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Playing Favorites

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Titan didn’t have favorites. Of course Titan didn’t have favorites! That would be wrong. Gods and leaders of misguided populace didn’t have followers they liked better than others. Six was just-- Six was just blowing this out of the water. Which was very, very unlike them and probably a sin. If Titan knew--or-or was told that Six had thoughts like this? They would be absolutely done for. They wouldn’t be allowed into paradise to be seated next to Titan and they’d probably just drop off the face of this planet and all the other ones too! Be left to drift meaninglessly through space for eternity until the oxygen in their suit ran out.

But, back to the problem at hand. Titan might have been playing favorites--no, no he wasn’t, but it seemed like the attention he was giving Six was more ample than usual. Perhaps Six had done something wrong, or maybe Titan felt like they weren’t getting enough attention? It  could have been anything, really. Anything but the awful, awful things Six’s mind was making up.

“Incoming call.” Six’s center chest console blurped and they removed it quickly. They held the computer system in their hands and the hologramic screen flickered to life. Across the blue tinted screen, the words TITAN CALLING made Six’s heart race. The patch on the side of their uniform blinked, alerting them that their heart rate had changed. Goodness.

Six accepted the transmission and Titan’s voice came through clearly, “Hello, Six.” It was always strange to Six that Titan didn’t sound godly or powerful, but like a regular being. When they had first talked after Six had been accepted into the elites, Six was amazed with how… average his voice seemed to be.

“Hello, sir.” Six greeted, doing their best to act casual. Titan was just a person. A person that was god. Don’t freak out, Six, don’t freak out.

“Heart rate registered at 100 beats per minute!” Six’s BPM patch chirped. They wondered if Titan could see them blushing.

“Doing some exercise?” Titan asked them, amusement in his voice.

“No, sir.” Six had considered lying, but they knew it was against Titan’s entire practice.

“Very well. Have you any information for me this evening?” Titan asked, “I received the mail you had delivered--my followers are extremely dedicated, aren’t they?”

“Of course! Why wouldn’t they be? You’re amazing.”

Titan laughed his regular person laugh, “I’m only as amazing as those that represent me.” he left room for silence. Room for Six to over think the comment. Room for-- “So, is there anything else I should know? Important dates?”

“You have an assembly in two weeks.” Six said off the top of their head, “Have you written your speech?”

“I have a few drafts. I was hoping to run them by you.” Titan paused again. Why did he always pause to let Six think about what he had said? He did like watching them squirm? Did Six like having someone control them like this?

“By me ?” Six asked, “It would be an honor to hear your speech, sir.” Six was nearly salivating. Ears perked up and tail wagging like some lovesick puppy dog. They were so pathetic. Not worthy of Titan’s attention. Not worthy of Paradise.

“Did you hear me, Six?” Titan asked.

Six blinked, shaking themselves from their daze, “Sorry, sir. I was distracted for a moment. What did you say?”

“I said I’ll stop by in a few hours so you can give me your opinion.” Titan said, “Will you be free?”

Would they be free? What sort of question was that? Six was never too busy for Titan. Six didn’t even have a life outside of Titan.

“Of course, sir! I look forward to seeing you!”

Titan sounded like he was smiling, “I look forward to seeing you, too.” the transmission ended.

Six let themselves blush fully. They tried to push the sinful thoughts from their head about having Titan to themselves for a few hours. Nothing was going to come of spending all this time thinking about something that wasn’t going to lead anywhere. They slid the center chest computer back into its slot on their suit and took a look around their Titan provided home.

It was clean, as usual. Clean enough for Titan. Clean enough to be next to god. But still…

Six got up. They approached their broom and dragged it across the floors, sweeping up nothing, then depositing it into a trash bag. They mopped next, washing the floors they had already washed that day. They nearly did laundry, too, of nothing but a single dish towel before there was a knock on their door.

“Heartbeat registered at--” Six turned their BPM monitor off and went to the door, stopping in the mirror first. They tucked their hair behind their ears, straightened their back, then opened the door to face Titan.

Oh, Titan Above, Six was so weak for him.

He was a bit taller than Six, having to duck under the doorway to come inside when Six finally stopped staring long enough to invite him in.

“H-have a seat wherever you’d like!” Six closed the door behind him, “Do you want anything to drink or eat? It’s about dinner time. Have you eaten?”

Titan sat on the couch, where he usually sat when he came over--which wasn’t often enough to think anything of! Titan did this with all the Elites, right? Right.

“I haven’t eaten, but it’s quite alright. I assume you already have, yes? It’s about thirty minutes past the regular feeding schedule.”

“I’ve eaten.” Six admitted, “But I have leftovers, if you want them. I could also make you something. It’s no trouble at all.”

“Just come sit with me.” Titan patted the seat next to him and Six’s heart swelled to the size of a million balloons and took skyward.

“Yes, sir.” they loved saying that. They would say it over and over and over and--

“The sooner the better, Six.” Titan said, amused.

“Of course! I apologize.” Six took the seat next to him. They felt like they were sunbathing, sitting this close to something glowing . It was making them woozy.

“What’s gotten into you, Six?” Titan asked, “Are you not feeling well? Am I working you too hard?”

