"The Survey" - an I Love Mummy fanfiction!
Email Survey section adapted, and Fic written by Djehuti.
James tinkered at the computer in his room. He had just finished
homework and was just checking his email and such. He blinked at
the new message in his inbox. It was a survey sent from one of his
friends at school. He was looking over the questions in it, when he
heard his door open.
The sounds of someone munching happily on something as the person
walked across the room told him all he needed to know on who it was.
"Hey Nuff," James greeted his mummy friend, turning in his seat.
Nuff grinned as much as he was able since his mouth was full of
cookies. "Mmmphlo rohl..prmmphtmm"
"Aw jeez, swallow before you say something will ya?" James shook his
head as he brushed the stray crumbs off his shirt.
"Sorry about that Royal Protector..I'm just celebrating by eating
these tasty morsels...Slave Mother must have went to the marketplace
because there is a bountiful amount of food in the kitchen!"
James raised an eyebrow..it always amazed him on how much Nuff could
eat..it seemed like it was all he did sometimes!
Nuff finished off the cookie he was holding and bent down to look
at the computer, kohl outlined eyes squinting as he tried to comprehend
the strange blocky squiggles on the screen. "Doesn't anyone know
how to write in Heiroglyphs? What in Ra's name is that?"
"It's an email survey.." James explained. "People send them to
each other so that they can learn about their friends on the internet."
Nuff nodded, pulling over a stool and sitting. He still didn't really
understand the concept of 'internet' or 'computer' but it still
sounded interesting nonetheless. "I want to do one." He said suddenly.
"If anyone should make their mark apon what you call the internet..it
should be me!"
James snickered. "Right...okay. I'll just ask the questions and you
answer. I'll just type what you say since you don't know how to do
this in English."
Nuff nodded and James leaned closer to the screen. "Okay Nuff, here is
the first question..."
What's your name?
* Nuffratutti, son of Ramses the Second.
* Prince Nuff of Abu Simbel, or just Nuff, Nuff the Great...Nimble
Prince Nuff, The most handsome Pharaoh Nuff, The wise and benevolent
Prince Nuff -- ("Nuff okay I think they get it!" James said as he
smacked Nuff on the arm to shut him up.)
* I died when I was in my late teens. Right now I am about 3,323 years
old. I still look handsome and - (James gave the mummy a warning look)
Okay, next question? (Nuff rubbed his arm sheepishly)
* My sarcophagus is in the attic of this common home. The Slave
family here let me stay with them...It's not much but it will do until
I get to the Golden Palace. (Nuff got a withering look from James
at that) Well it is tolerable since I have friends here...
* Short and black.
* Dark brown, and made up with kohl eye make-up to beautify myself
before the gods. (Nuff struck a pose) I am rather fetching aren't I?
How much do you love your job?:
* If you are referring to my reign as Pharaoh, I enjoyed that
very much! I had lots of slaves to do my bidding and I had everything
a young handsome prince could ever want!
* Abu Simbel, Egypt
* You want me to pick one? I love all kinds of food...peanut butter is
a fascinating substance, pickles, cake..chocolate sweeties...(Nuff
rambled off a few more choices until James bapped him again to quiet
him. "Nuff I can only type so much at once! Sheesh!")
Favorite type of music?:
* I like music that reflects the arabian or Egyptian culture. Some of
the interesting modern pieces I have heard in this modern world aren't
First thing you say in the morning?:
* I usually mumble and don't bother getting up when told to. (Nuff
chuckled at that) I usually threaten to throw whoever woke me up to
What phrase are you known for (your personal catch-phrase)?:
* I have many, but I am always proud to say I am Prince Nuff of Abu
Simbel! You may worship me now!
Do you sleep with a stuffed animal?:
* Of course I do! What Pharaoh doesn't? It is called a Teddy Bear,
how odd...but it is quite snuggly!
What are you wearing at the moment?:
* My linen wrappings of course! What mummy would be without them?
Also I like to wear my Nemes crown, collar and royal skirt. I am also
fond of jewlery and wear arm bands and wrist cuffs and such as well as
my royal sandals.
Coffee or tea?:
* I've had tea before, though I have never had coffee! (At this
Nuff ran to the bedroom door and poked his head out) "Slave mother!
I demand some coffee!" (James shook his head with a sigh)
* I like the sound the crystal on my sarcophagus makes when I
complete a task. It just means I am one step further in reaching the
Croutons or bacon bits:
* Hm...If the strange things which you call croutons are edible,
I will probably like them. As for Bacon -- if that is referring to
the pieces of swine fried in it's own fat...I like that very
Coke or Pepsi?:
* What's that? (James looked at him to explain. "Pop Nuff..")
Ah yes! The strange bubbling substance that causes the stomach to
give voice! That is very interesting stuff...though I don't know
what the difference is between Pepsi or Coke..
Biggest hope for the future?:
* To join my family in the Golden Palace after I finish my tasks..
* That would be the Harvest Festival..the whole family celebrates and
eats as much as they are able...and there is lots of parading, singing
and dancing..(Nuff's eyes lit up at this) Oh, and of course I get lots
Favourite word or phrase:
* Where's a slave when you need one?
* Because I am the Pharaoh that's why! (Nuff raised his chin haughtily
* Lotus blooms
Favourite sport to watch:
* When I was a Pharaoh, I liked to do what I called sand boarding,
though that is unfortunately how I died. Other than that, watching a
good chariot race was fun..
Preferred type of ice cream:
* Chocolate, vanilla...peanut butter...too many flavours to choose
showers or baths?:
* Baths...especially when there is bubbles in it.
Have you ever been convicted of a crime?:
* Me? Prince Nuff of Abu Simbel? I think NOT!
What do you do most often when you are bored?:
* Lay around and watch the little box with moving pictures in it.
Most annoying thing people ask me:
* Why do you wear bandages? Don't they know what a mummy looks like?!
Favourite all time TV show:
* That thing called a movie..I believe it was called Cleopatra. It
made me homesick.
Last Movie you saw and with who?:
* 'The Mummy Returns' with James...how unpleasant! I would never go
around saying 'arrrgh!' How unproper! They should make a movie about
me! I am much more handsome...
Favorite computer game:
* There are games in here? How do they fit? (James laughed as Nuff
poked his head around the computer monitor looking for possible room)
James saved the file and sat back with a sigh. "All done. Supper
should be ready soon.."
As if on cue, his mother called from downstairs. "Supper!"
Nuff bounced up from his seat and practically skipped over to the
door, always excited at the prospect of food. James followed and
turned off the light. He wondered what his friend would think of that
survey as he shut the door behind him...