainbow: is he busy?

rainbow demon: that's what he says
rainbow demon: but the other day when i asked him to hang out and he said that he was busy
rainbow demon: i texted taeyong
rainbow demon: 'cause i was concerned, y'know?
rainbow demon: and i kinda had a suspicion that he,,, wasn't actually as busy as he was saying
rainbow demon: and taeyong confirmed my suspicion
rainbow demon: literally like half an hour after i asked him if he wanted to hang out and he said that he was busy
rainbow demon: he was cuddling with xuxi and watching a film

demon rainbow: baby :((

rainbow demon: and it's okay if he doesn't want to hang out
rainbow demon: that's normal i don't mind
rainbow demon: there are days i don't want to see anyone either i understand that
rainbow demon: but i haven't seen him in weeks, junnie
rainbow demon: it fucking hurts
rainbow demon: and i don't understand where i went wrong
rainbow demon: what did i do
rainbow demon: why have i lost my best friend

demon rainbow: do you want me to come over, sweetheart?

rainbow demon: please do

demon rainbow: i'll be right there, hold on

rainbow demon: thank you
rainbow demon: i love you so much

demon rainbow: i love you too baby

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[8:09 pm]

actual angel: hi
actual angel: are you free

cool dad: yeah, of course, love
cool dad: what is it

actual angel: i wanted to talk about mark
actual angel: i'm worried about him

cool dad: so i'm not the only one that sees it
cool dad: i am, too

actual angel: i think on top of just being constantly... sad, he's also been avoiding donghyuck
actual angel: he messaged me the day xuxi came over to mark and asked if he was busy
actual angel: and hyuck knows our schedule
actual angel: i mean
actual angel: he lives by it as well
actual angel: so that kinda seemed weird

cool dad: oh no
cool dad: mark doesn't avoid donghyuck
cool dad: remember when he was sick and donghyuck didn't know and texted him to come over and he almost did?
cool dad: he loves him

actual angel: exactly
actual angel: mark wouldn't just avoid donghyuck

cool dad: wait
cool dad: that's exactly it
cool dad: mark would avoid donghyuck

actual angel: what why

cool dad: 'cause that's what he does to all his crushes
cool dad: denies them until something happens

actual angel: OH
actual angel: fuck
actual angel: i remember him skipping practice just so he wouldn't have to see me

cool dad: yeah and he skipped meals to not see me

actual angel: this is both good and bad news
actual angel: we know what's wrong
actual angel: but we can't really do anything about it
actual angel: we can't make donghyuck suddenly be into mark when he has just gotten in a relationship
actual angel: we don't even know if he's poly

cool dad: didn't he and renjun have different crushes before they started dating
cool dad: it could be mark
cool dad: or, well, at least, kinda show that's he's not not poly

actual angel: we should talk to mark
actual angel: i don't want to see him so sad anymore

cool dad: i agree
cool dad: he should tell hyuck

 

[actual angel has created a group chat '.']
[actual angel added cool dad and country boy]

country boy: what's this

actual angel: hey sweetheart
actual angel: kun and i wanted to talk to you

country boy: about what

cool dad: what has been on your mind lately
cool dad: you have been looking... sad lately
cool dad: we're worried

country boy: oh i'm just tired haha
country boy: been staying up later

actual angel: baby we know that's not true
actual angel: it's about hyuckie

country boy: what about him

cool dad: mark, bub, it's evident you like him
cool dad: please don't avoid him
cool dad: avoiding didn't help before
cool dad: it's really not going to help now, honey

country boy: i'm not avoiding him haha

actual angel: baby...
actual angel: please don't lie
actual angel: we only want what's best for you
actual angel: you know that
actual angel: tell hyuck that you like him
actual angel: it'll make you feel better
actual angel: and hyuck too
actual angel: you two haven't hung out in ages, he's probably wondering what's happened

country boy: ican't
country boy: i can't do that

actual angel: why not

country boy: he doesn't like me back
country boy: he just got in a relationship with renjun
country boy: he might not even be poly
country boy: it'd be unfair to renjun if i told him
country boy: it'd be unfair to xuxi if i told him
country boy: i can't do that

cool dad: where does xuxi play into this

country boy: shit
country boy: ignore that
country boy: just ignore everything
country boy: i'll deal with everything in my own time and in my own wayscountry boy: just let me, okay

cool dad: you're hurting yourself like that

country boy: it's fine
country boy: i'm fine
country boy: i'll get over it
country boy: i don't want to hurt hyuck or xuxi or renjun
country boy: it's okay

actual angel: do you want me and kun to come cuddle you baby
actual angel: we don't have to talk about it anymore for now

country boy: yes please

cool dad: we'll be right there honey

Chapter Text

[group chat 'dreamies and a nightmare']
[9:21 am]

dancy pants: hey guys
dancy pants: wanna hang out today
dancy pants: jaemin and i are tired of each other y'know
dancy pants: gotta get some other people in our lives

sk8r boi: jeno shut the fuck up
sk8r boi: we'd still be hanging out

dancy pants: let me be dramatic

country boy: i think i'm free

rainbow demon: renjunnie and i are free too!!

tiny dolphin: i'm gonna get jisung out of bed and we're free too

country boy: wait shit
country boy: i forgot i had to do something
country boy: sorry
country boy: i can't today :( have fun guys!!

tiny dolphin: :(

rainbow demon: what the fuck is your problem mark

country boy: what

rainbow demon: don't even what now
rainbow demon: you know what the fuck i'm talking about
rainbow demon: i haven't seen you in literal weeks
rainbow demon: you've been avoiding me all the fucking time
rainbow demon: and now suddenly when i say that i can hang out today you can't anymore? how fucking convenient isn't it

country boy: it's not like that hyuck
country boy: i've really been busy

rainbow demon: yeah you were really fucking busy cuddling with xuxi the other day
rainbow demon: we have the same fucking schedule mark you might be busier than me but not that busy to not be able to see me for weeks at a time

sk8r boi: hey hyuck... tone it down a bit?

rainbow demon: and i get it, you might not want to hang out with me all the time and i don't mind that
rainbow demon: no jaemin i won't tone it fucking down, i'm mad
rainbow demon: i'm fucking mad and i have to get this off my chest
rainbow demon: as i was fucking saying
rainbow demon: you might not want to hang out with me all the time
rainbow demon: and that's okay
rainbow demon: i understand, i don't always want to hang around my friends either
rainbow demon: but it's been weeks mark
rainbow demon: weeks
rainbow demon: i don't get it
rainbow demon: did i do something wrong
rainbow demon: because i really don't get it
rainbow demon: i thought we were friends?? good friends?? but now it looks like i've been wrong all this time?

country boy: you didn't do anything wrong
country boy: i'm sorry

rainbow demon: do you have an actual reason for avoiding me then

country boy: i'm sorry

rainbow demon: that's not what i was fucking asking

country boy: i can't tell you
country boy: i'm so sorry, hyuck

rainbow demon: oh put your sorry up your fucking ass
rainbow demon: i don't need it
rainbow demon: i need my best fucking friend back
rainbow demon: i honestly can't fucking believe i liked you
rainbow demon: and i can't believe that i still fucking do
rainbow demon: fuck this

country boy: hyuck

rainbow demon: no
rainbow demon: this is all
rainbow demon: i said everything i had to say
rainbow demon: you said that you didn't have a reason and that you 'can't tell me'
rainbow demon: so i'm not gonna listen to anything anymore

[rainbow demon has left the chat]

Chapter Text

[group chat 'kun's boyfies']
[9:47 am]

country boy: can soemone please come oevr
country boy: pleaes

actual angel: i'll be right there
actual angel: breathe sweetheart
actual angel: do that for me?

country boy: okya
country boy: please hurry

actual angel: i'm almost there baby
actual angel: almost there

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]

demon rainbow: baby
demon rainbow: do you want me to come over
demon rainbow: hyuckie

rainbow demon: not now
rainbow demon: i'm sorry

demon rainbow: it's okay, bub
demon rainbow: text me if you want me to get you anything or to come over
demon rainbow: okay?

rainbow demon: k

 

[private chat with cool dad]

actual angel: come to mark's room when you get back
actual angel: lunch can wait
actual angel: mark can't

cool dad: what happened? is he okay?

actual angel: he and donghyuck argued
actual angel: really bad
actual angel: he was having a panic attack
actual angel: i got him to calm down
actual angel: he's still crying though
actual angel: it hurts to see him like this

cool dad: i'll be there as soon as i can
cool dad: can you tell me what happened?

actual angel: donghyuck noticed how much mark has been avoiding him
actual angel: and got mad at mark
actual angel: really mad
actual angel: 'put your sorry up your fucking ass'
actual angel: that mad
actual angel: and then donghyuck said that he can't believe how he liked mark and how/why he still does
actual angel: and left the group chat before mark could explain

cool dad: oh no
cool dad: i'll be there soon
cool dad: and they had that conversation in a group chat??
cool dad: which one??

actual angel: yeah
actual angel: the one with dreamies and xuxi

cool dad: fuck
cool dad: how is he holding up

actual angel: crying still
actual angel: i'm hugging him rn so he doesn't see that i'm on the phone

cool dad: okay
cool dad: we should probably talk to hyuck as well later

actual angel: later
actual angel: renjun's probably with him now

cool dad: true
cool dad: i'll be there in five

actual angel: okay
actual angel: mark needs the both of us now
actual angel: should i text johnny as well

cool dad: i think you should ask mark
cool dad: he might not want too many people
cool dad: two is already a lot at moments like these

actual angel: okay

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]

:D : hey hyuckie
:D : i'm sorry
:D : i didn't know that mark had told you that he was busy that day

rainbow demon: not your fault
rainbow demon: it's okay

:D : still
:D : i'm sorry :(
read: 10:22 am

 

[private chat with sk8r boi]

rainbow demon: i'm sorry for being rude to you in the gc
rainbow demon: i didn't mean to
rainbow demon: i'm really sorry

sk8r boi: it's alright don't worry about it
sk8r boi: are you okay, though?
read: 10:28 am

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[11:08 am]

junguwu: hey hyuckie
junguwu: xuxi told me what happened
junguwu: i hope you're feeling okay, sweetheart
junguwu: if you need anyone to cuddle you or listen, i'm here for you

rainbow demon: thank you
rainbow demon: i really appreciate it
rainbow demon: i'm okay, though, don't worry

junguwu: okay sweetheart
junguwu: please tell if i can do anything for you
read: 11:13 am

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[11;14 am]

rainbow demon: hey junnie

demon rainbow: hey baby
demon rainbow: do you need anything?

rainbow demon: no, it's alright
rainbow demon: i just wanted to say that i love you
rainbow demon: a lot
rainbow demon: and i appreciate you so so much
rainbow demon: you're such an angel
rainbow demon: i'm so lucky to have you

demon rainbow: baby
demon rainbow: i love you too
demon rainbow: do you want me to come over

rainbow demon: no not now
rainbow demon: i just wanted to tell you

demon rainbow: can i come see you for at least a minute
demon rainbow: i just want to make sure you're okay
demon rainbow: i'll leave then

rainbow demon: okay

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[11:47 am]

demon rainbow: kun
demon rainbow: i know you're probably with mark right now
demon rainbow: but i kinda need help
demon rainbow: i can't deal with him alone as much as i want to

cool dad: why, what's happening?

demon rainbow: he just
demon rainbow: he's rly drunk already
demon rainbow: i have no idea where he got the alcohol
demon rainbow: he seemed fine when we texted
demon rainbow: but when i came over, he had a panic attack
demon rainbow: and now he's still sobbing
demon rainbow: i can't even understand what he's saying anymore
demon rainbow: he's sobbing and his speech is too slurred
demon rainbow: i just really think that
demon rainbow: i don't know, an adult could help better?

cool dad: i'll come over, mark fell asleep because he cried too much as well
cool dad: i have to wait until johnny gets here because we don't want to leave mark alone and taeyong left a little bit ago

demon rainbow: okay
demon rainbow: thank you

cool dad: don’t let him drink anymore

demon rainbow: i won’t
demon rainbow: i put the bottle away already

cool dad: that’s good
cool dad: and make sure he’s breathing normally

Chapter Text

[actual angel has created a group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[actual angel added here's Johnald and cool dad]

actual angel: how are they doing

here's Johnald: mark woke up for a bit but went back to sleep

cool dad: renjun here, kun told me to take the phone
cool dad: he's still trying to calm hyuckie down
cool dad: he had another panic attack and he's refusing the calming meds kun offered

actual angel: shit

here's Johnald: crying should tire him out soon, though
here's Johnald: he'll fall asleep soon

actual angel: at least that
actual angel: they need to talk
actual angel: they just need to talk

here's Johnald: only now i think neither of them will want that
here's Johnald: hyuck already said what he had to say and now he's just gonna wait on mark
here's Johnald: but mark's not the one to make the first move
here's Johnald: especially now

actual angel: that's true
actual angel: mark prefers to avoid his problems until they go away themselves

cool dad: but hyuck wants to talk to mark
cool dad: he stilll likes him a lot
cool dad: even if he's mad and hurt right now
cool dad: can't you tell that to mark?

actual angel: one thing is telling him
actual angel: the other is making him act on it
actual angel: mark doesn't... act on his problems

cool dad: donghyuck is not a problem, taeyong

actual angel: i know sweetie
actual angel: wrong word choice
actual angel: what i meant to say is that mark's too anxious to act on whatever is bothering him
actual angel: he thinks that he'd hurt you and hyuck even more by talking to him
actual angel: the 'better off without me' thing again

here's Johnald: sigh
here's Johnald: mark keeps talking and shivering in sleep

actual angel: hug him and get another blanket

here's Johnald: i am and i already did

actual angel: okay, then just stay like that
actual angel: tell me when he wakes up, i'll bring chocolate or something

here's Johnald: i will

cool dad: shit donghyuck passed out
cool dad: i gotta go help kun get him to bed

actual angel: fuck okay
actual angel: good luck
actual angel: keep me updated please
actual angel: both of you

here's Johnald: i will

Chapter Text

[group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[4:51 pm]

here's Johnald: hey
here's Johnald: mark woke up just now

actual angel: how's he feeling
actual angel: does he want anything
actual angel: we have chocolate
actual angel: i can make him some hot cocoa
actual angel: bring lunch
actual angel: anything
actual angel: pls ask him

here's Johnald: he said that he doesn't want anything

actual angel: :c

here's Johnald: he asked if you can come over though
here's Johnald: he said that he wants both of his sides cuddled

actual angel: omw
actual angel: i'll be right there

here's Johnald: @cool dad anything about hyuck?

cool dad: he's been awake for a while now
cool dad: but i'm not there anymore
cool dad: hyuck apologized profusely but asked me to leave him with renjun alone
cool dad: he seemed to be okay
cool dad: i told renjun to text/call me if something happens and he promised he would
cool dad: is mark feeling alright?
cool dad: should i come over?

actual angel: he's still a bit hazy from sleeping right now
actual angel: but yeah, come over, i think he'd feel better if you were here
actual angel: you're a v calming person

here's Johnald: ^ agreed

cool dad: kjsdkj thank u
cool dad: i'm coming over then, i'll text renjun while i'm on my way

actual angel: okay, tell us how he's doing

cool dad: okay

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]

cool dad: hey
cool dad: how's hyuckie doing

demon rainbow: he's... just sad
demon rainbow: we're cuddling rn
demon rainbow: hasn't said a word since you left except for asking me to cuddle him
demon rainbow: he seems really anxious still
demon rainbow: he was picking at my skin for a while but then stopped and now is just holding my hand
demon rainbow: but i think he's not on the verge of a panic attack anymore at least

cool dad: okay
cool dad: that's the best we can get out of the situation i guess
cool dad: taeyong said that we have chocolate and cocoa so ask hyuck if he wants any
cool dad: if he does, you can ask xuxi or jungwoo to bring it to you
cool dad: shouldn't leave him alone today
cool dad: taeyong or i will bring you guys dinner later as well

demon rainbow: okay, i'll ask him
demon rainbow: and thank you
demon rainbow: i appreciate it a lot
demon rainbow: how's mark doing

cool dad: he only woke up a few minutes ago
cool dad: seems to be doing better than before
cool dad: isn't crying or panicking at least

demon rainbow: i'm glad
demon rainbow: i hope he feels better soon
demon rainbow: okay i gtg now hyuck wants to talk

cool dad: keep me updated if anything happens

demon rainbow: will do

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]

i'm the only ten you see: i'm stealing your boyfriend
i'm the only ten you see: i need someone enormous to cuddle me and he lives up to my standards
i'm the only ten you see: i'll return him either in a few hours or one (1) business day
i'm the only ten you see: nice doing business with you, pardner

junguwu: i
junguwu: alright
junguwu: make sure to feed him, though

i'm the only ten you see: if he deserves it, sure

junguwu: HEY
junguwu: FEED MY BOYFRIEND >:(

i'm the only ten you see: woah okay now i'm scared you never use caps lock
i'm the only ten you see: i'll feed him

junguwu: good >:c

i'm the only ten you see: thanks for letting me borrow him

junguwu: as long as you return him to me

i'm the only ten you see: as if i could stand him for any longer than a cuddling session

junguwu: don't say mean things about xuxi :( he's wonderful

i'm the only ten you see: i know
i'm the only ten you see: that's how i show love

 

[private chat with :D]

i'm the only ten you see: hey xuxi
i'm the only ten you see: i talked with jungwoo and he said that i could borrow you for a cuddling session
i'm the only ten you see: so if you don't mind... come over please?

:D : i'll be there uwu
:D : you never want to cuddle me, has something happened? :(

i'm the only ten you see: can't i cuddle you without a reason
i'm the only ten you see: appreciate this opportunity, it's not gonna happen again
i'm the only ten you see: one time offer

:D : should i take snacks before i come

i'm the only ten you see: heck yeck
i'm the only ten you see: you better

:D : alrighty uwu

 

[private chat with here's Johnald]

i'm the only ten you see: hey
i'm the only ten you see: i know you're with mark right now, you don't have to answer, i just wanted to say that i love you a lot, even if i don't say it too much
i'm the only ten you see: i was thinking today
i'm the only ten you see: and i remember how you tried to make me feel better the day i came out as agender
i'm the only ten you see: using and thinking of new gender neutral terms for everything
i'm the only ten you see: and it honestly just made me feel so good then and even now
i'm the only ten you see: so thank you
i'm the only ten you see: i really really love you
i'm the only ten you see: i wouldn't have been able to ask for anyone better than you
i'm the only ten you see: and dw i'm not sad even if i sound like it
i'm the only ten you see: i asked xuxi to cuddle me
i'm the only ten you see: so take care of mark, i hope he feels better soon
i'm the only ten you see: tell me if there's anything i can do for him

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[8:44 am]

cool dad: breakfast's ready

demon rainbow: hyuck and i aren't coming
demon rainbow: he said he isn't hungry

cool dad: i'll still bring something to you guys
cool dad: i'm sure you guys want to eat
cool dad: did he eat dinner yesterday?

demon rainbow: no, he only took a few pieces of chocolate

cool dad: sigh
cool dad: okay, i'll bring something sweet for hyuck and breakfast for you

demon rainbow: you don't have to bring anything for me
demon rainbow: i'm alright, not hungry

cool dad: renjun
cool dad: i'm going to bring you breakfast
cool dad: whether you want it or not
cool dad: 'cause you have to eat
cool dad: understand

demon rainbow: sigh
demon rainbow: okay dad

cool dad: that's better
cool dad: i'll be there in a few

demon rainbow: alright

 

[group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[9:31 am]

cool dad: hey guys
cool dad: i think one of us should be with hyuck instead of renjun?
cool dad: i get that donghyuck and renjun are dating and donghyuck feels good with renjun being there
cool dad: but it's bad for junnie
cool dad: he already has blue circles and he hadn't eaten dinner yesterday either
cool dad: and he refused breakfast`

actual angel: yeah
actual angel: i know there isn't a huge difference in our ages
actual angel: but it's still evident
actual angel: so renjun should get his rest
actual angel: he can come over
actual angel: but shouldn't stay over at night, worrying about hyuck and not being able to sleep

here's Johnald: i think you're the closest with hyuck, taeyong

actual angel: yeah i think so too
actual angel: but i'm still gonna need kun's help to talk with renjun because i doubt he'll want to listen to me when i say that he should go

cool dad: we shouldn't do it out loud though
cool dad: hyuck might hear and overthink it as him being burdensome to renjun

actual angel: hm yeah
actual angel: should one of us message him
actual angel: or just add him to this gc and talk to him?

cool dad: i think we should add him here
cool dad: he'd be calmer too 'cause he'd get updates even when he's not there as well

actual angel: yeah alright

[actual angel added demon rainbow]

cool dad: hey junnie
cool dad: listen, sweetheart
cool dad: we were thinking that one of us should be with hyuck instead

demon rainbow: what why no

actual angel: it'd be better for you, love
actual angel: it's stressing you out as well

demon rainbow: no i'm fine
demon rainbow: i have to be with hyuck

cool dad: you haven't eaten
cool dad: and you haven't slept
cool dad: sweetheart, donghyuck sees that as well
cool dad: and he won't be feeling better from seeing you tired and hungry

demon rainbow: i'll eat
demon rainbow: and i have gone without sleep for days before, i'll be fine

cool dad: renjun, this really isn't a debate, sweetheart
cool dad: taeyongie will go to hyuck
cool dad: you'll be in this gc and know everything that we know
cool dad: taeyong will keep us updated, right?

actual angel: yeah of course
actual angel: and you'll still come over, it's just that most of the time i'll take care of him
actual angel: you have to sleep and eat so by trying to help hyuck you don't ruin yourself, okay?

demon rainbow: i don't want to leave him

actual angel: it'll be okay, sweetheart, i'll take care of him
actual angel: i'll update you

demon rainbow: okay

actual angel: i'll be there in five then

demon rainbow: okay

 

[private chat with sk8r boi]

actual angel: hey jaemin
actual angel: if you don't have anything to do now/later
actual angel: it'd be great if you could go check up on junnie
actual angel: maybe take jeno with you and cuddle him?

sk8r boi: yeah of course
sk8r boi: we'll be there

actual angel: thank you

Chapter Text

[group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[10:11 am]

actual angel: i got hyuck to eat
actual angel: @cool dad he said that breakfast was tasty
actual angel: and he also drank the tea, so that's good

cool dad: tell him thanks

actual angel: okay
actual angel: how's mark

cool dad: better
cool dad: johnny went to see ten for a few minutes 'cause they were being soft yesterday but he couldn't reply
cool dad: so now we're cuddling
cool dad: he seems much calmer than before
cool dad: so i'm glad about that
cool dad: we'll get him out of bed tomorrow, i think

actual angel: that's good
actual angel: i'm glad
actual angel: i think hyuck's gonna leave the room tomorrow as well
actual angel: he does need some time to rest still, he's quite shaken
actual angel: he asked how mark was...

cool dad: oh
cool dad: what did you say

actual angel: i said that he was upset
actual angel: but didn't go into detail
actual angel: that'd make him feel even worse
actual angel: he'd feel guilty as fuck if i told him that mark had a panic attack and that he cried until fell asleep
actual angel: so i thought that not telling him would be better

cool dad: yeah, that's smart
cool dad: they can talk it out between themselves later
cool dad: when they feel better

actual angel: yeah that's what i was thinking

cool dad: wait i have to go mark wants to talk i'll ttyl

actual angel: okay, ily

 

[10:48 am]

cool dad: he almost cried again
cool dad: he literally asked me "do you think i fucked up"
cool dad: not only about hyuck
cool dad: he thinks that all of dream & xuxi think bad about him
cool dad: and i have no idea how to convince him otherwise
cool dad: because i know it's not true but how do i make him believe it

actual angel: shit
actual angel: ask xuxi to come over? that's the most positive energy i can think of

cool dad: tried that
cool dad: he's busy
cool dad: he said that he'd come in evening, though
cool dad: but that's evening
cool dad: it's morning now

demon rainbow: i can come over
demon rainbow: i don't know if i'm... the best person to come since i'm hyuck's boyfriend but at the same time i think that'd also help him understand that if even i'm not mad at him then no one in that gc is
demon rainbow: well
demon rainbow: except for hyuck but i doubt that even he is mad, more just upset than angry

cool dad: that's a good idea but you still haven't got your rest, junnie
cool dad: you need to sleep, sweetheart

demon rainbow: i'm really fine, jaemin gave me his coffee, which was horrible and bitter, and i doubt i'm ever going to sleep again
demon rainbow: so i really can come over
demon rainbow: if no one minds, of course

actual angel: i think he should go, kun
actual angel: who else would convince him better than renjun
actual angel: since he should be "on hyuck's side" even if there are no actual sides to this

cool dad: alright
cool dad: but you're going to sleep immediately afterwards

demon rainbow: okay
demon rainbow: i'm coming then

 

[12:18 pm]

cool dad: getting renjun here was a good idea
cool dad: they talked
cool dad: not about hyuck but just in general
cool dad: now mark doesn't think that dream hates him anymore
cool dad: and renjun fell asleep next to mark
cool dad: and because mark is easily influenced, he's sleeping now too

actual angel: that's nice
actual angel: hyuck doesn't look like he's slept much
actual angel: can't blame him, i haven't either
actual angel: i hope he sleeps tonight though
actual angel: he still has a dance practice in two days to go to unfortunately

cool dad: he'll sleep
cool dad: he's calmer now, isn't he

actual angel: yeah he is
actual angel: i really hope so

Chapter Text

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[7:39 pm]

rainbow demon: hey
rainbow demon: i kinda had a question

demon rainbow: what is it, love

rainbow demon: when you finally date jaemin and jeno
rainbow demon: and you will
rainbow demon: you like them and it's obvious they like you as well
rainbow demon: what will happen to us

demon rainbow: what do you mean, sweetheart

rainbow demon: like
rainbow demon: are we still gonna be a thing
rainbow demon: or is it just going to be you three

demon rainbow: hyuckie
demon rainbow: i love you, okay

rainbow demon: that doesn't answer my question though

demon rainbow: i'd love for all four of us to be a thing someday
demon rainbow: if that's... okay with you?
demon rainbow: because i don't want to lose you

rainbow demon: okay
rainbow demon: i love you
rainbow demon: so much
rainbow demon: i'm sorry i had to ask
rainbow demon: i love you

demon rainbow: it's okay baby
demon rainbow: i love you too
demon rainbow: a lot
demon rainbow: get some rest now, alright?

rainbow demon: okay
rainbow demon: i will
rainbow demon: you too
rainbow demon: do you think we could hang out tomorrow
rainbow demon: we as in you, i, jaemin, and jeno
rainbow demon: i think it'd be good if i didn't stay indoors all the time

demon rainbow: of course, sweetheart
demon rainbow: should i ask them?

rainbow demon: yeah

demon rainbow: okay

[7:51 pm]

demon rainbow: they said yes
demon rainbow: do you want to go get some ice cream and then just have a walk
demon rainbow: or do you have anything you want to do

rainbow demon: no that sounds perfect

demon rainbow: okay
demon rainbow: go to sleep now, alright?

rainbow demon: alright
rainbow demon: i love you, goodnight, go to sleep too

demon rainbow: i will
demon rainbow: sleep well baby i love you too

 

[group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[8:00 pm]

demon rainbow: i talked to hyuck and we're gonna go out tomorrow
demon rainbow: i think he's feeling better

actual angel: he seems to be
actual angel: though he did seem kinda afraid to let me go even to the bathroom and asked me at least twice if i'm gonna be back

demon rainbow: he's scared of losing someone again
demon rainbow: we had a conversation like that just now as well

actual angel: 'again'?

demon rainbow: i'm pretty sure he thinks that he's lost mark for forever
demon rainbow: so yeah, again

actual angel: sigh
actual angel: i just wish they talked it out

cool dad: they will, sweetheart
cool dad: just give it time
cool dad: they're upset now, they'll talk when both of them are ready

actual angel: i know
actual angel: i just wish that time came sooner, y'know
actual angel: hurts to see them like this
actual angel: anyway how's mark doing?

cool dad: xuxi's here now
cool dad: we're all watching some kind of a drama because xuxi insisted on it and no one can say no to xuxi
cool dad: and he made mark smile

actual angel: i'm glad
actual angel: xuxi somehow always knows how to lighten up the mood

cool dad: talent

Chapter Text

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[10:58 am]

rainbow demon: rise and shine bitch
rainbow demon: when are we going out
rainbow demon: i'm Up and Energized

demon rainbow: good morning to you too
demon rainbow: i'll wake up jaemin and jeno and we can go when they're ready?

rainbow demon: hehe alright

demon rainbow: did you have breakfast yet

rainbow demon: nah
rainbow demon: but we're gonna go get ice cream anyway
rainbow demon: so i can also take something extra with that and that'll be my breakfast
rainbow demon: it's!! too!! depressing!! to!! be!! asked!! if!! i'm!! okay!! every!! five!! seconds!!
rainbow demon: i know taeyong means well and i love him, it's just that he means a bit... too well
rainbow demon: and i can't deal with that
rainbow demon: you get what i mean?

demon rainbow: yeah i know
demon rainbow: i just woke up jeno and jaemin so we can go in like half an hour or so

rainbow demon: perfect
rainbow demon: get ready to get your world rocked

demon rainbow: what do you mean
demon rainbow: marty i'm scared

rainbow demon: hehe you'll see
rainbow demon: you Know that i'm hot but you have no idea how hot your boyfriend can actually look

demon rainbow: holy heck
demon rainbow: may satan help me

rainbow demon: they won't help you

demon rainbow: they?

rainbow demon: bold of you to assume that satan is a binary figure
rainbow demon: they're definitely genderfluid and that's canon in this fanfic

demon rainbow: in this what
demon rainbow: don't break the fourth wall hyuck, what kind of a writer do you think bea is

rainbow demon: oh shit anyway satan's genderfluid and that's that
rainbow demon: you can't tell me otherwise

demon rainbow: true

rainbow demon: get ready to see ur boyfriend turn heads 'cause he definitely will uwu

demon rainbow: marty i'm so fucking scared
demon rainbow: yet so so blessed
demon rainbow: thank whoever the fuck let me date you - god or satan
demon rainbow: love you buddy

rainbow demon: thought you loved me :c

demon rainbow: more than anything
demon rainbow: so turn that frown upside down

rainbow demon: ᵕ̈

demon rainbow: that's adorable
demon rainbow: just like you

rainbow demon: ksjsjsj stop ilysm
rainbow demon: better come get this kith

demon rainbow: on my hecking way
demon rainbow: can't wait to hold ur mcfuckin hand and get a kith

rainbow demon: wow nsfw

demon rainbow: nsfw warning: i want to h*ld your mcfucking h*nd and get a k*th from you

rainbow demon: nsfw warning: i l*ve you

demon rainbow: nsfw warning: i l*ve and *ppreciate you, you're the l*ml

rainbow demon: nsfw warning: i'm fucking sob, pls get here faster so i can hug and kith you

demon rainbow: nsfw warning: omw

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D ]
[2:17 pm]

junguwu: hi

:D : hi!!
:D : how are u loml

junguwu: i'm good uwu how are u

:D : i'm great because i'm talking to you u-uwu

junguwu: i actually had a question...
junguwu: i'm suddenly overwhelmed with a surge of braveness
junguwu: so i wanted to ask if i could, perhaps, confess to doyoung

:D : YETH
:D : DO IT
:D : AND TELL ME HOW IT GOES
:D : I LOVE YOU
:D : UPDATE ME

junguwu: ksjsjd okay uwu ilysm
junguwu: i might ask doyoung's boyfriends first though
junguwu: to see if they don't mind, y'know

:D : that's great
:D : ur so considerate
:D : i love you

junguwu: ksjdk stop my heart
junguwu: i love you so much

:D : i lov you more >:(

junguwu: impossible

 

[private chat with actual angel]
[2:32 pm]

junguwu: hey yongie

actual angel: hi!!
actual angel: did you talk with xuxi?

junguwu: yeah i did
junguwu: we both like someone else as well as each other

actual angel: that's great!!
actual angel: w-wanna tell me who?

junguwu: actually that's exactly why i texted you

actual angel: to... tell me who you're crushing on?

junguwu: yeah skjdk
junguwu: 'cause my crush is on ur boyfriend

actual angel: oh
actual angel: uh which one

junguwu: doyoung

actual angel: nice
actual angel: are you gonna tell him

junguwu: i wanted to know if you and kun don't mind if i tell him

actual angel: we don't
actual angel: you should tell him
actual angel: it's always better to tell if you like someone
actual angel: best case scenario you date them, worst case scenario you stay as friends but that person has just received a compliment
actual angel: well, that's how i view it
actual angel: and, well, most of us have the same thinking
actual angel: so go for it

junguwu: okay thank you
junguwu: i love u, wish me luck

actual angel: love you too, sweetheart, good luck!!

 

[private chat with rabbit(ch)]
[2:48 pm]

junguwu: hey doyoung

rabbit(ch): hi!!

junguwu: so i had something to tell you...
junguwu: and i'm kinda,,, nervous to do so

rabbit(ch): oh worm
rabbit(ch): i'm intrigued, so do tell

junguwu: okay like ripping off a band-aid i guess
junguwu: i like you
junguwu: like as in have a crush on you

rabbit(ch): i
rabbit(ch): that's not what i expected at all
rabbit(ch): but i like you too
rabbit(ch): and have for a while now

junguwu: wait really??
junguwu: that's,, not what my expected answer was

rabbit(ch): listen
rabbit(ch): it's hard not to like you, okay
rabbit(ch): imagine not having a crush on the cutest person in the entire world
rabbit(ch): can't relate

junguwu: ksjsj stop don't say that

rabbit(ch): sorry, i have to declare the truth

junguwu: >:c

rabbit(ch): ADORABLE
rabbit(ch): a-anyway, do you want to go out with me then

junguwu: wait a second-

 

[private chat with :D]
[3:03 pm]

junguwu: HE LIKES ME BACK

:D : H*CK YEAH

junguwu: h-he asked me out too
junguwu: i told him to wait a second
junguwu: 'cause we didn't get that far in talking about it,,,,

:D : SAY YES
:D : DON'T MAKE HIM WAIT
:D : GO GO GO

junguwu: OKAY ILY UWU

:D : UWU

 

[private chat with rabbit(ch)]
[3:11 pm]

junguwu: i was having technical difficulties but i'm back now
junguwu: i'd love to go out with you uwu

rabbit(ch): technical difficulties
rabbit(ch): right
rabbit(ch): okay
rabbit(ch): where are you
rabbit(ch): i want to ask it in real life as well and hear your answer without any technical difficulties

junguwu: i'm in my room

rabbit(ch): i'll be there in a few then

 

[private chat with :D]

junguwu: he's coming over rn 'cause he wants to hear my answer irl
junguwu: my hecking heart

:D : HECK YEAH
:D : I'M HAPPY FOR U

junguwu: thank u!! ilysm!!

:D : ILYM

junguwu: impossible

Chapter Text

[private chat with actual angel]
[4:23 pm]

:D : hey did jungwoo already talk to you

actual angel: yeah, he did
actual angel: why do you ask?

:D : 'CAUSE I NEED TO SCREAM
:D : I'M SO GLAD JUNGWOO TOLD DOYOUNG
:D : I ACCIDENTALLY WALKED IN ON THEM CUDDLING AND MY HEART BURST
:D : <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 *EXPLOSION*
:D : MY BOYFRIEND AND MY BOYFRIEND'S BOYFRIEND ARE THE CUTEST

actual angel: OH WORM
actual angel: PLS TELL ME YOU TOOK PICTURES

:D : I DID
:D : [picture attached]

actual angel: SOBS
actual angel: they're so fucking cute
actual angel: finally some good fucking blackmail material

:D : I KNOW RIGHT
:D : but don't blackmail them :((

actual angel: i'd never blackmail jungwoo, he's a sweetheart and i love him
actual angel: on the other hand doyoung is a bitch and he deserves to be blackmailed
actual angel: and he hates when i show others his soft side

:D : isn't he your boyfriend

actual angel: he is
actual angel: my boyfriend who is a bitch

:D : fair enough
:D : but they're so cute i'm cry :(((

actual angel: big mood :((
actual angel: can i ask you a question, though?

:D : hm? what is it

actual angel: how are you so okay with this already

:D : what do you mean

actual angel: at first when i was dating kun and he came to me to talk about polyamory, i wasn't... happy about the idea of it
actual angel: i still agreed to it because i knew that it'd make kun happy and honestly who doesn't want kun to be happy, y'know
actual angel: but i didn't really understand how it worked at first anyway? so i was kinda jealous at taeil
actual angel: so yeah, it was rly dumb of me to not talk about it but i just wanted to see kun happy so i avoided it
actual angel: and in result i wasn't that happy at first, so i'm just surprised how you are
actual angel: 'cause i get that with time you get used to the idea and understand it better and are happy like that and maybe get another boyfriend (or in my case more than just one skjsk) of your own n stuff

:D : oh
:D : i dunno
:D : i just want jungwoo to be happy as well
:D : and i know that confessing to doyoung made him happy, so i'm happy for them
:D : and i think we just have a lot of example from you guys? 'cause you've rly shown everyone how poly relationships work and that if everyone just,,, communicates, they can be happy in whatever relationship they have, y'know
:D : so yeah, it's a mix of me wanting jungwoo to be happy and already knowing how poly relationships work because of you guys

actual angel: oh
actual angel: well
actual angel: i'm glad that we could show you an example ksjsj
actual angel: do you like someone as well?

:D : yeah, i do

actual angel: does jungwoo know?

:D : yeah we talked about it
:D : the day after jungwoo talked to you and i talked to mark
:D : i got to know he likes doyoung and i told him that i like hyuck
:D : and so we were both okay with it
:D : and it just so happened that the circumstances didn't allow me to tell hyuck y'know

actual angel: oh yeah
actual angel: that makes sense
actual angel: but once everything... clears up
actual angel: i think you'd look really good together c:

:D : uwu

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[9:44 pm]

i'm the only ten you see: i need a divorce

rainbow demon: wow me too
rainbow demon: why though

here's Johnald: I SAID I'M SORRY

demon rainbow: LEE DONGHYUCK
demon rainbow: I REFUSED ONE (1) KISS
demon rainbow: I'M NOT GONNA APOLOGIZE FOR IT

rainbow demon: sucks to be single then

demon rainbow: eXCUSE ME

i'm the only ten you see: youngho, sorry doesn't get me back my fucking shirt
i'm the only ten you see: it cost money
i'm the only ten you see: and so much time until i found it
i'm the only ten you see: and you had to ruin it with ur coffee
i'm the only ten you see: i'm with hyuck on this, we can both be single, buddy
i'm the only ten you see: well
i'm the only ten you see: as single as i can be

rainbow demon: and to think we were just dating, too
rainbow demon: sigh

i'm the only ten you see: that's how life goes, kiddo
i'm the only ten you see: you get yourself a dumbass boyfriend, devote your life to him
i'm the only ten you see: and then he does something unforgivable
i'm the only ten you see: men truly ain't shit

demon rainbow: lee donghyuck
demon rainbow: i will smother you with kisses from head to uhh head

rainbow demon: see, that's what you're saying
rainbow demon: but how can i believe you when you haven't done anything for me to believe that's going to come true

i'm the only ten you see: that's right hyuck, don't give up that easily

demon rainbow: WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU TEN

here's Johnald: renjun, ur making a grave mistake questioning them
here's Johnald: Never Ever question ten

demon rainbow: i
demon rainbow: alright
demon rainbow: now i'm scared and sorry

rainbow demon: and i still haven't been smothered with kisses
rainbow demon: life truly is unfair being single huh

i'm the only ten you see: i'd say i relate but i'm not single bc i've got other boyfriends as well hehe

rainbow demon: what's a herd of boyfriends called
rainbow demon: there should be a word for it
rainbow demon: there's a word for a herd of unicorns, there has to be a word for a boyfriend herd

demon rainbow: sigh
demon rainbow: i'm coming over, do you want me to take anything
demon rainbow: snacks, drinks, jeno, jaemin, my computer

i'm the only ten you see: you better use this opportunity to ask for everything hyuck
i'm the only ten you see: get him to appreciate you

rainbow demon: i don't think that's how i'm gonna get him to appreciate me but yeah, take all of those with you
rainbow demon: we can continue our day with some shitty dramas

demon rainbow: we'll be right there then

i'm the only ten you see: ugh if only youngho had been like renjun we would've still been dating now
i'm the only ten you see: sucks to be dating one less person but ig that's how life is

here's Johnald: sigh
here's Johnald: you see hyuck, even though ten is acting like this, i love them with my entire heart
here's Johnald: and there's no better datemate i could ask for

i'm the only ten you see: you won't get anywhere with compliments, you bitch

here's Johnald: they're perfect in so many ways
here's Johnald: like, firstly just look at them. w o n d e r f u l
here's Johnald: and the personality's amazing too

i'm the only ten you see: stop that

here's Johnald: and they have the cutest fucking nose, i just want to boop it and kiss it so much

rainbow demon: that's disgusting
rainbow demon: get ur boyfriend ten
rainbow demon: he deserves ur forgiveness by now, don't make us all suffer through him complimenting you even more

i'm the only ten you see: sigh
i'm the only ten you see: it's alright ig
i'm the only ten you see: come get this kith or whatever

here's Johnald: and this, kids, is how to get along with your datemate 101

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[2:47 am]

demon rainbow: hey, you said to text you once we get back
demon rainbow: i'm back in my room now

rainbow demon: i thought you three were gonna stay together in jaemin's room?

demon rainbow: yeah that's what i thought but i changed my mind
demon rainbow: my own bed n stuff, y'know

rainbow demon: who are you and what have you done to my boyfriend who is definitely in love with jeno and jaemin and wouldn't pass on such an opportunity

demon rainbow: sksksk i just wanted to be in my room, that's not strange

rainbow demon: yeah nah mate
rainbow demon: you never pass up a chance to spend time with jeno and jaemin, junnie
rainbow demon: i know you
rainbow demon: i'm your Boyfriend

demon rainbow: sigh
demon rainbow: ig it's kinda hard for me hang around them that much, especially like cuddling w/ them bc my heart???? GONE
demon rainbow: and it's kinda hhhhhhh bc they're completely happy with each other and aren't interested in me, y'know

rainbow demon: okay so i'm sorry for what i'm about to say but
rainbow demon: bro

demon rainbow: never call me that again
demon rainbow: i'm going to get a divorce

rainbow demon: listen, it seemed very wrong for me too, okay
rainbow demon: but it had to be done
rainbow demon: anyway
rainbow demon: you're so dumb if you don't know that you have those two wrapped around your finger
rainbow demon: i saw how they were looking at you
rainbow demon: i'm p sure the only thing keeping them back from confessing to u now is dating me so,,, uhh sorry ur stuck with me pal
rainbow demon: so yeah, you should tell them u like them instead

demon rainbow: what if they don't like me and i end up looking like boo boo the fool

rainbow demon: renjun,,,,
rainbow demon: your brain cells
rainbow demon: how long is the vacation they're taking

demon rainbow: JKDKSDJ
demon rainbow: stop i'm being serious kjsjsj

rainbow demon: me too bitch
rainbow demon: listen, you can't ever know if you don't ask, okay

demon rainbow: yeah but :(((

rainbow demon: but you should tell them
rainbow demon: look at it from the bright side
rainbow demon: you'll never lose me uwu

demon rainbow: unfortunately

rainbow demon: BITCH

demon rainbow: i'm joking, ily uwu

rainbow demon: you better
rainbow demon: n e way, i'm p tired, long day
rainbow demon: so i'm gonna sleep, you should too uwu

demon rainbow: i'm gonna, yeah
demon rainbow: i love you so much

rainbow demon: i love you too, sleep well

 

[private chat with sk8r boi]

dancy pants: renjun :((( is :((( so :((( pretty :(((

sk8r boi: whipped
sk8r boi: but so fucking true
sk8r boi: perhapth i l*ve him

dancy pants: me too :((
dancy pants: we gotta tell him tho

sk8r boi: ...
sk8r boi: too unrealistic, try again
sk8r boi: plus he just got together with hyuck, so

dancy pants: but i just want to kith him
dancy pants: and cuddle him
dancy pants: and tell him that i lov him
dancy pants: and ruffle his hair
dancy pants: and pinch his cheeks

sk8r boi: valid
sk8r boi: me too
sk8r boi: we can think about it tomorrow baby
sk8r boi: it's late now
sk8r boi: let's go to bed?

dancy pants: yeah
dancy pants: probably should
dancy pants: i'll be out of the bathroom soon uwu wait for me

sk8r boi: i'm gonna be the little spoon today

dancy pants: wouldn't take it any other way

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[11:34 am]

demon rainbow: hey wanna come get breakfast with me
demon rainbow: or have you already eaten

rainbow demon: i haven't yet
rainbow demon: but i don't wanna go,,,
rainbow demon: mark could be there,,, and i'm really not ready to see him, y'know

demon rainbow: yeah i get it don't worry
demon rainbow: if mark's not there, will you come

rainbow demon: yeah, i'm kinda hungry

demon rainbow: i'll ask someone if he's there then

rainbow demon: alright

 

[group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[11:40 am]

demon rainbow: hey guys
demon rainbow: is mark at breakfast now
demon rainbow: hyuck said that he wanted to eat but he doesn't want to meet mark

cool dad: mark ate at around 6 already 'cause he woke up when i got out of bed and insisted he'd help me make it
cool dad: so now him and xuxi are either in the gym or watching shitty dramas

demon rainbow: ah alright got it
demon rainbow: thank u

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[11:44 am]

demon rainbow: mark ate at 6 already
demon rainbow: so we can go if you wanna

rainbow demon: okay
rainbow demon: we can meet there?

demon rainbow: yeah alright
demon rainbow: can't wait to see u hehe
demon rainbow: you might catch a fat kith, who knows

rainbow demon: wow, you won't let me keep my uwus to myself at all huh
rainbow demon: not even complaining, i lov you, you deserve all my uwus

demon rainbow: i'm not worthy of them
demon rainbow: but i'll accept u-uwu

rainbow demon: you better
rainbow demon: otherwise i'm gonna have to forcefully give them to you and that's not nice for anyone involved

demon rainbow: is that a threat

rainbow demon: perhapth

demon rainbow: i'm a bad bitch, i'm not scared of anything

rainbow demon: i beg to differ
rainbow demon: i could name at least seven things and then show you four more

demon rainbow: ...fair enough
demon rainbow: but i'm still a bad bitch, aren't i

rainbow demon: whatever you say love whatever you say

demon rainbow: hehe c:

rainbow demon: ur an adorable bad bitch
rainbow demon: i lov you

demon rainbow: i lov you more

[12:12 pm]

demon rainbow: is it okay if jaemin and jeno come? they just texted me

rainbow demon: yeah
rainbow demon: the more the merrier

demon rainbow: alright uwu
demon rainbow: see you in a few then

rainbow demon: alrighty uwu

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[3:33 pm]

junguwu: hey guys

cool dad: our days have been blessed
cool dad: henlo angel

junguwu: (*^^*)
junguwu: i actually came here to announce something...
junguwu: doyoungie and i are dating now uwu

cool dad: i knew about it before but i'm so happy for you guys!!
cool dad: i love seeing new couples

junguwu: \(^o^)/

demon rainbow: owo what about xuxi?

junguwu: we're still dating too!!
junguwu: i have two boyfies now uwu

demon rainbow: it's what you deserve
demon rainbow: you need more
demon rainbow: there can never be too much love given to you uwu

junguwu: u-uwu thank u ily

rabbit(ch): that's right bitches i'm dating this absolute angelic being
rabbit(ch): i'm the lucky one hehe
rabbit(ch): me and xuxi, i mean
rabbit(ch): we're the luckiest people to live on this entire planet because we've been blessed with the opportunity to date you uwu

junguwu: aaaaa stop that :(( ily
junguwu: i'm gonna blush and then i'll sue you :((

rabbit(ch): making you blush is my greatest achievement in life

junguwu: (⋋_⋌)

rabbit(ch): cute :c

:D : i lov my boyfriend and my boyfriend's boyfriend hehe

sk8r boi: jeno and i are happy for u guys!! y'all look cute together
sk8r boi: not cuter than me and jeno
sk8r boi: but sufficient

i'm the only ten you see: do all tall people kinda just magnetize around each other
i'm the only ten you see: i'm glad y'all are together or whatever but like,,, no stop tall people together are unacceptable
i'm the only ten you see: it's enough that youngho's dating jaehyun already,,,

rabbit(ch): ten
rabbit(ch): if you want to, i can make you taller :)
rabbit(ch): it might hurt a bit though :) but it seems like u rly want it so you won't have any problem sacrificing yourself a bit, right?

i'm the only ten you see: YOUNGHO PLS SAVE ME, KEEP THAT MONSTER AWAY FROM ME

junguwu: hey, doyoungie's not a monster :((

i'm the only ten you see: you're right, completely right, always and forever
i'm the only ten you see: doyoung's uhhh great ig
i'm the only ten you see: anything you believe in, i believe too uwu

rabbit(ch): ugh your power, jungwoo
rabbit(ch): that's my boyfriend hehe
rabbit(ch): i love finally saying that

junguwu: (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵) ily

rabbit(ch): ilym uwu

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[4:09 pm]

demon rainbow: hey bub wanna go out somewhere?

rainbow demon: today?

demon rainbow: yeah

rainbow demon: i'm kinda tired still :((
rainbow demon: some other day?

demon rainbow: yeah of course
demon rainbow: rest bby ilysm

rainbow demon: ilysmm

Chapter Text

[rabbit(ch) has created a group chat 'jungwoo's boyfies']
[rabbit(ch) added junguwu and :D]

junguwu: what's this

rabbit(ch): everyone has these chats, it's easier to talk that way
rabbit(ch): plan stuff out n all uwu
rabbit(ch): i'm gonna add you to mine too uwu
rabbit(ch): lowkey forgot mine existed bc we all talk mostly in 'kun's boyfies' oops
rabbit(ch): all the chats are matching too hehe

junguwu: that's cute
junguwu: so if i wanted to schedule a cuddling session with both of my boyfriends, i'd ask here?

rabbit(ch): yes, exactly

junguwu: hmm
junguwu: then hypothetically... when would both of you be free

:D : anytime for you!!

rabbit(ch): hypothetically now and forever

junguwu: hypothetically, could i get both of my boyfriends to cuddle me in about five minutes then?

rabbit(ch): hypothetically i'm on my way

:D : do you want any snacks??

junguwu: i mean, you're already bringing yourself anyway
junguwu: hypothetically

:D : JUNGWOO
:D : I'M GONNA BE THERE AND UNHYPOTHETICALLY KITH YOU

junguwu: hehe, good
junguwu: doyoungie, do you want anything?

rabbit(ch): uhh
rabbit(ch): if it's not too much trouble, i could use something to drink?

