Actions

Work Header

Hold Me Tight

Work Text:

For as long as he can remember, Tae's been crushing on his bandmate Jimin.

 

Tae avidly trolls BTS stan twitter and is well aware of the concept of secondary creations. 

 

Fanart, fluffy fics, smut fics, explicit sims videos - he's seen it all. He laps it all up. He comments under the pseudonym: VMIN4EVA

 

One thing that bugs him loads is the inaccurate portrayal of Jimin and his dynamic in fics. For example, there are some fics which depict Jimin pining on him, being totally obsessed with him, wanting to jump his bones at every second.

 

Please. The real Jimin is sweet, kind, caring and flirty, but it's not like he's ever going to want to bang Tae.

 

Tae can only dream.

 

(And read the better, more thoughtful, well-written fics.) 

 

One day, a crazy idea hits him - Why should he put up with the dearth of vmin fics? Why should he cry over yet another mis-tagged Vmin bros fic?

 

(Note: he admits that there are many good ones - just not quite enough to feed his appetite.)

 

He should write his own! That way, it'll go exactly the way he wants it to be. Problem solved!

 

His first fic (a fluffy 900 word drabble entitled - Mandaggo Loving) gains him 50 kudos and zero comments.

 

He's a little disappointed (it was a fucking cute story based on their vlive series) but he won't give up. He's pretty sure he's aced the characterization.

 

He reckons that as great as a storyteller as he thinks he is, he doesn't always know how to use the right vocabulary and phrases to suit his scenes.

 

Maybe it’s time to look for a beta.

 

 

 

The only person Tae sees as a potential proof-reader and concrit giver is Namjoon. He’s the smartest, most articulate person Tae knows! However, he can’t possibly let Namjoon know that he’s been writing Vmin fic. While Namjoon is the chillest person ever who’s open to read any and everything – that’s just too weird, even by Tae’s standards.

 

There’s only one foolproof method to go about this. Name substitution.

 

When Tae sends Namjoon the 10th draft of his sophomore effort - “Little Star”, Namjoon asks, “What is this?”, bafflement etched on his face.

 

“I wrote this really cute story,” says Tae nonchalantly. “I’ve been dabbling in writing recently. Could you check and see if it’s alright?”

 

Namjoon scans the document for a long moment.

 

“Well?” asks Tae. “What do you think?”

 

“Taehyung. The hell? Did you just send me Exo fanfiction?” says Namjoon incredulously.

 

Oh, that. Yeah, every “Jimin” had been changed to “Chanyeol”, and every “Taehyung” had been changed to “Baekhyun”.

 

“Yes…?” says Tae, a little hurt. “I thought you’d be the last person to judge…”

 

Namjoon looks apologetic. “No, no. Not judging. Hey, if this is your way of doing some… self-improvement, I’ll help you.”

 

Tae heaves a sigh of relief and sits down next to Namjoon. Thank goodness.

 

 

 

The thing is, Namjoon starts suspecting something is off when the fluffy stories keep coming and their titles are like – “I Need U”, “4’o clock”, “Serendipity” and “Spring Day.” Moreover, “Chanyeol” is oddly, often described as someone who’s short and cute(?!), and has cute puffy cheeks, chiseled abs, thick thighs, and a nice round butt. The stories are ALWAYS in the perspective of “Baekhyun”, and tend to depict how he’s pining for “Chanyeol” from afar and how he gradually wins his heart after trials and tribulations. Baekhyun tends to be depicted as a happy, outgoing boy from Daegu who loves strawberries, farming and his family…

 

Namjoon ain’t stupid.


He decides to be a good roommate and not directly question Tae about it. Let Tae come talk to him when he’s ready to come clean.

 

However, things change when he receives a story titled, “War of Hormone.”

 

(Tae was blushing as he explained, “This one is kind of long… and a little different…” and practically ran off.)

 

  1. Namjoon hadn’t expected to be subjected to 25K words of very explicit smut.
  2. Tae apparently did not use ctrl+f to replace all words, because Namjoon definitely read a “Jimin thrusts harder” and “Taehyung comes with a shout” at some point.

