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A Couple of Dumbasses

Chapter Text

Cable groaned and shut his eyes tighter.

Unfortunately but predictably, it didn’t block out the music playing in Wade’s room on the other side of the wall.

He reached for his phone and looked at the time.

00:42.

He cursed himself for agreeing to share an apartment with Wade, Wade for being the most inconsiderate roommate ever, and Domino for providing them with said apartment in the first place; the girl had won the lottery so many times that she would be a billionaire by now if she didn’t keep giving her money to charities and friends in need.

Cable got out of bed and put his black briefs on, teeth bared, ready to yell at Wade to fucking let him sleep.

But Wade’s door was ajar and what the cyborg saw through the crack made him freeze on the spot.

The guy was dancing in front of the mirror, flank turned to him, wearing what looked like… a red lace nightie. The dress was so short it barely covered his ass.

Ass that was clad in matching red panties.

Cable released the breath he didn’t realize he had been holding in and the air poured shakily out of his parted lips. Anger and reason slipped out of him as well.

Hypnotized, he stayed behind the door and watched the mercenary’s hands as they roamed over the red fabric. It was so tight on his muscled chest that he could see his nipples perking up from where he was standing.

But what really caught Cable’s attention was Wade’s smile.

He had never seen him smile that way.

He was singing – horribly wrong – and swaying his hips to the rhythm of the song – surprisingly well – and he looked happy.

Cable felt like he was observing an entirely different person. Or perhaps was he seeing Wade for the first time, as he truly was? No mask, no jokes, only confidence and joy.

The mercenary sang into an imaginary microphone, making pouty faces to his reflection.

“I love myself, I want you to love me

When I feel down, I want you above me”

His left hand slid down his belly, past his navel, all the way down to his crotch. Cable quickly averted his eyes, heart pounding in his chest.

“I search myself, I want you to find me

I forget myself, I want you to remind me”

When he dared to look at Wade again, it turned out that he wasn’t touching himself like he had initially thought.

Or rather he was touching himself, but it wasn’t sexual at all; his hands were back to everywhere but his – flaccid – cock.

And that somehow made Cable feel worse than if Wade was masturbating.

The cyborg silently retreated into his room and closed the door behind him. He lay down on his bed and covered his heated face with both of his palms.

There was an insisting heaviness in his briefs, begging for attention.

He cursed. What the hell was wrong with him?! His mentally-ill roommate was innocently enjoying himself and he got hard from peering at him in the shadows like a fucking creep.

Now that he was thinking about it, he had never seen Wade use a mirror before that night. Hell, he didn’t even know he had one in his room. The guy usually avoided them like the plague, except when he had to take out a bullet or knife stuck in his back...

Cable lowered his hands and muttered “Jesus” as the realization hit him.

It was Wade’s only way to bear the sight of his body.


Wade blew a kiss to the sky. “For you, Ness, hope you liked the show!” He tugged lightly at the red nightie and giggled. “You were right, I feel like a whole new girl in this.”

He turned off the music, then the light. Took off his clothes, room only lit by the headlights of the cars passing down the building, and carefully hung them in his closet.

Naked, he climbed into his bed and got under the covers. He clutched his unicorn plush, bracing himself for what he knew was inevitably coming.

Every night, no exception, since… forever, actually. He didn’t remember exactly when it started. Shitty childhood, Weapon X, losing Ness… The list went on and on and on.

All he knew was that as soon as his mind wasn’t occupied, it wandered into the darkest, scariest places.

Traumatown. Griefville. Hopeless City.

He hated how fast his mood would change. How short-lived the good feelings always were.

The higher he felt, the lower he fell.

As he had said in the first movie, “life was an endless series of train-wrecks with only brief, commercial-like breaks of happiness."

And this one break was already over; a song only lasted so long and he had already bothered Cable enough, judging from the absence of snoring in the other room.

So Wade clenched his jaws and let it happen.

Anxiety weighed him down, loneliness crushed him into the mattress. Memories came rushing back, colors too bright, voices too loud inside his head.

He curled into a ball and sobbed.

“I miss you so much…” 


The next morning, Cable walked into the kitchen after a shower, wet hair dripping on his khaki t-shirt.

Strangely, Wade was already up. He was sitting at the table, scrolling on his phone with one hand and sipping coffee with the other.

The cyborg squinted. Opposite the mercenary was a plate with a stack of pancakes on it, complete with blueberries and maple syrup.

“What the hell?” Cable croaked.

“Pancakes, made with love by yours truly,” Wade explained. He was wearing plain gray pajamas and pink bunny slippers. Cable wondered if he still had the red panties underneath and almost punched himself for even thinking about it.

As if he hadn’t thought about it all night.

“Why?!” he interrogated Wade as if he had committed a heinous crime.

The guy looked up at him, startled. “Huh… roommate etiquette?”

Cable made a skeptical, disgruntled noise and sat down.

He needed to control himself.

“Wow, someone got up on the wrong side of the bed this morning,” Wade said, studying him over his mug.

“And someone’s gonna get a fork to the brain if they don’t shut up.”

So much for control , Cable sighed internally. He tried eating a piece of pancake and, to his surprise, it was absolutely delicious.

“I love our banters. Told you we’d become the bestest pals!” Wade exclaimed, waving his finger at him.

It took Cable a few seconds to swallow the huge portion of pancake he had stuffed his face with before he could reply: “It was a genuine threat. And we’re not “pals”. We’re nothing .”

It came out a lot colder than he had meant it. He caught a glimpse of hurt pass over the mercenary’s face, quickly replaced by a nonchalant, shit-eating grin.

“Silly me, thinking I owed my roommate pancakes for making some noise last night but since we’re nothing , nothing gets…” He took the still half-full plate out of Cable’s hand. “… nothing .”

The cyborg stared at him in disbelief.

He… had wanted to apologize to him? He had cooked pancakes for him ? Scratch that, he had cooked for him? The guy who only ate tacos and chinese?

Guilt overwhelmed Cable, rising up in his throat like vomit.

A feeling he had become way too familiar with, lately.

Wade took advantage of Cable’s stunned confusion to seize his fork and ate the remaining pancakes while maintaining defiant eye contact.

Cable’s gaze strayed towards his scarred lips, shiny and sticky from the syrup. A pink tongue darted out of them to lick it off.

Out.

He needed to get out.

The cyborg stood up and stormed out of the kitchen. “Whatever, your pancakes taste like shit anyway!” he shouted over his shoulder.

He slammed the front door shut so hard its frame cracked.

Chapter Text

“Mh. Mm-mmh-mMH-mmh-mh-mh,” Wade said, mouth full.

He swallowed and repeated “What. In the shitfuck was that.”

Cable couldn’t be that worked up about music at 1 a.m., could he? It wasn’t even late according to mercenary standards. It was actually the beginning of their shift. Yeah, killing people in broad daylight was less practical. And less cool.

But Cable was old as dirt. Old people like to go to bed early, right?

Wade nodded, satisfied with his explanation, and finished the pancakes before putting the plate in the sink. Cable would wash it since he hadn’t cooked; it was one of the boring, “you better follow ’em, dipshit” rules he had established as a condition of living with Wade and it was about time it applied to him too.

Wade threw himself on the couch and turned on the TV to watch an episode of Queer Eye.


Cable walked around the neighborhood to calm his nerves, looking so pissed off that every passerby stepped aside on the sidewalk, like Moses parting the Red Sea.

He’d forgotten to cover his metal arm in his hurry, but no one seemed to mind. Cable tsk’d. People’s carelessness about every goddamn thing they weren’t directly involved in was exactly what fucked the world to the point of no return. Would fuck, actually.

He sighed. Time was a blur. Four days ago he was holding his dead family in his arms. Today his wife wasn’t even born yet.

And last night he had considered betraying her memory.

Suddenly feeling nauseous, he sat on a bench in a park and focused on the scenery to stop his stomach from lurching.

But everything he saw made him feel even more out of place, out of time. And reminded him of what he had sacrificed, what he would never have again.

Kids playing together. Moms pushing their baby in a stroller. Joggers running past him with their dog. Entire families having lunch in the grass, lying cozily on a blanket.

Across the street from starving, homeless people sleeping on cardboard.

Now that was familiar. How fucked up was he that he found the sight of misery comforting?

He got up and dropped ten bucks in their cup. He couldn’t give more because he still had groceries to buy and he was reluctant enough to use Wade’s money.

Wade.

On his way back to the apartment, Cable stopped to get two pizzas. It was the least he could do after his outburst, and the most he could do without using words. He’d never been good with them.

“Two margheritas, one with extra pineapple and olives,” he ordered to the Italian guy who looked at him like he had just grown a second head. “I know, it’s gross. Just do it, please.”

Balancing groceries and pizza boxes on one arm, Cable knocked on the front door but Wade didn’t come. So he tried opening it with his left elbow and... yep, the forgetful dumbass hadn’t closed it since morning.

He was ready to scold the mercenary when he saw him curled up on the sofa, sniffling and hugging a box of tissues. There was some sort of makeover show on TV.

“You alright?”

He winced at the concern in his voice.

Wade jumped and quickly glanced at him before blinking his tears away. “Me? Peachy. Smells great, did you get pizza?!”

Cable laid the boxes on the table in front of Wade instead of replying and put the groceries away. He grabbed two beers from the six-pack and came back to sit on the couch, as far away from Wade as possible.

The mercenary was still staring at the pizza on his knees.

“You’re supposed to eat it, not look at it,” Cable said.

“Pineapple and olives… you remembered!” Wade exclaimed, a huge smile on his dumb face. It was so close to the one he had last night that Cable had to look away. “You can’t forget atrocities,” he muttered.

Wade took a bite and moaned loudly. The cyborg felt his dick twitch. He closed his legs.

“I accept your apology.”

Cable frowned, a slice of pizza midway to his open mouth. “My what?”

“Your apology,” Wade repeated, gesturing to his pizza. “Or was it a proposal? Because if it was, I’m signing our marriage license right now.”

Cable huffed, reluctantly amused. “Dream on.”

After that, they ate in silence as they watched Queer Eye. At the end of the episode, when the nominee was presenting his new self and house to his family and friends, Wade started tearing up again.

Cable scoffed at him. “How can you cry at that, everything’s staged! There’s even sad music playing in the background.”

Wade looked at him in horror. “How can you NOT cry at that?! Do you have a metal heart too?!”

“I don’t know. Guess I’ve used all my tears for real stuff. Like war. And death.”

“You’re such an edgelord.” 

“Fuck you.”

And just like that, another silence fell on them. It wasn’t tense or awkward. At least for Wade; he seemed to have forgotten Cable’s very existence.

When the mercenary had finished his pizza and beer, he put his arms in the air and stretched, his pajama top rising to show a sliver of mottled skin. Cable couldn’t help but look from the corner of his eye.

“Can we cuddle? I feel like cuddling,” Wade said out of nowhere.

Cable choked on his last slice of pizza and chugged his Budweiser can to recover. “Touch me and I’ll cut your hands off,” he growled a little breathlessly.

“That is such a you answer. I’m tempted to try but I need both hands for what I’m about to do.”

The cyborg squinted, every muscle in his body tensed, ready for fight or flight. He felt like he was falling into a trap when he asked  “And what’s that?”

“Rubbing one out!” Wade announced cheerfully. He took the box of tissues and stood up.

“Ugh, you don’t have to share that!” Cable shouted at the mercenary as he disappeared into his bedroom. At least the asshole had the decency to close the door.

Wait, why would he need two hands to… Oh.

Oh.


Ha! You should have seen the old grump’s face when he’d said that. Mortified!

As if he didn’t jack it. … Did he? What if he had a metal penis, or worse… erectile dysfunction?! Wasn’t he, like, half a century old? Yeah. Definitely the second one. Poor guy. Aging is cruel.

Wade had to rub this one reaaal good in the honor of his fallen comrade.

So he put his me-time playlist on and rummaged in his nightstand to retrieve his vibrator and lube. He stripped down and got under the covers, humming joyfully as he uncapped the bottle of lube.

Legs spread apart, he stroked his semi hard cock with his right hand and reached behind his balls with his left one, circling his hole with his index finger. He teased himself for a while, then breached in with a sigh.

His brain had the neat idea of conjuring a memory of Vanessa blowing him as she fingered him open; he quickly shut it down, replacing it with painless, unattainable fantasies.

Bea Arthur. Unicorns. The Olsen twins. Colossus. Metal. Blood.

Ok maybe not that painless.  

He moaned at the mental picture and grabbed his vibrator, setting it on the first speed.


Cable was sitting so stiff on the couch that he could have been mistaken for a marble statue. He had frozen as soon as he had recognized the song.

He tried to ignore his arousal with all his might, but he just couldn’t. His mind was full of red lace on scarred skin, soft fabric on taut muscles.

He didn’t want to listen but he did. Closely.

And he heard nothing except 80s music.

What could Wade be doing? Was he really touching himself, this time? Would he risk staining his red panties? Was he even wearing them? That would be impractical, they were very tight-fitting...

Both hands. Was he using his fingers or a dildo?

Cable’s frustrated curiosity eventually got the better of him; he left the TV on as a backup plan and tiptoed to Wade’s door, hating himself more with every step.

He pressed his ear against the cheap wood panel and closed his eyes, adrenaline coursing through his veins.

Then, between two verses, he heard it.

A moan.

It was rougher and lower than Wade’s usual tone. Eager and impatient. 

Cable’s jaw dropped, all of his blood running south. His right hand followed it and slid under the waistband of his briefs, tightening around the base of his cock.

He bowed his head and pressed it harder against the door, straining to hear any sound. In the few seconds of silence before the next song, he perceived a faint buzzing.

He swore under his breath.  Oh, so you’re using a vibrator, you dirty-

Another moan, this one closer to a whimper as the buzzing sound became louder. With a grunt, Cable unbuckled his belt and pulled himself out of his pants, pumping his now fully hard cock rapidly.

He hated how close he already was, how clearly he could imagine Wade’s face as it distorted with pleasure, his mouth opened in a silent “O”.

A few moments later, he heard the bed creak and a strangled cry.

He spilled all over his fist, biting his lip so hard that he drew blood.


Wade clenched down on the vibrator as he came, arching his back until it lifted off of the mattress. He felt his cum spurt over his belly and pool in his navel, mind going haywire in his orgasm. Among the nonsensical mental pictures it played behind his eyelids was one of Cable snarling at him, pupils blown wide.

It made his dick jerk one last time, vibrator still going strong against his prostate. Wade gasped and quickly removed the sex toy, trembling from overstimulation.

He slumped onto the bed and stared at the ceiling.

“What.”

Chapter Text

The fuck was that, triple W? You’re gonna grant Cable a free pass to your backstage because he bought you pizza?! That’s just sad, even for you, Wade thought as soon as his brain had come back online.

Which was too soon, always.

He wiped off his cum and excess lube with a couple of tissues before throwing them on the floor and laying his vibrator on the bedside table.

Back to staring at the ceiling. Was that a spider? Ew.

He should really get up to clean both himself and the toy but he could hear water running in the bathroom. Hadn’t Cable showered this morning already?

Weird.

But not as weird as picturing your enemy-turned-buddy-slash-roommate dicking you. Or stabbing you. Whatever it was Cable was doing to him in that orgasm-induced vision.

Wade sighed, rolling on his left side. He didn’t want to think about it anymore. To be completely honest, he didn’t want to think at all.

He was feeling satiated in every sense of the word and so, so sleepy.

When in doubt, take a nap, he thought as he closed his eyes.


Cable looked at the mess he had made and felt his heart drop in his chest.

Translucent white stains right in front of Wade’s door, painfully obvious on the brown hardwood flooring.

He cursed in an exhale, tucked himself back in and rushed to the bathroom, mortified at the idea of the mercenary coming out of his room and stepping into his cum. He came back with a few sheets of toilet paper and cleaned it up as fast as he could.

Thankfully, the door remained closed. There was no sound on the other side and Cable wondered if Wade had heard him. Perhaps he had simply fallen asleep.

He prayed to any listening god that it was the second option.

He locked himself up in the bathroom and gripped the sink, staring at his reflection. A strand of hair had fallen out of his usually tamed haircut and his face was flushed a dark tint of red.