:D : i'll take something uwu

rabbit(ch): thank

:D : welc uwu

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[5:43 pm]

dancy pants: hey jun
dancy pants: do you and hyuck wanna hang out tonight?
dancy pants: i know we did like two days ago but nana really wants to try this one place he found recently
dancy pants: and we thought it could be like a double date if you two came

demon rainbow: oh that sounds fun!!
demon rainbow: i'll ask hyuckie
demon rainbow: what is That One Place?

dancy pants: uh i don't know ksjdjs some cafe
dancy pants: he always finds the strangest places, you know that
dancy pants: so i suggest eating a bit before we go
dancy pants: if we go, that is

demon rainbow: intriguing
demon rainbow: i'll ask hyuck

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[5:57 pm]

demon rainbow: hi loml
demon rainbow: do you wanna go on a double date with jeno and jaemin
demon rainbow: jeno texted me saying that nana found a cafe that he wanted to try out

rainbow demon: hi!! uwu ilysm
rainbow demon: i'm really tired today :((
rainbow demon: i was at my vocal lessons and then practiced the dances a bit
rainbow demon: i think i'm gonna go to sleep soon actually
rainbow demon: i'm gonna have to decline this time, i'm sorry :(( but go with them on an uhhhh 1.5 date

demon rainbow: do you want me to come over?
demon rainbow: i could tuck you in blankets and we could cuddle until you fall asleep

rainbow demon: that sounds like heaven
rainbow demon: but i think you should go with jeno and jaemin
rainbow demon: it'll be fun, love

demon rainbow: you sure?

rainbow demon: yeah, more than sure uwu

demon rainbow: alright
demon rainbow: i love you

rainbow demon: i love you more

 

[private chat with dancy pants]
[6:19 pm]

demon rainbow: hyuck said that he's too tired to go anywhere

dancy pants: oh that sucks
dancy pants: are you still gonna come with us
dancy pants: or are you gonna stay in with hyuck?

demon rainbow: i'd love to go with you guys uwu

dancy pants: heck yeck
dancy pants: can we go in like an hour?

demon rainbow: yeah any time
demon rainbow: i only have to get changed anyway so i'm ready whenever

dancy pants: alrighty
dancy pants: see you in an hour then hehe mwah

Chapter Text

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[9:32 am]

rainbow demon: hey junnie
rainbow demon: did u have fun yesterday uwu

demon rainbow: hi bby
demon rainbow: yeah, we did!!

rainbow demon: what did you do

demon rainbow: we went to that cafe, which was surprisingly good
demon rainbow: we should go there someday
demon rainbow: then jaemin and jeno fought as always bc jeno was surprised that the food there was alright
demon rainbow: so to "get back at him" jaemin came to sit at my side of the table and later i had to sit in his lap because he was hiding from jeno

rainbow demon: SKSJKS
rainbow demon: that must've felt like heaven for u ksksk

demon rainbow: it did :((
demon rainbow: i'm l*v

rainbow demon: valid
rainbow demon: who wouldn't be, it's jaemin and jeno

demon rainbow: o-owo do you want to tell me something with that

rainbow demon: ,,,
rainbow demon: ,,,,

demon rainbow: WHICH ONE OF THEM
demon rainbow: BOTH, NEITHER, ONE OF THEM

rainbow demon: p-perhapth i have a tiny cruthh on ******

demon rainbow: relatable
demon rainbow: i think i started liking jeno at first though
demon rainbow: but my heart's now divided in three equal pieces for u, jeno and jaemin

rainbow demon: ****** has crusty lips though
rainbow demon: he's a really good kisser but his lips are fucking crusty smh

demon rainbow: and all this time i thought that the talks about y'all kissing were just jokes

rainbow demon: oh yeah nah i think we're all p free about that
rainbow demon: we've made out n stuff

demon rainbow: wow, i can only wish for such luck

rainbow demon: ur the best kisser though

demon rainbow: that's an honour owo

rainbow demon: sksksk jaemin's lips are crusty but he's a good kisser, jeno has nice lips but he's not THAT good at kissing (still good though), but ur the best
rainbow demon: only after me though hehe

demon rainbow: you don't know that, you haven't kissed urself >:(

rainbow demon: trust me, i just know

demon rainbow: that's not fair

rainbow demon: then go kiss jeno/jaemin and make them say which one of us is better hehe

demon rainbow: i can'T JUST DO THAT

rainbow demon: you can and you will

demon rainbow: i CAN'T

 

[private chat with sk8r boi]
[9:41 am]

rainbow demon: hey nana
rainbow demon: renjun and i are having a discussion about which one of us is a better kisser
rainbow demon: can he come over and kiss you so you can judge accordingly

sk8r boi: yeah sure
sk8r boi: sounds fun
sk8r boi: should jeno also come to be like a 2nd judge

rainbow demon: yeah, would be good
rainbow demon: thank u uwu

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[9:46 am]

rainbow demon: [screenshot attached]
rainbow demon: now you HAVE TO

demon rainbow: "can he come over and kiss you"
demon rainbow: is that REALLY how you thought was the best way to ask

rainbow demon: well it's not the worst
rainbow demon: and it's true, so...

demon rainbow: STILL
demon rainbow: i can't believe my own boyfriend is making me go kiss two different guys

rainbow demon: you're welcome, bitch

demon rainbow: t-thank you

rainbow demon: tell me how it goes

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[11:29 am]

sk8r boi: we're stealing ur boyfriend
sk8r boi: need to do some more judging, y'know

rainbow demon: alright
rainbow demon: make sure he doesn't die though
rainbow demon: he can get really flustered
rainbow demon: i mean really really flustered
rainbow demon: :)

sk8r boi: i'll make sure to note that hehe

rainbow demon: you better uwu

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[2:39 pm]

demon rainbow: donghyuck hELP
demon rainbow: i'm locked in the bathroom
demon rainbow: jaemin and jeno are CRAZY
demon rainbow: i had to RUN AWAY
demon rainbow: save me please

rainbow demon: owo suffer

demon rainbow: donghyuck PLEASE
demon rainbow: jaemin keeps kissing me and basically uses me as a guinea pig for his new "kissing techniques"
demon rainbow: which is,,, amazing but
demon rainbow: wait i think they went away

rainbow demon: sounds fun

demon rainbow: hey hyuck jaemin here, we're still keeping your boyfriend for a while pal
demon rainbow: not hurting him
demon rainbow: just all the kisses and love uwu

rainbow demon: you do that hehe

demon rainbow: he blushes so cutely :(((( i might keep him forever
demon rainbow: if he doesn't choke us both ig

rainbow demon: hey i'm gonna need him back :(((
rainbow demon: who else am i gonna match screen names with

demon rainbow: that's fair, i'll think about letting him go

rainbow demon: thank u
rainbow demon: now go shower my boyfriend with kisses

demon rainbow: alright hehe
demon rainbow: see you later uwu

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[6:38 pm]

dancy pants: hey hyuck
dancy pants: come over
dancy pants: we have understood a fatal flaw here in our system
dancy pants: three people can't kiss all at the same time
dancy pants: we need a fourth one
dancy pants: so come here u-uwu

rainbow demon: i don't feel like it today, i'm sorry :((

dancy pants: oh
dancy pants: alright
dancy pants: another day?

rainbow demon: yeah, sounds great uwu

dancy pants: alright uwu

 

[private chat with actual angel]
[7:08 pm]

rainbow demon: hey

actual angel: my favourite son, henlo
actual angel: how can ii help you uwu

rainbow demon: i actually wanted to ask if mark's already eaten dinner
rainbow demon: i don't want to run into him, y'know...

actual angel: he just left for dinner with youngho, ten, and kun so he won't be here
actual angel: so come

rainbow demon: ah okay thank u

actual angel: no problem uwu

Chapter Text

[group chat 'kun's boyfies']
[10:34 pm]

cool dad: hey guys
cool dad: i don't think i'll be able to make breakfast tomorrow morning
cool dad: i'm rly tired and i'm pretty sure that also a bit sick :(((

actual angel: oh no, what's wrong
actual angel: does anything hurt
actual angel: temperature?

i'm the only ten you see: ^???

cool dad: no, my throat's hurting a bit and i've got a runny nose, it's alright
cool dad: nothing to worry about
cool dad: just making me a bit tired
cool dad: so i was thinking about sleeping in tomorrow
cool dad: if you guys don't mind

actual angel: no i'll make breakfast tomorrow don't worry about it
actual angel: sleep as long you want baby uwu
actual angel: i'm coming over and taking care of you

cool dad: ah no you don't have to i'm fine, really

actual angel: no you're not
actual angel: i'm coming over with tea and cookies
actual angel: and tucking you into bed
actual angel: and then cuddling you

i'm the only ten you see: i'm coming too
i'm the only ten you see: cuddling all illnesses away since 1996

here's Johnald: 1) i'm coming too
here's Johnald: 2) ten you were just born in 1996
here's Johnald: how could you cuddle anything away
here's Johnald: you were even tinier than you are now

i'm the only ten you see: are you calling me tiny now

here's Johnald: yes

i'm the only ten you see: bitch

Milky Boy: i'm coming over too

cool dad: are we gonna have enough place for everyone

Milky Boy: we're gonna make enough place
Milky Boy: i have to save youngho
Milky Boy: or help ten
Milky Boy: i haven't decided yet

rabbit(ch): if jungwoo can come to, we're coming

cool dad: if you can find space for everyone
cool dad: then sure
cool dad: but you might have to sleep either on top of someone or on the ground

rabbit(ch): that's fine with us
rabbit(ch): we want to join the cuddle pile

cool dad: alright
cool dad: @actual angel if you can, bring some more of those cookies because it seems like we're gonna have a lot of people over

actual angel: alrighty
actual angel: but if anyone wants anything else, get it for yourselves
actual angel: i'm taking care only of kun

i'm the only ten you see: so are we
i'm the only ten you see: fighting youngho is just a secondary objective

cool dad: no fighting

i'm the only ten you see: alright :((

cool dad: c:!!

i'm the only ten you see: c:

actual angel: and now over here you can see that these specimens have developed a new language using no letters but expressing emotion perfectly
actual angel: @country boy are you coming too, baby

country boy: if there's enough space for me, then i'd love to

cool dad: there's always space for you, sweetheart

country boy: c:

i'm the only ten you see: this is favouritism
i'm the only ten you see: just because mark's the youngest
i'm the only ten you see: mark ur getting ur ass kicked so you better come

actual angel: i'm not letting you kick mark's ass, ten

i'm the only ten you see: i don't care what you're letting me do, bitch

cool dad: ten don't kick mark's ass :((

i'm the only ten you see: hh alright :((

actual angel: THAT'S favouritism
actual angel: but fair
actual angel: kun's amazing
actual angel: it's what he deserves

moonmoon: the three of us are coming too, i don't care if there's no more space left

cool dad: alright

Chapter Text

[group chat 'kun's boyfies']
[7:32 am]

cool dad: hey @actual angel do you need any help in the kitchen love
cool dad: i'm feeling better today

actual angel: no you stay sleeping
actual angel: i'm bringing breakfast to you
actual angel: no's not an appropriate answer

cool dad: but i can come to the kitchen
cool dad: you don't have to do that for me

actual angel: i don't have to but i will
actual angel: you better stay in bed

cool dad: did you actually just call ten so they could keep me in bed
cool dad: of course you did
cool dad: well, i'm not complaining because they're cuddling me and i'm uwu

i'm the only ten you see: i was woken up for a good reason but i'm going back to sleep on top of kun bc there is no space left in the bed

actual angel: but i was sleeping there
actual angel: and no one else was in bed except for kun and mark and that bed can easily fit three people
actual angel: plus ur like tiny

i'm the only ten you see: I'M NOT TINY SHUT THE FUCK UP
i'm the only ten you see: that and youngho got in bed when you left
i'm the only ten you see: so there is No Space except on top of people
i'm the only ten you see: try not to spill coffee on anyone when you come

actual angel: i won't
actual angel: i asked hyuck to help me bring everything here 'cause he came to breakfast early
actual angel: so it's alright
actual angel: i'll bring the breakfast, then take the coffee from hyuck and bring that in
actual angel: i plan Everything

i'm the only ten you see: hm sure you do
i'm the only ten you see: ur the most chaotic pan i've ever seen
i'm the only ten you see: so don't even try
i'm the only ten you see: bitch

actual angel: ...
actual angel: valid
actual angel: go back to sleep
actual angel: but don't suffocate kun, we love kun

i'm the only ten you see: i'd never
i'm the only ten you see: but n knee way
i'm the only ten you see: going back to sleep, goodnight
i'm the only ten you see: or good morning rather, i guess

here's Johnald: ten stepped on me to get to kun
here's Johnald: petition to make kun's room bigger

cool dad: it's already big
cool dad: it's just that no normal bedroom is big enough for ten people at the same time

here'e Johnald: Petitoon To Make Kun's Room Bigger

actual angel: signed
actual angel: we should just have a room that's only bed, just,,, all bed
actual angel: for days like these when we All want to cuddle kun

cool dad: that sounds comfy until when you have to get out of the room and have to walk over soft mattresses
cool dad: you'd trip on someone and fall

here's Johnald: we do that anyway

cool dad: you've got a point

here's Johnald: i always do

i'm the only ten you see: i smelt bullshit and woke up
i'm the only ten you see: you Never have a point, thot

here's Johnald: excuse me
here's Johnald: i do

i'm the only ten you see: no you don't you overgrown giant dick

here's Johnald: are you calling my dick giant

i'm the only ten you see: NO
i'm the only ten you see: once we get out of here, i'm going to choke you

here's Johnald: ah, role reversal
here's Johnald: fun

i'm the only ten you see: MMMMM
i'm the only ten you see: SHUT UP

actual angel: i
actual angel: didn't know that
actual angel: thank you youngho
actual angel: a-anyway i'm coming with kun's breakfast

Chapter Text

[group chat 'kun's boyfies']
[2:04 pm]

i'm the only ten you see: guys
i'm the only ten you see: what if we all had a big orgy
i'm the only ten you see: like
i'm the only ten you see: twelve of us
i'm the only ten you see: bc doyoung's dating jungwoo now and jungwoo's dating xuxi

here's Johnald: ten, i'm so tired
here's Johnald: it's 2 pm
here's Johnald: why are you talking about orgies in the middle of the day

cool dad: ten why does your mind always come to this

i’m the only ten you see: i’m only asking the questions you’re too afraid to ask

here’s Johnald: literally none of us were wondering that
here’s Johnald: i hope

i’m the only ten you see: i’m only looking for ways how to improve our relationship, you should be thankful
i’m the only ten you see: but you’re shunning me instead
i’m the only ten you see: for example, i’m wondering if any of you have had threesomes
i’m the only ten you see: just so we’re all honest and know more about each other

actual angel: yeah
actual angel: technically it was a foursome though

here’s Johnald: taeyong not you too
here’s Johnald: do we want to hear about that

actual angel: johnny
actual angel: you literally took a part in it
actual angel: you already know everything anyway

i’m the only ten you see: WHAT
i’m the only ten you see: I WANT TO HEAR EVERYTHING

actual angel: i mean
actual angel: what do you want to know,,,,
actual angel: it’s just like a foursome would go only a bit messier y’know

i’m the only ten you see: well, first of all, with WHOM

actual angel: uhh, people
actual angel: idk if they wanna be revealed
actual angel: so yeah uhhh
actual angel: that

Milky Boy: i was in it too hehe

i’m the only ten you see: so, i know three of you, which one of you was the fourth, fuckers

cool dad: it was actually me

i’m the only ten you see: *sweethearts
i’m the only ten you see: haha autocorrect
i’m the only ten you see: i want to know more though??????
i’m the only ten you see: how did it go
i’m the only ten you see: when did you do it
i’m the only ten you see: how did you come to that idea
i’m the only ten you see: when are you doing it again and when can i join

here’s Johnald: once upon a time, about two years ago when we weren’t dating yet

actual angel: how do you expect a foursome to go
actual angel: it was,,, a foursome, involved sex, surprising, i know
actual angel: it was fun

cool dad: who even had the idea

actual angel: i think i wanted to try something else and jaehyun suggested a threesome but it turned into a foursome
actual angel: and it took a surprising amount of planning actually
actual angel: scheduling alone was a pain in the ass skjsk
actual angel: and it was a bit awkward but fun afterwards

i’m the only ten you see: heck
i’m the only ten you see: i want that too ):<

actual angel: oh boy

here’s Johnald: hmm

actual angel: are you rly considering it

here’s Johnald: Hmm

actual angel: fair enough
actual angel: hmm

i’m the only ten you see: o-owo

actual angel: it would be fun i guess

i’m the only ten you see: O-OwO

cool dad: i’m not scheduling it, so you decide

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[6:09 pm]

actual angel: hey sweetheart

cool dad: hi, angel

actual angel: have you seen mark after he left your room?
actual angel: i don't want to bother him by texting and seeming overprotective n all

cool dad: mm yeah
cool dad: he came in and we cuddled, kissed a bit and then he left to his room

actual angel: ah alright thank u
actual angel: if you see him coming to dinner, ask him to wait a bit
actual angel: hyuck's here and they've been trying to avoid each other and i think it'd be better for them to stay away from each other
actual angel: and then we can do something to make them talk to each other when they're calmer

cool dad: alright angel
cool dad: love you

actual angel: love you more sweetheart

cool dad: oh, by the way
cool dad: i wanted to ask

actual angel: what is it, sweetheart

cool dad: have you already planned who you're going to sleep with tonight
cool dad: or just your room
cool dad: or...?

actual angel: i haven't yet, no
actual angel: i usually just go with the flow with these things, you know that

cool dad: do you want to sleep with me?
cool dad: just the two of us
cool dad: can't remember the last time we cuddled alone

actual angel: i'd love that more than anything

cool dad: i'm glad
cool dad: okay mark just came in again
cool dad: text me when we can come to dinner, angel?

actual angel: of course, sweetheart

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[6:36 pm]

:D : hey hyuckie

rainbow demon: hi xuxi!!

:D : how are u
:D : how have you been

rainbow demon: i'm alright uwu what about you <3

:D : i'm good!! what are you doing tonight? i wanna take you out

rainbow demon: aaaaa xuxi i love you so much
rainbow demon: but not tonight, i'm sorry :(( i'm really really tired and you'll end up having to carry me back to the dorms
rainbow demon: and i know you could easily do it
rainbow demon: but i'd prefer falling asleep in my own bed

:D : ah that's alright, bub
:D : tell me when you're freer, okay?
:D : you deserve to be taken out >:(

rainbow demon: especially by a rifle

:D : NO!!!
:D : u deserve to be taken out on dates and meals and getting taken home smiling and happy bc u are u and u deserve so much happiness that the world can't even comprehend it

rainbow demon: xuxi i could KITH you
rainbow demon: you're the cutest person to ever exist
rainbow demon: thank you :(( <3

:D : lov u!!

rainbow demon: love u more!!!

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[6:42 pm]

actual angel: you two can come eat
actual angel: hyuckie just left so you won't run into him

cool dad: ah okay
cool dad: thank you, angel
cool dad: love you

actual angel: love you too, sweetheart

Chapter Text

[private chat with country boy]
[10:11 am]

here's Johnald: good morning sunshine
here's Johnald: ten and i were thinking if you wanted to go out with us today
here's Johnald: go to a cafe or just the shopping district or something like that

country boy: o, that sounds great, i'd love to come

here's Johnald: do you want to go to that cafe we found the other day that you liked?

country boy: didn't ten hate it there

here's Johnald: they can suck it up
here's Johnald: let them suffer

country boy: no i'm scared of them
country boy: they'll snap my neck

here's Johnald: i won't let them uwu

country boy: bold of you to assume you have Any power over ten
country boy: it's,,, ten, they're tiny but i'm terrified of them

here's Johnald: that's fair
here's Johnald: i'll tell kun to tell ten to not attack you uwu
here's Johnald: they always listen to kun

country boy: everyone always listens to kun

here's Johnald: true
here's Johnald: it's what he deserves

country boy: agreed, kun is godsent and the only person who can Ever control ten

here's Johnald: yes
here's Johnald: also, when do you want to go, sunshine

country boy: uh, i think i'll get some breakfast first
country boy: and after that we can go?
country boy: though if donghyuck is there, we can go now and pick something up on our way
country boy: don't want to uhhh run into him,,,

here's Johnald: he already ate when i was there, don't worry
here's Johnald: you can go and get some food now, bub

country boy: ah, alright
country boy: then i'll come to your room after i eat and we can go?

here's Johnald: alright
here's Johnald: though we're gonna have to wait for ten because they can't choose what to wear
here's Johnald: and knowing them,,,, it's gonna take time until they decide to wear the same thing as yesterday

country boy: how have you not yeeted them across the room yet

here's Johnald: how have i not what yet

country boy: d-do you not know what 'to yeet' means

here's Johnald: should i???

country boy: yes
country boy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Bjy5YQ5xPc

here's Johnald: ...
here's Johnald: i'm going to yeet ten across the room

country boy: WAIT DON'T DO IT YET I NEED TO SEE IT
country boy: a-and tell kun to not let ten attack me before as well
country boy: because they will try to do it

here's Johnald: okay
here's Johnald: now go eat breakfast and come over

Chapter Text

[group chat 'kun's boyfies']
[10:56 am]

moonmoon: so does anyone know why ten is screaming at the bathroom door

actual angel: they're what
actual angel: are they just screaming or, like, yelling with words

moonmoon: i'm pretty sure they're yelling in thai
moonmoon: which is amusing but also fairly concerning,,,,

here's Johnald: that may or may not be my fault

actual angel: oh no what did you do
actual angel: do you need any rescuing

here's Johnald: uhh not me
here's Johnald: mark could use some though

actual angel: what did mark ever do to them
actual angel: get them away from mark >:(
actual angel: our poor boyfriend's gonna get scared

here's Johnald: i can't, i'm hiding in another bathroom

country boy: i taught johnny what yeet meant
country boy: so he yeeted ten across the room

loselose: i believe the past tense is yote

country boy: valid
country boy: so he yote ten across the room

actual angel: YOUNGHO DID YOU ACTUALLY THROW TEN
actual angel: DID YOUR LAST BRAIN CELLS LEAVE YOU
actual angel: @i'm the only ten you see are you okay???

i'm the only ten you see: i will be once i beat up mark and youngho

actual angel: that's fair
actual angel: go easy on mark though

i'm the only ten you see: no

actual angel: ...can't say he doesn't deserve it this time

country boy: HEY
country boy: I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING
country boy: I ONLY SAID WHAT YEET MEANS

actual angel: but you knew that youngho would do that
actual angel: why did you promote such activity

country boy: fair enough

i'm the only ten you see: open up so i can dropkick you
i'm the only ten you see: i'll consider not doing more if you help me get johnny

here's Johnald: HEY DON'T GANG UP ON ME

country boy: it's only fair...

here's Johnald: NO IT'S NOT

actual angel: please don't actually fight anyone, ten
actual angel: @cool dad help me out here

cool dad: oh god i leave for a few hours and this is what happens
cool dad: y'know what, ten
cool dad: do as you like, i believe in you

actual angel: kun no
actual angel: pls imagine the aftermath

i'm the only ten you see: thanks babe love you

actual angel: love you too

here's Johnald: that's fair

i'm the only ten you see: come out and face the consequences

here's Johnald: i'm gay
here's Johnald: does that count as the coming out

i'm the only ten you see: no, you're not even gay
i'm the only ten you see: @country boy come out you little bitch

country boy: i'm bi

i'm the only ten you see: DON'T REPEAT JOKES AND EXIT THE FUCKING BATHROOM, YOU DUMBASS BITCH

country boy: pls help i'm scared

i'm the only ten you see: as you fucking should be

country boy: wish me luck guys
country boy: tell my boyfriends i loved them

here's Johnald: good luck mark, you're braver than any of us
here's Johnald: braver and... dumber than any of us
here's Johnald: oh no i'm next
here's Johnald: will i be missed

actual angel: barely
actual angel: you just got mark killed
actual angel: i have no mercy left for you

here's Johnald: I'M NOT THE ONE KILLING HIM STOP
here's Johnald: BLAME TEN, IT'S THEM ACTUALLY DOING IT

actual angel: you provocated them
actual angel: therefore it's your fault
actual angel: go out and face the consequences ten has prepared for you, you deserve them

here's Johnald: wow if that's what you think then i might as well
here's Johnald: if you don't want me around anymore...

actual angel: stop being dramatic and GO
actual angel: save mark

here's Johnald: that's favouritism

actual angel: that's because i am, in fact, dating mark
actual angel: but i am not, in fact, dating you

here's Johnald: not yet ;)

actual angel: MMMM WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN
actual angel: GO AWAY
actual angel: DIE AT THE HANDS OF TEN

Milky Boy: you really can't hide your panic, taeyong, you really can't

actual angel: SHUT UP

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[3:46 pm]

:D : :(

junguwu: oh no
junguwu: who do i have to hurt

:D : :c

junguwu: >:( what's wrong

:D : i haven't seen donghyuck in days :( and i miss him :(( and i'm sad that mark's sad :((( and just :(((( they don't deserve to be sad :(((((
:D : and i want to be there for both of them :(((((( but i can't :((((((( because hyuck doesn't want to see me now :((((((((

junguwu: oh baby :(
junguwu: give it time, love
junguwu: they'll be okay
junguwu: i'm sure that donghyuck's not avoiding just you, he adores you
junguwu: he just needs some time without people

:D : but he's still sad :(( i don't mind not hanging out with him if that's what he wants but i don't want him to be sad
:D : and same with mark :(( at least he lets me hang out with him and i can try to make him feel better
:D : but i can't do anything with hyuck

junguwu: they'll talk soon enough, love
junguwu: it's mark and donghyuck, they can't live without each other
junguwu: they just need some time to calm down

:D : :((

junguwu: i'm coming to cuddle and hug and smooch you
junguwu: so don't be :((

:D : :D!!

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[5:07 pm]

demon rainbow: babe

rainbow demon: yeth

demon rainbow: do you want to hang out with me and jaemin, and jeno tonight

rainbow demon: hhhhhh i'm sorry i'm rly tired

demon rainbow: sigh
demon rainbow: see that's what we're not gonna do
demon rainbow: i'm not letting you avoid me nor your friends
demon rainbow: so either you are in jaemin's room by seven
demon rainbow: or we're invading your room at half past seven xoxo uwu

rainbow demon: but renjunnnnnnnnn

demon rainbow: you were and still are upset because mark kept avoiding you
demon rainbow: i'm not letting you do the same to me
demon rainbow: and i'm not letting you come to the point in which we start avoiding you as well because we have become... strangers
demon rainbow: so even if you are tired (which i doubt you are), we're coming over
demon rainbow: let me save our relationship before it's too late, okay
demon rainbow: as fucking dramatic as it sounds

rainbow demon: okay
rainbow demon: i'll be there

demon rainbow: thank you
demon rainbow: i love you

rainbow demon: that's gay

demon rainbow: donghyuck,,, we're both,,, gay

rainbow demon: fair enough, i love you too

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[7:48 am]

demon rainbow: hyuck
demon rainbow: are you with jeno
demon rainbow: 'cause i woke up next to jaemin
demon rainbow: and my head hurts rly badly so i don't even want to try to remember what happened last night
demon rainbow: but i do know that we drank,,,, too much,,,
demon rainbow: my head is blowing up

rainbow demon: my PHONE is blowing up from you
rainbow demon: but same
rainbow demon: wait
rainbow demon: WAIT WHAT

demon rainbow: wait what, what

rainbow demon: I THOUGHT I WAS WITH YOU

demon rainbow: i mean, yeah, yesterday
demon rainbow: but we somehow changed
demon rainbow: so you should be with jeno now???

rainbow demon: i CAN'T BELIEVE
rainbow demon: I'VE BEEN AWAKE FOR AN HOUR ALREADY
rainbow demon: AND I THOUGHT IT WAS YOU CUDDLING ME
rainbow demon: SO I DIDN'T TURN SO I DON'T WAKE YOU UP
rainbow demon: I'M THE WORST BOYFRIEND
rainbow demon: I CAN'T EVEN RECOGNIZE THAT IT'S NOT YOU CUDDLING ME

demon rainbow: SKSJKS BITCH
demon rainbow: that's fair tho
demon rainbow: i was very shocked to wake up to being the big spoon
demon rainbow: so i was like "that's a change"

rainbow demon: yeah bc you always change ur position when you fall asleep and never admit it

demon rainbow: excuse me, it's you doing that, i'm never the small spoon willingly
demon rainbow: you know that

rainbow demon: BITCH WHAT
rainbow demon: WE BOTH KNOW THAT'S NOT TRUE
rainbow demon: don't even TRY to lie

demon rainbow: shut up
demon rainbow: n e way i'm gonna make a gc with us and jaemin and jeno
demon rainbow: 'cause we don't remember ANYTHING
demon rainbow: wake up jeno as well
demon rainbow: maybe he remembers something

rainbow demon: okay uwu

 

[demon rainbow has created a group chat '00 pals']
[demon rainbow added sk8r boi, rainbow demon, and dancy pants]
[8:03 am]

demon rainbow: does anyone, like, remember anything past the second drink
demon rainbow: 'cause i can vaguely remember me and hyuck making out and jaemin taking him away from me
demon rainbow: but past that? blank

dancy pants: how the heck did you make out with him
dancy pants: he has hickeys all over his neck sksksk

demon rainbow: i
demon rainbow: i don't even know how to do hickeys

sk8r boi: JENO
sk8r boi: YOU DO THAT ALL THE TIME
sk8r boi: YOU FUCKING LEECH
sk8r boi: @rainbow demon i am so sorry for my boyfriend, he's useless

dancy pants: i thought you loved me

sk8r boi: thought wrong

dancy pants: wow
dancy pants: @demon rainbow i'm stealing hyuck, he'd treat me better

demon rainbow: i don't approve of this

dancy pants: you can take jaemin
dancy pants: he loves you more anyway :((

sk8r boi: yes
sk8r boi: you don't have a choice renjun, it's been done, ur mine now, sorry hyuck

rainbow demon: so is this our life now

demon rainbow: i guess so
demon rainbow: there's no point in complaining

rainbow demon: fair enoufg

demon rainbow: enoufg

rainbow demon: not my fault
rainbow demon: i can spell mostly
rainbow demon: but jeno decided to make out w me out of a sudden

demon rainbow: wow jaemin would never

sk8r boi: challenge accepted

demon rainbow: c-challenge done

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[8:29 am]

demon rainbow: i'm dying here
demon rainbow: like, heavily dying
demon rainbow: pls help

rainbow demon: can't
rainbow demon: i'm dying as well
rainbow demon: perhapth i like another certain perthon too
rainbow demon: and that
rainbow demon: just death

demon rainbow: owo
demon rainbow: but same
demon rainbow: i can't
demon rainbow: survive this
demon rainbow: do you want to run away and go eat breakfast instead

rainbow demon: yes pls

demon rainbow: okay let's go
demon rainbow: see you there?

rainbow demon: yeah okay uwu

Chapter Text

[group chat '00 pals']
[9:52 am]

demon rainbow: hyuck
demon rainbow: are you back in your room, sweetheart

rainbow demon: yeah

demon rainbow: feeling alright? do you want me to come over?

rainbow demon: no i'm alright don't worry

sk8r boi: did something happen??

dancy pants: ^??

rainbow demon: no it's all good
rainbow demon: it's just that i've been avoiding mark for a while
rainbow demon: obviously
rainbow demon: and i forgot to ask taeyong if mark was eating breakfast at that moment
rainbow demon: and he was
rainbow demon: so yeah, we ate breakfast in a Very Awkward Silence

demon rainbow: taeyong looked like he was going to faint, seeing you in the same room

rainbow demon: understandable
rainbow demon: but yeah
rainbow demon: that
rainbow demon: by the way, i think i'm gonna go out with xuxi today
rainbow demon: he asked me the other day and i didn't go

demon rainbow: alright, love
demon rainbow: have fun

rainbow demon: uwu ily

demon rainbow: uwu ilyt

sk8r boi: disgusting
sk8r boi: i love it

 

[private chat with :D]
[10:03 am]

rainbow demon: hey xuxi!!

:D : hiii

rainbow demon: do you want to go out today uwu

:D : HECK YECK
:D : DO YOU WANT TO GO ANYWHERE SPECIFIC
:D: BC I'LL GO ANYWHERE WITH YOU

rainbow demon: xuxi i LOVE you

:D : I LOVE YOU MORE

rainbow demon: impossible
rainbow demon: you might be giant but my love for you? gianter

:D : i'm lov u
:D : kith

rainbow demon: MWAH
rainbow demon: but i don't have anywhere specific i wanna go
rainbow demon: so let's just go anywhere
rainbow demon: as long as i'm with you, it'll be splendid u-uwu

:D : UWU
:D : WHEN DO YOU WANT TO GO

rainbow demon: noon or so?

:D : that's great
:D : i'll pick you up then
:D : and we can go for some ice cream uwu
:D : or somewhere else if you don't want ice cream
:D : anywhere with you uwu

rainbow demon: :(( u make me so happy

:D : CAN'T HANDLE THAT
:D : KITHKITHKITH
:D : LOVE YOU LOTS

rainbow demon: i love you, too, xuxi

:D : I'M COMING OVER NOW
:D : CAN'T WAIT UNTIL NOON
:D : I NEED TO HUG YOU NOW

rainbow demon: ksksj okay uwu
rainbow demon: you're still going to have to wait until i get ready, though

:D : I DON'T MIND
:D : I COULD WAIT AN ETERNITY FOR YOU

rainbow demon: ksjjssj i'd wait for you too, bub
rainbow demon: for an eternity and more
rainbow demon: love you
rainbow demon: get here soon, i want a hug from my giant <3

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[9:37 pm]

rainbow demon: hey xuxi
rainbow demon: thank you for today
rainbow demon: i had an amazing time
rainbow demon: and i love you so much, you can't even imagine
rainbow demon: really, you are one of the most thoughtful and positive people i know
rainbow demon: and i admire that so much
rainbow demon: jungwoo is really lucky to have a boyfriend like you
rainbow demon: and i'm more than just lucky to have a friend like you

:D : hyuckie :(( i'm love you
:D : you know i can't deal with softness >:(

rainbow demon: i know, i'm sorry
rainbow demon: it's just soft hours and you deserve them more than anyone

:D : i love you

rainbow demon: i love you too, so so much
rainbow demon: i'm going to go to sleep soon
rainbow demon: so goodnight, sleep well, sweet dreams

:D : you too baby!! i lov u!! you deserve the bestest dreams!!

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[9:51 pm]

rainbow demon: hey renjun
rainbow demon: can i ask you a question

demon rainbow: sure, love, what is it

rainbow demon: do you think it was wrong for me to argue with mark
rainbow demon: like
rainbow demon: should i be the first one to apologize, was i the one at fault
rainbow demon: be honest, i won't be mad

demon rainbow: i think both of you were in the wrong
demon rainbow: and that you should give it more time
demon rainbow: as time goes on, you'll both understand who will apologize first
demon rainbow: you shouldn't have blown up on him but talked to him
demon rainbow: but that's understandable, we're human, emotions are hard to control
demon rainbow: but mark shouldn't have avoided you and kept to himself whatever it is he is keeping to himself

rainbow demon: oh okay
rainbow demon: thank you
rainbow demon: i love you

demon rainbow: i love you too, sweetheart
demon rainbow: do you want me to come over?

rainbow demon: no it's alright i'm going to sleep anyway
rainbow demon: do you think we can go out tomorrow?
rainbow demon: i need some foundation bc mine finished today
rainbow demon: fucking jeno ksjsjs i can't believe that my neck is literally all bruised from him

demon rainbow: he's a dumbass and we both love him

rainbow demon: that is true and i hate that
rainbow demon: i can't believe that it took one night of just cuddling and kissing for me to fucking fall for him, he's such an idiot
rainbow demon: doing that is illegal
rainbow demon: especially when we've done that before already??
rainbow demon: how was this time different????

demon rainbow: i doubt it was just this time
demon rainbow: it was just... all the time together and you only realised now, y'know
demon rainbow: also you know what i just realised

rainbow demon: what

demon rainbow: if you combine jeno and jaemin into one person, you get the perfect kisser
demon rainbow: like
demon rainbow: you get soft lips from jeno but the technique from jaemin

rainbow demon: omg ur a genius
rainbow demon: or we could buy lip balm for jaemin and not have to combine them into one

demon rainbow: fair point
demon rainbow: also wth we're crushing on all the same people

rainbow demon: not all
rainbow demon: i also like mark
rainbow demon: for some reason

demon rainbow: ...
demon rainbow: ...

rainbow demon: oh no, you too?

demon rainbow: i can neither confirm nor deny this

rainbow demon: well that's certainly fun
rainbow demon: and yes, then we are indeed crushing on the same people
rainbow demon: good luck with mark, he's,,,, dense

demon rainbow: thicc

rainbow demon: No.
rainbow demon: that one text alone made me want to go sleep it off
rainbow demon: hopefully i forget what it said by morning

demon rainbow: ksjjsj goodnight, sweetheart, i love you, sleep well

rainbow demon: goodnight uwu i'll still evaluate if i love you bc what you said? cursed

demon rainbow: :(

rainbow demon: evaluation complete, i love you, goodnight, sweet dreams

Chapter Text

[group chat '127']
[8:07 am]

actual angel: dance practice in an hour
actual angel: please everyone be there on time, guys
actual angel: the earlier we start, the earlier we can finish

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[8:09 am]

rainbow demon: renjunnnnn
rainbow demon: pls save me

demon rainbow: what

rainbow demon: i totally forgot that 127 have a dance practice
rainbow demon: everyone
rainbow demon: mark's going to be there
rainbow demon: for hours
rainbow demon: and hours
rainbow demon: and i genuinely think i'm going to cry if i see him longer than what i saw him yesterday

demon rainbow: baby :((
demon rainbow: it's going to be alright
demon rainbow: it'll be only good for you, you have to get used to seeing him again
demon rainbow: we're all in the same group after all

rainbow demon: i guess so
rainbow demon: i just don't know who to talk to there
rainbow demon: what if they all hate me now because i argued with mark

demon rainbow: they don't, baby
demon rainbow: you argued with mark only, not with anyone else

rainbow demon: but taeyong and johnny are dating mark
rainbow demon: and taeyong and johnny are dating the others
rainbow demon: and the others are dating the others and so on
rainbow demon: what if they have all decided to hate me now

demon rainbow: they haven't, sweetheart
demon rainbow: taeyong wouldn't have insisted on taking care of you back then baby
demon rainbow: mark doesn't hate you either
demon rainbow: no one does
demon rainbow: okay?

rainbow demon: hpw do uou know that

demon rainbow: hyuckie sweetheart please trust me
demon rainbow: no one hates you

rainbow demon: what id they do

demon rainbow: they really don't
demon rainbow: do you want me to come over

rainbow demon: no i'm panicking i dont wat you to see me like thsi

demon rainbow: i've seen you panicking before, sweetheart, please let me help you

rainbow demon: noi ll deal with it
rainbow demon: din't worry o'm fine

demon rainbow: i can see that you're not, baby
demon rainbow: please let me help you

rainbow demon: no i have to het readu it's okay i'm calmin down already don't worry
rainbow demon: we can hanf our later

demon rainbow: are you really going to be okay?

rainbow demon: i pronmise
rainbow demon: i love you so much

demon rainbow: i love you too

 

[group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[8:24 am]

demon rainbow: taeyong or johnny, please talk to hyuck at the practice
demon rainbow: i'm pretty sure he's panicking now and he told me not to come over and i don't want to bother him if he wants to be alone
demon rainbow: and he said that he thinks that everyone in 127 hates him now for arguing with mark
demon rainbow: so yeah, if you could talk to him and kinda just casually make it known that you aren't mad at him would be good

here's Johnald: okay, we will

actual angel: alright
actual angel: thank you for telling us!!

Chapter Text

[group chat '00 pals']
[8:49 pm]

rainbow demon: guys
rainbow demon: can you please come over

dancy pants: is everything alright?

rainbow demon: no, i'm upset
rainbow demon: and i think that being with you guys would help me

dancy pants: jaemin and i are on our way

demon rainbow: so am i

 

[group chat 'mark's boyfies']
[9:03 pm]

country boy: can anyone come over please

actual angel: i can

country boy: thank you

actual angel: are you okay, baby?

country boy: i don't know
country boy: i don't really feel like,,, anything
country boy: i feel like i'm upset
country boy: but very distinctly, y'know?
country boy: that makes no sense
country boy: i feel like i'm upset but at the same time i feel just... nothing

actual angel: baby...
actual angel: i'll take some hot cocoa with me
actual angel: and we can watch a bad drama together, sounds good?

country boy: yeah
country boy: thank you
country boy: i love you

actual angel: i love you too

cool dad: can i join too?

country boy: please do

cool dad: okay, i'll be there
cool dad: i love you

country boy: i love you more

 

[group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[9:23 pm]

demon rainbow: hyuck's really upset from seeing mark today

actual angel: mark is too
actual angel: he hasn't rly said anything since we came over
actual angel: but i can see how upset he is
actual angel: like, before he at least tried to joke
actual angel: but now he's just... silent

demon rainbow: hyuck cried
demon rainbow: we started watching a movie just now though
demon rainbow: so now we're all just lying in bed and taking turns on who is hugging hyuck

actual angel: who's we

demon rainbow: jeno, jaemin and i
demon rainbow: he asked us to come over

actual angel: ah, that's good
actual angel: stay with him

demon rainbow: we will

Chapter Text

[private chat with country boy]
[3:22 am]

rainbow demon: hi

country boy: hey

rainbow demon: i'm sorry
rainbow demon: i shouldn't have blown up on you that day
rainbow demon: i miss you

country boy: i miss you too
country boy: it's okay
country boy: i was being dumb
country boy: and you're right, i was avoiding you
country boy: and i shouldn't have
country boy: i'm sorry
country boy: i love you

rainbow demon: i love you too
rainbow demon: why were you avoiding me, though

country boy: promise not to laugh?

rainbow demon: are you a child

country boy: yes

rainbow demon: fine

country boy: i realized that i like you
country boy: and when i... like someone
country boy: i tend to avoid them
country boy: and just hope it goes away

rainbow demon: you
rainbow demon: absolute idiot
rainbow demon: did you not think that i could like you back even for 0.1 second
rainbow demon: USE YOUR LAST BRAIN CELL ACCORDINGLY

country boy: it left me a long time ago

rainbow demon: take a half of mine, that should do the trick

country boy: no, you clearly need it more than i do

rainbow demon: EXCUSE ME
rainbow demon: WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

country boy: no comment
country boy: um anyway
country boy: i miss you
country boy: and i want to see you

rainbow demon: living room?

country boy: be there in five

rainbow demon: alright
rainbow demon: i might be there a bit later 'cause i have to avoid waking up jaemin, jeno, and renjun

country boy: yeah i have to do the same with kun and taeyong ksjsjs

 

[3:57 am]

rainbow demon: shh don't wake anyone up

country boy: i'm not that loud

rainbow demon: you are, you dumbdumb

country boy: :c

rainbow demon: no :c, then i'll be :c too
rainbow demon: that's illegal
rainbow demon: i don't want to be :c again

country boy: c:
country boy: better?

rainbow demon: way better
rainbow demon: mwah

country boy: u-uwu
country boy: lov you

rainbow demon: love you more

country boy: no you don't

rainbow demon: yes i do

country boy: no you don't
country boy: hello my name is mark and donghyuck loves me more

rainbow demon: see you admitted it yourself

country boy: THAT'S NOT FAIR
country boy: YOU TOOK MY PHONE

rainbow demon: everyone has their own strategies to get what they want, bitch

country boy: hey don't be mean to me :c
country boy: i'm going to be sad
country boy: sad and sleepy mark is not a good mark

rainbow demon: shhh
rainbow demon: let's sleep
rainbow demon: i'm comfortable just like this with you by my side

country boy: okay
country boy: move a bit to the left and we can sleep

rainbow demon: alright
rainbow demon: goodnight mark
rainbow demon: i love you lots

country boy: goodnight hyuckie
country boy: i love you more, baby

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[8:49 am]

demon rainbow: where are you?

[9:00 am]

demon rainbow: hyuck
demon rainbow: where the heck are you
demon rainbow: we're worried
demon rainbow: text me or answer my calls?