Six laughed it off, “Not hard enough, sir.”

Titan waited ten agonizing seconds before he spoke, “Very well. Would you like to read my speech?”

Six imagined their next words came out a lot like, Oh, Titan, I’d love to read your speech! Every night I have dreams like this where you come over and ask me for help and you call me your little mouse and tell me I’m your favorite follower and grant me a special place in Paradise right next to you.

“I’d love to!” Six clapped their hands together, excited.

Titan took a folded up paper from his pocket and handed it over, “Old school writing style.” he remarked about himself.

“Paper has its uses!” Six reminded him, cheerfully. They felt as if they would explode from all the positive feelings they were experiencing.

As they unfolded the paper, a fantasy played out in their mind of seeing that Titan had written them a love letter just for their eyes. Maybe he’d written something romantic and heartfelt and he’d sweep Six off their feet like they always wanted.

The inside of the paper wasn’t mushy at all. Lines of neatly written text about the state of the universe laid inside the paper and Six’s heart sank, only to remember that they were doing Titan a service. They scanned the paper once, then twice.

“It’s perfect.” Six handed it back. They really meant it. Titan had a way with words that had the ability to win anyone over. He was truly magnificent.

“Oh, come now. You can be open with me. I want your honest feedback.” Titan said, “Show me how you’d read it. You have excellent stage presence. I could learn a thing or two from you.”

This time, Six really did blush; palms sweating. They were lucky their heart monitor was off.

“O-oh, I’m not that great. But thank you. I can read your speech aloud, however. Ahem.” Six cleared their throat and stood up, assuming their speech position. Titan folded his hands politely, smiling at them with his eyes.

Six began speaking, starting off nervous. The more they spoke, however, the more they got used to performing. Performing for Titan was one of Six’s greatest pleasures. Oh, if Titan had known they had thought something so vile, he would have ended their life right here. Or maybe he wouldn’t have.

When Six finished reading the speech, Titan clapped, “Excellent work, Six. I might just have you deliver it in my place.”

“I’m afraid the people will be disappointed, sir. They love you.” Six laughed to mask their embarrassment.

“So I’ve heard. Thank you for helping me, Six. I appreciate your dedication.”

Six held back a sigh of content, “Any time!” The cartoon hearts in their eyes were probably painfully obvious.

There was a beat of terrible silence and Titan huffed, leaning forward to sit up, “I should get going. Long day tomorrow.”

They wanted to persuade him to stay, but there wasn’t a reason for him to. He had come to show Six his speech and that was all. And now he was going to leave.

“I’ll show you out.” Six rose to their feet gracefully, waiting for Titan to stand. They guided Titan to the door and opened it.

Titan stood in the doorway, facing Six, “Farewell, Six.”

“Farewell, Titan.” Six replied. They longed to hug the god goodbye, to feel his skin, or have something to remember him by.

When Titan didn’t leave directly after, Six spoke to fill the air, “Off to show the other Elites your speech?” Did that sound bitter?

“Huh?” Six had never caught Titan off guard before, “No. I’ve only shown you my speech. Do I detect jealousy? How unlike you.”

Oh, Six was definitely blushing now, “N-no! I’m sorry. I just--I’m not jealous. I’m sorry if it seems that way.”

Six hated when Titan was quiet. They hated thinking about what they said and trying to figure out how Titan was going to reply. They hated being left in the dark. They hated--

“‘You can be the moon and still be jealous of the stars.’” Titan said, “Anyway, I should go. See you, Six.”

“See you.” Six replied, cheeks on fire. Titan retreated out of the door and Six waited a few moments until they closed it.

“Ugh!” Six nearly yelled as soon as the door closed, “You’re such an idiot, Six! ‘Are you going to show the other Elites your speech?’” they mocked themselves, “Could you be any more obvious ?” They walked themselves to the couch and plopped down, feeling sorry for themselves, “What next? Are you going to throw yourself at him? Pathetic.”

There was a knock at their door again and they got up, sighing. They were not in the mood to see anyone else. They wanted to take a nap for eternity and wake up once they were in Paradise.

They opened the door, not bothering to put on their peppy personality. Being at home was their off time.

“What.” Six opened the door, ice in their voice.

Titan stood before them once again, surprised by their tone, “Six?”

Six was ready for death right now. They jumped, “T-titan! Hi, again. What do you need?”

“I left my speech.” Titan said, “Are you alright?”

“Peachy!” Six was over-acting, but it was fine, “I’ll get your speech.” Six walked to the couch, leaving the door open. They grabbed the paper from the coffee table and returned, handing it over, “Here you go.”

Titan took the paper and their hands touched briefly. Sparks flickered between them on Six’s side.

“Thank you.” Titan said, “I apologize for the--”

“Don’t apologize to me. I should be apologizing to you. I didn’t mean to address you so coldly a moment ago. I’m sorry.”

“You’re allowed to have bad days.” Titan said, “I hope you wake up tomorrow refreshed.”

“The same to you, Titan, sir.” Six said.

Titan left once more, but this time, when he was halfway down the drive, he turned back, “By the way, Six, I think it would do you some good to be quieter when you’re scolding yourself.”

If Six died right now, it wouldn’t be soon enough.