The color of shame, he groaned as he stripped down to take a cold shower.

He closed his eyes and let the water flow down his neck and back, hands braced against the sky blue tiles.

Mind reeling.

What the hell was happening to him? He didn’t recognize himself anymore; he was acting like a teenage stalker, getting off on any intimate glimpse of his roommate he could get.

And the idiot had no idea.

Cable balled his fists.

It’s all your fault, asshole. Ever since the prison I can’t get you out of my head, you’re stuck there like an obnoxious song, nagging at me.

Rage seethed inside him but he knew damn well it wasn’t directed at Wade as much as it was directed at himself.

He grabbed the soap and scrubbed a little harder than necessary.


“The coast is clear!” Wade said playfully after he had made sure the corridor was empty.

As he crossed it, carrying his vibrator wrapped in a dirty t-shirt because you can never be too cautious, he noticed that Cable’s door was open, which was quite outside of the cyborg’s habits.

And by ‘quite’, he meant ‘totally’; Cable always kept it closed even if he wasn’t in his room. One could think the futuristic soldier had something to hide.

… Did he like to dress like a girl too?

Wade imagined him in his nightie and laughed so hard he wheezed. Tears still prickling his eyes, he peeped inside the bedroom; no silhouette on the bed, or anywhere else for that matter. Only darkness and silence.

He frowned.

Where could the old grump be at 10pm? Wasn’t he supposed to be tucked in bed, dentures floating in a glass on his bedside table?

Wade was tempted to go in and play with the guns he knew Cable kept under his bed but the memory of the cyborg’s graphic threat if he did so was enough to deter him.

He had blown himself up with 1,200 gallons of high-test fuel in the recent past, yet he wasn’t sure his body could recover from that.

So he took a hot shower instead, cleaned himself thoroughly, and accidentally masturbated once more in the process. Hey, don’t judge! You would too if you had a healing factor that gave you the sex drive of a rabbit on cocaine as a side effect. It was just like Shakira said: whenever, wherever…

He was still humming the catchy song fifteen minutes later when he walked into the kitchen to grab something to eat, towel wrapped loosely around his waist.

The problem was there was nothing to eat. Well, nothing that wouldn’t require preparation that Wade had no skills nor patience for. Cable apparently hadn’t cooked supper, or he hadn’t left him any of it.

However, he had finished the six-pack of beer on his own; the four cans were methodically lined up on the counter, hand-crushed to the point that they were basically silver saucers.

It was a tad bit creepy, not gonna lie.

Wade opened the fridge again, hoping it would this time magically contain a lasagna dish and a post-it note with 'idiot' written on it. In his mind, there were two little hearts instead of points on the ‘i’s.

But there was no heart anywhere in the apartment.

His had died with Vanessa, and Cable’s had apparently stayed in the age of the 1,987th Sharknado.

He did it for me, though, Wade thought, nodding to himself. He closed the refrigerator and just stood there, in the middle of the big, immaculate kitchen.

Getting smaller and smaller.

Everything in the apartment felt fake and foreign without the familiar sights and sounds of Cable’s presence, as if Wade had somehow fallen into an IKEA catalog and couldn’t get out.

He was home alone, minus the home and burglars to trap.

He did it for me, Wade repeated, hands twitching nervously by his sides.

Right?


Cable came back much later that night, staggering in the doorway.

His heavy, irregular footsteps immediately caught Wade’s attention as he was talking on the phone, feet up on the couch. He was wearing his suit, mask included, because it always helped him get into the merc mindset.

Not like he needed to get into a particular mindset to kill people. It just looked more professional.

There, he’d said it.

“Gotta go, send me the details, Weas’,” he said before hanging up. He got off the couch just in time to see the cyborg’s heel disappear into the bathroom. “Hey! No ‘hello’? Did manners go extinct with the polar bears in the future?” he yelled after him.

No answer.

Tap opening, water running.

A grunt.

Wade recognized that low, throaty sound; Cable had made it plenty of times when Wade was kicking his ass back at the Ice Box.

All right, here goes nothing, the mercenary thought as he joined the cyborg in the bathroom, expecting a knife up close and personal with his body in the next five seconds.

Turned out it was Cable’s body that had taken a knife; the man was hunched over the sink, cleaning a short but deep gash just over his navel.

The cut was barely visible, lodged between two of Cable’s surprisingly ripped abs.

Abs that were contracting rhythmically from the pain and covered with a fine sheen of sweat.

Wade’s mouth went dry.

“Mind your fucking business,” Cable growled, glancing at him with his shiny eye.

“No can do, I need to take you to the hospital, Brolin,” Wade replied after a slight time lag.

Because damn.

“No.”

Okay, that sounded definitely more animal than human.

Yes, dicktip. You’ll bleed out. At least get a mean infection that will kill you too. I worded that wrong: my point is, you’re gonna die, unless you come with me.”

Cable glowered at him before he took his black t-shirt all the way off, wincing as it passed over his head, and holy mommy fucking shit?!

“See why I don’t wanna go?” Cable said, extending his arms in an are-you-not-entertained pose.

Which made his biceps, both metal and flesh, bulk up ridiculously hard.

“I-I-I huh… see, I definitely see...,” Wade stuttered.

Something I like and probably shouldn’t, he completed mentally.

Because what he was seeing was an impressive amount of metal wires digging into tanned skin. He had always thought Cable only had a metal arm like the Winter Soldier, but most of his left side was in fact affected, metal curling around his hip bone and devouring his flank and back.

He remembered Cable had a face and looked back at it, trying to regain composure. Thank George he still had the mask on.

“Listen: I’m sure they’ve seen worse. It’s New York, after all.”

Cable made a doubtful noise, and turned back to the mirror. Fuck, even his spine was robotic. He pressed a new bandage to the wound and threw the other blood-soaked one into the trash can, lifting the lid telekinetically.

Without clothes to hide them, Wade was able to see just how well metal and flesh worked together, metal muscles mimicking flesh ones, whirring softly with each move.

He could get used to this sweet robotic music.

There’s an emergency, Deadpool. Focus!

He shook like a dog to clear his mind and exclaimed as soon as the idea hit him “I know! If you come with me right now, I’ll tell you the most embarrassing reason I’ve ever had to go to the hospital.”

Cable stopped rummaging through the cabinet to look at him, clearly tempted by the offer but unsure if he could trust the mercenary’s word.

One eye flaring, the other glazing over, as if only one of them was allowed to reveal the cyborg’s exhaustion.

Wade raised his non-eyebrows insistently, trying to convey as much honesty as he could, and, not to be too self-deprecating, but it wasn’t a lot.

Against all odds, Cable surrendered with a deep sigh.

“Deal.”

Chapter Text

Wade opened the door of the taxi and dropped Cable on the backseat as gently as possible, before going around to sit next to him.

“To the hospital, Dopinder!” he ordered, pointing his gloved finger straight ahead.

“Oh my- yes, Pool Sir!” the Indian said, trying to look anywhere but the menacing soldier bleeding out in his car while glowering at him.

The taxi took off and knocked down a trashcan in doing so, tires screeching on the asphalt.

Wade turned his attention back to Cable. It was definitely the right time for an accusing ‘I told you so’.

“I told you not to wear your fanny pack outside at night or the local douchebags would get the wrong idea!”

“What wrong idea?” Cable replied through gritted teeth.

“That you’re from Brokeback Mountain?”

Cable frowned, his lips pursing into a budding ‘what the fuck does that even mean?’. Wade sighed and clarified impatiently “That you’re gay? Jesus, I bet you even had your shawl on.”

“It’s a tactical desert scarf,” Cable corrected. “And what if I were?”

Wade blinked repeatedly behind his mask, struck silent for the first time in forever. Cable was staring at him with the intensity of his futuristic gun set on 11, face otherwise undecipherable.

He was kidding him, right? Well, two can play this game...

Wade snapped out of his surprise to lay a compassionate hand on the older man’s knee and wipe away a non-existent tear. “N-nothing, I’m so glad you trust me enough to come out to me, really, I’m tou-”

Cable jerked his leg away from the mercenary’s touch and looked out the window. “I don’t trust you. And I’m not coming out to you, dumbass.”

“Hey, words hurt!”

“Not as much as a stab wound!”

“Pain makes you unbearable, you know that?!”

“Please, guys, don’t fight, it stresses me out,” Dopinder intervened with his adorable accent, glancing at them through the rearview mirror.

“I’m sorry, my dear cinnamon murder muffin,” Wade said sincerely as he leaned forward to pet Dopinder’s curly hair.

Cable rolled his eyes before closing them and tipping his head forward. If it weren’t for the blood soaking his t-shirt and oozing between his fingers, it could have looked like he was meditating, and maybe he was. Both hands were pressed against his stomach, left eye glowing visibly through the thin skin of his closed eyelid.

Freaky.

After the third Hindi song, Cable lost his struggle to stay awake. His head swayed and dropped on Wade’s shoulder, body sagging against him.

Confused at first, the mercenary made sure he was still breathing. Then he just stared down at the shadows cast by the man’s eyelashes on his cheekbones until they arrived.

Those were some nice cheekbones.


The first thing Cable felt when he came to was the warmth of the sun shining through the white curtains of the hospital room, yellow rays of light streaking the air and turning dust into gold particles.

He looked around and saw a familiar clown clad in red and black sitting next to his bed; he was dozing off in his chair, chin resting on one hand, the other tucked between his crossed legs.

He stayed…?

Cable felt another kind of warmth, this time concentrated in his chest area. He was so fucked.

He remembered the events of the day before and cursed. Tried to. Something was obstructing his mouth.

He took off his oxygen mask clumsily and lifted the collar of his gown to take a look at his stomach; the wound had been dressed impeccably and for once he didn’t feel any pain, not even at the junction of his flesh with the TO virus. There were tubes plugged into his right arm, held in place with medical tape. Obviously the source of his artificial well-being.

He let his head fall back on the fluffy pillow, his body begging him to sleep a little bit more, preferably forever. Judging from the sun, it was well past noon.

Instead, he decided to watch the mercenary who apparently never stopped jabbering even during his sleep. Most of it was gibberish but sometimes a real word would make its way out. They didn’t make any sense and Cable eventually stopped trying to link them together.

“Dolphin!” Wade screamed moments later, jerking awake. When he noticed that Cable was staring at him in confusion, he took his mask off and came closer to the bed, not caring to explain his dolphin-related nightmare. “Oooh, you’re awake! Did you get plenty of beauty sleep? You know it’s not optional at your age…”

“Nice to see you too, asshole,” he croaked. Fuck, his throat was so dry.

“I’ll take that as a yes. What happened anyway? I saw you wreck dozens of guards at the Ice Box without a scratch, so how the hell did you get stabbed?”

Cable frowned, trying to get his sluggish brain back to full function. “I was coming back to the apartment... from the gym... and I heard a girl, crying for help... five guys had her cornered in a back-alley... were tearing off her clothes… I fought them but one of’em was a mutant. Had electromagnetic powers. My arm absorbed most of the shock but it paralyzed it long enough for one of the guys to knife me.”

Wade nodded. It was strange to see him being serious. “What happened to the girl?”

“She ran away. Safe.”

“Great. And the guys?”

Cable smiled. “The luckiest of them might be in this hospital... the others, in the morgue.”


Wade sat back in his chair and fanned himself with his mask. Fuck, was it hot in here or was it him?

Kidding. It was Cable.

Who says things like that in a low, gravelly voice? It would turn anybody on. Not just him.

And that grin. That goddamn, wolfish grin. Illegal.

Yep, time to repress it like trauma.

“The deal,” Cable said, interrupting Wade’s embarrassing inner monologue.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“We had a deal. I’m here, so tell me the most embarrassing reason you’ve ever had to go to the hospital.”

“Oh right. Well, it wasn’t butt reasons so don’t get your hopes up.” Although God knows I love putting stuff in my butt.

Cable squinted at him, his gaze dropping to Wade’s lower belly before coming back up quickly, but the mercenary was pretty sure he hadn’t said the last part aloud.

He pointed at his right eyebrow. “See the tiny smudge of a scar there? It was a lot more visible before I got my Krueger on. Anyway, one night, before said event, I got shitfaced . Like completely, uselessly, ridiculously drunk. And I badly needed to piss so I went to the bathroom. I unpacked Lil’Wade, relieved myself, but knocked the toilet paper off trying to grab it. It didn’t roll very far away so I just bent over to catch it. The problem was, I had my trousers around my knees and the bathroom stall was spinning so fast around me! Long story short, I fell face first on the toilet bowl and passed out. I woke up at the hospital to see Weasel taking pictures of my disfigured self, grinning like the devil he is.”

Pinch him if he was dreaming but Cable was full-on giggling. One could even say he was in stitches (heh, get it? Stitches? The stab wound?).

The man’s whole face was covered in crinkles, crows feet around his eyes and deep lines around the corners of his mouth, emphasizing his cheekbones.

He looked like an entirely different person.

A very attractive one.

“Shuddup, I’m gonna bust my stitches open,” Cable said as he desperately tried to stop laughing. There were tears in his eyes. Shit, what kind of painkillers had they given him? Because Wade needed some. For his... chronic pain, of course. Totally not for recreational uses.

“You asked for it. And it’s not funny! After this incident, every toilet bowl at Sister Margaret’s School for Wayward Girls got covered in faux fur to prevent any further violent encounters.”

Cable wheezed, silently, just air leaving his lungs and his nose crunching up. Adorable.

Wait a minute, since when did that adjective apply to Cable?! He wasn't ‘adorable’! He was rude and racist and A-okay with killing kids !

The man snorted and immediately covered his mouth, looking vaguely ashamed of the noise he’d made.

Ok, mayyybe he was a tiny bit adorable.


Wade was looking at him, face too soft, smile too genuine, brown eyes glinting.

He was beautiful. Pure . The unexpected word resonated loudly and mockingly in Cable’s dazed mind, as if it were reminding him that it disqualified him.

He wasn’t pure. Never had been. The things he’d done to survive in the future… The things he’d done recently...

He looked away and let his own smile die. He didn’t deserve Wade’s friendship or concern.

Part of him wanted to tell him everything, tell him I watched you wearing lingerie and listened to you masturbating to get me off, I know you didn’t know I was there, I’m sorry. Wade would probably be angry and disgusted, because who wouldn’t? He would cut him off, out of his life, and it would be for the best.

But Cable’s cowardly side won.

So he didn’t say anything.

Wade cleared his throat and put his mask back on. “I’m gonna fetch the doctor and tell her you’re awake, ok? I have a job to do but I’ll be back tomorrow morning.” He patted Cable’s shin and walked towards the door. “Flirt with the nurses for me!”

“Wait!” Cable blurted out, unsure of what he wanted to say.

The mercenary stilled, his hand on the handle. “Yeah?”

It took Cable a whole minute to untangle the knot of conflicting emotions in his throat and choose the right option between please stay and don’t come back .

“Thank you.”

Chapter Text

Cable spent most of his bedridden time either sleeping or brooding over his situation.

Carefully avoiding thinking about Wade and miserably failing at it.

He was so bored that he counted the hours to the time the merc had said he would be back.

Out of boredom , and nothing else.


The next morning, when the door of his room finally opened, he expected Wade to come in, loud and colorful and ready to sit by his side and tell him about his last contract with a shitload of unnecessary details.

But it was Domino.

Cable hid his disappointment behind a half-smile. “‘Morning, Neena.”

“Hey! I brought you chocolate but I don’t know if you can eat it yet…” She laid the box on his bedside table and gently smiled at him. “How are you doing?”

“Good, thanks.”

She nodded, clearly sensing that it wasn’t entirely true but choosing to drop it. Cable was grateful.

“Where’s Wade?”

He swallowed and looked out of the window.

“Fucking up some poor bastards, I guess,” he replied nonchalantly.

Domino seemed relieved. “It’s good that he’s not home alone.”

“Why?” Cable frowned, looking back at her.

“Well, I mean... He’s not exactly the most stable person I know. And I don’t think he’s over his girlfriend’s death... He probably never will be. Who would? All I’m saying is this kind of shit has the tendency to gnaw at you when you’re on your own.”