[9:13 am]

demon rainbow: lee donghyuck
demon rainbow: if you don't think i'm going to lead a worldwide search for you, you are incredibly wrong

 

[group chat 'mark&hyuck']
[9:14 am]

demon rainbow: guys not to alarm you but we can't find hyuck??

actual angel: for fuck's sake
actual angel: we have no idea where mark is either

demon rainbow: um???
demon rainbow: should we be concerned?????

actual angel: well i already am
actual angel: go look around the dorms
actual angel: kun and i are doing that as well

demon rainbow: okay

 

[9:36 am]

actual angel: I FOUND THEM

demon rainbow: ???
demon rainbow: where???
demon rainbow: wait
demon rainbow: THEM??? ARE THEY TOGETHER???

actual angel: YES
actual angel: THEY ARE CUDDLING
actual angel: I CAN'T EVEN BE MAD
actual angel: FINALLY
actual angel: I THINK I'M CRYING

cool dad: you are

actual angel: i think that's pretty valid coming from me

cool dad: definitely
cool dad: come here, you crybaby, let's leave them to sleep

actual angel: okay uwu

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[9:52 am]

demon rainbow: you've been found, dw
demon rainbow: but still do text me when you can
demon rainbow: i love you i hope you're sleeping well, sweetheart

[10:42 am]

rainbow demon: hey renjunnie
rainbow demon: i'm sorry my phone was on silent and i thought i would wake up earlier
rainbow demon: i didn't mean to make you worry :((

demon rainbow: that's okay!!
demon rainbow: i'm glad you and mark are okay now
demon rainbow: you are, right?

rainbow demon: yeah, better than ever!!

demon rainbow: i'm happy for you two
demon rainbow: did you talk it out? why did he avoid you

rainbow demon: um
rainbow demon: he uh
rainbow demon: he likes me
rainbow demon: and when he likes someone, he avoids them apparently
rainbow demon: so yeah

demon rainbow: you sound way less excited than i thought you would be
demon rainbow: did you talk about it?
demon rainbow: are you gonna date??

rainbow demon: we didn't talk about it aaaaaaa
rainbow demon: i didn't want to make it awkward immediately hhh
rainbow demon: that's why i don't sound as excited as i should :(((

demon rainbow: eye
demon rainbow: you absolute fucking dumbasses
demon rainbow: can y'all t a l k

rainbow demon: ...
rainbow demon: let's have mark start that conversation

demon rainbow: he is,,, never going to

rainbow demon: don't you say hm

demon rainbow: hyuck PLEASE
demon rainbow: i won't be able to take more of you going "OH MY GOD MARK'S SO PERFECT CAN HE DATE ME ALREADY PLEASE"

rainbow demon: i have NEVER said that
rainbow demon: not to you, not to anyone
rainbow demon: that's defamation

demon rainbow: it's an accurate impression of you, okay

rainbow demon: no :((

demon rainbow: stop the :(( go spend time with mark ksksk
demon rainbow: i need to go take a shower

rainbow demon: hope you drown
rainbow demon: love you uwu

demon rainbow: bitch
demon rainbow: love you too

Chapter Text

[group chat 'dreamies and a nightmare']
[11:00 am]
[country boy added rainbow demon]

rainbow demon: sup binches

tall baby: owo

rainbow demon: mark remove me pls
rainbow demon: or remove jisung, both work

[country boy removed tall baby]

rainbow demon: noT LITERALLY SKSKDDJ

[rainbow demon added tall baby]

rainbow demon: don't owo

tall baby: òwó

rainbow demon: that's... better

sk8r boi: HYUCK
sk8r boi: WE WERE WORRIED YOU DUMBASS
sk8r boi: I'M GLAD THAT YOU AND MARK ARE OKAY NOW
sk8r boi: BUT YOU CAN'T JUST SUDDENLY RUN AWAY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HECKING NIGHT
sk8r boi: but i'm really glad that you and mark are okay now, bby
sk8r boi: a bit longer and i would've literally locked you both in a room together and not let you out until you talked

rainbow demon: if you did that, i would've literally decked both you and mark
rainbow demon: no offense to mark currently uwu ilysm

country boy: none taken uwu ilym

demon rainbow: that's gay
demon rainbow: disgusting
demon rainbow: also mark pls return hyuck to his room by 10 pm

rainbow demon: owo do we have something planned?

tall baby: why can you owo but not me
tall baby: that's unfair

rainbow demon: bc life's unfair
rainbow demon: and i'm me
rainbow demon: i'm allowed to do everything

demon rainbow: no we don't
demon rainbow: i just don't want you to get lost again
demon rainbow: so both of you should either be together in hyuck's room or in ur separate rooms

country boy: okay mom
country boy: can i stay with u tonight hyuck uwu

rainbow demon: i'd literally physically attach myself to you if you tried to leave
rainbow demon: warn your boyfriends that i'm stealing you for the next three to five business days

country boy: wouldn't take it any other way
country boy: @demon rainbow i am also stealing hyuck from u for a while

demon rainbow: that's fair
demon rainbow: @sk8r boi @dancy pants i'm hanging out with you guys
demon rainbows: whether you want it or not

dancy pants: we always want to hang out with you uwu

rainbow demon: disgusting and gay

dancy pants: you just described literally everyone here
dancy pants: also mwah ily

rainbow demon: ksjsjsj ilym mwah

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[11:16 am]

demon rainbow: hi hyuckie uwu
demon rainbow: i wanted to ask
demon rainbow: what are our uhh boundaries

rainbow demon: wdym

demon rainbow: like, i can cuddle with jaemin and jeno
demon rainbow: i mean like our relationship-wise
demon rainbow: how far can i go with jaemin and jeno
demon rainbow: is ummm kissing too far or

rainbow demon: no!! kiss them all u want uwu
rainbow demon: same goes for telling them you like them and starting to date them
rainbow demon: i'm expecting an announcement soon >:((

demon rainbow: oh okay uwu
demon rainbow: there won't be any announcement though

rainbow demon: do the same things go for me and mark/jeno/jaemin?

demon rainbow: yeah definitely!!!
demon rainbow: thank u for answering uwu
demon rainbow: i love you

rainbow demon: i love you too uwu

Chapter Text

[private chat with i'm the only ten you see]
[4:52 pm]

demon rainbow: hey ten

i'm the only ten you see: oh no, a child, what do you need

demon rainbow: i promise i won't take long
demon rainbow: i was wondering whether i could ask you a question?

i'm the only ten you see: sure, you've already messaged me, i don't see how it could get any worse

demon rainbow: you don't have to if you don't want to
demon rainbow: i can figure it out myself

i'm the only ten you see: i was hoping that you knew by now that i speak in sarcasm exclusively
i'm the only ten you see: ask whatever you want

demon rainbow: okay
demon rainbow: it's okay if you don't want to answer, i get that it's personal, but... how did you figure out that you were agender?

i'm the only ten you see: oh
i'm the only ten you see: i don't really know. i just knew that i felt neither as a guy nor a girl, did some research and realized that the label agender fits me best
i'm the only ten you see: it's very individual for everyone, though
i'm the only ten you see: assuming you're asking for yourself, just... don't rush to conclusions, do your research and you'll understand in your own time
i'm the only ten you see: though i doubt you'll get anywhere by thinking about it a lot, so just leave the thought for a while, try out different pronouns in your head, think of how you want to be seen by the society and such
i'm the only ten you see: that kinda helped me as well

demon rainbow: thank you
demon rainbow: i really appreciate it

i'm the only ten you see: no problem, love
i'm the only ten you see: tell me what conclusion you reach when you do?

demon rainbow: i will
demon rainbow: i love you, thank you

i'm the only ten you see: disgusting but i love you too, small child

demon rainbow: we're literally the same height

i'm the only ten you see: yeah but i'm old
i'm the only ten you see: you're still young and fresh, i remember my youth...

demon rainbow: you're... four years older than me
demon rainbow: that makes you middle aged at best

i'm the only ten you see: excuse me
i'm the only ten you see: i did nothing to deserve such slander

demon rainbow: you literally called yourself old, i think i don't deserve to be called out for it smh

i'm the only ten you see: you do and shut up and you have no manners, the absolute disrespect, i can't handle it

demon rainbow: you deserve it
demon rainbow: F̨̗̪̯͎͉͓̘̯̝̟̫͈̥̰͍̊̂̎͂̓ͨ͘͢͝ơ̧̮̬͇͓̙̫̦̺̯̠̙ͣ͋́̿͐͘r̶̴̡͍̣̘̗̦ͯ̐̏͋̅̈ͭ̆̊̓̈̎̓ͭͦ̚ ̷̢͕̲̰̝͙̊ͪͥ̽ͩ͢͢͜A̹̫͓̬̜͙̘̼͐̒̏͊ͨ͘͟ͅlͫͫ̈̀͐̄̉͐̅̽͊̚͜͏̼͔͎͍̠̟͚̜̻̱̯̻̫l̡̺̥͙̘͙͖̘̖̦̜͎̹̦̫̇ͧ̇͗̐ͥ̇̋ͨ̃̽̇ͧͨ͒̂͗ͅ ̧̱̺͉̺̲̗͈̫̪͈̖̩̯̳̗̳̥̭̰̈́ͭͮ̓͡Y̸̨͈̗̱̺̮͚̥͎̖̟̮̔̍ͧ͑ͩͭ̃͑̒̂̽̃͞͡ǫ̵͇̪̣͕͇̮̥̹̖̫̱̪ͤ̄͌̚u̬̟̥̹̣̩̫̙͉͎͕͉̗̳͓̱̟̐ͪ̉̑̀̔ͨ͗̌̊̓́̿͞͠ͅ ̢̛̟͍̤̦̤̦̤̰̳͔̰̹͍̠̭ͥ̀̓̏͂̋̈̒͑̾͂͂ͭ̇͑ͩ͘͟͜ͅH̷̯̰̗̞̠̰͍̮̹̤͚̦̐́̑̑͑ͥ̈̒ͬ̆̎̒ͩͦ̌͑̎̕a̽͗ͥ͐́̆̅̚҉̡̨̜̠͇̪̩͓̺͇̖̘̙̖̩͇̜̺͉v͓̯̩͚̘̱͑ͥ̍̇̅̐͘͜͢͞ͅe̵̢̦̫̰̖̺͍͔͈̳̬̞͉̍̈͆ͨ͋̈́ͫͩ̏̽ͯ͛ͮ͆̈́ͯͯͦͩ͘ ̶̷̪̭̬͎̺͖͇̪̟̝̿̓͊ͯ̓̉̂ͦͩ̍̅̓͋͒͑͜͠D̸ͦ̄ͮ͛͊̌̀̆͗̉̏̽ͣ͟͏̶̜͖̼̭̺̙ơ̴̴͕͍̗͖̤ͯ̅̓̑̄ͭ̑̄͐̊́̽̈̊ͬͦͅn̸̴̨̲̳̫̤̮̯̠̳̞̬̤̺͍̣̖̠̖̾̏ͨͯ̐̂͊͛̈́̍ͦ͗̚͜͠e̢̨͋́̈́̿̕҉̮̼͉̱̳̦̩͇̫̻͇̰̖̳ͅ

i'm the only ten you see: go away you fucking demon

demon rainbow: who, me?
demon rainbow: i'm a delight, an angel, why would you say that

i'm the only ten you see: i'm blocking you, you toddler bitch

demon rainbow: wow fuck you, you grandperson

i'm the only ten you see: don't swear at your elders, child

demon rainbow: i'll do whatever i want and you cannot stop me

Chapter Text

[private chat with sk8r boi]
[6:28 pm]

demon rainbow: hey nana

sk8r boi: hi!!
sk8r boi: how are u loml
sk8r boi: have you eaten
sk8r boi: have you been properly kissed today
sk8r boi: have you had enough hugs

demon rainbow: ekjdjd nana ily
demon rainbow: i'm good uwu i was wondering if i could hang out with you guys tonight

sk8r boi: yes of course uwu
sk8r boi: come on over bby
sk8r boi: *bub
sk8r boi: lmao i can't type

demon rainbow: you only noticed now?
demon rainbow: dumbass

sk8r boi: hey don't be mean to me :(
sk8r boi: or i'll have to punish you >:(

demon rainbow: you punish me?
demon rainbow: lmao i'd love to see that, bitch

sk8r boi: you'll be punished with At Least 5 make-out sessions whenever i please (but also only when you wanna bc ily and i don't want u to be uncomfortable uwu)
sk8r boi: see, i can punish you >:(

demon rainbow: Oh No What Ever Will I Do
demon rainbow: you're so cruel

sk8r boi: it's what you asked for
sk8r boi: i'm sorry, i have to do it

 

[private chat with dancy pants]
[6:51 pm]

sk8r boi: hey renjun's gonna be coming over
sk8r boi: do you think we could... confess to him
sk8r boi: i could ask hyuckie

dancy pants: i guess we should
dancy pants: we've been hiding it for long enough

sk8r boi: alright
sk8r boi: i'll ask hyuck then uwu ily

dancy pants: ilyt <3 uwu

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[7:09 pm]

sk8r boi: hi hyuck
sk8r boi: can we talk

rainbow demon: oh no should i be scared
rainbow demon: but yeah sure

sk8r boi: ...jeno and i uhh like your boyfriend
sk8r boi: and we were wondering if we could, like, confess to him,,,

rainbow demon: i mean that was obvious
rainbow demon: fucking FINALLY
rainbow demon: let me know how it goes

sk8r boi: that was easier than i thought

rainbow demon: what did you expect
rainbow demon: i'm not a demon
rainbow demon: i mean,,, my screen name suggests something else
rainbow demon: but yeah skjsjs

sk8r boi: no you're an angel and i love you uwu

rainbow demon: skjdhd shut up

sk8r boi: say it back :(

rainbow demon: i LOVE you >:( uwu
rainbow demon: mwah kith kith

sk8r boi: save those kithes until we see each other uwu

rainbow demon: save those kithes for renjun

sk8r boi: there's enough for everybody uwu

rainbow demon: there can never be enough kisses for renjun, nana
rainbow demon: if you want to date my boyfriend, you have to know that

sk8r boi: oh that's true
sk8r boi: that is absolutely correct and you're right and i'm sorry

rainbow demon: yeah you better
rainbow demon: ...but do save some kithes for me

sk8r boi: always have and always will uwu
sk8r boi: there's always a stash just for you

rainbow demon: uwu

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[8:36 am]

actual angel: hii!!

cool dad: hi sweetheart <3

actual angel: i was just wondering if we could go somewhere today?
actual angel: y'know, to a cafe or something?

cool dad: oh, sorry, i'm already going out with youngho today :((
cool dad: we talked about it ages ago already

actual angel: oh
actual angel: alright, have fun

cool dad: we can go somewhere tomorrow?

actual angel: yeah sure don't worry about it

 

[group chat '00 pals']
[11:07 am]

[dancy pants changed group name to '00 boyfriends + friend']

sk8r boi: that's not what i told you to change it to
sk8r boi: sigh i have to do it all by myself huh

[sk8r boi changed group name to 'bye-sexual bois']

sk8r boi: we can't have pals in the group name anymore bc we're all dating renjun now uwu
sk8r boi: this seemed like a good alternative

rainbow demon: FINALLY
rainbow demon: I'M HAPPY FOR Y'ALL AND SO IS MARK
rainbow demon: also i'm not bi but aight

sk8r boi: someday you'll come to your senses and understand that you are
sk8r boi: someday, my child

rainbow demon: nana
rainbow demon: shut the fuck up
rainbow demon: i'm not going to kiss you anymore if you say that

sk8r boi: NO I'M SORRY I TAKE MY WORDS BACK
sk8r boi: I CAN'T LOSE YOU AND YOUR PERFECT LIPS

rainbow demon: i- i don't know what to say to that
rainbow demon: t-thank you OwO
rainbow demon: i-ily

dancy pants: he has a speech impediment now, look what you've done to the poor boy
dancy pants: ugh nana your power

rainbow demon: KSKSKS SHUT UP

dancy pants: did you mean
dancy pants: *K-KSKSKS SHUT UP

rainbow demon: y-yeth

sk8r boi: uwu :D

rainbow demon: where have you put my boyfriend though
rainbow demon: why did i not get to know it from him

sk8r boi: he's sleeping shhh
sk8r boi: he looks so adorable :((

rainbow demon: IKR
rainbow demon: HE LOOKS SO FUCKING ADORABLE AND PRETTY WHEN HE'S SLEEPING
rainbow demon: HE ALWAYS DOES BUT LIKE, EXTRA

sk8r boi: i fucking AGREE

dancy pants: i third this statement
dancy pants: renjun is the only boy

sk8r boi: yes

rainbow demon: yes
rainbow demon: he's the embodiment of cuteness even if he's a tiny bit demonic uwu

dancy pants: "tiny bit"

rainbow demon: very demonically cute uwu
rainbow demon: also i hope you've given him enough kisses >:(

dancy pants: yes
dancy pants: also pls share some foundation with him uwu

rainbow demon: i
rainbow demon: jeno why do you do that

sk8r boi: i'm making him buy me a new foundation whenever i get a hickey from him uwu

dancy pants: it's so expensive hhh
dancy pants: not fair bc you like it too

sk8r boi: it's fair
sk8r boi: :(

dancy pants: NANA STOP POUTING YOU KNOW THAT I CAN'T REFUSE YOU LIKE THAT
dancy pants: ...
dancy pants: you're right it's not fair

rainbow demon: that's weak
rainbow demon: you're weak, jeno

dancy pants: only for nana and renjun :(

rainbow demon: disgusting

dancy pants: [picture of renjun sleeping and jaemin pouting attached, looking very cute]

rainbow demon: ...
rainbow demon: must,,, resist,,,
rainbow demon: they're c*te ig

sk8r boi: hyuckie you know that you like me :((
sk8r boi: don't censor my cuteness

rainbow demon: ,,,...
rainbow demon: no comment

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[1:28 pm]

country boy: hyuck

rainbow demon: i've been gone for TWELVE MINUTES
rainbow demon: it's like you don't even want snacks smh

country boy: hhhh shut up
country boy: i just wanted to ask

rainbow demon: what

country boy: the other day at breakfast
country boy: when we weren't talking,,,
country boy: yķnow nvm uwu

rainbow demon: ???
rainbow demon: mark lee i'll literally punch you if you don't ask in a matter of seven seconds

country boy: it's stupid and irrelevant skjds
country boy: really, nothing, dw about it

rainbow demon: three seconds

country boy: hh
country boy: you had hickeys that morning and i just ,,,,,,
country boy: i wanted to ask who gave them to you but that doesn't matter so dw

rainbow demon: jeno
rainbow demon: we got drunk and somehow i ended up waking up next to jeno instead of renjun
rainbow demon: and apparently it's a bad habit of his to give hickeys to people
rainbow demon: and apparently this time around i was the (un)lucky boy

country boy: ah
country boy: okay

rainbow demon: for why do you ask

country boy: nothing, it was dumb, sorry

rainbow demon: owo is someone jealous?

country boy: noo
country boy: just asking
country boy: i was just wondering
country boy: i don't get jealous
country boy: and we aren't even dating so i wouldn't

rainbow demon: yet
rainbow demon: i mean what
rainbow demon: typos! haha!

country boy: ...
country boy: sure
country boy: do you uh
country boy: still,,, like me?

rainbow demon: yeah, i do

country boy: ah

rainbow demon: "ah"
rainbow demon: i can't believe that's what you say to that
rainbow demon: "ah"

country boy: shut up

rainbow demon: istg i have to do everything alone in this house
rainbow demon: dorm
rainbow demon: sigh
rainbow demon: doyouwanttodateme
rainbow demon: there we go

country boy: oh my
country boy: yes
country boy: yes i do

rainbow demon: fuck yeah
rainbow demon: i'll be right back

 

[group chat 'bye-sexual bois']
[1:53 pm]

rainbow demon: GUESS WHO'S DATING MARK LEE

demon rainbow: taeyong?

dancy pants: johnny?

sk8r boi: kun?

rainbow demon: oh fuck you guys
rainbow demon: at least i've got mark now who's not gonna be mean to me smh

sk8r boi: i'm not mean
sk8r boi: kun deserved to be mentioned, he's kun

rainbow demon: you're excused
rainbow demon: but only you, nana
rainbow demon: my boyfriend and my boyfriend in law aren't >:(

sk8r boi: uwuwu ily

rainbow demon: ilym uwu
rainbow demon: i just realized that i have five boyfriends in law and two boyfriends

sk8r boi: i'm honoured to be your boyfriend
sk8r boi: in law i mean

rainbow demon: you should be

sk8r boi: it's too hard to write out every time though
sk8r boi: boyfriend in law
sk8r boi: if only there was a way to shorten it

rainbow demon: ... i'm going to not overthink that

dancy pants: bil

sk8r boi: you should definitely overthink that

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[6:19 pm]

actual angel: hey

cool dad: hi angel

actual angel: we need to talk

cool dad: oh?
cool dad: about what?

actual angel: things
actual angel: are you going to come over or shall i

cool dad: i can come
cool dad: is everything okay, love?

actual angel: not really, no
actual angel: that's why we need to talk

cool dad: okay
cool dad: i'll be there in a few then

actual angel: alright

 

[group chat 'kun's boyfies']
[7:35 pm]
[actual angel left]

here's Johnald: what??

cool dad: Later.

here's Johnald: are you okay?
here's Johnald: what happened?

cool dad: Youngho, please, later.

here's Johnald: okay
here's Johnald: do you want me to come over?

cool dad: No, thank you.

 

[private chat with actual angel]
[7:39 pm]

here's Johnald: taeyong??
here's Johnald: what happened??

actual angel: i can't
actual angel: talk
actual angel: right now
actual angel: i'm sorry

here's Johnald: baby, please
here's Johnald: are you okay? please let me come over

actual angel: no don't
actual angel: please
actual angel: don't
actual angel: i'm so sorry
actual angel: i just need some time alone
actual angel: please

here's Johnald: okay
here's Johnald: let me know if i can help, okay?

actual angel: okay
actual angel: thank you
actual angel: i'm sorry i love you

here's Johnald: i love you too

 

[group chat 'kun's boyfies']
[9:03 pm]

i'm the only ten you see: not to sound like a dick but
i'm the only ten you see: weren't you and taeyong the exact people that said if something happens between two of us, it affects everyone here and we all deal with it together no matter what it is
i'm the only ten you see: so what the hell happened
i'm the only ten you see: i'm not asking it out of curiosity and you know that

cool dad: it's... personal

i'm the only ten you see: yeah and when i argued with youngho, it was personal as well but it doesn't seem like y'all cared
i'm the only ten you see: you only meant good then, tormenting me with way more questions than needed
i'm the only ten you see: now i only mean good as well, so spill

cool dad: i don't think i should
cool dad: at least... not without taeyong's approval

i'm the only ten you see: yeah, well, he's not here right now, so

cool dad: we argued, okay
cool dad: i am mad at him but it's not my place to suddenly just say everything he said to everyone else
cool dad: i admit my wrongdoing as well but i apologized for it
cool dad: but there are certain things taeyong said as well
cool dad: and it wasn't only about me
cool dad: so i think you should ask taeyong that

i'm the only ten you see: okay
i'm the only ten you see: now that that's out of the way
i'm the only ten you see: do you want me to come over, love

cool dad: yes, please

i'm the only ten you see: can johnny come as well? he's worried

cool dad: of course

Chapter Text

[private chat with actual angel]
[9:52 pm]

i'm the only ten you see: so
i'm the only ten you see: what happened, how it happened, why it happened, spill

actual angel: i was being a dick
actual angel: case closed

i'm the only ten you see: as you always are but that doesn't answer my questions, so keep talking
i'm the only ten you see: and before you say anything about privacy 1) i don't care, 2) kun has agreed that you can say everything if you tell it as it happened

actual angel: i think it's something kun and i should deal with
actual angel: as in, the two of us

i'm the only ten you see: it affects everyone and you know it, so talk

actual angel: kun forgot our anniversary and went out with johnny instead
actual angel: the same thing happened last year
actual angel: so i got mad at him and said some shit that was really pent up in me since... years ago, i guess
actual angel: i yelled at him, he apologized and we should've ended it there
actual angel: but i couldn't just stop there because i had started talking and i just continued and continued
actual angel: and ended up saying things that aren't even relevant now
actual angel: they were relevant like... three years ago? i'm not sure at this point

i'm the only ten you see: what things, taeyong

actual angel: shitty things
actual angel: about how i felt when he proposed the idea of us dating other people
actual angel: i'm more than okay with it now, don't get me wrong, i'm happy
actual angel: or was, i guess
actual angel: but i just said how i felt useless and not needed when kun first started dating someone else
actual angel: and how shitty i felt when he favoured other people over me

i'm the only ten you see: you know he doesn't favour anyone, right
i'm the only ten you see: he loves all of us the same way
i'm the only ten you see: maybe you don't see it because you've been with him from the very start so it seems like you're getting less attention now than you used to back when it was just the two of you
i'm the only ten you see: but he doesn't favour anyone and tries to spend as much time with all of us while also dividing it equally

actual angel: i know
actual angel: i regret saying all of it, ten, i really do
actual angel: but it's how i felt and i told him that
actual angel: and maybe it's for the best
actual angel: there'll be more time for him to spend time with you guys
actual angel: maybe it just wasn't meant to be
actual angel: he doesn't deserve to be treated so badly, it's better this way

i'm the only ten you see: taeyong, no
i'm the only ten you see: you love him and he loves you. it's not for the best if both of you end up hurting so stop acting like an idiot, apologize to kun and you'll be okay again
actual angel: it's better /this/ way

actual angel: i don't mind myself hurting, it's what i deserve
actual angel: and it'll be better for kun and everyone else if we don't
actual angel: if we don't get back together
actual angel: he doesn't need someone like me

i'm the only ten you see: get your head out of your ass and use your brain, taeyong
i'm the only ten you see: he needs you just like you need him, you've been together for so long and neither of you will get over each other, especially if you literally live together, ending things is literally the worst thing you could do

actual angel: i love you, ten

i'm the only ten you see: i love you too, taeyong
i'm the only ten you see: please think about what i said, okay?
read: 10:20 pm

Chapter Text

[private chat with sk8r boi]
[12:18 pm]

demon rainbow: squints
demon rainbow: what are your intentions with my boyfriend

sk8r boi: which one of them

demon rainbow: the original one
demon rainbow: i expect a detailed answer, at least 200 words (you may include the ways how you're going to appreciate and respect him)

sk8r boi: i
sk8r boi: well
sk8r boi: you asked for it, give me a few

demon rainbow: hmm okay

sk8r boi: Motivational Letter.doc
sk8r boi: there u go

demon rainbow: i
demon rainbow: didn't expect that
demon rainbow: you've got the position, effective immediately

sk8r boi: wow you didn't even want to see me for an interview
sk8r boi: or ask hyuck for that matter,,

demon rainbow: listen, your motivational letter was outstanding, better than any applicant we've gotten ever
demon rainbow: and since when do we ask hyuck, i've got more brain cells than him anyway so i know better

sk8r boi: does my letter extend to include jeno as well
sk8r boi: or does he have to write one as well

demon rainbow: he needs to write one as well

sk8r boi: aight
sk8r boi: i'll tell him
sk8r boi: he said to give him a few minutes

demon rainbow: okie

sk8r boi: i'm a bit disappointed but he did it
sk8r boi: Jeno's Motivational Letter.doc

demon rainbow: i mean...
demon rainbow: fair enough
demon rainbow: i think we can all relate

sk8r boi: true
sk8r boi: we all love he

demon rainbow: who wouldn't
demon rainbow: when are you going to ask him out

sk8r boi: uhhh
sk8r boi: aaa that's a good question

demon rainbow: do it tomorrow

sk8r boi: okay
sk8r boi: i'll tell jeno then

demon rainbow: do you want me to write a recommendation letter

sk8r boi: pls do
sk8r boi: thank u boyfie xoxo

demon rainbow: Recommendation Letter.doc
demon rainbow: there u go

sk8r boi: thank u i love u baby

demon rainbow: i love you too

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[1:21 pm]

country boy: hey duckie
country boy: i'm not gonna be able to get to you today baby
country boy: kun and taeyong argued
country boy: and we have to get them to make up

rainbow demon: oh no, are they okay? :(
rainbow demon: tell me if i can help with anything!!!

country boy: thank you baby
country boy: they... will be. i talked to ten, they're with kun right now, they said that kun seemed very upset and that they also talked to taeyong about what happened and he blames himself entirely
country boy: but i don't know what happened yet
country boy: ten said they'd make a new group chat later so we'll see
country boy: i'm sure they'll be okay

rainbow demon: okay
rainbow demon: i love you

country boy: i love you too

 

[group chat 'bye-sexuals']
[2:00 pm]

[dancy pants has changed sk8r boi 's name to nana]

nana: lee donghyuck

rainbow demon: oh no my full name
rainbow demon: this can't be good

nana: after being vigorously tested by renjun, your boyfriend
nana: i have fallen under every criteria there is to be your boyfriend
nana: therefore i have the legal obligation to ask you out
nana: sry i don't make the rules

rainbow demon: i
rainbow demon: then ask, coward

nana: will you go out with me

rainbow demon: yeth
rainbow demon: h*ck yeah

nana: wait one more thing

[nana has changed dancy pants 's name to nono]

rainbow demon: is renjun gonna be njnj or ngng

nana: shh jeno's got something to say

nono: so i
nono: um
nono: fall under that criteria too

rainbow demon: pathetic

nono: i've got a recommendation letter!!
nono: Recommendation Letter.doc
nono: maybe that'll change your mind

nana: at this point even i don't want hyuck to change his mind
nana: i TAUGHT you how to do it
nana: we're on TEXT
nana: what kind of an UM can there be, jeno

nono: i'm NERVOUS
nono: shut up :(

rainbow demon: hm
rainbow demon: ur pardoned
rainbow demon: tho i haven't heard the question yet so i assume you just wanted to tell me ur breaking the law

nono: no
nono: do you want to go out with me?

rainbow demon: that's more like it
rainbow demon: i'd love to go out with you

[demon rainbow changed the group name to '00 boyfriends']

demon rainbow: there we go
demon rainbow: everyone's dating everyone, perfect

rainbow demon: uwuwuwuwuwuwuwu
rainbow demon: hi og boyfriend i love u

demon rainbow: hi og boyfriend i love you too
demon rainbow: hey later edition boyfriends i love y'all as well

nana: we love u too

nono: uwuwu love u

Chapter Text

[i'm the only ten you see added here's Johnald, country boy and 6 more to 'rescue mission']
[9:03 pm]

[here's Johnald changed i'm the only ten you see 's name to chittaphone]

here's Johnald: ur screen name makes the word count go up unnecessarily

chittaphone: what
chittaphone: what kind of a word count
chittaphone: anyway
chittaphone: this shit is worse than when m*rk and donghyuck were arguing

country boy: why are you censoring my name

chittaphone: you deserve to be censored
chittaphone: ANYWAY, before i get interrupted again
chittaphone: kun came to eat dinner and taeyong hadn't left yet and that was Majorly Uncomfortable
chittaphone: i was pretty sure taeyong was going to accidentally chop his finger off

loselose: he did accidentally cut himself after kun left

chittaphone: ,,, how many tomatoes does a person need

loselose: oh he finished with the tomatoes and started cutting bell peppers
loselose: and when those finished, he found some carrots that looked,,,,,, Not Fresh and cut those

chittaphone: oh my god
chittaphone: did he at least stop cutting vegetables afterwards

loselose: he ran to his room with his whole bleeding finger

chittaphone: you let him go ALONE??

loselose: no, taeil went after him dw
loselose: doyoung did too, i felt like a third would be too much for him

chittaphone: okay good
chittaphone: @moonmoon is he alright

moonmoon: physically it was only a scratch but he's crying a lot and apologizing to taeil for some reason??

chittaphone: /you're/ taeil,,

moonmoon: oh right this is taeil's phone
moonmoon: nah this is doyoung, taeil's busy hugging taeyong

chittaphone: uh-huh
chittaphone: so uh
chittaphone: do you need any help dealing with him or smth

moonmoon: no we'll be alright
moonmoon: i'll put the phone down tho
moonmoon: try to calm him down n stuff

chittaphone: aight
chittaphone: so
chittaphone: what are we going to do so they talk
chittaphone: bc taeyong knows he has to apologize
chittaphone: and i agree that he does, he said some unnecessary things
chittaphone: but he thinks that kun will be "better off without him" and all that dumb cliche shit

here's Johnald: this would make a shitty fanfic
here's Johnald: wip ***** words 57/? chapters slowburn enemies to lovers

chittaphone: oddly specific
chittaphone: send the link
chittaphone: but yeah what are we doing

here's Johnald: let's lock them up in a room together and not let them out until they talk

chittaphone: jesus you really do read cliche fanfics don't you
chittaphone: but,,,,,,, they won't talk willingly so i guess that's the only choice

here's Johnald: when tho

country boy: that's,,,, a bad idea
country boy: like, when hyuck and i were arguing, hyuck would've literally choked me to death if we were locked in a room together
country boy: or i would've choked myself tbh
country boy: give them some time
country boy: don't force the idea on them
country boy: i think a conversation that someone supervises would be better
country boy: and it'd be best if ten could do that?
country boy: bc they're the only one who can remain the most unbiased out of all of us
country boy: y'know, so neither of them yell at each other or idk, run away or smth

chittaphone: since when have you started making sense

country boy: since always, thanks for noticing

here's Johnald: that's a good idea
here's Johnald: i can talk to taeyong tomorrow

Milky Boy: i can talk to kun!!

chittaphone: then i guess notify us when they're ready to talk and i'll be there whenever

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[4:28 pm]

chittaphone: insufferable

Milky Boy: what

loselose: who

chittaphone: taeyong and kun
chittaphone: yes i know which chat i'm talking in
chittaphone: even the kids are uncomfortable and i think i'd be the last person to notice
chittaphone: i love you guys with my entire heart and i want you to make up but if it's going to be like this, try to avoid each other for a while
chittaphone: i get that you are arguing n shit but, idk, think of the dreamies
chittaphone: when youngho and i were arguing, we understood how bad it was to others so we avoided each other for the sake of not making others uncomfortable
chittaphone: i suggest you do the same

cool dad: dearly sorry, ten, for not being as smart as you are
cool dad: see, it's quite hard to avoid each other at meals when it's one of us cooking
cool dad: and when youngho and you were arguing, it was just as bad if not worse
cool dad: both of you walked around like zombies
cool dad: so it was very uncomfortable to be around you two

actual angel: i'm sorry i didn't mean to

chittaphone: sigh
chittaphone: you don't stay in the kitchen the whole time, especially after finishing cooking
chittaphone: mark and donghyuck had a whole news central set up so they don't run into each other at meals
chittaphone: it's not that hard to avoid each other

rainbow demon: uh
rainbow demon: guys, we don't need more breakups and conflicts than there already are

 

[group chat 'kun's boyfies']
[4:52 pm]

cool dad: let's take it here, not everyone has to see it

chittaphone: as i was saying
chittaphone: it's not that hard to at least not make the atmosphere so bad that people are literally afraid to talk around you guys
chittaphone: you are the most impactful couple here so if you two argue, the others will definitely feel it
chittaphone: the dreamies look up to you as 'parents' of the group

cool dad: we can't conceal our emotions like you
cool dad: and we /were/, looks like we aren't anymore

country boy: guys, hyuck's right, we really don't need more conflicts, it's already bad enough as it is

cool dad: mark, sweetheart, ten and i need to talk about it
cool dad: they need to voice their opinion and so do i

country boy: by the looks of it, you're arguing, though
country boy: there is no need for that

chittaphone: sometimes there is
chittaphone: sometimes people have to argue to get their point across properly, apparently
chittaphone: and it's not called concealing your emotions - cry, laugh, be angry, do whatever
chittaphone: but do it in a way that doesn't impact or harm anyone

loselose: ten, don't be a bitch about it

chittaphone: ah
chittaphone: hm okay
chittaphone: that's my cue to stop
chittaphone: toodles

cool dad: what
cool dad: we were talking

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[5:17 pm]

cool dad: what was that
cool dad: we were in the middle of a conversation

chittaphone: and now we're at the end of it
chittaphone: if sicheng says i'm being a bitch about it, i'm being a bitch about it and that's far from my intentions

cool dad: why is sicheng's opinion about you being bitchy to you more important than finishing a conversation like an adult

chittaphone: because sicheng and i tell each other if we're being unfair to anyone and to avoid making any relationships worse, we tell each other to stop early enough
chittaphone: i'm not ready to lose anyone
chittaphone: therefore, as i said, if sicheng says i'm being a bitch about it, i'm being a bitch about it and i don't want that
chittaphone: so i don't want to continue this conversation

cool dad: but i do

chittaphone: then that seems like a you problem
chittaphone: i'm not doing any arguments and neither are you

cool dad: i think we already did an argument, ten
cool dad: or at least are in the middle of one

chittaphone: then i don't want to continue it

cool dad: there needs to be a conclusion to this though

chittaphone: or what
chittaphone: i don't have anything more to say
chittaphone: if you do, then say whatever it is for you to say

cool dad: when you're willing to talk and stop being stubborn, we can talk
read: 5:37 pm

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[10:29 pm]

chittaphone: hey xuxi

:D: hi!!
:D: how are u feeling, i saw the gc :c

chittaphone: i'm uh alright
chittaphone: are you busy right now?

:D: not really, no
:D: did you want anything?

chittaphone: i've got no clue where i am
chittaphone: i went out to clear my head but i've got no clue where i am now
chittaphone: and i'm a tiny bit tipsy
chittaphone: so google maps aren't really helping when i can't even remember the address to our dorms
chittaphone: can u tell me the address so i can get home pls

:D: i'm going to come and get you
:D: tell me what you see around you

chittaphone: remember that restaurant i was telling you about a few days ago?
chittaphone: i'm somewhere here, i remember seeing it like two minutes ago

:D: yeah, okay, i'll be there, don't move

chittaphone: thank you

:D: no problem

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[11:42 pm]

:D: hey woo

junguwu: hii xuxi
junguwu: are you still going to come over?

:D: i was wondering if you minded if i stayed with ten tonight? they're really upset and drunk and i don't want them to do anything stupid

junguwu: oh of course!! i hope they feel better soon :((
junguwu: if you need any help, call me, okay?

:D: okay uwuwu ilysm

junguwu: ilym

:D: impossible

 

[private chat with :D]
[12:03 am]

chittaphone: you're in the shower now :((
chittaphone: i'm cold
chittaphone: come out quicker :c
chittaphone: i want your cuddles
chittaphone: i don't think i'll be able to shower by myself
chittaphone: i can barely stand lmao
chittaphone: i'll just shower in the morning i guess
chittaphone: mm i can smell the shower gel
chittaphone: i can imagine your skin smelling like apples and cinnamon
chittaphone: so perfect
chittaphone: i'm definitely going to buy you some more of it
chittaphone: god i'm sorry what am i even saying
chittaphone: ignore me
chittaphone: what the fuck

:D: ten
:D: where are you, love

chittaphone: i'll go to my room
chittaphone: i'll get there i'm sorry

:D: where are you, i'll come get you
:D: i don't want you to stay alone, you're drunk and might do something stupid

chittaphone: i'm
chittaphone: somewhere
chittaphone: god why are here so many corridors
chittaphone: there's a glass door in front of me, idk what it's for but it's locked

:D: anything written on it?

chittaphone: bold of you to assume i can read korean

:D: ten we're texting in korean
:D: try to focus a bit, love

chittaphone: something
chittaphone: something about sounds and producing, i don't know, i'm so confused

:D: i'll be right there, please don't go anywhere

chittaphone: bold of you to assume i can get up

:D: sigh
:D: i'll be right there

chittaphone: okay

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[10:28 am]

chittaphone: hi jungwoo

junguwu: hii

chittaphone: i'm actually here to apologize
chittaphone: i was really drunk yesterday and xuxi was there to help me
chittaphone: and i kissed him
chittaphone: xuxi wanted to tell you himself but i wanted to apologize for it to you as well
chittaphone: i know being drunk isn't an excuse
chittaphone: but i'm sorry

junguwu: ah, if xuxi's not upset about it, then it's okay
junguwu: thank you for telling me, ten
junguwu: are your boyfriends okay with it?

chittaphone: we've all talked about it before and we can kiss anyone in the group as long as it's, y'know, consensual n stuff (except the dreamies, of course)

junguwu: ah, okay
junguwu: are you feeling okay today?

chittaphone: yeah it's alright
chittaphone: gonna be just right

junguwu: okay
junguwu: but if you need anyone to talk to or someone to cuddle or anything, i'm available as well, okay?

chittaphone: thank you woo
chittaphone: love you

junguwu: i love you too
junguwu: so
junguwu: do you like xuxi?

chittaphone: feelings are hard
chittaphone: but i think so
chittaphone: i'm not sure though, it takes a lot from me to settle and understand n stuff

junguwu: that's understandable
junguwu: you should tell him when you're sure

chittaphone: i'll think about it
chittaphone: i'm a mess to deal with, i don't think that'd be the best thing

junguwu: aren't we all, though?
junguwu: xuxi doesn't seem like he minds dealing with messes, speaking from experience

chittaphone: mm he doesn't need me
chittaphone: ask my boyfriends, they'll tell you lmao

junguwu: ten sweetheart, you're amazing, don't say that
junguwu: your boyfriends love you

chittaphone: sounds fake but okay
chittaphone: ANYWAY
chittaphone: not gonna be depressing on main today ayy

junguwu: :c
junguwu: if you want to talk or cuddle, text me, okay?

chittaphone: okay
chittaphone: thank you, i will

 

[private chat with :D]
[10:52 am]

chittaphone: i told jungwoo he was okay with it
chittaphone: again, i'm sorry, i shouldn't have
chittaphone: i wasn't in my right mind
chittaphone: i don't want you to be uncomfortable

:D: it's okay ten don't worry about it
:D: it was okay before the eighth time you apologized too
:D: you were drunk
:D: we all do dumb things when we're drunk
:D: you didn't mean to
:D: it's not like you've got feelings for me

chittaphone: yeah exactly
chittaphone: i just like kissing lmao
chittaphone: and you seemed like a good candidate at the moment

:D: i'm honoured

chittaphone: as you should be
chittaphone: i now realize it wasn't such a good idea

Chapter Text

[group chat 'rescue mission']
[4:41 pm]

Milky Boy: hey y'all i talked to kun
Milky Boy: he said that he was up for talking to taeyong but only if they could do it today
Milky Boy: so uh
Milky Boy: tik tok tik tok

here's Johnald: taeyong asked if they could do it later but i'm guessing he'll agree to do it today as well
here's Johnald: @chittaphone are you up for the whole supervision thing
here's Johnald: since kun and you argued (?) yesterday

chittaphone: yeah lmao
chittaphone: it's chill
chittaphone: just tell me when and where

here's Johnald: kun's room? at around 6?

Milky Boy: 5:30
Milky Boy: kun's being a bit stubborn on those terms

here's Johnald: okay i'll get taeyong there

chittaphone: aight
chittaphone: then toodles pals, i gotta go do my makeup and change

here's Johnald: aren't you strictly against makeup in the dorms

chittaphone: i am
chittaphone: red eyes red nose and red cheeks don't go together well though

moonmoon: you just described a clown

chittaphone: i mean
chittaphone: i suppose i am one
chittaphone: but n e way i've got to go now

here's Johnald: ten sweetie you sure you're okay

chittaphone: have i ever been
chittaphone: but yeah don't worry i'm great

 

[private chat with ten's old phone]
[7:21 pm]

chittaphone: i should've fucking said no and that would've been all
chittaphone: but no of course i had to be the one to go and supervise them
chittaphone: i'm so not fucking okay
chittaphone: why was kun like that
chittaphone: what did i fucking do to him
chittaphone: i didn't want to argue yesterday
chittaphone: and today he already had a fucking stance against me, asking if now that sicheng's not looking at us to monitor my bitchiness, if we could finish the conversation we had yesterday
chittaphone: all arms over the chest and rude as ever
chittaphone: god i almost started crying again
chittaphone: how can one person be so influenced by an argument with another that they have the need to fuck up all other relationships they have too
chittaphone: after they made up, i think kun wanted to talk to me
chittaphone: but i couldn't bear the thought of it
chittaphone: i would've cried
chittaphone: i'm not letting anyone see me cry again
chittaphone: the thing with xuxi was a grave mistake that i can't even get into this time
chittaphone: but i'm guessing it's better if taeyong and kun are well together than me and him
chittaphone: i'll get over it sooner or later
chittaphone: taeyong wouldn't, he already started sobbing upon merely seeing kun
chittaphone: which is a big mood now and i hate it lmao
chittaphone: and i hate how i can't even tell all of this to an actual person
chittaphone: everyone has their own unofficial support person
chittaphone: and i've got fucking no one
chittaphone: sure johnny cares
chittaphone: but i care too so why the fuck should i bother him, i don't want him to leave me for being an inconvenience
chittaphone: i don't think kun cares anymore
chittaphone: and taeyong's too happy with kun right now for me to bother him
chittaphone: so none of my boyfriends are an option
chittaphone: and i don't want to sound like i'm slandering kun by talking to anyone else
chittaphone: which is fucking great lmao
chittaphone: love that for me haha!
chittaphone: i hate this
chittaphone: i hate everything so much
chittaphone: i hate that my dysphoria is going to go up as well because of my horrible mood
chittaphone: if it wasn't for this shitty ass company, i'd be gone already

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[7:51 pm]

cool dad: i owe everyone a formal apology
cool dad: i am very sorry for acting like i did these past days and i'm not going to say numerous excuses for it because that's all they'd be - excuses
cool dad: i shouldn't have let an argument with taeyong cloud my judgement
cool dad: yet i did and i'm truly sorry for acting like a dick

rainbow demon: aw it's okay
rainbow demon: are you and taeyong okay now though?

cool dad: better than ever
cool dad: we should've talked about it earlier

rainbow demon: oh thank god
rainbow demon: i already lost my belief in true love
rainbow demon: but there's still hope

actual angel: i bet your boyfriends would disagree with everything you've said
actual angel: boyfriends and datemate? partner? @demon rainbow which one do you prefer
actual angel: you are The Lee Donghyuck, u'll believe in love always and forever

demon rainbow: uh anything works? i haven't thought that far ksjshd
demon rainbow: partner sounds good uwu

rainbow demon: ...that's true but u didn't hear it from me
rainbow demon: we're partners in crime AND in love wow

demon rainbow: shh don't out our illegal activity just yet
demon rainbow: also ew don't be disgusting, that's nana's job

nana: HEY
nana: ...
nana: okay fair enough continue, i am indeed disgusting
nana: but i'm proud of it, bitch

cool dad: L A N G U A G E

nana: fuck
nana: I MEAN UH FRICK
nana: AND I DIDN'T CALL RENJUN THE B-WORD, I CALLED THEM UHH BEAUTIFUL
nana: YEAH THAT

cool dad: that's better
cool dad: also, has anyone seen ten?
cool dad: we have to talk a bit, i was in their room but they weren't there

chittaphone: that's because i'm not currently at the dorms
chittaphone: and i'm not in the mood for talking, thanks

cool dad: that's okay, i understand
cool dad: tell me when you are?

chittaphone: ye
chittaphone: anyway gotta go
chittaphone: cheerio, my good pals

 

[private chat with ten's old phone]
[8:19 pm]

chittaphone: i'm just so so tired
chittaphone: exhausted, that's the word
chittaphone: i promised johnny long ago already that i wouldn't drink again but i can't not
chittaphone: i'm upset
chittaphone: and i'm too fucking stubborn to admit it to anyone even if it's obvious that i'm not okay
chittaphone: but it's okay, i'll get myself together, no one will suspect a thing
chittaphone: that's what i always do
chittaphone: i just hope he doesn't figure that i'm back to my old habits
chittaphone: i guess it could be worse
chittaphone: i'll buy the bottle
chittaphone: can you even buy a bottle at a bar?
chittaphone: apparently if you pay enough, you can, that's nice
chittaphone: i'll go back to the dorms and continue getting drunk in my room, and maybe then i'll figure out what to do with my situation
chittaphone: with everything
chittaphone: i should block some people before i do, though
chittaphone: my drunk mind will think that someone cares about me lmao

Chapter Text

[group chat 'dreamies and a nightmare']
[8:30 pm]

tall baby: gays

rainbow demon: you called?

tall baby: y'all wanna hang out
tall baby: i'm bored
tall baby: and chenle's home :(

rainbow demon: wow using us as a rebound
rainbow demon: jeno said sure so come to my room uwu

demon rainbow: nana and i are joining
demon rainbow: @:D are u coming too

:D : i'd love to uwuwuwu
:D : mark's coming as well

rainbow demon: h*ck yeah
rainbow demon: he's gonna get this sm**ch
rainbow demon: also, bc my room isn't that big, i'm gonna sit in xuxi's lap uwu

:D : OwO

rainbow demon: you are the only person who can say owo and not get hit
rainbow demon: see how much i love u

:D : OWO
:D : i love you MORE

rainbow demon: that's fake news
rainbow demon: we do not accept alternative facts here

:D : >:( i'll fight u
:D : with my love

demon rainbow: are we supposed to be jealous or is it okay not to be

rainbow demon: SKSKSK
rainbow demon: don't be jealous, it's xuxi, i think we All love him

country boy: don't say that, he's going to start crying on me and i'm not equipped to deal with that

demon rainbow: it's true
demon rainbow: xuxi is the only boy, sry i don't make the rules

nana: yep sounds about right
nana: no one else but xuxi

:D : guys :(( i love u
:D : you are so tiny and adorable and lovable and it's so :((( cute

rainbow demon: mwah get here faster

 

[private chat with ten's old phone]
[9:02 pm]

chittaphone: LMAO
chittaphone: I JUST GOT BACK TO THE DORMS N ACTUALLY WENT INTO DONGHYUCK'S ROOM INSTEAD OF MINE SKSKSK
chittaphone: i'm talking to myself this is so sad
chittaphone: press f to pay respects
chittaphone: f
chittaphone: wow i hate myself
chittaphone: i'm lonely, i want someone by my side
chittaphone: i saw johnny was with jaehyun, i don't want to bother him
chittaphone: plus i'm like,,,, rly fucking drunk lmao he'd be mad at me for that
chittaphone: wouldn't want that haha
chittaphone: taeyong's with doyoung and kun's,,,, well, kun's kun so i can't ask him to come over either
chittaphone: which is
chittaphone: great
chittaphone: god the dreamies are SO LOUD
chittaphone: can they pls shut up
chittaphone: nvm the loud one's xuxi, he's allowed
chittaphone: i need to stop being so soft for xuxi
chittaphone: it's bad enough that i have let three people in my trust circle
chittaphone: none of them deserve to be in it either, they deserve so much better
chittaphone: not gonna do the same thing to xuxi
chittaphone: damn i'm old and sappy aren't i lmao
chittaphone: anyway i'm lonely haha
chittaphone: i hear xuxi next door
chittaphone: i'd rather have him next to me...
chittaphone: so warm... soft... comforting...
chittaphone: i hope i'm not as messed up in the future
chittaphone: maybe we can try something then
chittaphone: i really hope
chittaphone: maybe
chittaphone: fuck i'm crying this is fun

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[9:05 pm]

:D : hey jungwoo

junguwu: hi baby
junguwu: are you having fun with the dreamies uwu

:D : i am!!
:D : are you busy right now though?

junguwu: no not really
junguwu: is everything alright?

:D : ten accidentally came to hyuck's room (ythe left immediately)
:D : and they had a bottle of something that didn't look non-alcoholic with them
:D : and i'm worried
:D : so i was wondering if you could check up on them
:D : i don't want to seem like i'm, y'know, being too pushy if i go there
:D : and i haven't spent time with my friends in a while either...
:D : but if you can't go, i'll go!! i can meet up with everyone tomorrow or any other day

junguwu: don't worry your pretty little head, baby, i'll go
junguwu: have fun with your friends
junguwu: i love you

:D : thank you
:D : i love you more

junguwu: impossible

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[11:19 am]

rabbit(ch): calling all gays

chittaphone: present

rabbit(ch): no not you

chittaphone: ouch

loselose: present

rainbow demon: present

rabbit(ch): where is my lovely beautiful nice smart boyfriend
rabbit(ch): you know which one i'm talking about, there is only one that is lovely beautiful nice and smart

chittaphone: with me
chittaphone: he's still asleep so shh

rabbit(ch): squints
rabbit(ch): okay, don't corrupt him, he's too good for ur filthy mind

chittaphone: i'm very well aware thank you
chittaphone: he's sleeping so i doubt i can really do a lot to corrupt him
chittaphone: not like i would want to either
chittaphone: jungwoo's lovely

rabbit(ch): he is :((
rabbit(ch): i l*ve him

chittaphone: don't censor that
chittaphone: everyone loves jungwoo and the world needs to know that

rabbit(ch): fair enough
rabbit(ch): i love kim jungwoo uwu

cool dad: don't we all

:D : very good point
:D : he deserves all the love there is to get and more
:D : the loml
:D : (loml means love of my life, i know you know that but i had to say it again)

rabbit(ch): very valid

 

[private chat with ten's old phone]
[11:27 am]

chittaphone: i still don't understand how jungwoo knew when to come to my room
chittaphone: right when i was bawling my fucking eyes out
chittaphone: only shows that i can't show emotion
chittaphone: others don't have to deal with the mess that i am and i can't afford them accidentally having to stuble upon me like this
chittaphone: maybe xuxi textedjungwoo bc i accidentally went to donghyuck's room?
chittaphone: might be that, i doubt he'd want to come here on his own terms
chittaphone: in that case, thank god he didn't text johnny, i'm too scared to talk to him at this point
chittaphone: he tried so hard and took care of me when i was being an idiot before, not making him do the same again
chittaphone: god i'm such an idiot
chittaphone: bawled on jungwoo's shoulder yesteray like a weak bitch
chittaphone: because that definitely made him have a great impression of me
chittaphone: why do i even care
chittaphone: no one does he'll forget about this in a few anyway
chittaphone: he'll leave, meet doyoung and have all his cares taken away
chittaphone: and i can stop being a dumb crybaby bitch
chittaphone: no one will suspect a thing
chittaphone: everything's great

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[1:38 pm]

junguwu: hi xuxi

:D : hi loml
:D : how are u

junguwu: i'm good!! i was just with doyoungie
junguwu: can you come over?

:D : of course uwu anytime for u
:D : everything okay?

junguwu: yeah of course i just uh need to ask you a favour and i'd rather do it irl

:D : okay, then i'll be right there

 

[private chat with rabbit(ch)]
[2:39 pm]

:D : hey doyoung

rabbit(ch): hi what's up

:D : so jungwoo had something to tell you but he was too anxious to do it himself
:D : and i said i'd tell you

rabbit(ch): oh? what is it?

:D : jungwoo's asexual
:D : and people have had bad reactions, learning that
:D : so that's why he didn't want to tell you himself
:D : don't be mad at him for that

rabbit(ch): i'd never
rabbit(ch): that's completely okay with me
rabbit(ch): is he with you right now?

:D : yeah
:D : do you want me to give him my phone?

rabbit(ch): if you can, then yeah

:D : ofc
:D : hi doyoungie

rabbit(ch): hey sweetheart
rabbit(ch): i love you

:D : i love you too
:D : you're not mad?

rabbit(ch): of course not
rabbit(ch): i completely understand
rabbit(ch): and don't mind
rabbit(ch): there's so much more in a relationship than just sex

:D : okay
:D : thank you
:D : for understanding
:D : i love you

rabbit(ch): i love you too
rabbit(ch): can you tell me your limits?
rabbit(ch): i don't want to go too far or make you uncomfortable, baby

:D : ah it's okay!! it's just,, y'know, sex itself that i don't like but everything else is great
:D : i like the intimacy n stuff like that, just not when it comes to, excuse the vulgarity, sticking a dick somewhere or, well, having anything to do with That Kinda Thing
:D : e.g. xuxi and i shower together all the time and make out while being in the shower n stuff like that but we don't go anywhere further than that

rabbit(ch): ah okay, thank you for telling me, sweetheart
rabbit(ch): it must've taken a lot out of you to tell me

:D : wait i'll be right back, xuxi doesn't have a japanese keyboard which is a crime bc i can't get to the emoticons
:D : (*≧∀≦*)
:D : there we go ^ω^

rabbit(ch): that's adorable
rabbit(ch): i'll add a japanese keyboard for my phone as well, just in case

:D : you didn't have one before? 〴⋋_⋌〵
:D : that's a crime >:(

rabbit(ch): i'm sorry, now i have it though
rabbit(ch): (⌒∇⌒)
rabbit(ch): see?