 

At first, Namjoon does attempt to review the 25k piece about his beloved babies doing the nasty in multiple locations, multiple positions. It's actually Tae's best work by far (who would have thought that smut was his forte!?) and Namjoon would be lying if he said he wasn't... affected.

 

He halts when he sees the first "Jimin thrusts harder" and highlights it in yellow, sends the piece back to Tae. Seconds later, Tae is bursting into the Vmon bedroom, strawberry milk dripping down his lips onto his shirt. Namjoon chokes on his spit because that image really resembles the last scene he read. One where "Chanyeol" came on "Baekhyun's" face.

 

"You can't tell Jimin!" screams Tae, horrified at Namjoon's discovery. Namjoon gathers himself and says, "I won't. But you should. You can't keep pining and writing fake EXO fic. God, do you post this online? Please tell me you don't."

 

Tae nods and smiles sheepishly.

 

Namjoon groans. "This is ridiculous. Tae, I love you. But you have to tell Jimin you're interested in... " Namjoon pauses to read from the laptop. "Kissing every inch of his fine-ass cutie body. Or I'm sending this to him."

 

And so, Tae lies that he'll stop writing Vmin fic and insists that he’ll confess to Jimin within a week. Secretly, he sneaks out to the dining room in the middle of the night to continue with his stories.

 

He feels a little pathetic that he's resorting to this outlet instead of simply telling Jimin that he really wants to date and love and cherish and bone him... But how does one do that?

 

Jimin, being the sweet person he is, would probably feel bad for him and date him out of pity. Then they'd break up one day and Tae would never ever regain his friendship and that's the last thing Tae wants.

 

It is during one of the late night sprint sessions with a few of his close twitter mutuals that Jimin suddenly bursts into the room, concern etched across his beautiful soft features.

 

"Taetae, you've been really tired all week. Are you okay? Oh. You're writing something? Is that a diary? Wanna share?"

 

Tae's caught in utter surprise and he blurts, "EXO fanfiction!" before he can stop himself.

 

"Huh?" Jimin appears confused.

 

"Yeah... " says Tae, hitting save quickly and closing the window.

 

"Okay... Which pairing?"

 

Tae just gapes at Jimin.

 

"Well?"

 

"Baekyeol..." whispers Tae, burying his face in his palms.

 

"Oh." Jimin looks thoughtful. "I personally prefer Kaisoo, but I'll help you read it if you want some advice..." he says, stepping closer.

 

"NO!" screams Tae, slamming his laptop shut, knocking down his open strawberry milk bottle in his haste.

 

"Okay, okay. Sorry." Jimin pulls out a packet of tissues and hands them to Tae. "Tae. It's okay. You know you can tell me anything right? I don't mind that you write fics... I mean I read them too, sometimes..."

 

"You do?"

 

"Yeah, some of them are really good... Even the BTS ones.”  Jimin smiles, a little embarrassed. "You know you can trust me with anything right? I hope you feel better now that you've told me."

 

Tae wipes up the mess and goes to bed. It's been a weird ass night.

 

 

 

Initially, Jimin treats it as no big deal. Tae’s allowed to find his own creativity outlets, allowed to keep his own secrets. They’re best friends but Jimin doesn’t ever want to pry into stuff Tae’s not ready to talk about.

 

But then it keeps happening. Whenever Jimin steps out of his bedroom in middle of the night for a glass of water, Tae’s already there in the dining room, typing furiously away. The moment Jimin comes closer, Tae will yell and close his laptop hurriedly.

 

Jimin’s getting a little worried.

 

One night, Jimin tiptoes quietly into the dining area. Tae happens to be totally engrossed in whatever he’s writing, and Jimin takes a moment to appreciate how attractive his side profile looks when he’s focused like that. He really is beautiful, inside and out. Jimin steps closer, angles his head such that he can kind of read what’s on the screen.

 

“Just put it in me already, Taetae,” is all he manages to read before Tae starts screaming bloody murder and shutting his laptop.