Cable thought about his own loss and felt incredibly stupid for not realizing sooner that he wasn’t the only one grieving. Wade hid it so well, playing the careless fool…

Or had he relied on his telepathy so much that he had lost the ability to read between the lines?

“Just a thought, though!” Domino added lightly, as she noticed Cable’s face growing somber.

“I know, Neena. Thank you.”

“You’re welcome! And get well soon!” She awkwardly waved goodbye and left.

Cable sighed.

What a socially inept idiot he was.


Another nurse came to check on him that night. Cable didn’t pay her much attention, still mulling over what he should have done and had yet to do.

That’s why he jumped when she sat on the bed, leaning heavily against his thigh to unbutton his gown.

“Let’s see if your heart’s metallic, shall we?” she said playfully, and Cable stopped breathing.

Wade .

With a blonde wig, a nurse outfit and a stethoscope around his neck.

“What the fuck!” Cable exclaimed loudly, batting Wade’s hands away from his chest.

“Come ooon, don’t you wanna play doctor with me?” the merc pouted, and- was he wearing lipgloss ?

“You’re completely mental,” Cable said, averting his gaze. His heart wouldn’t stop pounding against his ribcage.

Wade stoop up with a dramatic sigh and slumped in the chair next to the bed.

“Duh.”

Without asking for permission, he opened the chocolates and ate three of them in one go.

Cable took a deep breath in. What on Earth did he see in him?

“Weren’t you going to visit this morning?”

He winced at the accidental reproach in his tone.

Wade looked at him like he was retarded, and maybe he was. “ Well , being a merc isn’t exactly a 9 to 5 job. Extra hours are frequent in the field, especially when your target injects you with enough tranquilizers to kill an elephant.”  

“Right…”

Then almost inaudibly, “Sorry.”

Wade froze for a millisecond, staring at him in disbelief. Then he popped another chocolate into his mouth and rambled idly about a guy who was waiting in the ER, holding his severed thumb inside a bag of ice.

“I’m lucky I can regrow anything because I fucking hate hospitals… I couldn’t stand having to go to one every time I ended up on the wrong side of the blade. And can you imagine the bills ?! God, I miss Canada.”

“You don’t have to come visit me, I’m okay,” Cable said. He understood Wade’s dislike of hospitals; sickness and death in every corner, hope and despair floating like smoke in the sanitized air… He couldn’t wait to get out of here as well.

Wade huffed. “And do what? Go home? Cook? Clean? Hard pass.”

Jesus.

“Well, someone ought to take care of the apartment…”

“Nah, I’m just gonna squat in the X-Mansion. I miss Colossus’ divine buns. And his meat pies, oh , they’re to die for!” Wade sighed dreamily, his gaze lost in the distance.

Picturing the Russian mutant’s ass or pies, Cable couldn’t tell. Because Wade was one of the only persons whose mind he couldn’t read; every time he tried, all he heard was static. Sometimes, if he was lucky, he could see sudden bursts of emotions, floating to the surface before disappearing immediately like bubbles in soda.

But right now? Only that goddamn static.

He clenched his jaw and repressed the wave of jealousy as best as he could. “Go, then. I won’t keep you. And put the outfit back where you took it from!”

Wade grinned and tucked a strand of fake blond hair behind his ear. “You sure? You seemed to like it... I saw you look at my cleavage, you naughty patient.”

Cable’s eyes flicked down involuntarily before he could stop himself. The white dress was indeed too loose on the merc’s flat chest, revealing most of his mottled pectorals and the deep crease between them.

Cable blushed up to his ears. “Not my fault you’re flashing it, asshole!”

“Still not denying!” Wade singsang over his shoulder as he walked towards the door. “See ya tomorrow, Grumpy!”

The door closed.

Cable dropped his head back on the pillow and pinched the bridge of his nose.

Fucking idiot was driving him crazy.


“Home sweet home,” Wade mumbled as he groped Colossus’ ass, face pressed against the giant’s belly.

So hard . Yet comfortable. What kind of soviet magic was this?

The Russian let him hug him with only mild embarrassment, used to the merc’s inappropriate displays of affection at this point. “What do you want, Wade? It is late.”

Wade used his best coaxing, abandoned-kitten tone and surprisingly, he didn’t need to push it too much. “Cable’s at the hospital and I don’t wanna be just me, myself and I, ya feel?”

Bozhe moi , is he alright?”

“Who? Oh yeah, Cable’s fine. He should be out in a couple of days.”

“Great news.” Colossus seemed to hesitate for a few seconds. “You may stay until tomorrow, Wade. But no trouble! And no noise, students are asleep.”

Wade resisted the urge to make a suggestive joke about staying for the night and went straight to the kitchen while Colossus closed the Mansion’s front door.

He threw his mask on the dark granite counter and opened the fridge in search of leftovers. The contents of the only tupperware horrified him. “ Quinoa salad, are you fucking kidding me?! This shit tastes like Satan’s vomit !”

“We have milk and cereal, if you prefer,” Colossus said, bristling at the merc’s language.

“Oh, my savior!” Wade exclaimed, grabbing the milk then cereal from the cupboard.

Only when he sat at the wooden table did he realize that he had forgotten to take a bowl and a spoon. Colossus gave them to him before he could even curse, and sat opposite him, taking two seats at once.

Wade stared longingly at the Russian, a painful warmth spreading in his chest. “It’s such a shame you’re immune to my charms, big guy.”

The giant folded his hands on the tabletop, flustered. “Wade…”

“No, I know, it’s alright!” Wade said hurriedly, waving his spoon in the air as if to dissipate any misunderstanding.

Colossus’s brow furrowed with sadness, which totally defied the laws of nature by the way. “Still, I am sorry I cannot… reciprocate.”

Oh my God. Couldn’t he have just changed the subject or countered his flirty remark with a witty comeback laced with insults like-

Like Cable.

Wade choked on a spoonful of cereal and snorted milk out of his nose. Of course, Colossus immediately stood up to get him a napkin and wipe the table with another. He even tried to pat his back to help him stop coughing, but the merc pushed him away.

Mama used to say ‘shame doesn’t kill’ but at this moment he sure wished it did.

“Are you alright?” Colossus asked after a few minutes, eyeing him warily. At least he hadn’t given him the Heimlich maneuver. Pretty sure Colossus pressing his firm frame against his back as he held him tight would have made everything worse.

Or better.

Wade loudly blew his nose on the napkin, smirking when he saw the giant’s lips curl with disgust. Hey, he had earned this little vengeance, okay? Served the tin can right for always being depressingly serious!

“I’ll probably smell Cheerios for the next 24 hours but yes, thank you.” He put the dirty napkin down and resumed eating his cereal. Ugh, it was soggy already.

To come back to the the cause of the cereal-inhaling incident, since when was Cable a perfect example of sociability? The old fucker spoke more curses than words on his best days!

And yet Wade had wished that Colossus shared that trait with the cyborg, that they could banter back and forth like he did with Cable, without ever addressing issues like responsible adults.  

Shit. Appreciating someone’s flaws was like, the first step of falling for them, wasn’t it?

“So… How is it, living with Cable?” Colossus inquired innocently, the merc’s unusual silence making him uncomfortable.

Jesus Christ.

“How’s Russell? Did he make friends? Please, tell me he didn’t become friends with Pigeon Wings, he deserves a better sidekick.”

Colossus frowned but thankfully , didn’t call him out on his poor evasion skills. There’s always hope.

“Russell is doing fine. The Professor helps him control his emotions so he can better control his powers. And I don’t think he is friends with Angel, no.”

Wade smiled. He felt as proud as if he had personally carried and birthed Russell.

Which was another worrying thought. Apparently tonight was weird-unprompted-thoughts night.  

“Well, I wish I could stay but I’d better go home. Pretty sure there’s still a dart needle stuck in my back and taking it out won’t be pretty.”

Maybe he still had drugs in his system and that’s what was making him so sappy. Yeah, that was the most logical explanation.

He dropped his spoon in the empty bowl and stood up to grab his mask. Once he had put it back on, he turned to Colossus and declared theatrically, “No, don’t try to make me stay! You know it wouldn’t work out between us. You’re the moon, and I’m just a wolf, howling for you from a hilltop.”

He walked backwards out of the kitchen as Colossus squinted at him, completely lost, his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water.

Aw. Bless his soul.

Chapter Text

Wade opened the door of the apartment while loudly singing a Taylor Swift song.

This was in itself a proof that he wasn’t in his right mind.

He locked the front door with a sigh and went straight to the bathroom.

In there came the moment you were all waiting for: the striptease.

Ah, there’s nothing like peeling blood-soaked spandex off your sweaty, disgustingly thick skin.

Nothing like seeing that unholy cross between Ryan Reynolds and a Shar Pei staring back at you in the mirror with those sad, sad eyes.

What was he sad about, you ask? Well, we pretty much covered it all in the first chapter, remember? Probably not, the author takes ages to update.

Anywho.

His reflection was enough of a reason to be sad. Shit, he wouldn’t even fuck himself and he had fucked a Croc .

Obviously, he meant fucking a hypothetical clone, which was totally different from masturbating. Because you can just keep your eyes closed when you tickle your pickle but it’s a lot more complicated to do that when another party is involved.  You gotta see and be seen, touch and be touched.

Hell, the first time Vanessa and he had fucked after Weapon X he had cried .

Who cries during sex?! And we’re talking full-on breakdown with snot and hiccups and limp dick, not the usual teary eyes he always got after a particularly good orgasm. Way to ruin the mood, Wilson.

He dropped his dirty suit on the floor and turned around to look at his back. There was indeed a broken needle stuck deep in the muscle above his left shoulder blade. The silver point barely protruded out of the skin that had reclosed itself around it. He tried digging in with his nails to grab the needle, in vain.

He swore and rummaged in the heap of his suit to find the small knife strapped to the shin part of the costume.

A few minutes and more than a few drops of blood later, the needle fell into the sink with a satisfying clink . He tossed it in the trash can and it landed on Cable’s bandages, the dry blood on them turned brown.

They brought back the vivid memory of the cyborg’s broad torso and rippling abs, when he was standing in Wade’s exact place in front of the mirror two days ago.

Almost despite himself, the merc imagined how his name would sound like, pronounced in one of Cable’s breathy grunts.

Fuck.

Wade stepped into the bathtub, turned the shower on as hot as it would go and grabbed his cock.


“Wow, you’re healing fast,” the surgeon told Cable as she checked his wound. “At this rate, you’ll be able to go home the day after tomorrow.”

He had been using his telekinesis to keep the tissues pressed together and accelerate the natural regeneration process of his body, but he couldn’t tell her that.

“Great, thank you,” he replied instead.

She smiled at him and put on a new gauze pad before taping it carefully. “Your son’s gonna be relieved.”

Cable blinked. “My what?”

“Your son? The guy who brought you here? He said you were his father.”

Jesus. Of course, the idiot never missed a chance to mock his age.

“Right. Yeah, he doesn’t like hospitals.”

“Can’t blame him,” she laughed.

Cable appreciated her. She was someone good doing good for a lot of people, at her own local scale and with her own means. If everyone did as much as her, maybe the future would stand a chance.

“Alright, I’ll come back tomorrow. Rest well!” She stopped in front of the door and turned to him, her hand tense on the handle. Her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes when she added “You’ve been very lucky, Mr. Wilson. If you’d been stabbed an inch lower you wouldn’t have survived.”

Cable didn’t need telepathy to understand the underlying message.

Life’s short. Enjoy it while you can.

This morning, she hadn’t been able to save a 6 years old boy who had been hit by a car.


Wade came with a groan, shooting his load against the sky blue tiles in front of him, one, two, three little white clouds.  

He leant his head back and just panted for a while, his brain floating in a sea of endorphins, hot water running down his chest.

Cable never needed to know that what had pushed him over the edge was a picture of him fucking Wade into the mattress, holding his arms behind his back with his metal hand as he spilled inside him with a growl.

The merc moaned softly. He could almost feel the warm cum in his ass.

Ok, so let’s say he was a tad bit attracted to Cable. As long as it remained only physical, there was no problem. He collected unrequited crushes like mental disorders, after all.

Wade shook his head and grabbed his peach-scented soap.

Cable never needed to know. It’s not like he was interested in him, anyway. He always treated him like shit, calling him names and bossing him around...

How wrong was it that he kinda liked it?


Cable was standing in front of the window, basking in the early afternoon sunshine, when Wade burst into his room, exclaiming “Boom, ba-”

The rest of the word died on the merc’s lips as his eyes flickered down. The cyborg swiftly reached behind his back to close his gown and turned around. “The fuck’s wrong with you, can’t you knock like a normal person?!”

“I… huh…” Wade looked like he was brain-dead. Except he wasn’t because Cable could telepathically hear it sizzling like eggs in a frying pan.

The merc tried to regain composure and he would have succeeded if he hadn’t stuttered “W-Well, you don’t see me asking if you moon every person who comes in this room, do you?!”

Cable smirked. It wasn’t every day that he got to destabilize Wade and he took a perverse pleasure in it. “Only the worthy ones...” he said as he checked him out; he was wearing a red varsity jacket and a rep cap, both with his logo on them, and a pair of baggy blue jeans that really complimented his broad hips.

Wade’s jaw dropped. The static became so loud that Cable had to shut it out or it would have drilled into his head like a migraine.

Then Wade started clapping, slowly, a huge, fake smile on his face. His voice was trembling with emotion when he said “Ha, ha, ha, sooo funny! Let’s flirt with the lonely burn victim who has to pay a hooker $200 to get a blowjob. Real low, Cable, even from your height!”

Oh, fuck.

Cable walked towards him, dragging his I.V. along. “Wade, it’s not-”

The merc extended his arm and dropped the plastic bag he was carrying on the floor. “Your clothes, for when you get out. I accept your apology.”

He turned on his heel and left, ignoring Cable’s calls.


Now that was just fucking mean , even from Cable. How dare he play with his-

Wade stopped this train of thought in its tracks. The word he was about to say was ridiculous and childish.

He wasn’t gonna be upset about this. Cable didn’t deserve it. He didn't deserve it. Ha! Take that, terrible sense of self-worth! Who said therapy doesn’t work?

It totally works, which is exactly why Wade entered a Victoria’s Secret store and impulse-bought seven lace panties including one risque but adorable yellow cheeky with windows in all the right places, and one black plunge teddy that would look amazing with his black fishnet stockings.

How he would fit his non-lady parts in these was a whole other issue. He’d make do, as always.

Wade ignored the stingy little fact that the cashier hadn’t looked at his face the entire time she was scanning the articles and left the store with a pretty, candy-pink bag.

She had flinched when he had accidentally brushed her fingers, grabbing said bag.


The rest of a hot dog he had bought on his way home in the mouth, he unlocked the door of the apartment and went straight to his room, trembling with excitement.

Yeah, cocaine was amazing and he fucking loved it, but trying on new lingerie? It was a very special kind of rush.

He finished the hot dog, washed his hands because he’d rather die than smear ketchup on his purchases and put on some Wham! ; he needed to channel George's sexiness for this.

He stripped down entirely and decided to try the yellow velvet panty first. He put it on slowly, because it was so delicate he feared that it would rip before it had gone past his muscled thighs, but it didn’t.

He fucking knew George wouldn’t let him down.

He adjusted his junk and pivoted in front of the mirror.

“Holy nuts.” This one was definitely in his top 3.

The window on the asscrack was amazingly slutty, yet the velvet fabric and lace on the front was beautifully innocent.

It truly was the mullet of panties: business in the front, party in the back.

“Oh, Ness, I hope you can see me where you are. And also that you’re touching yourself, or frankly, I’d feel hurt.”

Only silence answered him.

The irrational part of him, which was the biggest part of him, still hoped that she would somehow reach him from the afterlife. Of course, he could kill himself again to see her but she had forbidden him to.

He swallowed the lump in his throat and his hands twitched at his sides.

“There’s a time for us . It’s just not now.

He often repeated this line in his head like a mantra. Some nights, it was the only thing that would put him to sleep.

The decor of their home was already fading in his memory but he wouldn’t forget Vanessa’s words, nor her face when she had said them.

He couldn’t forget, could he? No, he loved her too much.

Yet he had loved his mom and he couldn’t even remember the color of her eyes.