:D : good
:D : you're forgiven

 

[private chat with ten's old phone]
[2:29 pm]

chittaphone: imagine drinking at 2 pm lmao
chittaphone: god i want to die

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[6:20 pm]

here's Johnald: i found your old phone

chittaphone: oh nice
chittaphone: where was it

here's Johnald: in one of my boxes, probably accidentally packed in when i was moving to a different room
here's Johnald: i charged it, thought we could go through some old photos

chittaphone: yeah sure
chittaphone: want me to come over now?

here's Johnald: yes, but not for the sake of pictures
here's Johnald: you were messaging your old phone

chittaphone: huh
chittaphone: well then
chittaphone: did you read the messages

here's Johnald: no, you've got your boundaries
here's Johnald: but i saw the last one because it was on the screen
here's Johnald: "god i want to die"
here's Johnald: ten, talk to me, please
here's Johnald: you're not alone in this

chittaphone: read them
chittaphone: read the messages
chittaphone: text me then

[6:54 pm]

here's Johnald: ten
here's Johnald: sweetheart
here's Johnald: why did you not come to me?
here's Johnald: or to anyone

chittaphone: if you read the messages, you'd know
chittaphone: i provided valid reasons for why i couldn't go to anyone

here's Johnald: you wouldn't have bothered anyone
here's Johnald: there's nothing more important than you and your mental health
here's Johnald: we love you
here's Johnald: we're here for you because we love you and we care
here's Johnald: i care
here's Johnald: kun cares
here's Johnald: taeyong cares
here's Johnald: and even if we're with someone at the moment, you can call/text at any time

chittaphone: and ruin your evening with my whining?
chittaphone: i'd rather not lmao

here's Johnald: ten, no
here's Johnald: trust me, if you feel upset constantly, that's what's going to ruin not only our evenings but also days and weeks

chittaphone: i pretended pretty well, though, didn't i?
chittaphone: no one but xuxi and jungwoo suspected a thing
chittaphone: minus the time i hinted that i had cried, that was a minor mistake

here's Johnald: that's nothing to be proud of
here's Johnald: i'd much rather have had you talk it out like a normal person

chittaphone: and where's the fun in that?
chittaphone: i'd rather not
chittaphone: i looked pretty happy at meals, right?
chittaphone: smiled so much i felt sick afterwards

here's Johnald: don't even start, ten
here's Johnald: i knew you weren't feeling well
here's Johnald: kun and taeyong did as well

chittaphone: oh that's nice
chittaphone: could've told me, i would've upped my acting game
chittaphone: y'know, on one hand i'm not surprised at all that you didn't talk to me about it
chittaphone: yet on the other, i'm strangely hurt

here's Johnald: we were giving you time
here's Johnald: we wanted you to come to us because we know how much you hate when someone gets their nose all up in your business

chittaphone: i remember last time you said that my mental health was /our/ business
chittaphone: stings a bit

here's Johnald: last time you also got very mad at me for bringing things up and said that you wouldn't let it get out of hand and that you would've talked to me about it sooner or later

chittaphone: and i apologized for it afterwards
chittaphone: and admitted that i was wrong
chittaphone: y'know, nevermind, it's alright
chittaphone: you can go through the photos on the phone
chittaphone: do whatever you want
chittaphone: i'm going to go out for a walk
chittaphone: i'll talk to you later, idk maybe i'm not in the right mindset
chittaphone: i'm sorry, i'll be back later

here's Johnald: i'll come with you

chittaphone: to see if i'm not drinking?
chittaphone: do you want me to bring you my phone and wallet and only then go?
chittaphone: because i'm legitimately going out for a walk
chittaphone: to the park or something, i don't know

here's Johnald: to make sure you're okay

chittaphone: i'm just peachy, youngho
chittaphone: i'm not going to do anything

here's Johnald: please stay safe
here's Johnald: i love you

chittaphone: i love you too baby

Chapter Text

[private chat with here's Johnald]
[7:32 pm]

chittaphone: johnny, sweetheart

here's Johnald: yeah?

chittaphone: can you please turn my old phone off?
chittaphone: i need to get something off my chest and i'd rather do it to myself
chittaphone: not in the mood for a conversation, y'know?
chittaphone: you can read it afterwards if you want to, baby, just... for now

here's Johnald: okay
here's Johnald: message me later so i know you're alright?

chittaphone: of course

 

[private chat with ten's old phone]
[7:41 pm]

chittaphone: do i even have anything to say
chittaphone: i'm just
chittaphone: empty at this point
chittaphone: that's better, i prefer that
chittaphone: i feel sad but i don't even know about what anymore
chittaphone: i've cried enough i think
chittaphone: time to stop being a weak bitch and start being apathetic to all the problems i face!
chittaphone: i'm such a bad example
chittaphone: and that's a wrap

 

[private chat with here's Johnald]
[7:56 pm]

chittaphone: you can turn it back on again if you wanted to go through, like, pictures or something
chittaphone: i finished
chittaphone: read if you want to, i don't rly care anymore

here's Johnald: i was hoping i could go through them with you?
here's Johnald: do you want to come over?
here's Johnald: also, uh, i didn't read but renjun and yuta have also been messaging your old phone, quite recently, too

chittaphone: huh
chittaphone: inch resting
chittaphone: and of course, i'd love to come over <3
chittaphone: tonight or...?

here's Johnald: tonight. i miss you

chittaphone: okay baby
chittaphone: i'll be there
chittaphone: i'm in the park right now so i'll be back in about twenty minutes or so? i need to take a few things from my room and then i can come to yours

here's Johnald: okay
here's Johnald: i love you!!

chittaphone: i love you too sweetheart
chittaphone: can we have one rule for the evening, though?

here's Johnald: sure, what is it?

chittaphone: let's not talk about me
chittaphone: as in... the whole rants and stuff
chittaphone: i don't think i'm ready for that and i'm not up for talking

here's Johnald: as you wish
here's Johnald: but know that i'm always here when you want to talk, okay?

chittaphone: i know, baby, i love you

here's Johnald: i love you too, angel

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[8:15 pm]

chittaphone: johnny found my old phone

demon rainbow: fuck
demon rainbow: hh pls don't read i thought it was long lost and gone i'm sorry

chittaphone: no don't worry about that i'm not planning to read anything, it's just that if the last message you sent is something you don't want me to read, then i'd suggest sending,,, idk, like a dot or smth so i can't read the last one
chittaphone: though johnny could read the last notification, just a warning

demon rainbow: it's nothing too much, it's just me figuring myself out, y'know
demon rainbow: i just don't want it to be read

chittaphone: ah alright
chittaphone: you can come over tomorrow and delete the messages if you wanna

demon rainbow: okay thank u uwu ily

chittaphone: love you too

Chapter Text

[private chat with winwin's stalker]
[8:19 pm]

chittaphone: so johnny found my old phone
chittaphone: and he noticed you've been messaging it
chittaphone: nothing's been read except the last notification since it just shows up
chittaphone: but, y'know,,, yeah

winwin's stalker: fuck

chittaphone: you and renjun had the same initial reaction, that's funny
chittaphone: do you, like, want to come over tomorrow n delete the messages n shit

winwin's stalker: uhh
winwin's stalker: actually
winwin's stalker: if you're willing to and if it's not too much of a bother... you can read and give me your input?
winwin's stalker: because you're, y'know, you - objective n shit
winwin's stalker: so yeah
winwin's stalker: but if you don't want to, that's fine too!! i'll come and delete the messages!!

chittaphone: ah aight i'll read them tomorrow
chittaphone: i'm with johnny right now so i can't rly read but i'll do it tomorrow

winwin's stalker: thank you ily
winwin's stalker: also can u pls change my screen name

chittaphone: it's accurate though

winwin's stalker: ,,,,
winwin's stalker: sure
winwin's stalker: nvm then

[chittaphone has changed winwin's stalker 's name to prince yuta]

chittaphone: better?

prince yuta: thank you uwu ily
prince yuta: both for the name change and the input

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[9:47 pm]

junguwu: hi hyuckie
junguwu: i assume you're not sleeping because you're a Rebel Youth™️

rainbow demon: owo to what do i owe the honour to be Worthy of a text from The Kim Jungwoo, the only man, whose boyfriend, coincidentally, is the only boy

junguwu: sksjdh Stop
junguwu: but speaking of the only boy
junguwu: i wanted to do something special for xuxi and i think you could help?

rainbow demon: i would love nothing more than being soft for xuxi because he's the only boy and i love him with my entire heart and it's what he deserves
rainbow demon: how may i be of service

junguwu: ಠ_ಠ lee donghyuck are u this soft for everyone or should i be jealous
junguwu: because i don't know how jealousy rly works n ur gonna have to teach me about it then

rainbow demon: it's xuxi!!! who doesn't love xuxi!!!
rainbow demon: also bold of you to assume i know how jealousy works
rainbow demon: i don't think it's a thing in healthy relationships anyway, you don't need it

junguwu: ah that's fair, true
junguwu: but yeah, basically, i know xuxi hasn't been spending as much time with you and mark and just everyone in general as much
junguwu: so i was thinking of doing like, a day/days of activities just for you guys? bc i know he misses you and i bet y'all miss him too

rainbow demon: i do :((
rainbow demon: we do :((
rainbow demon: but to be fair there just can never be too much xuxi, he's Xuxi, we love he

junguwu: me too :((

rainbow demon: and after the activity day things we can have dates!! you n doyoung n me n mark n jaemin n renjun n jeno!!
rainbow demon: that'd be!! so cute!!!

junguwu: yes
junguwu: your mind...
junguwu: could you think of places to go to? because, like, cinema n candy n toy shops are Automatically On The List but what else

rainbow demon: consider the list done uwu

Chapter Text

[private chat with prince yuta]
[4:21 am]

chittaphone: 4:20 blaze it
chittaphone: ah shit i missed it
chittaphone: anyway i hope ur phone's on silent bc i'm gonna spam you lmao
chittaphone: so uh i read the rants
chittaphone: and i'd say they're valid
chittaphone: like, don't get me wrong, sicheng loves you with his entire heart and doesn't mean it like that
chittaphone: "sometimes i think that he rejects me because he genuinely wants to break up with me"
chittaphone: that's not true, he doesn't want that
chittaphone: he loves you a lot
chittaphone: he's just not used to skinship, therefore he doesn't know how to deal with it n to not make it seem as,,, rude? he tries to play it off by jokes about how he rejects you and taeil because of this n because of that
chittaphone: and sometimes those jokes are,,, offensive to you
chittaphone: and i've told him that before
chittaphone: but he assured me that you know he loves you and that you're alright with it
chittaphone: "i feel like he's just with me because he doesn't know how to break up with me and is waiting for me to do it myself when i finally am done with him rejecting me in front of everyone yet i still persist because i don't want to lose him n that,,, sucks, for the both of us"
chittaphone: please talk to him about it
chittaphone: sicheng just,, has a peculiar sense of humour and a distaste for akinship at certain moments but he likes that you persist and he's been warming up to it recently
chittaphone: but sicheng's sensible n he doesn't want you to feel bad so if you tell him that you don't like that
chittaphone: he'll stop
chittaphone: i know him
chittaphone: you shouldn't be worried about it, sicheng's just,,,,, what do y'all call those anime characters that are not nice n all at first n then warm up???
chittaphone: tsun- tsunami??? no that's not it
chittaphone: uhh
chittaphone: fuck, you get what i mean, i know you do
chittaphone: just
chittaphone: talk to him
chittaphone: he'll stop
chittaphone: or i can talk to him if you want me to, idm

[8:43 am]

prince yuta: wtf were you doing up at 4 am
prince yuta: but thank you
prince yuta: i'll
prince yuta: talk to him
prince yuta: maybe
prince yuta: we'll see

chittaphone: couldn't sleep

prince yuta: whY ARE YOU STILL AWAKE
prince yuta: go sleep wtf

chittaphone: c a n ' t s l e e p
chittaphone: but also, if you don't talk to sicheng, i'm going to decapitate you so uh yeah, choose which you prefer

prince yuta: Mmmm Death!
prince yuta: sounds good

chittaphone: yuta
chittaphone: talk to sicheng
chittaphone: or let me talk to him
chittaphone: y'all have a good relationship and i'm not letting it die

prince yuta: hh okay

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[9:32 am]

rabbit(ch): where is my boyfriend

:D : which one
:D : you have like...
:D : Multiple

rabbit(ch): i have three boyfriends
rabbit(ch): unless i started dating someone else and it wasn't just a fever dream of mine
rabbit(ch): but only two of my boyfriends are valid
rabbit(ch): and i'm with one of them aka kun at the moment
rabbit(ch): therefore, where is jungwoo uwu

actual angel: bitch
actual angel: @cool dad tell doyoung to not bully me

cool dad: done

actual angel: thank u
actual angel: i love u

cool dad: i love u more

chittaphone: disgusting
chittaphone: there are children here

tall baby: who are the children

chittaphone: me
chittaphone: i'm the child
chittaphone: but anyway, jungwoo's eating
chittaphone: breakfast time
chittaphone: let him eat, he needs it
chittaphone: don't bother him

rabbit(ch): (>_>)
rabbit(ch): i don't trust you

chittaphone: jungwoo is the only person allowed to use the japanese keyboard for emoticon purposes
chittaphone: n what do you think i'm gonna do
chittaphone: corrupt him at the breakfast table?
chittaphone: i'm rly not that bad if you use your brain, buddy

rabbit(ch): that's exactly something you'd do
rabbit(ch): you can't say you wouldn't bc i'm right

chittaphone: ffs
chittaphone: sure you are, soon you're going to get a restraining order for me to not be allowed to be withing thirty feet of jungwoo, aren't you

rabbit(ch): sigh, if only i could

nono: uh ten literally just left the breakfast table n they barely ate anything
nono: i think u got on their nerves a bit

rabbit(ch): i
rabbit(ch): uh @chittaphone you,, shouldn't have

chittaphone: oh for fuck's sake what do you want from me
chittaphone: everything's fun and games but honestly just stop, that's enough
chittaphone: literally everyone's noticed that i feel like shit for the past days and i was glad you were the only one who wasn't all up in the pity n sorry mode but god damn it gets annoying sometimes
chittaphone: genuinely feels like you don't want me to be around jungwoo and i don't appreciate that
chittaphone: if ur not joking and really don't want me to be around him, then tell me, otherwise just stop
chittaphone: i get everything n it's fun joking around and shit but don't make me feel like it's wrong being around someone that calms me because that really does nothing to help my mental state

rabbit(ch): i'm sorry
rabbit(ch): i didn't mean it like that
rabbit(ch): i won't say that again

chittaphone: shit i'm sorry
chittaphone: don't worry you did nothing wrong
chittaphone: i shouldn't have snapped like that fuck
chittaphone: you were just being like you normally are n thank you for that
chittaphone: fuck
chittaphone: i'm so sorry doyoung, i shouldn't have
chittaphone: i was just fed up with everything and snapped and i shouldn't have
chittaphone: you really did nothing wrong
chittaphone: i just
chittaphone: fuck
chittaphone: i'm sorry
chittaphone: it's not your fault

cool dad: ten do you want someone to come over, sweetheart?

chittaphone: please

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[2:52 pm]

chittaphone: hi guys

actual angel: are you alright?

chittaphone: right now? yeah, i'm squished up in between kun and doyoung who have fallen asleep n i just woke up
chittaphone: but no, not in general
chittaphone: and i think it's time for me to admit it out loud
chittaphone: or, well, y'know, here, with everyone
chittaphone: taeyong stop typing i'm having an Old Sap moment
chittaphone: anyway
chittaphone: listen up kiddos, this one's for u so you don't make the same mistakes as old cap'n ten here
chittaphone: what i did was wrong and i shouldn't have bottled my emotions up until the point i snapped at someone
chittaphone: and the way i dealt with my emotions up until now was wrong
chittaphone: and i know better now and i'm deciding in favour of the logical side of my brain that knows that i do have people that care about me here
chittaphone: even if the emotional side of me says something completely different
chittaphone: and i guess i'd have to go to a therapist by now to get Actual Professional Help but we're in korea n they'd say that i've gone insane bc what the fuck is Agender™️ n just,,, i don't really trust people n that includes therapists
chittaphone: but i trust you guys
chittaphone: and you've shown me that you care far too many times for me to try to make up excuses to convince myself you don't
chittaphone: and from now on when i feel bad i'm going to talk to you instead of keeping everything in and pretending i'm fine
chittaphone: and, i guess, i'm admitting it both to you and to myself that i'm not okay but this is finally the time i'm letting myself get help for it
chittaphone: i love you all, even though i don't say it much

loselose: wow you really are an Old Sap
loselose: (i love you too)

actual angel: we all love you, too, sweetheart
actual angel: i'm so glad and proud you've come to this

chittaphone: :(( mw*h

demon rainbow: my boyfriend and i are taking you out, ten
demon rainbow: tomorrow n u have no choice uwu

chittaphone: wait
chittaphone: which boyfriend
chittaphone: 'cause if it's m*rk i'm not coming

demon rainbow: i'm not even dating mark
demon rainbow: and i meant donghyuck

chittaphone: you mean not dating... /yet/
chittaphone: it'll happen sooner or later n you know it

demon rainbow: excuse me
demon rainbow: i have no comments on this matter

country boy: and neither do i
country boy: also, 1) i love you ten and i truly hope you get better soon, 2) that's rude and how dare you say that, i'm lovely

chittaphone: did i really make everyone go into sap mode
chittaphone: what have i done
chittaphone: but also no the only lovely people here are kun, jungwoo, taeyong, johnny, and doyoung (he's lovely only up until a certain point though)

rainbow demon: can't believe you forgot to add me
rainbow demon: such slander
rainbow demon: but you are forgiven because i
rainbow demon: squints
rainbow demon: don't mind you

chittaphone: don't squint, you'll fr*ck up your eyes, tiny child
chittaphone: and i can't say i mind you either

rainbow demon: that's lovely uwu ily

chittaphone: ilyt ig

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[3:17 pm]

chittaphone: hi jungwoo

junguwu: henlo
junguwu: i love u

chittaphone: i love u too
chittaphone: don't feel pressured to say yes just because of,,,, Everything but do you and doyoung, and xuxi want to go out sometime? all of us together?

junguwu: i'd be more than happy to!!
junguwu: and i'm sure doyoung and xuxi would be too!!
junguwu: when and where do u wanna go?

chittaphone: uh, i'm guessing renjun&donghyuck are taking me out tomorrow? so maybe the day after that?
chittaphone: or any day all of you are free, i don't mind any day

junguwu: the day after tomorrow it is uwu

chittaphone: god thank fuck we're texting in korean lmao, if we texted in english 'the day after tomorrow' would literally be four words
chittaphone: and it's one in korean and in a bunch of other languages because other languages know that it's a needed word, unlike english which is useless

junguwu: oh no are you going on a language rant

chittaphone: ksjsjs no don't worry i'm not in the mood to explain just how much english doesn't make sense, not today

junguwu: oh thank god, xuxi always tells me about chinese and korean and english and sometimes he forgets that i,,, Do Not Speak Most Languages He Does and starts speaking to me in english and i'm so
junguwu: confused

chittaphone: did you mean: kun @ taeyong
chittaphone: i've had taeyong come to me and johnny in the middle of the night because kun started talking to him in chinese and taeyong didn't understand any of it

junguwu: oh yeah, now that you mention kun
junguwu: are you guys okay? did you talk?

chittaphone: ah well
chittaphone: i wouldn't really call it a talk
chittaphone: i wasn't really in the mood to say anything that didn't include the words "i'm sorry" in it to both doyoung and kun
chittaphone: but they both assured me everything was alright and then i somehow fell asleep
chittaphone: and so did they
chittaphone: but, y'know, kun came so i'm guessing everything really is alright
chittaphone: i'll ask him when he wakes up
chittaphone: he looks too cute like this for me to even move
chittaphone: WHAT THE FUCK DOYOUNG JUST KISSED MY CHEEK BUT HE'S STILL ASLEEP DISGUSTING

junguwu: ah, he does that
junguwu: he's really cuddly n soft n squishy when he's asleep
junguwu: well, always, but especially when he's asleep
junguwu: he likes when someone plays with his hair so do that and he might hug you tighter

chittaphone: that's disgusting
chittaphone: i'll try that
chittaphone: google how to deal with two c*te boys lying next to you n hugging you

junguwu: i remember when i cuddled with both xuxi and doyoungie :((
junguwu: i felt like i was going to Ascend
junguwu: they're so soft and cute and lovely and i'm in love with both of them
junguwu: my boyfriends are the only boys ever
junguwu: + kun
junguwu: kun is also allowed, he's lovely

chittaphone: n soon to be your boyfriend as well anyway
chittaphone: call me vanga because i'm predicting this

junguwu: you better be right

chittaphone: that's not the answer i expected but fuck yeah
chittaphone: y'all would be like,, the powercouple

junguwu: i trust you, i'm not gonna hide my True Answer from you kdjshs

chittaphone: u-uwu i trust u too
chittaphone: ah wait kun's waking up, i'm gonna try to quietly talk to him

junguwu: okay!! good luck bub, love you

chittaphone: love you too

Chapter Text

[private chat with ten's old phone]
[5:21 pm]

chittaphone: i guess i won't be using this anymore
chittaphone: it felt wrong to leave it all on a bad note
chittaphone: but yeah
chittaphone: making some changes in my life
chittaphone: and if they work, these are gonna be the last messages here
chittaphone: if they don't... then see you later, i guess

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[5:23 pm]

chittaphone: hello child

demon rainbow: owo this is Unexpected
demon rainbow: for what do i deserve this Honour

chittaphone: your existence is enough <3
chittaphone: ew i sound like jaemin now

demon rainbow: don't slander my boyfriend
demon rainbow: he's sappy but that's just an endearing quality of his

chittaphone: i recall the times you called him disgusting
chittaphone: how things change...
chittaphone: ur jaemin is like johnny, he's sappy but i l*ve him
chittaphone: sometimes

demon rainbow: i'm following in your footsteps
demon rainbow: oh no am i really going to be this short my entire life then

chittaphone: don't
chittaphone: a midlife crisis at the age of twenty-something is not a thing to strive for
chittaphone: ur following in uhhhhhhhhh *insert another gq person who isn't me* footsteps
chittaphone: there we go, nailed it
chittaphone: and if you mention even one (1) more thing about my height while being just as tiny as me, i'm going to break your limbs and make you even shorter xoxo

demon rainbow: that's ur quarter life crisis, not midlife smh
demon rainbow: and do it, i dare you, coward

chittaphone: nevermind i'm scared of donghyuck, he's terrifying
chittaphone: not scarier than me, i suppose, but for a child, he's scary

demon rainbow: we aren't children >:(

chittaphone: i'm older than you, therefore by the laws of this land, you are a child
chittaphone: and you shall be treated and addressed as such
chittaphone: kiddo

demon rainbow: well at least i'm not OLD like you
demon rainbow: fuckin grandma >:(

chittaphone: Wow Such Slander How Will I Survive
chittaphone: i'd rather be a grandma than a child who has no rights

demon rainbow: this is homophobia
demon rainbow: i'm protesting

chittaphone: welcome to the real world, kid
chittaphone: you either kill or get killed
chittaphone: what you gonna do

demon rainbow: die, obviously

chittaphone: shit, yeah, mood
chittaphone: *gosh darn

demon rainbow: never say g*sh d*rn ever again
demon rainbow: it's cursed and i hate it
demon rainbow: and i can and will block you

chittaphone: wow don't be rude to your elders
chittaphone: also uh are you and donghyuck actually taking me out tomorrow or

demon rainbow: yeah ofc
demon rainbow: be ready at around 11 am, we've got the day thought out
demon rainbow: if you don't mind, xuxi might join?

chittaphone: ah aight
chittaphone: and who would ever mind xuxi
chittaphone: it's xuxi

demon rainbow: oh that's fair, yeah
demon rainbow: xuxi's lovely <3
demon rainbow: i'm the president of xuxi fanclub
demon rainbow: donghyuck's the vice president

chittaphone: can i be the advisor

demon rainbow: perfect
demon rainbow: gotta get jobs for jaemin n jeno m mark

chittaphone: jaemin's the minister of affection, jeno makes sure no one goes insane and mark is there to translate the bro-speak

demon rainbow: wow what would i do without you
demon rainbow: that's perfect
demon rainbow: thank

chittaphone: welc

Chapter Text

[private chat with prince yuta]
[9:41 pm]

chittaphone: did you talk to sicheng

prince yuta: uhhhh
prince yuta: who's that
prince yuta: haha i think u've got the wrong number pal

chittaphone: i assume you didn't
chittaphone: why

prince yuta: bc it's just me being dumb
prince yuta: sicheng shouldn't be concerned bc i'm being Dumb
prince yuta: i should just respect the fact he doesn't like skinship as much as i do and stop

chittaphone: if i wasn't currently still being hugged by kun and doyoung, i would literally strangle you

prince yuta: can you even reach me

chittaphone: you've stooped low enough for me to be able to step on you
chittaphone: talk to sicheng
chittaphone: for a relationship to work, y'all have to communicate
chittaphone: or i can and will Make you talk to each other

prince yuta: hhhh okay

 

[private chat with loselose]
[9:49 pm]

prince yuta: hey sichengie

loselose: oh no
loselose: you only call me that when you're about to say something bad

prince yuta: sksjs do i
prince yuta: it's nothing bad don't worry
prince yuta: but i am scared that ten might strangle me so i have to talk to you about it

loselose: hh okay
loselose: do you want to do it irl or over text

prince yuta: over text?
prince yuta: it's easier to formulate thoughts that way

loselose: mm alright
loselose: what is it?

prince yuta: y'know i didn't rly think through how i was gonna start
prince yuta: Fuck^TM

loselose: if you don't say it now, it's going to be me that strangles you
loselose: and NOT in the kinky way

prince yuta: oh no
prince yuta: uhhhhhhhh so basically
prince yuta: i was kinda *insert emotion name* about how you always reject skinship?
prince yuta: like, i understand you don't like it and that's completely fine i understand and i'm not gonna try to coerce you into it
prince yuta: but it's just kinda,,, confusing? when you constantly reject me but then say that you like that taeil and i do it
prince yuta: idk what taeil feels about it but yeah
prince yuta: i guess i just wanna know what you're more comfortable with so i don't overstep any boundaries and don't have to get rejected every time

loselose: oh
loselose: i'm sorry, i didn't know you felt like that
loselose: i don't dislike skinship, i'm just not used to it, y'know?
loselose: i'm getting more used to it as time goes on bc of you and taeil, and kun
loselose: but sometimes it gets a bit much?
loselose: i don't know, sometimes it feels just right but sometimes it's too much n yeah
loselose: i try to play it off more like a joke than a 'rejection' but i guess that hasn't worked too well

prince yuta: the jokes were mostly what concerned me to be honest
prince yuta: 'cause i didn't really know what to make of them
prince yuta: so i was kinda confused
prince yuta: and if we're being honest (which we are or ten is going to murder me in cold blood and that's not my deepest desire, at one point i thought you wanted to break up but didn't know how

loselose: oh no
loselose: yuta, i love you
loselose: and i would never ever want that
loselose: i'm sorry

prince yuta: i love you too
prince yuta: can you tell me what you're more comfortable with, so i know? or do you want me to ask you before i try to hug/kiss/cuddle/whatever you?

loselose: just ask beforehand
loselose: can you come over?

prince yuta: on my way
prince yuta: mwah

loselose: uwu

Chapter Text

[group chat 'bye-sexuals']
[3:29 am]

rainbow demon: are any of y'all awake
rainbow demon: i'm bored

demon rainbow: no, go to sleep

rainbow demon: renjun!! the loml!! you're here!!
rainbow demon: how's your night going!!

demon rainbow: sleeplessly
demon rainbow: jeno's phone went off bc you texted so now i'm awake
demon rainbow: how are nana and jeno still fucking asleep wtf
demon rainbow: if jeno doesn't turn his phone the fuck off next time, i'm going to strangle him

rainbow demon: wow y'all are together without me :((

demon rainbow: ,,, you're literally with mark right now
demon rainbow: why the fuck are y'all awake

rainbow demon: oh taeyong came in the room and started waking mark up for some reason and he didn't know i was there lmao
rainbow demon: so now we're both awake
rainbow demon: mark went to get us some water
rainbow demon: therefore i am: bored

demon rainbow: please text everything in one message 'cause i might have to throw jeno's phone out of the window and i don't want to do that too much

rainbow demon: and
rainbow demon: what
rainbow demon: if
rainbow demon: i
rainbow demon: don't

demon rainbow: literally the only things you're doing right now is annoying me and making the word count go up, so stop

rainbow demon: oh true yeah lmao oops
rainbow demon: oops about the word count part not the annoying you part, annoying you is Gud

demon rainbow: if it were not for the laws of this land, i would've strangled you

rainbow demon: i think you're threatening me too much
rainbow demon: that's not good, stop that

nana: shut the fuck up i'm trying to sleep it's like 4 am

rainbow demon: it's not 4 am yet uwu
rainbow demon: and you love me uwu

nana: i'm seriously reconsidering that right now
nana: god damn it, how does jeno sleep through that noise what the fuck

demon rainbow: I HAVE THE SAME QUESTION
demon rainbow: i vote we suffocate him with a pillow and drown his phone

nana: renjun no

rainbow demon: renjun no

demon rainbow: dang y'all are no fun huh
demon rainbow: okay i guess

rainbow demon: mark came back uwuwuwu
rainbow demon: him pretty :((

demon rainbow: him gonna be dead if he doesn't make you go back to sleep again so we can not listen to jeno's dumb fucking phone that doesn't know how to shut up

rainbow demon: why do you... not... wake jeno... up... and make him... turn off... the volume...
rainbow demon: or better yet
rainbow demon: turn it off yourself

demon rainbow: we can't
demon rainbow: jeno's uncultured so even when the volume's off, the vibration is still on
demon rainbow: but yeah we could wake jeno up

nana: but he looks so cute :((

demon rainbow: that's unfortunately true
demon rainbow: sigh
demon rainbow: i guess we're suffering

nana: crawl over jeno and be in the middle, jun, i wanna hug u uwu

demon rainbow: that's disgusting why would i want that

rainbow demon: i'd let nana hug me if he wanted to :((
rainbow demon: but he doesn't :((((

demon rainbow: so uh
demon rainbow: i'm not entirely sure but
demon rainbow: jaemin just left the room
demon rainbow: and i think he's on his way to you and mark
demon rainbow: so,,, just a warning
demon rainbow: be careful what you wish for
demon rainbow: o, jeno woke up
demon rainbow: no he didn't, he just started cuddling me tighter

rainbow demon: i hear footsteps is that jaemin
rainbow demon: yep that's jaemin
rainbow demon: hello mark here what the fuck is nana doing here at 4 am

demon rainbow: don't question nana, when has he ever made sense

rainbow demon: that's fair
rainbow demon: i guess he's staying with us because he's cuddling hyuck right now and kissing him A Lot Of Times
rainbow demon: should i really be here

demon rainbow: come over to me and jeno, mark
demon rainbow: we aren't as disgusting as nana and hyuck uwu

rainbow demon: y'know
rainbow demon: imma do exactly that
rainbow demon: be right there

Chapter Text

[group chat 'bye-sexuals']
[9:54 am]

rainbow demon: Bitch

nono: i agree
nono: but who exactly?

rainbow demon: renjun
rainbow demon: or mark
rainbow demon: i haven't decided yet

nono: both maybe?
nono: both seems quite right to me
nono: mark stole my boyfriend at night >:(
nono: shit, *my partner, sorry jun
nono: and renjun let themselves be stolen >:(

rainbow demon: yep both work pretty well
rainbow demon: @demon rainbow tell mark he's a bitch
rainbow demon: also ur a bitch too while we're at it

demon rainbow: that's fair
demon rainbow: mark's a good cuddler though so it was worth it
demon rainbow: you missed quite the opportunity

rainbow demon: yeah but mark loves me so he'll cuddle me later uwu
rainbow demon: or even better
rainbow demon: maybe both nana and mark can cuddle me at the same time hehe

demon rainbow: mark said, and i quote: "Tough luck."
demon rainbow: i wrote it like that because he's a het so he talks with capitals n punctuation n shit

nana: mark's lovely
nana: i do not approve of the way you elbowed me in the ribs for that statement, hyuck
nana: mark is lovely and that's a fact

demon rainbow: no one says that
demon rainbow: unless they've got...

rainbow demon: A CRUSH ON MARK LEE

demon rainbow: ugh our minds
demon rainbow: i love how you understand me, hyuck

nana: oh yeah lmao
nana: so like i said, mark is lovely
nana: and i sure hope he isn't reading this rn

demon rainbow: he's still asleep
demon rainbow: adorable :((

nana: so if only people that have a crush on mark talk like that
nana: u've got something to tell us?

nono: OOOOH RENJUN'S GOT A CRU-USH
nono: hehe that's adorable
nono: also JAEMIN'S GOT A CRU-USH

nana: wait i'll tell y'all my story of how i fell for him but i wanna hear from renjun
nana: renjun
nana: ren
nana: jun
nana: how did u fall for mark

demon rainbow: oh ffs
demon rainbow: sigh
demon rainbow: yes i like mark lee what's the big deal

nono: oh no

nana: oh no what

nono: mark woke up and bc he was cuddling renjun, first thing he did was looking over their shoulder n he saw the "yes i like mark lee" message
nono: so renjun fucked off so hard that they fell out of bed
nono: and now they're on the run and i assume on their way to you guys
nono: and mark's just,,, rly confused right now
nono: so yeah

rainbow demon: ah my poor bby

nono: which one

rainbow demon: i haven't decided yet
rainbow demon: both i guess

nana: hey let's make this interesting

[nana added country boy]

country boy: uh
country boy: hello what is this

Chapter Text

[group chat 'bye-sexuals']
[10:29 am]

demon rainbow: oh my god nana i'm going to murder you what the fuck

country boy: ah
country boy: this is the chat i accidentally saw
country boy: huh

nana: oh my god if you saw jun's face right now
nana: they're so red oh my god

demon rainbow: NO I'M NOT
demon rainbow: I'M UHHH WHITE

country boy: ur korean
country boy: and trust me you don't wanna be white, have some culture
country boy: but that's a different story

demon rainbow: nana this is your fault
demon rainbow: i'm going to strangle you

rainbow demon: we're having some technical difficulties over here
rainbow demon: once i stop renjun from murdering nana, we'll be back
rainbow demon: meanwhile you guys can uhh cuddle or smth

nono: on it uwu

country boy: oh no
country boy: is this my life now

nana: yep
nana: also hello i'm back
nana: almost dead
nana: but anyway, what exactly did you see

country boy: uh
country boy: i can't recall the exact wording of the message but it was basically something along the lines of "i like mark lee" so uh
country boy: yeah
country boy: is that like a quote from hyuck

rainbow demon: oh my god
rainbow demon: are you... serious

country boy: should i not be

demon rainbow: oh my god seconded
demon rainbow: you really are dense
demon rainbow: i've got three boyfriends and they are all morons
demon rainbow: and now another moron
demon rainbow: i really am morosexual huh

country boy: wait
country boy: you rly like me?

nono: THANK THE HEAVENS
nono: his 0.02 brain cells woke up

demon rainbow: sigh
demon rainbow: unfortunately

country boy: oh
country boy: well uh
country boy: i like you too

rainbow demon: this is so cute :')

nana: shh they're having a moment

rainbow demon: and i want to be a part of it
rainbow demon: i'm ur cutest boyfriend, let me live uwu

demon rainbow: unexpected
demon rainbow: much to think about

nono: so are y'all dating now or not
nono: i can't handle this suspense

country boy: well, renjun?
country boy: are we?

demon rainbow: fuck yeah we are
demon rainbow: donghyuck just screamed my ears hurt

country boy: jeno just hugged me so tightly as if i had started dating him, i'm hurting too
country boy: we're in this together

demon rainbow: wanna get away?
demon rainbow: get some breakfast n stuff

country boy: if jeno lets me go before my blood circulation cuts off, gladly

demon rainbow: i'll help you wrestle out of there
demon rainbow: i'm coming to the room anyway 'cause i gotta get dressed

country boy: thank u, ur my saviour
country boy: please get to me before i have died

demon rainbow: i'm running already
demon rainbow: which is technically breaking ur boyfriend's rules of Not Running In The Dorms

country boy: yeah but unless it's absolutely necessary
country boy: and i think my alive-ness is pretty vital

demon rainbow: well that's debatable but fair enough
demon rainbow: almost there uwu

Chapter Text

[group chat 'mark's boyfies']
[11:10 am]

[country boy added demon rainbow]

[rainbow demon changed group name to 'mark's boyfies n pardner']

cool dad: ooh
cool dad: nice
cool dad: welcome to the club uwu

demon rainbow: henlo

actual angel: aw this is cute
actual angel: how did y'all start dating
actual angel: i thought i'd have to suffer for months through the mutual pining until one of y'all's brain cells start working

rainbow demon: oh trust me their brain cells did not play any role in this

actual angel: sigh
actual angel: then i don't want to know, tell me at dinner table instead
actual angel: i'm going back to kissing ten

rainbow demon: THAT REMINDS ME
rainbow demon: MARK AND RENJUN YOU HAVEN'T KITHED YET
rainbow demon: ADORABLE

cool dad: keep it above the neck

rainbow demon: wow they can't even hold hands?
rainbow demon: that's cruel
rainbow demon: renjun headbutt him

cool dad: do NOT headbutt mark
cool dad: mark why exactly do you fall for disasters

country boy: i mean... that says something about you, too, doesn't it?

cool dad: ...fair enough
cool dad: keep it below the wrists and above the waistline, does that sound good

demon rainbow: what exactly about the both of us makes you think that before even noon at the breakfast table we would even have the slightest idea of keeping it below the waistline
demon rainbow: also wow pls i wanna touch mark's bicep >:(

cool dad: teens and their hormones

demon rainbow: you talk like ur a grandpa
demon rainbow: ur only 4 years older than me

cool dad: i've been your age, you've never been mine

demon rainbow: 吃屎

cool dad: LANGUAGE
cool dad: mark i do not approve of ur new partner

country boy: what did they say

cool dad: i cannot repeat such words back to you
cool dad: i'm not that rude
cool dad: i need to take my heart medication
cool dad: kids these days

country boy: renjun what did u say

demon rainbow: basically 'eat shit'

country boy: KSJSJS
country boy: amazing

cool dad: wow you won't even defend me
cool dad: i see how it is
cool dad: mark ur a 坏蛋

country boy: a what

rainbow demon: i'm not too sure but i think the second character thingie means egg
rainbow demon: so ur some kind of an egg
rainbow demon: which is not the worst thing to be in chinese swearwords

demon rainbow: kun is that rly all you've got
demon rainbow: softie

cool dad: i love my boyfriend >:(
cool dad: i'm not gonna be mean

country boy: aww uwu i lov u too

cool dad: i didn't say that you were the boyfriend i love but aight

country boy: RUDE
country boy: but pls let's speak korean
country boy: or english if y'all prefer that, multilinguals >:(

rainbow demon: aw markie's upset
rainbow demon: renjun don't u think that a kiss could make it all better hehe

demon rainbow: hyuck have i ever told you you're insufferable

rainbow demon: yes
rainbow demon: multiple times

demon rainbow: good, you deserve to know

rainbow demon: oh i know, trust me i know
rainbow demon: so does anyone in a five mile radius

demon rainbow: we don't even use miles here
demon rainbow: how much is a mile

rainbow demon: no idea
rainbow demon: it just sounded better

demon rainbow: that's fair

country boy: one mile is 1.6 kilometres

demon rainbow: wow my boyfriend's so smart
demon rainbow: and by my boyfriend i mean mark and no one else

rainbow demon: whipped
rainbow demon: where did kun go

cool dad: i'm lurking
cool dad: can't type, i'm walking over to ten's place, they said they can't choose what to wear

rainbow demon: yeah they said
rainbow demon: i think we're gonna end up leaving at 12 instead of 11 at this point sksjdh

demon rainbow: oh well
demon rainbow: i'm ready so we can leave whenever they get dressed, idm

rainbow demon: kun pls help them choose what to wear faster or i will come to their room and cancel our today's plans to evaluate their closet n have a fashion day today

cool dad: i'll see what i can do

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[10:28 pm]

:D : hey ten
:D : ten
:D : ten :((

chittaphone: what
chittaphone: why are u :(( don't be :((

:D : i'm lonely :(( my boyfriend has abandoned me :((
:D : i want ur company :(

chittaphone: ah
chittaphone: i'll be right there then
chittaphone: i'm not gonna change so ur gonna have to see me in the Atrocious outfit that donghyuck put together for me
chittaphone: tho good use of the fishnets, i suppose

:D : hey i'm sure u look great
:D : plus it's hyuck, he's a fashion icon uwu

chittaphone: ,,,, sure he is buddy
chittaphone: anyway, i'm omw

:D : okie uwu

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[11:27 pm]

:D : henlo

junguwu: hii xuxi uwu
junguwu: how are u baby

:D : i confessed to ten

junguwu: OH
junguwu: HOW DID IT GO

:D : they uh
:D : they said they're figuring their feelings out
:D : they said they're not completely sure if they like me back or not and that it's quite hard for them to understand n that it took a lot of time for them to figure everything out with kun and taeyong, and johnny, too

junguwu: oh, baby :((
junguwu: do you want me to come over?

:D : mm nah it's okay
:D : ten's still here anyway, i'm pretty sure they've fallen asleep on me

junguwu: i'm sorry baby
junguwu: but you don't know what they feel exactly yet

:D : oh i don't mind, don't worry
:D : they're ten's emotions n i respect them, ten can't really change them as they would want to
:D : y'know, as long as it doesn't become awkward, it's okay
:D : as long as they're happy

junguwu: you're so precious, baby
junguwu: it's quite late though, shouldn't you go to sleep as well?

:D : but ten fell asleep on me and i might accidentally wake them up

junguwu: squints
junguwu: you can be gentle n carefully move them
junguwu: get a duvet over yourself and preferably some pyjamas too >:(

:D : but if they wake up, it's gonna be ur fault >:(

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[2:51 am]

chittaphone: how do i let him down easily

junguwu: ten...
junguwu: are you sure?
junguwu: you told me a while ago you didn't know if you liked him and you told him you needed time to figure your feelings out
junguwu: do you really think you're sure about what you feel now?

chittaphone: of course not
chittaphone: i haven't thought about it at all
chittaphone: but i do know that yukhei doesn't have to go through the phase when my feelings fluctuate so badly that one day i want to be dating him and the other i feel like shit for "leading him on"
chittaphone: it's neither good for him nor for me
chittaphone: i'm speaking from experience
chittaphone: he'll be hurt less if i just said no now rather than later

junguwu: and does the feeling fluctuation stay there for long
junguwu: you're still together with kun, taeyong, and johnny

chittaphone: it's,,, a while
chittaphone: it took me two months to actually settle down with the fact that i'm dating taeyong
chittaphone: two months
chittaphone: i didn't tell taeyong, of course
chittaphone: but i honestly felt like shit all throughout those 2 months

junguwu: that's quite the time huh
junguwu: you can explain that to xuxi
junguwu: that'd make him feel better

chittaphone: shit
chittaphone: when he messaged you, did he seem sad?
chittaphone: i tried to make it easier for him n stayed to cuddle to let him know that nothing between us has changed
chittaphone: i would've stayed to cuddle either way tbh
chittaphone: but still
chittaphone: i just
chittaphone: i don't know
chittaphone: it's late i'll just go ro sleep

junguwu: no, he said "as long as it doesn't become awkward" and "as long as they are happy"
junguwu: so... if you're not gonna explain urself to him, just make sure he doesn't feel like it's awkward and,,, don't let anything change between you two
junguwu: goodnight, ten

chittaphone: goodnight, woo, i love you

junguwu: i love you too

Chapter Text

[group chat 'bye-sexuals']
[2:31 pm]

nana: mark
nana: mark
nana: mark
nana: mark
nana: mark
nana: mark lee

rainbow demon: can you not
rainbow demon: just @ him

nana: no i wanna know how many marks it's gonna take to get him here
nana: mark
nana: mark
nana: meerk la

rainbow demon: @country boy
rainbow demon: stop him
rainbow demon: jeno still hasn't muted this group so his phone is going off like crazy

country boy: i was reading the chat anyway
country boy: i would've replied after the 13th mark
country boy: anyway
country boy: what did u want uwu

nana: where are u

country boy: my room
country boy: should i be scared

nana: nah i'm lovely uwu why would u be scared
nana: i need to have a 2 in 1 meeting with u

country boy: a two in one meeting with me
country boy: uh huh
country boy: and that includes what

nana: well, you started dating renjun
nana: so i've got to give you the talk about how i'm gonna break a limb if u hurt them
nana: and then i have to ask you out
nana: so, two in one meeting, yes

demon rainbow: how romantic
demon rainbow: i thought that you'd, like, take him out on a date, give him flowers, pay for a dessert to be customized
demon rainbow: damn

nana: that was the initial thought
nana: but that's too sappy, even for me
nana: i'm not trying to scare him

rainbow demon: yeah, i loved the break a limb part
rainbow demon: who would be scared from that lmao
rainbow demon: also uh
rainbow demon: @country boy did you die
rainbow demon: i expected u'd have a reaction to this

country boy: i'm processing

rainbow demon: ah
rainbow demon: makes sense
rainbow demon: mark's like a giraffe, it takes some time for information to get to him, y'know

nana: huh, looks like i've got a type then

rainbow demon: hey what's that supposed to mean
rainbow demon: oh no i played myself here didn't i

nana: case n point
nana: anyway i'm omw to u, @country boy

rainbow demon: make sure you don't accidentally suffocate him when u hug him

nana: i'm lovely, why would i suffocate him

rainbow demon: shit happens
rainbow demon: just on accident y'know

 

[3:06 pm]

nana: update
nana: we're dating

rainbow demon: mark's taking us all down one by one
rainbow demon: jeno run while you can still save yourself
rainbow demon: be free, little birdie, run

nono: what is this "running" you speak of
nono: sounds disgusting

rainbow demon: it's when u move ur leggy real fast
rainbow demon: and then you just go nyoom

nono: sounds scary
nono: no thanks
nono: i'll stay in bed instead

rainbow demon: oh mood
rainbow demon: can i join u there then
rainbow demon: maybe we can cuddle u-uwu
rainbow demon: and maybe even ki**

demon rainbow: hey no killing

rainbow demon: i didn't mean killimg >:(

demon rainbow: no kicking either
demon rainbow: jeno's a lovely boy don't kick him

rainbow demon: sigh
raimbow demon: jeno are u in ur room

nono: haven't left it in what seems like a hundred years

rainbow demon: sure it does
rainbow demon: i'll be right there
rainbow demon: stretch, ur gonna need ur arms for Instense Cuddling and i require at least 5 kisses
rainbow demon: for maintenance reasons y'know

nono: ur wish is my command uwu

Chapter Text

[private chat with tiny dolphin]
[6:19 pm]

tall baby: you're listening to twice
tall baby: you only listen to twice when you're sad and upset
tall baby: what's wrong

tiny dolphin: wow can u hear my music all the way in ur dorm

tall baby: i can see what ur listening to on spotify sksksk
tall baby: now tell me what's wrong or i'll walk over to your house and cuddle the answer out of you

tiny dolphin: do that
tiny dolphin: that'd make the problem go away

tall baby: >:(

tiny dolphin: hnng i just miss you :((
tiny dolphin: we saw each other today at the dance practice but we haven't actually hung out for a while
tiny dolphin: and god knows how long it's been since we've gone out with the rest
tiny dolphin: i'm just hhh y'know
tiny dolphin: but it's okay
tiny dolphin: i'm just gonna "cheer up baby cheer up baby" y'know
tiny dolphin: i Cannot take myself seriously with this username

[tall baby has changed tiny dolphin 's name to jong jinrak]

jong jinrak: thanks i hate it

tall baby: i don't know what else you want from me
tall baby: this is the best username you've had thus far
tall baby: and as for that, we're going out tomorrow
tall baby: i don't know who we is yet because i haven't talked to anyone
tall baby: but turn the volume higher and just have a blast with twice
tall baby: i'll kidnap someone for tomorrow uwu

jong jinrak: i love you :((

tall baby: yeah but i love you more

jong jinrak: sounds fake
jong jinrak: i love you the most
jong jinrak: top that, bitch
jong jinrak: what is love anyway

tall baby: i wanna know know know know too

jong jinrak: if the melody wasn't as cheerful, the song would actually be a really sad
jong jinrak: poor twice
jong jinrak: my lesbian queens... love will come one day... u'll meet the right person soon...

tall baby: jeongyeon's bi but okay

jong jinrak: if ur at least 2% of any kind of lgbt, ur a lesbian
jong jinrak: all of us are lesbians

tall baby: all of us... this is a two-way chat
tall baby: are u having hallucinations, there's no one else but us

jong jinrak: i meant-
jong jinrak: sigh
jong jinrak: yes i see all the dreams i have given up on

tall baby: i'm torn in between asking if ur okay, saying f, and saying rip
tall baby: are u okay frip
tall baby: but if you want my advice, you just gotta dance the night away, y'know
tall baby: if you wanna have some fun, that is

jong jinrak: ...are you stalking me
jong jinrak: that's literally what came on next on shuffle
jong jinrak: stay back, you fucking demon

tall baby: i thought u missed me

jong jinrak: sigh
jong jinrak: unfortunately i do

tall baby: that's bc u love me

jong jinrak: do i
jong jinrak: do i really

tall baby: yes

jong jinrak: that's true
jong jinrak: i love u lots

tall baby: and i still love you more, my power

jong jinrak: that is untrue, blockt

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[5:29 am]

jong jinrak: guys i just had the worst dream
jong jinrak: nightmare, i meant nightmare
jong jinrak: everything was normal except we were all cishets

cool dad: that's the worst thing i've ever heard
cool dad: please don't scare us like that, we have frail hearts

jong jinrak: i know i'm sorry
jong jinrak: i just had to share it

[9:27 am]

rainbow demon: why the Fuck is this the first thing i have to read this morning
rainbow demon: if i, at any point in my life, turn straight, you're legally required to decapitate me

demon rainbow: can i do it now
demon rainbow: i know ur not straight but i wanna get rid of the evil early

rainbow demon: bestow The Death upon me
rainbow demon: ur legally required to kill me
rainbow demon: end of sentence

nana: oh i'll do it
nana: i'll kill u with my love uwu
nana: smother u with kithes (^ω^)

rainbow demon: anyone who uses the japanese keyboard is invalid
rainbow demon: except jungwoo

prince yuta: that's rude

rainbow demon: i forgot you existed what the fuck
rainbow demon: but you're still invalid
rainbow demon: not bc you use the japanese keyboard, ur exempt from that statement along with jungwoo
rainbow demon: but just in general, ur Not Valid

loselose: i agree
loselose: ur very right
loselose: yuta ur not valid

prince yuta: hey that's not nice :(
prince yuta: why would u say that about ur lovely boyfriend

loselose: i'm not valid either
loselose: we're both not valid!! that's yhe true romance of the 21st century!!

rainbow demon: i can't believe i'm saying this but i actually awwed
rainbow demon: that's disgusting

nana: you never aww about the things i say to you :(
nana: why am i being discriminated against

rainbow demon: bc ur like the least valid person here, right after mark

nana: don't say that about MY BOYFRIEND
nana: MY BOYFRIEND is nice
nana: (mark is my boyfriend, that's the guy, mark, he's my boyfriend)

loselose: y'all are dating?

nana: yes, MY BOYFRIEND and i are dating
nana: uwuwuwuwu
nana: i'd add heart emoticons but they seem to break ao3 sometimes

loselose: to break what
loselose: anyway, nice, i'm happy for u

nana: thank
nana: i'm happy for myself too

country boy: i forgot we didn't actually say it here
country boy: but yeth we're dating

loselose: look out kun mark's gonna break the record for having the most partners
loselose: u've got like... uh, six boyfriends now?

country boy: yep uwu

loselose: kun's got nine, ur catching up

country boy: ksjsjs it's not a competition, it's love

loselose: omg make it a competition
loselose: choose a volunteer - someone who neither of you are dating
loselose: and try to make them fall in love with u
loselose: and it won't even be amoral as long as the person's consenting
loselose: @junguwu @:D @nono i think you guys are the only ones who aren't dating at least one of them
loselose: except for the babies
loselose: @cool dad you in?

cool dad: sure why not
cool dad: as long as that person doesn't mind

:D : i'm in
:D : try me

country boy: was no one going to ask if i'm in

loselose: no
loselose: ur in
loselose: who makes yukhei fall for u first, wins
loselose: ur time starts in ten seconds

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[9:41 am]

country boy: hey xuxi
country boy: i personally think that,,,,, the "competition" is dumb
country boy: but i can't say no to it bc i know that kun Loves competition
country boy: so uh
country boy: yeah
country boy: i'm not trying to make you fall for me bc i think that should just happen on its own
country boy: that being said, do you want to come over, watch a drama, and talk about boys

:D : sounds amazing
:D : when do you want me there
:D : and can we make it a sleepover

country boy: sounds great
country boy: some 6-7 o'clock if ur staying over?
country boy: i'll get snacks and make my room actually not look like a mess anymore until then

:D : okie uwu
:D : i'll be there at around 6:30 then

country boy: aight
country boy: if you've got any snack/drink requests, do tell

:D : i trust your taste

 

[private chat with :D]
[10:00 am]

cool dad: you and me
cool dad: and some bubble tea
cool dad: sound good?