 

“What!! Jimin! You scared me! Why… What did you see?” Tae’s repeatedly banging his forehead onto the table. Poor thing, that must hurt.

 

Jimin caresses Tae’s forehead tenderly, checking for any forming bruises. Tae just recoils from the touch and stares at the ground, refuses to look at Jimin.

 

“Are you… writing some kind of sex scene involving… yourself?” asks Jimin. “I thought you did Baekyeol fic?”

 

Tae opens his mouth. His mouth stays open for very long. “I suppose I’m writing out a fantasy of mine…” he says, cheeks turning a little pink.

 

Jimin feels his face heating up, something weird swelling in his chest. “With… who?”

 

Tae opens his mouth again. He blinks. Jimin blinks back at him.

 

 “I don’t think I’m ready to say!” groans Tae in embarrassment, fumbling for his laptop and running back into his room before Jimin can say anything else.

 

 

 

Nights later, Jimin is alone in his bedroom (Hobi's hanging out with his sister), half playing with his phone, half wondering about what on earth's been up with Tae.

 

Tae's been avoiding him since that incident in the dining room. It hurts. It hurts more than Jimin thought it would, and he can't put a finger on to why it's so painful and annoying.

 

Tae is a grown man with desires. He can imagine fucking whoever he wants. He doesn't need to update Jimin on every single thing about his life. 

 

Maybe Jimin's a little bit annoyed that whoever Tae wanted to put "it" into was referring to Tae as "Taetae" in his story. 

 

That should be a name that only Jimin gets to call, for heaven's sake!

 

Sighing in exasperation, Jimin visits the sits he's recently been obsessed with - AO3.

 

You see, when Jimin mentioned randomly to Tae that he sometimes reads BTS fic, he might have omitted the fact that he's been recently obsessed with Vmin fics.

 

It all started out of curiosity, really. He'd been scrolling thru BTS' twitter mentions and there was a link saying "Completed! Check out this Jikook Fake Marriage Saga (10/10)!"

 

Jimin was intrigued. He’d known about shipping but hadn't cared too much about it. As long as ARMYs were happy, they could do whatever the hell they liked! 

 

He clicked, and boy, was he hooked. The whole saga was really well-written and Jimin found himself clicking on other works by that particular author, who had practically written every BTS pairing, and even some OT3s.

 

That night, Jimin had realized one thing. His favorite pairing was, undoubtedly, Vmin. 

 

And so, Jimin becomes a voracious consumer of Vmin fic. He sticks mostly to fluff and light angst. 

 

Tae and him just fit so well in fanfiction! Just fucking adorable.

 

 

 

So anyway, back to the present. Recently, Jimin's been reading fic from this pretty new author who goes by VMIN4EVA.

 

Said writer doesn't have that many kudos or hits, but has a fairly decent following. 

 

This writer's characterizations are spot on, in Jimin's humble opinion. 

 

Everything's just written really cutely! Sometimes the vocabulary, phrasing and grammar is slightly off, but that's okay. It just makes everything seem more realistic. They're usually written from Tae's POV and Tae kind of speaks like that anyways!

 

The scenarios are varied –

  1. Vmin meeting for the first time at a park while dog-walking (Spring Day)! 
  2. Vmin university au where Namjoon, their senior sets them up (I Need U; that one had some vminjoon undertones, which was... interesting!)!
  3. Vmin soulmate!coffeeshop au where Tae's a fumbling barista and Jimin's a hot customer (Serendipity)!
  4. Vmin canon fic where Jimin wears his birthday Gucci sweater, meets Tae at the park before dawn and they talk about life and end up kissing (4 o'clock; A masterpiece - Jimin bawled like a baby because of this one)!

 

Tae's usually written as pining like crazy over Jimin and that's a really nice idea. Jimin loves compliments, loves attention and for someone like fic!Tae to care and want him so much... 

just makes Jimin feel really content and pleased. (And loved!)

 

VMIN4EVA has a few new fics up, with scary tags like Explicit!; Smut!; Porn with some Plot!. Jimin's been holding off on reading them because anything with smut or major warnings is kind of too weird for him at this point.