Wade took off the panties with shaky fingers, turned up the music a little louder and tried on the teddy next.  

Chapter Text

It took Cable a long time to gather the courage to unlock the front door and walk into the apartment; he had sensed Wade’s presence in it from the very first floor.

Sure enough, the merc was lying on the couch, watching TV in gray sweatpants and a light pink t-shirt. He looked so soft that Cable wanted nothing more than to climb on him and breathe in his unique scent.

But he couldn’t.

“Look who’s back in black!” Wade greeted him easily.

The cyborg straightened his black leather jacket nervously, working his jaw as he struggled to find something to say. “Hey. Thanks for bringing me clothes, the other day.”

Not bad, but he still needed to tell the merc that he hadn’t been joking when he had flirted with him at the hospital. That he desired him so much that it was actually driving him mad. That he really found him handsome.

Wade’s brown eyes glued themselves back to the TV screen and he shrugged. “You’re welcome.”

At the same time as Cable opened his mouth to speak again, the merc burst out laughing at something one of the old ladies on-screen had said.

The cyborg shut his mouth so quickly his teeth clicked.

Now wasn’t the right time. Wade was relaxed and happy and all too absorbed in his TV show.

Deep down, though, Cable knew that he wasn’t sparing Wade as much as he was sparing himself.

Disheartened, he went to the bathroom and groaned when he saw the pitiful state of his hair in the mirror; it was greasy as hell and he also desperately needed to shave.

Shower, first.


Wade exhaled shakily as soon as he heard the water run.

He’d never been one for hunting innocent animals but he might make an exception for a silver fox.

Because that gray stubble? On that square jaw? A vision .

Only made better by the leather jacket that Cable should definitely wear 24/7.

Uh-oh. He was so screwed.

Cable was naked ten feet away from him and even though a wall separated them, he could see him in 4K on the inside of his eyelids.

Wade pictured himself joining the cyborg in the shower to clean the wires and plates of his metal arm with the round dish brush that he had made fun of him for, carefully getting the dirt and blood out of every nook and cranny. Then he would hold his hand close to his face and lick the freshly cleaned metal fingers one by one as Cable would watch him with heated eyes...

Wade brought his knees closer to his chest and tucked his already half-hard dick between his thighs.

Damn his overactive imagination.

Spoiler alert: cursing it didn’t stop it.

A few minutes after the water stopped, he heard the sound of an electric razor buzzing in the bathroom.

Wade sighed mournfully.

Bye bye, stubble. Gone too soon.


When Cable got out of the bathroom, Wade was still lying on the couch, although in a weird, fetal position. He didn’t think about it twice, Wade being… well, Wade.

He went in his room to put some clothes on, winced when his movements tugged at his healing wound. Then he checked that his weapons were still under his bed and that the teddy bear on his bedside table was still immaculate.

It took a lot of tension out of his shoulders to see that everything was exactly the way he had left them.

He kinda hated himself for doubting Wade. A part of him had feared that the merc would have borrowed his guns during his absence and used them recklessly. From the very start of their cohabitation, he had threatened him to kill him permanently if he ever so much as laid a finger on his stuff.  

Fuck. He really should have been nicer to him. Maybe Wade would have actually believed him back at the hospital, if he had been.

Cable sighed and walked to the kitchen. He opened the fridge and groaned when all he saw was an almost-empty bottle of Mountain Dew.

“Of course, you didn’t buy groceries! What did you eat all those days?! And don’t say Chinese!”

“Chinese.”

Jesus.

“You’re lucky you can’t get scurvy, moron.”

“Actually I can , my body just heals the symptoms,” Wade replied matter-of-fact.

Cable stared at the back of the couch where the voice was coming from.

He couldn’t believe how much the merc relied on his healing factor. How unconcerned he was by his own physical health. On second thought, it shouldn’t surprise him that much; in the Ice Box, Wade had snapped his own spine in half to protect Russel from him, and he didn’t even have his powers at the time.

Cable took a few calming breaths and skirted the couch to ask Wade face to face, “What d’you wanna eat tonight?”

The merc blinked up at him, taken aback by the unusual gentleness in Cable’s voice, as he himself was.

“Tacos?” Wade said hopefully, craning his neck. He couldn’t quite hold the cyborg’s gaze and his arms tightened around his knees.

Cable scowled, waiting for Wade to choose a satisfactory answer, enjoying seeing him shrink in on himself.

He made a mental note to address his power issues, someday.

“Four-seasons pizza? Come on, there’re vegetables on that one! Fine , make me a goddamn salad. What’s the point in asking me if you get to chose anyway?!” Wade complained.

Before he could stop himself, Cable patted the merc’s bald head patronizingly and smirked. “Illusion of control.”  

Wade’s pupils blew wide. Then he stopped breathing and stared at the TV screen like his life depended on it.

His brain waves were crackling like fire in the air.

Cable frowned. What had he said to upset him this time?

Wade dismissed him with a sharp, “Money’s in my jacket. Don’t get stabbed again.”

He nodded and left the merc alone after a few seconds of confusion.

If only he could read his mind.


As soon as he didn’t hear Cable’s footsteps on the staircase anymore, Wade cursed and rolled on his back. He pulled his hard cock out of his sweatpants and started furiously jerking off, using his abundant precum like lube.

Fucking Cable fucking with him. The old son of a bitch was playing him like a fiddle and the worst part was that he wanted more of it.

So much more.

Wade tipped his head back on the armchair and bit his lip. He yearned for his vibrator but getting up and walking to his room to get it would require too much effort right now.

So he sucked on both his index and middle finger at the same time before pushing them inside his hole, lifting one leg up and throwing the other over the couch.

He hissed at the burn and quickened his pace, remembering Cable towering over him, the orange light in his left eye glowing softly as he stared him down…

How small and vulnerable he had felt, and, for the first time in his life, not in the way that was guaranteed to give him a panic attack.

Because he wasn’t in control, but he was safe.

He was cared for .

Wade came all over his fist with Cable’s voice rumbling filthy praises to him.

The fact that they would only ever exist in his mind ruined his afterglow a little bit.


When Cable came home with two bags full of groceries, Wade was in an even worse mood. He barely acknowledged his return and sulked during the entire supper.

At least he seemed to like the homemade Greek salad, judging from his very empty plate.

The unusual silence was setting Cable’s teeth on edge. He could sometimes grasp the reasons for Wade’s unpredictable mood swings, but that evening, he had no clue.

Although he had something that would definitely lift his spirits.

“You heard about the mutant kids disappearing across the country? They’re being taken for illegal genetic research.”

“No I haven’t, when do we leave?” Wade replied, his eyes twinkling with something dark. He had sat up straight in his chair, thrilled at the prospect of killing child abusers.

Bingo , Cable thought, smiling. There was nothing like a mission to keep your mind on track.

“Not so fast, cowboy, we’re talking secret government activities here.”

“How d’you know Uncle Sam is behind it?”

“Because your future is my past.”

“Please, not that Messiah crap again, I’m not in the mood to use my brain.”

Cable chuckled. “When are you?”

“Uncalled for,” Wade muttered. The way he knitted his eyebrows made Cable want to kiss his frown away.

He drained his glass of water instead and said, “I’ll go speak with Charles Xavier tomorrow. He must know about it, through Cerebro.”

“Fine, I’ll just fondle Colossus while you’re talking to Cue Ball.”

Cable couldn’t help but bristle at the mention of the Russian mutant. Even if he hated it, it made sense that Wade only had eyes for Colossus; he was the exact opposite of him.

Young. Tall. Moral. Endlessly kind and supportive.

“You do that.” He stood up and headed to the bathroom to brush his teeth, adding over his shoulder, “Put everything in the dishwasher, I’m going to bed.”

Cable heard Wade grumble but comply anyway.


A scream jolted the cyborg awake in the middle of the night. He immediately grabbed the gun under his pillow, cocked it and waited, listening intently.

“No, please, please , stop!” a voice sobbed wetly after a few seconds of silence.

Wade.

Cable got up and tiptoed to the next room, gun at the ready; the merc was thrashing in his bed, fighting his sheets as if they were restraints. And maybe, in his nightmare, they were.

He put the safety back on and came closer to the bed. “Wade, wake up. You’re dreaming.”

“Leave me alone!” Wade shrieked, making Cable jump and step back. But he was still asleep; tears were rolling down his scarred face from his closed eyes.

Cable turned the lights on. “Wade, it’s not real,” he tried again, this time nudging the merc’s shoulder with his TO hand.  

Wade bolted upright, gasping like a drowning man. He looked all around with wide eyes, panting hard as he tried to remember where he was.

“You’re safe, Wade, it was a nightmare. I’m right here,” Cable said as softly as he could, raising his hands. Only then did he realize he should have set the gun down, but it didn’t freak Wade out; in fact he didn’t seem to notice it.  

The merc stared at him before he wiped his tears away with the sheet, clutching it against his bare chest. “S-s-sorry for waking you up.”

He was still shaking.

“It’s alright. You gonna be okay?”

“Yeah, of course, it ain’t my first rodeo,” he chuckled humorlessly.

Cable nodded. He often had nightmares as well. Events forever branded in his memory.

“Good night, Wade,” he said as he walked out of the room.

“Wait!”

Cable stilled and turned to Wade; he was staring at a very precise point on the floor near his bare feet and didn’t look up when he asked, “Could you stay?”

The cyborg felt his heart fall to approximately where Wade was looking.

“What?” he heard himself say.


“Could you… stay? You get to be the big spoon. Actually you’d be more of a jetpack.”

Cable frowned at him, completely lost, lips parted. Wade barked out a laugh that was bordering on hysterical. “Don’t look at me like that, I’m not asking you to fuck me, just to sleep with me. Shit, accidental double entendres here, I mean really sleeping.”

When Cable remained frozen in place he added, “Please? I don’t wanna be alone right now.”

Now that seemed to reboot his metal brain. The cyborg turned off the lights, slowly circled the bed, laid his gun on the other bedside table and sat down even slower, every muscle of his back visibly tense.

If Wade wasn’t feeling as awkward as Cable, he would have made a joke about him moving like Robocop.

His heart still hammering in chest, Wade lay on his left side and turned his back to Cable; the older man took the hint and slipped under the covers, lying beside him, close enough that they could feel each other’s heat but far enough that they didn’t touch.

Well, sometimes you gotta settle for a half victory and swallow your disappointment.

Wade’s heart almost exploded when, a few moments later, Cable gingerly put a pillow between his hips and the merc’s ass, preventing him from feeling any embarrassing hard-on that might happen by morning.

A lost chance, really, but a lovely thought.

Chapter Text

A soft voice was talking to him.

Gently luring him out of a slumber filled with dreams and memories so intertwined he couldn’t tell for sure which was which.

He stirred and grunted. The bed was warm and comfortable; it felt like floating in tropical waters and he didn’t want to leave this state of semi-consciousness just yet.

But a delicate hand touched his right shoulder, nudging him twice. He sighed and rolled on his back, pulling the arm toward him so that its owner was bent over him and he could grab her face for a kiss.

Aliya.

She was smiling at him. He gently stroked the dimples on her cheeks with his thumbs, feeling himself mirror her smile.

She chuckled in a way that made his heart ache and said, as she held his wrists, “Wake up, sleepy-”

“-head,” Wade finished, only four inches away from him.

Wide brown eyes instead of calm gray ones.

Scars and bumps under his fingertips instead of smooth, unmarked skin.

Cable immediately let go of the mercenary’s face and cursed, blushing with embarrassment. “S-sorry, ‘thought you were… you were…”

“Your wife? Yeah, recycling’s only good for trash, Cable,” Wade said, straightening.

His words had a weird edge to them, a bitterness that had no reason to be. Cable couldn’t remember the last time Wade had called him by his name either.

He propped himself up on the T.O. hand and brushed his hair backwards with his flesh hand, blinking the last remnants of sleep away.

Wade was staring at him like he was expecting something, arms crossed over his chest, thoughts going a mile per minute, judging from the static.

Cable was about to run away when he realized it wasn’t a good idea; the merc was fully clothed and he was only wearing briefs.

White briefs that would leave nothing to the imagination.

Thankfully, the sheets were hiding his morning wood and the pillow was still lying across his hips, somehow.

“Before you tried to tickle my tonsils with your tongue, I was telling you that breakfast is ready. I think it’s called ‘brunch’ at this hour, though.”

Cable  winced and averted his eyes. Why Wade hadn’t tried to punch him for trying to kiss him was a mystery.  “Ok... sorry again. I was dreaming.”

“Well, keep your wet dreams in your bed, next time.”

“You’re the one who asked me to stay!”

The merc nodded, then shrugged. “A huge mistake, for sure. Not my worst, but second worst.”

Cable frowned. Before he could ask what the fuck was wrong with him, because that was only an accident, and clearly they had both slept better than any other night since they fucking moved in here, Wade turned on his heel and left the room.


That was a close call.

So close that he still felt butterflies in his stomach, and the flappy shits were having an orgy that would make most of the Satanists jealous.

Pitiful .

What was he, a fourteen-year-old boy? Cable just manhandled him a bit - which only happened because he was too surprised to react, by the way - and suddenly, he was like a virgin, touched for the very first time...

He stopped right there before the song could get stuck in his head and cursed when he realized that the bacon was burning. He turned off the stove and set the pan aside as Cable walked into the kitchen, fully clothed, thank George.

The cyborg poured himself a cup of coffee before eyeing the contents of the pan warily. “It’s burnt,” he declared.

“No shit, Sherlock! It’s your fault, you’re fucking hard to wake up,” Wade replied, accusingly waving a fork at him.

Cable took a deep breath in, like he was being a pain in the ass, and not the other way around. “You could have lowered the heat for the time it took you to come get me.”

Wade ate a black strip of bacon out of rage, satisfied when he saw Cable wince at the sizzling sound it made on his tongue. “I could have, would I have thought of it. Luckily for you, I cooked some scrambled eggs too.” He looked at the second pan. “Omelet,” he amended in a small voice.

Cable pushed him out of the way to grab said pan and empty it into the trash can. The ‘omelet’ slid out of it like a rubber sole.

“You’re a fucking disaster, you know that?!” He rinsed the pan, put butter in it and broke some eggs in a bowl. “Watch and learn,” he growled.

And Wade did, because, for once, he had a pretext to stare at Cable’s hands. Oh, if only he could get those fingers inside him… especially the metal ones… How would that feel? Were they cold like Colossus’ or warm? The only certainty was that they were thinner than Colossus’. It made sense, because imagine if they weren’t proportionate; he would have been fucked in the ass already. Yaoi rule.

“You’re not listening, are you?” Cable sighed.

“I am! Could you just repeat the last thing you said, the one in the middle and the one at the start?”

“Jesus, why do I even bother...”

“Because I’m adorable?”

“You’re really not.”

Ouchie. Fair, but, ouchie.

“First, you crack the eggs in a bowl and you beat’em good,” Cable drawled as he did just that.

Wade swallowed the very obvious lewd joke that could have been made here and honestly, he deserved a trophy for that.

“You’re done when they’re making bubbles. Then you mix in the milk. Add salt, pepper. When the pan is hot enough and the butter has melted, pour the mix. Stir it when the middle starts to become solid, and when there’s almost no liquid left, turn off the stove. That’s the key to keep’em fluffy and not dry as fuck, like yours.”

Wade clapped sarcastically, unimpressed. “Wow, you were almost nice for a whole minute, there. New record.”

Cable huffed, raising one eyebrow at him as a smirk curled his lips. “Would ‘nice’ even work on you?”

Huh.

The cyborg seemed to realize just how flirty that had sounded and quickly refocused his attention on the food. “Sit down. It’s ready.”

His voice was back to the sharp, military tone it usually had.

The tone that made Wade want to comply without any witty remark and rip his clothes off.

Which kinda answered Cable’s question, come to think of it.


Dopinder dropped them off at the X-Mansion.

They got out of the taxi and Wade stretched at his side, beaming. He had rambled about anything that had crossed his mind during their ‘brunch’ and ride here, which Cable had taken as a good sign.

A sign that there were no hard feelings for the almost-kiss incident and that Wade hadn’t picked up on his flirting attempt either.