:D : wow you really know how to charm a guy
:D : that sounds great
:D : when?
cool dad: now?
:D : okay but i've got to be back by 6

cool dad: does your evil step mother put your bedtime at 7
cool dad: i'll fight her for u

:D : ksjshd no
:D : mark and i are going to be binging dramas tonight and we're starting early

cool dad: ah, makes sense
cool dad: well, it's only 10 am now so i'll make sure to get you back by then uwu

 

[group chat 'all the family']
[11:56 am]

junguwu: i've got a bad feeling about this
junguwu: if this ends in Anyone's heart getting broken, i'm going to be mad at all of you
junguwu: all of you meaning sicheng, kun, mark, and yukhei

loselose: they're all adults and they knew what they were signing up for
loselose: best case scenario, it works out and all three of them date
loselose: worst case scenario, they're all 78 and kun's still trying to get yukhei to fall in love with him while mark has already forgotten about it

junguwu: i could think of worse scenarios than that one but sure

chittaphone: ^ rt
chittaphone: jungwoo's right, it could end badly

junguwu: thank you ten for being another sane person here

chittaphone: oh i'm far from sane
chittaphone: i'm just agreeing

loselose: no one's going to let anyone get hurt
loselose: even if one of them falls in love with the other yet the other doesn't return the feelings, we're family
loselose: we aren't going to let anyone be hurt
loselose: like, gee, ten, you remember when i liked you
loselose: you let me down so softly that i wanted to thank you for doing so
loselose: i doubt kun/mark/yukhei is going to be any different

chittaphone: i guess that's true
chittaphone: we became even closer after that

:D : we're all Tough, no one's getting hurt

junguwu: you and tough have never been in the same room

chittaphone: xuxi, you're the softest person with the most fragile heart our there and you Must be handled with uttermost care
chittaphone: meaning, ur not tough at all

:D : i- i guess i'm not
:D : i love u both

chittaphone: i love you too

junguwu: i love you more

:D : impossible

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[8:54 pm]

chittaphone: hey
chittaphone: are you free rn?

:D : hii
:D : i'm actually with mark right now
:D : is it anything important?

chittaphone: oh no, everything's alright
chittaphone: i just wanted to talk
chittaphone: but it's nothing that can't wait dw uwu

:D : you sure?

chittaphone: yeah of course
chittaphone: what are u and mark doing?

:D : watching dramas, cuddling, and talking about boys and people uwu
:D : hyuck's supposed to drop by for a little

chittaphone: that's adorable
chittaphone: though isn't he supposed to make you fall in love with him
chittaphone: talking about boys and people doesn't seem like the most successful way of doing that

:D : mark said he wasn't taking this too seriously
:D : and talking about boys n people is Good

chittaphone: that i agree with
chittaphone: boys ain't shit but at the same time... Boys. y'know?

:D : oh i know, trust me i know

chittaphone: ur not included in boys though
chittaphone: ur too good for that category

:D : skjddh stop :((
:D : i love u

chittaphone: i love you too
chittaphone: anyway, go have fun with mark, i'm not gonna interrupt y'all anymore
chittaphone: have a good evening xuxi, love you

:D : you too!!! ilyt!!!

 

[group chat 'all the family']
[9:21 pm]

chittaphone: @moonmoon where's ur boyfriend

moonmoon: which one
moonmoon: the pretty, beautiful, good, sweet one, the stupid one, or the decent one

chittaphone: the first one

moonmoon: oh i'm cuddling with him rn
moonmoon: the stupid one's here too
moonmoon: did you want something

chittaphone: oh no nvm
chittaphone: nothing, i was thinking that sicheng could help me out with something but it's nothing important

loselose: u sure?

chittaphone: yeah ofc

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[9:26 pm]

loselose: you SURE sure?

chittaphone: sksjdh yeah
chittaphone: i just wanted to talk about uhhh a situation i have with xuxi atm but it can wait
chittaphone: cuddle with taeil first

loselose: hm okay

 

[private chat with :D]
[3:47 am]

chittaphone: well you better have the volume off or i'm waking up both you and mark but oh well
chittaphone: basically uhh the other day when i "rejected" you
chittaphone: i didn't exactly explain the situation quite well
chittaphone: thing is, i like you a lot
chittaphone: that sounds childish, i love you, i love you so, so much
chittaphone: and that's basically the reason i had to let you down
chittaphone: i don't want to hurt you
chittaphone: you deserve so much better than a sad dumb fuck with feelings issues
chittaphone: when i start dating people, for the first month or two, my feelings fluctuate a lot and it's really shitty because at one point i could be head over heels over them and then in a few hours i feel like i've lead them on and that i don't actually love them that way
chittaphone: i get used to the change after that month or two and don't feel that way anymore
chittaphone: but the start's,,, hard
chittaphone: and i don't think you have to go through that
chittaphone: you deserve so much better than that, sweetheart
chittaphone: so yeah, i think you're amazing and lovely, and i love you with all my heart, really
chittaphone: but i guess i'm pulling that movie cliche where the love interest doesn't date the person bc they want to protect them or some shit
chittaphone: this is what happens when i stay up until 4 am, sigh
chittaphone: i'm going to sleep
chittaphone: or at least trying to

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[7:19 am]

:D : ten...
:D : i completely understand what you're saying and respect your decision and it's okay with me as long as you're happy
:D : but if the issue is that you're scared of hurting me in one way or another, then i'd like you to re-think that decision
:D : i'm willing to wait as long as it takes
:D : and it's a relationship for a reason, the base of it is communication, as it's been established many times before
:D : we could take it slow at first, if you want that
:D : not put a certain label on what it is that we would have
:D : if you wanted me to leave you alone for a while, i would. if you wanted me to be there, i would
:D : though if your stance on this remains the same, i'm okay with that as well
:D : text me when you're awake?

chittaphone: xuxi, i love you so much
chittaphone: thing is, i'd love for you to be my boyfriend
chittaphone: i've had that idea in mind for... too long
chittaphone: but i want that without the start phase, y'know? without all the doubt and shit
chittaphone: i feel like the without-label and the taking it slow things wouldn't be what makes you the happiest
chittaphone: and i guess me being like this isn't what makes you the happiest either
chittaphone: but this way it's a shortterm hurt until you get over it, if we have that kind of a start phase it's more longterm and it's a constant state of confusion and uncertainty and i know how shitty that is
chittaphone: and you shouldn't have to go through that

:D : i'm willing to, though
:D : you're more than worth it

chittaphone: xuxi, baby... are you sure?

:D : i am

chittaphone: okay
chittaphone: then we can... try. without a definitive label but technically dating
chittaphone: i'm sorry to end it on a note like this but i still haven't slept so i'm going to try to sleep

:D : can i come over?

chittaphone: if mark doesn't mind you leaving him this early
chittaphone: then i'd be happy if you were here

:D : hyuck kicked mark out of the bed in the middle of the night, so he had to leave since renjun who also came over took over mark's place
:D : i doubt anyone's going to mind

chittaphone: then come over
chittaphone: i'd sleep better if i had you by my side

:D : i'm on my way then

chittaphone: i love you

:D : i love you too

Chapter Text

[group chat 'all the family']
[11:23 am]

moonmoon: tip of the day - don't google bird ears

prince yuta: wait
prince yuta: i have never seen a bird's ear
prince yuta: birds have ears
prince yuta: where and what do they look like

moonmoon: do NOT google it
moonmoon: i wondered the same thing, i'm not happy that i know now
moonmoon: you don't want to see that

prince yuta: tip of the day - don't google bird ears

moonmoon: that's why ur the stupid boyfriend

prince yuta: fuck u i'm a delight
prince yuta: i'm uhhhh smart

loselose: yuta ur as dumb as they come
loselose: bright side though
loselose: so is taeil
loselose: i'm the morosexual in this relationship unfortunately

cool dad: i'd say ur all morons

loselose: i mean, yeah
loselose: but i'm slightly less of a moron
loselose: with you i'm the moron and ur the morosexual

moonmoon: everyone's the moron with kun
moonmoon: kun's superior

cool dad: i like the compliment but we're All superior
cool dad: and by us all being superior, we're all equal

prince yuta: that's deep man
prince yuta: *comrade kun

cool dad: wait no
cool dad: yes to equality, no to communism

prince yuta: why not though, comrade kun

cool dad: sigh
cool dad: i need a divorce
cool dad: we live in a capitalist society and profit from it
cool dad: let's not start the communist debate again

loselose: wait
loselose: AGAIN??
loselose: y'all have had communism debates before-
loselose: somehow i'm not too surprised
loselose: but i'm so disappointed

cool dad: honestly? big mood

moonmoon: so one of my boyfriends is a closeted communist, the other one is a capitalist, and the third one is just disappointed
moonmoon: why is this the world i live in

loselose: yep that pretty much covers it
loselose: "just disappointed" is genuinely the best description of me

cool dad: i'm not a capitalist
cool dad: i just enjoy the benefits of capitalism
cool dad: okay maybe that makes me a capitalist
cool dad: but that's not one of my defining traits

prince yuta: i'm not
prince yuta: i'm not a closeted communist

loselose: are you saying you're a communist that isn't closeted
loselose: or that you're neither a communist nor closeted

prince yuta: yes

loselose: that's fair i guess
loselose: why am i cursed with such boyfriends, god pls what did i do to u

cool dad: we're not that bad
cool dad: i mean
cool dad: we are
cool dad: but you're just as bad
cool dad: so we're meant to be
cool dad: we're your destiny uwu

loselose: i hate my destiny

prince yuta: we're so much better than what u make us to be :(
prince yuta: we love u, that's a redeeming quality

loselose: no, it just shows how bad of a taste you have
loselose: that's an uhh deeming?? quality?? what'e the opposite of redeeming

moonmoon: hey what did i do wrong

loselose: ...ur somewhat valid
loselose: barely though
loselose: you're slightly more valid than everyone else
loselose: but still barely valid

moonmoon: i'll take that

cool dad: that's fair

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[1:27 pm]

country boy: xuxi
country boy: can you pls save me

:D : from what or whom

country boy: donghyuck
country boy: he's going to kill me
country boy: we're cuddling and he's suffocating me

:D : owo
:D : omw

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[1:43 pm]

country boy: renjun can you pls help
country boy: xuxi and donghyuck are suffocating me

demon rainbow: see i'd help but if i go there i'm somehow going to end up in the middle of y'all and i'm not letting that happen

country boy: pleathe
country boy: i'm your boyfriend, have some mercy

demon rainbow: eh
demon rainbow: suffer, bitch

country boy: you're mean
country boy: what did i ever do to you to deserve this

demon rainbow: let's start with your existence
demon rainbow: do i really have to continue after that

country boy: sigh, i guess not
country boy: but if i end up dead, it's going to be your fault

demon rainbow: you're being dramatic
demon rainbow: but fine, i'll get you out of that situation
demon rainbow: you'll owe me then though

country boy: i'll give you everything i have

demon rainbow: i'll keep you to your word uwu
demon rainbow: you'll be free in a few minutes uwu

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[1:54 pm]

demon rainbow: kun
demon rainbow: do you want to help your favourite child AND your boyfriend, AND your future boyfriend out all at once

cool dad: ...suspicious
cool dad: i'm listening though

demon rainbow: xuxi and donghyuck are cuddling mark and mark does not currently want to be cuddled
demon rainbow: so if you could ask xuxi out right now, you'd be helping your boyfriend out and getting closer to getting another boyfriend and helping ur favourite child - me
demon rainbow: bc then mark would owe me uwu

cool dad: inch resting
cool dad: will do, wait

 

[private chat with :D]
[2:19 pm]

cool dad: hey xuxi uwu
cool dad: i'm making cake, do u wanna come help out
cool dad: i'll let you eat some of the frosting

:D : interesting suggestion
:D : but what's more important than frosting is whether or not i get hugs

cool dad: most definitely

:D : how many are you offering
:D : you have to know that it costs a lot to get me there

cool dad: hmm
cool dad: you get All Of The Hugs

:D : that's such a good cost
:D : i'll be there in five minutes

cool dad: i'll be waiting uwu

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[2:26 pm]

country boy: xuxi is now gone but donghyuck is still trying to suffocate me
country boy: u've only fulfilled half of our deal

demon rainbow: just wait a little uwu

 

[private chat with nana]
[2:27 pm]

demon rainbow: nana go to donghyuck and cuddle the shit out of him

nana: interesting suggestion
nana: why though

demon rainbow: because you love me uwu
demon rainbow: and don't start cuddling mark pls

nana: WHY
nana: I WANT TO CUDDLE WITH MARK

demon rainbow: you can do that at any other time
demon rainbow: if you don't cuddle with mark, he'll owe me a favour

nana: hm
nana: if i don't cuddle with him, will you owe me a favour too

demon rainbow: no
demon rainbow: but i'm up for a twenty minute makeout session

nana: make it thirty and it's a deal

demon rainbow: consider it done
demon rainbow: just free mark

nana: omw uwu

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[2:36 pm]

country boy: I'M FREE

demon rainbow: hehe and now u owe me
demon rainbow: come over :)

country boy: oh no i'm scared

demon rainbow: do it

country boy: sigh
country boy: on my way

 

[group chat 'bye-sexuals']
[2:49 pm]

country boy: after all the struggle i went through to not have to cuddle anyone
country boy: i ended up owing renjun
country boy: and renjun made me cuddle them
country boy: i do not understand this world

demon rainbow: shut up and deal with it
demon rainbow: you love me anyway

country boy: unfortunately

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[1:29 pm]

actual angel: i just walked in on
actual angel: kun and xuxi
actual angel: making out
actual angel: i'm scarred for life now

chittaphone: oh mood
chittaphone: i walked in on them yesterday when they were making cake and their hug seemed Very Sensual

actual angel: i guess kun won then
actual angel: first time i'm rooting for mark and kun still wins

chittaphone: life's unfair

actual angel: damn that's deep
actual angel: it's not but y'know, i said what i said ig

chittaphone: wait what even was the point of this competition thing
chittaphone: like, what do they get
chittaphone: except a new boyfriend ig

actual angel: bragging rights
actual angel: y'know how men are

chittaphone: yeah i got so done with men that i decided not to be one
chittaphone: and yet i still have three and a half boyfriends
chittaphone: sigh

actual angel: and a half
actual angel: how exactly does that work

chittaphone: oh uhh
chittaphone: xuxi and i are, y'know, dating but without the label of dating?
chittaphone: at least at first
chittaphone: y'know, bc of my feelings issues n shit

actual angel: ah
actual angel: that's nice, i'm happy for you guys
actual angel: i still don't get your type though
actual angel: there's johnny and xuxi that could be grouped together
actual angel: and then there's kun and me, who are grouped entirely differently

chittaphone: y'all are subs

actual angel: is this an attack
actual angel: i feel attacked
actual angel: also kun's... not a sub
chittaphone: he's a sub compared to me

actual angel: okay yeah that's fair
actual angel: this whole time i tried to figure out your type and it was just that easy huh
actual angel: mind blowing

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[5:57 pm]

rainbow demon: i'm sad
demon rainbow: oh no why
demon rainbow: who do i have to beat up
rainbow demon: me
rainbow demon: i SHOULDN'T be sad!!!
rainbow demon: i should be happy!!!

demon rainbow: why are you sad, love

rainbow demon: hnng mark and xuxi were making out
rainbow demon: and on one hand - i'm happy!!! for both mark and xuxi!!!! if they're happy with each other, then i'm more than glad!!
rainbow demon: but idk, i just kinda,,, was hoping that i could, y'know, finally confess to xuxi
rainbow demon: but now with this stupid competition shit
rainbow demon: i can't even do that and when they start all dating, i won't be able to say what i feel too and i'm just hhh about that y'know
rainbow demon: i've been crushing on him for,,,,, a year now, i'm pretty sure
rainbow demon: yet there has never been a good time

demon rainbow: oh :(
demon rainbow: you should tell him what you feel
demon rainbow: don't let the competition keep you from that
demon rainbow: ten and xuxi started half dating a few days ago
demon rainbow: you shouldn't worry about a bad timing
demon rainbow: any time you tell him will be a good time

rainbow demon: :(( i love you
rainbow demon: come over?

demon rainbow: can nana come too
demon rainbow: we're together rn

rainbow demon: perfect
rainbow demon: come here uwu

demon rainbow: on our way

[private chat with loselose]
[9:05 pm]

:D : so uh what defines "falling for someone"

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D ]
[9:21 pm]

loselose: owo
loselose: well, if you've got to ask that question
loselose: i think you've fallen for the guy you've fallen for
loselose: so, who wins

:D : ...
:D : both of them

loselose: i
loselose: who won first then??

:D : b-both of them??
:D : i don't know?????
:D : i kissed kun first but only because i saw him first???
:D : aaaaaaaa??

loselose: sigh
loselose: are you dating both of them now at least
loselose: if not, i'm going to throw something at you, 二屄

:D : ,,, i'm dating,,, kun
:D : but uhh, not mark
:D : not yet at least

loselose: i'm going to
loselose: murder you
loselose: do i have to ask mark out for you

:D : ksjshd i'll do it
:D : just... wait

loselose: for how long do i have to wait
loselose: xuxi
loselose: if y'all aren't dating in the next five minutes
loselose: i'm going to get renjun and they're going to choke you to death

:D : hey renjun's lovely :(
:D : they wouldn't do that, stop spreading lies

loselose: yeah uh
loselose: jisung would definitely disagree with you there but okay
loselose: tell mark to date you jesus christ

:D : skjzhs alright uwu

 

[private chat with country boy]
[9:47 pm]

:D : hey mark
:D : about, uh, earlier
:D : let'sdatepls

country boy: i
country boy: i'd be more than glad to
country boy: that was unexpected but wow i'm happy

:D : !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
:D : i have scored two whole boyfriends in one day
:D : and both of them, absolutely amazing and lovely
:D : and tiny

country boy: HEY I'M NOT TINY
country boy: I'M AVERAGE SIZED

:D : ur fun sized and that's adorable :((

country boy: no!!!!! i'm average!!!!
country boy: taeil, renjun, and ten are tiny!!!!! i'm normal sized
country boy: you're just freakishly illegally tall

:D : i'm average in bosnia and herzegovina!!!!! i'm not that tall

country boy: w-where
country boy: how do you even KNOW that

:D : it's a country in europe
:D : and i'm under average in the dinaric alps!!!!

country boy: WHAT KIND OF GIANTS
country boy: XUXI PLS
country boy: okay so
country boy: you're tiny but you're also a giant, okay
country boy: you're a baby but a giant baby

:D : hnng
:D : okay i'll accept that

country boy: and i'm at least average

:D : no you're small :((
:D : absolutely adorable :(((

country boy: i,,, xuxi pls
country boy: sigh
country boy: it's impossible to argue with you

:D : uwuwu
:D : yeah don't argue with your BOYFRIEND
:D : arguing with ur BOYFRIEND isn't nice

country boy: skshgd
country boy: i'd never uwu
country boy: i love u

:D : i love u too :((
:D : anyway, i'm gonna go to sleep rly soon so i need to go take a shower and get back to ten uwu

country boy: okay uwu
country boy: goodnight xuxi i love u sleep well
country boy: and don't drown

:D : KSJSK
:D : i'll try not to skjssh
:D : i love u more goodnight sweet dreams

 

[group chat 'all the family']
[1:51 am]

junguwu: is anyone awake?
junguwu: i can't sleep n maybe talking to someone about anything could help me fall asleep again

chittaphone: i'm awake
chittaphone: you can come over to my room
chittaphone: xuxi's here too, he's asleep so i can't come to u bc if i wake him up, that'd be a tragedy

junguwu: oh uh won't you mind?
junguwu: i mean, like, as in the space
junguwu: ur bed isn't the largest one out there
junguwu: and xuxi and i are, y'know, space consuming

chittaphone: there have been three average sized people and a giant sleeping in this bed at the same time
chittaphone: i'm sure it'll hold out an average sized person and two giants

junguwu: okay
junguwu: then i'm coming over ( ◠‿◠ )

Chapter Text

[group chat 'dreamies and a nightmare']
[9:39 am]

country boy: hey, y'all wanna go on a quadruple date
country boy: is that how it's spelled
country boy: sigh idk, spelling is hard

jong jinrak: a what
jong jinrak: either i don't speak korean anymore or you said 'quadruple date'
jong jinrak: as in, a date with four couples

country boy: yeah
country boy: you and jisung, me and xuxi, renjun and donghyuck, and jeno and jaemin
country boy: or, y'know, however they divide themselves up

jong jinrak: huh
jong jinrak: jisung and i are all in for that

nono: jaemin and i too!!
nono: renjun says they'd love that
nono: @rainbow demon you coming?

rainbow demon: uh
rainbow demon: i think i'm gonna have to skip this time

:D : aw :(( why?

rainbow demon: i'm not feeling so well
rainbow demon: i'll spend some time in bed today and rest, maybe watch some dramas
rainbow demon: i'd come but i'm rly not feeling that well :((

:D : i hope you feel better soon!!
:D : do you want me to buy you some bubble tea when we're coming back uwu

rainbow demon: ah you don't have to, don't bother
rainbow demon: i'll be just fine either way

:D : :( okay
:D : if you want anything, though, tell me, okay?

rainbow demon: okay uwu

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[9:51 am]

demon rainbow: do you want me to stay with you instead?
demon rainbow: we can binge dramas and get some ice cream if you want to

rainbow demon: ah no, it's alright
rainbow demon: you should go, have fun, send me some selfies of y'all
rainbow demon: don't worry, i'm just being dumb
rainbow demon: i just need some time to actually, y'know, completely understand that and get over it

demon rainbow: :( you sure? 'cause i rly don't mind staying with you

rainbow demon: no, you should go!!
rainbow demon: some alone time will only be good for me

demon rainbow: okay but i'm coming to see you when we get back >:(
demon rainbow: at least for a little
demon rainbow: hug u, kith u and if you want to, we can cuddle too uwu

rainbow demon: that sounds perfect
rainbow demon: now go, have fun with everyone uwu

demon rainbow: hey maybe you want xuxi to come to you afterwards?
demon rainbow: and, idk, you could talk about everything
demon rainbow: i mean, he most likely likes you back
demon rainbow: you could confess

rainbow demon: he just started dating mark
rainbow demon: i don't want to take that away from them

demon rainbow: no offence but that's bs
demon rainbow: you started dating jaemin and jeno the same day

rainbow demon: yeah but that's different, jaemin and jeno a) are a package deal, buy one get both (that discount expired with mark though, i guess), b) both talked about it beforehand and didn't mind it
rainbow demon: while i haven't talked to mark about confessing or anything likewise

demon rainbow: jaemin asked mark out the day after i started dating him and i don't mind that
demon rainbow: wait was i supposed to mind that

rainbow demon: stop having a point all the time
rainbow demon: i'll think about it, now Go

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[11:10 pm]

chittaphone: how would you describe me

cool dad: what
cool dad: what do you mean
cool dad: like, look-wise or personality-wise

chittaphone: either, neither, both, idk
chittaphone: just… how would you describe me

cool dad: hm
cool dad: well, you’re short
cool dad: but you’re very pretty
cool dad: you have the most adorable nose
cool dad: and the cutest hands
cool dad: you’re honest and aren’t afraid to say what you think
cool dad: one of the reasons i absolutely fell in love with you, to be honest
cool dad: you have this aura of chaos even if you know what you’re doing
cool dad: that doesn’t happen often but still
cool dad: you act like you dislike skinship a lot but let us cuddle you whenever we want and never refuse
cool dad: you like to make people feel special and that’s one of the best things about you
cool dad: you care so much but you don’t show it a lot, yet we all know

chittaphone: wow i was expecting something along the lines of “short twink with issues”
chittaphone: i love you so much

cool dad: i mean, that too but those aren’t your defining traits
cool dad: more like “short adorable twink that is impossible to not love”

chittaphone: oh fuck off don’t make me soft now
chittaphone: you’ve already done it but don't make me even softer

cool dad: how would you describe me? i’m curious now

chittaphone: the most beautiful man on this entire planet and out of it
chittaphone: it’s impossible to not fall for you the second a person meets you
chittaphone: you just radiate… goodness, y’know? your energy is just good
chittaphone: you’re the best person and it shows, you don’t even have to speak to a person for them to just know that you’re nice
chittaphone: soft
chittaphone: caring
chittaphone: nonjudgmental
chittaphone: just… chill, you seem like someone that a person would just want to sit and talk with for hours, maybe get high with
chittaphone: i dunno
chittaphone: i guess your defining trait is just - good
chittaphone: i fell in love with you the same moment i saw you for the first time

cool dad: i love you
cool dad: so very much

chittaphone: i love you more
chittaphone: fuck i’m soft now

cool dad: where are you
cool dad: can i come cuddle you?

chittaphone: yes please
chittaphone: i’m in my room

cool dad: i’m coming over then
cool dad: do you want me to take some tea or chocolate?

chittaphone: mm you’re sweet enough

cool dad: ten please have mercy on my weak heart
cool dad: i already said i love you what more do you want from me

chittaphone: for you to know that i love you most and that i’ll stop at Nothing to prove it to you
chittaphone: now come over, i can’t wait all night

cool dad: on my way, prepare to be cuddled immensely

chittaphone: i’m all prepared, all i need now is you

Chapter Text

[group chat ”kun’s boyfies”]
[2:37 pm]

cool dad: should i just add jungwoo here so we have a chat without the kids
cool dad: ’cause the only one that’s not here from adults is jungwoo

rabbit(ch): yeah add him
rabbit(ch): not like we talk about anything that he shouldn’t know

cool dad: aight

[cool dad added junguwu]

junguwu: uh
junguwu: i don’t remember starting to date you but fair enough, i guess this is my life now

[cool dad changed group name to ”kun’s boyfies + jungwoo”]

cool dad: this would be more accurate

junguwu: wow i feel special
junguwu: anyway i’d love to chat with you but i currently have a crying child to tend to
junguwu: see you later

cool dad: a what
cool dad: wait who’s crying
cool dad: why

junguwu: donghyuck and idk why. he hasn’t told me
junguwu: i’ll be back when he calms down

cool dad: okay, tell me if there’s anything i can do

:D : oh no :(
:D : let me know if i can do anything, too :(

[3:54 pm]

junguwu: i’m back
junguwu: may i ask why i was added

:D : is hyuck okay?

junguwu: he’ll be just right, don’t worry
junguwu: just had to let some things out
junguwu: as we all do sometimes

cool dad: you sure he’s alright?

junguwu: yeah he just needed to cry a little
junguwu: we’re watching animal videos now to cheer up

cool dad: okay that’s good
cool dad: and i added you because we need a chat with, y’know, the adults and why make a new one when there was one that only missed you

junguwu: ah that makes sense
junguwu: i thought that my dreams came true and i had started dating you all out of a sudden

cool dad: huh

junguwu: literal dreams, i mean- not like dreams as in life goals or smth
junguwu: i dream about a lot of random stuff
junguwu: oh fuck it
junguwu: wanna date?

cool dad: HUH

actual angel: i think he just went into shock
actual angel: it’s what he deserves

junguwu: my question has an Expiration Date ಠ_ಠ

cool dad: yes
cool dad: yes i’d love to date you
cool dad: who wouldn’t

junguwu: (^ω^ )
junguwu: to be fair though, i had dreamt about that, it wasn’t my Life Goal™️
junguwu: okay i mean everyone’s life goal is to date you but you get what i mean

:D : that
:D : just happened

chittaphone: trust me xuxi that’s not the weirdest way some of us have started dating
chittaphone: also, congrats, y’all already are a power couple

:D : i’m not saying this is a weird way to start dating, i’m saying i’m Surprised
:D : i just didn’t expect this to happen
:D : at least not in a group chat skshhs

junguwu: i’m not the one to waste an opportunity c:
junguwu: what are weirder ways y’all started dating

chittaphone: kun made taeyong ask mark whether or not he was gonna date him

cool dad: only bc mark was avoiding me
cool dad: i couldn’t ask him myself

junguwu: why was mark avoiding you
junguwu: and how did you decide that a good thing to ask a person who’s avoiding you would be whether or not they wanted to date you

cool dad: that’s what he does to all of his crushes
cool dad: i had to shoot my shot

junguwu: fair enough

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[4:12 pm]

:D : hey would hyuck mind if i came over?
:D : i don’t want him to be sad :(

junguwu: he’ll be alright, baby
junguwu: i don’t think he wants a lot of company right now
junguwu: text him later today and check in with him, yeah?

:D : okay :(
:D : tell him i lov him and that i’ll fight whatever or whoever is bothering him

junguwu: i’ll make sure to do that
junguwu: love you

:D : love you more

junguwu: impossible

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[6:37 pm]

:D : hey hyuckie
:D : how are u

rainbow demon: hii xuxi c:
rainbow demon: i’m good uwu
rainbow demon: i wasn’t feeling that well earlier but i’m all better now hehe

:D : i’m glad uwu
:D : i Can and Will whatever and/or whoever makes you upset >:(

rainbow demon: you may find that harder than you think
rainbow demon: it’d impossible for you to do it, You’re Baby

:D : i’m >:(
:D : big and scary!!!

rainbow demon: more like tiny and adorable, and baby
rainbow demon: the only one who’s scary is ten and i respect them for that
rainbow demon: you’re far from that especially because i Know you

:D : that’s fair
:D : but i’m still Strong and Can Defend

rainbow demon: no need for that uwu
rainbow demon: you could cuddle me, though
rainbow demon: i’ve heard that’s ur speciality

:D : owo it is
:D : i’ll be right there uwu

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[6:49 pm]

rainbow demon: can you believe how much of an idiot i am

demon rainbow: i don’t think you’ve reached your peak yet
demon rainbow: you only lose brain cells, you don’t grow new ones anymore
demon rainbow: what made you realize that you are, indeed, an idiot, though?

rainbow demon: i just cried on jungwoo’s shoulder bc i like xuxi so much
rainbow demon: so i thought ”hey maybe i shouldn’t hang out with him and keep cuddling him every other day”
rainbow demon: but i just invited him to cuddle me

demon rainbow: oh that’s so valid
demon rainbow: who doesn’t want to cuddle xuxi 24/7
demon rainbow: just confess to him
demon rainbow: nothing bad can stem from it
demon rainbow: is stem the word i was supposed to use
demon rainbow: idk i barely speak chinese at this point, korean is declining as well

rainbow demon: a) umm yes??? a lot of bad things could happen???
rainbow demon: b) idfk, i’m illiterate in every language on this planet

demon rainbow: a) like what? xuxi kisses ur forehead instead of ur cheek?
demon rainbow: b) big mood

rainbow demon: he could?? reject me?? and think it’s weird??? and not cuddle me ever again???
rainbow demon: i cannot take that kind of risk

demon rainbow: i think you’ve reached peak dumbassery
demon rainbow: i think this is it, finally
demon rainbow: there isn’t a single thing you could say that would be dumber than what you just said
demon rainbow: you would have to pay xuxi to not cuddle you
demon rainbow: IF he decided to not like you back, he would apologize to you for it like a million times and start cuddling you even more often
demon rainbow: but he definitely likes you back
demon rainbow: ur like… his favourite person ever

rainbow demon: i’m the president of xuxi’s fan club
rainbow demon: but hh
rainbow demon: what if that: doesn’t happen
rainbow demon: and i have to be sad and not ever receive affection from xuxi ever again
rainbow demon: that would be hell on earth

demon rainbow: good thing that would never happen, buddy

rainbow demon: ew don’t call me buddy, i’m ur boyfriend
rainbow demon: anyway gtg my favourite boy is here

demon rainbow: see you later uwu love you

rainbow demon: i love u too

Chapter Text

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[9:51 pm]

rainbow demon: i’m officially your dumbest boyfriend

demon rainbow: you weren’t before?
demon rainbow: but what makes you slander yourself once again this evening? i’m intrigued

rainbow demon: no, before mark was ur dumbest boyfriend, now it’s me
rainbow demon: i’m officially dumber than mark lee

demon rainbow: oh sry i have blocked mark out of existence, he doesn’t exist
demon rainbow: so, like, ur the dumbest one. if mark was real and not just a figment of our collective imagination, he would be the dumbest

rainbow demon: ah yes of course

demon rainbow: anyway what makes you say such things about urself

rainbow demon: well, first of all, my entire existence just in general
rainbow demon: i am now dating xuxi
rainbow demon: but the way i started dating him,,,,,, Oh Person,,,,,

demon rainbow: is that the gender-neutral of oh boy

rainbow demon: yes
rainbow demon: pls don’t interrupt

demon rainbow: okay thank you continue

rainbow demon: as i was saying, xuxi and i are dating now
rainbow demon: stop typing you can congratulate us later
rainbow demon: but you know how i confessed to him?
rainbow demon: he started gushing about mark to me and i was like ”yeah my crush is perfect as well, fucking love him” and then i started sobbing AGAIN because ”oh no i’m never gonna date my crush”
rainbow demon: and xuxi just tried to comfort me but it didn’t work rly well
rainbow demon: and i kept saying how great my crush was ”he’s so nice and friendly, i love him, he’s so perfect” and then i accidentally said ”i like you so much” and he,,, heard that
rainbow demon: and i went Oh No
rainbow demon: and he said that he likes me
rainbow demon: and then i said that i like him again
rainbow demon: and he asked me out

demon rainbow: i
demon rainbow: you really are dumber than mark lee huh
demon rainbow: how did you manage that
demon rainbow: also,,,,,,,, damn
demon rainbow: is it that easy to date xuxi
demon rainbow: gotta try it sometime
demon rainbow: anyway
demon rainbow: i’m happy for you guys, ur the perfect couple uwu

rainbow demon: squints
rainbow demon: so you like xuxi too

demon rainbow: let’s be real here
demon rainbow: who the fuck doesn’t
demon rainbow: it’s what he deserves

rainbow demon: true
rainbow demon: xuxi’s the best boy

demon rainbow: he really is
demon rainbow: the only valid one at that

rainbow demon: yep, no one else but xuxi, the world would be so much better if that happened

demon rainbow: him and a few others bc he would want to cuddle

rainbow demon: oh true
rainbow demon: i volunteer as tribute

demon rainbow: i think we All do

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[11:00 pm]

:D : we’re dating!!

junguwu: is that a statement about you and me
junguwu: or have you started dating someone

:D : hyuckie and i!!!
:D : we’re together!!!!!!

junguwu: OH MY GOD
junguwu: FINALLY
junguwu: I’M SO HAPPY FOR YOU TWO
junguwu: UR GONNA TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT IT TOMORROW

:D : YETH!!!
:D : i’m so lucky, all my boyfriends are just… perfect
:D : wow

junguwu: go compliment hyuck instead
junguwu: or better yet, go to sleep >:(
junguwu: i love you

:D : yeah we’re gonna sleep in a few uwu
:D : i love you more

junguwu: impossible

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D ]
[12:34 am]

chittaphone: hi i hope you’re sleeping rn
chittaphone: just wanted to say that i’m happy for u and hyuck
chittaphone: jungwoo came over so he told me, i didn’t stalk you sksjd
chittaphone: but yeah
chittaphone: i’m so glad y’all are finally together

 

[private chat with ten’s old phone]
[12:39 am]

chittaphone: and i’m so sorry i can’t give you the same thing so fast

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[12:40 am]

junguwu: who are you texting?
junguwu: sleep :(
junguwu: i came here so you would cuddle me and we could sleep :((

chittaphone: oh sorry
chittaphone: i was telling xuxi that i was happy for him and hyuck
chittaphone: why didn’t you ask that out loud tho
chittaphone: we’re in the same room
chittaphone: the same bed, literally

junguwu: i like the silence
junguwu: as much as i’d love to hear your voice, love, i also enjoy silence
junguwu: you can’t really get it that often
junguwu: gotta take in as much of it as you can

chittaphone: ah, i understand
chittaphone: we’re scarily similar
chittaphone: i used to say basically the same thing to johnny
chittaphone: though i’ve started to sleep alone lately, you and xuxi have been recent exceptions
chittaphone: but not too frequently either

junguwu: hm i’m honoured
junguwu: unrelated but do you even know how pretty you are
junguwu: i knew before
junguwu: but, like, i just looked up at you and wow, y’know?

chittaphone: damn you really are sleep deprived huh
chittaphone: let’s sleep before you say something else

junguwu: when i lack sleep, i only become more honest
junguwu: ask me anything, i’ll be honest
junguwu: apparently i also get daring huh

chittaphone: hm?
chittaphone: i’ll take you up on that offer
chittaphone: do you think i’m good enough for xuxi
chittaphone: and what should i change to be better for him and all my boyfriends in general

junguwu: i think you’re great
junguwu: xuxi wouldn’t fall for you if you weren’t good enough
junguwu: xuxi likes complex personalities and you are one
junguwu: don’t change anything about yourself, you're perfect
junguwu: no, wait
junguwu: only thing i can tell you to change is to communicate about your problems more
junguwu: you texted something to your old phone again, i saw
junguwu: you should talk about that with an actual person instead of just ranting to your old phone

chittaphone: ah
chittaphone: i just don’t want to bother anyone because of my dumb problems that aren’t even actual problems but rather particularly stupid thoughts i sometimes get
chittaphone: plus, i know they’re wrong, i don’t need someone else to tell me that i’m just being dumb but in nicer words

junguwu: would you rather no one responded
junguwu: you try to make it an illusion that someone’s reading but you don’t want a reply, huh

chittaphone: i mean, yeah, that’s basically it
chittaphone: i want someone to know but i don’t want someone to respond to me bc i already know what they’d say

junguwu: tell me
junguwu: i won’t reply
junguwu: won’t even mention it

chittaphone: next time
chittaphone: i promise
chittaphone: it’s late, we should sleep

junguwu: okay
junguwu: i’ll keep you to your word

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[9:19 am]

here’s Johnald: hey
here’s Johnald: i miss u :(
here’s Johnald: we haven’t actually hung out in a while :(

chittaphone: hey baby!!
chittaphone: we could go somewhere together today, or stay in and watch movies if you’d like c:

here’s Johnald: wow that sounds perfect
here’s Johnald: let’s go out, maybe take some photos
here’s Johnald: when are you free?

chittaphone: uh i have jungwoo currently asleep on me
chittaphone: so whenever he wakes up, i guess?
chittaphone: we fell asleep at around 1 am, so he should be awake pretty soon

here’s Johnald: to be safe, we could go at 1?
here’s Johnald: get an ice cream, walk around a park
here’s Johnald: something like that

chittaphone: that’s perfect
chittaphone: that’s basically a recreation of our first date
chittaphone: you were so adorable, i’m soft
chittaphone: you still are adorable, fuck
chittaphone: did you know i’m in love with you

here’s Johnald: i’m gonna kiss you so much :(
here’s Johnald: i love you but MORE
here’s Johnald: and ur always soft, don’t even try it, mx ten

chittaphone: no i am not this is slander i do not deserve this don’t be mean to me
chittaphone: i’m the opposite of soft
chittaphone: not hard but,,, not soft either okay
chittaphone: don’t be a bully

here’s Johnald: i’m sorry you’re anti-fact, i can’t do anything about it
here’s Johnald: it’s just true

chittaphone: this is it, i’m not kissing you >:(
chittaphone: i’m not soft, a soft person wouldn’t do this hehe

here’s Johnald: oh no
here’s Johnald: you’re uhh
here’s Johnald: you’re hard, very hard
here’s Johnald: not soft at all

chittaphone: i’m not hard either
chittaphone: yet ;)

here’s Johnald: blockt
here’s Johnald: i take that as a personal attack

chittaphone: good
chittaphone: as you should

here’s Johnald: i’ll tell on you >:(
here’s Johnald: don’t attack

chittaphone: It’s What You Deserve
chittaphone: anyway mwah
chittaphone: i’ll see you later, baby, okay?
chittaphone: i’ll cuddle jungwoo a bit, i’m getting a bit cold

here’s Johnald: okay mwah uwu ily

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[9:27 am]

:D : hii!!
:D : thank you i love u
:D : hyuck says thanks as well uwu
:D : he told me that now that he’s dating me, he feels connected to you on a spiritual level and that both of you have galaxy brains
:D : which i, personally, agree with

chittaphone: i think hyuck needs some more sleep
chittaphone: and i think you need to be smooched so tell that to hyuck, i deem that as his job now
chittaphone: there can never be too many kisses given to u
chittaphone: you deserve All of them

:D : aaaaa stop :( i love u
:D : i have a weak heart, you know i can’t handle softness

chittaphone: yeah but you deserve softness :(
chittaphone: you are the only person who i can never ever be mean to
chittaphone: that alone means you deserve softness and softness ONLY

:D : stop :(( or i’m gonna smooch you :(( pls :((

chittaphone: sorry i have to declare the truth as much as i can
chittaphone: my dearest, xuxi
chittaphone: i absolutely adore you and love and respect you because you deserve no less than that

:D : next time i see you…
:D : There is going to be a smooch.

chittaphone: i’ll hold u to ur word

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D ]
[12:52 pm]

demon rainbow: wong yukhei
demon rainbow: huang xuxi
demon rainbow: lucas

:D : oh no i’m scared
:D : what

demon rainbow: ur dating two of my boyfriends
demon rainbow: subject m*rk l** and subject lee donghyuck
demon rainbow: has anyone given you the talk yet

:D : what’s the talk
:D : no one has, no
:D : i’m scared

demon rainbow: don’t be scared :) i’m lovely
demon rainbow: it’s the talk about how hyuck and mark should be treated
demon rainbow: and what could potentially happen if you didn’t follow through with those rules
demon rainbow: laws, i’d even say

:D : i’m listening
:D : mistreating either of them is punishable by death, that i already know

demon rainbow: you forgot the before death torture period
demon rainbow: carried out by me personally

:D : ah yes, of course, i’m sorry

demon rainbow: anyway, let’s start with hyuck
demon rainbow: he requires at least seven kisses a day if u get to meet him
demon rainbow: if not, they just stack up
demon rainbow: e.g. you don’t meet him on monday, so u kiss him 14 times on tuesday

:D : that sounds very doable
:D : pls continue

demon rainbow: as well as 3 hugs or more
demon rainbow: bonus points for half an hour of cuddling
demon rainbow: he also has to get a lot of praise because it’s what he deserves for being the bestest boy ever
demon rainbow: when he listens to girl groups A Lot, he’s sad so watch out for that
demon rainbow: and let him sit on ur lap, he needs it for maintenance reasons
demon rainbow: sometimes he’ll want you to sit on his lap but don’t do that bc he’s very fragile and can be crushed easily
demon rainbow: instead make him sit on urs, he’ll protest but if u kiss him, he’ll melt and love sitting on ur lap
demon rainbow: that’s basically the Lee Donghyuck Manual

:D : i’d be more than glad to fulfil all of those points thank you for telling me

demon rainbow: good
demon rainbow: now as for mark
demon rainbow: he’s very complex
demon rainbow: he loves skinship but he’ll never actually tell you that unless he’s sleep deprived
demon rainbow: he’ll tell u all the secrets when he’s sleep deprived

:D : jungwoo’s literally the same
:D : for the sleep part, he loves skinship
:D : anyway sorry for interrupting, pls continue

demon rainbow: don’t try too hard to hug him or kiss him or anything so it’s not a thing of pressure
demon rainbow: but rather sit in a close distance if him and soon u’ll find him in ur arms rly soon
demon rainbow: it’s like a magnet just pulls him towards u
demon rainbow: mark also needs to hear praise all the mf time because it’s what he deserves but don’t tell him i said that
demon rainbow: and that’s mark lee manual

:D : very insightful, thank u

demon rainbow: and as to what will happen if you don’t follow through on everything - i’ll face you in a one on one combat in which i’ll win
demon rainbow: because i have to defend my boyfriends’ honour
demon rainbow: and then you shall be executed

:D : that’s completely fair
:D : i’d let you

demon rainbow: i’m glad we’re on the same page here uwu
demon rainbow: love u

:D : love u too

Chapter Text

[group chat ’all the family’]
[4:32 pm]

demon rainbow: y’all, i’m a lesbian

chittaphone: inch resting
chittaphone: what has lead you to this conclusion?

demon rainbow: flannel, short, specs, feminist, good fashion choices
demon rainbow: also girls? awesome

chittaphone: y’all i think i’m a lesbian
chittaphone: taeil is a potential lesbian

moonmoon: how could you out me like that
moonmoon: yuta’s a lesbian

prince yuta: i am
prince yuta: lesbian rights!

moonmoon: i read that as you declaring yourself as lesbian rights
moonmoon: which isn’t completely untrue but y’know

prince yuta: don’t offend lesbians like that
prince yuta: i’m not the definition of lesbian rights
prince yuta: johnny is
prince yuta: he’s the lesbian leader

chittaphone: omg he really is
chittaphone: like at least half of us are lesbians

here’s Johnald: i heard my name
here’s Johnald: okay i didn’t know this would be the context but i’m honoured
here’s Johnald: love the lesbians

prince yuta: lesbian leader, what do you want us to do

here’s Johnald: uh
here’s Johnald: commit equality, love everyone, don’t fuck shit up

chittaphone: i think u meant ”fuck shit up”

here’s Johnald: no
here’s Johnald: follow laws
here’s Johnald: don’t do illegal things, be nice, smile, talk to people, be a person

chittaphone: sounds boring
chittaphone: renjun you should take johnny’s position as the lesbian leader
chittaphone: i get that ur the jr. lesbian but i think u’d do great in that position
chittaphone: think about it ;)
chittaphone: i could be ur senior advisor

demon rainbow: interesting offer

here’s Johnald: hey i’m nice
here’s Johnald: don’t be like that

chittaphone: fake

here’s Johnald: :(

chittaphone: fine ur great
chittaphone: now stop being :(
chittaphone: be c: instead

here’s Johnald: c:
here’s Johnald: who else is a lesbian

junguwu: i’d say i’m a solid lesbian
junguwu: like, y’know, at least a bit

chittaphone: you definitely are, i agree
chittaphone: xuxi too
chittaphone: xuxi’s like… an honorary lesbian

junguwu: i agree
junguwu: also kun is on some level a lesbian
junguwu: and doyoung
junguwu: doyoung’s a huge lesbian

rabbit(ch): i was mentioned?
rabbit(ch): oh yeah, i am
rabbit(ch): lesbian rights!
rabbit(ch): lesbians are so right in their life choices, men ain’t shit

chittaphone: i can’t believe i’m saying this but doyoung’s right
chittaphone: except jungwoo, kun, and xuxi
chittaphone: they’re all lovely

rabbit(ch): yeah i can agree to that
rabbit(ch): kun’s a bitch sometimes though

cool dad: say that to my face

rabbit(ch): ur a bitch sometimes

cool dad: that’s fair, you too
cool dad: but hey, ten said i was lovely, that’s all that matters uwu

rabbit(ch): ten is often Very Wrong in things they say, though
rabbit(ch): bc they’re a bitch too

chittaphone: everyone’s a bitch to you
chittaphone: you act like ur not a bitch

rabbit(ch): i’m the biggest bitch
rabbit(ch): and not everyone, jungwoo’s lovely and i love him, he’s very far from being a bitch

chittaphone: ...jungwoo, do you think ur boyfriend even knows you
chittaphone: because I Know ur a bitch in the best sense of the word

junguwu: shh let him believe what he believes
junguwu: i’m running an experiment on how long it takes for him to admit that i’m a bitch
junguwu: xuxi still hasn’t done it

chittaphone: that’s because xuxi is lovely and would never call anyone a bitch
chittaphone: xuxi is better than anyone here

junguwu: i agree
junguwu: xuxi is the best boy and there can be no objections

chittaphone: anyone who disagrees can and will face my wrath
chittaphone: i’m not scared of snapping someone’s mf bones

rabbit(ch): jungwoo i’m never gonna call you a bitch
rabbit(ch): ur lovely
rabbit(ch): any person that is lucky enough to date you would never call you a bitch

junguwu: huh
junguwu: we’ll see about that

Chapter Text

[group chat ’jaehyun’s boyfies’]
[7:17 pm]

Milky Boy: guys :c

cool dad: oh no what’s wrong
cool dad: did you listen to serendipity and now ur sad again?

Milky Boy: no :c
Milky Boy: i listened to serendipity five times in a row and now i’m sad again

cool dad: why do you do this to yourself
cool dad: i’m omw with some chocolate and red velvet’s album

Milky Boy: thank u :c
Milky Boy: @actual angel @here’s Johnald come over

here’s Johnald: hello this is ten uwu
here’s Johnald: can i join
here’s Johnald: i won’t take up much space and i’m already clinging onto johnny so it makes no difference

Milky Boy: the more the merrier uwu
Milky Boy: ur, like, tiny, so space isn’t a problem

here’s Johnald: i’ll have you know i’m over average in thailand
here’s Johnald: so fuck u >:( don’t bully me

actual angel: hey i can’t come i’m sorry :(
actual angel: doyoung, mark and i are all watching a movie together
actual angel: but i can be with u here and spiritually uwu

here’s Johnald: i love u
here’s Johnald: have fun uwu

actual angel: i love u more
actual angel: ur a blessing, love

cool dad: he rly is
cool dad: an actual sunshine

here’s Johnald: ur so right
here’s Johnald: jaehyun’s the best :( his eyes sparkle :((
here’s Johnald: this is johnny btw, i got my phone back

Milky Boy: stop :(( i can’t handle this
Milky Boy: did u know that i love u all

here’s Johnald: ten told to me to tell u that ur their type and that they’re picky so it’s a compliment
here’s Johnald: and that they know you love them

Milky Boy: pls someone get here faster i want hug
Milky Boy: my pillow isn’t humanlike enough
Milky Boy: emergency cancelled, kun’s here uwu
Milky Boy: but that doesn’t mean that u @here’s Johnald and ten shouldn’t hurry
Milky Boy: i want to be cuddled from all my sides :(

actual angel: y’all you better hug him well
actual angel: or i will be legally obligated to sue and none of you want that

here’s Johnald: direct quote from ten ”i give the best hugs so shut the fuck up taeyong”
here’s Johnald: i tried to tell them to tone it down but they wanted me to say that exactly like that

actual angel: that’s completely fair, they’re right
actual angel: they do give rly good hugs and cuddles i cannot deny that

Milky Boy: i don’t think i’ve ever actually cuddled with ten
Milky Boy: new experiences owo
Milky Boy: oh no serendipity’s playing again i’m sad

actual angel: CHANGE THE SONG

Milky Boy: but it’s so beautiful :((
Milky Boy: jimin’s voice is just so :(((
Milky Boy: IT’S THE EXTENDED VERSION I’M CRY

actual angel: kun pls change the song

cool dad: i cannot
cool dad: jaehyun’s completely right, jimin’s voice is really just so :((( i cannot change it
cool dad: i’m entranced
cool dad: nevermind ten and johnny just came in and ten immediately shut off music and crawled onto jaehyun so now they’re lying on top of jaehyun
cool dad: jaehyun’s having all his sides cuddled bc johnny’s on his other side now

actual angel: it’s what he deserves
actual angel: anyway i gtg, the movie’s playing and i haven’t been paying attention

Milky Boy: bye!! have fun!!