 

But he's been kind of moody, and real Tae's been kind of cold, so maybe he needs a pick me up.

 

VMIN4EVA is a great writer and Jimin's sure he won't be disappointed.

 

 

 

Vmin smut, it turns out, is fucking hot. If Jimin were to rate VMIN4EVA's usual fluff pieces, he'd give them a solid 10/10.

 

If Jimin were to rate the smut, he'd give it 20/10. Maybe 100/10.

 

The first smut fic Jimin clicks on is "War of Hormone", a master's thesis depicting fic!Jimin and fic!Tae doing various kinds of sexual acts. In various places.

 

It's set in canon too, and wow, the descriptions of the dorm, their favorite playground, the bighit bathroom, the Yoonjin bedroom, the company van, Jimin's family home are just incredible! 

 

It's as if VMIN4EVA is extremely well-acquainted with all these locations. Jimin wishes he could award author-nim 100 kudos for the research and stalking!

 

Initially, Jimin reads the smut with pure amazement, but gradually there's that nasty heat pooling at pit of his stomach and before he knows it he's touching himself. Touching himself to fic!Tae give him wet, dirty kisses, touching himself to fic!Tae jacking him off, touching himself to fic!Tae placing his mouth around fic!Jimin's dick, touching himself to fic!Tae fucking his brains out.

 

Jimin can't stop. (Thank god Hobi's still not at home!) He feels gross jacking himself off to the idea of Tae doing all these things to him, but he's addicted. He ends up coming so hard, harder than he's ever come by himself or with other people.

 

When he's done with "War of Hormone", he clicks on another fic. Then another. Then yet another.

 

(Something in the back of his head tells him to stop, that this is so wrong, but it's like he can only think with his dick.)

 

The latest smutty fic is titled "I only have you." 

 

It's fucking good. As always, the Vmin relationship is portrayed as cute and loving. Fic!Tae had a terrible, embarrassing day at work and fic!Jimin offers to make him feel better by, guess what?

 

Surprise, surprise. Letting fic!Tae fuck him. 

 

Soon, fic!Jimin is lying on his bed, impatiently letting fic!Tae prep him. 

 

Real Jimin is going crazy on his actual bed, stroking himself once again.

 

Then Jimin reads a pivotal line- "Just put it in me already, Taetae," and promptly comes so hard he sees stars for at least 10 minutes.

 

(In retrospect, Jimin should have quit while he was ahead.)

 

There's no way that could have been a coincidence. Tae's VMIN4EVA!? Tae's been writing vmin fic? Explicit vmin fic? OMG.

 

Jimin sighs, grabs some tissue from his bedstand and cleans himself up. 

 

Has Tae been into him all this time? VMIN4EVA's fics have mostly been about Tae pining for Jimin, about Tae wishing Jimin would love him back. 

 

Also, VMIN4EVA's writing style sounds alot like Tae's usual rambling. VMIN4EVA seems to know canon!locations super well.

 

Jimin scrolls through the rest of "I only have you," hoping to find more clues that can confirm his suspicions. 

 

The fic's ending is sweet as usual, with fic!Vmin cuddling in bed, professing how they want go on forever.  Fic!Tae ends with a line that sends Jimin's heart racing - "I only have you." 

 

Then he reads the ending note - 

 

"Hi guys, this is my last fic. 

 

I've been swept away with writing all this fake scenarios and it's not good for me. 

 

I'm a super obsessed fan of real Jimin... it's not like he's ever going to like me right? Lol. 

 

Thanks to everyone for always leaving nice comments! I'll respond to them soon."

 

 

 

Jimin's first thought is "What? No more fics from VMIN4EVA?" NOO!"

 

But soon he calms down and thinks deeper about it. This is his best friend. 

 

This is his dearest friend using a pseudonym, using writing to express his hidden feelings for him.

 

Maybe Jimin's been stupid for not realizing how obsessed he's been with the idea of Tae loving and cherishing and kissing and banging him. For not realizing how much he loves Tae back.

 

He has to let Tae know how he feels. But how?