The last part was actually depressing, but it spared him a lot of potential trouble he didn’t have time for now anyway.

The Professor was waiting on the terrace behind the mansion, Colossus standing next to him. It was a beautiful, sunny autumn afternoon; surely was it the reason they were gonna talk outside instead of in Xavier’s office.

“Professor,” Cable said as he shook the man’s hand.

“Cable,” Xavier smiled, and the cyborg was thankful to him for not calling him by his real name. Wade would never let him live it down. Speaking of...

“Oh my God, I can’t believe we have enough budget to afford McAvoy! I loved your work in ‘Split’!”

“Hum, thank you, Wade,” Xavier said as he awkwardly let the merc shook his whole arm.

Do you have any idea what he’s talking about? he asked Cable through telepathy.

The cyborg bit the inside of his cheeks to keep himself from laughing.   99% of the time, he could as well be speaking in tongues .

I can’t read him. I only hear… noise.

Cable sighed. I know. Me too. He grabbed Wade’s shoulder so he would stop shaking Xavier’s hand like crazy and squeezed. “Why don’t you go see if Russell’s here? Kid must have missed you.”

“He has,” Colossus intervened helpfully. “Let us go see him, Wade.”

Cable didn’t know it was possible to feel simultaneously thankful and irritated. He watched them leave, jaw clenched. Wade couldn’t keep his hands off the Russian, jumping all around him like an overexcited dog.

He was so beautiful when he was smiling like that.

You’re really fond of him, aren’t you? came Xavier’s voice in his mind. He was looking at him with a knowing smile that immediately made Cable see red.

How’s Erik? he retorted coldly.

Xavier’s face turned pale as his mouth opened in shock. Then anger spiked, boiling surprisingly hard through their telepathic link before acceptance finally settled in. He relaxed in his wheelchair, his knuckles no longer whitening on the armrests.

Cable smiled. “It’s dangerous to read another telepath’s mind without their consent, Professor.”

“You’re right. I invaded your privacy and I’m genuinely sorry.”

Cable didn’t need to delve into his head to know he was telling the truth; his remorse was transparent enough in his pale eyes. “It’s alright. So, about the kids I told you about on the phone…”

Xavier designated a table under a sunshade on their left. “Of course, please take a seat...”


“... and this is why you should never pee after eating a raw jalapeño, unless you have thoroughly washed your hands,” Wade concluded as Cable appeared on the threshold of Russell’s room, next to the Professor.

The way Cable kept glancing at Russell while carefully avoiding his gaze immediately made his hair stand up. At least it would be standing up if he still had some.

“Russell, may we talk to you? It’s about a very important issue but nobody will force you to do anything you don’t want to,” Xavier said in a gentle voice.

The kid almost jumped out of his bed. “Is it a mission?! Do I get to accomplish my first mission as an X-Man?!”

“Calm down, buttercup,” Wade said, stepping between the teenager and the two men. “What’s it about and why are you two looking like dentists look when they say it won’t hurt?”

Cable and Professor X stared at each other, as if they were exchanging thoughts. Oh my God, they totally were, this was definitely a red flag...

“Xavier can’t track the children once they’ve been taken. Cerebro can only detect the mutants who are… conscious, and the kids are drugged for transport. We need to know where they end up so we can rescue them,” Cable explained.

Unbelievable.

“You want to use Russell as bait ?”

He got his answer when the cyborg winced and the Professor looked at the floor.

“Holy shit, and I thought you had a hint of morality under all that metal. But you’re just a T-800.”

Cable frowned, hurt even if he didn’t get the reference.

“I can do it!” Russell exclaimed, sounding a lot braver than he looked; he had retreated against the wall and his breathing was uneven.

“Hell, no! You’re gonna stay right here and let school bore you out of your mind and kill your critical thinking!” Wade turned back to Cable, steam practically coming out of his ears. “Russell won’t serve as bait! A kid. is not. bait !!!”

The cyborg raised his hands. “Wade, I don’t like it anymore than you do, please, calm d-”

“He just got out of a mutant-torturing facility and you want to put him back in another one, how the fuck could I be calm?!” he yelled.

Russell pulled the sleeve of his jacket. “Wade… I’ve seen the news on TV... I’ve seen the pictures of all the children who disappeared. It could have been me. If I can help them, I have to try.”

Wade wanted nothing more than to hug him. He booped his nose instead as he swallowed the lump in his throat. “Kid, I couldn’t be prouder of you but it’s too dangerous.”

Russell’s big brown eyes widened at the praise. Shit, now he wanted to hug him even more. But Cue Ball had to open his cakehole again and ruin the moment.

“We won’t let anything happen to him. He’d be wearing a tracker and Cable and you would be following him closely in the X-Jet, ready to intervene at the slightest sign of danger. Of course, Colossus, Negasonic and Yukio already agreed to accompany you.”

“Did you tell them you were using Russell as bait, Professor ?”

Xavier shook his head guiltily.

“That’s what I thought.”


“I can do it, Wade, I swear! I’m not scared!” Russell insisted. Wade shot him a stern look that made the kid shut up immediately.

Cable had never seen the merc that mad and he was honestly terrifying. Take the clown act away and all you were left with was an expert swordsman who couldn’t die.

But he still had to change his mind; if they didn’t stop this, they would have an army of genetically-engineered mutant soldiers on their hands in ten years, while their kind would have died out.

“Wade, the more we wait, the more kids disappear. Some of them could already have been sold to foreign buyers, or worse,” Cable pleaded. “They need us.”

A throwing knife grazed his ear before planting itself into the expensive wood panelling behind him. He jumped, as did everyone in the room except the one who had thrown it.

Wade turned away, put his hands on his knees to be at eye-level with Russell and asked him, “Are you sure you wanna do it? I won’t think any less of you if you say no.”

His soft tone was a striking contrast to the impulsive violence he had just displayed.

Russell nervously bit his lip before he replied, “Y-yeah, I’m sure!”

Wade straightened with a sigh and turned back to Cable and Xavier, his usual grace strained with barely-contained anger.

The way the merc looked at the former let him knew that the knife was only a foretaste.

Chapter Text

The ride back to their apartment was the most uncomfortable thing Cable had ever lived.

Wade had remained dead silent, staring out of the window the entire time. The atmosphere in the cab was stifling, and Dopinder’s flowery car perfume and obnoxious Indian songs were only making it worse.

Cable was pretty sure that if Hell existed, it would look exactly like this.

He barely dared to breathe , afraid that if he somehow reminded Wade of his presence, the merc would gut him right then and there on the backseat; he wasn’t sure he would have the willpower to fight him, at least not as much as he had in the Ice Box, and he hadn’t even won back then.

But now that they were both alone and before Wade could disappear into his room, he needed to talk to him.

He hung his jacket on the coat rack next to Wade’s customized one, kicked off his combat boots and followed him further into the apartment.

“Listen, I’m sor-”

Cable barely avoided Wade’s swing, his T.O. hand stopping the merc’s fist one inch before it would have reached his jaw.

What he didn’t avoid was Wade headbutting him hard enough to bust his left eyebrow open; blood gushed out of it, spraying his assailant’s scarred face.  

“I fucking hate you!!!” Wade snarled, pure venom in his voice.

The words felt like a punch to the stomach and hurt just as much. Cable stumbled and wiped his eye, using his telekinesis to close the wound as best as he could and keep the blood from blinding him.  

“The fuck do you hate me for?! It was Russell’s choice! Kid’s old enough to make his own decisions!”

Wade tried to hit him a second time; Cable ducked and used the merc’s momentum to send him crashing into the living room wall.

He extracted himself out of the plaster like it was nothing and charged again, covered in white dust.

“I hate you for being an insensitive dick who thinks a fourteen year-old boy can validly consent! I hate you for not having discussed this stupid idea with me beforehand! And finally , I hate you for stealing the skee ball token from the night Vanessa and I met, even if you saved my life with it!” Wade yelled, punctuating each accusation with a devastating blow that Cable blocked with his cybershield. He heard the merc’s joints shatter wetly against it and winced as he was pushed back towards the center of the room, his feet skidding on the carpet.

He gritted his teeth, trying not to lose his balance. “We won’t let anything happen to him! And I’m sorry for not telling you and for taking that coin, I didn’t know what it meant to you!”

Wade screamed in rage and swept Cable’s leg with a low kick that made the cyborg collapse on the wooden table in front of the TV, smashing it into shards. If their yelling hadn’t alerted the neighbors yet, this certainly would. A quick scan of the nearby minds let him know that he was correct; a mother from the apartment directly below theirs was about to call the police until he told her not to.

This one second of distraction was enough for Wade to straddle him and jab his fingertips into the almost-healed stab wound above Cable’s navel, making him grunt in pain.

It was vicious and smart, so very Wade that he could only look up at him in awe.

The merc’s face did something unreadable at that, then he punched at Cable’s nose with renewed aggression. The cyborg caught his wrist halfway and snapped it, before he used his telekinesis to knock Wade off.

He wasn’t proud of this last move but Wade was too far gone for him not to use all of his abilities.

Besides, something dark and primal inside him just couldn’t let the merc win.

Cable grabbed Wade’s skull to smash it into the pile of wooden shards as he pinned both of the merc’s arms against his chest with his T.O. hand. He couldn’t find another way to immobilize Wade’s legs other than by gripping one between his thighs and leaning on the other one so that he was basically lying on top of him.

Wade thrashed like hell but even if he was taller and possibly stronger than him, Cable had forty additional pounds of metal to hold him down with.

The merc eventually stopped struggling, though every muscle of his body remained as taut as a bowstring.

It was during this ceasefire that Cable noticed the familiar crackling sounds of Wade’s brain waves, this time coupled with something entirely unfamiliar: the hardness pressing against the top of his right thigh.

“You… You’re aroused,” Cable breathed, dumbfounded. “This sound means you’re aroused.”

Wade turned his head to spit a mix of blood and saliva on the carpet. “What the fuck are you talking about, it’s just a good fight boner, nothing else! It’s definitely not for you.”

Cable rubbed his thigh against the merc’s crotch, making him hiss. “You sure? Because we weren’t fighting the other night, when you were on the couch…”

Wade’s eyes widened. “Sonovatoaster!” He bit his lip and looked anywhere but Cable’s face. “ Fine , but don’t think this is over! Just... just touch me .” When the cyborg didn’t, he glanced up at him through his black eyelashes.

“Please,” came in a whisper.

The dam broke and weeks of longing flowed over Cable, leaving him nothing but animalistic want.

He unbuttoned the merc’s jeans and flipped him on his stomach unceremoniously.


Ho-ho-holy shit, it really was happening, guys. Christmas was coming early this year and so would he, if Cable didn’t stop making these little grunts of sheer impatience .

Like he was a gift that he couldn’t wait to unwrap and make his. Fuck.

When Cable moved to pull his baggy jeans down, Wade suddenly remembered what he was wearing under them and shrieked, “WAIT!”

But it was too late.

Cable was staring at the yellow velvet panties like he was having an aneurysm. And maybe he was. He was right in the demographic, after all.

“Uh, I can explain.”

Wade couldn’t, actually, but at least it filled the awkward silence for a moment. His anxiety flared up, and he was about to put his pants back on and run away when Cable stroked his ass with his flesh hand, fingertips gently grazing the fabric. “Fuck, Wade… they’re beautiful. You’re beautiful.”

Wade blushed so hard that it was surely visible despite the thickness of his skin. “Zip it and fuck me before I change my mind,” he said in a rasping tone.

Thankfully, he didn’t need to repeat himself; Cable pulled opened the lower window of his panties and spat directly on his asscrack, making him jump.

“Jesus christening fuck !” Wade yelped, his dick straining against the velvet. “You’re really not wasting time, are you?!” He cursed again when Cable pushed his thumb into his hole without warning. The burn combined with the wet fabric rubbing maddeningly against his erection almost made him come on the spot.

“Been wanting you for so long,” Cable growled, twisting his thumb inside him, stretching him open hard and fast. “So fucking long and you kept riling me up like the little shit you are.” He hooked his thumb and pulled down so that he could spit some more directly inside him.

Wade let out what could only be described as a squeak and reflexively bucked his hips.

Cable paused. “Still on board with this?” he asked, running his hands up and down his legs soothingly.

Wade craned his neck to look over his shoulder and ended up staring at the cyborg’s impressive girth; he had unbuttoned his beige pants and his dick was jutting out of them, thick and heavy. “Wow. I don’t know which one of your guns I’m more jealous of, right now. And mother nature has endowed me well!”

Cable chuckled and glanced at Wade’s dick, which was obscenely tenting the yellow panties between his legs. “Indeed.” He plastered himself against his back and murmured in his ear, “Maybe I’ll let you fuck me, someday. But something tells me you prefer to be on the receiving end.”

Wade shuddered violently. “Oh my God, are you trying to make me beg for your dick? Because I’m totally not above that.”

The cyborg’s fingers dug into his flesh before they relaxed their iron grip. “No, it won’t be necessary. I can feel you grinding against me like a bitch in heat.”

Wade froze when he realized he was indeed doing that and his face burnt with embarrassment.

He couldn’t find any witty comeback, the blood rushing in his ears drowning any coherent thought.


“You didn’t even notice you were doing it, did you?” Cable said as he lined himself up and pushed in with a steady, slow thrust. “Instinct’s never wrong,” he grunted.

By the time he was balls deep inside Wade, the merc was a whimpering mess, clawing at the carpet like he was trying to escape.

Cable let him adjust to his size, closing his eyes as he focused not to lose it right then. “Fuck, you’re so tight.”

“You’re so big , you mean!” Wade panted. “Holy shitbiscuit , I could probably take Colossus after this.”

Cable smacked his left buttcheek with his T.O. hand, harder than he had meant to, but the way Wade cried out and tightened around his cock made him forget about any apology.

“Don’t you dare think about him when I’m fucking you.”

He started moving at a punishing pace, watching the merc’s back writhe in response. The hand-shaped bruise on his ass was already fading under his metal fingers.

“Make me forget about him, then,” Wade breathed, challenge crystal clear in the way he peered at him from the corner of his eye, one cheek squeezed against the floor. “Make me forget about everything.”

Cable slowed down as he allowed himself to feel wonder for the man sprawled in front of him; Wade already had his respect and loyalty, but he wanted to give him so much more that the intensity of his feelings surprised him.

He wanted to kiss every inch of his skin until Wade believed him when he said he was beautiful. Wanted him bare, inside and out, for him to touch, to worship, to know. Wanted to learn how to undo him and build him back up since he couldn’t just pick how to do it from his mind.

But more than anything, he wanted him to feel loved.

“Hellooo? I’m getting bored, down there. My knees will survive this position but yours probably won’t so you might want to speed the fuck up.”

Cable fondly rolled his eyes before he obliged, pressing a hand between Wade’s shoulder blades to angle his thrusts better. It took him a few tries to find the spot that made the merc gasp and quiver every time he hit it.

Wade didn’t speak again.

A wolfish smile tugged at Cable’s lips. “Not so smug anymore, are you?” He pulled back to move his hands to the merc’s narrow waist, sliding them under his t-shirt to touch the feverishly hot skin underneath it.

“Damn, I wish you could see what I see. Your tight little hole spread so wide around my cock, swollen pink and glistening with my spit… makes me want to eat you out. What d’you say?”

Wade made a guttural sound that might have been a hearty ‘fuck’. Cable smirked as he pounded into him quicker, feeling his release build in his guts. Wade must have been close as well because he tried to jerk himself off before Cable immobilized both of his arms with his telekinesis.

“You motherfucking cheater !” Wade sobbed, desperate for more friction on his cock. He couldn’t do anything in this position, ass sticking in the air, chest and face on the carpet, legs spread as wide as his crumpled jeans allowed.

Exactly like Cable wanted him.

“Shh, you don’t need it,” he gritted between his teeth, really putting his back into each thrust now. His knees were killing him but he couldn’t stop, not when they were both teetering on the edge. He thought of something that would either make it or break it and said it before he could chicken out.

“Good girls come from penetration alone*.”

Wade’s breath hitched in his throat and his muscles clenched so hard around Cable’s cock that the cyborg lost control; he came with a groan, spilling inside him as his rhythm faltered.

Cable pulled out to sit back on his heels, panting.