Chapter Text

[group chat ’all the family’]
[1:47 pm]

jong jinrak: hey y’all
jong jinrak: i started thinking

tall baby: oh no that never says anything good

jong jinrak: wow fuck you too then
jong jinrak: but uh yeah, i was thinking about the future and what it’d be like in 100 years n stuff but i realized that i’m not even gonna be alive then
jong jinrak: so i started thinking about nearer future and what i’d like go achieve n stuff
jong jinrak: and i was wondering, what will you guys do in the future, where do you see yourself

tall baby: that’s too deep for 1 pm
tall baby: but damn that’s a good question
tall baby: i guess life as an idol rly restricts us of doing much
tall baby: but when i’m old and don’t work with sm anymore, i’d like to go to another country and ***** you

jong jinrak: um decode that right now

tall baby: nope

demon rainbow: he meant marry you

tall baby: YOU DON’T KNOW THAT
tall baby: YOU HAVE NO PROOF

demon rainbow: ur reaction is my proof, thank you very much
demon rainbow: but anyway, to answer your question, i’d just want to get a big as fuck apartment and live with all my boyfriends
demon rainbow: and then just rest and not have to work for the rest of my life

nono: sry that isn’t happening because i’m making you travel around the world with me
nono: i want to travel for fun when i stop being an idol
nono: visit the world’s gayest places

nana: visit my bedroom ;)
nana: i don’t mean that jn an innuendo kind of way, btw
nana: i literally have gay, bisexual, and agender flags hanging on my wall
nana: i hope to just go to as many prides as i can and not give a fuck

rainbow demon: i want to grow up to be a gamer grandpa that everyone wants to be friends with
rainbow demon: omg friendly famous gay gamer grandpa

country boy: i want to be the friendly famous gay gamer grandpa’s boyfriend

rainbow demon: you already are, bitch, what else
rainbow demon: answer the child’s question

jong jinrak: hey i’m not that small :(

country boy: uh i guess i’d like to just live a peaceful life then
country boy: spend as much time with my boyfies and datemate as i can

loselose: i plan to kill yuta in his sleep tonight
loselose: wait was i supposed to tell about further future plans?
loselose: in that case, i’m decapitating taeil tomorrow

prince yuta: what have we ever done to you
prince yuta: we’re nice :(
prince yuta: i plan on loving sicheng until the day i die and then some
prince yuta: i hope sicheng finally realizes he loves us by the time we’re 55

moonmoon: that’d be the dream
moonmoon: we should get a house in osaka and live there together
moonmoon: or maybe in a different country bc yuta knows japanese and we don’t
moonmoon: thailand bc none of us know thai so none of us would get any extra help!

prince yuta: bold of you to assume i’m literate
prince yuta: if you didn’t know yet, i can barely utter a word in korean, and you expect me to have a whole vocabulary in japanese? i have to laugh

cool dad: that’s a rly good question, chenle
cool dad: i guess i’d stay in korea
cool dad: unless politics get in the way of things
cool dad: but, y’know, my dream would be to have all my boyfriends as close to me as possible and that’s it

:D : everyone’s answers are so cute :((
:D : i agree with kun
:D : i hope we all just stay together
:D : my plan is to make all of u smile at least once a day

junguwu: your plan is going smoothly already
junguwu: i haven’t seen a person that doesn’t smile after spending time with you
junguwu: anyway, as for me
junguwu: i hope to leave something memorable behind me so i want to work up to that
junguwu: and i want to live until i can see a world without hatred in it
junguwu: that’s pretty unreal, i guess

rabbit(ch): it’s getting better already, woo
rabbit(ch): maybe we won’t experience it in our lifetimes but the hatred will disappear
rabbit(ch): don’t let yourself think otherwise

junguwu: i love you
junguwu: anyway, answer the question

rabbit(ch): hmm
rabbit(ch): maybe i could finish a university
rabbit(ch): or open a bakery, that’d be cute

actual angel: i’d work in the bakery with u
actual angel: i hope to live with you guys, still
actual angel: i don’t think i could survive without you
actual angel: i’m so used to you being around me that if ur away, it feels wrong

Milky Boy: i hope i can finally get some milk :(
Milky Boy: when i finally get that milk and have enough calcium in my body, i’d love to keep healthy and exercise
Milky Boy: and if my hands don’t shake, it’d be great to play the piano

here’s Johnald: i’ll hold your hands so they don’t shake uwu
here’s Johnald: i’d like to go back to america, marry one of my boyfriends or my datemate and adopt a kid or three
here’s Johnald: and then go back to korea and live with everyone and have a big happy family

chittaphone: i just want silence and calm
chittaphone: we’ll see where life takes us, i don’t like thinking ahead, it scares me
chittaphone: makes me think of my own mortality and that’s some deep shit unfortunately

actual angel: don’t even start, i remember we talked about that and i’m still scarred for life
actual angel: chenle, you didn’t tell us what you were going to do in the future

jong jinrak: everyone has these deep and emotional answers but i’m just planning to outlive every single one of you

tall baby: you should buy sm

jong jinrak: i’ll think about it

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[3:26 pm]

chittaphone: do you ever get just really aware of your own mortality
chittaphone: like
chittaphone: we’re all gonna die at some point
chittaphone: every single one of us
chittaphone: and no one knows why and when

junguwu: it’s 3 pm
junguwu: don’t we usually talk about this at 3 am

chittaphone: blame chenle
chittaphone: he made me think of this again
chittaphone: don’t like that
chittaphone: but imagine how many things there are going to be left unsaid when we die
chittaphone: because we don’t know when we’ll die so we can’t rly say everything to each other in time

junguwu: i hate that you’re right
junguwu: yet it’s so hard to say everything, isn’t it? even if you know that you shouldn’t keep important things in, you can’t say them out loud to the person who should know it
junguwu: and then you start thinking that things are maybe better left unsaid

chittaphone: and yet they’re not
chittaphone: as much as you want to keep things in, they keep eating you from the inside until you can’t anymore

junguwu: if we stopped being cryptic and deep, i’d say that the moment i felt like i couldn’t anymore is when i started dating yukhei
junguwu: i had that stuck in me for so long that one day it just came out
junguwu: so things unsaid don’t always stay as things unsaid

chittaphone: i started dating yukhei because i couldn’t keep the thing unsaid as a thing unsaid
chittaphone: ”dating”
chittaphone: in my case… i probably shouldn’t have told him
chittaphone: one of us is going to get hurt by this and i don’t mind it being me but if it’s xuxi…
chittaphone: that’s why i value things that are unsaid

junguwu: both you and xuxi are adults, ten
junguwu: he knows what he’s agreed to
junguwu: and you know what you’ve agreed to
junguwu: no one is responsible for the other getting hurt because you warned xuxi before you two started… dating? having a thing? how should i call it

chittaphone: it’s dating on all levels except for the label
chittaphone: i feel like the label thing affects xuxi more than me
chittaphone: because no matter the label, this is still… dating
chittaphone: even if i don’t want the label, i know it’s dating
chittaphone: but i can see that xuxi needs the label
chittaphone: and it shouldn’t really matter, i’ve gone through this before so many times already and in the end i’m happy, the start phase is just hard
chittaphone: but at the same time… i’m scared of it, y’know?

junguwu: don’t rush
junguwu: i know xuxi
junguwu: he’ll wait for you for an eternity and then some, he loves you
junguwu: and he’d want you to be happy
junguwu: what’s the point of dating if you’re scared of the relationship?

chittaphone: what’s the point of waiting for someone until they decide they can be in a relationship with you if you’re not happy during that time?
chittaphone: two sides to the story

junguwu: stay on your side, ten
junguwu: let me be the judge of this, yeah?

chittaphone: i trust you

[4:31 pm]

chittaphone: y’know, I was about to text my old phone again
chittaphone: but you told me to talk to you instead and i promised
chittaphone: and if you say that things are better said, then i’ll say it

junguwu: hm?

chittaphone: i love you
chittaphone: non-platonically

junguwu: oh

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[6:52 pm]

junguwu: xuxi i fucked up

:D : oh no what’s wrong??
:D : are you okay?

junguwu: yeah dw
junguwu: but uh
junguwu: ten confessed to me
junguwu: my initial response was ”oh”
junguwu: and then my phone turned off and i only got it on now
junguwu: i replied to them like two hours ago
junguwu: with that one single ”oh”
junguwu: what do i DO

:D : woah okay lots of information
:D : uh, do you like them back

junguwu: yeah

:D : great
:D : so just explain what happened
:D : it’s ten, they’ll understand
:D : it’s not your fault that your phone decided to do that

junguwu: hnng okay
junguwu: wish me luck

:D : you don’t need it

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[7:02 pm]

junguwu: hey

chittaphone: hm?

junguwu: i’m sorry my phone turned off and it only turned back on just now
junguwu: i didn’t mean to just say ’oh’ and leave

chittaphone: yeah i assumed
chittaphone: you don’t rly seem like the person to do that

junguwu: i presume you were waiting for a response
junguwu: so… thing is
junguwu: i’m sorry but I don’t return those feelings

chittaphone: that was like the worst cliffhanger ever
chittaphone: if we were in a drama, the general public would be disappointed
chittaphone: all this waiting for this

junguwu: i
junguwu: i do hope, though, that it’ll eventually get easier, dealing with your ”start phase”, love

chittaphone: if i knew you were gonna start being sappy, i wouldn’t have said anything
chittaphone: it’ll be aight
chittaphone: and Please don’t let this affect our friendship
chittaphone: i rly didn’t expect u’d feel anything towards me, i just thought it’d be only fair for you to know
chittaphone: i don’t mind that you don’t return the feelings

junguwu: i’m sorry

chittaphone: that’s what we’re not gonna do
chittaphone: it’s not your fault you don't have feelings for me just as it is not my fault i do have feelings for you
chittaphone: and we don’t apologize for anything if we’re not at fault, understood?

junguwu: okay

 

[private chat with :D]
[7:15 pm]

junguwu: it’s done

:D : hm?
:D : so are you dating now or without labels or

junguwu: no

:D : what then

junguwu: i told them i didn’t like them
junguwu: so yeah, that’s why

:D : and why on earth did you do that
:D : you like ten and ten likes you what’s the problem

junguwu: it’s better for them that way

:D : you and ten are more similar than i thought before
:D : but how is that supposed to be better for them

junguwu: they struggle with their relationships at start anyway
junguwu: i wouldn’t want them to have to go through that again

:D : so basically what you’re saying is that i should break up with ten rn so they wouldn’t have to go through that start stage

junguwu: no that’s not what i meant
junguwu: ten loves you, don’t do tjat

:D : exactly
:D : they love you, too
:D : why do you sabotage your own self

junguwu: it’s okay, i don’t mind
junguwu: i can’t backtrack now anyway
junguwu: we’ll both get over it sooner or later

Chapter Text

[private chat with loselose]
[8:07 pm]

chittaphone: sicheng get ur ass here

loselose: my ass is reserved for yuta, taeil, and kun only, sorry
loselose: taeyong’s a twink, he’ll gladly help you out, no?

chittaphone: i hate you

loselose: thanks the feeling’s mutual
loselose: anyway what did u want

chittaphone: my bad karma has gotten back at me
chittaphone: wanna go out

loselose: are you asking me on a date
loselose: or are you offering to kill me

chittaphone: either is fine
chittaphone: no but fr let’s go somewhere
chittaphone: like, a cafe or a bar or the cinema or smth

loselose: i’d rather you kill me if you offered that but okay ig
loselose: when and where

chittaphone: later today?
chittaphone: we can plan it out when we see each other

loselose: aight sounds good
loselose: lastly
loselose: wdym by bad karma and how has it gotten back at you

chittaphone: remember u confessed to me and i rejected you
chittaphone: that was my bad karma

loselose: i wouldn’t really call it a rejection
loselose: rejection sounds bad, u were nice to me

chittaphone: well uh
chittaphone: yeah, i told jungwoo i loved him and he said he didn’t return the feelings
chittaphone: so it got back at me

loselose: oh no :((
loselose: did he at least put it nicely n all

chittaphone: sicheng
chittaphone: it's jungwoo
chittaphone: of course he put it nicely
chittaphone: he even apologized to me

loselose: you apologized to me too
loselose: multiple times
loselose: i had to threaten you so you'd shut up

chittaphone: you've got a point
chittaphone: still, it's different, you're you and i'm me

loselose: what's that supposed to mean

chittaphone: ur nice
chittaphone: i mean, you're a bitch but, like, a nice one
chittaphone: so you didn't deserve to be let down at all
chittaphone: even less without an apology
chittaphone: plus ur more sensitive about these things than me
chittaphone: meanwhile i'm just a bitch, not even a nice one
chittaphone: and the feeling things don't really bother me that much unless i'm just starting to date someone

loselose: if it was not for the laws of this land, i would've slaughtered you by now
loselose: tell me this - do you ever think before you speak? is that, like, a thing you sometimes do?

chittaphone: no
chittaphone: i thought that'd be obvious

loselose: okay fair enough, big mood
loselose: i KNOW ur sensitive as well
loselose: and we're both nice bitches, you fuck

chittaphone: i love the term of endearment you've picked for me, i'd say it suits me very well
chittaphone: and i'm not that sensitive
chittaphone: not that sensitive about feelings
chittaphone: i can agree that i'm sensitive about other things

loselose: yeah i'm gonna have to keep disagreeing with you there but sure
loselose: think whatever makes you happy uwu

chittaphone: what's a "happy"

loselose: can you not try to be edgy in this minecraft server
loselose: we're a nice christian minecraft community, don't corrupt it

chittaphone: KSJSKD
chittaphone: god, i love you

loselose: are you saying that you love god
loselose: or are you saying you love me and using 'god' as an expression
loselose: or are you referring to me as god

chittaphone: yes

loselose: fair enough

Chapter Text

[private chat with loselose]
[2:58 am]

chittaphone: thank u for tonight
chittaphone: i’m definitely going to have a hangover in the morning
chittaphone: but it was fun

loselose: i didn’t say anything the first three times but this is literally the fourth time you’re saying this to me
loselose: but, to be fair, you should be thankful that someone like me paid attention to you, i agree

chittaphone: shut the heck up
chittaphone: ur special but not THAT special

loselose: so you finally admit it
loselose: this is why i like you when you’re drunk
loselose: you become so honest and truthful

chittaphone: ”this is why i like you”
chittaphone: end of sentence

loselose: bold of you to assume i still like you

chittaphone: for me not to assume…
chittaphone: do you?

loselose: we can talk when we’re both sober

chittaphone: wait what
chittaphone: why are you offline :(
chittaphone: come back :((
chittaphone: sichengie :((
chittaphone: i’m sorry :c

 

[group chat ’all the family’]
[3:17 am]

chittaphone: are any of y’all awake
chittaphone: i’m bored

demon rainbow: best medicine for boredom at 3 am is to go the fuck to sleep
demon rainbow: so i advise you to go have a shower and sleep

chittaphone: why the FUCK are you still awake
chittaphone: you’re like,,, 5
chittaphone: ur bedtime is 7 pm

demon rainbow: old hag

chittaphone: excuse me
chittaphone: i am a person of a delicate and respectable age

demon rainbow: aka an old hag
demon rainbow: which is why your bedtime is the same as mine

chittaphone: so, like, 4 am?

demon rainbow: sounds about right
demon rainbow: wait a minute hyuck is threatening to kill me

chittaphone: the romance of the 21st century
chittaphone: true love :’)

rainbow demon: i swear to god, if the both of you don't go to sleep, i’m snapping your necks precisely in half
rainbow demon: and then feeding you out to fish

chittaphone: i’ll sleep

rainbow demon: thank you
rainbow demon: goodnight

chittaphone: i didn’t say when but you’re welcome
chittaphone: renjun ur in immediate danger though so you should sleep

junguwu: why the fuck are any of you awake

rainbow demon: i woke up just now because of renjun
rainbow demon: i’m going to kick him out of bed
rainbow demon: *them
rainbow demon: i’m sorry

demon rainbow: it’s aight uwu
demon rainbow: i’m awake because,, i couldn’t sleep

chittaphone: i was out with sicheng and now i’m too lazy to shower so i can sleep
chittaphone: therefore i’m procrastinating until i fall asleep
chittaphone: why are YOU awake

junguwu: i woke up a few minutes ago
junguwu: had a nightmare again

chittaphone: oh no :(
chittaphone: do you want to talk about it?

junguwu: no thank you
junguwu: it’s silly

chittaphone: it’s not silly if you’re upset about it
chittaphone: but if you don’t want to talk, that’s okay

junguwu: dw it’ll be aight
junguwu: i’ll fall back asleep soon
junguwu: i’m just not used to sleep alone so often, i guess

chittaphone: >:(
chittaphone: i’m buying you one of those five feet tall teddy bears

junguwu: you’re a five feet tall teddy bear

chittaphone: hey i’m short but not THAT short
chittaphone: this is just straight up bullying at this point

junguwu: ”straight”
junguwu: also it’s not bullying
junguwu: ur just that short

chittaphone: I’M NOT
chittaphone: ur mean

junguwu: sure i am
junguwu: anyway, we should sleep
junguwu: goodnight, ten, i hope you sleep well

chittaphone: goodnight, you meanie, sweet dreams

Chapter Text

[private chat with loselose]
[9:35 am]

chittaphone: oh my god sicheng i’m so sorry
chittaphone: i shouldn’t have asked that
chittaphone: being drunk is a shit excuse but that’s the only thing i’ve got
chittaphone: please text me when you’re awake, i’m so sorry

[11:57 am]

loselose: it’s ok
loselose: i do still like you but that’s my problem
loselose: i shouldn’t have left you hanging like that yesterday

chittaphone: no!! it’s not your fault!!
chittaphone: i was a dick!!
chittaphone: you were completely right to do so
chittaphone: tell me if i can do anything for you
chittaphone: that sounds like bribing you
chittaphone: might as well

loselose: it’s okay, ten
loselose: just… let’s not talk about it again, okay?

chittaphone: okay
chittaphone: love you

 

[private chat with ’ten’s old phone’]
[12:03 pm]

chittaphone: what the fuck were you thinking
chittaphone: ”i have complete self-control when i’m drunk and don’t say dumb shit”
chittaphone: this is like the millionth time you’ve fucked up
chittaphone: if you could think with the one brain cell you’ve got fucking left, it’d be great
chittaphone: nvm you don’t even have to have brain cells to understand that it’s something you don’t fucking ask
chittaphone: it’s obvious he doesn’t like talking about it privately to you, you’ve brought that up one too many times irl already
chittaphone: when the fuck made drunk ten think otherwise
chittaphone: ah right, ”men ain’t shit”
chittaphone: that’s the category i’m in now
chittaphone: lmao i remember johnny said i shouldn’t misgender myself when i’m mad at myself to not feel even worse
chittaphone: HA
chittaphone: old habits die hard ig
chittaphone: i’ve pretty much plain old ignored everything johnny has told me not to do - drink, misgender myself, going to sleep late, texting this phone instead of him
chittaphone: how is he even putting up with me, what the fuck
chittaphone: but i can’t tell him what happened with sicheng either because that makes me a dick
chittaphone: i guess i am one lmao
chittaphone: how did sicheng even start liking me
chittaphone: /why/ did he

 

[private chat with here’s Johnald]
[12:27 pm]

chittaphone: i’m sorry

here’s Johnald: ??
here’s Johnald: is everything okay?

chittaphone: yeah, everything’s fine
chittaphone: i was just thinking and
chittaphone: i’m sorry that you have to put up with me when i’m like this
chittaphone: i’m sorry that i’m not going through with everything we’ve talked about
chittaphone: because i know, technically, that it’d help me and that i’d feel better if i just did what you said
chittaphone: i’m sorry i’m not doing that
chittaphone: you deserve so much better

here’s Johnald: ten…
here’s Johnald: it was my choice to date you
here’s Johnald: i know who i fell in love with
here’s Johnald: and i know who i still love no matter what
here’s Johnald: you’re the best i could ever ask for
here’s Johnald: i understand that it’s hard, don’t apologize for that
here’s Johnald: are you in your room, sweetheart?

chittaphone: yeah
chittaphone: wait don’t come over i look like a clown, i don’t want you to see me like this

here’s Johnald: i’ve seen you after crying
here’s Johnald: and i’ve seen you with makeup streaming down your face
here’s Johnald: and you’ve seen me crying, too
here’s Johnald: don’t hide from me

chittaphone: okay

Chapter Text

[private chat with moonmoon]
[4:37 pm]

loselose: where is yuta and why is he not answering his phone
loselose: where have you hidden him, what have you done

moonmoon: it’s she today
moonmoon: i’m painting her nails so she can’t check her phone

loselose: oh worm
loselose: i haven’t talked to her today yet so i didn’t know
loselose: are u in yuta’s or your room? i wanna see u both uwu

moonmoon: that’s peculiar
moonmoon: squints
moonmoon: you never want to see us

loselose: listen, there are some special days once in a while when i want to see u both
loselose: another opportunity might not present itself for a long time so u better tell me where you are

moonmoon: we’re in yuta’s room
moonmoon: yuta said she wanted you here bc she wants to come out to kun
moonmoon: and it’s be easier if you were here as well

loselose: owo okay i’ll be there in a few

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[5:23 pm]

prince yuta: hey, kun?
prince yuta: can we talk?

cool dad: of course
cool dad: do you want me to come over or to do it over text?

prince yuta: i think i’ll be able to actually word things better over text
prince yuta: if that’s okay with you

cool dad: of course, love
cool dad: what is it?

prince yuta: so, i’m not too sure of how to say it properly, but i’m genderfluid?
prince yuta: sicheng and taeil already know and i thought it’d be only fair if you did, too
prince yuta: so, um, yeah
prince yuta: that

cool dad: i’m glad you told me
cool dad: do you mind elaborating on it? or should i google about it?

prince yuta: you can ask whatever you have to!!
prince yuta: short version of it is that on some days i feel like a guy, on some i feel nb/agender, and on some i feel like a girl
prince yuta: e.g., rn i feel more Girl than a guy or nb

cool dad: so, for now, you’re going by she/her?
cool dad: and when you feel differently, you’re gonna go by different pronouns?

prince yuta: yep!
prince yuta: exactly!!

cool dad: how often does it change?
cool dad: like, your gender expression

prince yuta: it’s very random tbh
prince yuta: i just went through a long time of feeling like guy
prince yuta: and now i feel like a girl
prince yuta: though most of the time i go by they/them with sicheng and taeil

cool dad: ah, okay
cool dad: thank you for telling me
cool dad: i love you

prince yuta: i love you too
prince yuta: don’t tell anyone, though
prince yuta: i don’t think… they’d understand and i don’t want to risk testing it

cool dad: of course, sweetheart
cool dad: but you shouldn’t be worried about that
cool dad: we all love you just the way you are, your gender expression would be pretty much the last thing changing anyone’s mind about that
cool dad: but i understand and i’m not telling anyone, don’t worry

prince yuta: i think i just need some time to get ready for it
prince yuta: i’ll do it sometime soon

cool dad: okay, baby
cool dad: can i come over?

prince yuta: i’d be happy if you did!!
prince yuta: i’m in my room
prince yuta: sicheng and taeil are here, too
prince yuta: if you want, we could paint your nails as well

cool dad: that sounds perfect
cool dad: do you have anything sparkly?

prince yuta: oh ten borrowed the only sparkly one i had left the other day
prince yuta: but i think i know what i want to do with your nails hehe

cool dad: should i be scared?

prince yuta: i’m experienced AND lovely
prince yuta: you have nothing to be scared of uwu

cool dad: i’ll trust u

Chapter Text

[private chat with nana]
[10:29 am]

jong jinrak: henlo
jong jinrak: i need ur professional help on gay matters

nana: since when are fetuses allowed to have phones
nana: wait, u said gay matters, i’m listening

jong jinrak: hmph >:(
jong jinrak: ur like the master of confident gays
jong jinrak: you, ten, and jungwoo, i mean
jong jinrak: but ur the most approachable uwu
jong jinrak: so
jong jinrak: i need your help on getting jisung to be as panicked as possible
jong jinrak: panicked gay, i mean

nana: ooh i’m interested
nana: so we’re planning a date
nana: and i’m giving you some pickup lines to use on him

jong jinrak: would a date and some pickup lines be enough, though?
jong jinrak: ok nvm he’s a 5’10 walking disaster who panics every time i open my mouth

nana: ur also giving him some special gifts uwu
nana: and ordering a special dessert
nana: wait no let’s start from the beginning
nana: get yourself a date and book a table at a cute cafe

jong jinrak: should i write this down

nana: yes obviously
nana: call in advance to also order a special dessert
nana: like… his favourite cake and on it with uh strawberry or chocolate sauce have something written
nana: like, ”prettyboy” or something likewise

jong jinrak: should one word be in one sauce and the other in another?

nana: no, have it written as one word
nana: match the colours, if it’s a chocolate cake - use strawberry sauce, if it’s red/pink-ish cake, use chocolate sauce n yeah
nana: omg get him a promise ring
nana: that’d be so cute, my mind
nana: if you don’t want a ring, get him a cute bracelet that he could wear and get yourself a matching one as well
nana: during the date tell him So Many Compliments
nana: make the boy blush

jong jinrak: ”you’re so tall, i can barely see your head” uwu
jong jinrak: ”you look like a lamp post”
jong jinrak: ”ur younger than me, loser”
jong jinrak: how’s that

nana: we’ll work on the compliments
nana: that file seems to lag in ur brain

jong jinrak: shouldn’t i say true things?

nana: no not necessarily
nana: i tell jeno he’s the best big spoon ever even if he’s not bc i love him
nana: (the best big spoon has been and always will be renjun)
nana: he tells me i’m the best little spoon even if that’s not true
nana: (the best little spoon has been and always will be xuxi)
nana: white lies!

jong jinrak: ”your face isn’t all that bad”

nana: you’re on the right track
nana: i believe in you

jong jinrak: thank u
jong jinrak: your support means the world to me

nana: always, child

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[10:47 am]

jong jinrak: [multiple screenshots attached]
jong jinrak: this is what he described as a date i could fluster jisung in
jong jinrak: shoot your shot
jong jinrak: be the first to make The Na Jaemin be flustered

rainbow demon: thank you, ur an angel
rainbow demon: i’m definitely getting a picture of his blushing cheeks

Chapter Text

[group chat ’mission panicked jaemin’]
[11:03 am]

rainbow demon: y’all
rainbow demon: i tried to book a table and they wanted me to pay for it
rainbow demon: and my card got declined

demon rainbow: you should’ve explained to them that ur a celebrity
demon rainbow: they would’ve let u book it without paying in advance then

rainbow demon: ah yes
rainbow demon: give dispatch/koreaboo/allkpop a good article about how Boy Band’s Nct Dream And Nct 127 Members Don’t Get Paid At All Because They Can’t Afford To Book A 7000 Won Table
rainbow demon: no thx

demon rainbow: okay you’ve got a point
demon rainbow: should i go book it instead

nono: we could do it here in the dorms
nono: it’d be more personal, too
nono: and if jaemin and hyuck start kissing in public, that’d make them get good articles too
nono: Has Fanservice Gone Too Far? Shocking!!! Jaemin And Haechan Caught Kissing For Fans, Sm Forcing Them To Do So??

demon rainbow: i hate that they could actually release and article like that and i wouldn’t even be that surprised
demon rainbow: a) bc it’d be hyuck and nana and they have no self control, b) but also dispatch,,,, allkpop,,,,,,,,, koreaboo,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, the worst

rainbow demon: hey i’ve got a ton of self control

demon rainbow: and my name’s stacey
demon rainbow: we all know you well enough to say for sure that u’ve got No self control At All

rainbow demon: you’re mean

demon rainbow: thanks i’m aware
demon rainbow: anyway so we’re doing it in the dorms?

rainbow demon: i think that’d be good

country boy: i’m all for it

demon rainbow: alright
demon rainbow: so we should make the food ourselves
demon rainbow: i’ll ask kun if he can teach us how to bake a cake

rainbow demon: ooh nice
rainbow demon: let’s get this sweet bready not bread thing!

demon rainbow: i’m breaking up with you

rainbow demon: no you’re not

demon rainbow: well i can’t argue with that i guess
demon rainbow: ok i’m gonna ask kun for cooking lessons uwu

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[12:38 am]

demon rainbow: dad

cool dad: are you calling out for me
cool dad: or are you reminding me that i have somehow fathered you

demon rainbow: yes

cool dad: valid
cool dad: you may proceed as you are, indeed, my favourite nb child

demon rainbow: aww ily
demon rainbow: WAIT I’M YOUR ONLY NB CHILD
demon rainbow: ily card revoked

cool dad: you still love me, though
cool dad: blood’s thicker than water

demon rainbow: i’m glad i’m adopted then

cool dad: shit you’ve got a point
cool dad: anyway, what’s up, what did u want

demon rainbow: we’re planning a date night
demon rainbow: in which we could make jaemin get what he deserves - make him a panicked gay for a change

cool dad: okay that sounds fair
cool dad: you’re informing me because…?

demon rainbow: you have to teach us how to make a cake
demon rainbow: and depending on what the cake’s gonna be like, also a sauce for it and how to decorate it appropriately etc

cool dad: okay, sounds good
cool dad: when?

demon rainbow: uhh send a list for groceries, jeno and i will go shop
demon rainbow: maybe in the evening?
demon rainbow: and then we can make the date night either tomorrow or the day after that and make a new cake for it uwu

cool dad: alrighty, i’ll send u the list in a few

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[2:45 pm]

actual angel: kun

cool dad: yes, my love

actual angel: why does it smell like the kitchen is burning?

cool dad: …
cool dad: no reason
cool dad: there is absolutely no problem

actual angel: uh huh
actual angel: so i shouldn’t bring a fire extinguisher

cool dad: i mean
cool dad: if you don’t have a problem with it
cool dad: please do
cool dad: but um there is absolutely no reason to

actual angel: kun

cool dad: yes, my love

actual angel: what the fuck are you doing
actual angel: i want the kitchen to be,,, Of Use

cool dad: it will be
cool dad: in a few days
cool dad: when it doesn’t smell like vanilla anymore

actual angel: kun
actual angel: why would it smell like vanilla for extended periods of time

cool dad: we had a problem with vanilla essence

actual angel: oh my god
actual angel: what was the problem

cool dad: ...wrong measurements
cool dad: a certain child thought that a teaspoon of vanilla essence wouldn’t be enough and didn’t ask me
cool dad: so they, uhm, added the whole bottle without telling me

actual angel: renjun’s getting murdered

cool dad: hey, don’t do that
cool dad: a) u’ll go to prison
cool dad: b) renjun’s lovely, they just lack brain cells sometimes

actual angel: they go into MY KITCHEN, make it smell UNBEARABLE and you expect me to not murder them
actual angel: it’s like you don’t know me

cool dad: but… please?

actual angel: sigh
actual angel: okay
actual angel: but i AM making them stand in the corner

cool dad: :c

actual angel: don’t
actual angel: don’t do that
actual angel: what are you making anyway

cool dad: the children are doing a date night
cool dad: so they’re learning how to bake

actual angel: oh okay that’s cute
actual angel: renjun’s not standing in the corner
actual angel: but i’m never giving them vanilla essence
actual angel: ever
actual angel: even when they’re 80

cool dad: that’s valid
cool dad: i’m not either

actual angel: i can and will break up with you if you ever give them vanilla essence

cool dad: i can accept that
cool dad: you should do just that

actual angel: i hope it doesn’t come to that, though

cool dad: i’m not letting it

actual angel: you better
actual angel: what are we doing about the kitchen though

cool dad: getting takeout?
cool dad: for uhh a few days

actual angel: on you and the dreamies
actual angel: i’m not paying

cool dad: sigh
cool dad: okay
cool dad: lmao donghyuck’s card got declined today so he said he is starving

actual angel: ,,,
actual angel: does he need to renew it

cool dad: wait i’ll ask
cool dad: he does
cool dad: how did he not notice that
cool dad: i’m wheezing

actual angel: don’t say that, it makes you sound old

cool dad: IT’S ENOUGH THAT YANGYANG MAKES ME SOUND LIKE I’M ANCIENT, DON’T START

actual angel: i mean
actual angel: if we all agree on that, maybe you should evaluate that statement
actual angel: age is nothing to be ashamed of

cool dad: you’re insufferable
cool dad: i’m going to hug you so hard

actual angel: i like ur approach to anger
actual angel: are you not fighting me bc ur afraid your joints will give out?

cool dad: i
cool dad: what did i do to deserve this disrespect

actual angel: hey it’s just the truth

cool dad: i am very not content with this

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[7:28 pm]

[chittaphone added tendery enthusiast]
[chittaphone added yang squared]
[chittaphone added eyebrow man]

tendery enthusiast: owo what’s this
tendery enthusiast: there are so many people here oh no

cool dad: oh i was meaning to add y’all here like yesterday but i forgot
cool dad: oh well, thanks ten

yang squared: don’t worry kun
yang squared: it happens to all of us when we get older

cool dad: i
cool dad: i cannot stand this blatant disrespect
cool dad: ten is the same age as me

yang squared: yeah, so?
yang squared: that doesn’t make you less of an old man

chittaphone: he’s got a point
chittaphone: listen, i can’t be an old man, given the fact that i’m not a man at all

cool dad: you can be an old person??
cool dad: i’m not even asking to not be called old anymore
cool dad: i’m just asking that you’re treated the same way

chittaphone: old person doesn’t have the same ring to it
chittaphone: let’s stay with just calling you an old man

yang squared: i second that

tendery enthusiast: what ten agrees to, i agree to uwu

junguwu: huh
junguwu: hello

tendery enthusiast: omg u must be jungwoo
tendery enthusiast: i’ve heard so much about u

junguwu: we’ve met

tendery enthusiast: very briefly though
tendery enthusiast: it doesn’t count

junguwu: wait what have you heard about me
junguwu: should i be scared

cool dad: jungwoo ur lovely

chittaphone: jungwoo ur lovely
chittaphone: omg our minds

tendery enthusiast: only the best!!
tendery enthusiast: i love u already

cool dad: jungwoo is impossible to not love
cool dad: next thing u know, ur suddenly dating uwu

chittaphone: you make him sound easy to get
chittaphone: i assure you, that’s not the case

junguwu: ten come over :(

chittaphone: i’d love to, but i’m going over to kunhang’s and he’s gonna teach me chinese
chittaphone: i have to try to work with my three-hundredths of a brain cell

junguwu: ur smart already tho
junguwu: u deserve some rest

chittaphone: i am resting
chittaphone: i like learning chinese so it’s not that bad
chittaphone: plus i have a good teacher uwu

junguwu: but :(

tendery enthusiast: jungwoo’s right!! ur smart!! u deserve some rest!!
tendery enthusiast: don’t overwork urself

chittaphone: do u not want to see me anymore :(

tendery enthusiast: hey no that’s absolutely the opposite of what i think
tendery enthusiast: don’t say that

junguwu: i’m always available to see u instead, ten uwu

chittaphone: what
chittaphone: is happening
chittaphone: u’ve never-
chittaphone: nvm i’m going over to kunhang’s today
chittaphone: we can hang out later, jungwoo
chittaphone: i had already planned to go to him before, sorry

junguwu: it’s alright.

chittaphone: anyway, i’m going, wait for me uwu

tendery enthusiast: always am, always will uwu <3

junguwu: that’s so… cheesy
junguwu: are you two dating or smth

tendery enthusiast: not yet ;)

chittaphone: jesus
chittaphone: no
chittaphone: not planning on it for the nearest month or two either

junguwu: so ur gonna date?

chittaphone: who knows
chittaphone: certainly not me

junguwu: well, it should be both of you
junguwu: not giving each other false hope n all that, understanding ur own feelings n stuff

chittaphone: i don’t think it really applies to me and you know that
chittaphone: my feelings are the last thing i understand

junguwu: you should probably get done with those and then make such statements, though

chittaphone: huh
chittaphone: okay then

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[7:49 pm]

cool dad: jungwoo

junguwu: don’t
junguwu: i know
junguwu: i was being a dick and a bitch at the same time, i’m aware

cool dad: okay, if you know that
cool dad: what are you going to do about it

junguwu: i’ll go over to their room as apologize
junguwu: later
junguwu: when they’re back and alone

cool dad: okay, good
cool dad: i assume you got jealous?

junguwu: no, why would i
junguwu: ten and i aren’t dating, i’m not jealous

cool dad: you can still be jealous if you aren’t dating
cool dad: you do like them after all

junguwu: what
junguwu: no i don’t

cool dad: jungwoo, please, it’s obvious
cool dad: you like ten and ten likes you

junguwu: did xuxi tell you that

cool dad: he didn’t
cool dad: there are just some things that are obvious

junguwu: okay yeah i do like them
junguwu: but i’m not jealous

cool dad: then why did you act like that

junguwu: i don’t know
junguwu: i’m just in a bad mood

cool dad: why?

junguwu: i don’t know
junguwu: i’ll feel better and then i’ll apologize to ten when they’re alone

cool dad: did you start being in a bad mood when kunhang was added and ten interacted with him

junguwu: shit
junguwu: i think i might be jealous

cool dad: okay at least we’ve gotten thus far
cool dad: have you thought about confessing to ten
cool dad: or is there something else already happening there? i didn’t really understand what ten meant by assuring that you’re not easy to get
cool dad: like, ur not but why would ten have to assure that

junguwu: yeah about that
junguwu: ten confessed to me and i lied that i don’t like them

cool dad: uh huh
cool dad: okay
cool dad: and why would you do that

junguwu: idk i thought it’d be better for ten, since they have trouble starting the relationship and i know that it’s v confusing for them and that they hate going through that
junguwu: so,, yeah

cool dad: i
cool dad: the start is pretty rough, yeah, but ten has said repeatedly that it’s worth going through if they’re sure at first
cool dad: you should tell them what you actually feel and that you lied
cool dad: the earlier you do it the better
cool dad: lies never lead to anything good, especially when they go on for long

junguwu: i’ll tell them soon
junguwu: i’ll think of how and then tell them

cool dad: okay, good
cool dad: tell me if u need any help, alright?

junguwu: okay
junguwu: thank you, i love you

cool dad: i love you too, sweetheart
cool dad: i’ve got to go now, the dreamies are crafting jaemin a gift and i’m scared they’ll actually sew themselves together somehow

junguwu: they’d be easier to find if they were all together
junguwu: maybe that’s not such a bad thing

cool dad: sounds tempting but no!!!
cool dad: they’re nice children!!!

junguwu: the only nice child there is jaemin, the rest of them are monsters

cool dad: hey no, don’t be mean
cool dad: donghyuck and renjun are mildly okay too

junguwu: donghyuck… okay
junguwu: renjun has climbed up from the depths of hell and that’s why i respect them but they are in no way a nice child
junguwu: anyway go, make sure they don’t get ahold of anything flammable
junguwu: ily good luck

cool dad: ilyt uwu thank u

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘mission panicked jaemin’]
[2:09 pm]

demon rainbow: donghyuck and i are taking a nap and then getting ready
demon rainbow: the cake looks delicious and we didn’t fuck it up, are y’all proud

nono: very
nono: mark and i will start making the food now
nono: if hyuck could wear those cute heels he got, it’d be great
nono: and if u wore that plaid skirt, not only jaemin would die but all of us would too

demon rainbow: i’ll see what i can do :)

nono: i’m scared but full of excitement
nono: remember to take the bracelets with u

demon rainbow: how could i ever forget about them
demon rainbow: anyway we’re gonna nap, we haven’t slept half of the night, g’day

nono: don’t oversleep tho

demon rainbow: we won’t

 

[private chat with nana]
[7:34 pm]

country boy: hey nana
country boy: can u come over

nana: yeah sure uwu
nana: am i getting cuddles out of it tho

country boy: all of the cuddles

nana: omw!

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[9:21 pm]

nana: i have failed you and the confident gay ways you tried to teach me
nana: i cried, blushed, and panicked on a date

junguwu: pathetic

nana: i’m sorry
nana: but i should be excused, there were four of them and all of them was complimenting me all the time, it was like a compliment a minute
nana: they made food themselves and it was only a tiny bit oversalted
nana: and then they brought out a cake?? which said ‘prettyboy’ on it???
nana: and they made it themselves????
nana: and they also got rly sweet champagne
nana: and then
nana: then they got me a bracelet
nana: but not just an ordinary bracelet but a) it was handmade??? b) they all had matching ones
nana: i couldn’t not cry
nana: and also!!!!! hyuck and renjun were wearing matching outfits!!!!!!!!!!!!! they were both in skirts and had heels and aaaaaaaaa!!!!!!

junguwu: hm
junguwu: okay, that’s valid
junguwu: tho i still deem it pathetic

nana: how can i redeem myself
nana: i swear i’m not a panicked gay

junguwu: ur gonna take them out one by one
junguwu: both on a date and in a revenge kind of style
junguwu: and make sure they’re flustered as all hell
junguwu: or you’ll forever be a panicked gay

nana: i’ll make sure to do that, okay
nana: u’ll be proud of me

junguwu: you better follow through on that plan

 

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[10:47 pm]

chittaphone: i need a bit of time y’all, love you

[chittaphone left]

 

[group chat ‘ten’s boyfies’]
[10:47 pm]
[chittaphone left]

 

[group chat ‘johnny’s boyfies’]
[10:47 pm]
[chittaphone left]

[group chat ‘kun’s boyfies’]
[10:48 pm]
[chittaphone left]

 

[group chat ‘taeyong’s boyfies’]
[10:48 pm]
[chittaphone left]

 

[group chat ‘xuxi’s boyfies and half a partner’]
[10:48 pm]
[chittaphone left]

 

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[11:03 pm]

junguwu: i… need some time, too

[junguwu left]

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[11:19 pm]

cool dad: what the fuck happened

junguwu: you should probably ask ten

cool dad: they won’t talk to me
cool dad: they said they needed time, so i’m not gonna get through to them for a few days
cool dad: so please tell me
cool dad: i want to make sure ten’s going to be alright, they tend to do stupid things

junguwu: i went over to apologize to them
junguwu: but kunhang was there, so i decided not to
junguwu: so i said i walked into the wrong room by accident and turned back
junguwu: but ten came after me and asked what was wrong and why i had acted like that
junguwu: but i wasn’t ready to have that conversation bc i got jealous again
junguwu: so i said that it was nothing and i just told the truth and was a dick again
junguwu: then they just went “oh” and left
junguwu: and that was that
junguwu: i know i was wrong
junguwu: but i don’t know where they are atm and i think they blocked me for the time being so i can’t apologize to them

cool dad: come over, you can explain yourself from my phone

junguwu: okay
junguwu: i’ll be right there

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[12:09 am]

cool dad: hi ten, it’s jungwoo. i’m really, really sorry for acting like that, you didn’t deserve it. i’m… not asking for you to forgive me but i really am sorry. the rest of this is just gonna be excuses, so you’re free not to read it but i’d appreciate it if you did.

the reason i acted like that was because i got jealous at you and kunhang which was just dumb of me. nvm, i should probably tell this from the start, as much of a start there is to it.

when you confessed to me, i lied. i said i didn’t have the same feelings as you did but i did and i still do. i shouldn’t have but i thought that it would be easier for you, since you have that hard start phase and skipping that would be better for you and your mental health and i do realize that it was wrong of me to do - i understood that the same evening, but i thought that i should just keep on pretending and that you’d get mad at me for it which would be completely fair. and then fast forward to when you added kunhang to the group - i had noticed how often you two hang out and i got jealous, when i had literally no right to do so, and i started acting like a dick to you bc of what i felt.

i was on my way to apologize to you today, actually, but i saw that you were with kunhang again and my plan totally failed and i made matters even worse

so yeah, that’s… my excuse. i’m so sorry for being like that, but you don’t have to forgive me for it.
cool dad: i love you

chittaphone: oh okay

cool dad: okay?

chittaphone: ya
chittaphone: goodnight for now, it’s late

cool dad: can we talk tomorrow then?

chittaphone: sure
chittaphone: i’m tired now so bye

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[8:51 am]

loselose: wake up bitch
loselose: we’re going out, i don’t care if you had anything planned

chittaphone: have mercy on me, i literally fell asleep at six

loselose: that sounds like a you problem
loselose: wear something pretty

chittaphone: i’m pretty in everything
chittaphone: be more specific

loselose: i’d say something snarky but ur right
loselose: ur unfortunately very pretty
loselose: idc what you wear but those fishnets were rly something

chittaphone: aye aye captain
chittaphone: do i have to get up now tho

loselose: either ur getting up now and we’re going out and seizing the day
loselose: or i’m coming to cuddle with u

chittaphone: come here, bitch

loselose: alright, be right there
loselose: don’t fall asleep until i’m there

chittaphone: i’m not promising anything

loselose: sigh, okay

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[9:13 am]

junguwu: hi ten
junguwu: could we talk later today

chittaphone: i’m hanging out with sicheng, sorry
chittaphone: maybe tomorrow

junguwu: oh okay
junguwu: well, whenever you’re free then

chittaphone: yeah aight

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[9:16 am]

cool dad: ten

chittaphone: did jungwoo already tell you that i wasn’t gonna talk to him today
chittaphone: that’s fast

cool dad: you should talk to him, sweetheart

chittaphone: we should all do things
chittaphone: i’ll talk to him, just not now

cool dad: promise?

chittaphone: it’s not like i have a choice
chittaphone: everyone’s gonna keep nagging until we talk either way and i don’t want that
chittaphone: so yeah, promise

cool dad: do you not want to talk to him?

chittaphone: what’s there to say
chittaphone: he apologized
chittaphone: i’m still mad
chittaphone: i’ll calm down
chittaphone: it’ll be fine as always and my feelings and emotions will go away
chittaphone: and jungwoo and i will be friends once again

cool dad: maybe you should talk before you calm down
cool dad: so you don’t have to suppress your emotions but you can actually tell him how you feel

chittaphone: i’d rather not

cool dad: you should, though
cool dad: you always keep everything in and that’s what makes you unstable at times

chittaphone: what makes me unstable is the fact that i’m depressed and have insomnia and an alcohol problem that i have to hide since i’m an idol
chittaphone: not snapping at a friend is the least of my problems

cool dad: and what makes you depressed is that you don’t tell anyone what you feel and let it build up until you can’t handle it anymore

chittaphone: if i tell jungwoo what i currently feel, i’m going to feel worse when i calm down because i will have offended a friend
chittaphone: so i doubt that’s a good thing

cool dad: then at least tell someone
cool dad: me, or someone else, don’t keep everything in

chittaphone: i’ll think about it
chittaphone: i’m still tired so i’m going to try to sleep a bit more

cool dad: okay, sleep well, sweetheart
cool dad: i love you

chittaphone: i love you, too

 

[private chat with loselose]
[9:29 pm]

chittaphone: do you mind if i rant to you?
chittaphone: kun said i should let it all out but i don’t want to tell it to him since he’s dating jungwoo and i don’t want to make kun have to, like, pick sides until we’re okay again

loselose: you can always rant to me
loselose: over text or are u gonna actually talk

chittaphone: over text, it’s easier to formulate thoughts that way

loselose: okay, go ahead

Chapter Text

[private chat with loselose]
[9:31 am]

chittaphone: so uhh ig u saw what jungwoo was like in the gc when i added kunhang and we were joking around
chittaphone: so that made me feel kinda iffy since, y’know, jungwoo usually isn’t like that even if he doesn’t like something
chittaphone: but i let it slide bc i thought that he might be in a bad mood or smth
chittaphone: but the other day jungwoo came in my room when i was with kunhang, though he left immediately bc he “walked into the wrong room”
chittaphone: i went out after him bc i hadn’t rly talked to him and i wanted to hug him n stuff but instead he said that i was leading kunhang on and that we shouldn’t hang out as much and that i should sort out my feelings first
chittaphone: and that honestly made me feel so shit
chittaphone: like, i know it’s unfair to xuxi that we aren’t in, like, an Actual relationship
chittaphone: and that it’s unfair that i let him down like that at first and it’s unfair to you and it’s unfair to pretty much everyone i’m dating
chittaphone: this is why i don’t rant to people, shit, uh i’ll finish and then we can talk about the unfair to you thing
chittaphone: so yeah, that, and it’s even worse because jungwoo knew how shitty i already felt about not being able to be entirely sure about feelings n stuff since we had gone over that
chittaphone: i can kind of get why he lied to me about not liking me and that’s fine i guess but in that case he had no right to tell me shit about feelings, y’know?
chittaphone: i could probably accept it if it wasn’t in the context of jealousy, i’m okay with talking about that and i’m ready to improve myself if there is actual constructive criticism about my character
chittaphone: but not in a way of “hey i’m jealous so i’m gonna act like a dick to you bc i don’t know how to deal with myself”
chittaphone: okay, i’m good

loselose: do you want advice, my thoughts, or to not mention it all that?

chittaphone: just… ignore it
chittaphone: i just had to get it out of my system, y’know

loselose: okay, love
loselose: so, uh, can i ask what you meant by the unfair to me thing?

chittaphone: right, that
chittaphone: i already forgot about it, sorry

loselose: it’s aight

chittaphone: yeah, it’s that my feelings are not really, y’know, steady?
chittaphone: so to avoid the leading on part and everything from that narrative, i rejected you that time
chittaphone: i’m still trying to figure out my feelings toward you, so i thought it’d be better to tell you no so in case i suddenly realise that it’s purely platonic, i wouldn’t have lied to you or given false hope
chittaphone: and currently my feelings are in an even bigger mess than before
chittaphone: so at noon i might think i do like you and after a few hours - i don’t
chittaphone: and i… don’t know if you wanted to hear this truth but it’s like this and i can’t do anything about it

loselose: that’s okay, thank you for telling me
loselose: i can’t say i understand bc i haven’t rly had that kind of experience with feelings so i doubt i could ever truly understand that, but i know it must be hard on you
loselose: i’m sorry ur feelings are like that, if i could beat them up i would

chittaphone: trust me, i’d too if i had the chance
chittaphone: i’m sorry to ruin the moment but i’m really really tired so could we cuddle and sleep for an hour or two

loselose: of course
loselose: sleep well

chittaphone: i love you

loselose: i love you too

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[11:23 am]

yang squared: where is dejun
yang squared: i miss him and if u don’t give him back to me in three minutes, i can and will fight

eyebrow man: kjdksd you could’ve texted me

yang squared: no
yang squared: i had to let everyone know i miss u and am willing to go ways to prove my love for you

nana: squints
nana: are you guys dating
nana: if so, you’re not allowed to be grosser than me and jeno, we’re the gross power couple

eyebrow man: uhh we’re dating in the non-romantic aspect of dating?
eyebrow man: i’m aro, so we’re queerplatonic partners

nana: ohhh that’s cool
nana: ur still not allowed to be grosser than jeno and me tho

yang squared: fight me
yang squared: we’ll be as gross as we wanna be

eyebrow man: yangyang pls i don’t want to be gross
eyebrow man: don’t do this

yang squared: i’m not letting anyone dictate any rules, dejun
yang squared: we’re our own people and We Have Rights

eyebrow man: i am so sorry for him, jaemin
eyebrow man: i’ll uhh deal with him
eyebrow man: yangyang if you leave this nice boy alone and come over, i’ll give you a kiss

yang squared: that’s just one thing though
yang squared: i’d have to do two (2) things for you to just give me one (1) kiss

eyebrow man: sigh
eyebrow man: i’ll give you two
eyebrow man: three if ur good uwu

yang squared: ON MY WAY
yang squared: we can continue this later, Na Jaemin

nana: i’m scared
nana: should i be scared

rainbow demon: nana, be nice, i like him
rainbow demon: yangyang ur exactly the force of chaos we need in the ‘00 line

cool dad: no
cool dad: yangyang, do NOT listen to donghyuck under any circumstances

eyebrow man: yangyang is currently getting smooched, so he cannot read the chat

cool dad: good
cool dad: donghyuck, do you even know how much gray hair i have because of that monster child
cool dad: don’t suggest combining your forces if you don’t want both me and taeyong to wake up to a heart attack someday

rainbow demon: we’re lovely uwu
rainbow demon: also we’d call for an ambulance immediately, don’t worry

cool dad: thanks, that really calms me

yang squared: YOU HAVE GRAY HAIR BECAUSE YOU’RE OLD
yang squared: OLD MAN

cool dad: DEJUN I THOUGHT HE WASN’T READING THE CHAT

eyebrow man: he wasn’t
eyebrow man: he has a superpower in which he always knows when it’s possible to call you old
eyebrow man: he can and will wake up at 3 am if his 6th sense tells him that you can be called old

yang squared: and would i be lying

cool dad: i
cool dad: what did i do in life to deserve such disrespect
cool dad: what have i ever done to you

yang squared: nothing, ur just old and i’m making you embrace the reality of life faster
yang squared: you should thank me

cool dad: is this bullying
cool dad: am i getting bullied right now

actual angel: kun may be old but he’s lovely, don’t do that to him

cool dad: YOU’RE OLDER THAN ME
cool dad: WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT

yang squared: kun don’t change the topic
yang squared: we’re talking about your age not taeyong’s
yang squared: taeyong’s just fine

cool dad: i cannot handle this
cool dad: i came here to have a good time but i’m honestly feeling so attacked right now

Chapter Text

[private chat with loselose]
[2:03 pm]

chittaphone: omg i slept for so long i’m so sorry
chittaphone: where are you

loselose: oh i only just left to get some lunch
loselose: i’m actually on my way back, i thought you’d still be asleep

chittaphone: you were here the whole time?

loselose: yeah
loselose: it was cute, you kept squeeze-hugging me all the time

chittaphone: thank you for staying
chittaphone: what did you want to do today?

loselose: honestly i didn’t have any plans
loselose: i just wanted to get you out so you could stop thinking about everything n stuff

chittaphone: oh worm
chittaphone: thank you, i love u

loselose: uwuwu
loselose: i was thinking

chittaphone: that’s a first

loselose: oh shut up
loselose: as i was saying
loselose: i was thinking and, uh, you can say no, of course, but you said you’re confused about your feelings towards me specifically, so would you like to go on a date
loselose: see how it is, no pressure, no expectations
loselose: you can say no, tho

chittaphone: i think that’s a great idea
chittaphone: when?

loselose: maybe we can spend the day on a date?

chittaphone: that’s perfect
chittaphone: ur gonna have to wait for a little then, though
chittaphone: i wanna look pretty for u

loselose: you’re pretty either way

chittaphone: oh yeah i know
chittaphone: i’m great
chittaphone: but i wanna be Extra pretty

loselose: that’s fair, alright
loselose: do you want me to come later or can i watch you get ready
loselose: the way you do ur makeup is really satisfying

chittaphone: oh? come here uwu

loselose: be right there hehe

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[4:42 pm]

:D : :(

cool dad: oh no who am i fighting
cool dad: what’s wrong

:D : i’m :( bc jungwoo and ten aren’t on good terms and they’re both my partners and hhhh
:D : how do you do this

cool dad: you just have to wait it out
cool dad: ten said they’ll talk to jungwoo soon, they just have to calm down
cool dad: do you want to come over, baby?
cool dad: we can cuddle and watch something so you can take your mind off it

:D : i’d love that :D
:D : i’ll be right there
:D : wait
:D : am i getting a kiss
:D : bc i rly want a kiss, especially from you

cool dad: all the kisses, just for you, you deserve all of them

:D : i’m basically there already
:D : mwah

cool dad: if i could spend my whole life kissing you, that’s exactly what i’d do
cool dad: mwah

:D : what a coincidence, me too!
:D : wait, important question
:D : do you want some chocolate

cool dad: ur sweet enough

:D : so i’m taking chocolate with me
:D : ur not gonna get anywhere with just making sure i’m panicked
:D : i bet an hour would go past and suddenly u’d wail about wanting something sweet

cool dad: you make a compelling point
cool dad: take some, yes

Chapter Text

[private chat with loselose]
[7:39 pm]

moonmoon: I SEE YOU AND TEN HOLDING HANDS
moonmoon: TELL ME EVERYTHING
moonmoon: YUTA’S HERE TOO
moonmoon: WHERE WERE YOU TWO WHAT DID YOU WHY ARE YOU HOLDING HANDS WHAT IS HAPPENING

loselose: oh christ
loselose: i’ll get ten to their room and then i’ll come to u

moonmoon: OKAY
moonmoon: WE’RE WAITING

 

[private chat with loselose]
[7:52 pm]

chittaphone: i had a great time
chittaphone: thank you for today
chittaphone: i loved it

loselose: i had a great time, too
loselose: do you want to go out again some time again?

chittaphone: i’d love that
chittaphone: let’s do it <3

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[3:27 am]

chittaphone: jungwoo
chittaphone: are you awake?

junguwu: yeah

chittaphone: do you want to talk now
chittaphone: or is it too late at the moment for that
chittaphone: i can’t sleep anyway

junguwu: i don’t think i can
junguwu: sorry
junguwu: i just woke up and i’m a bit shaken, so yeah, i’m sorry

chittaphone: oh, that’s okay
chittaphone: do you want to talk about it?

junguwu: oh no, it’s okay
junguwu: it’s just the usual, y’know
junguwu: we can talk about everything tomorrow

chittaphone: okay
chittaphone: do you want me to come over? we don’t have to talk, we can just cuddle so you can calm and sleep

junguwu: oh?
junguwu: okay
junguwu: if you don’t mind

chittaphone: i’ll be right there

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[7:29 am]

:D : UHHH KUN

cool dad: ??

