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The Stars, They Shine for Us

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Entry 1
Snow is like love. It appears with a few warning signs but usually not expected. It melts away after a while, but maybe it stays longer if the conditions are right. Falling snow is like the stars are slowly drifting down to the Earth. The stars are snow but the snow is not the star.

He knew this. He always had. Every sport had its stars and it's snow. The stars that fall apart. He was once a star but now, nothing more than a petty snowflake while the true stars appear. While the star of his heart stole the hearts of people all over the world. What could he possibly do that could reverse the ways of gravity?

~~~
Entry 2

Vincent was right. Diaries do help. He sits in the cool dark stairwell of his hotel now, writing an entry into his diary that he has now started because of his own star. He, Nathan Chen, was turning into snow, while the person that stole his heart becomes a star. And you know, he was okay with that. He was okay with becoming the background skater if it meant that Vincent would take over for him. He would be the one trying to reach the other skater. He would gladly become the snow for the true stars to take over.

~~~

“Nathan… Nathan. Nathan. NATHAN!”
Oh. He’s standing there. I peer up the teenager standing above me. I then return my gaze to the breakfast I’d been having a staring contest with.
“Are you even listening to me?”
I was but he didn’t need to know that I was.
“You’re not are you?”
Don’t think that of me, Vince. I’d listen to you even if you sprouting nonsense words.
“Well, I’m going to the rink for practice. You can join me if you want.”
That catches my attention. Skating with Vincent on the ice with m is just as pleasant as skating alone. In fact, I’d say it’s better because he will give me honest feedback. And he’s just amazing to watch. I’m now watching him so he’ll elaborate his plans for the ice.
“That caught your attention.” A smirk. “I’ll meet you at the exit in 10 minutes.”
With that Vincent disappears just like he had materialized a few minutes ago. I push away my uneaten breakfast with not a care in the world and rush out the door, almost knocking over an unexpecting Team Japan over on my way out. I rush to my room to collect all my training gear in time. I run around randomly finding things I’ll need, along with a lot of things I didn’t. Finally, I fished my skates out of the corner they were currently occupying. With not a moment to spare I rushed back out again almost murdering someone. This person calls out from somewhere behind me, “Going somewhere, kid?”
Ahh, that was Adam. “Sorry!” I yell back at him.
With not a spare second I arrive at the door where the star himself was waiting, playing a game on his phone. “Geometry Dash? Seriously? Who still actually plays this?”
Vincent gives me an extremely displeased look. “I do, and you just killed me. I was going to bet that level!”
I shrug and grab his hand, dragging him out the door as I determinedly walk to the rink. “Let’s go, Nerd.”
He’s complaining. Again. I should care. I don’t. I continue on my merry way. Not a care in the world.

 

~~~

Entry 3

Practice wasn’t terrible. I probably should have spent more time practicing my own free skate instead of watching Vincent but what can I say? He’s an angel. A beautiful, graceful, majestic… Okay, I need to stop. I admit it. I’m in love. And I’m obsessed, but I can’t help it. Who doesn’t fall in love with him?

~~~

My free skate was a redemption. I was finally happy with my performance at the Olympics. Yuzuru, Shoma, and Javi deserved their medals though, but I still think Vincent should have been higher. He channels his music in a beautiful way that makes me stop breathing every time I watch it. Maybe I’m biased when I watch it but I can’t help myself, his skating is just that beautiful and amazing and graceful and elegant and STOP IT BRAIN! Just stop thinking about him for one minute! Gosh, it really isn’t that hard and you know it. I make my way back to my apartment/room in the Olympic Village. I just needed to get Vincent out of my head. That’s not going to be easy considering we both live in the same apartment.
“Curse you, Olympic Village! Why did you make me share with the other skaters? Why couldn’t I share with the snowboarders or someone?”
“I don’t think that complaining to a building with help you with whatever problems you’re currently having.”
I whirl around. Just my luck, someone heard my rant to a wall. Adam is standing behind me with a stupid smirk on his face.
“Have something you’d like to share, Nathan?” Adam questioned me.
Somehow I manage to stutter out a reply, “I’m fine, Adam. Why would you think I’d have something to share? Everything is completely fine.”

---

Entry 4

Adam almost caught me today. Honestly, the idea that someone could have found out my secret terrified me, even if was Adam. He would be the one person I know that could help me. I should get help from him. I just can’t bear the thought of someone finding out. What if someone heard and told Vince? I can’t take that risk. I can’t tell anyone.

---

“Nathan, Vincent, come here for a second,” Adam’s voice resonated through the ice rink.
I turn to look at Vince but he just shrugs. I spin around the other way and Vincent follows me as we walk off the ice to where Adam was currently sitting on a bench, taking off his skates.
“Need something, Adam?” Vincent asked him.
“Yeah. You two are watching each other all the time and I know something’s up so you two are going to tell each other or I’ll take away your phones. So give me your phones now.”
I avoided looking at Vincent as I reluctantly handed over my phone to Adam. I see Vincent's phone appear in Adams's hand as I, at all costs, don't look at Vincent. Adam pushes us into a corner. I can vaguely hear me say that he’ll make sure no one disturbs us and I start to panic. I’d rather be anywhere but here. I would rather skate at 20 more Olympics and royally screw up than actually talk to Vincent about my feelings for him. That wasn't necessary. I would be totally fine without this happening. I can't bear to look at Vincent. It was like watching the snow fall, once I started I won't be able to stop.
“So, you want to go first, Nate?”
No. I really don't. If I don't say anything he'll start talking right? Maybe?
“I take that as a no then. I guess I will start.”
“Okay.” It comes out barely louder than a hoarse whisper.
I feel his hand press against my body. I subconsciously lean into his touch as the warmth radiates off of him. I wish I could stay there forever. Instead, I mumble something into his shoulder, “I love you, Vince.”
He kisses the top of my head, “I love you too, Nate.”