Only then did he see Wade’s cum pearling through the velvet as it dripped onto the carpet. A sight that, combined with his gaping hole, made Cable’s spent cock twitch.

“Jesus, Wade…” 


Without a word, Wade scrambled to his feet and pulled his pants back up before he walked out of the living room.

Leaving a very confused cyborg sitting alone among a mess of wooden shards, blood, plaster, cum and dirt.  

Wade locked himself in the bathroom and sagged against the door, nauseous. His whole body was trembling, head swimming and eyes burning with unshed tears.

He carefully avoided the mirror as he got rid of his clothes; he was in no condition to face his reflection, that night more than any other.

He turned on the shower and sat under the jet, face buried between his arms.

Chapter Text

Cable got to his feet and winced when his knees made a sound eerily close to a boot skidding on gravel.

Through a dream-like haze, he walked stiffly to the kitchen to clean himself with a paper towel before he buttoned his pants back up.

The water was running in the bathroom but he couldn’t hear anything else, not even Wade’s usual brain noise.

Worried, he went to knock on the door hesitantly. “Wade?”

No reply.

He knocked again, louder. “Wade, you alright?”

“Leave me alone,” the merc replied in a brittle voice that made Cable’s heart ache.

The cyborg nibbled on his lip, indecisive. Part of him wanted to ask, to understand, the other, to walk away and never mention this night again unless Wade brought it up.

He sighed, letting his hand drop back to his side.

A smarter man than he was would know what to do in this situation.

And a better man than he was wouldn’t have taken advantage of Wade in the first place; the guy had obviously been too touch-starved to think straight and now he was regretting it.

Cable hoped that he had chosen the right option as he said, “I’ll be in my room if you need anything.”

He left when it became clear that Wade wouldn’t stop him.


Sitting in the bathtub, Wade was watching the bloody furrows that his nails were digging into his forearms heal over and over again, mind completely blank.

He was feeling both empty and overwhelmed. Stuck on the brink of crying without actually being able to cry. Time was suspended and physical sensations nonexistent, no matter how deep he cut into his skin.

Between his feet, the tainted water swirled in the drain, taking away the grime that covered his body but not the filth that covered his soul.

He had just cheated on Vanessa with the guy who had stolen the very symbol of their love, tried to kill an innocent kid, and who was now willingly putting said kid in danger with Wade’s consent .

The merc dragged his hands down his face and looked up at the ceiling as if he was imploring some kind of cosmic, omnipotent entity for help, but he had stopped praying a long time ago.

One deadbeat dad was enough.

Eventually, the water turned cold, helping him come back to himself with a surge of adrenaline. He blinked away the traumatic memories of the ice baths that Weapon X forced him to take daily and got up on shaky legs to wash himself quickly.

Shivering, he toweled himself dry and padded to his room, relieved to see that Cable wasn’t waiting for him for explanations he didn’t have anyway.

All he knew was that he needed to sleep it off. If he could sleep. If not, well... he didn’t keep a gun under his pillow for nothing.

Brain matter was just a pain in the ass to clean up in the morning.

Only when the merc had put on his coziest pajamas and sat down on his bed did he notice the protein bar on his bedside table, next to a bottle of water.

He clenched his fists and took a steadying breath in, but a rebellious tear still rolled down his cheek.  

Cable really wasn’t making it easy to hate him.


Despite his exhaustion, Cable didn’t sleep a lot that night.

He woke up a little before sunrise and decided to take a much-needed shower after checking on Wade; the man was sound asleep in his bed, tightly wrapped up in his blanket like one of those burritos he liked so much.

He had also eaten the protein bar and drank half the bottle of water, so the cyborg closed his bedroom door with a small smile of relief.

But his concern came rushing back when he saw the smudged, bloody fingerprints on each side of the bathtub.

Wade had already healed from his injuries when they were done fucking, which meant these ones were new.

And self-inflicted.

Cable frowned as he added yet another item to the list of questions he had no idea how to ask Wade and cleaned up the stains with hot water.

He really wasn’t looking forward to confronting the merc.

After the shower, Cable put clean clothes on and made some coffee that he sipped while staring darkly at the war-torn living room.

Domino was definitely gonna kill him. Or laugh until she cried. It was 50/50.

He had to admit that the Wade-shaped hole in the side wall was amusing.

Contemplating that mess inevitably brought back memories of the night before, as fresh as Cable’s bruises and split eyebrow.

He remembered the way Wade’s slender body had writhed under him.

The way he had contracted around his cock, spasming with pain and pleasure.

The sounds he had made, each moan, each whimper sexier than the last.

Cable shut down that line of thought before it could make him hard; Wade walking in on him while he had his hand shoved in his shorts in the middle of the kitchen wouldn’t be the best conversation starter.

Speak of the devil, the merc appeared briefly in the corridor as he crossed it to go to the bathroom, yawning loudly. So Cable finished his coffee and set the table for two. Then he sat down, nervously threading his fingers through his hair in a vain attempt to tame it. Fuck, he had forgotten to put gel in it.

Wade strode into the open-space kitchen, his apparent confidence faltering when he caught a glimpse of the living room in broad daylight. He quickly recovered by patting Cable’s T.O. shoulder on his way to the fridge and exclaiming “Gooooood morning, Vietnaaaam!!!”

“ ‘Morning,” the cyborg replied after a beat, puzzled by Wade’s behavior. He had expected anything but... whatever the hell this was.

Wade sat down in front of him and threw his head back to drink milk straight out of the jug. Cable couldn’t help but look at his Adam’s apple bob up and down before he forcefully redirected his entire attention to cutting the bread.

Focus. He needed to focus.

He prepared eight slices and gave half of them to Wade, who naturally didn’t thank him.

“See, you gotta cut them in triangles after you’ve put on the PB and J, or you won’t be able to spread them correctly,” the merc explained like it was rocket science.

His brown eyes widened with horror when he noticed that Cable was eating his slices whole and covered in peanut butter only. “You monster !”

“I don’t like jelly,” Cable shrugged, humoring him in this stupid, idle talk for now. “It’s too sweet.”

“For the sake of our friendship, I will ignore this statement,” Wade said as he pointed at him with his butter knife.

Cable licked his fingers clean and hummed thoughtfully. “Friendship, huh?”

Wade flinched and spread the peanut butter too hard, tearing his bread slice in several places. “Friendship with once-in-a-lifetime benefits,” he amended tensely.

Cable kept his tone as unaffected as possible. “May I ask why?”

“Beats me, you’re a pretty shitty person to be friends with.”

“I was talking about the once part, you stalling bastard!”

Wade put his knife down and for the first time this morning, made eye contact with Cable and actually maintained it.

The intensity of his stare sent a shiver down the cyborg’s spine. It reminded him of the one he had in the Ice Box.

Rage barely kept in check by hopelessness.

Listen , I was hornier than a Texas horned lizard last night and apparently so were you. I scratched your itch, you scratched mine. Tale as old as time.”

Cable suddenly lost his appetite. “So... it could have been anyone but I just happened to be available?”

“You got it. I guess I should thank you since you’re the only one who was willing to fuck my horror show with-”

Wade trailed off abruptly. He blinked and stuffed an entire sandwich in his mouth as if he hadn’t just stopped mid-sentence, eyes cast down. Next to his plate, his free hand was twitching.

“Your girlfriend?” Cable proposed gently.

Wade nodded. He looked like he had gone deep into a bad mental place and the cyborg could only make guesses. Thankfully, he was getting pretty good at it.

Better late than never.

“You feel like you’ve cheated on her?”

“I know I did,” Wade murmured.  

Cable reached for the merc’s hand, but he swiftly pulled it away, so he folded his arms on the tabletop in resignation and sighed, “Wade, you can’t cheat on someone who’s gone. Just like I can’t cheat on someone who’s not born yet.”

Shock and fury crossed the merc’s face. “She’s not gone , she’s waiting for me!!! I’ve seen her, talked to her, every time I’ve died!” He slumped on his chair when he saw the way Cable was looking at him. “... Great, now you think I’m mental.”

“I don’t! I just don’t want you to beat yourself up for stupid shit. I’d rather have you hate me.”


“I already hate you,” Wade muttered. Couldn’t let the fucker forget that just because he had, well, fucked him.

Even though it had been absolutely stellar . Not that he’d ever tell him that.

Cable had a smile that didn’t reach his hazel eyes. “Yeah, I heard you the first time.” He piled the empty plates on top of each other as he added, “You’re not a horror show, Wade. I meant it when I called you handsome at your blind friend’s place. And I meant it at the hospital, for whatever it’s worth.”

The merc’s stomach did a weird flip at that, a sensation not unlike that time the Juggernaut had ripped him in half and left his insides dangling in the air.

Shit. He needed to leave ASAP or he would grab Cable’s ridiculously fluffy hair to pull him into a searing kiss.

Perhaps he could do it with the pretext of testing the efficiency of his lip balm, make sure his lips were as soft as they looked. Science , guys; gives you the right to do anything to any living creature as long as it’s for ‘research’ - which can also be spelled m-o-n-e-y - and nobody gives a single shit. It’s even better than religion. Amen.

“You hear me?” Cable said certainly not for the first time as he snapped his fingers in front of the merc’s face. “Put this in the dishwasher, I’ve got a call.”

Strangely, the desire to kiss him disappeared.


Cable thanked Xavier and hung up. The kitchen was so quiet that he heard the whirring of his TO arm when he stuck his phone back into his pocket.

Wade had tensed as soon as he had heard him pronounce the Professor’s name. He was currently ripping the label off the milk jug with his nails, staring right through it.

“So, we’re really doing this, huh,” he said way too casually for it to sound genuine.

Cable leaned against the counter with a sigh. It wasn’t the first time that he had to compromise someone’s safety for the greater good, far from it, but it didn’t mean he had come to like it.

“Yeah. They put up a fake advert saying they were looking for any way to cure Russell of his powers.” He crossed his arms, snarling as he added, “Apparently, a lot of parents out there would rather not have a child than a mutant one because Xavier said it’s common practice.”

Wade pulled too hard on the label and made the bottle fall. Milk spilled out of it and onto the table, without him making any move to pick it back up.

Cable knew better than to intervene, with the way the merc’s brain waves were simmering in the air. “Anyway… a private number replied to the ad this morning, with a proposition of rendezvous and a load of comforting bullshit like they’re gonna cure him and give them back their ‘real’ son.”

As a parent himself, he couldn’t comprehend how one could choose to get rid of their own child, for any motive but especially for such an insignificant one as the child being different from what they had expected.

It made him want to crush some windpipes with his TO hand.

Wade eventually stood the bottle back up and drank what was left of the milk. Cable took a dishcloth and handed it to him so that he could mop up his mess. Of course, the asshole blatantly ignored him, leaving Cable to wipe the table himself.

Fucking brat.

“When do we drop Russell into yet another set of abusing hands?” Wade inquired with a fake smile. “Just so I know how much time I have to sharpen my katanas and wallow in self-loathing.”

Cable twisted the dishcloth in the sink and rinsed his hands before he sat down with a grunt. His knees were still giving him hell.

“Tomorrow night. We need guns and ammo, lot of’em. We go in hard and fast. No survivors.”

Wade straightened up in his chair and the simmering sound turned into a crackling one as he inhaled deeply through his nose.

Jesus, it really didn’t take much to get his engine revving...

Cable’s knowing smirk turned into a grin when Wade seemed to remember that he could decode him now, at least partially; he jumped to his feet like a spring and headed to his bedroom, throwing over his shoulder, “I’m on the guns and ammo, you put on my cute pink apron and play housewife for a while!”

The cyborg couldn’t even find it in himself to be pissed at Wade as he did just that.


“This is all of it?” Cable asked, standing in front of a rather impressive pile of guns spread out in the living room.

He had thrown away the ruins of the table and the stained carpet in the afternoon, taking the opportunity to go apologize to their downstairs neighbor.

Her awkward smile had let him know that she had no misconceptions about what exactly their fight had turned into and he hadn’t tried to change her mind.

Wade tapped his chin as he reflected on the question before he said aha! and extracted a 9mm from between the couch cushions.

“Jesus, Wade, someone could have got shot in the ass sitting there!” the cyborg scolded him.

“Been there, done that. About as pleasant as it sounds.” Cable frowned at him so he added with a shrug, “In the first movie,” as if it explained anything.

He ignored the merc’s nonsense and ordered, “Alright, take them apart and oil them up good. I’ve got my own gun to take care of and it’s a little more... demanding than those.”

Wade raised a suggestive, hairless, and slightly mocking eyebrow at him.

Cable groaned, “ Not an innuendo, you dirty-minded cunt.”

Even though he had been dying to relieve his frustration all day; it was hard to ignore it when the object of your desires was right there in front of you, clothed in reality but naked in your mind.

Especially when you had already gotten a taste that had left you starving for more, a ‘more’ that would never come.

Cable closed the door of his bedroom behind him and leaned against it with a sigh as he listened to Wade’s pleasant singing on the other side.

Eventually, he would have to learn how to love him from afar, or move out.

Chapter Text

Cable tried not to snarl as Wade left his seat to drape himself over Colossus’s shoulders and squint through the windscreen of the Blackbird.

Only Russell and the actors were highlighted on the infrared screen so far, but the mercenary had apparently detected the armored vehicle coming down the road long before its occupants got out of it.

Fuck , this is such a bad idea,” Wade said, biting his nails. He stood up straight and tapped on the giant’s shoulder. “Alright, beam me down, Scotty! I’m gonna make’em talk.”

Colossus craned his neck to look at Wade. Even sitting, he was still almost at eye-level with him. “We cannot take that risk. These guys are known to take poison as soon as they are caught.”

“Seriously? What year are we, 1942?”

The Russian shrugged.

“Stick to the plan, asshat. Everything’s gonna be alright,” intervened Negasonic, nonchalantly chewing gum. She was Colossus’s co-pilot.

“Oh, if I had a trauma for every time I’ve heard that one, I wouldn’t have so many pennies,” Wade muttered, eyes still glued to the scene below.

The moody teen frowned, trying to decrypt the merc’s words before giving up and zooming in on the screen.

Cable had understood right away. He had probably been living with Wade too long.

“They’re still talking,” Negasonic said with barely disguised boredom.

Wade finally detached himself from Colossus and started pacing back and forth in the Blackbird. Cable could feel the anxiety rolling off him as if it were his own.

“Shit, what if they find the tracker? What if Professor X’s wannabe actors are not playing shitty parents convincingly enough? Oh God, what if Russell gets cold, did he take his jacket?!”

Domino caught the merc’s hand when he moved within arm’s reach, beating Cable to it. “Wade, stop spiralling. We need you focused.” She smiled, adding in a softer voice, “Besides, luck is on our side, remember?”

Wade took a deep breath in and nodded jerkily. Domino didn’t let go of his hand.

“They are moving,” Colossus declared before he pushed a series of buttons.

Sure enough, four of the orange silhouettes disappeared from the infrared screen as they climbed into the vehicle and headed south.

Negasonic activated another screen and Russell’s GPS signal appeared on the map. “Tracker fully operational!”

Wade let out a shaky sigh and went back to his seat.


“You gotta be kidding me, their not-so-secret-anymore facility is in Penn’s mommyfucking forest ?!” Wade exclaimed.

“I’m surprised you know what ‘Pennsylvania’ means,” Negasonic sneered.

“Well, I did take eighth grade Spanish, thank you very much.”

The teenager raised an eyebrow at him, torn between laughing and seriously worrying about Wade’s language skills.

Cable huffed , making both of them turn to stare at him. “What?” he said, immediately putting his macho-man scowl back on.

Which was endearing, in an infuriating way.

“Nothing, I’m just not used to hearing people laugh at my jokes. People who aren’t sitting behind a screen, I mean,” Wade replied, staring right at you.

“Who the hell are you talk-”

“They went in. You can go,” Colossus announced as he put the Blackbird in stationary at a safe distance from the facility. “Negasonic and I will join you as soon as we find suitable place to land.”

Wade unbuckled his belt and jumped to his feet, adrenaline already pumping through his veins.

“Any strong wind advisory we should know about?” he asked as he unwound the rope and dropped it down the hatchway, letting it dangle between the sea of trees below.

Domino threw him a disapproving look, arms crossed over her chest.

“Too soon?”

“I’m pretty sure that joking about your dead team will always be ‘too soon’, Wade.”

The merc escaped this awkward - but well-deserved - conversation by sliding down the rope until he was close enough to the ground to let go, his landing cushioned by a mix of pine needles and soft dirt.

Holy shit, it felt like stepping on marshmallows.

When Domino and Cable were at his side, he sniffed the fresh air and sighed happily, “Haaaaa, do you smell this?!”

They both imitated him, cocking their gun as silently as possible while they looked all around them, squinting. “What is it?”

“Nothing! No pollution, no piss, no trash rotting on the sidewalks… really makes the hunter-gatherer instinct kick in. Didn’t even know I had it in me.”

Cable rolled his eyes and started marching towards the facility. “Jesus… From now on, only talk when you have something useful to say. Something relating to our mission .”

“Sir, yes, sir!” Wade replied mockingly with a military salute.

“What happened to your face, anyway?” Domino asked the cyborg as she put on her night vision goggles. The moon was shining bright above them but the forest was denser than Bryan, Wade’s inbred cousin, and not everyone’s mutation included superhuman vision.  

“I taught him the importance of consent,” the merc said proudly.

“That’s not what happened, you asshole!!!”

Wade ignored Cable and whispered into Domino’s ear. “He totally made a move on me. Poor guy’s got it bad .”

“I don’t remember you complaining about my moves...” Cable growled.

Let’s interrupt this riveting banter with a very necessary description, because honestly? Cable was absolutely terrifying in the dark.

And hypnotizing; only a glint of his eyes, teeth or metal sinews appeared alternatively as they caught the moonlight just right.

Last but not least, he was cradling his amazing, huge gun with an almost lover-like intensity.

Thank God Wade was too anxious to be horny or he would have climbed the cyborg like a vine on the spot.

Sadly, he would have to wait some more before he could cross ‘outdoor sex’ off his kinky list.

Maybe even forever, considering his tendency to hold grudges.

Domino shook her head and walked a little faster to get ahead of them. “Oh God, okay, this is so much more information than I bargained for. Forget I asked.”

Shit, had he said any of that aloud?


Cable shot the guard on the left, Wade the one on the right, while Domino took down the drones patrolling around the imposing building. She only had to hit one and it swirled in the air until it crashed conveniently against the other.

Everything was one stone, two birds, to her.

With the entrance now clear, the cyborg took a glove off one of the guards and pressed the dead man’s hand against the scanner. The armored door opened, revealing an empty corridor. As much as the outside of the facility looked like a dark, old mansion, the interior was nothing but modern, sanitized white. Stepping into it felt like changing dimensions.

“I fucking hate hospitals,” Wade muttered next to him, barely audible.

Cable wanted to pat his back.

He didn’t.

Instead, he looked up and saw a camera pointed right at them, its red light glowing menacingly. It had to be connected to the control room.

Wade followed his gaze and proposed, “Want me to give you a leg up?”

Cable could hear his smirk through the mask. Asshole. Not his fault the ceiling was so fucking high.

He grunted in assent and Wade put one knee on the ground, Cable’s left foot in his palms, the right one on his shoulder.

“No... more... pancakes... for... you,” the merc said through gritted teeth, struggling under the cyborg’s weight.

“Fuck you,” Cable replied distractedly as he ripped the camera off and grabbed the wires with his TO hand. The entire network appeared in an orange holographic projection above his metal arm. He followed the wires until he reached the node.

“Control room’s in the first basement.”

Wade let him down, making a show of massaging his wrists and shoulder with pained noises. Cable rolled his eyes as a group of guards appeared at the end of the corridor, wearing what looked like anti-riot gear and holding assault rifles.

He didn’t waste any time and blasted them backward with his gun.

The men hit the wall with unforgiving violence before they crumbled into a disarticulated mass of limbs on the floor.

Domino whistled, impressed.

“That gun is amazing,” Wade said, a little breathless.

His brain waves were crackling faintly.


Wade took off his mask and put his mangled face barely an inch away from the guard’s bloodied one.

Predictably, the man recoiled in fear and tried to avoid the merc’s stare.

“Open the door right now or I’m gonna scrub you all over with a cheese grater then drop you in a bathtub full of salt until your fucking skin looks like mine!” Wade shouted, punching him for good measure.

“Okay, okay, I’ll do it, please, stop!” the guard whimpered, coughing blood.

Wade let go of the man’s collar and he entered the control room door code with shaky fingers.

“Thank you for your cooperation,” Wade said in a lighthearted tone before he shot the guy point blank.

Damn , that felt good. But never say that to your therapist or they will call the cops on you. Talking from experience, here.

Domino easily disposed of the nerds in the control room and Cable sat down in front of the multiple computer screens.

“Kids are kept in the second basement. But some are currently being experimented on in the labs upstairs.”

On one of the screens, a little girl was strapped to a table, plenty of tubes sticking out of her frail body. She was staring blankly at the ceiling as scientists moved around her.

Wade’s blood boiled with rage. “Where’s Russell?”

“Basement... in a high security, individual cell,” Cable said as soon as he located him. “Want me to come with you?”

The kindness in his voice made Wade’s stomach do a weird flip so he purposefully didn’t meet his gaze.

“No, you and Dom go to the labs and get all Splinter Cell on the scientists; you know me, I don’t do finesse.” He paused. “Can the cells be opened manually?”

“No, only from here.”

“Ok, so don’t open the cells until I’m done, I don’t want any stray bullets hitting a kid.”

Cable nodded.

“No worries, I’ll be quicker than a virgin,” Wade winked before he ran out of the room.


Three guys were patrolling in the second basement, all armed with electric staffs. Did the Ice Box have a weapon trade deal with this facility or what? That’s lazy writing.

Wade unsheathed his katanas - because he had been a little bit too enthusiastic with his firearms and was therefore out of ammo - and stepped into the light.

“Excuse me, do you know where the restrooms are? I ate a taco on my way here and went too hard on the hot sauce, if you know what I mean...”

The guards jumped and activated their staffs, closing in on him. “Drop your weapons and get down on your knees!” yelled one of them.

“Oh, not before you offer me a drink, baby,” Wade said in a low, dangerous voice, twirling the blades in his hands.

Cue the music .

He avoided the first guard’s attack by jumping over him and beheading him in one swift motion, blood squirting out of the severed neck like a gross, organic squirt gun.

The other guys looked at each other and dropped their staffs to pull out their rifles instead.

“Ow, ow, ow, ow !” Wade exclaimed as he pepperoni-sliced one guy while the other was emptying his magazine on him with a look of perplexed horror on his face, not understanding why the fuck his target wasn’t going down.

Heh. Blowjob pun continuity.

Wade cursed when the bullets managed to knock his katanas out of his hand, as well as take off his index and middle finger.

Ow , come on, those were my favorite ones!” he complained before he did a barrel roll to grab a corpse and hold it in front of him like a shield, ears ringing.

His vision was blurry and he was bleeding profusely. He couldn’t die, but he could faint , and it. just. wouldn’t. do.

Not when everyone was counting on him.

He extended his leg to pull an electric staff towards him with his the tip of his boot, crying out when a bullet exploded his kneecap.

That guard had an annoyingly good aim.

“Bullseye, is that you?”

Of course the man didn’t reply, just kept on shooting, determined to turn Wade into Swiss cheese. The merc gritted his teeth and used his last strength to throw the corpse on him.

The guard fell down with a grunt, his rifle sliding across the cement floor. He barely had time to push his teammate’s corpse off before Wade planted the staff into his chest and activated it.

“Pika pika, motherfucker,” Wade breathed out as the guy convulsed, electrocuted to death.


Cable smiled as he watched Wade take down the last remaining guard on the screen, pride swelling in his chest. A pride that was totally misplaced since Wade wasn’t his in any way.

Still, he couldn’t help but think, that’s my boy .

He unlocked the cells and left the control room with Domino to rush upstairs.

The more Cable witnessed the woman’s fighting style, the more he believed in luck. She only had to lay a pen on the floor for a scientist to slip on it and break their neck on the closest desk.

Not possessing that power, the cyborg could only creep up on them and slit their throats with his knife, holding them down as they bled out.

Messier, but just as effective.

It took them a little less than fifteen minutes to clear the two remaining upstairs levels. Colossus and Negasonic were waiting for them at ground level, extracting the kids out of the elevator as Domino sent them down.

Cable stayed behind, downloading as much data as he could from the scientists’ computers for further analysis.

That was, until the screen went black, and a countdown appeared in red numbers.

-05:00

His breathing hitched. He tried to override the program, to no avail.

-04:36

“Fuck.” He jumped to his feet and ran to warn Domino. “The whole place’s gonna blow in four minutes!” he told her, wiping the sweat off his brow with his scarf.

“Oh no, Wade’s still downstairs with the other kids!” she replied.

Cable cursed and pushed Domino and the unconscious girl she was carrying into the elevator ahead of him, pressing the ‘G’ button.

“I’ll get him.”


“Don’t worry, kids, we’ll get you out of here soon,” Wade said to the dozen of little mutants staring at him with wide eyes. Russell was among them, looking at him like he had hung the moon.

It was probably the residual effects of the tranquilizer they used on him because Wade sure as hell didn’t deserve admiration.

He turned back to the elevator. It was still occupied.

Something in the back of his mind was screaming at him to find another way out.

“Does any of you know if there are stairs, here? An emergency exit?”

The kids shook their head. “Okay, it’s okay,” he said, for them or himself, he didn’t know. He paced along the bare, concrete walls, trying to find a hidden door, a secret panel, anything.

Fucking finally , the elevator doors opened and Cable appeared.

Uh oh. That was not a ‘mission accomplished’ face right there.

The cyborg quickly walked through the crowd of children to grab Wade’s arm and whisper, “Everything’s gonna blow up in two minutes, we gotta move!”

Wade felt an icy shiver go down his spine. “ Fuck , I knew something was off. It was way too easy, even for a fanfic,” he said as he guided the kids into the elevator, Cable helping.

“No, I’m not going without you, Wade!” Russell protested when it was his turn.

Wade took off his mask, ignoring how the other kids flinched.

“Russell, I swear now is not the time to pull that teenage rebellion shit on me! Cable and I can’t go with you or we’d reach the maximum weight limit. So get in there and run as fast as you can to Colossus.”

He brushed Russell’s damp hair out of his eyes with his relatively intact hand. “Listen, you did great, kid. I love you. Now go!”

Wade stepped out of the elevator right before the doors closed on Russell, a look of pure shock across his adorable, chubby face.

Cable didn’t say anything while they waited, but he was working his jaw like he wanted to and kept refraining himself over and over.

Wade wanted to scream at him to spit it out already.

“Time left?” he asked instead when they got in the elevator.

The cyborg looked down at his metal arm. “Thirty seconds.”

“It’s fine ,” Wade smiled, “We all know what I can do in thirty seconds.”

Cable returned his smile. There were crinkles around his eyes and something akin to fondness in them.  

Wade cleared his throat and stared back at the numbers above the door.

They weren’t gonna die.

No need to get all sappy and regretful.

They barely had time to run out of the elevator when a detonation shook the whole facility from deep within its foundations, making the white lights flicker ominously.

“Hurry!” Colossus shouted at them from the exit, four kids perched on his shoulders. Wade barely resisted the urge to make an Iron Giant reference.

He sprinted, Cable at his side. The floor was moving beneath their feet, tipping back and sinking underground with every passing second. The corridor seemed endless, like they were running in a dream.

There was a second explosion and a massive crack appeared on the ceiling right above them, dust seeping out of it.

At this instant, Wade realized three things.

  1. The upper levels were gonna crash down on them.
  2. Only one of them would make it to the exit in time.
  3. He didn’t want to be the one to make it to the exit in time.

Funny how history repeats itself .

Wade stopped dead in his tracks and let Cable run past him before he kicked him out of the way of a huge chunk of ceiling that would have instantly killed him.

The merc didn’t feel any pain as it crushed his entire body from the chest down but the sickening sound of bones shattering had him retching.

He puked blood all over the floor, incapable of moving or breathing.

“Wade, no !!!” Cable yelled as soon as he saw him, pushing himself back up.

The fool tried to save him, protecting his head from the rain of debris with his cybernetic shield, before Colossus snaked his arm into the entrance like a kid with a dollhouse and picked the cyborg up by the nape of his neck.

Relief flowed over Wade, as well as a comforting warmth, which he knew the meaning of all too well.

His vision darkened, black eating at the edges until nothing remained but the blurry silhouette of Cable thrashing in Colossus’ grip.

The merc craned his neck to keep looking up at him and thought as clearly as he could, You’re welcome.

He let his head fall forward into the puddle of his own blood and died with a smile on his lips.

Chapter Text

‘You...wel...come’

Cable heard the snarky goodbye projected from Wade’s dying brain and caught a glimpse of his weak smile, right before the mercenary disappeared completely under the rubble.

Frantic rage and urgency filled the cyborg, making his body tremble and his left eye flare. He freed himself from Colossus’ grip by forcing one metal finger open after the other with his telekinesis and landed heavily on his feet.

“Cable, stop, it is too late!” the Russian yelled, grief transparent in his tone and mind.

Cable knew that all too well, recognized the bitter taste of it in the back of his throat. He couldn’t do anything but stare at the building collapsing in on itself, as dust and smoke rose into the air to obscure the night sky.

So he did. He pulled his tactical scarf over his nose and waited at a safe distance for the ruins to stabilize themselves, stoic only on the outside.

He barely noticed Colossus and the rest of the team leaving with the kids.

All he could focus on was the memory of Wade’s smile, branded into his mind. How genuine it had seemed, joyful even.

An icy shiver ran down Cable’s spine.

He remembered Wade with watery eyes, the morning after their fight, telling him that he had seen his girlfriend every time he had died.

If it was true, he couldn’t blame the merc for welcoming death so easily; he would too, if it meant getting to hold his daughter again.

Which made him hoping that Wade would come back all the more selfish.

Eventually, silence resumed its reign in the clearing and the stars shone bright again.

Cable walked towards the ruins of the building, where the entrance had stood  mere minutes ago. He gritted his teeth as he started picking up chunks of debris and throwing them aside, using his telekinesis as a second pair of hands to double his efficacy.

He worked until his vision blurred and his muscles shook with exhaustion. The TO virus felt its host weaken and started gnawing at their junction, spreading itself.

Cable punched a nearby piece of wall with his TO arm, cracks appearing in the shape of a spiderweb.

If he continued, he would lose control and turn into a monster.

He had been staring at his fists in defeat, kneeling among the ruins for God knows how long, when a big, silver hand gently squeezed his flesh shoulder.

Cable looked up at Colossus, who was smiling at him, pupil-less eyes somehow conveying compassion and optimism.  “Rest, I will take it from here,” he said, his skin gleaming like platinum under the moonlight.

In this moment, Cable vaguely understood why Wade loved the mutant so much. He put his jealousy aside and accepted Colossus’ help with a noncommittal grunt, moving to let the giant haul the rubble out of the way.

He knew Colossus had found Wade when he heard him retch.


“Home, sweet home!” Wade exclaimed as he burst through the door of his old apartment. Vanessa looked at him from her armchair, eyebrows shooting up. He quickly crossed the distance separating them and gasped when he walked through a shimmering wall of magic that turned him back into his old, handsome self.

However, he didn’t have the time or the interest to dwell on the weird phenomenon because there she was, standing up to greet him, as beautiful as the night she died, bathed in the warm sunlight pouring from the window on her right.

Wade smiled at her, blinded and giddy, as she slowly raised her hand to… slap him across the face.

Ow !” The merc said, touching his burning cheek. He glanced down. “... Is it wrong that I have a semi?”

“Wade Wilson, what the fuck are you doing?!” Vanessa asked, shutting down his enthusiasm completely.

He frowned, confused. “What do you mean?”

“I said ‘don’t fuck Colossus’ , I never said anything about Cable !”

He blinked like a glitching Furby. “I-I-I’m sorry, what ?”

Vanessa’s eyes widened in realization and her expression lost some of its fury. “Oh, of course you don’t remember. It never happened in your current timeline since Cable saved your life.” She jabbed a finger in his chest with renewed anger. “Life you wasted stupidly!”

Wade stroked her arms, nearly crumbling in relief at how real, tangible she felt under his fingertips. “Ness, I don’t understand a word of what you’re saying but I’m sure you have a good reason to be as angry as you are.”

“I’m angry because you’ve shat all over someone who genuinely cares about you for me . Come on, I thought you knew me better than that?! I want you to be happy, Wade! Even if your happiness doesn’t include me anymore.” She pursed her lips. “ Can’t include me anymore.”

Wade took a step back.

This was so not going as planned. Where was the moving soundtrack, the kisses, the inside jokes?

Vanessa sighed at his dismay, her shoulders slumping slightly. “Okay, I’m gonna need to repeat myself. You know Cable went back in time to save your life, right? Before he did, you were here, just like now, and I told you that it wasn’t the right time for us, that they still needed you. Your family. And Cable.”

Wade bristled at the distinction she made. As if she knew Cable wasn’t quite family, but then... what was he, exactly? A fine piece of ass, first, and a pain in the ass, second.

“You’re sure he’s really into me?” Wade asked, his voice smaller than intended.

Vanessa snorted, her mouth stretching into a lopsided smile. “Honey, I’ve had a seat in the front row all along and I’m positive he is. Please , the pining is killing me.”

Wade paused, thoughtful. “That means you’ve seen us…” He made a circle with his thumb and forefinger and repeatedly slid his other index finger into it.

“Uh-huh.”

He raised his eyebrows, and damn, had he missed those too. “Kinky.”

Vanessa smiled before she pulled him down into a deep, bittersweet kiss. His knees almost buckled under him as he felt like he was being torn in half, this time only metaphorically.

When they parted, he sniffled, choking up, “I-I don’t know if I can... again , you know? I don’t know what to do, Ness, I miss you so bad...”

She cupped his face and wiped away a tear that he had failed to hold back. “Give him a chance. And more importantly, give yourself a chance. You still have time. He does too. Don’t waste it.”

He took a wavering breath in and made sure to memorize every detail of her face while he still could. “I love you.”

“I know,” she grinned.

Wade almost came on the spot. “ Ngh , Empire!!!”


Cable frowned judgingly at Colossus for emptying his stomach a few feet away, before he went to evaluate Wade’s state for himself.

Okay, fine, his reaction was justified. The cyborg looked away by reflex, clenching his jaw.

He had seen hundreds of corpses during his life, but never like that , and none that he had loved.

The word caught him off guard, and he almost snickered for admitting it now, of all times.

He sighed. It didn’t matter, Wade didn’t love him back and it was too late anyway.

He grabbed the body bag Colossus had brought and started scooping up Wade’s remains, breathing through his mouth. The Russian eventually grew a pair and helped him.

They worked in silence, both of them not daring to ask the question that was hanging in the air like a suffocating cloud.

Could he heal from that?

Cable spent the whole flight back to New York scrubbing the little bits of gore out of the gaps of his TO fingers, trying very hard not to think about what, or rather who they were. He could sense Domino’s repulsion from where he was sitting, but she still came up to him with a couple of tissues.

He thanked her gruffly and went back to his gruesome task, regularly eyeing the body bag laid on the floor. Part of him expected Wade to jump out of it at any time with a lame joke, but so far there had been zero brain activity; the cyborg made sure to keep his focus on the deafening silence, where white noise should be.

Used to be.

“I will be upstairs if you need anything,” Colossus told him on the threshold of the X-mansion infirmary. It wasn’t the one for students, and it looked more like a refurbished morgue.

Cable smiled mirthlessly. “Thank you.”

The giant nodded and walked away, his heavy steps echoing in the starkly-lit corridor.

Cable laid the body bag down on one of the empty beds and winced at the sloshy noise it made. He held his breath as he unzipped it to rearrange some of the recognizable parts together, until it somehow looked like a human body. Then he zipped it close, leaving only a few inches open for air, and left the infirmary.

He had been given a room on the teachers floor so he could stay and watch over Wade for as long as necessary. But he spent most of his time downstairs, sipping from beer cans that a group of older students hadn’t hidden well enough.

Waiting.

On the second day of silence, Cable gave up. He balled his fists and pushed himself up, burying the guilt and the rage deep inside, compartmentalizing. Though ‘repressing’ would be closer to the truth.

Because how do you process the fact that you’re stranded in the past without the only person who made it bearable?

Cable had his hand on the handle of the door when he heard it.

A faint noise, like a lighter being struck.

His breath hitched in his throat and he jogged back to Wade’s body, leaning over it to listen better. And sure enough, sparks were flaring, tiny jolts of a consciousness reconstructing itself.

Muted, but undeniably there.

Cable sat back at Wade’s bedside, shaking.

“You fucking bastard.”


Wade woke up with a loud gasp, for Cable to backhand him immediately.

Fuck . I missed you too, honeycomb,” the merc said, massaging his throbbing jaw. Was it Slap Your Boyfriend Day or what?

“Pull that stunt again and I’ll throw you into an industrial mixer and keep your remains in a bottle of sulfuric acid forever ,” Cable fumed, waving a threatening finger at him.

There were dark circles under his eyes and his breath reeked of beer. The rest of him didn’t smell any better... Hang on, that was Wade himself; death makes you release a lot of unsexy fluids after all, but you already know that if you read Stephen King.

Wade looked back at Cable. How was he so menacingly hot in this shitty lighting and how long had he been watching over him?

Quite a while, judging from the book and the empty cans lined up on the bedside table.

“I gotta say, you need to work on your dirty talk,” Wade joked, a little breathless.

Cable squinted adorably. “It’s not dirty t-”

Wade interrupted him by hauling him in for a  kiss, surprising both the cyborg and himself.

“What the hell was that?” Cable asked as he pulled away hastily, his voice raspier than normal.

Wade tilted his head. “Kissing? You don’t kiss in the future? Dreadful mononucleosis outbreak?”

“I know what kissing is, idiot, I’m just… confused.”

Cable kept scanning his face with a frown, trying to find an explanation somewhere on it, and Wade actually felt guilty . If that wasn’t proof that he gave way too many fucks about the cyborg, he didn’t know what it was.

He fidgeted with the zipper of the body bag he was still lying in, running it up and down repeatedly. “Yeaaaah, I’m kinda giving you mixed signals, aren't I.”

“Indeed.”

There was resentment in that low, ASMR voice, but Wade didn’t want to talk, to explain, all he wanted was Taco Bell, and perhaps to suck Cable off, if he didn’t kill him before that.

As if on cue, his stomach gurgled loudly in the awkward silence.

Cable huffed and got to his feet, leaving the room without a look behind him. His tone was carefully flat when he said, “I’ll tell Colossus you’re awake. Meet me at the apartment whenever you’re ready, we gotta talk.”

Wade didn’t protest. He knew Cable was right, he just wished he could skip this step, and probably so do you.

The merc got out of the bag and stood, shivering in the cold, sterile room. He wobbled on his legs as his vision swam and barely made it to a sink in time to puke up the residual blood and dust caught in his stomach.

Ugh, resurrection hangover was the worst.

“It is good to see you again!” a familiar Russian voice exclaimed, a few moments later.

Wade glanced at Colossus with a self-deprecating smile, still clutching the sink rim. “Even naked and covered in grime?”

The giant came to put a bathrobe over his bare shoulders, so gently that he almost flinched away. Fuck, he must still have some dust in his eyes because they were prickling a lot, suddenly.

“Yes, even like that, Wade. Come, I’ll make you dinner while you take shower.”

A thunk reverberated in the room as the merc hugged Colossus so hard he swayed backward.


The sun was setting when Cable heard a knock on the front door. He inhaled deeply before he left the couch to open it, already knowing who was on the other side.

“Hey! I got tacos and the cow piss you claim is beer,” Wade announced, brandishing an armful of takeaway bags.

Cable rolled his eyes and stepped aside to let him in.

The merc’s borrowed outfit was an eyesore; a flowery, yellow shirt with blue jeans too tight for him and a pair of worn out, red sneakers. At least his ass looked amazing, from the one glance he couldn’t help but cast.

He closed the door and joined Wade in the kitchen, remaining silent as he watched him take out more food than two adults could ever consume in one sitting.

“What? Jesus’ fuel is the Holy Spirit, mine is carbs,” the merc shrugged. He didn’t say anything else as he sat down and started stuffing his face.

Cable sat across from him and grabbed one of the many tacos. He wasn’t particularly fond of Mexican food but he had learnt not be difficult in the post-apocalyptic future.

Wade looked at anything but him during the entire meal. Unfortunately for the merc, Cable was extremely patient when he had his sights set on something.  

Or in this case, some one .

“I’ve never wanted to crawl out of my skin more than right now, and that says a lot when you look like me,” Wade eventually sighed, wiping his mouth clean, “but I owe you some answers.”

Cable perked up as the merc held his gaze, swallowed, and confessed, “I… am Iron Man.”

“Jesus,” the cyborg shook his head angrily, “I should have expected this.” He crushed the empty packaging of the taco in his hands so as to not crush something else.

How could he be stupid enough to think he’d be able to have a real conversation with the merc, for once?

He grabbed a beer and stood, about to storm out of the kitchen when Wade blurted out a desperate, “Wait!”

Cable stilled and looked back at him, and his big, brown, droopy eyes. Oh, how he hated them in this moment...

“Look, I’m doing my best here, okay?! I’m not- I don’t- Fuck !” Wade spat frustratedly, gaze dropping to the floor.

Seeing him at a loss for words was a first, and in any other circumstances, Cable would have enjoyed the hell out of it.

But not right now.

He sighed and sat back down in front of him, lacing his hands together on the table in an effort to look more composed than he felt. Searched for the right words.

“I get it. It’s hard for me too.” He ignored Wade’s lewd expression at that. “All I know is that I like your insufferable self. Have from the start.”

The merc gaped at him in shock.

Cable carried on, unperturbed. “The question is, do you like me back? Or am I just a cock to bounce on when your vibrator’s not enough?”

He had tried to keep the venom out of his voice, he really had. Wade didn’t seem hurt by his snide remark anyway, just… baffled. The white noise coming from his brain was almost deafening in the silent kitchen.

Wade eventually snapped out of whatever trance he was in and asked with a smile, “ Can you hear the voices sing?

Cable frowned, worried about the merc’s mental health. “What? What voices?”

Wade jumped swiftly over the table, pivoting on his right hand before he landed in Cable’s lap, the metal chair creaking menacingly under their combined weight.

“The fuck are y-”

The merc’s lips crashed against his, bruising.


The muffled grunt Cable let out was music to Wade’s ears so he kept kissing him, until a metal hand closed around his throat and held him still a few inches away from the cyborg’s face.

The intensity of his mismatched eyes made Wade whimper more than the pressure on his neck.

“Will you push me away in the morning, again?” Cable asked low and dangerous, but the fearful hope in his expression was obvious.

“Only if you don’t fuck me well enough,” Wade breathed out, clawing uselessly at the mechanical forearm.

Cable’s lips curled into a smirk. He stood up, his hands slipping under Wade’s ass to carry him easily into his bedroom. Victorious, the merc giggled and threw a thumb up in the general direction of Heaven.

Enjoy the show, baby .

His enthusiasm was sadly short-lived, because Cable lowered him down onto the bed, as if he was fragile and Wade was having none of that shit. “What am I, a virgin maiden from the 1600s on the first night of her arranged marriage?”

The cyborg shrugged as he took off Wade’s sneakers with a mischievous smile. “If that gets your rocks off, sure.”

“Zip it and stop pampering me!” Wade yelled, kicking Cable in his metal side. “Ow, my toe,” he sobbed, holding his foot.

Cable all but laughed . “God, I’ve missed that.”

The merc squinted at him suspiciously. “What?”

“Your goofiness.” Cable straddled his hips, pinning him down like a butterfly on display before he started unbuttoning his shirt. “Your smile.” He bent over to kiss him, exploring his mouth with his tongue as he pushed the piece of clothing off his shoulders. “Your eyes.” He kissed his eyelids, one after the other.

Wade was seconds away from self combusting at this point, his heart wedged high in his throat. “I-I get the idea, now please shut the fuck up and fuck me up.”

Cable chuckled darkly. “Oh, I’m gonna fuck you up alright, just not the way you’d like.”

Wade swallowed nervously, feeling all his blood run south at the threat. Or was it a promise?

The cyborg glanced at his crotch and scooted down just enough to take off Wade’s jeans, leaving him entirely naked.

And suddenly everything became clear. “This is payback, isn’t it?”

Cable smiled. “It is.” He made a show of taking off his khaki t-shirt and sweatpants, and Wade’s mouth watered at the tenting in the front of his white boxers.

“You like it rough, so I’m gonna give it to you soft instead.”

Holy shitsticks . “Well, if you think I’m gonna let you, you’re a lot dumber than I look,” he mumbled, not knowing what to focus on as the cyborg crawled back onto him, his metal arm whirring as it supported his upper body weight.

Then Cable ran his callused hand along the inside of Wade’s thighs, meanly avoiding his hard-on before continuing all the way up to his chest. There, he thumbed his left nipple until it slowly protruded out of the thick mesh of scars, and it took everything out of Wade not to squirm.

He unfortunately did when Cable pulled the hard nub between his teeth and sucked , he even squealed.

“Don’t hold back, I love hearing your voice…” Cable whispered as he started pumping his cock lazily, planting reverent, open-mouthed kisses all over his chest and throat.

Great, now the author’ll have to add the tag ‘body worship’ just because of him.

“You muffin smuggler dragon fart,” Wade gasped, but he could already feel his resistance fade away with the remnants of his intellect. He melted on the mattress as the cyborg treated him like something sacred, something good , and tears soon rolled out of Wade’s eyes.

He came, once, then Cable flipped him on his stomach and without giving him any time to recover, slipped his index finger inside him, somehow coated in lube that he hadn’t registered him getting, and then something much better and much larger replaced it, filling him up so perfectly that all he could do was bite into the pillow with a delightful cry.


Hypnotized, Cable stared at the muscles of Wade’s back undulating like snakes before him, strength and grace in perfect balance, as all things should be.

How subdued the merc was in this moment, not joking or spurting incomprehensible things, but just taking it , completely silent and relaxed.

“Jesus, look at you... you’re putty in my hands… if I had known this was all it took to get you to shut up I would have fucked you this way sooner,” Cable grunted as he pounded into him, straddling his thighs and keeping his asscheeks pushed apart, fingers digging into the textured flesh.

Wade just moaned in response, his hips bucking faintly to try and get some friction on his cock, in vain. Cable took pity and sat back on the bed to gather the fucked-out merc in his lap. The change of position ripped a loud groan out of him, which ended in a gargle when Cable reached for his dick. It was still hard and leaking, as red as his suit.

He gritted his teeth and thrust up into Wade, closing his eyes as the melody of whimpers and crackling fire lulled him, keeping a steady pace until the merc spilled all over his fist a second time, clenching almost painfully around him. Cable followed with a growl and a bite on the bulk of Wade’s shoulder.

He lowered them both back onto the bed and slid out of the merc to roll on his back, panting. Wade cursed into the sheets before crawling up to him and lying across the part of his chest not devoured by the TO virus.

Without thinking, Cable kissed his hairless head, a pang in his heart when Wade inched himself down just enough to keep the cyborg from doing it a second time. But he accepted it and settled back against the pillow.

A comfortable silence fell over them, dulling everything left unsaid, everything yet to be done.

The calm in the eye of a storm they would soon have to learn to navigate, a short and undeserved respite in a life of fights and losses, but in this moment, nothing mattered more than the way their bodies fit so perfectly against each other.

Wade traced the rosy scar above Cable’s navel with his index finger, brow knitted in something eerily close to worry. “I don’t wanna fall for you,” he mumbled thickly into the cyborg’s pec, before the latter had the chance to ask him what was wrong.  

Cable chuckled softly and held the merc closer.

“Don’t fall for me, then,” he replied as he gently massaged Wade’s scalp, fingertips grazing the tip of his ears with each stroke. Wade shivered and melted further into his embrace.


Aaand shit.

Failed step one.