:D : TEN AND JUNGWOO ARE CUDDLING??
:D : ARE THEY OKAY NOW??
:D : DID THEY TALK??
:D : THEY’RE ASLEEP AND CUDDLING???

cool dad: OH WORM??
cool dad: maybe they talked at night? they both have sleeping problems
cool dad: i’m glad they’re both sleeping at least
cool dad: i’ll text ten and they can reply when they’re awake

:D : i’m coming back to u uwu
:D : i don’t want to disturb them
:D : they look so cute :((
:D : omg kun

cool dad: what

:D : i’m so in love with them both
:D : they really
:D : woah
:D : I AM IN LOVE!!!!

cool dad: omg xuxi
cool dad: me too
cool dad: it’s what they deserve
cool dad: ten? amazing. jungwoo? lovely
cool dad: both of them together? superior concept, objectively speaking - the only concept ever

:D : yes :((
:D : oh no i’m so soft, i’m gonna cry
:D : they’re the best people ever, i adore them

cool dad: big f***ing mood
cool dad: they make me feel L*VE and EM*TIONS

:D : me too??
:D : THEIR POWER
:D : h*ck
:D : that should be illegal
:D : omg u know who else i love

cool dad: who

:D : you and hyuck uwuwuwu

cool dad: aaa stop i love u more
cool dad: ur the best boy ever, i love u

:D : no don’t do that
:D : don’t make me even softer than i already am
:D : or i can and will smooch you

cool dad: do it, coward
cool dad: can i get hugs at that

:D : all of the hugs

cool dad: h*ck yeah
cool dad: i fucking love u

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[7:40 am]

cool dad: hey
cool dad: xuxi accidentally walked in on you and jungwoo cuddling
cool dad: so, are you two okay now?

[1:23 pm]

chittaphone: hi
chittaphone: sorry for the late answer, i woke up like twenty minutes ago
chittaphone: i wanted to talk to jungwoo but he said that he had had a nightmare so he didn’t want to talk then
chittaphone: so i offered to cuddle him instead and that we could talk in the morning
chittaphone: we hadn’t talked when xuxi walked in on us
chittaphone: but we did just talk about everything, yeah

cool dad: i’m really happy for that
cool dad: even xuxi was upset about everything between you two being like a warzone

chittaphone: well, we’re okay now
chittaphone: so no more warzone

cool dad: are you two friends now or something… else?
cool dad: since you’ve got feelings for each other and all that

chittaphone: we decided to wait for a bit
chittaphone: it’d be better for both of us
chittaphone: jungwoo wants to deal with his jealousy problem
chittaphone: y’know, it’d be quite hard for him to date me if every time i saw kunhang, he’d go into Major Dick Mode (jungwoo’s words, not mine)
chittaphone: and jungwoo was right, i do need to sort my feelings out properly
chittaphone: so while jungwoo deals with jealousy, i’ll deal with my feelings
chittaphone: and then we can date if after that’s done we still want to
chittaphone: for now we’re staying as friends

cool dad: ah, okay
cool dad: i think that’s for the better
cool dad: i’m glad you’re being adults about this

chittaphone: like you said, we should talk about our feelings, right?

cool dad: exactly
cool dad: i’m glad you’re doing that, sweetheart

 

[private chat with tendery enthusiast]
[1:27 pm]

junguwu: hi
junguwu: our first actual interaction didn’t go as well as planned
junguwu: and i’m sorry for that
junguwu: ten and i talked and we’re okay now
junguwu: and i thought i should apologize to you, too
junguwu: since this all also, y’know, involves you
junguwu: i promise i’m not going to act like that anymore

tendery enthusiast: if ten’s okay with it, i am too
tendery enthusiast: friends?

junguwu: friends! (*^o^*)

 

[private chat with :D]
[1:34 pm]

chittaphone: xuxi, baby

:D : yes?

chittaphone: jungwoo and i talked
chittaphone: and i know you were upset that we weren’t on the best terms
chittaphone: so do you want to come over and cuddle with us both for a bit and then get breakfast together?
chittaphone: or lunch, i suppose

:D : i’d love that
:D : i’ll be right there uwuwu

chittaphone: okie uwu

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[1:39 pm]

loselose: i’m booking an appointment with u tomorrow from 3 to 6

chittaphone: squints
chittaphone: appointment as in a date
chittaphone: or appointment as in just hanging out
chittaphone: or appointment as in you texted me instead of your dentist on accident

loselose: we’re going on a date, you uncultured swine

chittaphone: ur rude and mean but okay
chittaphone: can’t wait!

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[10:34 am]

junguwu: hi wanna go out?
junguwu: i miss u

chittaphone: oh sorry sicheng and i are going out on a date later today
chittaphone: we can go anywhere tomorrow though?

junguwu: oh yeah, okay!!
junguwu: can i come over and do your makeup though
junguwu: make you look all pretty for your date and stuff

chittaphone: i’m pretty either way but okay

junguwu: never said you aren’t
junguwu: you’re extremely pretty and everyone knows that
junguwu: objectively speaking, you’re the prettiest person on this planet

chittaphone: a whole you exists but go off i guess

junguwu: oh shut it
junguwu: anyway okay i’m gonna quickly eat and then come over to yours?

chittaphone: yea, okie uwuwu

 

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[10:52 am]

rainbow demon: @yang squared tell me about yourself
rainbow demon: this is an official interview in whether or not you can be accepted in the ‘00 line

yang squared: but i’m still born in 2000, an interview can’t change it

rainbow demon: That’s Only What You Think, Peasant
rainbow demon: let’s do the interview :)

yang squared: okay well i’m terrified now

cool dad: good
cool dad: if you’re terrified, you don’t want to unite with the 00 line
cool dad: don’t go against your instincts

yang squared: so, donghyuck what do you want to know

cool dad: sigh
cool dad: i’m trying to take care of the general welfare of this entire group, why are you like this

yang squared: don’t old people take naps or something to not be so cranky

cool dad: HEY
cool dad: pls stop i’m not old we’re only a few years apart

yang squared: sounds like something an old person in denial would say

rainbow demon: what are ur interests, how do you plan to overthrow the government, ur favourite colour
rainbow demon: only the usual

yang squared: right
yang squared: my interests are dejun uwu mwah @eyebrow man
yang squared: i’m overthrowing it by slowly making kun go into hulk mode and using him to fight it physically and then we can just rebuild it from scratch
yang squared: and it’s obviously pink, it’s the only valid colour

demon rainbow: disgusting
demon rainbow: the dejun thing
demon rainbow: keep your softness to yourself
demon rainbow: it’s enough with nana and jeno being,,,,,,, No
demon rainbow: i cannot deal with another one of them

eyebrow man: yangyang pls be appropriate
eyebrow man: don’t scare people

yang squared: i AM appropriate :(
yang squared: everyone should know that i love you and i’m just saying it so they are sure

eyebrow man: i-
eyebrow man: okay i cannot say anything to you i love you too, continue uwu

yang squared: hehe uwu

nana: hey renjun
nana: i’m gonna fight you
nana: with hugs and kisses
nana: jeno and i are lovely and if you try to argue with that, you’re so wrong
nana: we are gross but we’re also lovely and you know i’m right

demon rainbow: you’re wrong but it’s okay
demon rainbow: i know you lack brain cells so it must be hard to think

nana: that’s it, i’m coming over
nana: expect me because i can and will cuddle you to death

Chapter Text

[private chat with loselose]
[3:09 pm]

chittaphone: sicheng please talk to me
chittaphone: let me explain
chittaphone: it wasn’t my fault

loselose: it never is, right?
loselose: it was supposed to be our time but there you were, making out with jungwoo
loselose: who you’re apparently okay with now
loselose: thanks for definitely not forgetting to tell me that, i guess
loselose: let me be, ten
loselose: make out with whoever, you have your boyfriends but i was kind of expecting that to be our time

chittaphone: i’m sorry
chittaphone: oh you blocked me
chittaphone: well then
chittaphone: i suppose i’ll let you be then

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[3:17 pm]

junguwu: i’m sorry, ten
junguwu: i know that’s not enough
junguwu: but i can explain it to sicheng
junguwu: i shouldn’t have

chittaphone: don’t make the matters worse, jungwoo
chittaphone: just don’t do anything

junguwu: i’m sorry

 

[private chat with prince yuta]
[3:29 pm]

loselose: can i come over?
loselose: it’s okay if you’re busy, though

prince yuta: of course you can, love
prince yuta: is everything okay?
prince yuta: you usually never ask before coming

loselose: i’ll tell you about it when i get to you

prince yuta: wait, weren’t you supposed to go out with ten?
prince yuta: what happened?

loselose: long story short, i came a few minutes late and it seems like ten already found a replacement for me and was making out with jungwoo
loselose: so love that for me haha!

prince yuta: oh no, sweetheart
prince yuta: i can text taeil to come too?

loselose: please do
loselose: thank you, i love you

prince yuta: i love you too

 

[private chat with moonmoon]
[3:33 pm]

prince yuta: get ur ass over here
prince yuta: sicheng’s sad and we need to be here for him

moonmoon: omw
moonmoon: what happened?

prince yuta: [screenshot attached]

moonmoon: oh shit
moonmoon: that’s a dick move
moonmoon: i’ll be right there
moonmoon: i didn’t take ten for one to do that

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[3:34 pm]

cool dad: ten

chittaphone: no
chittaphone: leave me be
chittaphone: please do that for once, i need to be alone for a little bit and collect myself

cool dad: you’re always left to be and you end up not expressing yourself

chittaphone: good for me
chittaphone: just let me be, kun
chittaphone: i want to sleep and collect myself and talking to anyone won’t help me do either of those things, i know myself

cool dad: you need to talk, ten
cool dad: you and jungwoo, and sicheng all need to talk

chittaphone: why are you telling that to me
chittaphone: first of all, you already know my answer (in case you don’t, it’s “not now”), second of all, why is it always me that needs to initiate something or be willing to shit, correct me if i’m wrong but i’m pretty sure you have texted neither jungwoo nor sicheng about talking n all that

cool dad: you’re the only one not willing to talk
cool dad: it’s not that i’m picking on you, it’s just that you’re always the last one to accept the fact that you need to talk so i start with you

chittaphone: well i’ll be glad to let you know that sicheng isn’t willing to talk to me as he has blocked me
chittaphone: and i don’t want to talk to jungwoo, he’s done enough
chittaphone: let us deal with our problems ourselves, kun, we’ll be fine

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[4:12 pm]

tendery enthusiast: text me when u finish your date with sicheng
tendery enthusiast: tell me how it went uwu

chittaphone: we cancelled our plans

tendery enthusiast: oh?
tendery enthusiast: why

chittaphone: hhhhh long story short as jungwoo was leaving
chittaphone: he was helping me get ready
chittaphone: so yeah, as he was leaving, he thought it’d be a great idea to kiss me
chittaphone: and i automatically kissed back
chittaphone: ‘cause, y’know, i like him n all
chittaphone: but the same moment sicheng entered the room
chittaphone: and he wanted that to be our time, so he got upset over that
chittaphone: and that’s completely fair, i understand and i don’t blame him
chittaphone: so now he’s blocked me and he doesn’t want to talk to me, so i didn’t get to explain
chittaphone: and jungwoo and i aren’t on the best track again either
chittaphone: so i’m just sad and frustrated at the moment
chittaphone: but that’s what i always am, so it’s alright

tendery enthusiast: oh no :(
tendery enthusiast: do you want me to come over?
tendery enthusiast: i can message sicheng and explain everything to him for you if he’s blocked you
tendery enthusiast: y’know, how jungwoo kissed you and not the other way around?

chittaphone: thank you but no
chittaphone: it’s okay
chittaphone: i should explain to him that, not someone else
chittaphone: we can talk when he’s ready to, it’s probably better to not disturb him at the moment

tendery enthusiast: okay, if you’re sure
tendery enthusiast: do you want me to come over?

chittaphone: i think i’m gonna try to get some sleep

tendery enthusiast: it’s 4 pm

chittaphone: bold of you to assume time exists
chittaphone: i’m just tired

tendery enthusiast: oh no let’s not get deep into time again, that was horrible
tendery enthusiast: i couldn’t look at the clock for days
tendery enthusiast: i literally missed a dance practice because of you

chittaphone: don’t blame me for your dumbassery
chittaphone: should’ve put a reminder or an alarm

tendery enthusiast: but time doesn’t exist, what’s an alarm gonna do

chittaphone: i
chittaphone: stop that
chittaphone: ur gonna blame me for missing practices again
chittaphone: let’s not talk about time

tendery enthusiast: because it doesn’t exist?

chittaphone: STOP THAT
chittaphone: time exists, it’s definitely not a social construct
chittaphone: just shut up

tendery enthusiast: i have to keep talking just out of spite now
tendery enthusiast: i thought you knew better than this
tendery enthusiast: do you think the moon landing was faked
tendery enthusiast: i will bring out all my conspiracy theories

chittaphone: i will make sure you die of asphyxiation in your sleep

tendery enthusiast: is that supposed to make me scared
tendery enthusiast: because it did
tendery enthusiast: please don’t murder me

chittaphone: i’ll think about it

tendery enthusiast: i’m too young to die
tendery enthusiast: i still need to have so much more time to annoy kun

chittaphone: poor kun
chittaphone: you’ve convinced me with that
chittaphone: also… thank you
chittaphone: talking to you made me feel better

tendery enthusiast: always at your service

chittaphone: oh shut up ksdjsk
chittaphone: anyway, i’m gonna nap now, i love you

tendery enthusiast: i love you too
tendery enthusiast: sleep well

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[8:23 pm]

:D : hii
:D : now that you and ten are okay again, do you think we could all go out

junguwu: hey baby
junguwu: i don’t think that’s going to be possible, we… aren’t really okay anymore already

:D : wait what why
:D : what happened

junguwu: i fucked up again
junguwu: and i doubt we’re gonna be okay for some while now

:D : oh

junguwu: i’m sorry
read: 8:25 pm

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[8:26 pm]

:D : hey kun are you busy rn

cool dad: i’m never busy for you
cool dad: what is it, sweetheart?

:D : so uh
:D : i’ve got a bit of a situation that i’ve started crying
:D : and speaking from experience, if i’m with someone i love, i’ll calm down faster

cool dad: are you in your room? i’ll come over to you, baby
cool dad: what happened?

:D : i got to know that ten and jungwoo have argued again apparently and, idk, that just kinda made me
:D : sad

cool dad: oh baby, i know
cool dad: i’ll be right there
cool dad: they’ll be okay eventually, xuxi
cool dad: we’ll get them to talk soon, okay?
cool dad: they just need to calm down a bit

:D : i know, i’m just… sigh, i just want them to be okay
:D : i feel like i’m being torn to two sides and i don’t know on which side to be on
:D : and at the same time i know i’m not supposed to pick a side because i love them both
:D : but it feels like i can’t hang out with both of them either and i have no idea what’s the exact emotion i’m feeling

cool dad: i understand, baby
cool dad: i’ll be right there and we can talk about everything, okay?

:D : okay
:D : thank you
:D : i love you so much

cool dad: i love you, too

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[8:39 pm]

cool dad: hey ten
cool dad: it’d be really cool if you could rethink that talking with jungwoo and sicheng thing
cool dad: all three of you are upset about it and xuxi is, too
cool dad: and so am i

chittaphone: i’ll be willing to talk when sicheng is
chittaphone: but sicheng is even more stubborn than me, so good luck with that

 

[private chat with ten’s old phone]
[8:41 pm]

chittaphone: he keeps talking to me like a child
chittaphone: and acting like i’m at fault here
chittaphone: i’m sorry for not wanting to talk to the guy who kinda ruined my whole relationship with sicheng and made him angry at me i guess
chittaphone: i’m more than ninety per cent sure that kun hasn’t even tried talking to sicheng yet
chittaphone: makes me feel rly fucking shitty ngl
chittaphone: i hate this
chittaphone: i’m probably going to have to pretend that i’m okay with everything again just for the sake of everyone being happy except for myself
chittaphone: fuck everything

Chapter Text

[private chat with here’s Johnald]
[9:11 am]

chittaphone: hey babe
chittaphone: do you wanna go out today?

here’s Johnald: oh? i’d be happy to!!
here’s Johnald: anytime with you uwu

chittaphone: where do you want to go?

here’s Johnald: i don’t really care as long as it’s with you
here’s Johnald: we can go wherever you want to go

chittaphone: do you think we could go get some bubble tea
chittaphone: and then maybe take some pictures n stuff?
chittaphone: we haven’t done that in a while

here’s Johnald: that’s perfect
here’s Johnald: do you still have to get ready or are we going now or

chittaphone: we can go in an hour or a bit less?
chittaphone: i want to take a shower and then look pretty for you uwu

here’s Johnald: there is not a single day when you are not pretty

chittaphone: you’re sappy and disgusting
chittaphone: i love you

here’s Johnald: i love you too even though you are mean

chittaphone: i’m lovely, ur the mean one
chittaphone: don’t bully me

here’s Johnald: this level of disrespect is
here’s Johnald: disrespectful

chittaphone: your vocabulary astounds me

here’s Johnald: Shut

chittaphone: see ur bullying me again
chittaphone: i have RIGHTS
chittaphone: FREE SPEECH

here’s Johnald: sigh
here’s Johnald: what have i started

chittaphone: A REVOLUTION

here’s Johnald: oh no
here’s Johnald: can it start later

chittaphone: it’s on pause now bc i have to shower and do my makeup
chittaphone: it can continue then

here’s Johnald: makeup?

chittaphone: yeah my skin isn’t being nice to me so i wanna do it to look prettier
chittaphone: oh no are you going to interrogate me about this now

here’s Johnald: it’s not an interrogation
here’s Johnald: it’s just that you don’t wear makeup when we don’t have schedules
here’s Johnald: so when you do, it’s either because you haven’t slept or because you’ve cried
here’s Johnald: and neither of those things are too good

chittaphone: i just have irritated skin, johnny
chittaphone: it’s red and it wouldn’t look good in pictures, that’s all there is to it

here’s Johnald: the reason you don’t do makeup on the daily basis is that you don’t want to fuck up ur skin
here’s Johnald: have you been sleeping okay?
here’s Johnald: don’t hide things from me, please

chittaphone: i’m changing my habits, that’s what people do sometimes
chittaphone: why do you never trust me

here’s Johnald: i trust you, ten
here’s Johnald: you just… lie sometimes, and i don’t like that so i’m trying to get the truth out of you

chittaphone: huh, isn’t that funny
chittaphone: “lie sometimes”
chittaphone: don’t you think there’s a reason for me to “lie sometimes”

here’s Johnald: that came out wrong
here’s Johnald: i’m sorry, i didn’t mean it like that

chittaphone: how did you mean it then?
chittaphone: did you mean lie as in to lie down? i doubt that
chittaphone: and sometimes only has one meaning as far as i know
chittaphone: so it can’t really be interpreted in another way

here’s Johnald: i’m worried about you

chittaphone: i’m fine! i’m not a child! i can deal with my own shit!
chittaphone: i’m gonna go now before i say something
chittaphone: i don’t think we can go out today
chittaphone: let’s talk later

here’s Johnald: ten…
here’s Johnald: let’s please talk now

chittaphone: give me my space
chittaphone: i’ll text you when i’m willing to talk

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[12:52 pm]

cool dad: talk to jungwoo

chittaphone: hi ten
chittaphone: how are you ten
chittaphone: have you been sleeping well ten
chittaphone: thanks ten y’know sometimes i feel like you’re the only one that cares about me

cool dad: don’t act like a child

chittaphone: i’m alright it’s just that sometimes my boyfriends patronize and nag me but it’s okay i guess
chittaphone: what about you

cool dad: ten, please, don’t be like this

chittaphone: oh sorry you’re talking, i didn’t notice as you did greet me or say my name earlier
chittaphone: oh well, y’know, happens to all of us sometimes
chittaphone: i guess you wanted to say something?

cool dad: talk to jungwoo and sicheng, please
cool dad: you’re gonna have to talk sooner or later
cool dad: everyone’s upset

chittaphone: yeah, everyone is
chittaphone: including me, kun
chittaphone: you keep considering everyone’s feelings except for mine
chittaphone: i’m not ready to fucking talk
chittaphone: i’m sorry, i’m just not
chittaphone: i know i have to talk to them but i can’t, not now at least
chittaphone: so if i could get more than a few hours without constant nagging, it’d be great
chittaphone: let me think
chittaphone: stop patronising me
chittaphone: you’re not being helpful when i’m on the brink of crying over fucking everything
chittaphone: i’m not asking you to not consider others’ emotions, but consider mine too once in a while, that’d be a great improvement

cool dad: ten…

chittaphone: not now
chittaphone: let me be
chittaphone: i’m tired
chittaphone: we can talk later

 

[private chat with ten’s old phone]
[1:03 pm]

chittaphone: i know they all mean well
chittaphone: but this is too much, i can’t
chittaphone: i don’t think they realize that it’s hard for me too
chittaphone: i’m not a child
chittaphone: all i was asking for was to actually greet me, ask me how i’m doing
chittaphone: just that
chittaphone: isn’t that how relationships are supposed to go?
chittaphone: how would i know
chittaphone: the only boyfriend i’m on good terms with is taeyong now and i doubt even he’s gonna be okay with me when kun and just everyone else talk to him
chittaphone: love that for me
chittaphone: my life’s going great
chittaphone: what did i ever do to deserve this, what the fuck

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[1:10 pm]

tendery enthusiast: hey ten
tendery enthusiast: wanna go out

chittaphone: don’t
chittaphone: i can’t

tendery enthusiast: is everything okay?

chittaphone: no
chittaphone: i cab’t breathe
chittaphone: i can’t
chittaphone: fuck im panicking olease help

tendery enthusiast: deep breaths i’ll be right there, okay?

chittaphone: i cant take adeep vreath if i cant breathe
chittaphone: please come here i don’t knwo what to do

tendery enthusiast: i’ll be right there sweetheart
tendery enthusiast: can you tell me five things you can see

chittaphone: no im under my blanke tand the inly thing i see is ny phone

tendery enthusiast: four things you can touch?

chittaphone: i can’t concentrate on that
chittaphone: im sorry i cant
chittaphone: i needair

tendery enthusiast: i’ll be right there
tendery enthusiast: can you take the blanket off so you can get some more air?
tendery enthusiast: ten?
tendery enthusiast: ten, love, are you there?

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[1:14 pm]

tendery enthusiast: kun i need help
tendery enthusiast: ten was having a panic attack and they couldn’t breathe and i guess they got up to open a window or something but they fainted instead
tendery enthusiast: i put them in bed for now

cool dad: oh fuck
cool dad: i’ll be right there
cool dad: just make sure they’re not too cold or too hot
cool dad: and open that window if they didn’t get to yet
cool dad: did ten tell you why they were panicking?

tendery enthusiast: no, i didn’t ask
tendery enthusiast: [screenshots attached]
tendery enthusiast: they look like they haven’t slept in ages, too

cool dad: let them sleep then, i’ll be there in a bit
cool dad: i’ll text taeyong

tendery enthusiast: okay, i’ll be waiting

 

[private chat with actual angel]
[1:17 pm]

cool dad: ten’s room asap
cool dad: they fainted

actual angel: what how what the fuck happened

cool dad: they were having a panic attack and they couldn’t breathe
cool dad: and when they got up, they fainted

actual angel: holy shit okay i’ll be right there
actual angel: do you know why they were panicking?

cool dad: i’m pretty sure it’s because of me
cool dad: i think i was pushing them too hard to talk to woo and sicheng

actual angel: kun you know that ten always talks things through when they argue with someone
actual angel: sooner or later but they do
actual angel: they keep their own feelings in but when it affects someone else, they strive for the best
actual angel: they don’t need pushing

cool dad: i know
cool dad: you should probably read our chat so you can get everything better
cool dad: i know i’m at fault here
cool dad: and i’ll apologize to them the very second i can

actual angel: send me screenshots of your conversation please

cool dad: [screenshots attached]

actual angel: jesus christ
actual angel: you do know ten’s right, right?
actual angel: they would’ve talked when they were ready but god knows when that might be now

cool dad: i know

actual angel: i don’t think it’s a good thing if the first person ten sees when they wake up is you
actual angel: no offence, it’s just that if you caused their panic attack, they might not want to see you first thing they wake up

cool dad: i’m still going to them
cool dad: i want to make sure they’re okay
cool dad: i can leave you and kunhang with them afterwards
cool dad: but i need to make sure they’re okay

actual angel: okay

cool dad: kunhang said they looked like they hadn’t slept for ages so they’ll probably sleep for a long time

actual angel: well, i guess at least they’ll get enough sleep then
actual angel: i’ll tell johnny and i think both jungwoo and sicheng should know, too

cool dad: okay
cool dad: i can tell jungwoo and sicheng?

actual angel: okay, go ahead

 

[private chat with here’s Johnald]
[1:27 pm]

actual angel: hi please come to ten’s room when you can

here’s Johnald: hey
here’s Johnald: i don’t think ten would want me there, we kind of argued

actual angel: what
actual angel: with you too?
actual angel: now it’s even more understandable why they had a panic attack then

here’s Johnald: are they okay??

actual angel: they fainted
actual angel: they aren’t hurt, though, and are just sleeping for now
actual angel: but if you two argued, don’t come
actual angel: kunhang and i’ll stay with them

here’s Johnald: i’ll come, make sure they’re okay and then i can go

actual angel: okay

Chapter Text

[private chat with actual angel]
[1:41 pm]

junguwu: hi taeyong
junguwu: i heard what happened, is ten okay?
junguwu: please tell me if there’s something i can do to help
junguwu: i get they don’t want me there but if i can do anything for them, please tell me

actual angel: hey woo
actual angel: they’re just sleeping now so there’s nothing anyone can do at the moment, to be honest
actual angel: we just have to let them rest, they have really dark circles under their eyes, so it really does seem like their insomnia has gotten the best of them

 

[private chat with loselose]
[1:45 pm]

junguwu: hi sicheng, from what i understand, ten didn’t get to explain to you what happened the other day based on how you haven’t interacted with each other for… a while. i just want to say that it’s in no way ten’s fault; i kissed them - ten didn’t initiate the kiss. and i was only there because i was helping them choose what to wear. i’m really sorry, i know i shouldn’t have kissed them then, it was your time and it was very rude of me

loselose: oh
loselose: why didn’t you tell me earlier
loselose: i thought they...
loselose: fuck
loselose: do you know where ten is?

junguwu: i wanted to tell you but ten told me not to
junguwu: and i had messed up enough to follow through
junguwu: but if they fainted just now because of a panic attack and not having slept for days, i think i kind of have to take the matter into my own hands and try to turn this right
junguwu: at least for you two

loselose: they fainted???

junguwu: yes
junguwu: i don’t know the details, i only heard they had a panic attack and now they’re unconscious
junguwu: they’re okay, though, don’t worry

loselose: fuck
loselose: do you think i can go and see them

junguwu: as far as i know, even kun and johnny aren’t there
junguwu: only taeyong and kunhang
junguwu: so i really don’t know
junguwu: they need rest anyway, so maybe just text taeyong to tell you when they’re okay enough to actually see you?

loselose: okay thank you
loselose: that’s a good idea

 

[private chat with moonmoon]
[1:57 pm]

loselose: so i’m a fucking asshole

moonmoon: what why no you’re not
moonmoon: you’re lovely

loselose: well, if i hadn’t blocked ten, i would’ve known that it was jungwoo who kissed ten not the other way around AND jungwoo was only there because he was helping ten choose an outfit and so he initiated the kiss
loselose: and now ten’s had a panic attack
loselose: which i guess is because, from what i’ve heard, they’ve argued with… a lot of people including me
loselose: and they fainted

moonmoon: oh…
moonmoon: i mean, to be fair, it didn’t seem like ten would do that

loselose: god i know
loselose: but i was just so upset then and couldn’t hold back
loselose: i’m so fucking dumb

moonmoon: i’m not saying you did the right thing, but you are just a human being, sicheng
moonmoon: people make mistakes
moonmoon: and if they own up to them, they more often than not get forgiven
moonmoon: just talk to them when you can
moonmoon: get to be the first in line when everyone starts their apology tour

loselose: i’ll try to
loselose: anyway i have to text taeyong rn so i’ll see you in a bit

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[4:27 pm]

rainbow demon: due to recent events, Wong Yukhei is under our (Huang Renjun, lee donghyuck, lee m*rk, na jaemin, lee jeno) custody under further notice

nana: why are renjun and xuxi’s names the only names capitalized
nana: am i worse than them
nana: don’t answer that, i know i am
nana: but still

rainbow demon: renjun and xuxi are the only ones who Deserve to be capitalized
rainbow demon: do you rly think you and m*rk and jeno deserve the same respect as them
rainbow demon: bc ur wrong as Heck for that

country boy: why are you censoring my name
country boy: what have i ever done to you

rainbow demon: you breathed in my direction the other day
rainbow demon: that’s more than enough

country boy: i can’t believe this
country boy: xuxi would never treat my like this

:D : hey guys
:D : i’m sorry i don’t think i’ve got the energy to hang out properly so we can have the whole custody thing another day?

demon rainbow: no
demon rainbow: we’re going to donghyuck’s room. putting you in bed all nice and warm under a blanket. and then we’re serving you all you want to have - chocolate, ice cream, cookies, chips, - you name it
demon rainbow: you ask for it and we’ll give it to you because it’s what you deserve
demon rainbow: at all times both of ur sides can and will be cuddled at your wish
demon rainbow: kisses can also be requested and they will be given to you by one of us

:D : did y’all know that i love you a lot

rainbow demon: obviously

demon rainbow: donghyuck shut up
demon rainbow: we love you too!!!

rainbow demon: bitch

demon rainbow: oh no don’t say that
demon rainbow: k*n’s gonna come here and give us a lecture about swearing

junguwu: kun’s busy at the moment, he can’t give you a lecture

rainbow demon: BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH BITCH
rainbow demon: i can do whatever i want hehe

actual angel: no you cannot
actual angel: i can’t stay here for long bc i’m busy too but donghyuck you are Not allowed to do everything you want

rainbow demon: that’s just mean
rainbow demon: why would you say that :(

demon rainbow: why is everyone so busy suddenly

rainbow demon: i dunno
rainbow demon: we are Children therefore we don’t have to know
rainbow demon: let’s take xuxi and have a business free life

demon rainbow: is that really the noun you get out of busy
demon rainbow: well, i guess there’s nothing else
demon rainbow: idk i’m almost as dumb as you are

rainbow demon: HEY
rainbow demon: nvm that’s actually fair,,

 

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[4:38 pm]

junguwu: hey, i wanted to thank you for taking care of xuxi like this
junguwu: he really deserves it and i’m glad that you can provide that kind of care to him, since we’ve been in a… not necessarily good place since i argued with ten
junguwu: but that’s going into specifics, let’s not do that
junguwu: i just wanted to thank you for that

rainbow demon: it’s my pleasure uwu
rainbow demon: xuxi is the only boy ever and i just want him to be happy, so i wanted to do something for him
rainbow demon: i hope you two are okay again soon

junguwu: oh we’re okay, we’re just at a… slightly worse level of okay if that makes sense?
junguwu: but that’s probably because both of us are fairly upset
junguwu: there just kinda hasn’t been enough communication going on lately

rainbow demon: in that case, i hope both you and xuxi and you and ten talk everything out soon enough

junguwu: thank you, i hope so too

Chapter Text

[2:47 am]
[missed call from actual angel]

[private chat with actual angel]
[2:48 am]

junguwu: wha

actual angel: hi i know it’s really late but ten just woke up and they’re asking for both you and sicheng
actual angel: they’re nearly crying, too, so i couldn’t really say no

junguwu: i’ll be right there
junguwu: should i take sicheng as well? you can pay attention to ten until we come

actual angel: that’d be great, thank you

 

[private chat with cool dad]
[4:13 am]

actual angel: hey
actual angel: ten woke up some while ago and they just had a long conversation with jungwoo and sicheng
actual angel: it seems like they’re okay now
actual angel: they told me to tell you and to not hide anything, so i guess i’m giving you a more or less summary of their conversation?
actual angel: so both jungwoo and sicheng came really quick, they were both still in pyjamas
actual angel: and ten cried for about ten minutes upon seeing them, both of them were hugging ten all through that
actual angel: then ten apologized like a hundred and seven times because they were crying and then another fifteen just because they’re Just Like That
actual angel: and i think ten finally actually let out all what they feel
actual angel: i don’t remember it word for word but what they said was really beautiful
actual angel: something along the lines of “i love the both of you so, so much, and these past days without you have been genuine hell, arguing with you made me fall on bad terms with kun and johnny as well because i was so affected by how i felt after arguing with you that i couldn’t even think straight. i should’ve talked with you earlier but, i guess, i never do, i’m sorry for that”
actual angel: then sicheng apologized profusely for not listening to ten when they were trying to talk to him about what had happened
actual angel: ten said they understood (and, i mean, it’s obvious they didn’t because they don’t do that)
actual angel: then came jungwoo’s turn and he just said something about everything being just excuses and that he was sorry but that he though ten shouldn’t forgive him
actual angel: ten, of course, forgave him
actual angel: and jungwoo swore he wouldn’t pull the shit he did ever again
actual angel: ten said you and johnny should come in the morning
actual angel: sounds like they want to make up with everybody
actual angel: anyway, i’m really tired, too, so i’m going to bed
actual angel: i’m leaving ten with jungwoo and sicheng for the rest of the night
actual angel: please don’t wake me earlier than 2 pm thank you
actual angel: as you could guess, i’m not making breakfast, i haven’t slept at all yet

 

[private chat with actual angel]
[4:41 am]

chittaphone: hi
chittaphone: i just wanted to thank you a lot for being here for me

actual angel: hey, ten, i love you, of course i’d be there

chittaphone: i love you too
chittaphone: now go sleep,good night!!

 

[private chat with tendery enthusiast]
[4:46 am]

chittaphone: hi, i guess you found me when i was already unconscious
chittaphone: i wanted to say thank you to you because you’re a wonderful person

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[9:29 am]

:D : i’m coming back to you
:D : ten’s already with jungwoo and sicheng, sleeping, apparently

rainbow demon: oh worm???
rainbow demon: so they’re okay now?

:D : i guess

rainbow demon: that’s great then!!
rainbow demon: ten had been looking so upset these past days

:D : yeah

rainbow demon: you don’t seem so happy about them being okay again
rainbow demon: what’s wrong?

:D : oh no, i’m happy they’re okay, it’s not that

rainbow demon: what is it then?
rainbow demon: because it is something anyway

:D : i guess i’m a tiny bit upset that i’m always the last one to know of things and no one really deems it necessary to go “hey xuxi should know this and than too”
:D : but it’s okay, i understand
:D : as long as they’re happy!! :D

rainbow demon: >:( do u want me to beat everyone up

:D : a) no,
:D : b) you’re tiny and adorable, you could never beat anyone up

rainbow demon: I Am Filled With Rage

:D : then you must have really little rage because you’re,,,, Small and Tiny
:D : don’t beat anyone up, u can cuddle w me instead when i get back in bed uwu

rainbow demon: i am big :(

:D : i
:D : yes, you are, you’re huge, now pls don’t be :(

rainbow demon: c:
rainbow demon: omg can i smooch u when u get here

:D: do it twice and we can think about it
:D : one smooch will just leave me wanting for more and that’s sad
:D : two is a slightly more appropriate amount

rainbow demon: you can get all the smooches because it’s what you deserve
rainbow demon: do you mind if renjun comes as well, they just texted me

:D : perfect
:D : can i get smooched by them as well

rainbow demon: most definitely
rainbow demon: xuxi, you don’t even have to ask, you can get smooched by anyone at all if you ask

:D : :D!!!

 

[ten created a group chat ‘sry’]
[ten added here’s Johnald and cool dad]
[10:18 am]

chittaphone: hi
chittaphone: i currently have sicheng and jungwoo still sleeping next to me, but i’m awake so i want to be productive
chittaphone: i owe you both an apology, i acted stupidly and shouldn’t have snapped at either of you and i promise you that’s not going to happen again
chittaphone: you deserve better than this, i’m really really sorry
chittaphone: you deserve a better apology than this as well

here’s Johnald: hey sweetheart it’s okay you were upset and i was pushing you a bit too hard, i should’ve let you be and let you come to me instead
here’s Johnald: are you feeling okay now?

chittaphone: not okay, no
chittaphone: but better, definitely, and that’s all that matters

here’s Johnald: i’m so glad about that

cool dad: ten…
cool dad: i’m the one who’s supposed to apologize
cool dad: your reaction was completely fair and valid, i was the one who stepped far over the line
cool dad: so i’m sorry

chittaphone: you were right though
chittaphone: i did act like a child
chittaphone: but i’m trying to fix that problem now

cool dad: i love you, ten

chittaphone: i love you too

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[10:27 am]

cool dad: ten, sweetheart

chittaphone: hi
chittaphone: what’s up

cool dad: i wanted to bring your apology up in private, actually
cool dad: you had nothing to apologize for
cool dad: you were acting like any normal human being would, your attitude wasn’t childish - mine was
cool dad: and i’m so sorry for pushing you like that
cool dad: i knew you would’ve talked to jungwoo and sicheng eventually but i still pushed you and all that led to not sleeping, having a panic attack and even fainting
cool dad: so you had nothing to apologize for, ten, i did
cool dad: and i am sorry because i love you and i should’ve actually used my head to think instead of just attacking you

chittaphone: hey, no, it’s okay
chittaphone: neither of us were right
chittaphone: let’s just put it all behind of us, okay?

cool dad: okay
cool dad: i love you so much

chittaphone: i love you, too

 

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[10:42 am]

tendery enthusiast: is anyone up for a cuddling session
tendery enthusiast: i’m tired and want to hug someone while i sleep

yang squared: i’m always down for a cuddling session!!!
yang squared: when and where

tendery enthusiast: come here, now

yang squared: i know that ‘here’ makes a lot of sense to you
yang squared: but i have no fucking clue where you are

cool dad: LANGUAGE

yang squared: this is how people talk these days, old man
yang squared: catch up

tendery enthusiast: i’m in my room
tendery enthusiast: and stop bullying kun, he’s doing his best

cool dad: thank you, kunhang, i appreciate you

tendery enthusiast: ur welcome
tendery enthusiast: i appreciate you too, grandpa

cool dad: nevermind, i don’t appreciate you anymore
cool dad: you’re not valid anymore

tendery enthusiast: no YOU’RE not valid >:(

chittaphone: neither of you are valid
chittaphone: the only valid person in this chat is sicheng

moonmoon: i agree wholeheartedly

chittaphone: taeil has a biased opinion
chittaphone: don’t listen to him

moonmoon: i literally agreed to your point, though

chittaphone: yeah but ur biased so i’m still not gonna listen to you
chittaphone: AND ur old so your opinion doesn’t matter

yang squared: the only person old here is kun, i thought we agreed on it already
yang squared: taeil ur just great, ten has no idea what they’re talking about

moonmoon: thanks, i know
moonmoon: how am i more biased than you, though

chittaphone: because i said so
chittaphone: you have a smaller range of people to give ur love to, so you put it into one person more than i do
chittaphone: therefore i’m less biased

moonmoon: yeah but sicheng deserves all the love
moonmoon: even if i had to divide my love up for everyone to get, i’d give the same amount to sicheng as i already do

chittaphone: oh that’s so valid
chittaphone: maybe your opinion matters something
chittaphone: not a lot, obviously, but a tiny bit

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[4:29 pm]

chittaphone: hi baby
chittaphone: jungwoo and sicheng and i all talked finally

:D : yeah i noticed
:D : i’m glad you did

chittaphone: do you want to have dinner with jungwoo an i, sweetheart?
chittaphone: i miss you

:D : i’d love that
:D : when & where

chittaphone: come to my room at around 6 <3

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[4:31 pm]

chittaphone: xuxi’s coming at six so we should start getting ready
chittaphone: get the blankets, i think we could build a big pillow&blanket fort instead of trying to make an indoor picnic

junguwu: omg that’s perfect, yes please
junguwu: he’ll love that

chittaphone: good
chittaphone: bring all your blankets and pillows, i’ll start making it already with what i have here
chittaphone: do you know what kun’s making for dinner

junguwu: no idea, i only know it’s gonna be Delicious

chittaphone: alright fair enough
chittaphone: we should get a bunch of snacks for xuxi, i want to make him happy today

junguwu: you just being there with him is gonna make him happy, trust me
junguwu: you’re lovely

chittaphone: oh stop that, no
chittaphone: just get your ass here, for christ’s sake

 

[private chat with jong jinrak]
[5:52 pm]

tall baby: holla

jong jinrak: hello

tall baby: i loveth thee
tall baby: how are thee

jong jinrak: see, if you talked like human beings do, i would answer to your question
jong jinrak: but this doesn’t warrant my reply so bye bitch

tall baby: thou art so cullionly
tall baby: Thee knoweth, thee walketh out the doth'r. Thee seeth someone yond thee knoweth, and those gents asketh thee how thou art, and thee just has't to sayeth yond thou art fine, at which hour thou art not very much fine, but thee just can't receiveth into t because those gents wouldst nev'r und'rstand

jong jinrak: oh my god i can’t stand you
jong jinrak: this is it, this is the last straw, i no longer know a jisung

tall baby: stop :((
tall baby: i deserve better than this

jong jinrak: no you don’t
jong jinrak: if you deserve better than this, start ACTING like it
jong jinrak: you have time until tomorrow bc if you don’t make up to me for making me read that, i’m not giving you even one (1) kiss and it’ll all be your fault

tall baby: GASP
tall baby: this is unacceptable
tall baby: i’m calling cps

jong jinrak: and what are you gonna say to them

tall baby: that you’re bullying me and refusing proper care :(
tall baby: everyone knows i need at least two of ur kisses per day to grow big and strong

jong jinrak: are you clifford the dog or smth
jong jinrak: am i the emily to your clifford

tall baby: i do Not appreciate you calling me a dog
tall baby: that’s mean

jong jinrak: i’m mean, live with it
jong jinrak: you love me anyway
jong jinrak: and i love you uwu

tall baby: omg our minds

Chapter Text

[private chat with country boy]
[8:21 pm]

:D : can i yell for a second

country boy: of course, any time
country boy: what about

:D : about how much i love ten and jungwoo
:D : ten asked me to have dinner with them and told me to come to their room at 6
:D : and i did and ten and jungwoo had made a big pillow fort together and brought snacks there
:D : and they both keep cuddling me and my heart is so fucking weak
:D : i love them
:D : we’re watching a cheesy drama and it’s just so… perfect
:D : i’m so happy that everything’s okay again, i don’t either of the could’ve taken more of this
:D : i don’t think i could’ve taken more of that either

country boy: i’m glad everyone’s okay again
country boy: all of you seemed so stressed and upset

:D : honestly, we were
:D : i think ten’s still tense after everything

country boy: i’d be surprised if they weren’t honestly

 

[private chat with here’s Johnald]
[8:45 pm]

cool dad: can we make ten a perfect date night
cool dad: all ten’s boyfriends + sicheng and xuxi and jungwoo
cool dad: they deserve some positivity and i feel like that guarantees it

here’s Johnald: that’s great, i agree
here’s Johnald: ten’s with xuxi and jungwoo right now so we can text everyone else first and talk to them about it tomorrow

cool dad: alright, i’ll text taeyong, you text sicheng?

here’s Johnald: yeah alright

 

[private chat with loselose]
[8:49 pm]

here’s Johnald: hey
here’s Johnald: kun had a rly good idea that we (ten’s boyfies, you, jungwoo, and xuxi) could make a date night with them all together
here’s Johnald: they’ve been through so much hurt that they should have some happiness
here’s Johnald: you in?

loselose: of course
loselose: just tell me what i have to do and i’ll gladly do so

here’s Johnald: perfect
here’s Johnald: there’s no plan yet and we have yet to talk to jungwoo and xuxi tomorrow
here’s Johnald: but Perfect

 

[private chat with prince yuta]
[9:02 pm]

loselose: hi sweetheart

prince yuta: hewWO
prince yuta: how are u uwuwu

loselose: i’m good!! it seems like we’re all making up to ten finally
loselose: how are you?

prince yuta: i’m great, my dysphoria has said bye bye for now and i feel amazing :D
prince yuta: come over?

loselose: which pronouns do you use today?
loselose: and of course i’ll come over uwu

prince yuta: i’m more on the they/them side for now
prince yuta: i’m kinning with ten in secret

loselose: never EVER say kinning again, i’ll be legally required to murder you

prince yuta: you’re just too afraid to accept the truth
prince yuta: we’re kinning and it’s a fact

loselose: partner card revoked, i don’t know yuta anymore
loselose: you don’t exist, poof, gone, just like that

prince yuta: now you see that’s just mean
prince yuta: i’m a nice person but you’re just being so rude to me, i can’t take this

loselose: sucks to be you

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[9:41 pm]

prince yuta: hey ten

chittaphone: should i be scared
chittaphone: is everything alright

prince yuta: s-should there be a reason for me to say something that would make you scared
prince yuta: is there something you wanna tell me that would make either of us scared

chittaphone: only the neverending and unstoppable passage of time
chittaphone: but not rly
chittaphone: what’s up

prince yuta: are you free to talk rn or not

chittaphone: i’m with xuxi and jungwoo right now but if you don’t tell me now, i’m gonna be anxious
chittaphone: so lay it on me yeehaw

prince yuta: i kin with you

chittaphone: what the fuck
chittaphone: do i even want to know what you mean

prince yuta: that’s my coming out to you smh
prince yuta: uhhhh i’m genderfluid

chittaphone: ah okay i’m glad you’ve told me that but never ever say that you kin with me ever again
chittaphone: the only people i let kin with me is The Kim Hyuna and The Min Yoongi
chittaphone: ONLY her

prince yuta: oh okay yeah that’s valid
prince yuta: but um yeah i just wanted to say that

chittaphone: right, who else knows?
chittaphone: and what pronouns do you use now?

prince yuta: sicheng, kun, and taeil know
prince yuta: and i use they/them for now

chittaphone: so that’s why ur kinning with me right now
chittaphone: thank you for telling me
chittaphone: tbh i had my suspicions

prince yuta: oh worm?
prince yuta: how so?

chittaphone: a certain person was messing ur pronouns up all the time
chittaphone: i doubt anyone else caught on, though, it’s just more noticable for me
chittaphone: plus you kind of change your attitude on certain days
chittaphone: so yeah, dw no one else knows i’m pretty sure

prince yuta: how did you actually get the courage to come out to everyone
prince yuta: it took me ages to come out to kun

chittaphone: i just told myself to stop being a lil bitch and did it

prince yuta: oh that’s valid
prince yuta: wasn’t it really hard to, though?
prince yuta: especially bc you were the first that realized that you were gq and no one else had come out yet

chittaphone: bold of you to assume i had any shame, dignity, or self-preservation yeehaw

prince yuta: oh that’s valid
prince yuta: why do you yeehaw though

chittaphone: because I Can
chittaphone: why wouldn’t i

prince yuta: because it’s cursed
prince yuta: i’m disappointed

chittaphone: ur not the only one, buddy
chittaphone: i’m disappointed in myself and everyone else 24/7

prince yuta: valid
prince yuta: for a good reason, too
prince yuta: i kin with you

chittaphone: sigh
chittaphone: i’m gonna mf block you if you say you kin with something again

prince yuta: but i DO
prince yuta: stop silencing my valid emotions

chittaphone: they’re not valid, yuta
chittaphone: you Need Help with them
chittaphone: you need to Hide Those Emotions

prince yuta: you’re evil

Chapter Text

[private chat with actual angel]
[10:23 pm]

country boy: knock knock

actual angel: oh no
actual angel: who’s there

country boy: robin

actual angel: sighs
actual angel: robin who

country boy: robin you, now hand over ur cash

actual angel: are you short on cash, baby?
actual angel: you should’ve said so immediately
actual angel: how much do you need, sweetheart?

country boy: n-no, i’m trying to Make A Joke

actual angel: every joke has a part of truth in it
actual angel: i’ll venmo you a hundred dollars, is that okay?

country boy: taeyong pls i don’t need money
country boy: don’t
country boy: also why are you saying dollars, we’re in korea

actual angel: yeah but 100k won sounds like A Lot
actual angel: dollars are easier

country boy: fair enough
country boy: but please don’t venmo me any money
country boy: nevermind you’ve already done it, huh
country boy: i love you with my entire heart but i really have enough of everything

actual angel: keep it, treat yourself
actual angel: buy yourself something nice
actual angel: buy something for hyuckie or xuxi, there are endless possibilities

country boy: did you know you’re amazing

actual angel: you’re even more amazing, sunshine
actual angel: how was your day?

country boy: it was pretty good, i spent some time with renjun and we cuddled and stuff
country boy: then hyuck came and jumped on both of us so we almost suffocated
country boy: worth it nonetheless, it’s hyuck after all
country boy: what about you? how are you, how’s ten?

actual angel: ten and i both got some sleep finally, so i’m good and ten’s… they’re definitely better than before
actual angel: i’m pretty sure they’re with xuxi and jungwoo now, so it’s looking up for all of them finally
actual angel: everyone was affected by it, i’m pretty sure even you felt it by how xuxi wasn’t his normal happy self for a while

country boy: yeah, it was upsetting to see
country boy: they aren’t going to argue again, are they?

actual angel: no, sweetheart, i don’t think so
actual angel: ten’s been through so much already, i don’t think anyone’s going to try to pick a fight with them anymore
actual angel: and they aren’t going to do that themselves either
actual angel: kun’s learnt from his mistakes, so has jungwoo, sicheng’s gonna listen to ten if anything, and johnny… well, he didn’t really do anything wrong, ten was just upset, so no, i don’t think anything’s going to happen to ten and everyone else
actual angel: at least for a while

country boy: i’m glad
country boy: another sad xuxi is something i could not bear
country boy: and he’s upset over Anyone fighting

actual angel: well, i don’t think you have to worry about that
actual angel: anyway, it’s late, baby, you should sleep

country boy: i’d argue that’s it’s not so late but i’m genuinely tired so i agree
country boy: goodnight uwu i love you so much

actual angel: i love you too, sweetheart, sleep well

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D]
[1:27 am]

chittaphone: hey xuxi, are you awake, baby?