 

 


It’s 4 o’clock in the morning – Tae’s favorite time. He sits alone, waiting anxiously at the bench in the secluded park where he and Jimin often meet up to talk, laugh, swear, and cry about life. The beautiful bluishness of twilight and calm quietness of the surroundings do nothing to alleviate Tae’s feelings of unease.

 

A few hours ago, he’d received a message from Jimin – “I need to talk to you badly… Can we meet at the park? Same place, same time. Please. See you there, Taetae.”

 

Now Tae hasn’t been speaking much to Jimin. He’s been too ashamed after the whole incident in the dining room where Jimin caught him writing vmin smut. But when Jimin, the loveliest person in Tae’s world, needs something, Tae’s gonna be there for him. Jimin’s given him so much – Tae truly means every single word in the letter in Hawaii. Jimin listens to his worries, understands him deeply, loves him unconditionally even though he’s lacking in many ways.

 

Tae can only try his hardest to do the same for Jimin.

 

Tae waits. The sky brightens as the darkness gradually fades away but Jimin still hasn’t appeared. That’s not surprising – Jimin’s known to be fashionably late for things.

At 4:30am, Jimin arrives, pretty in the Gucci sweater that Tae had gifted him for his birthday.

 

He’s smiling softly as he approaches. He wordlessly sits himself down on the bench next to Tae, barely leaving any space between them.

 

“Hi Taetae,” he says warmly, snaking an arm around Tae’s shoulder. “I wanted to tell you something.”

 

Tae holds his breath. “Jimin… Are you okay?”

 

“I’m good. Don’t worry. Are… you okay?” asks Jimin, cuddling Tae closer to him. Tae shivers from the contact. He’s missed this. Missed being close to Jimin.

 

“I’m sorry for being weird lately. I think I’m okay,” replies Tae.

 

“You sure?” says Jimin, raising an eyebrow. “Well, I wanted to be honest with you. I’ve… I’ve read 4 o’clock.” Tae gasps in shock, intense panic sweeping through his entire being. “And all your fics actually,” continues Jimin, voice calm and steady, a stark contrast with the turmoil in Tae’s heart.

 

“How did you? How… God!” says Tae, alarmed. The desire to dig a hole and hide himself is very real. But Jimin seems relaxed? Not angry? Not disgusted?

 

Jimin smiles reassuringly, tickles Tae’s chin like he does for fun sometimes. Tae feels an instant relief.

 

“I don’t mind that you thought about all that. Or wrote and posted it, for that matter,” says Jimin sweetly. “Us being here. It’s like your 4 o’clock fic isn’t it? I’ve been wanting to skip to the ending.” A brief pause, and Tae wracks his brain to try to remember what he’d written. “The part where we kiss?”

 

Tae gulps, his heart speeding like a bullet train. Jimin’s eyes are twinkling with delight. He leans in, and then they’re kissing and it’s slow, sweet and clumsy, nothing like magic, nothing fierce, nothing too passionate. Quite unlike how Tae tends to describe Jimin’s kisses in his fics. But Tae doesn’t mind. He’ll let Jimin kiss him for as long as he likes. Forever, hopefully.

 

It’s only when the rising sun has climbed over the horizon that they reluctantly break apart.

 

“Shall we move on to another fic then?” asks Jimin, mischievous glint in his eyes.

 

“Wha-What?”

 

“I’ve been wanting to actually do a real life version of War of Hormone, so…” Jimin shrugs and smirks, tries to appear nonchalant.

 

“You… you read that? Oh my god!” exclaims Tae, head spinning with giddiness and excitement and most definitely, love. Jimin nods, eyes crinkling into crescents as he bursts into a fit of giggles.

 

They laugh all the way back to their dorm, to Jimin’s bed, the Yoonjin bedroom, the BigHit bathroom, the company van, their favorite playground.

 

 

 

 

 

 

A few days later during a rehearsal break, Jimin receives an email notification from AO3, indicating that VMIN4EVA’s posted a new work.

 

His natural reflex is to drop everything and run to the bathroom to read, so he does just that. His jaw drops when he reads: