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How do you have sex ?

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"You tell him!" Dean whispers, pointing his finger aggressively at Sam

“What? No! Come on Dean, please! You did it with me, you can do it with him”

“No! I’m not doing it!” Dean says again, making sure to keep his voice as low as possible. The last thing they need is for the kid to feel guilty.

“Sam? Dean?” Jack calls from his room

“We’re coming!” Sam yells before turning toward Dean “We tell him. Together.”

Dean groans, mumbling about how things were easier before and how he wishes he could go back to sleep. What went so wrong in his life that he ends up giving the talk to Satan’s son after he walked on Sam riding his dick?

“Alright, Jack. What did you see?” He asks, sitting on the chair in front of the bed.

“I-I saw Sam sitting on your penis, and he was… he was yelling” Jack frowns before focusing on Sam “Was he hurting you?”

“No, no Jack, he wasn’t hurting me” Sam hurries to say “It-we-he, uh, you see-“

“What Sammy is trying to say, Jack, is that humans, and uh, some monsters too, actually, have… needs. Sexual needs”

“Sexual? I know that word!” Jack cheers up “But I thought it was only to have children. Are you trying to make a baby together? I don’t think it can work. Unless Sam has a uterus. I know that word, too”

“Fuck me” Dean whispers, rubbing his eyes “No, Sam doesn’t have a uterus. And no, we’re not trying to have a baby. Men can’t get pregnant”

“See, Jack, sometimes… sometimes sex isn’t just about reproduction. It’s about love, and trust, and fun. It can be about a lot of things. It makes you feel good and happy. Like… like when you eat nougats. You love nougat, right?”

“Yeah…” Jack says, thinking about it for a moment “Am I… am I having sex with nougat?”

This time, Dean isn't able to hold back a laugh, which justifies the punch to the arm, Sam gives him.

“No, Jack, you’re not. Sex can be a lot of things, but it… Generally, it involves your… genitals, and other peoples genitals”

“Oh, ok”

“Good” Dean says, clasping his hands “Now that that’s done, let’s go back to sleep”

He starts to push Sam toward the door, hoping to be out of the room as soon as possible, but they don’t reach it before Jack started talking again.

“How do you have sex?”


“Sex. How does it works?”

“Oh boy” Dean sighs, closing his eyes. It’s going to be a long night.

He goes back to his chair, thinking about his next few words.

“You can do a lot of things, to… to have sex. You can fuck-“

“Make love” Sam corrects him

“Yeah, you can make love to someone. It means that you… you put your thing in their thing. Or they put their thing in your thing, depends”

“When you say your thing, what do you mean?”

“Your penis” Sam says “You can put it in their vagina or their rectum, or they can put their penis or… toys, in your”

“Rectum? Really?” Dean whispers, grimacing

“That’s what it’s called” Sam defends himself “Anyway, that’s how you make love to someone. If you do, you need to use protection. That means a condom”

“What is that?”

“It’s… it’s something that you wrap around your penis, so you don’t get a disease or, if you’re with a girl, so she doesn’t get pregnant”

“But I can’t get a disease”

“Kid is right” Dean says

Sam shoots him a blank look and Dean decides to help him out.

“Yeah, but we don’t want you to have baby, do we?”

“Babies are cute” Jack says

“Jack, no” Sam orders “No Baby, got it?”

“Yeah, ok” Jack smiles

“Ok, so, uh, if you… if you want to make love to someone, you need to use lube, alright? Even more if it’s… anal sex” Sam says “And be sure that the other person wants it too, otherwise its rape”

“Ok, I get it” Jack replies “And what is a blowjob?”

“Where did you hear that?” Dean asks, wondering for a moment if he, somehow, forgot to clear his internet browser.

“I heard you asking Sam for a blowjob the other day. Is it sexual?”

Sam shoots him another blank stare, but Dean chooses to ignore it. How could he know that the kid was listening? If he can’t talk about sex in his own house, where will he be able to do it?

“Blowjob, it’s when… It’s when someone take your cock in their mouth, and they… suck it”

“Penis” Sam corrects

“I think we’re past that point, Sammy”

“You suck it? Like a lollipop?”

“Yeah, exactly!” Dean says, happy that his explanation was enough

“But I like to bite on my lollipop, can I do the same?”

“No!” They both say at the same time

“Don’t use your teeth, ever” Dean threated “It’s gonna hurt like a bitch, and I’m not patching up your cock”

“But if I’m with a girl, what do I do? I can’t suck her cock”

“No, but you can…” Dean wants to use the word “eat” really bad, but he knows that it will only confuses Jack even more, and he wants this to end as soon as possible. “You can lick her. Like, her clitoris, and, uh, just, everywhere”

“And girls like that?”

“If you do it right, they do” Dean winks “You can also lick their asses, if they want you to.  You can do that with a girl or a boy”

“But you need to ask them first. For everything, that’s really important Jack”

“Ok, I’ll remember Sam, I promise”

Dean can’t help but smile at Jack's words. He may not be Jack’s biggest fan, but he still loves the fact that Jack cares so much about Sam. He knows that if something happens to him, Jack will stay with Sam. Or at least he hopes.

“How do we know the person enjoyed it? When do I stop?”

“If you’re with a boy, he’s gonna come, and a girl, well, it's almost the same thing, it’s just… wet. Really wet”

“But do I… Swallow it?”

“Whatever you want kiddo. If you want to swallow, swallow.  If you want to spit, feel free to do so”

“Does Sam swallow when he gives you a blowjob?”

“Jack, you don’t have to do whatever I do, ok?” Sam says, his cheeks turning red instantly “You need to make your own decisions. Not just what I like or what I do, ok?”

“So I can swallow or spit?”

“Exactly. And if you both want to, you can even put his cum in his mouth by kissing him”

“Dean!” Sam yells, shoving his brother “Stop that”

“I can’t do that?” Jack asks, a little perplexed

“No, I mean, you can do it, Jack” Sam says “it’s just… there’s a lot of things you can do in the bedroom, Jack, we can’t teach you everything. You need to find out by yourself, ok?”

“Oh, but I don’t want to have sex”

“I’m sorry, what?” Dean says, his eyes wide open

“I don’t want to have sex. I didn’t know what Sam and you were doing, but I don’t want to do it. It seems to be a lot of trouble for nothing. I’m happy when I watch TV and eat candies”

“But why did you keep asking us questions?”

“Because I wanted to know, that’s all”

Dean can feel his blood boiling inside of him, but before he can react, Sam is pushing him out of the room, and Dean can hear Jack telling them goodbye.

“One hour, Sam. One really awkward hour, spent for nothing”

“Yeah, well, at least now he knows a little more about humans” Sam laughs “Come on, let’s go to our room. Maybe you can teach me some things, too?”

Dean sighs. At least the kid knows what he can or can’t do, and that must be something, right?

“Sam, Dean, wait!” Jack yells, running after them

“What now?” Dean groans

“I was wondering, do all siblings have sex together?”

Sam’s face loses all his color, and Dean is almost sure he’s about to pass out, while all Dean wants to do is laugh.

“No, only Sammy and me, ok?”

“Ok” Jack says, apparently satisfied with the answer “Goodnight Sam, goodnight Dean”

“Goodnight kiddo” Dean Laughs, watching as Jack finally leaves them alone “So, you were saying?”

“We need to put a lock on our room”

“Couldn’t agree more, Sammy”