:D : yeah, just getting ready for bed
:D : is everything alright?

chittaphone: yeah everything’s great dw
chittaphone: i was just thinking about our… relationship currently
chittaphone: and it doesn’t really differ from a relationship with a label
chittaphone: so, i was wondering
chittaphone: would you like to be officially dating? with the label of it and all that comes with it
chittaphone: i love and trust you immensely and i feel like there isn’t a reason for us not to put a label on it, as long as you still want that

:D : of course i want that!!!!!
:D : omg ur officially my partner, my datemate, my loverpal, the loml

chittaphone: and i’ve got the cutest boyfriend, this is perfect
chittaphone: i love you, baby

:D : i love you!!!! more!!!!!!!!!
:D : can i come over i wanna smooch and cuddle you a bunch

chittaphone: i can come over to you, i’m ready for bed so while i get here you can get ready as well and we can just cuddle
chittaphone: if you come, you’ll still have to get ready and that takes time :( and i wanna cuddle you at the earliest possible convenience
chittaphone: my Boyfriend deserves all the cuddles because he’s the best boy ever and i LOVE him!!!!!!

:D : i love you more
:D : pls come, ur boyfriend wants smoochies a lot

chittaphone: already on my way, baby

:D : :D!!!

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[1:35 am]

chittaphone: hey, i finally asked xuxi out
chittaphone: so we’re finally officially dating
chittaphone: i know you’ve already had the talk that if i ask him out he doesn’t have to ask u n shit
chittaphone: so just an announcement that xuxi would send to you soon anyway

junguwu: oh worm??
junguwu: nice i’m happy for you two!!
junguwu: i’m assuming you’re staying at his tonight?

chittaphone: yeah i’m on my way there, why do you ask?

junguwu: oh no reason uwu
junguwu: sleep well!!

chittaphone: you too uwu

 

[private chat with rabbit(ch)]
[1:43 am]

junguwu: hey are you still awake

rabbit(ch): just barely
rabbit(ch): but yeah what’s up angel

junguwu: are you alone?

rabbit(ch): yeah
rabbit(ch): do you want to come over?

junguwu: yeah, thank you
junguwu: i don’t think this is gonna be a good night and xuxi’s with ten so i can’t go to him either, sorry

rabbit(ch): don’t be sorry
rabbit(ch): would you rather i come to you?

junguwu: no don’t bother
junguwu: i’m gonna take some stuff and then come to you <3
junguwu: i love you a lot

rabbit(ch): i love you more
rabbit(ch): should i warm your side of bed up uwu

junguwu: i love you most
junguwu: and yes please

rabbit(ch): consider that done uwu

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[1:48 am]

:D : ten asked me out!!!
:D : we’re dating now!!!

junguwu: i know sweetheart i’m happy for you two!!
junguwu: you should sleep now, though
junguwu: it’s very late

:D : i will uwu
:D : i just wanted to tell u first
:D : but goodnight!! i love you!!

junguwu: i love you too baby, sleep well

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[3:45 am]

rabbit(ch): hey i know it’s almost 4 am and you’re sleeping but please text me when you’re awake
rabbit(ch): i’m really worried about jungwoo
rabbit(ch): his nightmares have gotten worse and he was so upset, i had to cradle him in my arms for twenty minutes until he finally calmed down and went back to sleep
rabbit(ch): and i don’t know how to initiate a conversation about it either, so if you could do it or give me some tips, it’d be great

[9:21 am]

cool dad: hey
cool dad: jungwoo’s been under a lot of emotional distress lately, therefore he’s been having more frequent nightmares than usual
cool dad: the whole situation with ten, y’know
cool dad: we’ve talked about it already, he promised me he’d talk to any one of his boyfriends if he had a nightmare and that if he felt like he was gonna have one, he’d stay over at someone’s room
cool dad: as far as i know, he’s been doing that
cool dad: there’s nothing much we can do about it
cool dad: once everything finally settles down properly, he’ll be okay
cool dad: ten and jungwoo just have to spend a bit more time together so he’s sure that everything between them is truly okay

rabbit(ch): do you think i should ask ten to, y’know, hang out with jungwoo a bit more
rabbit(ch): because he’s genuinely terrified when he wakes up and that’s upsetting to see

cool dad: yeah, that’d be good, actually
cool dad: do that

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[9:32 am]

rabbit(ch): hi
rabbit(ch): i’m worried about jungwoo and his nightmares and kun said they were more frequent because you two had argued
rabbit(ch): so maybe they’d lessen if you spent more time together
rabbit(ch): n yeah

chittaphone: oh shit
chittaphone: yeah of course
chittaphone: i’d love to go out with jungwoo anyway
chittaphone: tell me when he wakes up so i can ask if he wants to go somewhere, i don’t want to wake him up

rabbit(ch): okay, i will

 

[private chat with :D ]
[10:28 am]

rainbow demon: henlo
rainbow demon: do you have any plans for today

:D : no not really
:D : do you have an offer

rainbow demon: i do uwu
rainbow demon: renjun, nana, jeno, m*rk and i wanna hang out today but five is an odd number therefore not everyone has their corresponding pair

:D : oh worm?
:D : i’d love to come uwu

rainbow demon: great, ur going with renjun because i said so
rainbow demon: please tell that to them yourself or they might snap my neck

:D : do they dislike me that much that they have to snap ur neck for it :c

rainbow demon: anyone who dislikes you has an iq of -92
rainbow demon: while renjun is dumb, they’re not that dumb
rainbow demon: u’ll understand someday

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[10:34 am]

:D : hi junnie
:D : hyuck told me to announce that ur pair for today’s hanging out session is gonna be me

demon rainbow: screeEEEEEEECH
demon rainbow: sorry autocorrected

:D : w-what did that autocorrect from

demon rainbow: “that’s great, love it, can’t wait”
demon rainbow: my phone’s just acting up y’know

:D : o-oh
:D : that’s valid

demon rainbow: now please excuse me while i snap hyuck’s neck
demon rainbow: see you then uwu love you

:D : lov u too
:D : please don’t kill hyuck

demon rainbow: not killing him, just snapping his neck uwu

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[1:19 pm]

chittaphone: you me 3 pm my room

junguwu: that’s cryptic
junguwu: should i be scared or buy you a dictionary so you can write full sentences

chittaphone: no

junguwu: you can’t answer an “or” question with no
junguwu: that’s not how it works

chittaphone: yes

junguwu: you can’t reply to a statement with yes either
junguwu: ten bls
junguwu: i’m buying you a dictionary
junguwu: might be late bc the bookstore isn’t that close

chittaphone: no

junguwu: ten
junguwu: i’m going to throttle you

chittaphone: yes

junguwu: are you just changing ur answers every other time
junguwu: sigh

chittaphone: no

junguwu: squints
junguwu: okay, let’s try it another way, do you hate uhhhh mark

chittaphone: yes

junguwu: okay no that wasn’t the best question to ask, i wouldn’t have expected a different answer
junguwu: do you think you’re the best dancer in the industry

chittaphone: no

junguwu: sounds fake but that still neither confirms nor denies my doubts bc that could be ur genuine answer
junguwu: hhhhh okay let’s try it this way
junguwu: do you wanna date me

chittaphone: yes

junguwu: yeah okay ur just alternating ur answers
junguwu: i’ll see you at 3 uwu

chittaphone: bitch

junguwu: oh my gods! it speaks!
junguwu: what have i ever done to you for u to insult me like this (˃̩̩̥ɷ˂̩̩̥)

chittaphone: i wasn’t alternating my answers, tf
chittaphone: you were just asking questions like that
chittaphone: ofc i’d like to date you
chittaphone: like, that’s the whole thing why we argued the first time
chittaphone: i like you, you know that

junguwu: oh
junguwu: i thought that after all that’s happened, those feelings would’ve left

chittaphone: you’re still the same person and everyone argues sometimes
chittaphone: that doesn’t mean i’m going to love you less
chittaphone: i’ve argued with kun a lot but i still love him with my entire heart and i’d do anything for him
chittaphone: same goes for you
chittaphone: if you assume that the feelings are gone for me, then i have to ask if it’s like that for you?

junguwu: no, no
junguwu: i like you
junguwu: a lot
junguwu: i think that’s obvious by my jealousy fits
junguwu: i’m sorry for those

chittaphone: it’s okay, it’s understandable
chittaphone: taeyong used to get jealous at kun and taeil a lot at first
chittaphone: i used to get jealous at johnny and jaehyun
chittaphone: we all go through it at one point or another

junguwu: i was Not warned about that

chittaphone: no one was
chittaphone: it just happens and you just have to accept the reality of life or else ur gonna end up alone
chittaphone: ew that’s too deep for 1 pm
chittaphone: anyway
chittaphone: was that question, like, genuine
chittaphone: did you actually ask me out or was that a joke

junguwu: i mean, it was a joke but i can ask it again seriously
junguwu: because i’d love to date you
junguwu: so, uh, do you want to date me

chittaphone: absolutely
chittaphone: rescheduling, come over to me Right Now

junguwu: on my way!

Chapter Text

[private chat with :D ]
[3:48 pm]

demon rainbow: why are they koreaning so much
demon rainbow: i get that they don’t speak chinese
demon rainbow: but my brain Cannot Do This

:D : me when ten gets excited and starts trailing off in thai

demon rainbow: can a person survive a brain explosion
demon rainbow: i feel like mine’s gonna do a big boom, like, Right Now

:D : oh no that cannot happen
:D : how can i rescue you, my ruler ranked below a king

demon rainbow: is that the gender-neutral of prince
demon rainbow: because that’s amazing, i want to be called that

:D : yes, it is
:D : and u’ve got it, from now on ur gonna get called that

demon rainbow: thank u, ur a real one

:D : why is donghyuck ominously winking at us
:D : i’m so scared
:D : is he okay
:D : why is he smiling like that

demon rainbow: donghyuck is, in my humble opinion, a dumbass
demon rainbow: his winks are not to be trusted

:D : i’ve got an Idea

demon rainbow: i’m intrigued
demon rainbow: go ahead, please do tell

:D : let’s run away and not have to do any korean today anymore
:D : just like… let’s hide in jungwoo’s room - he’s at ten’s right now and will probably stay there
:D : wait let’s also steal some snacks

demon rainbow: xuxi… your mind…
demon rainbow: let’s do it
demon rainbow: i’m taking the cookies, you take the chips, we run in different directions and meet at jungwoo’s room

:D : sounds perfect
:D : on three
:D : one
:D : two
:D : THREE

 

[private chat with demon rainbow]
[3:56 pm]

nana: what the FUCK was that
nana: i want my cookies back
nana: where are you

demon rainbow: you’ll never find us
demon rainbow: Never

nana: sigh
nana: just pls return my cookies, i don’t need anything else

demon rainbow: no
demon rainbow: suffer

nana: you’re truly evil

demon rainbow: thanks i know
demon rainbow: have fun Without Your Cookies

nana: i’m going to have my revenge
nana: i’m not going to leave it like this

 

private chat with demon rainbow]
[3:58 pm]

rainbow demon: have fun boys ;);););)

demon rainbow: Please Stop

rainbow demon: ;););)

 

[private chat with junguwu]
[4:22 pm]

:D : hi renjun and i have invaded your room
:D : are you returning tonight or staying at ten’s

junguwu: i can ask ten if i can stay if you want me to, bub
junguwu: ten says they wouldn’t let me back even if i wanted to come
junguwu: so my room is yours completely

:D : ooh thank uwu

junguwu: no problem uwu have fun!!

:D : we will!! you too hehe

Chapter Text

[private chat with cool dad]
[6:27 pm]

rabbit(ch): all my boyfriends have Left Me
rabbit(ch): where are you, i need company

cool dad: oh worm
cool dad: come here i’m in my room
cool dad: we can cuddle if you wanna

rabbit(ch): there’s nothing i’d like more
rabbit(ch): we haven’t cuddled in so long suddenly i’m sad :(
rabbit(ch): why have we not cuddled, that’s illegal
rabbit(ch): i am deprived of your cuddles and demand them immediately upon arrival

cool dad: and you shall receive them
cool dad: just Come Here or i’m gonna be :c

rabbit(ch): oh no that cannot happen, you shall never be :(
rabbit(ch): that’s illegal, actually
rabbit(ch): i’ll be right there, so Get Ready

cool dad: wait no that being capitalised makes it very ominous and scary
cool dad: don’t want that anymore

rabbit(ch): then i’m going to be :( and that's illegal too
rabbit(ch): therefore you’re going to have to cuddle me whether you want it or not
rabbit(ch): unless you want to go to jail
rabbit(ch): which would be my arms, still, but u’d rather cuddle me willingly, right?

cool dad: you make a compelling point
cool dad: pls come over but take a bit of chocolate with you

rabbit(ch): aren’t i sweet enough?

cool dad: no
cool dad: give me chocolate or i’ll yeet you

rabbit(ch): oh no okay i’m getting you chocolate
rabbit(ch): i remember johnny yote ten and we couldn’t hear the end of it for days
rabbit(ch): i can still hear ten’s yelling, they were so loud

cool dad: the memory of it has been burnt in my mind
cool dad: it’s not something that can ever be forgotten
cool dad: mark was traumatized for days

rabbit(ch): and rightfully so
rabbit(ch): even taeil was and ten wasn’t yelling at him

cool dad: valid
cool dad: anyway Where Are You
cool dad: i’m needy :(

rabbit(ch): i had to make an extra turn to get u the chocolate, don’t complain smh

cool dad: but :(
cool dad: Come Here

rabbit(ch): i’m On My Way
rabbit(ch): i’m not going to Run

cool dad: why not :(

rabbit(ch): you really want me to run huh
rabbit(ch): you’re truly evil

cool dad: no i’m not
cool dad: i’m nice, you’re the mean one

rabbit(ch): HOW AM I THE MEAN ONE WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU

cool dad: you called me evil and aren’t next to me yet :(
cool dad: that makes you mean

rabbit(ch): squints
rabbit(ch): agree to disagree

cool dad: no, i don’t agree
cool dad: we’re disagreeing and i’m not agreeing with your disagreement
cool dad: you need to admit you’re a meanie

rabbit(ch): I May Be A Bitch but I Am Not A Meanie
rabbit(ch): especially not against my boyfriends
rabbit(ch): therefore you’re the mean one

cool dad: i’m lovely though :((
cool dad: aren’t i?

rabbit(ch): sigh
rabbit(ch): you are
rabbit(ch): i’m almost there

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[7:02 pm]

yang squared: looking for a new queerplatonic partner
yang squared: all submissions must be sent to me privately
yang squared: requirements: don’t be dejun or kun

eyebrow man: okay i get why not me but what did kun do to you

yang squared: he’s old
yang squared: kun’s lovely but i don’t want to have to mourn his death after like a week already
yang squared: i prefer my partner to be alive for at least 2 years if dating
yang squared: i found a year’s course of necromancy so if i think they’re a real one after a year of dating, i can start taking necromancy courses and then my partner can do whatever they want bc i can and will bring them back

eyebrow man: yangyang sweetie i don’t think that’s going to work

tendery enthusiast: wait why are you looking for a new partner
tendery enthusiast: you are my otp, don’t do that :(

yang squared: Dejun Is A Meanie

eyebrow man: that’s only what you think
eyebrow man: contrary to your beliefs, i’m actually very lovely

yang squared: well it Doesn’t Seem Like That

tendery enthusiast: a) is your caps lock key broken
tendery enthusiast: b) dejun might be a meanie but he’s a lovely meanie and we have to love him for who he is

yang squared: no we don’t
yang squared: he’s not valid

eyebrow man: :(
eyebrow man: you’re the mean one :(

yang squared: no i’m not
yang squared: kunhang pls tell dejun that i’m not mean

tendery enthusiast: you’re both mean
tendery enthusiast: that’s why you go together so well

yang squared: b-but i’m baby
yang squared: i cannot be mean, i’m… baby…

eyebrow man: oh shit you have a point there
eyebrow man: you are, indeed, baby

yang squared: exactly
yang squared: that’s why i cannot be mean, babies are cute and nice and i’m all of that, i’m the opposite of mean

tendery enthusiast: you are a mean baby

eyebrow man: no he’s obviously not
eyebrow man: yangyang is baby, he cannot be mean, you already heard what he said, trust him on this one smh

tendery enthusiast: but you just-
tendery enthusiast: i give up
tendery enthusiast: dejun and yangyang understanding machine broke
tendery enthusiast: that machine isn’t serving me anymore because i pulled the plug on it as it didn’t seem to be working either way

yang squared: you don’t have to understand us… just love us!

eyebrow man: yeah it’s probably more safe to not understand us, it’s a pretty bad idea
eyebrow man: just love us uwu

tendery enthusiast: sigh, i do
tendery enthusiast: that doesn’t mean y’all aren’t dumb as shit

eyebrow man: oh we’re aware
eyebrow man: we share half a brain cell and the most part of it has already died

yang squared: i thought it ran away… you lied to me…
yang squared: i cannot believe this

eyebrow man: i’m sorry i didn’t want to upset you
eyebrow man: i know you loved our 0.5 of a brain cell a lot…

yang squared: you are forgiven but will never be fogottwn

Chapter Text

[private chat with rabbit(ch)]
[9:02 pm]

junguwu: hey uh are you alone tonight or are you already with someone
junguwu: i don’t feel like it’s gonna be a bad night but i don’t wanna risk it with ten

rabbit(ch): i’m with kun but you can join us?
rabbit(ch): but i’m sure ten wouldn’t mind
rabbit(ch): they’ve been there with you multiple times, love
rabbit(ch): if you’re worried about ten’s reaction, you should just stay - they’d have to deal with it at some point anyway, just as they’ve dealt with it before
rabbit(ch): but you can come over if you don’t want to stay, still

junguwu: hnng
junguwu: i wanna stay with ten but i don’t want them to, y’know, worry or be disturbed by my nightmares
junguwu: i’m going to eat my own knees

rabbit(ch): d-don’t do that
rabbit(ch): you need your knees
rabbit(ch): you can ask ten if they’d be bothered if you were to have a nightmare
rabbit(ch): they’re not really the one to lie about that

junguwu: hnng okay
junguwu: they went to get us some snacks so i’ll text them ig, that’s easier

rabbit(ch): do that uwu
rabbit(ch): let me know how it goes!!

junguwu: okie uwu

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[9:09 pm]

junguwu: hey ten

chittaphone: already missing me?
chittaphone: damn i knew you were whipped

junguwu: ksjshs no
junguwu: i mean yeah but that’s not why i texted

chittaphone: do you want me to take anything else or smth

junguwu: hnn no
junguwu: i’m gonna dislocate my shoulder hh

chittaphone: y-you alright there? need any help?

junguwu: no
junguwu: it’s just an expression

chittaphone: i’ve never ever heard that being used as an expression but ok i’ll let it slide

junguwu: i was gonna ask if
junguwu: you don’t mind the fact that i might have a nightmare in the middle of the night
junguwu: i don’t want to bother you
junguwu: so, like, i gotta know whether or not i should go to doyoung and kun, y’know

chittaphone: i don’t mind
chittaphone: we’ve been through it many times, don’t worry
chittaphone: i both know how to deal with you by now and don’t mind it, sweetheart

junguwu: hnn you sure?

chittaphone: of course
chittaphone: anyway i’m coming back and we’re cuddling the heck out of each other because i said so

junguwu: sounds fair enough uwu
junguwu: now get here faster >:( i need a smooch and a Big One

chittaphone: sir this is a mcdonald’s drive through

junguwu: ten
junguwu: i am Begging you
junguwu: do Not

chittaphone: listen, i don’t know how to deal with softness okay
chittaphone: don’t call me out on this

junguwu: Coward.
junguwu: get back here or i’m going to rip my ribs out

chittaphone: DO NOT
chittaphone: i’m honestly scared
chittaphone: why do you hate your bones so much

junguwu: they’re useless

chittaphone: jungwoo please-
chittaphone: i’m gonna teach you human anatomy when i get back istg

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘all the family’]
[10:32 pm]

jong jinrak: what if all of this isn’t real
jong jinrak: what if we’re, like, stuck in a fanfic

tall baby: our story is more than just a fanfic, chenle :(
tall baby: it’s a whole bestseller <3

jong jinrak: no author would write a character like you if they had any dignity
jong jinrak: don’t even try

tall baby: i’d be everyone’s favourite character, shut up

jong jinrak: sounds fake but ok
jong jinrak: you’re not even my favourite character and we’ve been dating

chittaphone: if this is a fanfic, i wanna have a strong talk with the author
chittaphone: do you think they accept constructive criticism
chittaphone: i don’t actually care, all i have to say is let me fucking BREATHE

junguwu: sips popcorn
junguwu: i agree with ten

tall baby: omg sell me some liquid popcorn too
tall baby: i’m even willing to pay and defend ur sales

junguwu: i don’t want to
junguwu: make it yourself, i spent a lot of time learning it

tall baby: you’re just mean

jong jinrak: if this was a fic, jisung would be erased as a character
jong jinrak: we don’t need him

tall baby: why are you so MEAN to me
tall baby: i’m going to marry taeil instead
tall baby: he’ll love me

jong jinrak: i don’t think taeil is into children

moonmoon: i’m not
moonmoon: but be nicer to jisung pls don’t make him cry that scares me

jong jinrak: he sounds like a car alarm sometimes

tall baby: says YOU
tall baby: you once screeched in the middle of the night and i thought you were getting murdered

jong jinrak: it’s what you deserve
jong jinrak:. plus there was a MOTH what did you expect

tall baby: to SWAT IT AWAY
tall baby: NOT MAKE ME THING THAT MY CAR THAT I DON’T OWN IS GETTING STOLEN

jong jinrak: unrealistic, try again
jong jinrak: wait i feel a dark presence approaching

tall baby: the what now

cool dad: sCREECH
cool dad: GO TO SLEEP CHILDREN

tall baby: oh, that

junguwu: listen to kun or i’m going to consume my liver bones
junguwu: cromch

tall baby: haha! i’ve never been as scared in my life as i am now!
tall baby: please don’t do that!

junguwu: cromch cromch cromch cromch

tall baby: chenle i know you hate me but please hold me
tall baby: i’m so terrified

junguwu: This is a nice children’s show, nothing to be terrified of!

jong jinrak: h-hey jisung
jong jinrak: i think we should uh
jong jinrak: we should go to sleep
jong jinrak: g-goodnight please don’t eat your liver bones, whatever they may be

junguwu: only my friendly familiars of course! there’s lennie and reginald and, my favourite one, ollie!

cool dad: jungwoo sweetheart you alright

chittaphone: shh let him talk i’m invested
chittaphone: why is ollie your favourite, how are liver bones special

junguwu: Wouldn’t You Like To Know.
junguwu: ask you own doctor or pharmacist for help!

cool dad: i’m genuinely worried
cool dad: ten pls say that you’re still with jungwoo

junguwu: we’re cuddling
junguwu: unless ten has been replaced by a clone
junguwu: but i’ll always recognize the real ten :)

chittaphone: :)

cool dad: i can’t take this
cool dad: goodnight

chittaphone: :)

Chapter Text

[cool dad created group chat ‘big date uwu’]
[cool dad added here’s Johnald, loselose +3]
[8:21 am]

cool dad: hello
cool dad: we need to continue developing the plot line for the date with ten

here’s Johnald: continue developing the what

cool dad: the plan for the date
cool dad: same thing
cool dad: anyway
cool dad: do you think we should go out or should we go OUT out

here’s Johnald: what’s the difference
here’s Johnald: i’m so confused
here’s Johnald: pls slow down i’m stupid

cool dad: out - to a restaurant
cool dad: OUT out - like a picnic or somewhere outside

here’s Johnald: okay that makes sense
here’s Johnald: i have no idea though it’s like 4 am

cool dad: it’s literally 8:20 am

here’s Johnald: yeah exactly
here’s Johnald: just like i said
here’s Johnald: it’s like 4 am

cool dad: i can’t with you
cool dad: johnny baby that’s literally a four hour difference

here’s Johnald: a 4 hour 20 minute difference ;)

cool dad: i
cool dad: the level of disappointment is visible and audible

junguwu: i have risen from the dead to say that i, too, am very disappointed
junguwu: anyway i’m going back to sleep it’s like 4 am

cool dad: no it’s NOT
cool dad: what time do you all go to sleep

junguwu: an adequate time, therefore i’d like to wake up at an adequate time as well
junguwu: let me sleep until 10:23 am or i’m going to sprain my ankles

cool dad: jungwoo honey,,,, don’t,,,
cool dad: that’s not healthy,,
cool dad: pls don’t hurt yourself first thing in the morning

junguwu: too late, you haven’t let me sleep
junguwu: my ankles are now sprained
junguwu: now to consume them

cool dad: jungwoo i beg of you
cool dad: go back to sleep, don’t consume your sprained ankles

junguwu: what am i going to get for that
junguwu: they’re a good snack

cool dad: m-my love?

junguwu: i can get that either way
junguwu: try more

cool dad: uhhhh if you uh if you consume your ankles um
cool dad: johnny pls help me out uh

here’s Johnald: if you consume your ankles now, you won’t be able to walk to our date

junguwu: hm you have a point
junguwu: i assume the date is anytime in the period of today to next two weeks or so?

cool dad: y-yeah, around that time
cool dad: why do you ask

junguwu: well that’s certainly no bueno!
junguwu: ankles require at least a four week growing period or a three week shipment!

cool dad: see, that’s why you can’t consume your ankles
cool dad: just go sleep it off and i shall provide you with a breakfast of your choice immediately as you wake up

junguwu: i require one full electron, please and thank you, goodnight

cool dad: g-goodnight
cool dad: well this has been a disaster
cool dad: i suppose we can talk about the date later when everyone’s awake
cool dad: i shall go make something for breakfast

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘dreamies and a nightmare’]
[10:23 am]

jong jinrak: i’m going to cut jisung’s legs off
jong jinrak: chop chop chop

tall baby: please Don’t
tall baby: why are you so intent on hurting me

jong jinrak: you tall. me small. chin on shoulder not work.

tall baby: oh, okay, that’s valid
tall baby: you’re allowed then

jong jinrak: :D!!

country boy: i can’t explain on how many levels that is a bad idea
country boy: please do not chop anyone’s legs off

jong jinrak: but jisung allowed me to
jong jinrak: don’t be a buzzkill

nono: yeah mark don’t be a buzzkill
nono: let the kids entertain themselves

country boy: jeno.
country boy: don’t encourage them, i beg of you

nono: mark, with all due respect
nono: i’ll do whatever the Fuck i want

country boy: you’re a horrible influence
country boy: this is why you’re not the responsible one here

nono: as if you are in any way shape or form responsible

country boy: at least i’m NOT LETTING CHILDREN CHOP THEIR LEGS OFF
country boy: i’m going to ask renjun to strangle you next time they see you

nono: they love me more
nono: they’ll strangle you instead

jong jinrak: hey jisung is that flirting
jong jinrak: is that how that works

tall baby: i have no clue
tall baby: i am a Baby, i have not flirted even Once in my Entire Life

country boy: SCREECH
country boy: we’re NOT flirting

nono: we’re not?

country boy: oh fuck off
country boy: i have a weak heart, don’t do that to me

jong jinrak: jisung if you’ve never flirted, how are we dating

tall baby: i think i just kinda spawned and… boom! we’re dating!
tall baby: it just happened and we both went with it

jong jinrak: oh valid

nono: oh mark ;) so you’re saying i’m doing things to your heart?
nono: never knew ;)

country boy: i’m going to
country boy: strangle myself by myself instead
country boy: tell kun and xuxi i love them only
country boy: goodbye.

:D : mark pleathe don’t
:D : also chenle pls don’t chop jisung’s legs off

jong jinrak: ur just being mean
jong jinrak: let me live

:D : wear high heels instead
:D : why does jisung have to suffer

jong jinrak: he AGREED to it

:D : he’s a minor, his opinion doesn’t matter
:D : and urs doesn’t either

jong jinrak: never did i ever think that you’d turn out to be the mean one
jong jinrak: i trusted you…

:D : you’ll thank me when you’re older
:D : just grow, it’s not that hard

jong jinrak: i have never been as disrespected before
jong jinrak: i will make a smoothie out of your shins, yukhei

country boy: i am terrified

jong jinrak: as you should be
jong jinrak: i’m coming for you next

tall baby: chenle love,,, pls don’t
tall baby: you’re already chopping my legs off, why do you intend to hurt others

jong jinrak: why are you ALL AGAINST ME

country boy: because you want to hurt us??????
country biy: chenle i Beg of you,,,

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘big date uwu’]
[11:52 am]

cool dad: am i allowed to text now
cool dad: is no one going to shred their elbows or sip their eyeballs or something if i text

junguwu: who would do such a thing
junguwu: kun, don’t be silly
junguwu: we’re weird but not that weird…

cool dad: i
cool dad: jungwoo sweetie-
cool dad: sits
cool dad: okay then
cool dad: a-anyway
cool dad: are we going on a picnic or to a cafe or staying in someone’s room or

actual angel: i think we should go on a picnic or something and then we can camp out in your room
actual angel: we go to cafes all the time, picnics are Special™

here’s Johnald: what taeyong said
here’s Johnald: plus it’d be hard to fit all of us in a normal cafe

cool dad: oh you’ve got a point
cool dad: okay picnic it is
cool dad: the weather’s gonna be pretty nice in three days, do you think we can go out then?

junguwu: that sounds good
junguwu: i can help with the food

cool dad: jungwoo sweetie i don’t trust you in the kitchen
cool dad: you’ve said you’re going to eat your liver bones one time too many

junguwu: i’ve only said that once

cool dad: exactly, that’s too much for a normal person
cool dad: taeyong, angel, can you help me with the food

actual angel: of course uwu

junguwu: hey now you’re just being mean
junguwu: i wouldn’t share my liver bones

cool dad: you and xuxi can take care of the setup, i’m scared of letting you in the kitchen
cool dad: no offence, jungwoo, love you, bub

junguwu: :(
junguwu: then i’ll just be sad and shatter my knuckles
junguwu: see, i’m handling my problems like any adult would

cool dad: jungwoo i cannot express the level of how much that isn’t an adult way of dealing with problems

junguwu: would a child deal with their problems that way
junguwu: no. no they wouldn’t
junguwu: they aren’t strong enough to shatter their knuckles
junguwu: therefore, by all logic, that’s an adult way of dealing with problems

:D : h-hey jungwoo, love
:D : let’s not do that pls

junguwu: but :((

:D : your knuckles are very nice and pretty
:D : and you need them to function!!
:D : don’t do that

junguwu: you’ve got a valid point…
junguwu: maybe i won’t

cool dad: that’s all it took??
cool dad: wow okay

junguwu: no, it’s because xuxi said it
junguwu: you wouldn’t have convinced me

cool dad: what have i EVER DONE TO YOU
cool dad: why are you so MEAN TO ME

junguwu: hey, you’re the one yelling
junguwu: i’m not doing anything
junguwu: please keep your voice down, i’m fragile
junguwu: i can hear my ribs rattling

cool dad: we’re texting
cool dad: i am in no way being loud

junguwu: well then they’re SCARED
junguwu: and that’s even WORSE
junguwu: you’re causing emotional distress to my ribs AND to me, how dare you

cool dad: i can’t do this
cool dad: i think i’m just too old
cool dad: xuxi how do you handle him

:D : with love
:D : and fear, lots of it
:D : but mostly love

Chapter Text

[private chat with actual angel]
[1:41 pm]

Milky Boy: *insert explosive entrance*
Milky Boy: *insert greeting*

actual angel: what

Milky Boy: who responds to a greeting with what
Milky Boy: taeyong where are your manners

actual angel: jaehyun, sweetie, “*insert greeting*” is not a valid greeting

Milky Boy: are you saying i’m not valid
Milky Boy: i thought you were different…

actual angel: that’s not what i said
actual angel: that’s absolutely not what i said
actual angel: you’re very valid, jaehyun, but your way of texting sometimes,,, not so much

Milky Boy: my way of texting is a part of me
Milky Boy: if you call a part of me invalid, all of me is invalid in your eyes

actual angel: jaehyun,,,,,, No
actual angel: i’m sorry to say this but you’re wrong

Milky Boy: oh so you're calling me dumb then
Milky Boy: that’s not any better

actual angel: STOP TWISTING MY WORDS AROUND
actual angel: you’re absolutely lovely and pretty, and beautiful, and very valid
actual angel: and i can and will fight you if you try to argue with me

Milky Boy: well that’s not fair either
Milky Boy: am i not entitled to my own opinion

actual angel: oh my god,,,
actual angel: how much do i have to pay you so you Shut Up

Milky Boy: how much are you offering

actual angel: like five dollars?
actual angel: idk, however much do you want, i’ll pay anything

Milky Boy: anything? hm
Milky Boy: how about a kith or two

actual angel: one and a half

Milky Boy: one and three quarters and we have a deal
Milky Boy: pls agree i want kith

actual angel: okay
actual angel: but only if you Shut Up

Milky Boy: i’ll only shut up when you give me the kithes
Milky Boy: until that i shall keep talking and talking and talking for a long long time
Milky Boy: i can bullshit my way out of things but i can also bullshit my way INTO things
Milky Boy: hehehehe
Milky Boy: come kith me

actual angel: can i pay later
actual angel: i’m comfy right now

Milky Boy: i will only shut up as a receive the payment
Milky Boy: come be comfy here with me uwu
Milky Boy: i’ll hug u, we can be comfy together

actual angel: you’re so mean
actual angel: i’m going to make jungwoo eat your neurons

Milky Boy: Please Don’t
Milky Boy: not my neurons…

actual angel: then stop being mean to me
actual angel: if you want kith, you come to me

Milky Boy: but :(

actual angel: no free delivery
actual angel: pay me if you want me to come to you

Milky Boy: maybe your sales would be better if you had free deliver smh
Milky Boy: i’m on my way to you

actual angel: you get an extra quarter for your kiss if you come here yourself, i think that’s a great deal

Milky Boy: you’re… Correct
Milky Boy: omw Faster

Chapter Text

[private chat with rainbow demon]
[2:19 pm]

country boy: hyuck help

rainbow demon: finally you message me
rainbow demon: i was wondering when you’d start to panic

country boy: you don't even know what i’m texting you about

rainbow demon: mark lee, i know Everything
rainbow demon: you’re currently panicking over jeno being all confident gay with you n shit, aren’t you
rainbow demon: i know i’m right

country boy: are you a mind reader
country boy: what does he MEAN by it
country boy: is he flirting??? is he just playful??????? help??

rainbow demon: mark, sweetie, stop being Dumb
rainbow demon: of Course he’s Flirting
rainbow demon: that’s obvious, isn’t it

country boy: no??? it’s not?? how do you KNOW??? maybe he’s just joking??

rainbow demon: oh my god you’re as useless of a gay as jisung and that’s saying something
rainbow demon: i haven’t talked to him about feelings but you’re both being so OBVIOUS, it hurts to watch

country boy: what if he thinks that i’m joking and he’s just playing along
country boy: there are so many opportunities
country boy: hyuck bls sned hlep

rainbow demon: stop being a coward and admit you like jeno and he likes you back
rainbow demon: the faster you confess, the faster you two can date

country boy: i’m Never doing that
country boy: if he rejects me, i Will Die

rainbow demon: maybe if you weren’t such a coward i’d help you out
rainbow demon: but you’re the opposite of brave, therefore i’m making you suffer more

country boy: you’re literally the epitome of evil
country boy: what have i ever done to you to deserve that kind of attitude :(

rainbow demon: you Exist and we’re Dating
rainbow demon: that warrants the ability for me to make fun of you as much as i’d like because I Said So

country boy: can i make fun of you too, then

rainbow demon: no, absolutely not
rainbow demon: Blockt
rainbow demon: i’m perfect, you can’t make fun of me

country boy: but i’m pretty good too, aren’t i :(
country boy: i shouldn’t be made fun of that often
country boy: petition for mark lee to get some respect
country boy: oh look, it already has a signature

rainbow demon: that petition is invalid
rainbow demon: wait for my soft hours, then you’ll get love
rainbow demon: now you only get slander and you still love me anyway
rainbow demon: and it’s what i Deserve

country boy: sigh
country boy: can’t argue with that i guess
country boy: you’re valid and i’m not, got it

rainbow demon: go tell it to jeno uwu i’m sure he’ll pat your head and make sure you’re not sad

country boy: BEGONE DEMON
country boy: you’re a horrible influence, why would you make me do that
country boy: all i was asking for was advice in love and i still get slandered

rainbow demon: bold of you to assume i know how love works
rainbow demon: just give it ur best and fuck it up, that’s my love advice
rainbow demon: you can do it, my dude

Chapter Text

[private chat with junguwu]
[4:41 pm]

nana: jungwoo
nana: remember the disaster date in which my partners got me all flustered n shit

junguwu: yes
junguwu: it was an embarrassment to the confident gay society
junguwu: ten and i are still very disappointed

nana: i’m taking them all out one by one
nana: both as in dates and as in a revenge
nana: i’ll start with mark because he’s the easiest target and will get flustered at anything i say
nana: and leave hyuck for the last because he’s my biggest opponent

junguwu: that sounds reasonable enough
junguwu: need any help or did you just decide to inform me

nana: i just wanted to let you know that i’ll make up to my failures as a confident gay and not let anything like that happen again
nana: from this day forward i shall be the one making everyone else flustered instead of someone else making me flustered

junguwu: i trust you, you better be telling the truth

nana: the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth
nana: you have my affirmation

junguwu: hm okay
junguwu: then go ask mark out as fast as you can
junguwu: redeem yourself, child

 

[private chat with country boy]
[4:57 pm]

nana: as the youths now say…
nana: yeehaw, fellow comrade

country boy: jaemin i love you but no one says that
country boy: communism is IN and we’re definitely comrades but no youth says yeehaw, fellow comrade

nana: you’re just old, you don’t know anything
nana: anygay
nana: we’re going on a date on saturday, cancel your plans

country boy: oh worm?
country boy: do i not get a say in that, though
country boy: i’m not allowed to, like, veto your decision or smth?

nana: no because you love me and want to go on a date with me
nana: and you know that i’m right, you’re just afraid to admit it

country boy: i mean
country boy: you’re right
country boy: but i’d still like to have some rights

nana: no
nana: you don’t deserve rights
nana: but that’s okay because i’ll smooch you anyway

country boy: god don’t be nsfw
country boy: but that’s a relief
country boy: how soon can i get that sm**ch

nana: now if you come over
nana: tomorrow, if you don’t

country boy: hmm
country boy: can you mail it to me or would that be too much trouble

nana: sorry big packages cost too much
nana: you’re gonna have to come and receive them in real life, really sorry for the inconvenience
nana: i guess that’s just how life worms
nana: i meant works but y’know, let it worm if it wants to worm, why not

country boy: my life neither works nor worms, i need a new one

nana: your life is just fine, shut up
nana: it’ll worm its way through it, you’ll see

country boy: you really think so?

nana: i’m sure of it
nana: our lives will worm their way through it

Chapter Text

[group chat ‘big date uwu’]
[5:29 pm]

cool dad: who’s going to actually ask ten out on the date?
cool dad: because i don’t think we should inform them that we’re all going to be there and make it as a surprise

junguwu: we could blindfold them and get them to the secondary location
junguwu: and then de-blindfold them and do some confetti or something idk

cool dad: uh i don’t think that’d work, love
cool dad: ten’s kinda paranoid with anything that restricts them in any way, whether it’s their sight, movement or whatever
cool dad: we’ve been through that, trust issues n stuff

junguwu: ohh okay
junguwu: then sicheng could ask ten out on a date?
junguwu: because they’re in kind of an active going-on-dates phase right now
junguwu: so it wouldn’t raise any suspicion n stuff

cool dad: oh you’ve got a point
cool dad: @loselose ask ten out on a date

loselose: huh
loselose: okay
loselose: what day

cool dad: ask them to go out with you on friday
cool dad: you can get some ice cream together at first and then take, like, a walk and slowly make your way to us

loselose: oh that sounds good, alright
loselose: should i ask them now or

cool dad: yeah, so they don’t get any other plans

loselose: alright
loselose: i’ll brb then

 

[private chat with chittaphone]
[5:37 pm]

loselose: we’re going on a date on friday, cancel all your plans, thot

chittaphone: huh
chittaphone: bold of you to assume i ever have any plans but okay

loselose: more details to come

chittaphone: stop being a cryptid
chittaphone: or i can and will slap you

loselose: hot
loselose: can you even reach me though

chittaphone: i am going to blend your shins and drink them as a cocktail, sicheng
chittaphone: and it’s going to be all your fault

loselose: don’t be mean
loselose: i’m just asking a question

chittaphone: you’ve stooped low enough for me to reach
chittaphone: you’re the one that’s mean
chittaphone: you’re bullying me for my height, i couldn’t imagine a more sadistic person than you

loselose: listen,,,,,, i don’t,,, think,,,,,,, that’s quite true,,,,
loselose: like, i don’t think me saying you’re short warrants me being the most sadistic person in the world

chittaphone: i know what i said and i’m standing by it
chittaphone: and you know that i’m right even if you’re too scared to admit it
chittaphone: you’re evil

loselose: no i’m not
loselose: i’m lovely and you know it
loselose: you love me

chittaphone: i can love you but that doesn’t make me think you’re any less evil
chittaphone: evil is hot ;)

loselose: y’know, i don’t think i fully understand you sometimes

chittaphone: oh that’s the beauty of being into me
chittaphone: you never know what you’ll get

loselose: don’t you think
loselose: predictability is a
loselose: good thing? sometimes at least?

chittaphone: no
chittaphone: i’m being exciting uwu
chittaphone: and you love it, don’t even Attempt to lie right now or i will use your kneecaps as a helmet

loselose: i’m scared
loselose: i love it, yes, sure, why not, please don’t take my kneecaps

Chapter Text

[private chat with chittaphone]
[11:29 pm]

junguwu: hi
junguwu: are you still awake?

chittaphone: i’m an insomniac, of course i’m still awake
chittaphone: what’s up, love?

junguwu: uh, can i sleep with you tonight?

chittaphone: sleep as in sleep or sleep as in ;))
chittaphone: ‘cause both work for me ;)

junguwu: skjssj no sleep as in sleep
junguwu: i don’t think it’s gonna be a Great Night for me so yeah
junguwu: speaking about that, uhhhhhhhhhhhhh, i’m ace
junguwu: i’m sorry, i should’ve told you that before

chittaphone: oh that’s okay, thank you for telling me
chittaphone: now come over so i can give you a kith
chittaphone: and we can talk about any boundaries you have and things like that, yeah?

junguwu: yeah (*^o^*)

chittaphone: i’ll come over to you, though
chittaphone: my room’s not nice today
chittaphone: bad energy

junguwu: fair enough
junguwu: come over uwu

chittaphone: you don’t have to answer if you don’t feel like it, but did something happen today to make you feel like you’re gonna have a nightmare?
chittaphone: ‘cause i know you don’t feel like that every day

junguwu: nothing happened
junguwu: i think i’m just still kinda hh about everything
junguwu: plus today i’m just feeling kinda down

chittaphone: sweetheart :(
chittaphone: want to elaborate on the everything or would you rather not?

junguwu: it’s just,,,, Everything
junguwu: mostly, y’know, what happened before between us n shit
junguwu: it’s fine, though, i’ll get my mind to cooperate soon

chittaphone: do you want to talk about that more? get it out there, rant, have a conversation about it?

junguwu: it’s just me being dumb, though
junguwu: there are far better things to talk about

chittaphone: it’s not dumb if it upsets you, woo
chittaphone: i’m not forcing you to talk, you can say no if you don’t want to, but if you only don’t want to talk because you think it’s you being dumb, you should talk anyway

junguwu: hnnnnnngngnnnmn
junguwu: i feel like i’d be making a victim out of myself

chittaphone: it took a mental toll on all of us, sweetheart
chittaphone: you wouldn’t be making yourself a victim
chittaphone: you’re allowed to feel things and you should talk about them

junguwu: h
junguwu: i guess i just still feel guilty
junguwu: as i should, obviously, but it’s just hhh
junguwu: i’m sorry
junguwu: both for being a dick back then and for being dumb now

chittaphone: woo, baby, you’ve already promised that you’ll improve on that front
chittaphone: and i couldn’t wish for more
chittaphone: you’re doing great and you shouldn’t feel guilty, not anymore
chittaphone: i love you

junguwu: i love you more

chittaphone: shh i know better
chittaphone: the fact that you’re willing to change shows that you’re serious about us
chittaphone: and that you understand what was the problem

junguwu: where are you i want kith

chittaphone: almost there, love
chittaphone: and then you’ll get all the kith and more uwu

junguwu: :D!!
junguwu: thank you
junguwu: i feel a bit better now

chittaphone: love you